Tribute
by SexyLexiCullen
Summary: The Few. The Proud. The Strong. Returning Marine Edward Masino has spent the first years of his adult life embodying that motto. But as he moves back to the Brooklyn neighborhood where he grew up, he is introduced to a whole new code of ethics. He quickly learns that some rules cry out to be bent, but there are others that, if broken, will get him killed. *Edited to meet TOS*
1. Chapter 1

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA**

**PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU CONTINUE!** **AS THIS WILL BE MY FIRST AND LAST DISCLAIMER. I DO NOT PLAN TO MAKE APOLOGIES OR HAVE EXTREMELY LONG AUTHOR'S NOTES IN EACH CHAPTER. BUT I WILL BE PLACING WARNINGS ON THE CHAPTERS THAT NEED THEM. THAT'S IT, THOUGH! AGAIN, PLEASE READ THIS:** You know how in life you don't get any guarantees? Well, this fic is like that. This is a mob story. It isn't all rainbows and sunshine and fluffy kittens. Bad things happen – both to the good guys and to the bad guys. There is crime and violence and more than a few tears. If you don't think you can handle it, no apologies needed. Just click the X in the corner and move on. I won't be offended or take it personally.

One thing I do ask of you, the reader: let me know what you feel while you're reading it. Give me feedback in the form of a review or PM or message in my group on Facebook. If something makes you mad, I want to know it. If you laughed out loud, hey, I want to hear that too. But whatever you say, please always be respectful.

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And you know me, whatever happens to those around them – and I make NO promises to that effect – **Bella & Edward WILL get their HEA.**

If you're still reading this, welcome to **"Tribute" by SexyLexiCullen**

**Summary: **The Few. The Proud. The Strong. Returning Marine Edward Masino has spent the first years of his adult life embodying that motto. But as he moves back to the Brooklyn neighborhood where he grew up, he is introduced to a whole new code of ethics. He quickly learns that some rules cry out to be bent, but there are others that, if broken, will get him killed. Rated M. Drama. Humor. Romance. Hurt. Friendship. Crime, you name it. It's listed Drama/Romance, but there are many facets. EVENTUAL Canon Couples (Rome wasn't built in a day) Edward/Bella.

***See bottom for cast of major players/posting schedule***

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"**Tribute"**

**Chapter One**

_**W**_hen I got off the bus, I took a deep breath through my nose—enjoying the smell of motor oil and that special something . . .

"Move it, pal!"

Smiling brightly, I went to get my bag. "I love New York," I told the bus driver.

"Enjoy your stay."

Sighing, I grabbed my large duffle they provided me when I joined the Marines four years ago.

It was a tough decision, leaving North Carolina, but I did it. I needed more, and yet I had no idea what "more" was.

But now I was home—where I grew up.

Having only lived in Brooklyn until I was fourteen, and because I haven't been back since, I figured things changed; however, I was still excited to be back.

My father died when I was fourteen, and then Social Services found my mother in Washington State, where I was shipped off to. College…school in general never interested me, and it wasn't as though my mother had the money to send me anyway.

I joined the Marines when I was seventeen . . .

My mother did me that favor; she signed the papers and let me enlist early.

I wasn't ambitious either. I was never high in rank, never truly gave a fuck, except that they fed me and put a roof over my head. Although being a Marine has been my life for a while now, I was excited to have the chance to unwind, figure out who Edward Masino truly is.

"Masino?"

I stopped in my tracks to turn and drop my bag. "Jasper?" With a crooked smirk, I looked my childhood friend over from head-to-toe. He was tall now—a man, just like I was.

"What's up?" He embraced me, slapping my back and pulling away. "All grown up." He palmed my cheeks.

I chuckled, nodding my head. "You, too."

He grimaced, pointing down to my bag. "This is _it_?"

"Yup," I said.

"Your _whole_ life fits in one bag?" Jasper said under his breath, but I still heard him. He looked a bit scrawny, tall and lanky, and he tried to lift the goddamn thing. "Damn, Eddie—no wonder. What'cha got in here…? Your issues?"

"Funny…and no one calls me Eddie anymore." With ease, I picked it back up and slung it over my shoulder. "Thanks for meeting me."

"No problem. I'm double-parked, though—we gotta move it."

"Bet." I speedily followed him onto the escalator, only to run down the moving stairs. People milled about the busy terminal, and we wove our way through them.

Even as a kid, the Port Authority fascinated me—all these people—going this way and that way.

And everyone has a story . . .

Suddenly, Jasper ran even faster, sprinting and shouting at the officer who was giving him a ticket. "Oh, hey—" he waved his hands, "I was just picking up a friend. I'm here now. No need for a—"

"Ticket?" the cop finished for him, smiling. "This is a no parking zone." He slapped the piece of paper into Jasper's hand.

"Uh . . . he's disabled." Jazz jerked a thumb to me.

To hide my grin, I averted my gaze, slightly adjusting my bag.

"He just got outta that VA hospital—"

"Not my problem." The officer walked around Jasper's Honda Accord.

"Where's your sense of patriotism?!" Jazz hollered after him. "Never forget!"

Once he was gone, I laughed at my old friend. "Still a pathological liar?" When he was a kid, he'd make up the most unbelievably funny and outlandish stories. Some of which would actually get us out of trouble, while others got us into more hot water.

"No way." He entered the car and then popped his head out again. "Get in."

Still laughing, feeling amazing and lighter than I had in years, I did as he said—throwing my bag into the back seat. "Thanks for letting me crash at your place, too." I hit his arm as he started the car.

"Don't mention it. When Grandma died . . . she left me the house."

"Seriously?" I asked, surprised. When we spoke, he hadn't mentioned it. Then again, we only talked briefly about me coming back to New York.

"Dead-ass." He pulled away from the curb. "All I gotta do is pay taxes."

"Wow."

"You can have my old room—Gram's bedroom was bigger, so I moved into it." He looked back to me. "I sold a lot of her shit—I'm still going to school."

"Good for you," I said.

"Bells and me do okay . . . She just graduated high school and plans to start school again in October—that's when her classes start—she wants to do hair or something, and she's looking for a summer job now." He crossed his fingers. "I just hope she gets off her ass and does _some_thing."

"Isabella . . . How is she?" I laughed at the memory of the small girl. "Oh, I mean, Bella-Boo-Baby!" That's what their grandmother used to call her. I'd dubbed her Silly Girl because she was just...a silly girl.

"Bella-Boo's not a baby anymore." He snorted.

Jasper's little sister used to follow us all over the neighborhood. She used to dress like us, act like us, and she tried her best at sports.

My friend used tease her, and then she'd come to me with tears in her eyes. In some ways—on a couple of occasions—I was more of a big brother to her than Jazz: helping to dry her tears when she'd scrape her knee to letting her hang out with us. I'd be there for her sometimes.

For the most part, the three of us acted like siblings; I was always at their house.

One time, when Jasper, some kids from the block, and I were playing stickball in the street, Bella pulled back to take a swing and went too far—wound up giving me a black eye . . .

She cried and kissed my cheek, saying it was "all better now"; meanwhile, I was cupping my eye, all dramatic-like, swearing I was blind. But I did say thank you for that kiss.

That was the last memory I had of her.

He rolled his eyes. "She's a pain in my ass...acting out, loose with her mouth, trying to be some tough guy, trolling around the 'hood with her girls and shit."

Surprised by that, I asked, "Really?" She was many things, but she was also very sweet, a good girl—almost honest to a fault, which was the exact opposite of her brother. Bella never got into any trouble.

"She used to be this little goody-two-shoes."

He made a face, shaking his head. "I don't know, man...It's been hard. Grams babied her—fuckin' coddled her, and Bells took it really hard when she died. To top it all off, now _I_ have to teach her to be an adult?" He pointed to himself.

"I mean, _me..._?" He pulled at his hair, groaning through a chuckle. "What the fuck do I know? It's like the blind leading the blind, but I try my best . . . _I know she's still hurting, though_," he whispered that last part, and I didn't catch it.

"Must be hard," I commented, staring out the window. The streets of Manhattan were as busy and crowded as they ever were, and it was weird. Odd because I still had a sense of direction, knowing we were headed to the highway. I didn't even drive back then, when I lived in New York City. Well, Bensonhurst, Brooklyn.

But then Jasper smiled, giving me a brief glance; I'd turned back when I felt his eyes on me. "That's my sister, though, you know? I'll do anything for her, but she does have…issues. I think she's still depressed—or lost, masking it with a smile. She went from being this shy homebody when Gram was alive—always studying, doing the right thing, and now . . . Well, she hasn't been the same since Gram died, which was the_ same_ time she got with her boyfriend." His voice continued to rise, like he was getting even more upset. "She's not being Bella. She's trying to be like the crowd she's chillin' with, especially that fucko, her man."

"Who—" I was about to ask who she was dating, when he cut me off.

"Worst part is…" he sighed, stopping short at a red light. "Bells knows I worry, and she feels bad about it, so she tries to act normal—act happy…And she won't talk to me about a damn thing, when we used to be close . . . Otherwise, all the girl does is chill with her friends, trying to act grown, rolling with them. When—" He just stopped talking.

I didn't know what to say, just listening again.

"I just don't think Bells knows who she is yet—she's not a person yet, still very young and immature. Like she's stuck? Hell. I don't fucking know." Jasper looked to me again. "Sorry for venting, bro." He chuckled, letting out a large breath. "I just—"

"Dude, I'm here. I'm listening," I laughed, patting his back.

Deep down, I know all too well what it's like not having anyone to confide in. Your problems build and build, and then you unload on the ones you trust. Sadly, I've yet to have that opportunity.

But I hoped Jasper would be that person for me, too.

"Plus, that motherfucker—her boyfriend is always lounging on our couch." He carried on. "He's . . . bad news. You know, he runs with Emmett and them."

"Emmett." I slapped my knee. "How's he doin'?" When I was a kid, Emmett was the toughest kid on our block—always getting into trouble, always up to something, but the chicks loved him, and he always looked out for Jazz and me.

Jasper's face fell. "We don't—we don't hang out like we used to."

"Oh . . ." I stared out the window again, at the bumper-to-bumper traffic we were in. "This is probably the only thing I didn't miss." I gestured to the street.

"Eh . . . s'not too bad," he mumbled.

"What's Emmett do?" I asked.

Jasper gave me a fleeting look and then focused on the road. "You remember Carlisle Colleoni Jr.? I know you remember his father, Senior."

Thinking back, I remembered the name all too well. He's quite a few years older than me, and our fathers used to be business associates.

Now the Colleoni family is one of the largest of the five families here in New York—the Mafia. "Of course."

"He's associated," he whispered, turning on the radio.

I shook my head. "Emmett's Irish—"

"And he's _all_ balls." Jazz snorted. "He's Carlisle's little errand boy, but fuck, man. Emmett is living large—gotta a nice apartment and his whip is hot. He never left the block, though—still lives down the street."

"Cool," I commented.

"Cool? He's either looking at future jail time or a cemetery plot—no offense." It was no secret that my pops' was killed in the line of a different duty. "Is that why you came back? Fulfill your namesake?"

"No," I was quick to say. "No way. I came back here because . . . I didn't wanna go overseas again. I was only enlisted six months when I was first deployed—sent me to Iraq."

"Damn," Jazz commented. "You signed up early, too, right?"

I nodded. "Then I was stateside for nine months—training, training others—before I went to Afghanistan…spent a year there," I sighed heavily. "So, when it came time to re-enlist . . . I just didn't. I hated the South and out West . . . There ain't shit out there."

"Right . . . What are you going to do for money?"

"I have some saved," I said.

"We need a counter person at Sal's."

"You're working at Sal's Pizzeria now?" I threw my head back and laughed. We used to steal sodas and anything else we could from there. And old man Ruffalo, the owner, used to chase us out with his broom.

"Emmett has his purposes . . . I don't know. Bells and I fell on hard times. I wouldn't do certain things . . . and Emmett pulled some strings. I manage now."

I shrugged. "I have some cash saved. I'd like to get a car, but I don't necessarily need one. I don't know."

"What the fuck, bro? You just hop on a bus with nowhere to go, nothing to do?" He chuckled. "That takes balls. I could never do that."

"Have you ever . . . even left New York?"

He frowned. "Nope . . . got everything I need in these five boroughs." He winked.

I nodded, reaching into my pocket for a cigarette. "Do you mind?"

"Not at all." He opened his window, turned the music up, and we entered the highway.

Traffic let up, and we didn't hit any more for the duration of the drive. Jasper spoke more about Emmett—said his relationship with him hasn't been the same since he dated Bella. That shocked me, especially since when I think about her, all I see is this little kid, and Emmett . . . Well, he looked like a man back in the ninth grade. I understood it, though. There's no beef between them anymore, as Emmett only took Bella out on one date, but they just don't talk.

That's like the cardinal rule of brotherhood.

Never touch a guy's sister or his girl.

**Thank you for reading**

**Please leave me your thoughts**

**I'll be posting chapter two later on tonight!**

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**Posting Schedule:** I plan to update/post once or twice daily.

This is a drabble, but I'm wordy so...some chaps are shorter/longer.

**Tribute Cast (Please note the name changes/I even list people spoken about often yet are dead)**

Edward Masino, Sr. (Deceased)

Edward Masino, Jr.

Grandma Cigno (Deceased)

Isabella (Bella) Cigno  
Jasper Cigno

Carlisle Colleoni, Sr. (Boss)  
Esme Colleoni  
Mary "Alice" Colleoni (their daughter)

Carlisle (CJ) Colleoni, Jr. (son/under boss/capo/original character)  
Marie Ferraro Colleoni (CJ's wife/Original Character)  
Bianca Colleoni (CJ's daughter)

Emmett McCarty  
Jacob Black.  
Riley Esposito (CJ's right hand)

Rosalie Guzzo (Second cousin to Alice)


	2. Chapter 2

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA**

**Yes, I am reposting. There are 102 established chapters. Also, CH36 will be edited to meet the TOS. To read the unedited version, you'll have to visit TWCS or the Tribute blog. There will be a reminder in CH36**

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"**Tribute"**

**Chapter Two**

"Thank God we have this driveway—could you imagine finding a spot every day?" Jasper asked as we pulled into his garage.

I craned my neck to see my old block, each side of the curb filled with parked cars. "Nope . . . I'll find out, though," I laughed, leaving the car and the carport.

The sun hit my face, the sounds of birds chirping nearby. The rows of seemingly identical townhouses lined the street, and it was just as I remembered.

"I'm excited to be back," I whispered.

"I'm glad _you're_ back." Jazz nodded, looking to his sneakers. "You were like a brother to me."

I smiled. "You too, bro."

Jasper clapped. "You hungry?"

"I could eat," I admitted, grabbing my bag from the back seat.

From there, we entered the house to raid the fridge. Jasper wasn't lying when he said he had sold a lot of his grandmother's things. The house was almost bare, except for basic furniture, and I remembered his grandmother being a pack rat—sort of.

Either way, it turned out she was an antique collector, and all of those things paid for three years of college for him.

"It was sell the house, and we could _both_ go to school, or we could take turns. I'm in business management and accounting, taking my last credits this summer. And Bells _just_ graduated. Too bad you didn't come last week. You could'a been at her graduation . . ." He hit my leg.

"Too bad," I said.

"It's going to work out, though. I'll get her through school. Her program is only a year or something. How long does it take to learn how to do hair?" He snorted.

"That's awesome." I sipped my beer.

"_You're_ still young—" He gestured to me with his mouth open, stuck for words.

"Just turned twenty-two." I raised the longneck. "_Last_ week as a matter of fact. Who knows?"

Truth be told, not even I knew, and I was a little upset that Jazz made me think about all that. He says I have some pair for just hopping on a bus, but I never gave the rest of it more thought. I didn't have anything in North Carolina—where I was based at the barracks of Camp Lejeune, where I started. Then I was deployed, and I went back there. Then I was deployed again, and so on went the cycle.

When I came back from Afghanistan three months ago, I felt as though I came back to nothing...again.

No one was waiting for me with open arms.

There was never anyone to worry about me while I was overseas.

I didn't write to anyone.

No one wrote to me.

And being back stateside . . .

What the _fuck_ was in North Carolina for me?

Nothing.

There was nothing tying me to Washington either.

When you have nothing and no one, you have nothing nor anyone to lose.

So, yeah. I hopped on a bus and figured I'd take my chances.

All I_ ever_ had were those few and far between phone chats with my old best friend. I just mentioned coming back to Brooklyn, and Jasper was all for it—offered me a room, offered to help me in any way he could—which was the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me to date.

"Come work with me for pocket money," he said. "You'll get to see everyone." He rolled his eyes. "Same fucking people . . . I bet they still recognize you, Mr. Masino."

"Right," I sighed, leaning back on the sofa. "Yeah, sure . . . I need a job."

"Take a few days, though." He grimaced at me. "You're so stiff—like you're still standing at attention." He saluted me.

I gave him the finger, and then we both laughed loudly.

"Jane's looking good. Remember her?" he asked.

"Jane Volturi." I nodded with a smile. "She gave me my first hand job."

"You never told me that!" he yelled, and it made me jump back. "You were what, thirteen? Fourteen?!"

"So?" I asked. "She was what, sixteen? She knew what she was doing."

"Damn . . . you fucker. I dreamed about that all through high school," he grumbled. "She's even more of a piece of ass now—got new tits with Daddy's dough." He cupped his chest.

I scrunched my nose. "I like natural ones better."

"Yeah, but . . . they're huge, Ed." He blew out a breath and guzzled his beer.

He'd said it before, but I dislike it when people call me anything other than Edward. I didn't wanna be rude and correct him...again, not when I just got here. "It's been a while, huh?" I raised a brow.

"You have no idea. I have a bachelor pad—" He widened his arms. "Bells doesn't give a fuck about anything I do . . . I'm unlucky, I guess. Broads must eat up that Marine shit, right?"

I shook my head, pursing my lips.

"Tell me about it." He shook his head, too, and then stared at me. "We should go out—dress up, hit a few bars in Bay Ridge. We could even go into the city."

I shrugged. "Whatever. Not tonight, though. That was a long-ass bus ride."

"You still have your accent . . . Edwood Ant'ny from Bensonh_oi_st." His own tone got even thicker. "I bet that's why you got all that pussy in high school."

I smirked in his direction. "Women dig the New York thing more than the Marine gig . . . I never lost it, even if I moved away a long time ago."

"When you're _in_ New York, they don't give a fuck. Play up the Marine thing . . ." He trailed off wearing a frown.

"Bet I need my shit greased more than you do."

He put his hand out to stop me. "Just stay away from my sister. Don't let the, uh, availability steer you—"

"Whoa!" I rushed out. "Isabella? No offense, but . . . she's a kid."

"She's eighteen now."

"We grew up together. I don't see her that way—I sure as fuck don't _think_ about her that way," I laughed at him. "Relax."

"Jake." He nodded. "He'd fucking chop your balls off—sick motherfucker." He pointed to his temple, narrowing his eyes. "I don't know what she sees in him."

"Jake . . .?"

"Jacob Black? Remember him?" he asked. "That little punk who moved here in the seventh grade? He was in our class—came from upstate?"

I shrugged. "I don't remember."

"I heard stories," he whispered. "It's not like I can say anything."

Furrowing my brow, I leaned into him, not liking his tone or what he might be implying. "He treat her okay? If not . . . as her brother, you should say something."

"You know the type." He made a face. "The prick lays it on thick with me—when I'm around—being attentive, calling her honey, sweetie pie—trying to overcompensate for something. You know? I just don't know what it is. Meanwhile, I _know_...there's something up, but she don't talk to me. Not even when I flat out ask shit. Bella's a baby. Jake's a grown-ass-man—they're years apart in age and levels of maturity. They've been together for a year or something. He's a hustler, and she just got outta school. My worst fear is him getting pinched and Bella's with him—"

"Forbid her from—"

"Yeah, right." He let out a groan, cutting me off again. "I told Bella to stay away from him many times. With my luck, if I harp on her any more, she'll marry the bastard. She never listens to me . . . They fight a lot, but she swears it never goes further than arguing." He sipped his beer. "I decked him one time, almost went to old man Colleoni—I was so pissed."

"What happened?" I asked.

"She had a bruise, and I supposedly jumped to conclusions. She swore nothin' happened . . . Whatever. He knows. He touches Bella in anger, I wouldn't give a fuck. I'll kill him. Around the way, though, I hear things about him—business-wise."

"Oh . . ."

"Jake's Emmett's best friend now—they do everything together. You know what I'm saying?" From his tone, I guessed both Emmett and Jake were obviously connected. "He's Native American, though, so he's not in that deep—just a pawn."

"Right." I finished my brew. "You seem to be . . . very interested in what they do."

"No," he said. "I'm just trying to bring you up to speed—tell you what everyone's up to. That's all . . . And I remember what old man Colleoni said to you . . . at your dad's wake."

"Funny . . . I don't remember." And I honestly didn't. I recalled there being many mafiosi at my father's services, but I didn't remember my godfather speaking to me at all.

Jasper looked up to the ceiling. "I remember being jealous because of how close you guys were." Colleoni Senior was my godfather, and I considered him an uncle. Well, I did while my father was still alive. Once he died, Colleoni stopped looking out for me. "I was angry at you, and then you were shipped away."

"Jealous? Of what?" He might as well have three heads right now; that's the way I was looking at him.

"Carlisle Colleoni Sr. said, 'if you ever need anything, you call me.' And you know what that means."

I shook my head. "I honestly don't remember that."

"Well, now you know who to talk to. Emmett and Jake are on Junior's crew. You get in good with them . . . Hey, I haven't seen the old man around for a few. His son runs things in this neighborhood now, but if you went to him . . ."

"What's your obsession with this?" I asked, incredulous. "Do you want to be connected with them or something?"

"What did I say earlier?" he shouted. "I'm just sayin'."

"All right," I sighed, getting up from the couch. "You want another beer?"

"Yeah . . . let's go sit on the stoop."

My first day back in Brooklyn proved to be a boring event. There was never a red carpet rolled out for me, and I hadn't seen anyone I used to know besides Jasper. All of that was fine, as I hoped to get comfortable again.

Never having been comfortable within my own skin since I had left eight years ago, I hoped to ease back into it—comfort.

Jasper's old bedroom only had a dresser, a closet, and the twin-sized bed from when he was a kid. It was cool. I didn't need much, and this was more than I had in the barracks.

After drinking quite a few more beers and talking a whole mess of shit with Jasper, we decided to call it a night. He opens the pizzeria in the morning, so he'd hoped I'd fair well on my own.

Right before I fell asleep, I figured I'd take a walk tomorrow . . . explore the place I always considered to be my home.

**Thank you for reading.**

**Please leave me your thoughts.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA**

**Once again, thank you for reading and reviewing. **

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Three**

**_I_**n the morning, I woke up to the sun beaming on me through the window. There were shades in the room, I just hadn't put them down last night.

Nevertheless, I was surprised when I glanced at the clock. It was close to eleven, and I hadn't slept that long in a dog's age.

My neck was stiff from being curled while I slept. I'm not crazy tall, but my feet dangled from the small bed.

After stretching, I used the bathroom and cleaned up, and then I went downstairs.

Then I was granted with another surprise—some dude sitting on Jasper's couch. He had dark hair, tan skin, and he wore a t-shirt and board shorts. He looked as though he was ready to hit up a pool, and I guessed it was Bella's boyfriend.

_Who else was it going to be?_

"Masino?" he asked.

I grinned. "Jake."

"You remember me." He jerked his head, leaving the sofa.

"Of course," I lied, walking over to shake his hand.

"The Army, huh?"

I nodded. "Yeah . . . I was actually a Marine, though."

"That's tough—want coffee?" He turned for the kitchen. "Bells sets it every night—bet it's still hot."

I followed after him. "Sounds good."

"From what I remember and hear . . . you're a stand-up guy." He'd turned back, talking and walking.

"Depends on who you ask." I strolled past him to collapse down into a chair at the table.

Jake laughed, pouring me a cup of coffee. Nothing was funny.

"I take it black."

He didn't say anything and sat across from me, placing my cup down. "How's it being back?"

I shrugged. "Don't really know yet."

"I promised Bells I'd take her to the beach . . . You're more than welcome to tag along."

"Nah, I'm cool." I sat back. "She's home? I haven't seen her yet." Last night, she'd called Jasper to say she was going to be late. I didn't even hear her come in. Of course, I was beat last night.

"She's up in her room." He pointed to the ceiling. "Doesn't take this long to put on a fucking bathing suit, but you know broads, right?" He looked to his watch. "They're waiting for us outside, too."

I'd only known him five minutes, and I already didn't like him. There was just something about him—I got a douchebag vibe from him and shit—I felt it in my gut.

Plus, he was trying too hard at being friendly.

Usually, when people do that it's to overcompensate for other things . . .

Jasper pretty much told me that yesterday—I remembered him saying that.

But right now, I saw it with my own eyes.

Regardless of that fact, I smiled and sipped my coffee.

"Any big plans today?" he asked.

The coffee was phenomenal, and I continued to drink it. I was used to drinking mud in comparison.

Then I felt Jake's eyes on me, looking back to him over the rim of the mug. "What...?" I wondered why he was staring so hard—what his problem was—as I scrubbed a hand over my face and put my cup down.

"I asked you..." He chuckled—again—finding something hilarious and tossing his head, yet I had no idea what was so funny. "Do you have any big plans today...being back after so long and all?" He waved a hand.

"Thought I'd take a walk today . . . Is the car lot on Bath Avenue still there?"

"Big Joey's . . . Yeah, it's there. Drop my name. He'll take care of you."

"Nice." I wouldn't drop him or his name anywhere. "Thanks." Sighing, I tried to weigh my options. The money I had would last longer if I just succumbed to public transportation and my feet.

"We hafta get together . . . Em knows you're here. He's excited to see you." He smiled very wide, showing me all his teeth.

"Same here." It wasn't necessarily a lie; I'd like to see Emmett. But the only person I was psyched about seeing was Jasper . . . Bella, too. "We had some good times—the three of us."

"Jazz should totally come . . . If you can get his ass out the house. He don't do nothing no more." He shook his head.

Again, I didn't have a reply.

"I'm ready!" a female hollered, followed by some small, rapid flip-floping steps.

I turned my head and did a double take at who I guessed was Bella.

_Once more, who else was it going to be?_

Bella had stopped short to stare at me, and she was gorgeous, wearing denim shorts, a blue bikini top, and she had her long brown hair pushed away from her face with these huge sunglasses.

I was dumbfounded by her beauty—her body.

_Christ, Edward. Look away!_

She sure as hell has grown up.

Bella was stacked up top, built like a woman with round hips, and when she'd turned to stuff something into her bag, I caught a glimpse of her large bubble-ass.

She was perfect.

Everything about her was perfect.

Jasper's baby sister was . . .

_Off-limits._

"Edward...?" Her face became a bit flushed, and her smile lit up the room.

All of which made me grin in return . . . It was definitely a warm welcome.

And it finally made me avert my gaze.

Staring at her like that...Geez.

What the fuck was wrong with me? Looking at little Bella-Boo-Baby, Silly Girl like that?

_She's got a body made for sin now...that's why._

And she's no kid, not anymore...at least not the one I equated her to in my mind.

_Fuck me, man._

"Is that you...?" she asked, her tone awestruck. "It's really you?"

"Yeah, it's me." Keeping my eyes off the merchandise, I scratched my brow with my thumb . . . taking one last peek.

_Fuck...I needed to get laid, so I'd stop looking at her like that._

What was the word Jasper used last night?

_Availability. _

Bella definitely didn't dress like a dude anymore. And she most certainly did not resemble an eight-year-old boy now . . . Damn. She was fine.

"How are you?" I peeled my ass off the seat to go give her a hug.

She embraced me delicately before backing away. "I-I'm good. How have you been?"

"Great." I nodded, rubbing the back of my neck at a loss. "The coffee's awesome. Thank you."

Bella beamed up at me again. "I use Melitta . . . Best coffee there is. You can expect it every morning—"

"'Cause you set the pot." Nervous, I cut her off; we both nodded.

"Right." She clapped, still staring at me, and I . . .

I didn't know what else to say. Back in the day, we didn't have much to talk about, and I doubt we have much in common now.

"So . . ." Feeling uncomfortable, I gave her boyfriend a brief glance. "The beach, huh?"

"Yep." His tone was hostile as he turned to his girl. "What are you doin' dressed like that?" Jake asked her. "Go put a shirt on."

"Um . . . I have one." She showed him the shirt she had in her bag.

"Put it on," Jake instructed.

What shocked me was how fast she complied, almost dropping her bag as she donned the t-shirt. "Like you should talk…always showing off the guns." She flexed her biceps, and I chuckled. "It's nice to see you again." She grabbed my arm, giving it a firm squeeze. "You—wow—y-you're built-up. The, um, Marines must have—" she stammered away, squeezing my arm like it was an orange, and she was about to make some juice.

"I had to work out a lot." I cleared my throat.

"I'd imagine . . ." She trailed off, all breathy-like, her eyes catching mine. When she shifted her weight to her right foot, her hip popped and almost hit me—this cute little sway there.

My eyes turned into slits as I looked down to her.

If I didn't know any better—if it was anyone else, a_ different_ female, I'd swear Bella was checking me out.

"It was great seeing you again." She nodded, running her hand up my bicep. Her touch felt incredible, sent a shiver down my spine. I'd be lying if I denied that. Bella's hands were crazy soft and soothing. "We should catch up later."

"Likewise. Great seeing you." I rushed out.

"Later?" she asked.

"Excuse me?" I raised a brow, having forgotten what she'd asked.

"You're busy later," Jake told her.

She never answered him, her eyes still on me.

"Uh…If you're _not_ busy…sure. I'll just be chillin' with Jazz." I turned, going back for the table.

Bella looked to her boyfriend. "We ready?"

He squared his shoulders, leaving the table to slap my hand. "It was nice meeting you again."

"Same here," I lied, not liking him at all.

There was something about him I hated on the spot. It was more than agreeing with Jasper, just sharing hatred with my best friend.

"Come on." He placed his arm around her, and then ushered her out of the house. Jake had turned back to grill me from behind her head.

I stared after them, or mainly at Bella's ass, and I also widened my arms for Jake. "What?" I mouthed to him, 'cause I don't let nobody look at me like that . . . looking at me like he's gonna do something.

It'd be a shitty start—a fight welcoming me back to Brooklyn, getting into a scuffle on my second day here.

But, hey, Jake and I could definitely do this.

I was waiting, taking a step toward them.

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	4. Chapter 4

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Four**

**_O_**nce they got to the door, he'd backed down, looked away from me.

_Punk._

In an attempt to shake off the aggravation, I opened the fridge to make myself something to eat. But then I heard someone shout, "Masino!"

Knitting my brows together, I looked to the front door again.

"AY-O! Masino!" A deep voice boomed.

Slamming the refrigerator closed, I walked to open the door and stare out.

"Yo!" Some huge motherfucker shouted from a decked out IROC-Z convertible. Jake and Bella were situated in the back seat already, and a blonde knockout sat shotgun.

I laughed, knowing that was Emmett. "What's good?" Barefoot, I left the house, while he jumped from his car.

"Yo, Money . . ." He hugged me tightly.

"Jesus." I squeezed his bicep. "What the fuck do you bench press? People?"

"Sometimes." He chuckled. "You know how it goes."

I really didn't. "How have you been?"

"Good. I'm hangin' in . . ." He looked me up and down. "You're not doing too bad yourself. You could probably knock a few around."

"If need be . . . _hey_." I shrugged, looking to Jake.

Emmett followed my line of sight. "We're gonna hit up Coney Island . . . Come with us."

"Uh . . . I'm cool—gonna lay low today."

"Come on." He punched my shoulder. "Haven't seen you in forever. There's room." He gestured back to his IROC.

I nodded, knowing I could hop on a bus if I didn't like the scene. "Lemme change."

"Bet . . . take your time." He turned away.

I ran into the house to get ready, and then I had to search for the set of keys Jasper gave me yesterday. I found them fast and did a once-over on the mirror. Since I didn't have a bathing suit, I just wore an undershirt—a white tank—and a pair of jeans. My construction boots were going to have to do, and I kept my dog tags on.

"Shut your mouth and get back there!" Emmett shouted.

There really wasn't that much room in the back. Emmett's chick, Rosalie, had to give up her seat, and she gave me a dirty look as she got in there. "Sorry," I mumbled, getting into the car.

"It's cool," Emmett said to me and turned back to his girl. "Why don't you take a Midol?"

"Fuck you."

"Promise?" he laughed.

"Can we just get to the fucking beach?" Bella hollered.

"Listen to the mouth on you . . . fuckin' broads, right?!" Emmett asked me.

Laughing, I just sat there as we peeled away from the curb.

"We have to pick up Alice," Rosalie said.

"There's no room. Let her small ass take the bus."

"Emmett!"

"All right, I'm goin'. Christ." Those two fought the entire way to pick up this other girl. She didn't live far, only two blocks over.

Of course, as she made her way down her steps, I checked her out. She was a cute, tiny thing with jet-black hair. She was a bit on the thin side and wore huge hoop earrings. All I could focus on were those earrings, which had her name in the middle, Alice, in gold. Her house was big and looked familiar.

Placing it in my memory as the Colleoni residence, my eyes widened. Alice was _Mary_ Alice Colleoni, and I definitely remembered her. She's older now, but just like Bella, she was this teeny thing years back.

"You're Edward Masino."

I turned to the back seat. Bella was now sitting on Jake's lap so they could all fit. "Have we met?" I asked, pretending I didn't know her.

"Years ago. I remember you." She touched my shoulder. "Wow. You're solid . . . The Marines, huh?"

I wondered why everyone said that. "Yeah," I laughed. "You're Alice...?" Again, I knew who she was.

She shook my hand, and I noticed she wore a gold ring that bore her name as well. "That's me. Alice Colleoni . . . I bet you remember my brother?"

"Always hafta name drop," Emmett said under his breath.

Alice still heard him. "I'm just sayin'. Damn . . . CJ's older; he might know my brother."

"I don't," I said, only ever associating with the Colleoni kids at family gatherings. There were age differences between Carlisle Jr., Alice, and myself, and they went to different schools—Catholic school. Well, Junior went to Catholic school. I had no idea where Alice went.

My father was never religious; public school was it for me.

And that all seemed like an eternity ago.

_They all might as well be strangers._

"He knows you," Emmett commented.

I didn't reply because I wasn't too sure how to.

"How long are you staying?" Alice asked. "And why didn't Jasper come?"

"He had to work," Bella answered, looking to me. "Between work and school, he doesn't have time for much else. But don't worry, I won't—"

"B, please." Alice cut her off. "What'd you say?" She looked back to me.

"I didn't say anything," I said.

"Like Bella said. We won't let you be lonely. We'll show you the ropes." She rubbed up my shoulder again, and I let out a laugh.

_These chicks seemed relentless._

"Oww. Why'd you hit me?" Alice shouted.

My head whipped to the backseat, but I didn't see anything out of the ordinary, besides the two chicks in a stare-off. Then I watched as Alice pinched Bella's thigh. "You evil little bitch!" Bella shrieked.

Alice looked smug as she turned her attention to me. "So, how long…? How long will you be here?"

"Uh, I'm not sure how long I'll be around. I'm looking to settle down." I shrugged. "Wherever . . ."

"Settle down?" She seemed very interested in what I said, leaning on the center console. The girl was practically in my face, and I was able to see down her shirt...and there wasn't that much to look at . . . I looked anyway.

"Get off . . . It's hot." Rosalie pushed her, and I wondered if she was on the rag. That bitch had the only attitude.

Alice ignored her. "What do you mean by settle down?"

"You just met the guy, Ali," Emmett laughed. "Give him a few months before he proposes."

"Whoa!" I moved toward the door, away from her. "I meant settle down, like live somewhere long-term." My explanation made Jake and Emmett crack up.

"Damn . . . no need to get all . . . like that." Alice sat back, and she didn't talk to me for the rest of the ride, although I wasn't sure what I had said to offend her.

However, after Emmett parked the car and we all left it, Alice linked her arm to mine as she put her sunglasses on.

"So happy the sun is out . . . it's been gloomy this week." She smiled.

I grinned back, thinking she was cute . . . overall. "You look pretty tan already." And she did. Her skin was almost a caramel color with an orange hue.

"Alice gets her tan from a bottle." Bella chuckled, passing us by.

"Fuck you." Alice flipped her off. "Get out my conversation!"

"You two don't get along?" I asked.

"Who? Me and Bella?" she giggled. "Bitch is like my sister—we're _this_ close." She crossed her fingers and brought them up to show me.

"And youse talk to each other like that?" My eyes went down her shirt again, only this time she caught me.

She sighed. "You—you're—wow."

"Thanks." I took that as a compliment.

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	5. Chapter 5

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Five**

_**L**_ooking around, Coney Island was a lot nicer than it was when I was a kid. It was built up. There were more stores and it wasn't as ghetto or dirty. The streets connected to the beach were crowded.

We walked in the sand, getting very close to the water. The women we were with couldn't figure out where to lay their sheet, but after they found a spot, we all sat down—stared at the water.

I did too, taking it all in. The seagulls flew like mad, the sand was hot, and the sun was shining. You could still hear the waves wash ashore within the sea of voices that filled the area.

It was nice.

When I was five years old, I remembered coming here with both of my parents. Dad and I rode the waves on a boogie board, and Mom watched from a beach chair. We ended the day with a Nathan's hot dog . . . It's sketchy, my memory, but that was the earliest one I recalled.

It was before my mother took off, leaving my father.

When I went to live with her after Dad died, she told me everything, why she left and didn't take me with her.

Don't get me wrong, my father gave me a great life, but it would have been better if he'd explained shit . . .

He had me thinking she was dead.

When in reality, she couldn't get used to his lifestyle, and my father wasn't going to let her take off with his kid.

If I wasn't in school, a babysitter was looking after me.

Actually, he used to pay Jasper's grandmother to watch me. We had many sleepovers, too. When I didn't spend the night at Jasper's, we had a housekeeper who'd double as a nanny for his late nights. There were plenty of those, but my father made up for it. He always had time for me.

But…if my mother's choices were: hang around to be a part of my life or have her freedom and never see me again…

I don't know. I guess I always thought mothers would grin and bear it—sacrifice their happiness for their kid's. That even though shit between my parents wasn't good, she would have at least stood around for me...her son.

Her taking me in . . . She acted as though it was a job, like she was my permanent babysitter.

Hey, maybe she never wanted to be a mother. She was crazy young—nineteen and eight years younger than my father—when she had me, married my pops.

"You're quiet." Alice poked my arm.

"Nothing to say." I grinned.

"You wanna beer?" she asked.

"Sure."

She handed me one from the cooler. "Drink it and then come swimming with me."

I smiled, sipping the cold liquid. "I'm not wearing a suit." I licked my lips. Her little tits were practically in my face.

"Wear your boxers—" she leaned back on her palms "—or are they briefs? Tighty whities…?" Alice pulled her shades down to wiggle her brows.

"Boxers," I said, looking to the Coors Light can in my hand. "No, thank you."

"I have a Jacuzzi . . . We could swim later . . . if you wanna come ova." She trailed her toe along my forearm.

I looked back to Alice, whispering, "I might take you up on that."

It had been an insanely long time, and I never looked a gift horse in the mouth . . .

Or, a woman willing to show me her . . . Jacuzzi.

She grinned, lying on her back and adjusting her sunglasses.

"Can I see those?" Bella pointed to my chest.

I turned down to my dog tags and then took them from around my neck. "Sure."

Bella grinned, reading them. "Edward Masino, Jr . . . Your birthday was last week?" she gasped.

"Yes, ma'am . . ."

"You're only twenty-two. I always thought you were older than Jasper," she said.

"Actually, he's a few months older than me." I shrugged. "How old are you again?"

"Eighteen . . . I'll be nineteen in September."

"You're lucky, Edward." Jake put his arm around Bella. "Just last month Alice was jailbait."

"I'm legal." She spat at him. "I'm eighteen," she told me.

I nodded. "I believe you . . ."

"Besides, the legal age of consent in New York is seventeen." Alice lifted her chin as she said that, proud.

Emmett laughed. "You should get that tattooed somewheres."

"Dude…" Jake slapped his hand to Em's.

"Why?" Alice asked. "I'm eighteen now."

Bella snorted. "Your taste for older men…?"

"Oh, yeah," Alice giggled. "Age is just a number." Her hand went to my arm again, but her eyes never left Bella. "Like you should talk—"

"Me...? Pssst." Bella shook her head, eyes focusing on me. "You're actually a little young for her taste, Edward."

"Bitch, I _know_ you just did not—"

To stop the tirade that was sure to come, I placed my hand on Alice's shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "Relax."

"There's no shame in my game's all I'm saying." She smiled and leaned back against my chest.

I went with it, wrapping my arm around her, and I noticed how tiny she truly was.

"Your eyes are so green."

"Thanks." I chuckled at the same time Bella whacked the side of Alice's thigh, making us both jump.

"What the fuck—" Alice went for her, but I held her in place.

"Thought I saw a bee," Bella giggled.

"I didn't see one." Jake yanked her ponytail and kissed her cheek.

I just stared at that motherfucker.

Loving gesture, fine, but Bella didn't look too happy.

"That hurt." Alice pouted. "I bet you could rub the sting out. Huh?" She placed my hand on her thigh.

Ironically, I only had eyes for Jake.

"You all right?" he asked me.

I laughed darkly, lifting Alice and placing her on the sheet next to me. "You wanna do this here?"

"Oh!" Emmett widened his arms and flapped them, like a giant bird, to get everyone's attention. "What the fuck?" It sounded like he was scolding all of us.

My chest heaved as I stared at Jake—by now I was just waiting for a reason to pounce on Bella's man.

"Can we all chill the fuck out?" Emmett asked.

Calming some, my gaze fell to Rosalie who took the sun and looked none the wiser.

"We cool?" Jake put his hand out to me, his tone humorous.

Alice actually saved the day, stealing my grasp and falling into my lap again. "We're all cool," she answered.

Silence fell upon us, and all I heard was Bella fiddling with my tags that she still had—a gentle clinks amongst other muted sounds in the distance.

"Anyone wanna swim?" Alice asked the crowd.

"No!" We all answered her.

Taking a much needed breath, I asked, "Were you three in the same class?" I gestured between all three of the girls.

"Rosalie's my cousin," Alice said. "She's your age."

Even then, Rosalie didn't feel the need to join the conversation.

"Oh." I turned back to the water.

"We got some shit to take care of later." Emmett hit my arm. "You should come . . . I'll present you to Carlisle."

"Present?" I asked as everyone else became very quiet again.

Of course, Alice broke the silence. "He's chillin' wit' me. You can totally meet my brother another time. My father's away on business . . . and my mother drinks herself to sleep at around ten . . . you can come by then." She grabbed my hand, and I definitely remembered her mom—Aunt May-May.

"I'm sure Edward would rather—" Bella started.

"I'm fine," I spoke for myself, yet I was still torn.

Hang out with Alice in a hot tub.

Or . . .

Meet Carlisle Colleoni Jr. again?

If he's who he's said to be, I can't exactly turn down the offer of meeting him. Even if I lived across the country for a few years, and then down south another four while traveling overseas, I still remembered a few key rules of the game.

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	6. Chapter 6

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA**

**Eh...close enough.**

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**I'm sick as a dog, miserable, so I'll update again later on. I need more sleep. xoxoxox**

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**Chapter Six**

Emmett chuckled. "Little one, he can meet with your brother and still meet you at ten."

"True," Alice mused, and they spoke about me like I wasn't here again.

"I'm going for a walk." I stood up, brushing the sand from my jeans.

"Oh!" Bella exclaimed, making to get up. However, Jake held her in place.

"You wanna take a walk with me?" I asked her, wishing that motherfucker would answer for her. Jake definitely rubbed me the wrong way, and I felt protective of Bella—happy to take on the role while Jasper wasn't present.

Bella shook her head, twirling my dog tags on her finger while Jake whispered some shit into her ear.

She started nodding along.

Alice jumped up, making her tits jiggle. "I'll come with." She turned to her friend. "And I'll take these." She grabbed my tags and placed them on her neck.

I felt like I was in high school all over again, and I was aching to leave the fucking beach.

This just wasn't my scene, and I was annoyed...

"You ready?" Alice asked.

I opened my mouth to protest, tell her I was leaving, but then I just nodded.

Even if I wanted some time alone, I linked my arm with Alice's, wanting to chill out and be a nice guy. Maybe I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning . . . or maybe the wrong side of the world since everything was so different.

We walked, and she talked my ear off. Mostly, she spoke about her family and how excited she was to be going to NYU in the fall. Alice expressed concerns about leaving home, since the neighborhood was all she'd ever known.

"It's lonely," I said, staring down at my feet. "You get used to it, and you're a short train ride away—forty-five minutes," I laughed. "How are your parents?"

"They're good." She nodded. "They're excited you came back. It's all my mom's been talking about the past few days."

I grinned, acute sadness filling me.

"You have a handsome smile."

"Thank you." I squeezed her hand. It was within my own now.

To be honest, I wasn't really into her. And the more I thought about it, the more I didn't think hooking up with Carlisle Colleoni's baby sister was a good idea, especially since I'd only hit it and run. And her family would get carried away, planning a wedding from the get . . . especially since our families were so close, once upon a time.

We had nothing in common. She was young, literally, and also in her mannerisms. "You're a sweet girl."

She beamed, resting her head on my arm. "Jasper's your best friend?"

"He is . . ." I nodded, looking out to the ocean. "We have a lot of catching up to do. I'm sure we don't really know each other anymore. He's chill…seems the same."

"He's nice . . . always gives me the cheesiest slice," she snorted as she laughed. "That totally rhymed."

I chuckled, too. "It did. Maybe he's into you." Okay, so I thought lying might get me out of dissing her. "He said he only gives the cuties the best slices."

"You think so?"

"Absolutely. He said that . . . about the cheese." Now, I was at a loss, and I didn't want to fuck up whatever groove Jasper had going—if he had any. "I bet he digs you."

"That's Bella's brother."

"So . . .?" I asked. "What's the big deal?"

"Nothing," she sighed. "I mean, it's Jasper...Do you really think he likes me?" She definitely reminded me of the chicks I went to high school with.

"Why, not? You're cute, funny . . ." I let go of her hand. "You feelin' him?"

"Gawd," she guffawed, "only since I was like seven. Bella didn't tell you?"

I shook my head, knowing Alice had spoken more than our whole group the entire time. "We should head back." She _was_ starting to annoy me for some reason. "Bet they miss us."

"You're not like the guys around here," she said, staring up at me. "No wonder Jasper's your best friend. He's different, too—smart, polite . . ." She frowned.

I touched her cheek. "Don't do that."

She grinned.

"That's better," I said.

"He thinks of me as like . . . a little sister, and he's always been afraid of my brother. You know what my brother said?" She never gave me a chance to respond. "If Jasper liked me, it wouldn't matter who he was . . . you know? I'd be more important than his fear. It's not like Carlisle goes after the guys I date. He don't care." She rambled.

"I'll let him know—"

"No!" she shrieked.

"Whoa." I put my hands up. "I won't . . . but if we hook up—" I waved a finger between us "—whatever shot you'd have with Jazz would be dead. He wouldn't go for you...ever. And, honestly, I'm not looking to settle down."

She nodded, calming down. "I have other cousins . . ." She tapped her chin. "They're older, total sluts, too. I'll hook you up, if you hook _me_ up."

Laughing, I shook my head.

"Come on . . . new guy in town, just got out of the Marines. You're hot. You smell nice. You're polite and honest. You have eyes the color of money..." She ticked off on her long red fingernails. "Trust me."

"Okay," I agreed. "Promise you won't break my buddy's heart?"

She squealed. "Like I'd ever. He's going places . . . A genius."

"Right."

With our arms linked, we joined the rest of the group again. During our walk, the sun had hid behind some clouds, making the sky overcast.

"Is it supposed to rain again? I thought it was going to be nice today," Bella complained.

"Who knows . . . let's just go," Jake said, and the rest agreed with them; meanwhile, I was content to stay. I'd make my own way back.

"You guys go ahead. I'll walk or take the bus."

"You sure?" Emmett asked. "We didn't even get the chance to chill . . . or talk."

"It's cool."

"We should get oysters from Nathan's," Alice said, turning to me. "Come with us, if you don't wanna go back so soon."

"I got diarrhea last time." Jake rubbed his stomach.

Bella laughed. "I did, too."

"Nasty." Jake kissed her cheek.

"Women shit, too!" That was the first thing Rosalie had said since we arrived.

"But I don't need to know about it," Jake told her.

"I'm good," I laughed. "I'll just—" I pointed, walking away from them. "Catch youse later?"

"Meet us at seven—the dry cleaners on Eighteenth Avenue," Emmett said.

"I will." I slapped my hand to his and took off by myself.

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	7. Chapter 7

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Seven**

_**W**_alking helped clear my mind. By the time I was a decent distance from the beach, I decided not to take the bus the rest of the way.

Mostly, I wondered if I could fill my father's shoes. The way I understood it, he used to be Carlisle Colleoni Sr.'s right-hand man—the second in command. Even if I didn't know how it all truly worked, I was interested, and I had lied to Jasper.

A huge part of me wanted that life—the glamour, the money, everything my father had before he was murdered. He left me a nice lump sum. When I left for Washington, Colleoni gave me a duffle bag full of cash that my mother burned through before I even turned fifteen, which was the main reason why I enlisted when I was right out of high school.

Still, what Colleoni gave me wasn't much, not in comparison to what my father was worth—the way we'd lived before his death.

Living with my mother, we had nothing.

Mom always liked her liquor and still enjoys drinking . . . I'm not sure if she was an alcoholic when she was with my father, but she was when I lived with her.

She was in hiding for so long, I spent three weeks with a foster family out in Queens before they found her.

_Resentment._

I had just a tiny bit of that when I thought of Carlisle Colleoni Sr.

If he and my father were so close, why didn't he look out for me better?

Why now?

Because he heard I was coming to town?

I didn't understand any of it.

My first step to getting my shit together was stopping at the AT&T store by Jazz's crib.

I was probably one of the last people on earth who didn't own a cell phone. The salesperson helped show me how to use it, and the first number I programed was my mother's, although I doubt I'd ever use it.

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	8. Chapter 8

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**Chapter Eight**

_**T**_he drizzling rain made me walk faster, and I took shelter at the pizzeria.

"Edward!" Jasper widened his arms. The place was completely empty, save two old men who shared a booth.

"Busy?" I asked.

"Nah . . . lunch crowd just cleared. We'll pick up in an hour or so." He came around the counter. "Wanna slice?"

"Sure."

He reached over, tearing one off a pie and then placed it on a paper plate.

"Best service in town," I commented, taking the pizza over to a booth.

"What'd you do today? You got a cell, finally?" He took the orange bag from my hands.

"Yup." I bit into the slice. Even if it was room temperature, it was still delicious. "They don't make pizza like this . . . anywhere." I had a mouthful.

"I've heard that . . ." Jazz went through the bag. "You got the new iPhone?"

I nodded, still stuffing my face. "Only a hundred bucks...but I had to sign a two-year contract."

"I have the same one . . . Want me to set it up? I have some hot apps."

I shrugged, chewing my food.

"What'd else you do?" he asked.

"Went to the beach," I said. "Bella and her boyfriend invited me . . . saw Em."

His face fell. "Oh . . . how was it?"

"Fine . . . nothing special." I leaned back, wiping my mouth with a napkin.

"Bella, Alice, and the mean one are attached at their hips." He studied the faux wood grain of the table.

"What's up?" I hit his arm. "Why did my going to the beach bother you?" It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out his behavior.

He raised his brows, his mouth open, but his words stuck. ". . . I don't know."

"It was no big deal." And then an idea came to mind. "I didn't hook up with Alice."

"Why not? Everyone else has." I didn't expect that answer.

"Wow, um . . ."

"I haven't, but I heard everyone else has," he whispered. "She's cute, but not worth the hassle—I adore her, though."

"Adore?" I asked, grinning from ear to ear. "Dude, you should talk to her."

"She's like family—it's not like that." He paused, taking off his apron. "How long until you ditch me to be with Jake and Emmett?"

"Be with?" I chuckled. "I'm not interested in either one of them. You're my guy." I leaned over to pinch his cheek.

He smacked my hand away. "You know what I mean."

I shrugged, shaking my head. "I don't know . . . If Emmett knows of a way I could make some money, I mean . . . I'm not 100% against that idea we spoke about last night . . . But Jake—"

"I knew it . . . Just know that I warned you, and . . . you can't stay at my crib anymore if you get mixed up with that."

"You're serious?"

"They sell drugs," he whispered. "They do that shit on the side . . . it's what they do besides working for Colleoni. Well, they sell it and kick up to him . . . how that whole thing goes. But Jake knows. When he comes by, when he's with my sister, he's clean, doesn't have anything on him."

I bent into him to whisper, "I'd never bring drugs into your house, nor would I sell them."

"Good," he said. "Just . . . I don't know. We need a day person. It pays eight dollars an hour, and you're already living rent-free. Consider it until . . . you decide what you want long-term. Because once you get involved in all that . . . there's no turning back." His eyes widened and he shut up. "Um . . ." Jasper shot out of the booth. "Hey, guys . . ."

I turned to see three males wearing suits. None of them looked familiar to me, but they all looked my way. They weren't old, and they weren't around my age either. He held up a finger to Jasper and silently walked to my table.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

"You're Masino's kid." It wasn't exactly a question.

"Who wants to know?"

He grinned, taking a seat. "Can I sit here? Good." He never waited for my answer. "I'm Carlisle—CJ."

I nodded, putting my hand out. "Nice to see you again."

He shook my hand in both of his. "I remember you."

"Same here. How have you been?"

"Good. I hoped Emmett would bring you by tonight . . . Didn't expect to see you here."

I didn't reply.

"My father told me you were moving back . . . told me to take care of you."

"How so?" I raised a brow, curious.

"We'll get there. For right now, just be easy . . . We'll talk again."

I stayed silent because I was never one of those guys who spoke just to do so—never had a problem with the quiet.

"Our fathers were best friends—business partners. You have an inheritance."

"I do?" Now that shit—money—I wanted to know about.

"My father's in Chicago . . . He'll be back Monday to speak to you, but if you need anything before then, come talk to me." He left the booth. "It was nice seeing you again." He patted my back and then walked over to the counter. "Send a pie to the dry cleaner's," he told Jazz before he left with his buddies.

My friend looked put out as he placed a whole pizza into the oven. "He thinks he can just boss everyone around."

"Not for nothing . . . Colleonis own this neighborhood," I laughed.

"Whatever . . . _you_ can bring it over."

I shrugged. "If you want me to . . . He said something about an inheritance."

"Wouldn't surprise me." Jazz leaned over the counter. "Do you have any idea what your father was worth alive?"

I rolled my eyes. "You sound so fascinated by this organized crime shit—you know so much about it, and yet you talk so much shit, too."

He turned away from me to fiddle with ovens and bullshit.

"No comment?" I asked.

"None," he said. "But I bet if your pops' was still alive, you'd be somebody."

"I _am_ . . . somebody." I scoffed.

"I meant with them." He jerked a thumb. "None of the H-pushing garbage or the heisting—a stick-up man. I mean . . ._ someone_."

"Maybe not . . . my father always preached about college, an education. I always did well in school. It just never interested me."

"What does interest you?"

I tilted my head, thinking. "Right now? Pussy. I'm thinking we need to get laid."

He laughed, placing the pie into the box. "Don't accept money for it. Just drop it off with the woman at the counter."

"Yes, sir." I grabbed it and walked out of the store.

The dry cleaner's was literally around the corner, and I got there in no time. A woman was at the counter just like Jazz said. She was older, middle-aged with a huge chest—her breasts were humongous. "This is for Mr. Colleoni." It was like a train wreck, and I kept catching myself staring down her blouse. I almost wanted to say, "Excuse me," knowing how rude I was being.

"Hello, dear," she greeted. "Are you new?" She leaned on her elbows, giving me more of a view.

"Um." I licked my bottom lip, laughing at myself. "Maybe . . . I haven't exactly figured that one out yet."

She winked. "You're a cutie."

"Thank you." I cleared my throat.

"I'm Irina." She didn't put her hand out for a shake.

"Edward." I pointed to myself.

"Nice meeting you."

"Same here." I nodded, while a phone rang.

"Just one second."

"Well—" I jerked a thumb out of the store, wanting to get out of there.

"Mr. Colleoni would like to see you."

My first instinct was to look up, and that's when I saw the cameras. "Okay."

Irina pushed the clothes that lined the rack behind her over to the side. "First door on your right."

Wary, I walked through the garments covered in plastic toward the back.

"Take this." She handed me the pizza.

Wordlessly, I took it from her, and the door she had pointed to opened. Going inside, it was just a modest-sized office space. There was a desk where Mr. Colleoni sat with those other two guys.

"What's up?" I nodded to the room.

"Come in . . . have a seat." He pointed to one.

I sat with the pie still in my hands.

"I'll take it." Someone took it from me.

"Thanks." I wiped my hands clean, wondering what I was doing here.

"Jazz wouldn't bring it over, huh?" Carlisle asked, looking amused.

I didn't answer, feigning no knowledge.

"He's . . . He's a close friend of yours?"

I nodded. "My only friend."

"Soon . . . you'll be a friend of ours." He waved a hand. "For now, though . . . Keep your distance from McCarty and Black. Don't roll with them unless I'm there. You dig? They're stupid—will only get you into trouble. You need anything—you come to me, like I said."

He stared at me, waiting for me to speak, but I had nothing to say. It doesn't pay to argue with a man like him—I knew the type, even if I didn't know _him_—and no one was going to tell me who I could or couldn't chill with.

"You don't talk much." That wasn't a question either. "Stay with Jasper . . . titty-fuck his sister—whatever you wanna do," he laughed with his friends, "Just stay away from those other two."

Now all three of them kept their eyes on me.

"This is Riley and that's Marcus," he introduced me, pointing to the two at his sides.

"Nice to meet you," I said.

They both jerked their chins my way, and then Carlisle demanded my attention again.

"You were a Marine…that's—that's some shit right there. I hear the training is brutal. What'd you do while you were enlisted?" he asked.

"Nothing big." I shrugged.

"Such as…?" He gestured for me to continue.

"Amphibious Warfare, logistics…special-ops."

"Amph—what'd'ju say?" he laughed.

"Ground Warfare." I smiled. "Logistics: Combat Service Support. I also trained others in armed and unarmed combat."

"Wow…So, you're trained in hand-to-hand combat. Awesome." He clapped. "I'd hate to be against you in a fight . . . You know how to use them big guns, too?"

I nodded.

"Whoa…nice." He raised his brows. "And you went overseas, right?"

I nodded, wondering how he knew that.

"How's your mom?"

"Fine, I guess. We don't talk." I leaned back in the chair.

He hummed. "By the relationship a man shares with his mother, you can tell how he'll treat a woman."

"Never had a relationship with my mother, or one with a woman," I laughed. "That shit isn't for me."

"You a _fanook_?" He smirked.

"Nope. I just never settled down in that way—_any_ way."

"You know…" He gave me a look. "We could have been like brothers in another life . . . You can trust me."

And when people say that, it usually means you can't.


	9. Chapter 9

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter Nine**

**_M_**other Nature couldn't make up her mind.

The day I arrived, clear skies hovered over the city.

The next, it was humid and overcast before it rained cats and dogs.

On my third morning, I woke up sticky—sweating to death.

The fan I had, which blew hot air, wasn't doing dick for me.

The first thing I did was shower just to wash the funk off.

And then . . .

Nothing.

With Jasper having gone to school and Bella nowhere to be seen, I was shit outta luck.

I had absolutely nothing to do.

In a guinea tee and a pair of jeans, I drank an ice-cold beer on the stoop—the coolest spot I could find.

Well, it _was_ until some dude down the block left his house to open the fire hydrant. The water sprayed—a low-budget sprinkler—for the kids. It made me smile as my father used to do the same on scorching summer days such as this.

After three beers and smoking many cigarettes, I went back inside. It wouldn't look right—a grown man hopping in front of the johnny pump to cool off, so I went in to take another shower.

To my surprise, I wasn't alone. Maybe she slept late or kept to herself, but when I'd gone to enter my bedroom, I saw Bella in there.

She'd made my bed; was tiptoeing around the room in her underwear while gazing about the small space—looking for something.

Careful not to get caught, I left the hall and made a lot more noise this time in the bathroom.

_Tidying up my room was a nice gesture, but what the fuck was she doing in there?_

I pondered such as I lathered up, and came to the only conclusion I could.

I bet she's just being nosy.

Hearing the gentle creak of the door give way, I was like, "Yo...?"

"It's me," Bella said.

"What—uh, I'm showering here..." I could see her shadow and her movements through the curtain—but only that—which meant she couldn't truly see me either.

"Relax. It's nothing I haven't seen before."

I stood still, waiting for her to leave. When the silence actually became awkward, because she was just standing there expectantly, I said the first thing that came to mind, "I didn't think anyone was home."

"Yeah—" Bella spoke through a yawn "—I just woke up." She stared for a moment before turning away. "I'm lazy. I know. I just want my toothbrush. I'll use the sink downstairs."

I poked my head around the shower curtain, curiosity getting the best of me. "Good morning...by the way."

Bella was still in her underwear, a short tank on top, and she wasn't wearing a bra. I was able to see _every_thing, and I looked away . . . Even though I only popped my head out to snag a peek in the first place.

_Just a peek._

I figured I could look...

_Just look._

It's funny. _I'm_ the one bathing, and _she_ looked more exposed—sinful, sexy as hell.

Nearly naked with messy hair, the faint trace of fading makeup around her eyes, which made them more pronounced.

Yeah, just a glance turned into a studying session, and I quickly hated myself for it.

_What was I doing?_

Bella sighed, arching her back while she stretched, granting me more of a view—revealing more of her skin since her shirt lifted from her stomach. "It's a _great_ morning...well, afternoon." She loaded some toothpaste onto her toothbrush.

"Definitely." I internally cringed, noticing and feeling my dick harden without having to look down to it.

Bella started to clean her teeth, smiling around the brush. "See ya." She waved, turning and leaving, but she left the door ajar.

When I knew she was gone—I noticed the water pressure change when she ran the faucet downstairs—I was fast to close the door, dry off, and get dressed.

A glutton for punishment, I sought her out. Bella was in the kitchen making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

"I could go for one of those," I commented.

"This is for you." She held up the sandwich wrapped in the paper towel, and I saw she had my tags around her neck.

I smiled. "No, you eat. I can make one." I went for the bread, glancing back to her. "Where'd you find those?" I'd sworn I'd lost them last night. This morning, I _knew_ they were in my top dresser drawer, though. Alice left the beach wearing them, but she used returning them as an opportunity to seek Jasper at the pizzeria. He brought 'em home with him last night.

She stepped closer to me. "But I made this one for you." Her eyes met mine shyly, or coyly. I couldn't tell.

"What's wrong with it?" I asked.

She laughed. "No foolin', Eddie. It's just...for you."

"Thank you." I gave my dog tags a gentle tug before taking the food from her. "Very thoughtful of you...but call me Edward."

"Edward." Bella beamed, sighing as she stared at me.

I bit into the sandwich, feeling . . . uncomfortable. "What's the deal for today? Got any plans?" I hopped up to sit on the counter.

She shook her head and then did the same, scooting onto the granite top. "It's too hot to do anything." Bella swung her legs, creating a drumbeat against the lower cabinets with her heels, toying with my shit around her neck.

I nodded, continuing to eat as I studied her thighs.

_They were a great focal point._

Bella jumped down and came toward me. She got between my legs and scooped some jelly off my undershirt. "You're a mess."

I winced, reaching for a washcloth.

"I got it." She leaned forward, licking it away. "It's still purple. If I put it in the wash now—" She reached for the hem of my shirt, about to take if off of me.

I used my finger to lift her chin. "What are you doing?"

She sucked her lower lip into her mouth. "Nothing." Her hands ran up my thighs. "You _want_ me to do something?" Her fingers crawled up my abs.

I chuckled nervously, gently moving her so I could leave the counter. "You think Jazz is at Sal's or—"

"He's at school for another hour today, and then he'll go straight to the pizzeria." She smiled, amused about something.

"What's funny?" I asked, throwing my last bite of food into the trash.

Needless to say—even more heated—I wasn't hungry anymore. My brain alerted my body to, uh, other wants and needs.

"Huh?" I waited for her answer, backing out of the kitchen.

She shook her head, content to stare at me.

I widened my arms. "What's up, Bella?" Because at this point, I didn't know whether to be flattered—if she found me attractive, too—or, or nothing.

I hoped she was just fucking with me, playing a silly game girls play. I didn't want to know if she was truly attracted to me.

Because if she was . . . that'd make her available.

And I didn't want that thought to enter my brain.

I didn't want to think about her in that manner...but I already did.

Bella grew up. Now she's beautiful with this bangin' body that's off-limits; meanwhile, she's parading around in her fucking underwear.

There's only so much I can take.

Lord knew, I wish certain obstacles weren't in my way or else it'd be the _other_ way around.

_I'd_ be the cat and _she'd_ be the mouse.

But that's not the reality we lived in.

The way she stared at me . . .

Fuck. I gawked at her the same way, only I don't believe I've been caught yet.

There was nothing we could do about...anything.

I had no idea who Bella was anymore. We'd obviously fallen out of touch, but my eyes—my fucking eyes and my stupid brain, my body.

They didn't give a fuck what Bella's hopes and dreams were. What her favorite color might be? What kind of music she listened to?

All I knew was that I legitimately cared about this crazy-beautiful girl, who I grew up with, in ways I couldn't explain, while I also wanted to hit her off—give it to her real good, fuck her like she'd never been fucked.

But she could be messing with me, being a tease. More than likely, she has no real interest beside making me feel uncomfortable.

"You okay?" she asked.

"Yeah," I bit out, nodding and placing my hands on my hips. "What's goin' on? Gimme a clue hea." A jittery mess, my agitation got the better of me.

Her cheeks flushed crimson. "You never lost your accent."

"No…I didn't."

She reached for my hand. "Let's sit…Tell me everything. What happened after you left?"

"There's not much to tell." I was honest, giving her hand a squeeze.

Bella frowned, her eyes on the floor. "Why won't you talk about it?"

"I don't know." I touched her cheek, which made the side of her mouth pull up. "It's not much of a story."

"I'd still like to hear it."

I nodded, not saying more as I turned on the faucet for a glass of water.

Bella was waiting for me to elaborate, but then she got the hint.

She started humming a familiar tune and emptying the dish drainer, putting plates away.

With her attention off of me, I was able to check out her legs that looked impossibly longer today.

_They would . . . since she was in underwear._

"What song is that?" I asked.

When someone knocked on the back door, I jumped and Bella dropped a bowl.

"You okay?" I asked her, trying to look into the backyard.

She munched on her thumbnail. "It's Jake—"

I nodded, going around her.

She stopped me. "Tell him I'm not home."

"He's probably seen you." I chuckled, and Jake knocked a few more times.

Bella winced, lifting her arms. "Pick me up." That was when I realized she was barefoot and porcelain littered the floor.

With ease, I left the kitchen with her in my arms. I brought her over to the upstairs landing, so she could hide.

Her legs wrapped around my torso. "This is convenient," she said.

And it was . . . her hot core blazed against my stomach it seemed, her floral, girl scent hitting my nose . . .

It was too fucking hot in this house to think, but before I knew it I was sporting a painful erection . . . again.

"Did'ju have a banana in your pocket?" Bella wiggled against me.

I smiled, waving a finger. "Be good." She was cute. Inappropriate but adorable.

Bella grinned, making like she was gonna bite my finger.

"Bells!" Jake hollered.

We both turned to the kitchen. "I'll be right back."

She ran her nails along my scalp. "Hurry."

When I pushed off the step, leaving her there, I had to blow out breath after breath and clear my throat—a flustered mess.

"What's up, man?" I opened the door for Jake.

He went to take a step, enter the house.

I blocked his entrance. "She ain't here."

He furrowed his brow. "Where'd she go? Without telling me?"

I shrugged. "Maybe she's with Alice?"

He adjusted his shades. "Tell her I came by."

"Will do." I backed up, letting the screen close as I watched him leave the yard.

"Did he look mad?" Bella squeezed my shoulder.

I turned to her. "What are you doing?"

She widened her arms. "Not a damn thing. I just didn't wanna hang out with him." Bella swayed her hips as she left the kitchen.

I knew because I watched her go.

That was when I realized how fucking horny I was—the extent of it, scoping Jasper's sister like that.

And Bella didn't make it easy.


	10. Chapter 10

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ten**

_**T**_he temperature didn't look like it was going to let up—at least while the sun was out.

And I took refuge on the stoop again.

"Is it clear?" Bella peeked out of the house, still looking scandalous.

I'd recently learned—_when I asked her to put clothes on_—that the panty-like shits she's wearing are actually something called boy shorts.

I mean, maybe they're truly for tiny dicks, or six-year-old motherfuckers.

_I don't know._

They didn't fit her, nor did they cover her ass.

"What are you hiding for?" I raised a brow.

"From Jake…but Mr. Softee is here." She was correct, that incessant song blaring, making the neighborhood children lose their shit.

"You want ice cream?" I asked, thinking I could go for some myself.

"A chocolate cone."

"You got it." I ran down the steps.

I got her chocolate and vanilla for myself.

Handing hers over, she pulled on my forearm. "Hang out with me."

"Uh…it's too stuffy in here." I held out her cone.

"What'd you get?" She got on her toes to look into my cup.

"Just vanilla."

She nodded, looking up at me. "Did you come back for…a reason? Or…?"

Taking a bite of my ice cream, I shrugged my shoulders.

"Lemme know when you know…" She placed her hand on my stomach, letting it linger as she walked away.

Once again, her advances went to my cock, and I wished they wouldn't.

_**/=/=/=/=/**_

_**T**_o earn my keep, I helped Bella bread chicken cutlets since she insisted on cooking dinner.

"You keep complaining about the heat..."

I felt her eyes on me, but I kept doing what I was doing.

"Weren't you in the Middle East for a while? Isn't it like ten times hotter there?"

Rather than get into dry-heat or humidity . . . and the difference, I smiled. "It was hot as fuck over there, too...I'd complain, but no one would listen."

"I can..." Bella puffed her cheeks, looking away from me. It was the first time she wasn't playing it cool—her little game. "I'll listen. What-whatever you wanna tell me. You know?"

I nodded. "I appreciate that. Thank you. That goes both ways." I thought I'd throw that out there, do Jasper a favor since he truly worries about her. I wouldn't know, but supposedly her behavior's off. She refuses to find a job or just doesn't want to. He's commented that she's had a hard time since their grandmother died. And the past couple of weeks since she's graduated from school, she's been even more withdrawn.

"You didn't only leave Jasper," she whispered. "Nothing was the same after you left. It was like-like you took a part of me with you."

Takan aback by that—her honesty and sincerity—I was speechless.

After spending the day with her, I was under the impression there wasn't much _to_ her.

Yeah, she had a body that she flaunted. And...all I saw was...what was right in front of me—a piece of ass.

Regardless, no one had ever said some shit like that to me, ever.

"It's not like I had a choice or wanted to leave." I cleared my throat, my fingers three times the size, covered in breadcrumb and egg goo. "You guys were my family...I—"

"You didn't call—You didn't even come back when Gram died."

"I'm sorry," I said, meaning that shit, but I was only apologetic because she seemed upset.

Sure, Grandma Cigno meant a lot to me.

But with losing my father, I guess nothing ever hurt as bad or as much; unfortunate things rolled off my back after that. They still do.

"I was away...I didn't know she died until I called Jasper last month." Grandma Cigno passed in her sleep of a massive heart attack a month into my second deployment, a year ago. I was honest, though; I didn't know until just recently. "I'd call Jazz every time I came back stateside, and then like once every month."

"I didn't know that," she whispered. "Sorry."

I ignored her apology. It wasn't necessary.

"I always asked Jazz about you . . . How long were you over there?" Her eyes shined with curiosity.

It was adorable to me, made me smile. "My first tour, with travel and everything, was eight months. This last one was a year—depends on where they send you, what you're doing—"

"I'm glad you weren't hurt." Her hand came back to my arm.

I nodded. "And look at you...all grown with a boyfriend, too." I managed not to check her out when I said that.

My words didn't make her smile, when I thought they would, her eyes were sort of emptying. "Me and Jake got together after Gram died...He got her this really nice floral arrangement."

"Cool." I didn't know what to say to that. "Is he a good guy, though? He treat you okay? Your brother worries about you."

Bella wore a blank face. "He worries too much. I'm fine...we're fine."

"Hey." I nudged her with my elbow. "You okay?"

"Jasper just needs to stop overstepping?"

"He's your brother. He's allowed—"

She spoke over me. "It gets on Jake's nerves and—" Her eyes came back to me, zeroing in on my hands, which brightened her face right up. "You're a mess," she laughed, coming at me with a towel.

"It's…" I was going to say it'd been a long time since I breaded anything.

But Jake came knocking at the door again.

Bella stood stock-still. "Um—"

"Want me to get rid of him?" I hoped.

"Please?" She brought her hands together like in prayer. "But be polite. I'll deal with him—"

"Fuck that. _Be polite_." That was hilarious. "What's his damage?" It ticked me off that he couldn't back up, let Bella breathe a little. "What's up with you two?"

"He's just being...a man," she whispered. "You know. You're a guy." She looked down to her bare feet.

I chuckled without humor. "That's not an answer...and we're not all the same."

Jake continued to knock.

"Be right there!" I hollered, making Bella hop back.

"Yo..." Messy hands be damned, I grabbed hers. "What was that?"

"He doesn't usually come by this often." She looked up to me smiling. "He really loves me. I mean, I don't know. I'm sorry." She rolled her eyes.

"Bella, baby, what are you apologizing for?" I asked, confused as fuck by now.

She shook her head and then ran up the stairs.

"Bella!" Jake shouted.

His voice instantly agitated me and I whipped around, stomping toward the door. "Yo…" I widened my arms. "What's good?"

"Where is she?" He fiddled with his cell phone.

I shrugged, wanting to deck him but deciding to play it cool. "I don't know. Why you asking me? That's _your_ girl, man." I stepped to him, staring down, fucking fuming. And I wanted to say something, wanted to bait him so I'd have a fucking reason.

_But did I really need one?_

"Did you want something from_ me_?" I smirked.

After all, what was he going to do? Both times, he'd stare hard and do nothing.

"Look, I'm just trying to see my girlfriend. Why you gotta come at me like this?"

I chuckled. "Come at you?" I left the house, letting the screen slam behind me.

Jake put his palms up. "Listen, bro—"

"I'm not your bro. She ain't here, and if you come here—yellin' and bangin' on doors again, I'mma bang on your fuckin' head." I cracked my knuckles. "Understand?"

"I meant no disrespect." He had a dull monotone, not meaning a word, but not wanting to take a swing at me either.

_Fuck. I wished he would . . ._

"You know when—"

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck_, I thought—and my insides were knotting with aggravation.

"—she'll be back?" he asked, trying to peer around me.

"No," I said. "Try calling first next time."

He scratched his nose with his thumb, his leg bouncing. "All right." He nodded. "All right." Jake turned, running down the steps.

When he was gone, I felt Bella behind me. "He looks pissed," she whispered.

"What game you playing?" I shouted.

She hopped back. "Why are you yelling—what'd I do?" All the sass she had disappeared, her head slightly ducking. "I-I'm—"

"You can talk to me." I blew out a breath. "You don't wanna talk to Jazz. Talk to me. What's the deal? You want this dude to step off? I'll let him know—make sure he doesn't bother you again."

Bella had no reply, pulling her tank top down to cover her stomach. She looked childlike in this moment, and I know...tits like that, an ass like that...all the attitude in the world don't make her a woman. In reality, she's still a confused kid just out of high school.

"Um...it's...I just...I didn't want him to ruin our afternoon." She nodded. "Yeah. He'd get mad—if he was here and _we_ were talking. Stupid jealousy, stuff like that." She shrugged, not giving me a real answer. At least, I didn't consider it a real answer.

"You love him?" I asked.

"I—" She left her mouth open for a long moment. "Why? Why do you wanna know?"

She obviously didn't, which I already knew.

Although I know nothing of the subject, I know chicks who love their dudes don't galavant naked in front of other ones . . . in boy shorts, no matter how immature. "He seems like a douchebag—that's why. You should get rid of him—"

"Why?"

I went for the kitchen. "Because you can do better."

"Have you ever been in love?" She kept her tone hushed.

"No." I turned the sink on to wash my hands. "Can't say I have. I hear it makes people do crazy things."

"You have no idea." Her eyes widened. "But it's love..."

I rolled my eyes. "It is what it is."

"I do crazy things sometimes." She sounded like such a little girl right now, and I thought it was cute—talking about love and shit.

"Like what?" I smiled.

"Like..." She fiddled with my tags, her gaze cast down.

"Can I have those back?" I laughed, pointing.

"Oh..."

Bella handed them over, and then we finished making dinner in silence. The quiet was welcomed, but her hands were not. Maybe Jake being at the door reminded her that she had a boyfriend.

But after a while...I think she forgot again.

She'd find excuses to touch me whenever she could, and…

It was getting to me.

Because...after a while...I forgot about Jasper. I started to forget all the reasons why us hooking up was wrong, only focusing on how good it felt when she'd touch me, when she'd be near...

_I needed to get laid._

When my friend finally came home, I was able to relax because he told Bella to put clothes on—real clothes that fit her—and she listened.

His presence ensured that Bella would stop her shit . . . only she didn't.

She'd continually do things to try and snag my attention—from rubbing ice along her chest, to bouncing around . . . I couldn't explain it.

She was sending me the vibes . . .

And she definitely had my attention.


	11. Chapter 11

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter Eleven**

_**W**_hen the alarm clock blared from the nightstand, I hopped up to turn it off. Then I slumped back into the mattress. The past few days have been pretty fucking boring. Jazz works and goes to school.

Bella hangs around with Jake.

Oh, yeah.

Since Bella played her disappearing act...

The next day he showed up mad early, so Bella had no excuse but to chill with him.

She answered the door and seemed happy enough to see him.

Yet, my best friend's baby sister still had a staring problem . . .

Even with Jake here...it just didn't stop.

She's always looking at me; my best bet has been to ignore her.

But she seems to be everywhere I am—much to Jake's dismay.

Bella's looking for a job, and it was going to be a long summer unless she found one. I didn't have a problem with her, as much as I had one with her man—who's always wherever she is now.

For someone who's said to be this tough-guy-hustler, he truly didn't do much and he was a giant pussy.

Then again, he could be around because I am, and he wants to keep an eye on his girl.

I wish he knew . . . I'd keep a good eye on Bella . . . I have been.

He's a piece-of-shit. I wished she'd just get rid of him already.

"You up?" Jazz came barging in, likely just home from school. He has class insanely early, and then he works afternoons and some nights. "Cool." He closed the door, and I heard him stomping down the hall.

Jasper had told me to take a few days for myself. I needed to get settled, but I was actually looking forward to starting work today.

It was a quarter after eleven. It wasn't that early but since I've been out of the service, I'm staying up late and sleeping later . . . Well, I've actually been staying up nights to read and get a little quiet, private time.

Then I sleep late . . . to avoid Bella—mainly Jake.

She waits around for me to wake up but only until around noon before she eventually goes to chill by Alice's pool with her boyfriend . . . where she keeps insisting I come hang out.

My new favorite thing to do is play with my iPhone. Jasper hooked me up to Facebook, and he added all these people we'd gone to school with to my friends list. It's kind of cool. I had no idea how many people remembered me.

I've been chatting a lot with this chick Jessica. We had the same homeroom in ninth grade, and she's still pretty cute. Whenever she messages me, I go look at her pictures . . . In every one she's puckering her lips and her tits are out.

I'm a pervert.

She wants to meet up tonight. Jasper was all for it, asked me to ask her if she had a friend for him.

As it turned out, her friend Lauren remembers Jazz and is excited to come out with us.

I have no idea what we'll do, but with us working the day shift, we'll be out by seven. We'll have plenty of time to get ready, although I have no idea what I'll wear . . . In all honesty, I don't have much besides jeans and Hanes white tees.

Heaving a heavy sigh, I left the bed to gather my toiletries and head to the bathroom.

And I hoped I'd get it in tonight with Jessica, needing to get laid.

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	12. Chapter 12

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Twelve**

Like every morning, the coffee was ready.

I peep Bella set it up every night before bed, and it's great fucking java.

"How can you drink it black?" Jasper shuddered.

I shrugged, actually savoring the taste. It was a little funky mixed with toothpaste, but it was all good. "You're not even drinking coffee…your drinking coffee-flavored half & half…with your half-ton of sugar."

"Morning!" Bella came traipsing into the kitchen, and there was pep in her step, more than there has been. She grabbed a mug and inserted herself between Jazz and me. "What's up?"

My friend and I looked to each other and shook our heads.

"Emmett just called me. He was able to pull some strings—got me a job at Gazebo. How cool is that?" She turned to her brother.

"Gazebo?" Jasper asked. "CJ's place? That club down on Fourth Avenue?"

"Uh-huh." Bella nodded, pouring herself some coffee. "I gotta go down there now to fill out the paperwork. I start tomorrow night, but it's only three nights a week. I'm glad. It won't kill my summer—"

"Emmett didn't pull strings," Jasper laughed.

"Carlisle…Emmett. What's the difference?" she asked, hand on her hip.

"What are you gonna be doing?" He spoke with his hands.

"Easy, killer." She snorted, smiling at me.

I sipped my coffee, refusing to get between their arguments.

"I'll be waitressing. The tips are supposedly…fuck. If I do well this summer, you won't have to worry about paying my tuition." She nodded. "'Cause I'll only work weekends come the fall, maybe pick up extra shifts…I don't know yet."

"I'd rather pay for it," he whispered. "You could come work at Sal's." He hit her arm. "You could work the counter, and Ed can deliver—"

"Don't call me Ed," I warned.

Jazz flipped me off, which made me chuckle.

"No fucking way. I am not spending my days in a hot-ass pizzeria. Not happening." She shook her head, fixing her coffee like Jazz does. "We need half & half." She made the carton dance before jotting it down on her grocery list on the fridge.

"I'll pick it up later," I offered.

"I don't like this," Jazz said.

"What's not to like? I'll make great money, and I'm sure I can get youse free drinks. Plus, CJ's always there. He owns the place. He'll look out for me."

"Carlisle...?" Jazz stared daggers at his sister. "You don't know what you're getting into—"

"Oh gawd…" she drawled. "You with your bullshit. He mentioned hooking you up, too." She gave her brother a nudge. "He needs people he can trust to do his books. He said that after you graduate, or even before, you can work for him. You're good with numbers, and their family owns how many places—"

Jasper wasn't trying to hear what she was saying. "We're gonna be late," he told me.

"Bet." I placed my mug in the sink and then went for the door.

Bella stopped me as Jasper went on ahead. "Now he'll be moody all day." She stepped closer.

I backed up a step. "Maybe he'll cheer up later. We have dates." And I only said that so maybe she'd stop…whatever she's doing.

"Dates?" She frowned. "What—"

"I gotta go." I touched her cheek and went for the door.

"Edward!"

I slumped my shoulders. "Yeah?"

"Who are youse goin' out with?" She folded her arms across her chest.

"You might not know them—"

"Try me." She had an attitude.

"What's it to you?" I leaned against the door.

Bella traced a tile with her toe. "Jasper and me, we look out for each other. He doesn't tell me anything anymore—just curious."

"I hear you don't tell him shit anymore either." Even if she can be annoying, I didn't like the frown that marred her pretty face. "Some chicks we went to school with—Jessica and Lauren."

"Those skanks?" she shouted, rapidly walking toward me. "Youse don't wanna go out with them. They're—"

"Loose?" I grinned.

She punched my arm, and she packed some heat.

"Jesus." I held my bicep, but it really didn't hurt.

She shook out her hand. "That wasn't my smartest move—"

"Edward! Let's go!" Jasper hollered from outside.

"I gotta go. Be good." I turned for the stairs.

"Be good." She spat. "I'm not ten years old anymore, Edward."

"I'll remember that." I ran down the stoop.

"They're total sluts—skanks!"

I turned, walking backward behind Jazz. "Maybe that's what we're looking for!"

Bella narrowed her eyes at me before disappearing into the house.

"Don't listen to her." Jasper placed his arm around my shoulders, ushering us down the street.

"They sluts, though?" I laughed.

He shrugged. "Who gives a fuck? She's just mad because Lauren used to be Jake's old girl. They have beef."

I nodded. "I don't want Jake's old girl—"

"No worries, my man. You got Jess eating outta ya hand already!" He approached the pizzeria. "And I have no qualms letting Lauren..." He rolled his eyes, getting his keys out.

"It's a given. Like that?" I snapped my fingers.

"With Lauren and Jess…it's always a given. Gimme a hand."

From there, I helped him get the gate open.


	13. Chapter 13

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Ahoy! I wanna give a Happy Birthday shout out to One of Eddie's girls! She was gracious to preread Tribute for me. Woot! So, Happy Birthday, bb!**

**She's also an author, and that's her pen name. Go check out her stories! one of eddie's girls.**

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**I know...I said I wasn't going to do this. But I just need to say one thing. Don't lose your faith in me. This is a slow burn! And it'll feel even slower since it's a drabble, but HANG IN THERE! I promise it'll be a ride, a journey, entertaining if nothing else. LOL. Please open your minds and have patience.**

**I'll be sure to post "warnings" when we're about to get hit with some dark stuff...or...intense crap. You guys get what I'm saying.**

**Chaps are anywhere between 300 words to 2K+ words.**

**Lastly, thank you so much to everyone who continues to read and review. I know this is different...it's not easy getting into something that veers off the usual fanfic course. But I promise - E & B WILL get their HEA!**

**Thank you and hang in there!**

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**Chapter Thirteen**

_**M**_y first day at the pizzeria proved to be a boring event. I cleaned seemingly everything a dozen times, heated up slices, served people sodas, continued to burn myself on the ovens . . .

Jasper said he was easing me into it. I wouldn't learn how to cook other things, or get orders ready to-go until tomorrow and the days after that.

Our boss, old man Ruffalo, was content to stay in the back all day—making pizza.

Overall, it was easy…simple. I didn't have to think too much, and that was pretty cool. Jasper's an awesome boss, too. We took breaks whenever we wanted and whatnot...

The pizza's free.

We had a great view of the avenue as chicks strolled by; some barely wearing a thing in the summer sun.

For a twenty-two year old dude, Sal's Pizzeria wasn't a bad gig.

Only drawback is making minimum wage, but I have some dough saved.

At six, Jessica sent me a text to see if we were still on for tonight, and I confirmed our date.

"Where should we go?" I asked Jasper, flicking my cigarette butt away from me.

We were outside, placing garbage bags in the dumpster, straightening up for the evening shift.

"Pool hall? Maybe the movies? It's a weekday . . . there's not much to do."

"What about the bowling alley?" My father used to take me bowling all the time. To be honest, I haven't bowled in years. It'd be fun...for me anyway.

"Bowling?" He grimaced. "Stinky-rental shoes...heavy balls so they can bitch when they screw up their nails. That'll get 'em hot."

"And playing pool will?" I quirked a brow.

"When was the last time you went on a date? When you were sixteen?" he laughed. "At least they have a bar at Status Cue—"

"As I recall, the bowling alley does, too." I nodded.

"No…" He walked past me to get inside. "I suck at bowling."

"Then just say that!" I shook my head, laughing.

"Look, we just gotta go somewhere there'll be booze. Get it in easier." He punched the air.

My fist met his. "All right."

"I'm not lookin' to be out all night. I got school."

I chuckled, about to put my apron back on.

But when we approached the counter, I was confronted with my past.

Standing there expectantly was Carlisle Colleoni Sr., and I guessed he was back from Chicago. His son was with him along with a few other dudes.


	14. Chapter 14

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter Fourteen**

"It's ironic seeing you here," Carlisle said.

"I could say the same." I walked around the counter to be respectful. "How are you?" He was obviously older than I remembered—in his fifties now—and his light brown hair was almost white, but he still looked good.

His spitting image, his son, put out his fist for a pound.

"What's up, man?" I pulled CJ in for a one-armed hug.

"Youse two are acquainted?" Senior asked.

I didn't say a word, but Junior nodded his head.

"This is wonderful." Senior clapped before pulling me into his arms. "It's great to see you, kid." His hands came up to palm my cheeks. "My God…You look—"

"Just like my dad." I smiled, although this reunion wasn't that sweet.

Inside, I . . . I don't know. I'd spent a lot of time being angry, a lot of time wondering what had gone down. Yet, being faced with someone I used to consider my uncle, I couldn't help but smile. It was surreal seeing him again.

"Esme's gonna shit a brick." He shook his head.

My heart rate skyrocketed. "Aunt May-May?" All I remembered was his sweet wife, who always had a little Alice with her . . . Christ. My memories of his family came flooding back now—most of all, Alice.

It was the weirdest fucking thing since Alice had kissed me under a mistletoe when I was nine and she was five . . .

Esme used to . . . She used to be like a mom to me. I remember being so disappointed when I found out my own mother was nothing like her.

"Call her that!" he exclaimed. "You'll make her cry."

"I—" I shook my head, as making his wife cry wasn't something I wanted to do.

"It'd make her day. That's all." He waved a hand but was quick to grab my face and kiss my cheek again. "I'm so happy you came back." He hugged me tight.

"Me too." I embraced him, yet now…some sadness kicked in.

In truth, I had all these questions—questions I was afraid to ask.

Most of them were about my father, but those other ones . . .

I wanted to know why he didn't take care of me.

Why he didn't adopt me if he and my father were so close, if Aunt May-May loved me like she always said she did . . .?

Why I had to stay with that Korean foster family for nearly a month, instead of them?

Why they eventually shipped me off to Washington?


	15. Chapter 15

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Fifteen**

_**M**_y friend surprised me by being warm and welcoming to Carlisle Colleoni Sr.

Maybe Jasper just has beef with Junior? I'd be sure to ask him later.

"Sir, come sit. Best seat in the house." Jasper led him to a booth.

"Join me." He gestured to the table.

I slid in and Jasper sat next to me.

His son and those goons—whoever the fuck—went outside to smoke their cigarettes or stand guard, fuck if I know.

"I knew you'd take care of him," Carlisle said to Jasper. "You've always been a good kid."

Jasper grinned. "He's my best friend." He placed his arm around me.

It was hot, so I pushed him off.

"Edward…" My eyes snapped to Carlisle's. "I'm sure you have a lot of questions?"

I just shrugged my shoulders, which was a total cop-out.

"Then I'll ask a few," he laughed. "How you doin'?"

"Can't complain," I said.

He reached into his jacket pocket. How he was wearing a suit in this heat was beyond me. "I got something for you—a few things." He pursed his lips, digging out a manila envelope. "It's shit your father wanted me to give you." He slid it over to me.

I raised a brow. "And what if I never came back to Bensonhurst?" I couldn't help asking that. After years of having nothing, and then learning I had something all along . . . after struggling, even when I lived with my mother.

He pointed to the envelope. "Your father set up a trust just in case something happened. He did it when you were a peanut and constantly added to it."

"How much?" Jazz started digging through the paperwork.

I let him do it, not excited just yet. "But…I'm twenty-two."

He nodded. "It's a long story. You want the short version? Your pops didn't want your mother to blow through it. You—only you—can access these funds, and it was accessible when you turned twenty-one. I tried contacting you last year on your birthday—" he chuckled "—but even with the strings I can pull . . . they refused to let me contact you."

"You've…known where I've been this whole time? Except while I was overseas?" It was a little heartbreaking to learn that.

He nodded. "You were in…?"

"Afghanistan," I whispered, my eyes never leaving his. It's not like I can tell anyone where I was exactly, what we were doing there, or what actually went down. "But I've been stateside for three months—"

"Look, you probably think I'm some crook. But that's not what's up. I can't touch what's in there." He pointed again.

My buddy had wide eyes and an open mouth, skimming through everything. "Ed…" he hit my arm "—you own a house."

"I—what?" I looked over Jasper's shoulder.

Carlisle showed me his palms. "_Aspettare_." He asked us to wait, grabbing for the contents in Jasper's hands. "A family of four lives there now—your old house." He nodded. "As soon as I heard you were back in Brooklyn, I had my son tell them to move. They have three months to find a place. It's fair, and there are two accounts in here. One, where your trust lies. The second one is where the rent is…All these years, I had it rented out. Minus expenses and taxes—we had to do minor repairs—there's some dough in that account."

"He's rich?" Jasper asked.

Carlisle chuckled. "It's a nice-sized loot for a kid his age. It'll get him started—"

"Ed, there's over two million dollars in your trust—"

"What?" I shouted. "No—"

"Yeah." Carlisle pursed his lips. "I spoke to my accountant and it's all set up for you. All you gotta do is call and activate your ATM cards...there are starter checkbooks in there, too."

"I thought only I could touch these accounts?" I asked. "With all due respect…" I didn't forget who I was sitting across from.

He smiled again. "I'm gonna enjoy getting to know you again."

I shook my head. While finding out I had all this money was amazing, I still wasn't as excited as Jasper. "I do have questions—"

"I'll answer them. You deserve to get whatever answers you seek. You should come by the house this week for dinner."

"Thank you," I said.

"Oh, and it's ironic you're here because you own this place, too." He waved a finger. "Ruffalo ran it for your pops, and he's been doing so ever since. Any profit—again, after expenses—is in the same account the rent is. And everything is on the up and up." He looked around. "Your pops made me promise that. All taxes have been paid, but everything is now in your name . . . It's up to you now to keep everything—the books, the whole nine—organized."

"I—I own this pizzeria?" I pointed to myself.

He snorted. "Back when you and this one used to rip the place off, you were really stealin' from your pops. Why ya think youse never got in trouble?" He laughed his ass off.

"I—" I never missed my father more than in this moment.

"Come on, kid. Think about it. Salvatore Masino, your grandfather, was one of the biggest loan sharks there was. He...acquired the joint as payment," Carlisle laughed. "Sal's your grandfather."

"He died when I was a baby...My father never told—"

"Why would he? Although, it should all be obvious to you now..." Carlisle sighed. "Back then, everything was coming in and outta hea. It's clean now. Plus, he kept to himself . . . I miss that fucker so much sometimes."

"Me too," I admitted.

"He told me eighteen was a little young for you to get cash like that." He pointed. "Now…now I trust you'll do the right thing. But if you plan to sell this place, you come to me. It's been in the neighborhood since I was a kid—when Ruffalo really owned it." He looked to the back. "He's the one who gambled it away."

"Oh…" I nodded.

"He still makes the best pizza in this neighborhood. Like I said, you wanna sell? You come to me; I'll buy it."

"I—" I had no thoughts about that at the moment.

"No way. We can run this place!" Jasper was getting excited. "Fuck me, man!"

Carlisle left the booth. "Gimme a hug. I gotta go." He acted as though no time had passed.

Jasper stood up and I followed, but then my friend cut me off. He pushed me aside to tackle-hug Colleoni. "Thank you, sir!" He kissed his cheek. "We won't let you down. Hey, did'ju wanna slice?" He backed off him.

Carlisle laughed, wiping his cheek. "Stick with this kid." He jerked his head in Jazz's direction. "I hear he's smart."

I shrugged, widening my arms for the embrace.

"Come see me soon. You hear me?" he whispered in my ear. "We got a lotta catching up to do. And Esme wants to see you." He patted my back and let go. "You got my number?"

"No." I took my cell out.

We exchanged numbers, and then he surprised me by saying, "Age differences aside…your father and I always hoped you and CJ would be like brothers. Don't be shy."

I just nodded.

"Lemme hear from you." He waved before he walked out.

Shocked by all the news I was granted, I sat back down in the booth.


	16. Chapter 16

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Sixteen**

_**J**_asper thought I was kidding when I said I wanted to keep my new fortune a secret. But trust me; I was quick to activate those ATM cards. If the bank was still open, I would have gone to pick out checkbooks.

"I'm serious. Don't tell anyone."

"Why the hell not?" he asked, disappointment coloring him.

"Just because." I ran up his stoop. "Look, I really appreciate you letting me stay here. We don't meet these chicks 'til ten..." I knew shops would be open until nine. "Let's hit the avenue." I nudged him. "I need some clothes."

He laughed. "What? Dude, let's go get you a brand new whip! Are you fucking kidding?" Jasper pulled on his hair. "Fuck. Let's go!" He ran away and down the street.

I chuckled as I sprinted to catch up to him.

Keeping my word, we had gone to a clothing shop first. Shit. I bought Jasper new clothes, too, as a thank you for letting me stay with him. He had no problem letting me spend money on him...after I insisted, and then I gave him two hundred dollars for letting me stay with him, feeding me.

As we walked back with all our purchases, we did pass Big Joey's car lot.

"Bro…" Jasper stopped me. "Come on."

I winced, still unsure, and as I turned my head, I saw we were standing in front of a jewelry store.

"Let's go in here first."

"What?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Your sister constantly steals my tags…"

I'd noticed she never wore a necklace. Maybe she didn't have any? I wanted to do the right thing. She does look out for me. Whether it's to tell me not to talk to certain people, make me coffee, cook for me, fucking serve me, or straighten up my room . . . I never asked her to do any of it. Especially that last one, but I think she wanted to snoop through my shit.

Nevertheless, I didn't complain or give a fuck.

I didn't have anything for her to go through.

Jasper shook his head. "Jewelry? For my sister?"

"It's not like that," I said. "It's a thank you."

"But jewelry? I mean...that's...it's too much. Get her a shirt or something."

"No." I was adamant, knowing Bella would love whatever I picked out. "A shirt? That's cheesy."

"Okay," he sighed, opening the door for me.

The salesguy came from around the counter, asking what we were looking for. I had no idea, but then my eyes fell on a nameplate.

Rose has one.

Alice has her name everywhere, but Bella doesn't.

And we always want what our friends have…I think.

As luck would have it, they had an Isabella nameplate.

"That's—that's too expensive," Jasper whispered.

"It's a steal," that salesguy said.

"You _would_ say that." Jasper snorted. "Listen, just—"

"I'll take it." I handed him the debit card. "Put it in a box or something."

"Solid white gold…fucking diamonds. Ed, she's gonna get the wrong impression. What are you gonna tell her?"

I shrugged. "We could tell her I found it?"

"Yeah, 'cause she'll believe that."

"Then you give it to her." I looked around some more, and a Cuban linked chain caught my eye. "Excuse me." I tapped the glass. "How much is that?"

"Oh…oh," Jasper laughed, throwing his head back. "You're goin' for the guido gold, huh?"

"Fuck you." I nudged him, smiling widely.

"Excellent choice, sir." He took the chain out to lay it across my palm.

"How much?" Jasper cut to the chase.

"Fifteen—"

"Thousand?" Jasper's eyes were bugging out of his head.

"Hundred." The guy gave him a shifty look.

I nodded. "I'll take it, but…" I just put it on and took off my tags to place them in my pocket.

When we were through in there, Jasper expressed his gratitude, and I wished he wouldn't. He opened his house up to me, got me a job—even though I now own that place. But the point is he didn't have to do any of that.

He welcomed me back with open arms.

It was genuine, and kind, and the…nicest thing anyone had ever done for me.

"You wanna make me really happy?" Jasper waggled his brows. "Let's go to Big Joey's."

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	17. Chapter 17

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Seventeen**

_**I**_ won't lie . . .

I was extremely happy my friend twisted my arm.

We'd be rolling in my brand new Charger tonight—it was black, shiny and sleek, and beautiful. We wouldn't have to take Jasper's beat-up Honda, which upped the chances of us getting laid.

All in all, I honestly hadn't put a dent in any account with all the shit I bought.

When we pulled in behind Jasper's car, Bella poked her head out the front door. "Whose car is that?"

Alice was right behind her, and she gasped. "No way!"

Jasper and I left the car, and I went into the trunk for all the bags.

"My dad must have met with you." Alice sidled up to me. "You went shopping? That's my thing. You should have told me."

"Uh…I didn't know." I slammed the trunk down.

"What'd you get?" she asked.

"Can ya let the man get inside first?" Jasper, like, snapped at her.

"Who you talkin' to like that?" Alice had the finger going, twirling her neck, her manicured nail in Jazz's face.

"Why do you always have to make everything a production? Ridiculous." he scoffed, leaving us.

"I can't believe he…" She turned to me, crestfallen.

I shrugged, having no idea where their exchange came from. "Let's go in. You can go through the bags."

"Cool." That cheered Alice up.

Bella was still in the doorway. "So, you're loaded now, huh?"

I quirked a brow. "Keep that to yourself."

Now it was her turn to frown.

I don't know what it is with these broads, or my effect on them, but Bella turned for the stairs. She ran right up.

"What'd I do?" I asked.

"Jake's being a dick," Alice whispered, "which seems to be something all men do." She sneered at me.

"Dude…" I widened my arms.

"Oh, I'm not mad at you…but you're a man." She looked me up and down and then went to Jasper. He was unloading his clothes from a bag.

I peeked at them before taking all my stuff upstairs.

We had an hour to meet those chicks, but I stopped in Bella's room first. "Can I come in?" Her door was open, and she was sitting on her windowsill.

"I guess."

Grinning, I was surprised to see it still looked the same—twin bed, pink walls. "I can't believe I remember your room."

"You've been here for days," she commented.

"Eh…it's _your_ room. I gathered you liked your privacy." I raised a brow. "Right? It's not like I'd come in here and snoop."

She studied her flip-flops. "I'm not a sneak. Messy beds…it's a pet peeve of mine."

"Okay." I looked to her unkempt bed before I sat on it.

"This—" She gestured to it.

"No worries," I sighed, digging out the nameplate. It was in a large, flat silver box. "I saw this…and I just wanted to say thank you." I handed it to her.

She furrowed her brow. "What's—"

"Just open it." I didn't want her making a big deal out of it.

She took the lid off, took one quick peek, and then went to hand it back. "I can't."

"You can—"

"Edward…I don't know what to say." Tears filled her eyes. "This is the nicest…the-the best gift. I—I—wow."

"It's nothing."

"It's something." She smiled, taking it out of the box. "Can you…?" She held it out.

"Sure." After grabbing it from her, I opened the clasp, as she turned around to lift her hair. Bella doing that made the scent of her shampoo hit my nose. It smelled incredible, and I leaned forward. "I'm glad you like it."

"I love it," she whispered, leaning back against my chest.

I beamed, fastening it around her neck.

She turned, her smile matching my own. "How does it look?" She placed her hand over it.

"Amazing." I nodded. "You—" My talking stopped when her chest hit my stomach. "Bella—"

"I see you watch me." She kept her tone down. "You give me this…" Her hands ran up my arms and around my neck.

I licked my lips, placing my hands on her forearms. "Sweetheart—"

"Hmmm?" Her nails ran along my scalp, her fingers weaving into my hair.

It felt fantastic, and now my cock was awake. "Stop." I took her arms from around me.

"What?" she giggled. "I didn't hear you." Bella grabbed onto my belt to pull me toward her.

My large frame didn't budge, but that just welcomed her to step closer.

"I mean it." I backed away from her, toward the door.

She bit her bottom lip, a coy smirk there. "It's on now."

"What is?" I was confused and flustered.

"Your game…I'm down to play."


	18. Chapter 18

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Long-ish one. It's a long day/night that will span quite a few chapters :-)**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighteen**

_**I**_ looked around myself, getting agitated. "Christ, Bella. I'm not playing a game . . . You're the one fucking with _me._ I don't know what's up with you." My words were but a whisper as I walked farther into her bedroom. "Jazz said you might get the wrong idea with this…" I gestured to the necklace.

"So…you don't like me?"

I shook my head. "I like you a lot…just not in that way."

Her eyes narrowed. "You're lying." Bella was...correct.

"I'm not," I lied, wanting to laugh at myself. "You're a sweet girl."

"You _say_ no, but...you can't keep your eyes off of me. You love it when I touch you." She trailed her fingers along my forearm.

I pulled away to stare at her for a long moment.

She knew...

Bella knew I wanted her, too, but can't she understand the impossibility?

Plus, I'm not looking to be wifed up.

If we fucked, that's all it'd be, and then living here after that...

_No. No. No._

"You're funny." I chuckled.

"How am I funny?" She was getting mad. "Tell me." Bella pouted for the briefest of seconds, and then she must have steeled her nerves—staring daggers at me. "I'm willing to—"

"Bella...Just stop what you're doing." I put my palm up, hoping I could level with her. "I notice everything…I know you dig me, but—"

"Psst…Dream on." That bitchy attitude was back, but it could have resurfaced so she could save face.

_I was cool with that_.

"Dig you...?" she asked. "I just _want_ you to, to—"

"To, what?" I called her on it to see if she could get the words out, to see if I could get the truth out of her.

"There's a difference—between liking someone and wanting to..." Bella was nervous—I could tell—yet she continued on with her act, getting bolder as the seconds ticked by. "I'm not a little girl any more…Eddie Spaghetti," she giggled, coming toward me again.

"Look—" I put my hands out to stop her.

She grabbed them. "I just want you…I mean, I'm _right_ here, literally under your nose—" her lust-filled gaze met my own, and her eyes expressed more than her need, yet they shined with an innocence. They were deep, too, a rich chocolate brown. Bella was close, and I could smell her sweet scent "—and I know _exactly_ what you need…Can _I_ be your slut tonight? No strings?"

"Shit." I spat, surprised. "What the fuck? Don't say that." My knuckle gently tapped her bottom lip, not liking Bella calling herself that at all.

She backed off to sit on her bed with a huff. "You spend your nights reading—"

"Besides the millions of other things wrong with—" I waved a finger between us "—you also have a boyfriend."

"I don't care," she whispered. "He's not you...you're, you're...Edward." Bella's voice broke, her eyes watery—her brave, slutty routine faltering.

Blowing out a breath, I took two steps to nudge her shoulder. "I'm a pig, okay? I could never be your man. I'm...you see me as Jasper's friend. This nice guy you grew up with," I laughed. "Meanwhile, I'm more than likely the kind of guy Gram warned you about. I'm young, too—not as young as you. But I'm not looking to settle down in that way. You deserve some dude who's going to treat you well and with the utmost respect, buy you flowers, do...boyfriend stuff...take you on dates, _work_ for the gold." I raised a brow, which made her crack a smile. "You're gorgeous...and I don't know how you are with other dudes..." I didn't want to get a big head, think I was special or anything. These days, some women are just as loose as most men. "Don't just...give it away. Make fuckers work for it." I nodded.

"You think—you think I hit on everyone?" Now the tears were threatening to spill over, and she looked to the ceiling to keep them at bay. "I don't. I'm not really a, a—I've never done this—" She stopped talking.

"I don't_ think_ that at all," I said. "All of which is why...I don't want you...to be my—" I paused for lack of a better word.

"Whore?" She sniffled, although she wasn't exactly crying.

"You're a good kid." I nodded and patted her back, and Bella seemed to be calming down some. "Trust me...you _don't_ want me."

At the end of the day, no matter how much I wanted _her_, I cared about her too much.

I just wanted her happy...

_Sans Jake._

"You're young—"

"You were ready to screw Alice, take the bait, and she's younger than me." She poked her chest.

"That's Alice," I whispered, hoping she'd understand my meaning—that Alice essentially _had no_ meaning, meant nothing to me. "I didn't chill with Alice, though. Did I? She's into your brother."

She scoffed. "All I'm saying is—"

"I get what you're saying." I massaged the back of my neck. "And it's a tempting offer…don't get me wrong." Nervously, I chuckled which actually pissed her off—fire flashing through her gaze.

But she had no idea what she was doing to me.

I have watched her—watched her watch me.

She had no idea just _how_ tempting her offer was.

Just _how much_ I wanted her.

Because…Bella was…Well, the only word I could come up with was perfect. She was gorgeous—fucking perfect.

Other broads I'd scoped in the neighborhood didn't compare—trust me.

But she . . .

I've been pushing everything she does out of my mind.

My willpower is astounding, surprising me, and she frustrates me to no end.

My eyes betray me because they always have this sneaky way of finding her, going back to her.

"You don't know what you're missing." She came to me again, getting on her toes, and that bold demeanor was back. "I understand what you need, too. I'd be cool with it...Trust me, Edward." Her hand glided down my stomach. "I'm a woman, and I know what I want...I want you to fuck me." She palmed my junk, and I almost jumped out of my skin. "Oh…you _are_ a big boy now. Huh?" She refused to let go of my hand. "Glad I could get a rise…"

Jittery, feeling as though I might explode, I backed away.

Bella smiled, still holding my hand. "You love it—"

"You're nuts." After snatching my paw back, I left her bedroom—I practically fucking ran.

Once again, Bella was correct.

I've actually grown to love that she chases me...in this...odd way. I like the attention she gives me. I mean, come on. It's a great feeling, being wanted and having this crazy-gorgeous chick—who could probably have any dude she wanted—constantly throwing herself at me.

Acting as though she's mine for the taking..._if_ I want her.

Another part of me, however, knows how young she is, knows all of this might be bullshit—she's teasing me.

I'm confused.

Bella plays little girl games, but I'm a man.

If she keeps coming at me . . . she'll get fucked.

And I often wonder if Bella might just be loose, or...

She said she isn't like that and I really don't believe she is, but actions speak louder.

Unless she truly lusts for _me_, has this uncontrollable urge—need—and feels the same way I do.

"You're no pig! Pigs don't say no, Boy Scout!" she shouted after me. "You're an asshole."

"Enjoy the necklace." I waved with my back to her, getting into my room.

"Asshole!"

"You're welcome!" I hollered.

Her door slammed, and then I closed mine.

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**Oh, don't be too hard on Bella. LOL. Some circumstances...aren't really what they seem. We'll hear from her soon enough!**


	19. Chapter 19

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Another long-ish one. Again, it's a long day/night that will span quite a few chapters :-)**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Nineteen**

_**T**_hose chicks were meeting up with each other beforehand, so all we had to do was pick them up at Jessica's.

Jasper and I looked great as we walked up to her stoop. They were already waiting, surprised we actually walked up to their door.

"Wow." Jessica looked up to me. Even in her very high-heels, she was still short. She barely came up to my shoulder. "You're not what I expected."

"Hello," I said, kinda at a loss. "You look great." I nodded, having seen her pictures.

Unlike Jessica, I've yet to put a picture on my Facebook profile. But what was more shocking was that she was willing to meet up with us based on a memory alone—of what I _used_ to look like.

"Thank you." She smiled, her eyes not leaving mine.

Jessica was cute…no Bella, but cute. She was petite, had Alice's small build; however, she was fucking stacked up top.

_I'd hit it._

Unfortunately for Jasper, Lauren was…She wasn't my brand of beer. That's for fucking sure. She was thin—a little too thin—and she wore too much makeup. Plus, she's a blonde.

While I'll check out any fine girl, I usually don't go for blondes.

I prefer brunettes . . . with pretty brown eyes and full yet thin lips.

Petite ones—not too short or too tall—who are stacked in the front and have mad junk in the trunk.

Okay, so I totally just described Bella.

_Fucking sue me._

I've been doing my best to get her off my mind for the past hour.

_No dice._

I thought seeing Jessica, maybe _focusing_ on Jessica, would make that happen. It just doesn't seem likely. Hopefully, with some more time, I'll be able to get Bella out of my head.

Only an hour had passed since we were talking in Bella's bedroom—since she was offering herself to me; meanwhile, it felt like an eternity since I'd seen her—Bella.

After I'd taken a quick shower to get ready, I peeped Alice traipsing into Bella's bedroom with a bottle of something. I didn't say anything to Jazz. But judging by the giggles I heard when we were leaving, they were probably getting drunk and gossiping tonight...doing whatever little broads who are too young for the clubs do.

I wanted to ask if Jake was coming over, but it's none of my business.

_Fuck me, man._

Because...who was I to deny her _and then_ be jealous of her man—that scumbag piece-of-shit? I'd be completely in the wrong, and it's not as though I can ask Jasper to inquire about it without him getting suspicious.

"Edward!" Lauren enveloped me in a hug. "You don't remember me?"

I shook my head. "Sorry."

"That's okay." She waved a hand. "And how are you?" she asked Jazz.

He nodded, clamming up. I could tell he was uncomfortable or shy, but I had no idea why. "I'm good." He cleared his throat.

"Is that your car, Eddie?" Jessica started for it, walking around me.

"Uh…no one calls me that anymore. It's Edward."

She ignored me.

I turned to my friend.

"Pool hall?" He raised a brow.

I nodded, using the remote to unlock the doors.

With my newfound wealth, tonight was my treat and we had a game plan. If things looked like they were going well, we'd hit up New Corners—a swanky Italian joint by Fort Hamilton Parkway.

If things weren't going well—and I could tell that they weren't already, based on my fucked brain alone—we'd head to the pool hall, where we'd be overdressed.

Earlier, I got Jazz and me new suits, although without the jackets, we'll look just fine at the pool hall.

Making a good impression on everyone my first week back was incredibly important to me.

"How about drinks at Gazebo?" Jessica asked from the backseat.

"That fucking place…" Jazz grumbled from beside me.

"Uh…" I didn't know what to say.

It'd been a while since I went on a date.

Whenever I was on leave—at whichever location—a bar was _the_ place to meet women.

And I don't know about Jasper . . .

But if things weren't going to pan out with these chicks, we'd be able to pick up other ones at a club or bar.

"Is that what you'd like to do?" I asked Jessica.

"Yeah, totally." She popped her gum, and from this angle in the rearview, I could see up that barely-there dress she wore. "It's the best club in Brooklyn. Plays the best music."

"All right." I glanced at Jazz as I drove along the avenue. "What's the big deal? We get a couple of drinks—"

"It's just not my scene. Bars and clubs, sure. Just not that one."

Since I didn't know what my scene was just yet, I was torn. "Well, whatta ya wanna do?" I whispered.

"We'll go. Fuck it."

Content with that, I gunned the gas to drive faster. It'd be a while before I could see what my new car could really do, but I enjoyed driving again all the same.

_**/=/=/=/=/**_

**_T_**he line to get into this club almost wrapped around the block. I guess since it's summer, there are more people out partying. The people waiting looked about our age, none too young or old, and there were some very nice-looking women in the crowd.

My eyes wandered as we all walked to the back of the line to wait. And my gaze got caught on this one chick who'd winked at me. She was this tall redhead, flanked by two busted babes, and she kept staring back at me.

"Go to the door. Give your name," Jasper told me.

"Me…?" I glanced at our dates. "Youse come hea a lot? Can you get us in?"

Jessica smiled, nestling into my side. "The line moves quick…I promise." She noticed Big Red grilling me because Jessica looked over her shoulder right at her.

I followed Jessica's line of sight, grinning and throwing that other shorty a chin jerk.

_That ginger chick was fine._

She might be just what I needed—not a brunette, not a huge fucking reminder.

"You know her?" Jessica asked.

"Nope," I sighed, leaning to whisper in Jasper's ear, "You think my name will be at the door?"

My attention was taken from Jazz when my date got on her toes, weaving her fingers into my hair. "Kiss me, Eddie," she whispered, staring into my eyes.

I smirked, dipping low, hoping that doing so would somehow erase my memory.

What I didn't expect was for her to…attack my face? Our lip-lock was nothing I'd have written home about, but I went with it, getting a good grasp on her ass.

And I definitely tasted booze . . . the gum barely masked it.

Were they fucking drunk already? Maybe that's why they acted...the way they did.

"Woo!" Jasper patted my back. "That was hot."

"It was?" I quirked a brow, wiping her lipstick away from my mouth.

"Go to the door," he whispered.

"I'll be right back," I told Jessica.

"You're leaving me?" She jutted her lower lip out, frowning, a bit wobbly on her feet now—still holding my hand.

"Two seconds…" I held up two fingers.

Bella gets away with it—the pouting—because she's Bella. I actually enjoy soothing Bella—wiping her tears if there are any, calming her down, being there for her, trying to make her feel good about herself, defending and protecting her.

As far back as I could remember, I'd always done all those things for her—look out for her well-being.

_Now...?_

I get some sort of satisfaction from taking care of her in those ways . . . even babying her.

_Fuck_.

I cringed at the fact that I was thinking about Bella again as I left the line.

I swore I wouldn't think about her again. I was on a mission to get laid tonight.

_Bella. Bella. Bella._

_I just had to get that out._

_Now, I'd be cool._

But back to my original point . . . I don't do that whiny-chick shit—the pouting, trying to be overly cute by acting like a child. It's annoying and highly unnecessary to me.

If you're a woman, fucking carry yourself like one.

Both of which are a total contradiction.

_Carry yourself like a lady but give up the pussy like a whore . . ._

I laughed at myself as I approached the entrance . . . 'cause that's exactly what I'm looking for tonight.

Three large bouncers stood in front of the door. "Can I help you?" one asked.

"I'm here to see Carlisle Colleoni?"

"Name?" He looked down to his list.

"Edward Masino…and guests." I shrugged.

"One moment." He turned his head and used a walkie-talkie, whispering into it.

I looked back down the line to widen my eyes at Jazz.

"Come in…" He opened the velvet rope. "Have a good time."

"Thanks." I was taken aback. "Let's go!" I waved a hand so they could follow me.

We bypassed metal detectors. The bouncers never stopped us or got us with a wand. The four of us were welcomed inside, and it was jam-packed with bodies. I thought we should get a table, yet Jessica's song was on.

She and Lauren went to the dance floor, while Jasper and I went to get us all some drinks.

"You dance?" Jazz asked.

"Nah…you?"

He shook his head.

"You made it!" I heard someone and felt a hand on my shoulder.

I whipped around, facing Carlisle Jr. "What's up?" I slapped my hand to his.

"Nothing." He looked around. "Who youse hea with?"

"Uh…my boy Jazz, and…" I peered about for those chicks, trying to point them out. "Jessica and Lauren." They were staring back at us, grinding against each other.

"Jessica _and_ Lauren—common names—but that pair is known, uh, very well around here." Carlisle chuckled, looking to the dance floor. "Don't let those two drink too much—I had to kick their asses out last week."

"Oh…" I nodded. "Thank you for letting me know that."

"You were in the service a while…bet it's been an age since you had your shit greased. Huh?" He stared at the bartender. "These two are my guests—drinks on the house."

"It's cool," I was fast to say. "There's no need—"

"Oh…_paesan_, we're family!" He hugged me again and then insisted we give the bartender our orders.

The bartender served us just in time for Jessica and Lauren to come back. They grabbed their drinks and then went to dance again.

To be honest, I kind of insisted they do so, told them to have fun—that Jazz and I would be here when they were ready to chill.

I don't fucking know.

"Anything you want tonight—if I can get it, you can have it," Carlisle said, placing his arm over my shoulders. "I want you to have a good time."

I patted his back. "Thanks. Good lookin' out, Carlisle. I appreciate it."

"Call me CJ."

I nodded. "If there's ever anything…"

And there it was . . . that was likely the moment Junior had been waiting for.

"I'll remember that." He sipped his drink. "What about G.I Jane cooz? Those military broads? They don't put out?"

I threw my head back and laughed, wondering why he was so concerned with my sex life. "There's...I mean, yeah, it happens." I shrugged. "You're overseas, lonely, but there's no privacy." There weren't many females in my unit at all, and most of them were married.

Stateside, where I was home-based, was a different story. There were a lot more women—ones who weren't married—at Camp Lejeune. We'd all party hearty, men and women. We'd fraternize and have a good time, when we were off-duty yet on the base.

There was this cute Baby G—Brigadier General—who used to flirt with me relentlessly. Alas, she was married and above my pay grade, which made me feel uncomfortable. She sticks out in my mind as someone who was always . . . offering.

Truth be told, I never saw a difference—between women in the military and civilian broads.

It was what it was—my hookup status didn't change or worsen by being enlisted. Jasper thinks I got so much play being a Marine, but that's all I'd ever been.

And when everyone around you is a Marine, you're not that special.

No women just dropped their drawers for me.

CJ raised a brow in understanding. "You comin' to dinner tomorrow night?"

"Your father didn't get to that—"

"Come tomorrow. My parents' at like six?" He smiled. "We'll talk, eat…My mother makes too much fucking food, and she'll _make_ ya eat! But it'll be a good time. Isabella's always welcome, but bring Jasper…" He turned to look at the dance floor.

Following his line of sight, CJ stared at our dates. "Just leave those pigs wherever the fuck." He chuckled. "Don't bring them to my parents' house."

"I wouldn't," I laughed.

"Christie!" He called someone over with his hand. "C'mere!" He turned back with his arm around a woman, his eyes meeting mine. "This is my friend, Christie."

She was tall, a leggy brunette with long and curly hair. She looked to be in her mid to late twenties, had a pretty face. Her shoulders were bare and sun-kissed, a tiny red dress sheathing her curvaceous body.

"This is Edward…and Jasper." He hit Jazz's shoulder.

"It's nice to meet you." She shook my hand.

"Likewise." I winked.

"Who you hea with tonight?" CJ asked her.

"Just Ang and Lisa," she said, looking over her shoulder.

"Bet…Introduce them to my boys." He jerked his head.

Christie smiled and pecked CJ's cheek before she left to get her friends.

"Whoa!" Jasper stared after her. "She's—"

"Hot." I finished for him.

"Eh…just a different_ brand_ of pig…they're classy. Your broads are about to get white girl drunk in about twenty minutes." CJ cackled.

"Like I give a fuck." Jasper drank his rum and Coke. "It just doesn't matter at this point."

I grinned, watching him stare from Lauren over to Christie and her friends. "Uh, Jazz…?" My friend had been rude to CJ—who I don't have a real opinion of yet—and he was being nice to us, hooking us up with the booze and the chicks. CJ didn't have to do any of it.

"Thanks, man," Jazz told him. "Thanks for letting Bells work here, too." He didn't mean it at all—has no intention of letting his sister work here—but Jazz thanked him nonetheless.

Shit.

Taking a closer look around, seeing the waitress uniform—black booty shorts and a tight black shirt that shows off the stomach—I didn't want Bella working here either.

It's because I wanna lookout for her, that's why.

. . . Keep Bella away from all the drunk, scoundrel men that'll fucking leer and shit.

_Fuck._

I stiffened, cringing for a brief moment.

Thank God, no one noticed.

"Isabella," CJ sighed. "She's—she's grown up. Hasn't she?"

"And your tone isn't lost on me." Jasper came around me to stand.

"Easy." I pulled him back.

Maybe Jasper didn't notice, but once he moved, a few of Carlisle's goons from around the club moved, too.

"Come on, dude. That's his sister." I felt a certain way along with my friend, instantly aggravated.

"A beautiful girl." CJ nodded. "That's all I was sayin' . . . Slow your roll." He patted Jasper's back. "Listen, she's a little sweetie. That's all . . . I also know you're a good kid—" He winked at me, and then he walked paces away with Jasper under his arm while whispering in his ear.

Once again, I was torn.

Christie and her friends were coming toward us, and our dates were still dancing.

I guzzled my drink, quick to ask for another, hoping the alcohol would free my mind . . . and other things.

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**Please leave me your thoughts.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty**

Five minutes later, halfway into my third drink, that dude Riley approached me by the bar.

By that time, Christie and her friends had already joined me, so we'd all headed to the table Riley brought us to. It was cool, almost as though I was being treated like a celebrity.

And Jasper was still talking to Carlisle.

Every once in a while, I'd look his way to make sure he was okay. He was fine, and there was a lot of nodding going on. Maybe they'd settle their differences, whatever they may be?

Regardless, I sat in a large booth with two beautiful women under my arms . . . a bottle of champagne chilling, and a couple other bottles on the table.

It was surreal.

Not so long ago, I was in the dessert, the barracks at Camp Dwyer just trying to avoid being blown apart at all costs.

And here I was now . . . a place that I always considered my real home.

Life is funny sometimes.

Because everything didn't feel as good as it should have.

I tried to enjoy myself anyway.

"You're a good friend of CJ's?" Christie asked.

I tilted my head toward her to be attentive, stuck for an answer.

"We're like brothers." The man himself came to join us, and Jazz had also taken a seat next to him.

"That's cool." Christie ran her hand up my chest.

I didn't reply or say anything, content to sit with my booze and the ladies, listening to the music.

"You dance?" CJ asked, loosening his tie.

"No," I answered.

"Me neither." He scrunched his nose. "OH!" CJ widened his arms, shouting out to someone. "C'mere, sweetheart!"

I couldn't see who he was talking to, nor did I care. My attention went to Jazz. "You cool?" I practically mouthed across the table.

He bobbed his head, sipping his drink and placing an arm over Angela's shoulders.

And I was curious as to what they spoke about—what had Jasper suddenly at ease.

"We should get out of here," Christie whispered in my ear.

I turned to her, smirking and gazing into her brown eyes, our mouths barely an inch apart.

She had to be kidding me, right? Especially if she thought I wouldn't leave with her. This was the moment I'd been waiting for.

"Baby…?" she prompted, fisting two handfuls of my hair.

I was hypnotized by the scent of her perfume, the warmth that radiated off of her, having a woman I could have in my arms, so close . . .

Where was I going to take her?

We couldn't go to Jasper's. Maybe it was okay for him. Bella doesn't give a shit about what he does.

Maybe I don't know a lot about women, but I knew there'd be problems if I brought a broad back.

And I wouldn't bring a chick home with me even if Bella didn't care.

It'd be disrespectful to her either way.

Christ.

I need my own place—so I could do what I wanted and put some space between Bella and me.

That'd probably solve problems such as these, and I wouldn't be living down the hall from my personal temptress.

Bella. Bella. Bella.

Pretty young thing with the perfect ass, perfect body.

Three months . . .

In a few months, my old house will be ready for me to move into.

Needing to get my mind right, I palmed Christie's cheek, pushing her soft hair away from her face. "Can we go to your place?"

"I'm sorry. No." She frowned. "I live with my parents."

I nodded, pursing my lips and catching Jasper's eyes. From the looks of it, he'd also been propositioned by Angela—Christie's friend—who he'd been making out with for the past five minutes.

He'd definitely get it in...the way she was pawing at him.

Angela couldn't keep her hands off of Jasper.

I was happy for him.

"This is Carmen," CJ told me, pointing to the little boo-boo who sat in his lap. "This is Edward and Jasper, and you know Christie and them..." She must have been who he was calling over before. Carmen was cute, this thick little Spanish chick.

"Nice to meet you," I said.

She gave me a nod of acknowledgement as she sipped her drink.

"I'm getting impatient," Christie whispered in my ear. She also started to undo my pants. "This okay?" She scraped her teeth along my jaw, going to my ear and nipping my lobe.

My cock had been on snooze, but it was awake now.

I cleared my throat, sitting up a little and stopping her hands. "Not here, sweetheart. We'll go somewhere. Lemme think for a second." My nose nuzzled her neck, inhaling her perfume-y scent. She smelled wonderful.

I had to figure this out.

"You know any hotels in the area?" I asked her.

She grinned, pulling at her dress, and I think she was trying to get me to look down at her cleavage. Little did she know, I had been. "Yeah...I know one."

"Okay." I sipped my drink, thirsty as fuck.

"You guys wanna head out?" CJ hollered. "We can have our own little party and catch up?"

"That sounds awesome," Lisa said, pulling my attention away from Christie. She grabbed my jaw to gaze into my eyes. "You're a Marine, huh?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I was."

"That's so hot." Lisa nestled into my side to kiss along my neck, rub her huge tits on me.

"Party at CJ's," Christie giggled, and then I swore my heart stopped.

Christie and Lisa leaned toward each other. They were inches from my face when they started kissing, but I wasn't forgotten. Their hands were ghosting along my thighs, and my hands came up to the base of their necks—encouraging and weaving my fingers into their soft hair.

"Oh!" CJ shouted. "Masino for the win!"

I hissed, playing with their hair as the two chicks continued to kiss. They were drunk. I had no idea how long they'd been partying before we got here, but they seemed...well enough, aware.

"You down to party or what?" CJ asked. "I got a place not too far from here...plenty of space." He raised a brow, and I knew what he was saying.

We'd have privacy.

And I couldn't think of anything better to clear my mind...scoring with...not one, but two chicks, who'd fuck with each other as well.

A fucking threesome.

How'd I ever get this lucky?

I should say a prayer later.

Christie and Lisa pulled away from each other, smiling and giggling, and they kept going back for these short, cutesy nips.

"I'm down." I nodded, and I was sporting the only fucking hard-on.

Jasper finished his drink. "Yeah, let's go." My buddy was anxious, grasping Angela's hand, making to leave the booth.

CJ clapped. "Let's go." He helped Carmen get to her feet, and then his phone must have rang.

I couldn't hear it, but he took his cell out of his jacket.

He put up a finger, as we trailed out of the booth, indicating we wait.

"Oh, is this for me?" Christie rubbed me over my slacks.

I laughed, knocking her hand away, waiting because I didn't know where we were headed.

CJ had turned from us—talking on his phone—before all hell broke loose.


	21. Chapter 21

**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-One**

**BELLA POV**

"Can you believe they went out with those skanks?" I was beside myself, angry and enraged. "Lauren thinks she can just—"

"Jessica's a bigger slut." Alice tilted her bottle back. We were drinking peach schnapps, the only thing she could snag from her father's liquor cabinet.

"Which one do you think Edward will hook up with?" I asked, taking the bottle from her.

Alice groaned, getting to her feet. "My question is…Why do you care?" She whipped toward me. "I mean, that day at the beach. You were acting all…like I stole your man or something. You're with Jake. And Edward," she sighed, "he's fair game. But I don't wanna fight with you." She pouted, sitting back down.

I groaned, covering my face with a pillow. "Have you seen Edward?"

Little did she know, the crush I have on Edward goes back to when I was practically in diapers. He's always been different. Even when I was young and Jazz would tease me, Edward would be there to soothe me. He'd tell me I was pretty when the other boys would call me ugly.

He said that one day I'd be a knockout, and then all the boys would like me.

He always made me feel better, but we were closer back then.

Even when I was eight and he was twelve, I'd chase after him. I don't think he ever noticed, but I used to follow them everywhere.

And that lasted until he left at fourteen.

One time, I kissed his cheek. He didn't wipe at his face or scream about how gross I was, like Jasper would. Edward just smiled and said thank you.

He always had manners.

Then again, his dad was a legend around here, and I'm sure he instilled values in his son.

Respected by many, feared by most, Edward Masino Sr., Edward's father, ran this neighborhood with Colleoni. It's no secret. If his father was still alive, Edward would be who Alice's brother is—a go-to guy around the way—a neighborhood capo.

Sadly, he's no one now.

I knew that once things were settled, Edward would come into his own.

I've watched him, studied him is more like it. I know everything he does, and maybe that makes me a creepy stalker, but I didn't give a shit.

He seems lost…

Although I want him—really badly—all I really wanna do is hold him and tell him everything will be okay.

He's home now.

For years—every year and every few months—I'd ask Jasper how Edward was doing.

I never forgot about him.

Yet, he treats me like I'm still a kid.

He also checks me out every chance he has . . .

His mouth says one thing while his eyes and body say something completely different.

I'm confused, getting mixed signals.

After years of living with Jasper, I know how some guys think, and Edward flat out told me.

He wants and/or needs to get laid.

And I was willing to be anything he wanted . . . needed.

Because, overall, I needed him—to be with him.

I wanted him...

Even if I'd only have him for one night.

I'd be happy for one night, and I'll genuinely smile for days after . . . It'd be something, a memory I could cherish and hold.

After having made love to a real man, being with Edward.

I've been acting on it, going for it, because I had to.

I felt like it was now or never—since there probably won't be too many opportunities in the future.

Now it's looking closer to never.

"You know the saying, 'Bros before Hoes'? Do you think Edward's gonna go for Jasper's sister? I don't know." Alice plopped onto my bed. "I've spoken to CJ…and I know you don't care about my feelings for Jasper—"

I screamed into my pillow, because of how selfish she was being. "This is about me!"

"Ay!" She waved her fist at me. "I'm in no mood."

"Shut up." I scoffed, guzzling the schnapps. "What am I gonna do?" My head was already beginning to fog, and I enjoyed the buzz.

"Make a move," she gasped; Alice has no clue as to what I've been doing. "Sneak into bed with him?"

I raised a brow. "Tonight? After he fucks some slut?"

It wasn't the worst idea. I'd just never admit I was that desperate to do it.

"Regardless, you can't be angry at what he does…He's not your man. In fact, your man is on his way here."

"Fuck." I forgot that Jake was coming by. "I don't know what to do about Jake." I hung my head, hugging my pillow close to me. "He's crazy. If he sees me with Edward—"

"He'd kill him," Alice whispered. "Edward's not with a crew...Jake runs with CJ...maybe not directly, but CJ and all the guys would have Jake's back. Edward's like the new guy. He is the new guy, no matter if he was born here. Jasper would be behind Edward..." Her gaze met mine. "You gotta think about your brother. He could get hurt, too." She frowned. "I don't know what to tell you. If Jake sees you, or even suspects that you and Edward—"

I cringed. "I'm literally and totally fucked."

"You're drunk, too." She snorted. "Going for Edward, starting all that trouble . . . It's not worth it. Edward will never be your boyfriend. Going after him for a fuck and then all the crap that'd happen after...it's petty and dumb."

"Maybe not just a fuck." I palmed my throat, holding back a burp, and I felt my new necklace. "This means something. You don't just give something this expensive to—"

"He's classy." She smiled. "Like real classy, like a man. Not like these boys we chill wit' who pretend to be men...thugs." She nodded, puckering her lips. "We should go out. You ditch Jake—don't even tell him. We'll leave for Gazebo before he even gets here. You need to have fun—get Edward and Jake outta your head."

"I—" I had a feeling that my going to Gazebo, ditching Jake, would just piss him off more. I'd lied the other day, and Alice covered for me. I don't have a cell phone, and Alice said I was helping her rearrange her bedroom furniture. He believed the lie, but... "I can't." My stomach tied in knots.

"My brother always lets us in." Alice shook my arms.

"Jake—"

"He won't say anything if you're with CJ and me. You know that. My brother will son him faster than...I don't know what," she giggled. "You'll get away with it. I promise. We'll just dance and have a good time until Jake calls to meet up with us, 'cause you know he will. Remember what a good time is?" She grinned. "We used to have fun..."

"Yeah," I sighed. "I don't know what's wrong with me lately."

I've always pretended to be happy when I wasn't—especially recently with dating Jake, so no one would be the wiser—I try to smile whenever I'm around Jasper, too, so he doesn't worry.

After I graduated but before Edward arrived, things got even worse for me.

I was having a hard time just getting out of bed—doing normal human things—while also dealing with this high level of anxiety.

I'd be in a constant state of despair I couldn't explain.

Jake was the biggest reason why I was like that—because I'm trapped—but I'm used to him now, all that stuff.

I still feel sad, even more so now. I'm caged by my boyfriend while craving, wanting, and needing another man's arms...having Edward so close yet so far away, having what I've always wanted and longed for within reach...

But it's never going to fucking happen. I'll never be free.

I also have no purpose in life—no interest in school, college, or getting a job—no interest in anything.

What's the point?

I just couldn't see the fucking point anymore.

I'm nothing.

"I won't lie...you seem happier with Edward back." She pinched my cheek, her face falling. "But I think you should forget about him. It's a lost cause—you going for him. You know you'll never leave Jake."

"If it was possible..."

She nodded. "Get dressed."

I grimaced at the bottle we had. "If we go, we can drink…I can scope the place out since I start tomorrow night?"

She nodded again, leaving my bed. "I need something to wear…Do you think Edward will be there?" She lifted her cell. "Lemme call CeeJ—wait." She faced me. "If I do, he'll think I like Edward…'cause I always call about Jasper."

I shook my head. "Why do you call your brother about Jasper?"

"To me, men are like a Rubik's Cube—impossible to understand. He helps me decipher behaviors." She grinned. "Everyone thinks he's so big and bad. He's a kitty cat."

"Yeah, okay." Her brother is the roughest, toughest dude in our 'hood. Maybe he softens for his baby sister—as my brother does the same—but it doesn't take away from what he truly is.

"I'm gonna call him. You get dressed."

She left the room, while I went through my closet. I already knew what Alice would borrow—the black minidress Jake bought me months back that doesn't fit. She's had her eye on it, and since Jake gave it to me, I didn't give a shit.

I laid it on the bed for her, and then grabbed my blue minidress with the sequins. It's tight and fits me just right. I'd turn heads tonight whether or not Edward is there . . . and I needed to feel good tonight, maybe even attractive with dressing up and wearing heels.

Alice was taking an extremely long time on the phone, so I continued to get ready—teasing my hair yet leaving it down, making sure it had body. I put my large hoop earrings on and smiled at my necklace in the mirror.

I put my makeup on, and then I was ready to go.

After placing my stilettos on my feet, I sought Alice.

She was by the banister, still on her phone.

"What's going on?"

"You got dressed that quick?" She stared at me and then behind me.

I shrugged. "I didn't have to do much."

"I'm waiting for him to call me back." She groaned. "He's at the club with Edward and Jasper!"

I was giddy for a second, at the mention of Edward. I hoped he'd see me in this dress, realize that I wasn't a little girl. "Really? Get dressed. Let's go." Yanking on her arm, I ushered us back into my bedroom, acute sadness filling me as my thoughts took a turn for the worse. They came back to reality.

Alice was right. Even if I had a chance with Edward, what was the point?

We could never be together.

Jake would never let me go.

"Ceej left the call going, and I heard a commotion. Then he said there was a fight and that he'd call me back."

I rolled my eyes. "There are always fights there—drunk bitches who can't handle their shit."

"Like you…" She poked me. "Remember that time you smacked Lauren for getting too close to Jake?"

"She had it coming—trying to creep on my man." I'd also never admit to the façade, that I was egged on, which was why I went for Lauren. People were talking shit, and I had to save face so I didn't look like a coward.

"And…?" She scoffed again. "Before you go for Edward, you have to let Jake go! He's respectable. Edward will never touch what belongs to another dude. And...if you broke up with Jake for another reason—one that has nothing to do with Edward—he wouldn't have a hold or a reason to have beef with Edward. They're not boys. Trust me! I don't spend hours picking my brother's brain for nothing."

Although her reasoning was plausible, a slight possibility, it still seemed impossible. I just wanted one night with Edward...I want those arms to hold me. I long for that safe, at home feeling.

Nevertheless, I wanted to get Alice off the subject, my brain cloudy...from the booze, just too many fucking negative thoughts. If I didn't stop, I'd start crying and ruin my makeup. "You've hooked up with half of your brother's crew. Does CJ know that?"

She ignored me, shimmying out of her shorts to put the dress on.

"Alice?" I asked, falling down onto my bed.

"No, he doesn't know . . . Riley and Marcus are hot. They fought over me once." She threw her t-shirt at me.

"They're both married."

Alice ignored that. "Tell me how to be for Jasper. I'm tired of—"

"Jasper…I don't know what my brother likes. He's a dog, though—one that doesn't get much play. But a dog nonetheless." I nodded, snorting. "He's a total pervert, but he knows—" Maybe I used to have a big mouth, dishing and gossiping to my brother. "He knows you're not…a virgin."

"What does that have to do with anything?" She bent over to mess her hair.

"I don't know…I mean, that'd be totally weird. If you and Jasper got together? I can see it as a hookup. He'd probably have sex with you, but…I don't know if he'd be your boyfriend?"

She grinned her sly grin. "Who said I wanted a boyfriend?"

"Well, okay!" I toasted to that, bringing the bottle of schnapps to my lips.

Alice faced the mirror as she started applying makeup. "Dump the mutt, and go get your man." She spoke with her hands, her attitude shining. "Jake's a douche…does whatever the fuck, and then comes here. You have every right to break up with him—"

"What?" I sat up to hear her better. She doesn't know what goes on in my relationship, yet she knows reasons why I should dump him? I didn't understand. "Um…" I was wary and at a loss for words. "What have you heard?"

She groaned, rolling her eyes. "You know how things go, right? Me and you? We're the kind of chicks you marry."

"I'm confused," I admitted. "You managed to confuse me." Meanwhile, I'm well versed in Alice-speak.

She turned to me. "You know what I'm saying . . . think about it." She touched her temple. "My brother has Marie at home—at his house, but he has that apartment. It's a guy thing. They get sex from whoever, but they have their chicks—the ones they love—at home. Or in your case—" She gestured to me.

"What are you getting at?" I stood up. "What are you tryin'a tell me?" Anger got the better of me. "I'm being played?"

She frowned. "I—I thought you knew. I thought that was why you hated Lauren—"

"Whoa!" I cut her off.

"Don't be mad at me, B!"

"I'm not," I whispered, backing down. "But what…" I didn't know how to continue.

I mean, a large part of me didn't care.

The other part...well, Jake always swore he loved me...and that love made me miserable, trapped me, made him do crazy things.

But if he's fucking Lauren, he obviously doesn't love me.

I know I don't love him.

I had to get rid of Jake, but how…? I'd tried to before, and he ignored me—called me silly and said no.

Yet, the thought of him being unfaithful hit below the belt.

I bet everyone knows about it, too—everyone but me—and I was even more of a joke in the eyes of others.

Edward could be with Lauren right now...

"We've been together for like a year!"

"I know," Alice said. "That's a long time."

I nodded.

"I thought—I thought you hated Lauren because they hooked up after you guys were together. That's what I heard. Sometimes, they sleep together."

"Who'd you hear this from?" I asked.

She stuck out her tongue and slumped her shoulders, letting out an exasperated groan.

"Tell me!"

"OKAY!" she hollered back. "Lauren told Jessica, who told the other Jessica at the tanning salon. She told me because…she knows we're good friends. Lauren's going around talking about how you're getting played and yadda-yadda."

"You ready to go?" I actually took my earrings off to stuff them in my purse. "I'mma fuck her up. She's at Gazebo now?" I stomped from my bedroom, knowing I'd be able to let go of some aggression in the near future.

Maybe I'd never be rid of Jake, but I couldn't be the ass-end of everybody's jokes either.

Although maybe I could break up the love fest between Edward and Lauren.

My feelings aside, how fuckable is she gonna be with my heel up her ass?


	22. Chapter 22

Tribute

Chapter Twenty-Two

Technically, Jasper and I ditched Jessica and Lauren. We never said a word to them. We let them dance while we did our own thing. It was a douchebag move, but . . .

When it comes to hook-ups, the chicks CJ introduced us to were a better match, or fit, whatever. We had no idea what the night would bring if we chilled with Jessica and Lauren.

But Christie, Lisa, and Angela had an air of maturity.

They knew what they wanted and outright asked, and I found that to be ballsy.

The arrangement was cool.

And I didn't expect Lauren and Jessica to make a fuss—a ruckus.

Drunk as all hell, they'd stomped over to the table, calling Christie and her friends everything under the sun.

Lauren threw her drink in Jasper's face.

All of it was unnecessary; however, I got a good chuckle out of it and so did Carlisle.

Unfortunately for them—Jessica and Lauren—they were kicked out of the club, which seemed like a pattern for them. Bouncers came and snatched them up, and being the chivalrous guy I am, I inquired about their whereabouts.

"Just chill out," CJ said.

"Fuck, man!" Jasper wiped at his suit with napkins.

"She got you good," CJ laughed. "I keep extra shirts in my office. You're welcome to—"

"I'm okay." Jazz snapped.

Carlisle raised a brow, turning to me.

I had nothing to say.

"You really don't talk much." He hit my arm.

I chuckled, holding my pursed lips.

"Drinks are still on the house." He snapped his fingers for a waitress.

I shrugged. "Whatever's clever."

"Edward…?" Christie grasped my hand. "Are we leaving?" She slid out of the booth and eased herself under my arm.

"Not yet, sweetheart." Carlisle touched her cheek. "It's my club. I gotta stay—make sure shit is cool. You understand?" he asked her.

She pouted. "I'm so ready to go, though." Christie was honestly three sheets to the wind, drunk, and I didn't know how I felt—hitting it while she was that out of it. She was still down to party, though.

"I'll get youse a cab—"

"I have my whip. I can take them home," I offered; the idea of road-head in my new car appealed to me.

"Nah, you guys stay." He literally stole Christie from me. "You, too." He grabbed Lisa's hand, jerking his head for Angela. Then the four of them walked toward the exit.

They just left because he told them to.

"What the fuck just happened?" I turned to Jazz. "Those chicks—"

"Were down to fuck." He grumbled. "Just when I was thinking this dude was cool . . ." He poured himself more rum.

I fell into a chair. "Jessica and Lauren took off. They're gone. And he was all…tryin'a hook us up. And now…?" My cock was sad.

"When he comes back, ask him. What the fuck?" My friend was as confused as I was.

"This is bullshit!" I sat back.

As quick as he'd left, Carlisle came right back to us, and the first thing he did was apologize. "Look, my baby sister's on her way here—"

"Alice?!" Jasper shouted.

"She's the only baby sister I have." Carlisle smirked at him. "I did you a favor."

Jasper widened his arms. "How so…?"

Carlisle ignored him, turning to me. "Edward—can I call you E?" He didn't give me a chance to answer. "Listen, E. I don't say no to Alice. She's my heart. We're close, and I can't leave if she's on her way here. Understand?"

I nodded. "That's understandable, but that has nothing to do with me, or what…I planned to do." I shrugged. "You understand?"

He chuckled. "Look, the night's young. I was gonna ditch a buddy to chill with youse, but now I don't have to. If by closing time, you've yet to find someone, you come to me." He hit my arm. "I'll hook you up."

"I'm not desperate," I laughed. "You cockblocked us big time…but I don't need'ju finding me a honey."

He put his palms up. "I respect that. I was just offering."

"Thank you," I said.

"Relax, listen to music…have a few more drinks. I'll come back when Bella and Alice find you guys." He went to leave.

"Whoa—"

He ignored me, getting lost within the sea of people.

"Alice and Bella?" I asked Jasper, knowing his sister would definitely take over for CJ in the cockblocking department.

Not to mention that she'd be the biggest fucking distraction.

How could I even try to score? When literal perfection is in front of me?

With a sense of dread, doom, I knew all the other chicks in this club—even the ones with banging bodies—might as well be transvestites in comparison to Bella.

Because I'd have no interest . . . they might as well have cocks.

And if she's here, I won't be able to concentrate on anything but her. Not only focusing on how gorgeous she is. I'd have to keep an eye out for other fuckers.

Unless her mutt, Jake, tags along.

Tonight was a total bust.

"You'd think Alice would come here without her? Tonight's fucked. Let's just go." He went to get up.

I nodded, agreeing with him. "Yeah."

Jasper groaned, settling back down. "I can't go." He shrugged, looking to his phone. "I gotta stay if she's gonna chill here. I won't be able to—"

I put a hand up to stop him. "I understand. You won't be able to take your mind off her being here, or relax. You wanna make sure she's safe."

Believe it or not—motherfucking chicks with dicks or not—I needed to make sure she was safe, too.

He patted my back. "I'm glad you get it. She's...Like CJ said about Alice...Bella is my heart."

I nodded, knowing his sister was taking up too much space in my own.


	23. Chapter 23

**Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**No copyright infringement intended. Stephenie Meyer owns everything but the plot. That's mine. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

Sadly, Jasper's conscience got the best of him.

He refused to leave if Bella was going to be here, and I honestly didn't mind.

I didn't want to leave if Bella was going to show up either.

We stayed.

We didn't move. We had another drink. Since we'd been knocking back the hard shit all night, I was feeling good.

In fact, I was actually waiting and anticipating Bella's arrival.

Where the fuck was she?

When I looked to my phone, I felt like an idiot.

CJ had only left us, told us Bella and Alice were coming through twenty minutes ago.

Time was moving too fucking slowly.

"Yo…" That guy Riley came to sit in the booth with us. "CJ has a problem. Needs to speak with you."

"Me?" I asked.

"What's going on?" Jasper tilted his head to us.

Riley waved him away. "We're short a guy. You think you can just stand there—by the door?"

I shook my head. "You want me to work the front door? Security?"

"No, have his back," he laughed. "Come on." Riley left the table.

I looked to Jasper.

"You gotta go," he said, shrugging. "You have to go. I may not be his biggest fan, 'cause he's always on my ass—" I finally got a shred of truth out of him, why he has a problem with CJ.

"On your ass?" I asked.

"Playing matchmaker and shit. The father—your godfather, too. They want me with Alice—talk about marriage and a fuckin' dowry, like this is the 1800s and shit. They're trying to marry her off...to me." He pointed to himself, contemplative and lazily. Jasper was obviously drunk. "That's why I keep my distance." He rushed out, slamming his hand on the table.

My friend wasn't finished. "I'd be a shitty fuckin' husband, I think, and Alice annoys the shit outta me. Plus!" Jasper held up a finger, while I looked over to Riley. He was talking to some dudes, so I figured I had another minute "—that girl's a ho...like for real. Just gives it up, like this—" he snapped his fingers "—and you know you can't turn a ho into a housewife. Not that I want a housewife...Fuck. It's a new millennium, right?"

I nodded.

"If I gotta work, my boo betta' be bringin' home the bacon, too." He sipped his drink.

I threw my head back and laughed. "That's—" I really didn't have a reply.

"Alice's fine-ass walks around all innocent when she's around her family. I don't think I could live with all the hypocrisy either."

"You admit she's fine?" I continued to laugh.

He nodded slowly. "I'd hit it, but I can't put a ring on it. And they...they're on my ass. They think I'm this nice guy. I don't know." Jasper poured himself another drink. "Anyway, while I dislike the pressure he puts on me...if CJ requests to see you, you have to go. I don't know." He finally told me what was up, and he actually came full-circle to his original point.

Impressed, I gave his shoulder a squeeze. "You'll figure it out, and he won't harp on your forever. Trust."

He sighed, lifting his glass to toast. "He has laid off me...somewhat."

"You're not the only guy in the 'hood. They want Alice's to be somebody else's problem—whatever—they'll find someone or she'll meet someone else. No worries. She won't wait around forever, hoping...I don't know."

He pursed his lips, leaning back. "You think so?"

I narrowed my eyes at my friend. "Yeah...that'd be okay with you, right?" It was sort of comical because he probably digs her.

"I'd be the first in line to throw rice at her wedding—" okay, maybe he doesn't like her "—I mean, birdseed. They throw birdseed. It doesn't make pigeon bellies explode, or whatever happens." He cracked himself up.

"Maybe you should slow down?" I chuckled, pointing to his drink.

"Bro…?" Riley widened his arms, waiting for me.

"I'mma go talk to that one." Jasper narrowed his eyes, pointing across the room.

Although I couldn't see who he was referring to, I wished him the best before I followed after Riley.

"See if she gotta friend!" I boomed out to him, paces away, thinking by some miracle I could duck out before Bella arrived.

My friend winked, having heard me.

Satisfied with that, I trailed after Riley, following him to an office in the back.

Bella. Bella. Bella.

I bet she gets here while I'm not around.

"Keep your hand in your jacket."

I laughed, tipsy, thinking it hysterical. "You're serious? Like in The Godfather and they're at the hospital—" Maybe I was drunk, but I thought it was ridiculous.

"This ain't no movie, kid. Just stand where I tell you."

"Whoa." I stopped him from going inside, leaning to his ear to whisper. "I don't have anything on me." I didn't want to be around some guys who had guns and there's potential beef, and all I'd have was my dick if some shit popped off.

He shook his head. "Be easy. You don't need anything. Just pretend you do, and there won't be a problem."

That whole exchange sobered me up a lot, and I stayed by the door with my hand in my jacket—near my waist. Unlike the others who were doing the same, I had jack-shit on me. I wasn't strapped.

But I stood there with a straight face.

It wasn't hard. When I was overseas, I used to keep watch all the time, only I had an AK or some heavy shit on me. Pretending I had a nine or a pistol was easy.

CJ sat at his desk while Marcus stood to his right. Riley walked right behind, standing to his left. Some dude sat in front with his own crew—two guys—behind him.

"I'm glad we could sit down," Carlisle said.

"Who's that?" My presence wasn't lost on his guests.

"That's Edward Masino—a rising star of mine. You can speak freely. His silence is golden." Carlisle smiled at me.

I didn't say a word.

"Edward, this is Felix—a friend."

I nodded.

Felix put his hand out.

I gave him a chin jerk, unsure of what to do.

"So…" Carlisle clapped, gaining his attention.

They continued to speak back and forth about guns, no less. I thought it ironic and funny.

As the conversation went on, I got to thinking Felix was a capo—he was within the Colleoni organization, the family.

But I got the feeling that Carlisle didn't enjoy his company, didn't like him. His tone said a lot. He was short, never smiled, and he was a condescending prick—nothing like the dude I'd gotten to know these past few days.

It actually seemed like Carlisle was different people—who he was around these guys, and who he was around me—Jasper and me—and the way he'd spoken about his sister, how his face lit up.

When Felix and his crew made to leave, I was instructed to see them out.

Without a clue, I walked them to the door. They said goodbye, being fairly polite, and then got into a car that was double parked outside.

On my way back in, Riley caught up to me. "You did good."

I nodded.

"Take this." He placed money in my jacket pocket.

"That's—"

"You earned it. CJ told me to give that to you. Also—" he placed his arm around me "—you heard what they was sayin', right?"

I nodded again as we walked farther into the club.

"I gotta take that drive—down to Tampa? You come with me," he spoke, pointing his finger back and forth.

"What?" I laughed.

"We leave in a few days. I'd take care of you . . . I mean, it was actually Senior's idea, get your feet wet, let you make some money."

"Huh…" I didn't have much else to say.

"Think about it . . ." He patted my back. "You talk to your uncle, and then get back to me." He handed me a business card.

Looking down to it, I saw that this dude was a lawyer.

"Hard to believe, right?" he laughed. "Old man Colleoni sent me to law school. He's a good guy. You treat him right—with respect and loyalty—and he'll treat you the same. I kick-up to CJ, but—first and foremost—I work for Colleoni. You'll do well if you do the same. CJ's...who he is, but be loyal to the old man. He has a lot of respect for you—for who your pops was."

"Thanks." I thought it was sound advice if nothing else.

"You good? I gotta head home. My wife's eight months pregnant." He beamed. "And I can't be staying out late if there's no biz."

"Congratulations," I said.

He winked and squeezed my shoulder.

"Wait." I caught him before he left. Just because I don't say much doesn't mean I don't open my mouth when necessary. "You're a lawyer. I'm guessing you rank high?" I raised a brow. "And you're taking the ride…?" I hoped he knew what I was getting at. "It's seems like something...someone lower on the totem pole—"

"A low-man," he said. "It's something a low-man, like yourself—someone who's just getting started—would do. It's my connection, though. That's why." He put his arm around me, gave me a squeeze to his side. "Edward, you think about it. If it's not for you...hey, no hard feelings. If it's for you, your godfather wants you rollin' with me."

"I'll let you know," I whispered into his ear.

Everything was hushed whispers, it seemed.

"I look forward to hearing from you." Then he turned from me to leave the club.

Knowing I'd find out more soon, when I had dinner with Junior and Senior tomorrow, I sought out Jazz.

When I found him, I was surprised to see an irate Bella screaming and an exasperated Jasper.

My friend held his forehead and he didn't look happy. I couldn't hear what his sister was upset about.

Jake was nowhere to be seen.

Thank God.

I'd stopped paces away to survey, spy Bella and check her out from afar . . . so I could study her, get a good look without being caught.

Bella looked really good...fucking gorgeous, spectacular, better than usual if that's even possible.

She wore this blue dress. It had sparkles or something on it, making her stand out, all shiny because of the lights around the club.

It was almost like a spotlight, the club a stage, and I thoroughly enjoyed the show.


	24. Chapter 24

Tribute

Chapter Twenty-Four

"What are you doing over here?" Alice sidled up to me, or...she caught me spying.

"Uh—" my eyes stayed on Bella "—I was just talking to some chick," I lied.

"Really?" Alice beamed at me, glancing down to the two Heineken's within her grasp. "Well...here—" she handed me a beer "—hold it. You won't look as awkward." She definitely caught me being creepy. "Standing still...by yourself in a nightclub...without a drink."

I furrowed my brow, but I didn't say anything.

"Enjoy." Alice winked, walking back over to the table.

I followed after her, sort of joining the group, yet a pace or two away.

I casually sipped from the longneck.

"Did you know?" Bella shouted at her brother; I could hear them now. "Tell me!"

"No, I didn't know!" Jazz hollered back. "If I did, you don't think we would'a had words? You think I'd let my sister get played? You think I'd let you stay with that asshole?"

Bella had no reply to that.

"But now that I do know…" Jasper laughed, darkly, shaking his head. "You're done with him, Bella. That's it. You hear me? I don't know what goes on between you two. You don't tell me shit, but I know something's going on!" He was pissed, which in turn got me heated, all these questions popping off in my head.

What had Jake done? What has he been doing? Where is he now?

I'd kill him, and Jasper could help me dig a hole. I don't know. I was anxious to know what'd been going on, too.

But who the fuck was I? I just came back to town. Being away was one thing . . .

And I couldn't even name the feeling I had, really.

Thinking I should have been here, feeling guilty because I wasn't.

Thinking I could have been here for Jasper, helped out when Gram died.

My attraction for Bella aside—regardless of living someplace else—nothing changed the fact that those two have always been like my family.

"Jasper—" Bella had calmed some.

"No!" he shouted. "You're hiding shit from me, and you're not you. The past six months—fuck, the past year. Who the fuck are you?" Jasper gestured to her. "You changed when you met him. And he always walks around with a smile, lays all that sweet boyfriend shit on thick when I'm around. I just need you to be honest with me. I can't help you, I can't do shit unless I know what's really wrong—"

Bella looked embarrassed, her face red, only her eyes quickly glanced around. They landed on me for a second before she went back to Jazz. "This isn't about me—or any of that right now. I don't need your help—"

"What?" Jasper pulled on his hair. "Bella—"

"Just stay away from those skanks!" She stomped her foot, and it became apparent to me that she was making up bullshit to deflect everything he'd just said.

"I didn't do anything!" Jasper defended. "This is about you, Bella . . . I mean, we're in a crowded club, but hey...I'm just glad you're saying more than two sentences to me—"

They continued to argue back and forth, but all I saw were legs.

"You're lashing out at me because of some shit he did," Jasper shouted.

"No!" she cringed. "I mean, you don't understand—"

"I understand perfectly."

"You're not my father!" she laughed.

Jasper laughed, too, meanwhile, he was hurt. It was all over his face. "I'm the closest fuckin' thing you got to one!"

"I'm sorry." Now Bella looked close to tears. "I'm so tired of everyone trying to control me!"

Jasper waved a hand, finishing his drink. "Who's controlling you?"

"But it's not about any of that. I still can't believe you guys went out with them! You're my brother. That's—that's disrespectful. First she...with him and now my brother?" Bella was in that microscopic, shiny dress, and it was so fucking tight . . .

She was upset about something—whether she chose to mask it with some other bullshit issue didn't matter—and I felt like such a piece of shit. I was checking her out while she's obviously going through some emotional stuff.

I averted my gaze.

"I. Didn't. Do. Anything," Jazz repeated himself.

Looking at her didn't take away my concern, though.

I was torn—between wanting to hug her and go driving around for her man.

I got the feeling he cheated.

To me, it didn't matter.

Maybe this would give her the push to leave him.

And I was sick of looking for reasons to kick Jake's ass.

The next time I see him...that's it.

Before I officially got to the table, I took off my jacket. I peeped two dudes staring at Bella, and they were talking about her. It was obvious. I don't know how Jasper felt about what his sister was wearing, but I had mixed feelings about it—feeling overprotective.

That fucking dress . . .

"Take my jacket," I said in her ear.

She turned to me with fire in her eyes. "Excuse me?"

I smirked, thinking she looked cute—all mad and shit. "It's cold in here. They must crank up the A/C." I placed my jacket over her shoulders.

Her chest was heaving, and I wasn't sure . . . The way Bella is, the way she is when I'm around, she was either going to calm down or try to deck me like she did this morning.

"I don't want your jacket!" She pushed it into me, and that's when I smelled the booze on her.

"You're drunk?"

"What do you care? You're probably drunk, too." She waved a fist as she almost lost her footing.

I righted her, grasping her bicep and looking to Jazz. His sister was trashed. Fuck. He was drunk, too. No wonder they kept that argument going for so long.

"Where'd those hos go, huh? Did'ju fuck 'em and then send 'em home?" Bella asked me, and she was very loud now, could be heard over the music.

I laughed. "One, that's none of your business. Two, they left…" I shrugged, gazing out to the people who remained here. The club was still packed with bodies—many glorious looking ones at that, but my earlier assessment was true.

None of them compared to Bella.

"You don't want the jacket? Fine." I placed it back on.

"Youse got some nerve—all fucking men!" She was making a scene now, which was probably because my presence pissed her off some more. Fuck if I know. Many people turned our way, including Carlisle, who'd sat with Alice.

I grasped Bella's arm again. "Listen, little girl—" I whispered in her ear "—you keep going on, you'll kiss your new job goodbye. Be easy."

Whatever I said shut her up, but Bella was still upset. She was shaking in anger or shivering. I wouldn't be surprised by the latter. She was practically fucking naked.

"You wanna go for a walk?" I asked.

She nodded, looking as though she might cry again.

After telling Jasper—who seemed miserable sitting with Carlisle and now Alice, by the way—that I was taking Bella for a walk so she'd cool down, we left the club.

We walked along Fourth Avenue, where I insisted she wear my jacket. Bella made a fuss, but then she put it on.

"I just hate men!"

"Keep your voice down. You wanna talk? I'll listen. Tell me what's going on." I shrugged, leaving my hands in my pockets.

Bella groaned, walking ahead of me.

While I enjoyed the view, I didn't appreciate the catcalls she received without me next to her.

"Relax." I placed my arm around her. "Just talk to me, Bella-Boo. What's going on with you?"

She snuck her arm around my waist, hugging onto my side. "Why do men cheat?"

"I don't know." I was honest. "I can't tell you."

She pouted, looked on the verge of tears, and that's when I realized . . .

Bella's always either on the brink of crying, trying to fuck me, or quiet.

It could be because of me.

I wished I knew. In any event, I wished she wasn't so sad sometimes.

"Did Jake do something?" I asked. "What's the deal with you two?" That was a question I'd asked her a few times by now, and I've yet to receive an answer.

"I'm so stupid," she cried. "Me going after Lauren—who gives a fuck? You know? But now Jasper's gonna seek out Jake."

I nodded. "I got Jasper's back. Jake steps to him…fuck that." Anger bubbled up inside me. "You don't need to worry about Jasper."

"Oh…" She covered her face, buried it into my side. "Now…all this shit is gonna happen. I'm so stupid. I should have—should have kept my mouth shut. What's wrong with me? I just got so mad—"

I lifted her chin, those sad yet beautiful eyes making my chest feel tight. "Don't worry about it. Okay? But tell me what's going on."

She sniffled, her cute nose pink because she was crying. "Jake's been sleeping with Lauren…behind my back. I didn't know."

I chuckled, brushing her hair away from her cheek. The wind and her tears made the strands stick to her face. "Sweetheart, what would you have done if I said yes earlier?" I raised a brow, finding this comical now.

"Ugh." She pushed me away. "You don't understand."

I still had her hand and yanked her into my side. "Be honest with me. We're friends, right?"

"Friends!" She spat.

I rolled my eyes. "Come on, Silly Girl. Tell Eddie Spaghetti what's wrong."

She hummed, hugging onto me tightly now. "I'm sorry about before. I missed you so much, and no. I didn't—wasn't thinking about Jake at all. But I got played."

I nodded. "I missed you, too."

"Really?" She beamed, wiping her tears away.

"Really." I confirmed, rubbing circles into her back. "I just—I didn't expect you to, uh, be so grown up?" She felt amazing in my arms, a perfect fit. Everything about this girl was perfect.

Bella laughed but still managed to look sad. "Grown up?"

"Come on. You know you got it goin' on. And if Jake wants to do whatever...? Let him. It's his loss."

"You don't understand." She shook her head.

"I do," I said. "Jake's only playing himself, not you 'cause you're better off without him—he's gonna miss out on how wonderful you are."

Suddenly, Bella was in tears again. "You're wonderful. You're everything." The conviction with which she spoke made my stomach tie in knots.

"Bella…" I started to wipe her tears away. "I'm…I'm just a guy. No one special. I don't even know who I am anymore." More honesty.

"I know who you are. I promise not to call you it anymore, but you are my Eddie Spaghetti."

I shook my head, smiling. "What's got you this upset? Is it really that joke of a dude? Come on." I pinched her cheek. It was ridiculous that she'd waste any time thinking about Jake.

She fisted my shirt. "Jake is one thing . . . but the thought of you hooking up with Lauren or even Jessica, or anyone—"

"Bella..." I grasped her forearms, making her let go of my shirt.

"I'm serious. I'm tipsy, but I'm not drunk. I know what I'm saying."

"Be realistic. You got a crush on me? I mean—" I had no idea how to continue, but I knew crashing at Jasper's was going to be awkward from now on. I knew that after I left her bedroom earlier, too. I'm constantly reminded every-single-time just looking at Bella gives me an erection.

By this point in time, I was lying to myself and her.

I was interested, but I wouldn't disrespect Jasper.

It seemed like Bella didn't know what to say either. She left my side to hug herself and walk ahead of me.

"Bella—"

"Just leave me alone. I'll be fine. I always am. Just let me deal." She put her hands up, walking along the avenue. "I shouldn't have done that before—" she waved a hand between us "—I'm sorry for pushing. I'm stupid."

"You are not!" I shouted.

Bella didn't respond.

I stood on the sidewalk, pinching the bridge of my nose at a total loss. "You want a ride home?"

"You're okay to drive?" She whipped back around to me. "I just want my bed...I can't walk all the way back in these heels. I promise to behave." She showed me her palms, and I believed her . . . not that it made a difference . . . it's not like I minded.

The cooler wind, which was whipping around, had sobered me up.

I was fine to drive us back home; however, Jasper was content to stay at Gazebo—still having drinks with Carlisle and Alice.

By his demeanor, I doubted he was staying just to appease Carlisle. He seemed cool, and I'd have to remember to ask more about all that shit.


	25. Chapter 25

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

_**B**_ella and I had fun during the drive back. I had my head, I was no longer the slightest bit tipsy, and we tried to see what my new baby could do. We hopped on the Belt Parkway, only having to go one exit until we got off at Bath Avenue.

But for the two minutes, I was able to gun it to seventy.

Bella squealed, and I hadn't smiled as wide in a dog's age.

It was great.

"That was cool!" Bella shouted. "I know it can go much faster than what you were going." She looked out the window.

I sped up, going mad fast, but then I put my arm out when I had to stop short—red light and all.

Bella giggled. "My gram used to do that."

That kind of killed my jovial mood. "Again, I'm so sorry about that. I know youse were close."

When we were kids, Jasper never said much about their parents. Their mother died while actually giving birth to Bella, and then his father disappeared a few years later.

I know he used to suspect it was a mob hit—he told me that when we were like thirteen—although he knew nothing about his father. But that shit isn't surprising—not in this neighborhood, where it seems everyone is connected. Everyone might have a different story, but around here everyone has a mob tie.

They moved in with their grandmother right after their mom died. Even if he died young, their pops didn't stick around to do much while he was alive. Grandma Cigno raised them, was all they ever really knew. When we were kids, Jasper would get into moods—when he'd miss their parents.

But Grandma Cigno was their heart, someone they could always rely on.

She nodded. "Jasper sold all her things . . . I wanted to keep it all. Jasper…He thinks logically, I guess."

Since I never knew my grandparents, I was close to Grandma Cigno, too.

We were all close, actually. My father and Colleoni Senior would look out for her. But I don't know what happened after I left.

"Mr. Colleoni offered Jasper money, but . . . you know how proud he can be. Instead, he offered Jasper the management job at Sal's."

I nodded. "I own that now." My tone was hushed. "It's mine. I have all this money—a house, the pizzeria . . . I've barely had time to let it process."

"That's really cool." She smiled. "You're set for life—"

"And if I am, that means you and Jasper are, too. You guys are like siblings—"

She groaned. "You just killed the last of my buzz—calling us siblings." She grimaced.

It made me chuckle because...I shouldn't refer to Bella as that nowadays, not with how I feel. That's fucking gross. "Why, you wanna be my girl or something?" I gave her a fleeting glance.

She didn't answer me, staring out the window.

Having never been able to make heads or tails of broads, I pulled into the driveway behind Jazz's Honda—content to let the conversation die.

Regardless of what her answer would have been, she could never be my girl any-fucking-way. I just curious. Did she only want me to get her off, did she only want to fuck me, or...?

_It didn't make a difference anyway._

"Yo!"

Someone hit the back of my car.

Alarmed, I placed my hand on Bella's thigh. "Stay here." I went to get out.

"It's, um, Jake." She left the car before me.

I groaned, leaving my car with a quickness.

* * *

**Thank you for reading.**


	26. Chapter 26

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

"What the fuck?" I widened my arms.

Bella had her claws out, aiming for him. "Lauren? You fucked Lauren!?"

Jake smiled. "What…? Baby, I don't understand." He backed up a few steps.

Bella advanced while I followed her, wanting to grab her before she took a swing at him.

Jake's the pussy-type to swing back, hit a woman, and then I'd really have to kill him.

"I know all about it! So, why don't you just admit it?" Her foot tapped.

"You're so brave, talking to me like that in front of this cat?" Jake pointed to me.

Bella surprised the fuck out of me when she apologized. "I'm sorry." She moved back toward me.

I narrowed my eyes, trying to study their behaviors—still in a state of shock, I believe.

Jake stared down at her. "You think I won't?" he laughed, his gaze coming back to me again.

I was too busy staring at my silly girl.

Though, all I could focus on was how...the life left Bella? How she seemed almost dead on her feet? No emotion showed on her usually-expressive face—not anger, not necessarily sadness or fear, and certainly not joy.

"What's—" I wasn't sure what to ask, pointing two fingers between them, my hackles rising. Anger filled me instantly, this instinct to shield her from him very strong. My muscles were coiled.

Ready to spring, I silently berated myself. There was no way I wanted Bella harmed. She had to go, leave the scene before I could do a damn thing. Or, maybe I just wanted her away from Jake very badly—just away.

Leave me alone with him.

Bella turned to me. "I'm okay, Edward. Just go inside."

I snickered, walking closer to her. "I think—" Before I could tell _her_ to go inside, as I wanted to have a chat with Jake, he demanded my attention.

He snapped his fucking fingers. "Can you give us a minute?" He never waited for my answer, grabbing ahold of Bella's arm to drag her away from me.

"Oww—" Bella didn't even fight against him.

Laughing, thinking this fucking ridiculous now . . .

_I mean, the balls on this fucking prick._

It took me a second to declare him the dumbest motherfucker on the planet before I got between the two. "Keep your fucking hands to yourself. Understand?" I asked, dipping my head to be at eye-level with him, as he's a few inches shorter than me.

He smirked, standing to his full height. "You really wanna do this?"

I smiled, looking around us and taking off my jacket. "I've been waitin' to do this." It was true.

"Edward, no!" Bella was in my face. "Just stop—"

"Relax. Go inside." I used my arm to place her behind me. "You ready?" I asked Jake.

"Only a real douchebag would get between a guy and his girl. What I do—what_ we_ do—is none of your business!"

"Why you stalling?" I asked, taking a step toward him.

"Stalling?" He looked for Bella. "Don't you go inside. After I handle this, I wanna talk to you—" Speaking of talking, he was doing too much of it.

I cut him off with my right hook, which sent him flying into a parked car.

Bella gasped.

Jake held his face.

I punched my chest like an ape, getting amped and then widening my arms. "Let's do this!"

He wiggled his jaw, standing straight. "I beat your ass, you don't interfere no more. You leave me and my girl alone, and you keep your eyes to yourself. You don't look at what's mine and you don't talk to what's mine. _You_ understand? Think I don't know you gotta hard-on for her?"

I nodded. "She's not yours, nor has she ever been_ yours_." I smiled. "When I beat your ass, and I will, you'll leave—you forget Bella exists."

"Guys!" Bella shouted.

We ignored her.

Jake narrowed his eyes, and then he came barreling toward me—using his shoulder to get me in the gut and slam me into the trunk of my car.

I grunted, lifting my knee to get him in the chest.

He fell back onto his ass.

"Get up," I said, adrenaline running through me, feeling alive and excited.

Jake caught his breath, getting to his feet. "You're a dumb motherfucker, you know that?" He took off his shirt, and I saw a nine sticking out of his waist. "I play fair." He grasped it and placed it under his car's wheel.

I didn't say anything, watching his movements.

But this wouldn't be a fair fight, and I knew it.

I'd definitely have the advantage.

He can be as street as he thinks he is—run around with whomever, but I was here first. I ran these streets before him, and I had years as a Marine on me. Trust. I know how to fight. My skills surpass just knowing how to defend myself.

And my chest was heaving, hate, jealously, and anger flowing along with that adrenaline. Ironically, this wasn't about what he did to Bella—why I was so heated—but it was a part of it. I hated him on principle alone. That was when I realized how much Bella had affected me.

Jake's girl or not . . .

Jasper's baby sister or not . . .

I was very attracted to her.

I wanted her.

I wanted her for me. I wanted to take care of her, make her smile again, make her happy.

Alas, Jake was merely one obstacle I'd have to go through.

I could do all those things I wanted...except having her for me, my own selfish needs.

I'd be her friend. I'd be whatever she needed.

That's how I'd care for her.

Bella was obviously going through something emotionally. I hope one day she trusts me enough to tell me, but I'd be there for her in any event.

She was mine.

"Let's go!" I called him with my hand, 'cause this dude is forever stalling.

"Stop!" Bella shouted.

He came at me to push me.

I didn't budge. "The fuck was that?" I got him in his nose this time.

He didn't fall onto his ass again but ran at me, knocking me to the ground. We rolled around a bit, fists flying. I wasn't surprised to have the upper hand. I knew I would. I was just waiting for Jake to come at me.

I had something to prove, and I was doing it well...without a nine, without a weapon, with _just_ my fists.

Gritting my teeth, straddling Jake, I landed blow after blow—right hook, left cross—getting out all my anger and aggression.

"Edward—stop!" I barely felt Bella pulling on my shoulders. "You'll kill him. That's enough!"

A growl vibrated through me, and I got Jake one more time in the face.

"Edward!" Bella knocked me with something—her purse.

I shook my head, my chest still heaving. I'd stopped hitting him and got off him, standing to his side. "Point taken?" I asked. "Stay away from her."

Jake coughed, trying to get to his feet. "This ain't over—"

I cupped my ear like I heard him wrong.

"You ain't shit, Masino," he laughed, bloodied and beaten and still on the concrete.

I smirked and kicked him in the gut. "Get the fuck outta hea. Now." I pointed down the street. "It's not over? You wanna come at me again? By-all-fucking-means, but you leave her alone!" I jerked a thumb to Bella.

He smiled and spit blood onto the ground, his eyes going to Bella.

"Jake?" she sniffled, placing her hand on his back.

"Get off, bitch!" he spat, nudging her away.

Bella groaned, using her stiletto to kick him in his ass.

He fell to the ground once more.

I held back my chuckle, yet I was still angry—now at her, for seeing if he was okay. What games was she playing? That motherfucker didn't deserve her concern, especially since…

She went to him first…

The fact that she went to him at all and not me…

Was I wrong to be concerned? Was I wrong for defending her?

Through our travels, I'd have beat his ass anyway, but tonight...?

_Her heel nearly went up his ass, though._

"I hate you! Don't come back! I never wanna see you again! We're done!" Bella hollered after him before running to her front door.

_I guess that settled that._

When I saw that Jake never grabbed his neglected piece, I did.

I placed it in my waist and turned for the house, getting out my keys, as I spied Jake paces away already.

Bella was in front of me now, and I reached around her for the lock.

"Shouldn't you check your man?" I asked, opening the door. Her concern for him was still grating on my nerves.

She didn't say anything. Bella stared at me for a long moment.

"Bella?" I raised a brow.

* * *

**Thank you for reading.**


	27. Chapter 27

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

"I kicked him!" She sounded excited, punching the air and looking adorable. "It felt so good," she giggled. "Exhilarating and freeing in a way!"

I didn't say anything, but I smiled.

Bella composed herself. "You really gave it to him good. You proved your point long before. I just...I wanted you to stop. If you killed him, you might...there'd be even _more_ trouble."

To me, killing Jake would not have been the end of the world.

Bella's smile disappeared and she held her head. "He's gonna come back. He's gonna, he's gonna—" She actually looked afraid, started hyperventilating and shit.

"No," I said, placing my hands on her shoulders. "Listen to me, if he comes back, I'll take care of him. You got nothing to worry about."

"But _I_ kicked him, and, and he'll go after Jasper. He'll round up his boys, and he'll come back for you, too." She was frantic, grabbing at my shirt. "We all have to leave—at least for a little while. Until you can talk to CJ."

I pushed her messy hair behind her ears. "Don't worry about it. He ain't gonna do shit. He'll lick his wounds, get over it." I shrugged, not wanting to get into the male ego, or Jake's pride that was probably hurt. I know I wouldn't come back, nor would I want anyone knowing.

"Relax. Jasper's safe. Okay? I'll have my eyes open. I'll make sure he doesn't do anything."

"You don't understand." She reached to palm my cheek, gulping and catching my gaze.

"You heard me?" I asked, licking my lips.

Bella ran her fingers over my nose, kept brushing her thumbs against my cheeks.

The way she was searching my eyes, I was nervous at what she might see. "No worries." My hands came to rest on her shoulders.

"He got you a few times." Bella continued to stroke my face.

I shook my head, which in turn broke the spell. "I'm fine…like mosquito bites. That's what his hits felt like," I laughed, finally turning and entering the foyer.

"Edward…" Bella stopped me, closing the door behind herself.

Now on my way upstairs, I turned back to her.

She flashed me half a grin before she lunged for me. Bella wrapped her arms and legs around me, making me fall back onto the stairs. Then she crashed her mouth to mine.

Her kiss felt incredible, and I wasn't thinking because I deepened it—tangling my tongue with hers. I'd also moved to where I was on top of her, hovering over her small frame. Her legs came to wrap around my waist again.

The kiss went straight to my cock, too, and I stupidly let her know it by grinding against her.

She was so passionate—this little firebug—running her hands all over me, moaning into my mouth, thrusting up to meet me. Bella had such a ferocity, like something ignited from within. When I was her age, the chicks I'd been with were nothing like this, like her.

They wouldn't be.

_No one would._

"Fuck me…right here," she said against my lips.

I smiled, pushing her soft hair away from her gorgeous face.

She grabbed my hand and kissed my raw knuckles. "Edward…"

When I gazed into her eyes, I remembered myself. "Bella—" I leaned away but she pulled me back down to her.

Her lips touched mine once more, and I couldn't—

I couldn't stop myself from kissing her back. I'd never felt so much in one kiss, never cared so much about any female—no matter if we're just friends. Technically, she's the only woman in my life. She was beautiful, everything I wanted. Her body alone . . .

"We can't." I swallowed, grasping the banister to pull myself up.

She scooted higher on the stairs. "You know you want me. And now _I know_ you want me," she whispered.

I nodded. "Yeah, you're probably tight—I mean, _right!_ Fuck." I hit the wall.

Bella giggled. "There's only one way to find out." She bit my neck.

All I could do was pant, looking down to her. After a minute, I said "…That doesn't mean—"

She spread her legs, and…she was so close. I should have closed my eyes, but I couldn't look away. "Do you know how wet I get? When I see you, talk to you, hear your voice…and what you just did…" Bella scooped her panties to the side, started touching her pussy inches away from my face. "Shit." She bit her lip, toying with her swollen, pink clit.

My heart was pounding away in my chest, and all I wanted was more, but my next words were a betrayal. "What are you doing? You shouldn't—" I couldn't look away, my cock so hard it strained against my fly.

"You wanna taste me, Edward?"

I licked my lips, at a loss for words, and I wanted to dip my head badly—suck on her clit and lap at her pussy.

"Do you…?" She held out her hand, her fingers glistening in the dim light from the foyer.

I cleared my throat, had gathered the strength to avert my gaze.

"Edward…?" She placed her fingers under my nose.

I caught a whiff, and that was enough. Her scent was enough to drive me insane. Before I knew what I was doing, I'd sucked her tiny fingers back into my mouth, a groan coming from somewhere in me. "You _want_ me to fuck you?" I asked, leaning my forehead to hers.

"Yes," she whined. "Please."

With anticipation flowing through me now—I had to, had to, had to.

Bella reached for my pants. She tossed Jake's nine over to the side and started to undo them.

"Bella, wait—"

"Just let me…" she whispered, sneaking her little hand into my pants.

I knew I could have stopped her, but when she grasped my cock, a shudder ran through me.

"You're thick," she said in my ear.

I turned, catching her lips with my own. "Jasper—"

"Don't worry about him."

"I do…worry." I blew out a slow breath, her grip on my dick tight.

Bella ducked her head, unzipping my fly, pushing my boxers down to free me. "Just let me suck you off," she giggled.

"Oh!" I quickly grabbed for my pants. I'd already gone too far.

Bella was pissed. She narrowed her eyes, and I thought she was going to scream or hit me again. I was surprised when it seemed like she might start crying. "You really don't want me."

"Are you insane?" I had to smile at how cute and silly she was. "No, you drive _me_ insane," I laughed. "Your brother is my best friend—"

"It's because of Jasper then?"

By this time, I could honestly say he was the only thing holding me back from dogging his sister.

I wasn't lying earlier.

The girl had it going on, and my cock was hurting…missed her hand. And my brain was fucking with me, wondering how her lips on my dick would feel.

"Yes." I cleared my throat again. "You think all I'm interested in is sex...I mean, I am, but my reasoning for not wanting to...I think it comes from a good place?" I didn't know if I was making sense.

But I did know that Bella couldn't fuck me and leave it at that.

We couldn't have this moment, and then go back to being just friends.

And I needed her in my life forever. I needed to care for her. I needed to be her friend, be her protector.

We could ruin everything.

For all I know, shit is already fucked.

I didn't want to disrespect her brother—my best friend, someone I consider a brother.

I cared too much about her to just fuck her.

I know it's what she wants, but...

She kissed my neck, making my eyes roll back. "Jasper doesn't have to know," she whispered, nuzzling her nose under my ear. "Right?" Her hand came back to my crotch; she rubbed me over my slacks. "I'd never say a word…and I meant what I said earlier. I mean—" she nipped my earlobe "—Jake's a scumbag. I told Alice already. I was breaking up with him anyway. I hate him—don't make me talk about him."

"Just like that?" I snapped my fingers. "You're done with him?"

She nodded. "Just like that." Her tongue came out to lick my lips. "I want you, Edward. I've always wanted you."

I palmed her cheek to kiss her deep, missing that tongue—her mouth.

* * *

**Thank you for reading.**


	28. Chapter 28

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

"Nobody has to know."

I groaned, kissing down her neck, halfway to not giving a fuck—my reasons flying out the window.

She fiddled with my pants. "You're so sexy," she hissed, jacking my dick again.

I pushed into her hand, my own running up her torso to palm her tits. They were more than a handful, and I wished her dress would disappear.

"Trust me; Jasper would rather see me with you." She bit my jaw. "You're a good guy, Edward."

I closed my eyes tightly, trying to gather the strength to leave her—stop what we were doing.

"Besides, nobody has to know."

I gazed into her eyes. "You mean that?" It was torturous to deny her now. "Things will stay the same between us? We'll still be friends, I mean?" Maybe it sounded juvenile, but the latter was very important to me.

"Yes...Cross my heart." She kissed me again, making me forget who I was, where I was, what the fuck we were doing.

I went with it.

Without another word, things got heavier. Our kisses became sloppier and yet more passionate. My hands roamed about, and I kept squeezing her tits because she had a great rack. When Bella pulled her dress down, I dove for them, capturing her nipple with my teeth, which made her buck her hips, seek friction and cry out.

"You're killin' me," she whined, reaching between us to touch herself again.

And I dug that—that she was aggressive, knew what she wanted and couldn't wait.

Again, I watched her hand, her fingers twirling around her clit.

"You okay?" she whispered, scooting higher up the stairs—one step.

But she wasn't getting away from me now.

I followed, still hovering over her, and reaching out to touch her. Once my hand made contact with her pussy, she melted back into the stairs—her eyes closing, her mouth parting, and these softs sighs fell from her lips.

"Fuck." When I dipped a finger inside her, I noticed how tight—how wet and wonderful, how warm she was. Her bare pussy shined with the light. "Open." I kissed the inside of her thigh.

She spread her legs, her eyes never leaving mine. "It's yours…if you want it."

I wished my heart would slow, swearing I was about to stroke out or some bullshit.

Then I laughed.

She smiled. "What's so funny?"

"You," I said, easing between her thighs. "When did'ju get so sexy? Huh?"

Her breath caught when she felt my cock. It barely grazed her.

"You want that?" I teased, running my dick up and down her soaked pussy.

Even if everything inside of me screamed no, my body was telling my insides to shut the fuck up.

And maybe I wasn't this good guy, especially if I was down if no one had to know, if I was down to pretend it never happen so we could carry on. I didn't like that, though, not one bit.

I'm not the type to kiss and tell, but I wouldn't want Bella to be a secret.

"What else do you want?" I asked, going down to play with her breasts again.

"Just you...right now."

"_Just_ me?" I gave her a lopsided grin, knowing she was full of shit. "You deserve better than me. I can tell you that right now. Trust…I'm no one special."

"You're wrong." Her lust-filled gaze never left mine. "And you won't let me get away. You want me. I'm in your head. I know that much about men." Bella's words…they were true. "Right now, I just want you—no strings. Tomorrow, it can be like nothing ever happened."

"No strings?"

She pulled me back to her. "It's what I want. I want you—like I've never wanted anyone."

"Fuck, baby." I palmed her cheek.

She grabbed my dick, lining us up and gasping once more, and all I had to do was push forward.

Forgetting my better judgment—again—I thrust my hips, sliding inside her.

Bella let out a cry, digging her nails into my shoulders.

I panted, her body feeling fantastic under me. Her pussy wonderful. I was lost, pumping in and out of her with no abandon, holding onto her head to get in deep, have leverage—my body taking over where my mind could not.

Our kisses were rough and passionate, almost painful as we kept knocking teeth together. It made us smile every time, but it didn't deter us.

She felt almost too good, and I had to slow down.

But I went faster, swearing I'd make her come before I did.

I don't know what Bella really feels for me, but I had to live up to whatever hype she had in her head.

"Edward…" She came, clawing at my shoulders and meeting my gaze before she clamped down on my cock tightly, milking me with her pussy, which was an amazing feeling.

I felt everything—every bit of her.

_Incredible._

_Phenomenal._

"Oh God…" she cried.

I bit my lip to stop my own scream.

She roamed her hands down to palm my ass, making me go even faster. "Give it to me…" She kept her tone low again. "One day; I swear. I won't—won't stop until you're shaking—" she moaned, kissing me crazy "—until all the neighbors know our names—we'll be screaming so loud."

"Fuck!" I went as deep as I could and let go.

All I could hear was my own heart thumping away in my chest and the ringing in my ears.

"Christ, Edward…" Bella held my shoulders again. "That was amazing." She kissed me sloppily. "I've never—"

"What…?" I panted.

"No one's ever…made me feel like that. No one's ever made me come before."

I didn't comment, but I was pretty sure she was lying.

The ego boost was a nice touch, though—an added bonus.

"I-I'm crazy about you."

It took me a minute to realize she was actually crying.

I was out of breath, palming her cheeks. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing..."

"Did I hurt you?" I was nervous, looking her over. "You—"

"No, no way. I'm happy," she said.

But that's when I heard it.

Keys jingling.

Jasper was home.

* * *

Thank you for reading.


	29. Chapter 29

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

*** PLEASE READ ***

**A few things... Many of you believe Bella was a virgin. No, she was not. Also, I know a lot of you are confused about what's truly going on between Jake and Bella. Please be patient. You'll find out soon enough. Actually, all that information is tied up in those VERY dark, intense chapters that are coming up. This is me trying to prepare you for those few chapters . . .**

**In fact, some of you may NOT even be able to read/get through those chapters (Chapter 36, sorry for the spoiler. You'll know which bc it'll have a HUGE warning).**

**I surely hope you can read it because there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and important information. Some of you will learn to understand Bella, while others will not. But hey...I try.**

**BUT don't ever say that "I" did not warn you. It will be hard to read, although I tried my best not to be THAT descriptive. However, you'll learn a lot about Bella, what's been going on with her - That's in CHAPTER 36.**

**Speaking of Bella, you guys have been too hard on our girl. LOL. In regards to Tribute Bella. Yeah, she's immature...because SHE'S 18! She's essentially a child, a teenager, and I wrote her as such. Plus, for a kid, she's really going through - ****_has_**** gone through a lot with very little help from anyone. Jasper's a great big brother, but he can't keep ALL the demons away - especially not in their world, where they're from. People are just funny. I know in most other fics, when Bella's 18 she acts like she's 35, but yeah...I wrote her young.**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

_**I**_n tears or not, Bella heard it too. Before I could make heads or tails, she pushed me away and ran up the stairs.

I did, too, quickly following after her as I fixed my pants, tucked in my shirt.

"Bella—"

She sniffled, holding her hand up. "I promised." She locked her mouth and threw away the key.

I heard Jasper downstairs. "Edward? Bells?"

We ignored him, staring at each other.

At a loss once for words, I grabbed Bella's hand and kissed it, pulling her into me.

Those actions made her crack a smile, and she lifted her hands to stroke my face.

My arms wrapped around her. "Bella, I—"

"Did you guys make it home?" We broke away; Jasper was still looking for us.

Bella disappeared into her bedroom.

"You guys home?"

She closed her door.

"Yeah!" I shouted out, righting my pants before I ran down the steps. On my way, I scooped Jake's gun. Not knowing where to put it, I placed it back into my waist. I hoped Jasper wouldn't notice as I untucked my shirt.

Jasper must have drunk the bar. The smell of alcohol was in the air. "What happened to you?" he laughed.

"Uh…" I looked down to myself.

"Did'ju get into a fight?"

I nodded. "I did…Jake…" I shrugged, shaking my head.

Jasper hopped up from the sofa, a little unsteady. "What happened?"

"Nothing. I set him straight—sent him away. As far as I know…they're done. They broke up."

"Oh. Man!" He palmed his face. "How's Bella? Is she okay? I'm glad, but wait...why'd you…?"

"He touched her…grabbed her arm. It bothered me. It's done. Nothing you gotta worry about. He won't come around here anymore."

He shook his head. "I can't deal with more crazy tonight…I'mma fuck him up, though. He touched my baby sister—"

I placed my hand on his chest. "I got him good. No worries."

He groaned. "Wish I was there to dance on his fucking head, too."

That's when I realized my heart was still pounding away. Things were cool, though. Jazz was none the wiser, and I wanted to go back upstairs very badly.

_It's too bad I can't do that._

I chuckled, wanting to make light of the subject. "I thought you didn't dance? Maybe Alice changed your mind?"

He didn't find humor in my corny attempt. "Tomorrow night, after we have dinner at Colleoni's, I'm taking Alice on a date. I don't even know how that happened!" He pulled his own hair.

I tried not to laugh.

"One minute we're drinking, the next . . . and I agreed. She looked good. Well, she always looks good. But really? It must have been the booze, bro. What the fuck?" He kicked the couch. "Now I gotta watch out for Jake—that motherfucker!"

"Relax." I chuckled.

"How is she? Is she still awake?" He went to run upstairs.

I stopped him. "She's fine, actually. Just tired. Bella said she was going to bed."

He nodded. "I need my bed, too."

"Right…I need a smoke...and a beer." I sniffed my hand, making like I was scrubbing my face while _knowing_ Bella's scent was all over me.

_I liked it._

"I'm going…" He pointed up.

"Goodnight." I patted his back before I went into the kitchen.

* * *

**Thank you for reading.**


	30. Chapter 30

Tribute

Chapter Thirty

Shit was awkward between Bella and me before, and it was even worse now.

I just had to get that statement out of my system.

The next day, all three of us went over to the Colleonis' for dinner.

Esme—who I knew as Aunt May-May—did cry when she saw me. She embraced me so tight, and I felt even more at home.

The more time I spent at their house, the more I started to remember.

Faces and circumstances, memories came back to haunt me. I was also able to place CJ in my memory.

I was too little to really know him, since he's older than me. And when I was old enough to be aware, he was away at college. It was odd. He comes off as being so street, thug-like; meanwhile, he never chilled around the way, he went to private schools, and then he went to the Ivy League?

It was like finding out a famed gangster rapper grew up in the suburbs with a mom, a dad, and a little dog, too.

Yeah, my godfather has this dachshund, a frankfurter dog that likes to bite ankles.

But I digress . . .

I met CJ's wife, too. Her name is Marie, and I was surprised he was married with a kid, no less. His wife was a knockout, a little thick from having a newborn, but she was gorgeous nonetheless. The guy truly had everything—money, a home, a wife, a kid.

So, CJ walks around like he's some big shot, mafiosi motherfucker. CJ's still who is because of who his father is . . . a position that demanded my respect in any event.

Alice ditched us and Bella before dinner was even through. She didn't mask the fact that she was excited for her date with Jasper. She needed time to get ready.

My buddy tried to look convincing, but he seemed miserable.

Bella didn't give me any looks or flirt with me while we were there. She was too preoccupied with CJ's kid, a baby girl named Bianca. Speaking of, that infant made Bella smile wider than I ever could. The baby would also cry and then shut the fuck up whenever she was in Bella's arms. After a little while, Marie leisurely sipped a glass of wine, happy about the small break Bella had given her.

Seeing old pictures of my father hit below the belt, though.

I didn't wanna see them because they made me sad.

Colleoni also pulled me into his office. He answered a few questions and spoke very freely. He told me all about the fucks who killed my pops. Their family was at war with Boston, and my father went up there to ice some big shot. No matter his status, he had to do it himself.

However, someone on his crew was playing both sides—tipped them off that he was coming—and they shot up his car before he could do anything.

Sensing how upset I was, Colleoni assured me that he didn't rest until each one that was involved was clipped.

It still didn't make me feel better.

Colleoni found out who the rat was, too—annihilated that fuck's entire family.

Again, he spoke freely, trusting that he had my confidence.

When I asked the million dollar question—why did you send me to Washington?—he told me his hands were tied. My father had put it in his will that I be sent to live with my mother, that Elizabeth Masino was to be found and become my legal guardian.

It was supposedly his biggest regret—not making it work with her.

I disagreed, swore my father would have never made that decision.

But Colleoni pulled out a large envelope and gave it to me.

It was my father's will and a list of his estate and whatnot.

I saw his wishes with my own eyes, recognizing his signature on the old paperwork.

Everything, being back to where I was, made my mind swim with all these old memories of my dad—the good times, the bad times, and Colleoni was in a few. He and my father always rolled together.

He truly was like an uncle—one I never had.

Before I left, Esme made me promise not to be a stranger.

And Colleoni pulled me over to the side. He smoked a cigar while Jasper, Bella, and Alice trailed out of the house. He wanted to talk about my future ride with Riley—what I'd be doing.

He never asked.

He just assumed.

And I didn't deny him.

I didn't think I owed him anything, but this was my birthright.

The way I saw it, I was years late to the game, and it was about time I started somewhere.

I had a lot of catching up to do.

I was in my car already, the rest entering, when Colleoni handed me a gift bag. He said it was nothing and whispered in my ear that I open it while I was alone.

After I kissed his cheek and thanked him, I placed the bag by Jasper's feet and pulled out of their driveway.

"What happened?" Jasper whispered.

I shook my head. "Where are we going?"

"Pool hall?" Alice pulled on Jasper's sleeve.

"You got it." He winked at her, mouthing "kill me" as he faced me.

I smiled, driving along the Avenue. We weren't far from the pool hall.

"What are you gonna do?" Jasper asked Bella.

In the rearview, I saw her widen her eyes. "I start work tonight at nine."

Jasper shook his head. "Where Jake can have access to you. I don't think so. I'm pulling the brother card here." He put his hands up. "You're not working at that place. Edward has nothing to do...just stay home." He was worried, I saw it in his face.

"We can watch a movie," I said.

"What?" Bella laughed. "I'm not going to Gazebo to hang out. I'd be working." Her voice got smaller as she continued. "There are bouncers and CJ . . . Jake listens to CJ—"

"Jasper has a point, though," Alice said. "I mean, I know CJ will look out for you, but I don't know if he'll be there tonight. He's still at my parents' house and all."

Bella groaned, throwing herself back. "How 'bout you, Edward? You wanna weigh in here?"

I kept my mouth shut, but I did have a few…feelings about her working there.

"Keep him outta this!" Jasper shouted, and I did a double take at the passenger side. I'd never seen Jasper that angry before. "Get a job some place else. We're doing okay. I give you an allowance—"

"Twenty bucks a week?" Bella scoffed. "You keep harping on me to get a job. I found one! I wanna help out, find some meaning to my stupid existence."

"Hey, you fucking brat—"

"Easy," I scolded Jazz, not liking his tone.

"I do the best I can with what I have," he told me.

I just nodded.

"Edward told Jake not to come near me. I think he got the hint." Bella.

"You're not working there. End of story. I make sure you're clothed, if what you wear are actually clothes," he commented on her usually skimpy attire. "I give you money—"

"And I appreciate everything, but I do want my own money. Can't you understand that? I'm fucking eighteen! There's nothing wrong with what I wear. Everyone dresses like this!" she shouted.

"Only chicks who chill out on corners—"

I placed my hand on Jasper's chest. "Be easy." That insult threw me for a loop, got me heated.

"I'm an adult...eighteen!"

"And you're acting like a five-year-old," I said. "Calm yourself."

My words ended their argument.

Bella—that naughty little thing—folded her arms across her chest and didn't say any more for the remainder of the ride. Her sad face, which always makes me sad, was ever present.

I didn't like it.


	31. Chapter 31

Tribute

Chapter Thirty-One

Bella had plenty to say after we dropped Jasper and Alice off.

I think she was trying to make me angry, get a rise out of me, but I ignored her. I wasn't going back on what I'd said about her acting like a child. My buddy has worked hard—even though she doesn't agree with how he went about it, Jasper always did his best to look out for her. He practically fucking raised her, to be exact, and Jasper didn't have to do anything.

She was acting like a brat—going on and on about how she'd never be free, like her brother was some tyrant. Bella—in my opinion—was being dramatic, over the top, and I had no idea what she was talking about half the time . . . painting Jasper this monster, something I know her brother is not.

Wordlessly and while Bella's tirade continued, I pulled into the driveway behind Jasper's car. In truth, it was only a two minute ride at best from the pool hall to back home.

Maybe I exaggerated a little, but the constant buzz of her complaints in my ear was annoying. "Are you done?" I asked.

Bella groaned, waving her fist. "I am going to work tonight." She left the car.

I shook my head, grabbing the gift bag before I followed after her. The bag had some weight to it, but I didn't peek inside.

Once in the house, Bella seemingly forgot what she was upset about. She almost made me drop the bag and stumble while I fumbled to lock the door.

Bella was on me like white on rice, like pigs flock to shit or whatever, or how a dog hops on a steak. Fuck if I know. She was on me immediately. "We're alone now." Her smile was coy, her eyes full of lust and mischief.

It took everything within me not to throw her down and fuck her senseless.

That naughty little girl.

Always tempting me with her luscious body. Her small stature made her soft curves—that only add more appeal to her hourglass figure—more lush, more feminine. She was thin with a full-figure, not too skinny, which made her perfect to me.

Her phenomenal body . . .

"You missed me, too." Her chest touched my stomach—her tits bunching together and nearly coming out of her top—and her hand was sliding down to my half-erect cock that she must have felt with her thigh. He was waking up. But I had to stop—I had to stop, had to hit the snooze button on my dick. Otherwise, all bets are off. I don't trust myself with her.

Slapping her hand away before gathering it into my own, I chuckled nervously, but I knew this was coming—had a feeling since we'd be alone. "Bella. Bella. Bella," I chanted, sort of at a loss for words.

She grinned, letting go of my hand to weave her fingers into my hair, trying to get on her toes to reach my lips. "What's wrong?" Bella stared at me, blinking a few times. "You're frowning," she murmured, dropping her gaze. "O-kay, um . . ."

I've come to realize that there are a couple versions of this woman. There's the ballsy chick with the attitude, the one with the spark and sass, who speaks her mind, comes at me, and goes for what she wants—seems confident.

Then there's this incredibly shy and insecure baby girl, who always seems so sad and depressed.

They're easy to recognize, too. Like right now, that sparkle has left her eyes, she's running cold, as if the real Bella has disappeared.

With sadness in my heart, my cock also feeling the loss, I ducked my head to be eye-level. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "Bella…we did what we did, and it was amazing." I kissed her forehead. "But it can't happen again." My hands went to rest on her hips; I quickly pulled them back. "You understand, right? Where I'm coming from?" I'd briefly spoken about it before I hit it, before we had sex. She swore she understood.

After having time to think about it, my thoughts remained the same. I realized that getting my dick wet wasn't worth sacrificing my friendship with Jasper. Or, even my friendship with Bella. If we continued to fool around behind Jasper's back, there'd be a chance one of us would fuck-up and end up hating the other.

I'm being realistic and logical, trying to ignore my attraction and my bullshit feelings.

It has nothing to do with her ex-boyfriend, but the status of our friendships is something I can't ignore—get past. None of us had heard from Jake since the night before. He hasn't even called the house looking for Bella.

I mean, I thought I was the last to get a cell phone, but as it turns out, Bella doesn't have one either.

Anyway, I'd take on Jake—that burden—for my buddy, a silent tribute to make up for sleeping with Bella.

The thought alone made me wince—wish I could go back in time.

One: I knew sleeping with Bella was wrong before and now.

Two: I wanted to do it again and again and again in the worst way imaginable. Simply because, being with her went beyond just having my shit greased.

"You're being ridiculous." She wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I'm serious," I said. "You wanted it. I wanted it . . . it was great, but we shouldn't push it." I took her arms from around me. "It was a hookup. Whatever." I walked over to the couch to have a seat.

"You're serious?" The hand went to her hip.

I palmed my face. "Please don't start." I knew I was about to get hit with the attitude. She was going to shout at me, and I wasn't in the mood. While I hate that quiet and fearful, mousy Bella, I'd gladly take her over the sassy one at the moment. I already had a headache forming.

"You're such a chickenshit!" she hollered through a chuckle. "Scared of Jasper? What's wrong with you? I saw you tonight…You wouldn't even let CJ speak to you outta turn, but you're scared of Jasper?" she ranted.

"Lower your voice," I said.

"No!" she shouted.

I growled low and under my breath, staring at her. "I'm not scared of Jasper. I respect him. There's a difference. I don't wanna lose my friendship—" I waved a hand "—even our friendship because we're fucking around and then shit doesn't work. Can you hear me now? Can you understand?" I asked.

She nodded, pursing her lips and looking away. "Right . . . I'm not good enough. I'm not worth it—"

"I never said—"

"The risk. Being with me isn't worth the risk." She still refused to face me. "I thought you were different."

"Bella—"

"No, I understand perfectly well now. It's one thing to believe it yourself, but to learn that someone you—" she never finished that train of thought, her voice rising "So, then...What the fuck was I…? Huh?"

"Listen—" I blew out a calming breath "You are most certainly worth—"

"Just answer my question! What. Was. I?" She was angry, fire in her eyes.

"Are you ever going to let me speak? Tell you why, so I can explain?" I asked.

Her foot tapped, her arms folded over her chest. "I just wanna know what I was...to you. I wanna hear you say I was nothing more than a piece of ass—then I'll know you're like most guys." Her voice had dropped, and I didn't hear the last thing she'd mumbled.

Thinking back, I remembered exactly what she said. Bella wanted to be my slut, and…maybe I didn't treat her as such last night. But right now, the lines were getting blurry. The last thing I'd consider her was a ho, and I hated that she got that impression, but we'd gone into it—us fucking—as a mutual understanding. And I told her...she knew exactly what I wanted. She knew from the get I wouldn't/couldn't be her boyfriend.

What was this?

Why was I getting the third degree?

I didn't deserve to be spoken to that way, nor my feelings—my true qualms and anxieties—held with such disregard. She swore she understood.

Angry, I left the couch to tower over her. "What do you want from me?" I asked.

She opened her mouth to reply, cowering away from me—which was a drastic change—but it was my turn to speak.

"You said no strings. You said that, not once but twice," I held up two fingers "—and now I'm the bad guy?"

Her lip quivered, yet she didn't utter a word. She wasn't crying either.

"What? Bella, talk to me. You want me to be your boyfriend? Tell me what you want, Bella." I backed off, seeing as how she seemed cautious, although not necessarily afraid. "I'll try—see if I can comply." I was truly losing my temper at this point, too.

Her silence—now of all times, when I wanted an answer—was grating on my nerves.

"What the fuck do you want from me?" My tone was almost pleading. "You baited me…I played your game, and you wanted to fuck me. You got it. You played me...What else, huh?"

She put her hands up. "I don't want anything from you. I-I don't want anything from anyone. Stay away from me!" Bella ran upstairs.

I turned and grabbed a couch pillow to scream into it before falling down onto the sofa.

When I was finished with my mini-meltdown, I went upstairs to piss and then I sought out Bella. I'd realized that while our conversation had turned heated, it bothered me to think she might be upset. Bella is frustrating, but I still cared way too much about her—I had to see with my own eyes that she was okay.

In my mind, she shouldn't have lost a wink of sleep over her joke of an ex-boyfriend—that's how unimportant he was—and she damn sure better not be sad about me. I'm just as inconsequential.

Nevertheless, I know—young or old—some women carry their hearts around in their pussies . . .

I might have punctured Bella's heart with my cock.

Men don't have the same problems . . .

Well, I used to believe that, used to be able to differentiate, and not get emotional after tapping it once. But since Bella and I fucked, I've been all the more confused.

Bella. Bella. Bella.

She could do so much better than me.

My personal temptress had her music blasting and her door open just an inch.

Peeking in, I saw her getting ready for the job she'd never do. I wasn't going to budge on Jasper's decision, or on my own thoughts as well.

Bella was teary-eyed, yet putting on her earrings and swaying to the beat in the background. As I took a closer look, I spied the waitress uniform from Gazebo—tight black top with black short-short shorts.

Even angrier, I pushed her door opened more. "You're not leaving the house like that."

She pointed. "Get the fuck outta my room!"

I raised a brow, smirking and throwing myself onto her bed. "No."

Bella grabbed her purse. "I'll be early…but if you won't leave…I'll go." She went for the door.

I rolled my eyes, going after Bella, stomping down the hall to catch up to her. "See? I chased you. It's what you wanted, right?"

"Fuck you." She hit my chest.

I grinned. "You did. Last night."

She tried to scowl at me but then her mouth morphed into this breathtakingly beautiful smirk. "Don't make me smile."

I started to tickle her sides, not letting her go. "You're not leaving the house like that." I couldn't imagine it.

Every guy at that place stared at the waitresses—I did, too—along with gawking at the other chicks dancing—I did, too.

It was a total meat market, a place where people went to get drunk and hook up.

Most clubs are.

"Ugh. Edward!" She drawled. "Stop."

I let her go. "And if Jake approaches you?"

"He's not going to do anything. He gets handsy, but…maybe I miss him." Her chin came up in defiance, a newfound confidence, but I hoped she was full of shit.

"Excuse me?" It was like she hit me in the gut, her saying she missed that bastard, full of it or not.

She shrugged. "He slept with Lauren. I slept with you, and you kicked his ass . . . Maybe we're even?"

Something dawned on me, and I was 100% positive now. "You're just fucking with me."

She furrowed her brow. "Why would I fuck with you, Edward?" Her tone was condescending, a tad bit sarcastic. "We're friends. I can be honest. We agreed to no strings…I was buggin' before, thinking and wanting more….Maybe me and Jake belong together." She went for the stairs.

I yanked her into me. "I—" I was dumbfounded once again.

"What?" she asked.

"You know what…?" I backed away, let her go. "You and Jasper can…have it out about your job. I dunno." I ran down the stairs before her. Knowing Bella was trying to play me again, I refused to give in or let her toy with me. "Be safe...I hope you make great tips."

Over by the couch, I grabbed the gift bag to look inside.

"What?" Bella asked, gripping the banister as she grilled me with her narrowed eyes.

"Hmm?" I stared at her legs. They were meaty and looked longer in those shorts. "You look nice. The uniform suits you. I'm sure you'll grab...every fucker's...eye. You'll make loads of dough." I gritted my teeth, and I'd barely gotten those words out.

Bella raised a brow.

"What's up?" I asked, going for nonchalance.

She scoffed. "Goodnight." Bella trailed down the remaining steps, and then she was out the door.

When I heard the click of the lock, I dug the box out of the bag.

And inside the box was a Smith & Wesson .357 with a silencer and a cartridge full of bullets.

There was a note that said, "Use me wisely," and I had no idea what that meant.

I had an idea . . .

I appreciated this gift immensely, and that's when it all came crashing down—my new life, which would have just been my life if I'd never moved away, what I was getting myself into and whatnot, and I also had some thoughts and worries about the future—how or why I'd be using my new gun.

The concept wasn't as daunting as most would think . . . not to me. Not when I was accustomed to wielding weapons ten times the size, going on missions with the intent to fuck some shit up—take out our enemies.

Well, Uncle Sam's enemies.

It is what it is.

I was very well trained in warfare. Hand-to-hand combat, and I missed the action.

Working for my godfather will be different...by leaps and bounds.

While I can't imagine the things I'll have to do—being the lowest guy they have, needing to work my way up the ladder—I had a feeling the same rules might still apply.

The Few. The Proud. The Strong.

Semper Fidelis, like the tattoo on my chest says.

Always faithful.

Always loyal.

It'd be survival of the fittest—where the weakest links won't make it—it was almost as if I was trained for this.

This role.

And maybe I was tipsy, but I fully understood Riley's intent that night at Gazebo.

I had to place my faith, my loyalty in my godfather, trust him. A part if me already did. No longer was I wary. Because I'd understood him, where he was coming from, all too well . . .

Before I could ponder or dwell any more, I pushed that all into the back of my head, into the filing cabinet that's my brain.

It took seconds for me to load my new piece and place it in my waist.

Once it was concealed by my shirt, I flew out the door to go after Bella.


	32. Chapter 32

Tribute

Chapter Thirty-Two

To my surprise—to my complete and utter astonishment—I didn't have to travel that far at all to find Bella.

She was sitting on the stoop. "Took you long enough," she said, craning her neck to stare up at me. "I was beginning to think you wouldn't—"

"Chase you?" I let out a sigh of relief, sitting next to her, my insides calming at the sight of her.

She nodded, studying her shoe. "I never saw Jasper that mad before. For whatever reason, he doesn't want me working there, so...I don't know what to do."

"You should respect him. You know?" I was so happy she hadn't gone far. That I didn't have to find her. Really. Truly and deeply happy, and the relief I felt . . . Christ.

Bella was here, sitting next to me, and she was safe and sound. She was close enough to touch, too, but I couldn't.

"I know," she whispered, scooting closer to me.

"What are we going to do?" I asked, placing a cautious arm around her—a friendly gesture—one that I couldn't help.

Stupid arm, having a mind of its own and all, aching to hold Bella.

What horse shit!

Get it together, Masino!

Before I continued, I stiffened, loving the way she fit nestled into my side. I didn't dare squeeze her, or give any indication that I was elated with our current positions.

When I opened my eyes, I noticed she still wore a frown, her eyes seeming in a daze. "We can't keep fighting like this...living like this," I said, my tone hushed.

Once again, I was aware of the mistake we'd made.

And the fact that it was a mistake felt like a betrayal to my own wants and needs—when my body practically screams for this girl.

She puffed her cheeks. "What am I gonna do? CJ didn't hire the one he wanted with experience, so I'd have a job." She pointed to herself. "What am I supposed to say? Jasper says no? That'll just welcome him to approach Jazz. I don't want any trouble."

"Just relax." I dug my cell out of my pocket. "You should call him—let him know. He's a big brother, too. He'll understand."

She frowned. "If he doesn't?"

"He will," I assured her.

"Do you know how much money I could make, though? I'm not being a brat. I'm being realistic."

I nodded. "What if I paid your tuition? Take the burden away from your brother. Jasper wouldn't have to work as hard, and you won't feel bad about it. Right?"

"No way. That'd just be weird…" she giggled.

I loved that sound, it made me smile wide. "Not really. It's not weird at all. I have the money . . . And hey, if it'd make you feel better, you could always pay me back." I nudged her arm, playfully.

Even so, I wouldn't have that.

Sending Bella to school would be my pleasure.

"Plus, you wanna do hair. You can give me a free buzz from time-to-time." I chuckled, trailing my hand through my hair. It was getting longer, something I wasn't used to.

She stared at the top of my head, or tried to, leaning up and in to me. "You shouldn't cut it." Bella snapped out of her stupor, slightly shaking her head and licking her lips. "Taking care of me...in that way, is something Jasper does. It's brotherly?" She winced. "Then again...I mean, unless—" her hand touched my thigh "—it wouldn't be weird if we were, you know. It's not odd if your man pays—"

I pushed that sneaky, irresistible paw away. "Cut it out. Please. Just stop." My tone wasn't harsh. I was actually soft spoken, nearly pleading that she stop tempting me so.

"You're serious?" she asked, although I don't think she was referring to me paying for her schooling.

"Are we going to argue this back and forth, too?" I kind of snapped.

So much for soft spoken.

"And are we going to continue fighting about that other shit...? Both points?" I wondered why everything had to be an argument. It's on me, too, not only Bella—as this woman clearly gets me heated, brings out the worst in me at times. "Do you really wanna be my secret...my mistress?" I was confused. "I had a great time last night, but waking up this morning—"

Bella gasped, a very low sound, like her breath caught. "You think it was a mistake?" She pointed to me.

I nodded—I hated to do it—but I nodded my head yes. "I know it was...Baby, my reluctance..." I touched my chest "—it comes from a good place. I wanna know you and Jasper forever. I cherish you guys as my friends. Please understand that...Us fooling around will complicate things. God forbid, we don't work out—whatever we'd be. I don't wanna lose you guys. You and Jasper—you're my family, the only family I have." Gazing back to her after my ramblings, I saw she wore a frown.

"That's not true, about having no one. You have Mr. Colleoni and CJ and—"

"No," I whispered. "I don't have anyone besides you and Jasper." And that's truly how I saw it. They were what mattered most. "I don't have any friends yet...being practically the new kid on the block." I tried my best at a joke, and I sucked.

She didn't smile. "Oh...I thought—never mind." Her shoulders slumped. She was quiet for a while after that unfinished thought.

I was nervous as fuck. I was afraid I might have lost her anyway—lost her friendship, lost her being a constant in my life, which means more to me than anything, more than having her perfect body pressed against mine, more than my selfish needs as a man, more than...more than...my heart protesting at the thought of her possibly belonging to someone else.

I needed Bella in my life, and if we continued . . . I knew I'd fuck it up.

I gave her hand a squeeze. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too." Her lip quivered. "I thought you were getting close to CJ." She seemed more heartbroken about that.

"What?" I was confused.

"Nothing . . . I'll go call, tell him I can't work there." She stood up, staring down to cup my cheek. "I'll lie—say that Jake doesn't want me working there. They're close, but now you—I mean, if you're not—"

"Whoa!" I exclaimed. "Just tell him the truth . . . Jake and CJ close?" I thought that was laughable, letting out a short chuckle since CJ told me to stay away from Jake. They obviously weren't as affiliated as Bella thought.

"It doesn't matter what I tell him now." She turned and went inside.

"Bella, wait—"

She let the screen slam, slightly closing the door.

Following after her, I saw her pick up the telephone mounted on the kitchen wall. Once again, if she was upset . . . Could I soothe her, too? Could I deny her advances but be her friend? I was going to try. "Bella—"

"We're cool. No worries." She gave me a small smile.

I opened my mouth, but then I closed it—the thought having ran away from me. Although that grin was fake, I'd take it for the time being.

With nothing better to do, I took a seat on the couch again. I waited for Bella to finish her phone call. By the sounds of it, CJ understood. There were no hard feelings.

She didn't say goodnight before she ran upstairs.

She ignored me when I tried to talk, and then she ran up to her bedroom.

Maybe I needed to give her time?

I hoped so—that it was so simple—while I got comfortable on the sofa watching TV.

After drinking a few beers, I figured Jasper must be having a decent time. He said he'd be out until ten the latest, yet it was going on midnight.

Tired as fuck, knowing I'd be opening the pizzeria with Ruffalo tomorrow—by myself—I trailed up the stairs, needing my bed. Jasper has some lab tomorrow and is going to be at school late.

Having the keys now, I offered to open the shop.

It was going to be interesting.

Before I closed my door, I stood in the hall and heard something odd. It took me a minute to figure out it was Bella crying.

What was wrong with her? I thought.

She couldn't possibly be this upset over not working at that club, or Jake, or even me?

My baby was legitimately sobbing, and I better not be the cause.

"Hey…" I knocked twice yet opened the door anyway.

Bella was face down in her bed, hugging her blankets and pillows.

"Bella?" I walked in, waiting for her to face me.

"Just leave me alone," she whispered.

"No…" I wanted to sit on her bed, coddle her, which would have been something I wouldn't have thought twice about . . . before last night. "Talk to me."

She shook her head, a whimper escaping.

I sighed, biting the bullet and crawling right in there. "It's just me, remember? You used to tell me things…when something was bothering you." Sometimes, way back when, I won't deny that I'd often act like more of a big brother than my friend. But at the end of the day, they have that closeness—something I never had with anyone besides Jasper, too. But from what I've been told, Bella hasn't opened up to him lately either.

"It's different now."

I nodded. "You can still trust me."

"I know."

I waited for her to talk and she said nothing. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "You're young, and I should have—"

"What?" She whipped around to me. "You think I'm this upset because of you?" She spat.

I didn't know how to respond, but then it dawned on me and my dumb ass.

"I—" Bella had something on the tip of her tongue.

"Baby, just say it. Please." Knowing she has been upset for a while, that something was going on with her before I arrived, making her depressed, I urged her to continue. "Open up. Talk to me. Tell me what's been going on. Please."

"I can't." Her face crumbled, and she let out a cry through her nose. "It's you...you have my tears, too." My gut told me she was lying. Especially since—when it comes to us—she seems to have no problems voicing what she wants, or what's bothering her.

"Come here." I placed my arms around her, making her sit in my lap. "You can. You can talk to me. Tell me anything." I placed a soft kiss in her hair.

She fought her way out of the embrace, trying not to cry, her face angry again. "Lemme guess...You think that you should have known better because of how young I am?"

I shook my head. "Stop it. You were doing this at the club, too. Making up a bullshit issue to thwart your brother. While this isn't bullshit—our issues—I want you to tell me what's been going on. The truth, Bella." I grabbed her shoulders, made her look at me.

She wasn't trying to hear any of it, talking over me. "Trust me; I'm a big girl. There's no need for you to feel guilty. I knew there was a chance that—that we'd never screw again or even be together. But I guess I thought too highly of you—that YOU wouldn't—couldn't treat me like some whore. Use me and fuck me with your stupid penis! I thought—I thought you were better than that. Out of all the guys, I thought you were special."

I was apologetic. "I'm sorry I can't be what you want." And it saddened me because I wanted to be that guy.

"That's the thing!" She slammed her pillow down, getting on her knees and coming close. "You're everything I want." She sobbed again, yet held my face. "Can't you see—" she kissed me ever-so softly, just went for it, and she left my mouth burning when she pulled away "—you're everything," she whispered, her lips ghosting over my own, trailing down to my jaw.

"Stop." I breathed.

She listened, staring at me, her hands that were on my shoulders were now shaking.

It was hard to swallow as I leaned farther away from her, but I wanted to kiss her again so badly. My stomach tied in knots, my heart about to leap out of my chest . . .

"Look at me." I reached to palm her cheek, and her forehead came to rest against mine. "I'm flattered, honored that you feel this way. But besides everything I told you earlier, which is the absolute truth…I'm barely here a week, and you're hitting me with all these deep feelings—telling me these emotional things. I just—Bella, I'm confused. A few months ago, I was across the planet, and now I'm here…everything has changed…" I shrugged, trailing off. "You hardly know me, the person I am now. How can you.."

But I knew…Bella was in fact playing a game.

It was just different from the one I'd thought of.

Bella didn't tease me.

She had always intended on following through.

But she threw all that "no strings" garbage at me because she knew I was only looking for a hookup.

She was trying to be what I needed, so she could get the end result she wanted.

Yet, she couldn't leave it at that.

And I knew—deep down inside, before we'd fucked—that she couldn't leave it at that, a petty hookup which was anything but petty.

And I fell right into her trap, knowing it all, but I wasn't thinking logically.

I thought with my cock last night.

Using my brain, I could understand how Bella would form an attachment, feel a connection.

While I felt I barely knew her, it hurt to call what we did a mistake, and walk away. We do have a connection—one that had formed back when we were babies.

The love we have, caring for one another—the way in which we do—just morphed into something else entirely.

"I have a million and one things going through my head." I pointed to my temple. "I'm asking you to be my friend. Be easy until I can sort through some shit. Don't...flirt, don't tempt me." I chuckled. "I need to think, and I can't think when you...do what you do," I laughed.

She smiled, and maybe she dug my words, all the raw honesty.

I know I wasn't used to this, feeling as though I'd exposed my soul. "It's not about...not wanting you. Bella, you hafta believe me. You have to believe me. I do. I had the best time last night..." My breath hitched as I stared at her lips, her nose touching mine, my hand on her cheek firm.

And it took everything not to go in for it.

"Gimme time, baby," I pleaded, dropping my gaze and my hand.

And maybe without Bella throwing herself at me—without her throwing salt into my open wound—I could figure things out for real. Maybe some time soon I'll explain everything to Jasper. Maybe he'll understand that I'm not just interested in sex, in using his sister and playing the field. He'll know that I could never hurt her.

Bella would be safe with me as soon as I had my thoughts together.

"I understand. I'm sorry for pushing you." She sniffled, backing off of me entirely. "I should have let you be—let you screw a skank. Oh, wait. You did." Her eyes widened.

"Don't call yourself that," I said. "Don't ever . . . Come here." The air in the room had suddenly shifted, wasn't as heavy as I patted the spot next to me.

But Bella chose to hug my torso and rest her head on my stomach. "See? I feel better . . . just holding you. Eddie, you make all the bad go away. You don't understand. No one does."

I grinned, pulling her hair away from her neck. Maybe she frustrates me, but Bella was a total doll, fucking adorable while also being sinfully sexy.

And I loved this.

Shit.

I felt better just being here, too—being here for her, soothing her, even if I might be the reason she's miserable.

"What's this?" She felt my heat. "Oh…that's what was in the bag?"

"Yes," I said.

"Can I see it?"

"Sure." I took it out.

She sat up to grab it from me. "This is nice, heavier than a nine." I didn't like the way she admired it. It gave me the creeps for some reason.

"Yeah…nice." I took it back to place it on her nightstand.

"Have you ever had a girlfriend before?"

"No." I shook my head. "I've dated…it just doesn't go very far. We fuck a few times and that's it. Apparently, I have issues letting others get to know me...?" I shrugged. "At least, that's what the last few broads said. After two people say the same thing, you gotta figure it's true."

Bella smiled. "You—you would'a let them in, into your heart when you were ready."

"Is it that simple? Waiting?" I hoped my honesty would make it so I'd earn her trust, so that maybe she'd open up to me . . . about other things, whatever plagues her mind.

"I think that, yeah." She nodded. "Trust...I used to give it away. Now, I do believe it should be earned. It's scary, though, thinking you might never trust another person again."

"Right . . ."

"But then realizing you already trust them. That's scarier," she whispered.

"Do you trust me?" I asked, pretty sure she had been speaking of me.

She quirked a brow. "You trust me?"

I smirked at that clever little minx. "You ever date anyone other than Jake?"

"No…He was my first." She grimaced, hugging her blanket to her chest. "I—"

I stayed quiet, hoping she'd elaborate.

When the silence became deafening, I started rubbing her back.

"Last night...I never felt what I did last night, being with you. I always thought something was wrong with me—that I was broken." Her voice was very low. If I wasn't concentrating, I would have missed it.

"You're not broken," I said. "There's nothing wrong with you. You're perfect. I mean, maybe you weren't ready when you slept with Jake? It's possible. We all mature at different times."

She nodded.

"You might not even be ready now."

She sucked her teeth. "Be serious."

"I am...Don't be in such a rush to grow up. You're a kid, enjoy it. Sex shouldn't be important to you right now. It was to me at eighteen, but there were more important things to concern myself with. If I could go back and tell myself that now...I would, so I'm telling you. Think about it, before you give away the gold to undeserving fucktards."

She stared right into my eyes, and I saw lust, the same shit from that night. "I look at you, and...it's all I wanna do now." Her cheeks flushed crimson, and she looked away.

Fucking . . . ditto, baby.

Ditto.

I blew out a breath.

"But other than you...never. I wasn't lying when I said that last night." She chanced a glance at me.

I dug the compliment, but . . .

I figured letting it zoom over my head was the gentlemanly thing to do, since I didn't know how to reply.

Saying "thank you" would make me sound cocky.

"Like I said...we all develop differently. I-I don't know much about women and their orgasms," I laughed, about to embark on unchartered territory.

"I think you know plenty." She poked my stomach.

"Yeah, how to give 'em. Whatever." I rolled my eyes.

"Like a sex God."

"No . . ." I shook my head. "I try to do my best, enjoy myself. It's no fun if your partner isn't having a good time. Is it?" I chuckled, nervous.

She shrugged. "Tell me."

"Tell you?" I furrowed my brow. "I thought...Last night wasn't your first time. Was it?" I needed to make sure I didn't spoil that for her. I'd purposely tell Jasper just so he'd kick my ass, rightfully so.

"No...I've done it. I told you, but keep talking." She stared expectantly.

"Okay. You know how sex is an obvious give and take?"

"Women give and men take." She nodded.

"No. Men should be equally, if not more giving. Lemme tell you something. With full access to...the, uh, gold...the honey pot...unless your dude is fucked in the head, has a lot on his mind—because that can hinder it, too—or he's gotta physical problem with his dick, he's gonna...make it to the money shot—"

"Money shot?" she giggled.

"His grand finale," I laughed, too. "And never feel badly or uncomfortable if you're not feeling it. You show that fucko the door. Most dudes can take the hint." I'd experienced that years ago, wasn't so fluent in... gold or honeypots. "You let...open the door, he has access to your...castle, he's gonna enjoy it no matter what you do." I didn't want to get into dead lays and whatnot, 'cause it's not like she's one of them.

Little firebug, passion-bug is more like it.

And I didn't want her to be self-conscious the next time she—

I couldn't think about that.

"What was it like for you? Being with me?" she asked.

I bit my lip, grabbing her hand to place a kiss on her knuckles. "I felt like the luckiest dude on the planet, like a king, getting the keys to the castle, because of how special you are. Don't doubt that. I bet I enjoyed myself more than you."

"Not possible. And you can say pussy, Edward. I hear you and Jasper talk."

I ignored that. "The keys to the castle are...it's possibly the best gift you could ever give a man. You should hold your key close...until you think...Prince Charming has finally come along. And, back to our original discussion, getting women off is trickier, as you know, especially with a selfish lover." I hoped we were done.

She frowned. "Yeah...Guess I'm tricky? Since I never had one with—uh, besides you?"

"No, you weren't difficult...I barely had to do a thing."

She hit me with her pillow.

My smile stayed in place. "Chicks can fake it, but I try to make it my business to tell the difference. Again, I try...who the fuck really knows? All I know is that, as a man, you never wanna be the guy who has to ask afterward. After all, if I'm doing the right thing, I won't have to. You know? Plus, broads talk...Let's say it wasn't you. I got busy with someone else. I didn't hit it right, and then she tells a friend who tells another friend, and I'm some chump?"

"At least you ask—I mean, at least you care—regardless of reasoning." She tripped over her words. "You care whether or not you make your girl come, which—" She stopped talking.

"Rewind. Go back to that last thought." I gave her shoulder a squeeze. "Ask, what? I just said I didn't ask, which I didn't last night."

"Not important."

"Ask permission?!" That was the only thing I'd asked last night in regards to the act itself. "Bella—"

"No! I—what were you saying?" she spluttered.

With the knot back in my stomach, I hugged her tighter to me. "Tell—tell me more about Jake." I didn't want to assume a motherfucking thing—no matter what my mind conjured. If I did, if I jumped to conclusions, Bella would clam up and not tell me a fucking thing. "Tell me what you saw in him—what being with him was like."

"Why are you mad?" She lifted her head.

I pushed her hair away from her face, hoping there was a neutral expression on mine. "I'm not. Just...I wanna hear you talk." I pinched her cheek.

It made Bella giggle. "We got together right after Gram died. Well, I told you that."

"You did." That piece-of-shit took advantage of her while she was vulnerable, probably during the worst time in her life.

Shit definitely wasn't over between Jake and me.

Again, it didn't matter what he did or didn't do.

"I went out with Emmett first. Rosalie, Alice's cousin?" she asked; I nodded. "She was gonna to go out with Jake. And we all went out as a group. Alice was with this guy, Ben." She shook her head. "Anyway, Jake liked me, and Rosalie had already ditched Jake for Emmett, who only had eyes for Rosalie . . ."

"You didn't like Jake from the get-go?" I asked.

She ignored that. "You—"

"He just...he said you were his and you went along with it? Being his girl?" That happening around here isn't surprising, not with how young Bella is. And last year, she was what? Barely seventeen, Jake was twenty-one or some bullshit?

It makes me no better, but...I haven't been the one pursuing or pressuring Bella.

I heard her swallow, and then she sat up again. "No . . . I guess I liked him, too, in the beginning. He was nice."

I nodded, but regardless of understanding the slightest bit, I was pissed at Jasper. That he could let Bella get mixed up with someone like Jake. "He was nice in the beginning and then changed? He's been fucked-up to you. Please, tell me. Tell me what—"

"No." Tears filled her eyes. "It's done now, right?"

"Hardly," I said. "Trust me, Bella. Trust me like you did last night. Please. Tell me everything."

"I—"

I nodded, encouraging her. "Does he hit you? Does he force himself on you? What? I'm getting certain vibes here." My sanity was on edge.

"You're mad." She scooted away from me.

"No, Bella-Boo, I'm not mad," I lied, smiling. "You think I'm mad and you scoot away. That speaks volumes." Her cowering away when I'd raised my voice earlier made sense. And I promised myself I wouldn't get angry, scare her, no matter what she said. But Jake was a dead man. "He's physical, a lot more than handsy as you said. Just—"

"No." She drew in a shaky breath. "I'm sorry. I can't—I can't give you the answers you want."

"Because...?"

"They're not, not true." She was lying, averting her gaze. "I don't wanna talk anymore. I'm tired."

My chest felt tight again. "He hasn't done any of those things? Baby, you walk around like you're battered—"

She shook her head. "No, no, no." Bella was crying again. "How—"

"I guess I just opened my eyes." I fisted her sheets tightly. "Tell me."

"No...It's not true. I swear. I've just been...depressed? When Gram died—"

"You're bullshitting me again."

"I'm not!" she shouted.

I put my hands up in surrender. "I—I'd hope, if there was? If he was hurting you in such a way, you would have told someone."

"He hasn't!" She got loud, defensive again. "I-I have problems. I'm—Jake says—he says—he loves me."

"Does he now?" I snorted. "Trust me. If he's doing what I think he does—"

"No!"

"He doesn't love you. He probably never has, and you don't have the problem. He does. Only a pussy would raise a hand to a woman—one as small as you—"

"He doesn't!" she shouted. "Leave my room."

I nodded, leaving her bed. "If that's what you want." Our discussion was far from over. I'd come at her again, ask the same things, and I'd kill Jake.

Once I was by the door, I saw Bella hit herself in the face, slapped her own cheek.

In quick strides, I pulled her wrist away. "What the fuck was that?" I sat back in her bed.

"I'm dumb." Tears fell down her cheeks. "I hate my stupid, disgusting face, my fat body."

"What...?" I thought I might cry. "Bella, you're not dumb. Your face...don't ever. Okay? Don't ever think that. You're gorgeous. Your body is perfect."

She was crying. "I—I hit myself a lot. If you ever saw bruises, they're my fault."

"Talk to me, beautiful." I held her chin. "You want honesty? You want the truth? My heart is breaking right now...I know he—"

"He didn't." She was quiet. The real Bella had disappeared, and it was my fault.

"Okay," I whispered. "He didn't. I believe you." I really didn't.

She blinked. "You should remind Jasper of that."

"What?" I shook my head.

"He used to be so close to Emmett." She eased back down into my arms, nestled into my side.

I huffed a breath, staring at her ceiling. "Bella—"

"Nothing happened to me. Nothing. I'm just fucked in the head, as you put it." She faced me.

"I never said you were—"

"I know. I'm just saying. I'm crazy and I get sad, but Jasper..." Her eyes glazed over. "He won't have to worry about me soon—not anymore."

"Why?"

"I promised to be better," she whispered. "To lose weight, be happier, listen."

"You don't need to lose a pound, and you're fantastic—a great person. I wanna help you. Whatever it is, you tell me."

She ignored me, leaning her head on my chest now. "In a way, I'm glad they stopped hanging out." I didn't know what she was getting at now. "But only because…if Jasper and Emmett stayed close, my brother would have probably taken Jake's place—gotten into that stuff with Emmett." Just like her brother, Bella sort of came full-circle.

"Can you understand?" I asked. "You and Emmett went on one date—one." Closing my eyes tightly, I internally cringed, images of last night flooding my mind, and my muscles coiled at my dick's realization of having her in my arms again.

"I get it." She sniffled, hugging me tighter. "It's a secret. I'm good at keeping secrets—"

"You're telling me." I tickled her side.

There were a million things I still wanted to ask—needed answers for. But she's great at the deflection shit.

"I haven't even told Alice. No worries. I won't tell Jasper…and we can forget it happened."

"Don't forget, okay? It just...it happened." I rubbed her back to calm her some more. "I should go to bed."

"Yeah…"

"You need money? I'll wake you up. Come work at Sal's tomorrow," I said.

"No way. I meant what I told Jasper. I'm not spending my summer making minimum wage in that sweltering heat—"

"Oh, I thought we'd be able to spend more time together." Half of that was bullshit, bait to see if she'd bite, while the other half . . . wanted to spend more time with her, get to know her as a person better, keep an eye on her, too, since I was concerned.

"Really?"

I yawned. "Yup."

She hummed. "I don't know."

I didn't say anything, my eyelids feeling heavy. "I should go to my room."

"Yeah," she sighed, and that was the last thing I remembered her saying.


	33. Chapter 33

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

"What the fuck?" Jasper shouted.

I barely registered it was him, my eyes closing again because I was so comfortable.

"Get up!" he practically screamed. "Get the fuck off my sister!"

"Fuck!" I scrambled to get out from _under_ Bella, and then I fell on the floor. "It's not what you think."

"Tell me what I think, Edward?" Jasper asked, staring down at me.

He was in boxers and nothing else.

Gazing at Bella's alarm clock, it was 3:40a.m. We'd been sleeping a while.

"Uh…" I was stuck.

"Jazz, you're being stupid." Bella wiped the sleep out of her eyes. "Did you just get home?"

"Never mind about me," he said, staring daggers at me. "I invite you into my home—"

"Whoa." I stood up. "Wait a fucking minute, and don't go there. She was upset. I came in to sit with her, and we fell asleep." I gestured between Bella and me. "We're also _fully clothed_. But it's funny you should give a fuck now—"

"What's that supposed to mean?" he hollered back.

I gritted my teeth, about to tear him a new one for letting her get with Jake. Deep down, I didn't think it was his fault, but Jasper should have done something, anything. Still, I don't know what that asshole Jake did, or had been doing to Bella, but I was going to find out.

It'll validate my motives—which at the moment were empty—for killing him.

"Jake?" I asked. "You failed to protect—"

"Guys, stop!" Bella hopped between us, pushing our chests away. She looked to me. "You're making shit up. Nothing happened, so don't fight." She was lying through her teeth.

"Nothing happened?" I asked, and I couldn't help the scoff that escaped.

"Nothing, Edward. You should mind your own business."

At her request, I put my hands up, backing away.

My plans for Jake hadn't changed, though.

"What's that?" She flicked her brother's neck, her eyes becoming huge like saucers. "No!"

Jazz had a hickey, and my anger ebbed, just slightly.

He placed his hand on his neck, covering the mark. "It looked like you two were, uh—"

"What's going on?" Alice poked her head in, her naked body wrapped in a sheet.

"Oh, get the fuck outta hea!" I laughed, clapping my hands. "Bravo."

"You gotta be fucking kidding me!" Bella shouted. "You did it—you—" She stopped talking.

Alice grinned and waved to us. "Hey...um, this is awkward."

"Get out!" Bella left her bed. "Everyone out."

I went to leave.

At this late hour, maybe I could break in to Jake's apartment.

No, I'd relish in taking him out in front of his friends. That way, who'd ever avenge him, would know I was no one to fuck with.

"Not you…" Bella pulled me back by my sleeve. "You two!" She pushed Jasper out, and Alice followed after.

"Bella!" he shouted.

She closed the door on them and faced me. "What the fuck?"

I shrugged. "Good for him."

"No...you saying that shit," she scolded through a whisper.

I wasn't sorry. "There's a lot you're not telling me."

"I'm telling you now. If you know what's good for you, you'll drop it."

"What's _good_ for _me_?" I chuckled.

"What's it to you anyway? You're not my man—" she hit my chest "—you're not anything."

"What's going on?" Jasper shouted, still outside her door.

"Right..." I nodded, answering Bella. A little hurt since . . . although I'm not sure what I am, I thought I was _somebody_ to Bella.

"I'm sorry." She jumped at me to hug me.

I rubbed her back, but I didn't say a word.

Bella left the embrace. "And now them?" She held her forehead, looking up to me. "Did you say 'good for him'? He'll never get rid of her now…and that's—that's CJ's little sister."

"We can hear you!" Alice shrieked. "You wanna get rid of me?" It sounded like she asked Jasper that.

_What'd they have their ears pressed to the door?_

"Just go in my room." Jazz told her.

I groaned. "When can I go to _my_ room?" I asked no one in particular.

Bella cleared her throat and opened her door. "Jasper…?" Her tone was business-like.

"Yes?" He raised a brow.

"What if…what if I asked Edward on a date?"

He cackled. "You? You're not exactly his type." He faced me. "Dude, I'm sorry for getting all—"

"What if I _was_ his type?"

"Let it go," I said, leaving the room. Now definitely wasn't the time.

"Wait…" Jasper said. "_What?!_" Confused as ever, his head whipped between his sister and me.

"Nothing." Bella drawled, slamming her door closed.

"What she said." I shut mine.

"What is going on?" Jasper asked the hallway.

Neither one of us answered, and I kept my back against my door—so many things coming to mind.

It had been a long night.

Bella and I had said many things, yet I was clueless as to where we stood.

Still, after all those fucking words, and not having a clue—

"Is Jazzy-the-Tiger ready for round two...?" Alice giggled.

I turned around grimacing. I mean, Jazzy-the-Tiger? What the fuck was that? Believe it or not and by her tone alone, Alice sounded tame and timid, when she's usually this...slutty...elf on crack.

She's...I don't know. Mad fucking loud and bubbly? It's not a bad thing. That's just who she is—intrusive and oh-so fucking loud.

Jasper's nothing like that; her complete opposite.

At least that's what I thought until I heard a loud, feral growl echo in the hallway.

It sounded like my friend.

And it was followed by more giggles and his door slamming.

Smiling, happy he was getting laid, I got right into bed.

Sleep didn't come as easily this time around because Jasper's headboard was knocking against the wall.

I was slightly disappointed when the sound only lasted four minutes . . .

_Don't ask me why I was counting, stared at my alarm clock._

_Morbid curiosity, I guess._

Alas, my hope was restored when it was merely a pause. The furious banging continued on two minutes after that.

In all, I tossed and turned for what seemed like an hour.

_I wasn't really keeping track of that._

It sucked since I couldn't sleep the day away. At 11:30a.m., I had to open the pizzeria. Fuck. Jasper has to leave for school before nine. He was going to feel it, yet I bet he has a smile on his face all day long.

It was ten after five when I hopped up, hearing my door open. "It's you...the secret keeper. No secret keepers allowed." It was Bella. "I'mma get a sign that says that."

"Yeah...it's me, and...there are no secrets to tell." Bella tiptoed inside, closing and locking my door. "Sleeping before. It was awesome. I was so comfortable."

"No…" I pulled my blanket around myself.

"And can you believe them? I put my radio on, but—" Bella stared at me "—Jasper and I share a wall, so I win. It sucks worse for me. Move over."

"What? There's a couch downstairs." I thought better. "You stay here, and I'll—"

"Don't be stupid. I got the best sleep ever with you," she sighed and got cozy on the edge of my bed anyway.

Tensions were suddenly high again, and we didn't say anything for a while. I stared up to the ceiling, my arms folded behind my head, and Bella kept flopping around. "Can you stop?" I asked. "It's annoying."

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

I rolled my eyes. "Stop with the sorries."

_All night . . ._

Where was her attitude? The girl who'd stomped to the club to beat up Lauren? Who almost kicked Alice's ass for talking to me? Who—

Needless to say, I was getting tired of all the bullshit—her being so fearful when someone, _excuse me_, when a male raises his voice. The way she cowered from Jake and then me when I'd lost my temper earlier.

Maybe Jasper and I don't really count, but Bella was wary, or just extra aware, when it came to being around other men. So, it solved that mystery for me—whether or not Bella's loose, carries herself a certain way.

She doesn't.

_I, Edward Masino Jr., only had that effect on her._

As I slowly placed the puzzle pieces together, I started noticing and remembering more and more.

Her being scared to call CJ, only speaking when spoken to when it came to my godfather and every male who'd been at their crib earlier. Sure, Colleonis are who they are, but a female such as Bella wouldn't have any cause to fear them, none that I could see. Especially since—as I'd heard—Bella is always at their house, chillin' with Alice, Rosalie, Esme, and even Marie.

_Maybe she's confided in one of them?_

No, she hasn't. It'd be the smartest fucking thing she could have ever done—before I arrived—too.

I firmly believed that if Jakey-Poo-Pussy ever disrespected Bella, did her any harm, that motherfucker would be "sleeping with the fishes".

_Or maybe I was wrong about it all?_

No, I truly didn't think I was.

All of that needed to stop. She also needed to tell me the truth. Jake's fate might at as well me written in fucking stone, but she was going to tell me—tell me so I could be here for her, do my best to get her the help she needed.

Bella didn't need me lusting for her, nor did she need a boyfriend.

She truly needed someone she could trust.

"Don't be sorry for things...don't say you're sorry when my grumpy ass doesn't deserve an apology," I said. "Never be sorry when there's nothing to be sorry for. I'd never—Christ—I'd never—"

"You really, um, you really want me to go?"

My eyes widened. "No, baby. You're fine."

"'K." She flipped onto her back, arching it and pushing her chest out.

Trust me; I was watching. I knew what she was doing. We were in a twin-sized fucking-bed. There wasn't much she could do without me noticing. I barely fit in this thing as is, my feet fucking dangling, but it's not like she takes up that much room.

The heat radiating off of her—her arm resting against my own—gave me goose bumps, instead of making me sweat.

Then she hummed, tilting her head and exposing her neck . . . trying to get my attention, or trying to get me to pounce.

_Another agonizing pregnant pause ensued._

She got the hint, huffed and turned over to her side. Though, all her moving was honestly grating on my nerves. "Can you just hold me...?"

I hid my smile and did as she asked. "You're not making this a habit." Gathering her into my arms, I inhaled a nose-full of her shampoo, hugging her close.

"I feel safe with you."

"Why is that?" I asked, forever wanting her to elaborate.

"I just do."

"You should feel safer in your bedroom." _Away from my cock. _"You should feel safe at home, regardless, I mean."

"You keep the monsters away." Bella hummed, sounding years too young, which took care of my dick . . .

It was crazy cute, though.

_Dammit!_

I cringed, hating myself.

"You okay?" she asked.

I nodded.

Bella doesn't need this, me being a pervert . . .

Sadly, I think she needs a good therapist. Not saying she's crazy, but maybe her thought process about men is fucked? I didn't need a degree to figure out...She thinks...I couldn't figure out my own thoughts.

_Ha!_

I got it.

Maybe sex is a way of validation?

Again, maybe I was the one obsessed with this? My mind coming to all conclusions?

I vowed to myself that I'd just be here, for Bella, whatever she needs.

And I just pray she confides in me.

However, I really didn't want it all to be true—that she was abused, or hurt in some horrible way.

Their sex life—the way she'd described it . . .

I groaned.

"I'm sorry. If—" she started scooting away, and I felt her breath on my arm, cascading down to my hand and making those goose bumps come back and shit.

I licked my lips, staring up to the ceiling. "No." I tightened my hold. "You're fine. You did nothing wrong."

"I forgot to set the coffee pot," she whispered.

"Go do it." I smiled.

"So you can lock your door as soon as I leave?" She turned over to face me, and I felt her eyes on me.

"You caught me, but I've gotten used to your coffee." It was true. Both accusations. My mind was fucked, kept going on and on because she was near, and I didn't know if my cock would behave. And I also love Bella's coffee.

"Um, Edward...?"

"Yeah?" I scratched at my shoulder; her hair tickling me.

"I'll stop doing what I've been doing. But while you're taking time to think—think about us and what you want, which I really hope you will . . . promise me you won't, um . . . drink another woman's coffee?" She stiffened, holding my forearm tighter to her chest.

I thought she was adorable. "I won't disrespect you. While I'm living in your house? I won't...drink another woman's coffee." I thought it was sweet, the way she'd put it.

It was going to be a long three months; however, it'll be well worth it. I wouldn't do that to her, parade some other bitch around. I didn't think I could. Only because it'd kill me at this point if she did the same—started dating someone else I'd wanna clip . . . just because.

The fact that I'd do something so drastic to her would-be lover spoke volumes to me. I'd never felt this level of jealousy before—the possessiveness.

In my head, she was mine.

_Mine._

_Mine._

_Motherfucking MINE!_

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Maybe in three months _we'd_ be together? Maybe in three _weeks_ we'd be together?

_Three days is too soon._

Too soon to ease Jasper into the idea of us—of Bella and me together as a couple . . . of fools.

Christ. I was scared, so sure I'd fuck it up in some way.

In the grand scheme of things, three months was nothing. I'd gone whole deployments without getting laid.

Yet . . . it's funny how that really wasn't important now.

What's important is the whole Jasper issue.

More important than that...?

Getting Bella to open up, getting her to trust me, having Bella all healed up from...whatever.

I still wasn't 100% sure what she'd gone through.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." I kissed her hair, while she nestled into me. "And you won't make any coffee for other dudes?"

"Um…well, Jasper drinks it."

"You know what I mean." I tickled her side.

She shook her head no. "I don't even want to. You have to know that I don't want to—not for anyone else. What we did was special. Thinking about it makes me dizzy...your hands, your mouth, you. Everything that's you." Maybe Bella should go in to writing erotic greeting cards?

"I don't want anyone but you." She leaned toward me, and I knew she was going to kiss me.

I turned away. "I'm, uh, I haven't talked to Jasper about it. But…I'm going away for a few days."

"Where?" Her head popped up.

"Just down to Florida…nothing special. There's something's I gotta do."

"Like what?" she asked.

"I can't tell you."

She nodded. "It has to do with your godfather…Are you going on a run?"

"Yeah. I have to start somewhere. I'm essentially a nobody." I rolled onto my back, thinking of the irony. I can't tell her, yet Bella probably knows more about what I'm gonna do than I do.

"You're definitely somebody. You're absolutely wonderful, and you are somebody. You're _my_ somebody." She got back into her nook. "I'm sorry for yelling at you before—saying what I did."

"You're going through some shit . . . and you're my somebody. Don't ever doubt that. Just gimme time." I hugged her tight. But at this point, I think was really giving _her_ time.

"You mean that?"

"I do . . . hey, my piece is still in your room."

"It'll be there tomorrow—in the morning. I'm not leaving." She totally hijacked my entire blanket.

I smiled and yanked some away for me. "Right."

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	34. Chapter 34

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

**_T_**he next morning, Bella must have snuck out of my room unseen.

Jasper had already left for school by the time I woke up—alone in my bed—and since he didn't barge in screaming before my alarm clock went off, I guessed he had no idea Bella slept in here.

Not getting to see him before he took off, I had no idea what might be going through his mind.

His little boo-boo was still here.

Alice hung around, made coffee and pancakes, which was pretty cool.

Then she made me swear that if CJ asked, I'd confirm she slept in Bella's room.

Highly doubting CJ would inquire about such a thing, I just agreed.

But when Alice called her mother, Esme wanted to talk to me—the supposed adult in the house.

I felt badly for lying to her, but Alice cringed, prayed, and begged me.

I told her she owed me one.

Bella graciously told her friend the truth—that her coffee sucked before she proceeded to make another pot.

Throughout the morning, though, I'd expressed my concern about Bella being home alone today. She thought I just wanted her to come and work, but that wasn't the only reason.

After Bella said she'd likely go swimming, go back to Alice's, I let the subject drop.

Then, before I left, Bella approached me with a travel mug filled with the coffee she'd made.

"Thanks," I said.

"Don't mention it." She was still in her PJs, looking exceptionally cute in Winnie the Pooh sleep pants and a tank top. "What time will you be home?"

Knowing I had to call Riley some time today, I couldn't give her an answer. "I meant what I said. You wanna make a few bucks, pocket money, swing by Sal's. It won't be so bad."

Okay, maybe I wasn't ready to let the subject die.

I was also getting tired of being subtle, too.

"Oh." She nodded. "I just...wanted to know because of dinner and stuff, what time to have it ready." Bella glanced at her toes.

"How 'bout we eat whatever's at Sal's for dinner? By that time Jasper will be there." Today would be the first time she's left alone since the Jake debacle nights prior. I know Jasper was concerned as well. If she doesn't come through, he probably won't come into work. "Or..._we'll_ work the dayshift and go someplace else...? Please?"

"How can I say 'no' if you say 'please'?" She had stars in her eyes, fucking beaming.

Baby girl was smiling so wide, it made me feel all warm inside. Since I'm back, I've yet to see her face that jovial. Bella was absolutely breathtaking this morning—prettiest fucking face I've ever seen.

And I mean, all morning. The girl hasn't stopped smiling.

It makes me crack a wide one every time she looks at me. "You'll come to work with me?"

Unfortunately, the pizzeria is due to open shortly, although I was sure old man Ruffalo was in the back cooking, making pizzas already. He enters through the back, but I have the keys to the gate. I didn't have the time to wait for Bella to get dressed.

"Off to work, Edward?" Alice interrupted, trailing down the stairs—fully clothed today.

I nodded and watched her walk into the kitchen; Bella and I didn't say a word. As soon as Alice was out of sight, I stared down at Bella again. "Hmm? I know it's not as exciting or glamorous as chillin' by the pool...at Alice's house."

For this neighborhood, my godfather owns what could be considered a mansion, in-ground pool, an obviously large backyard. It's actually set up like a compound, too—with a circle driveway in front along with tall entry gates. I guess it's not as huge as actual mansions, but I really hoped one day I'd own something like that, or turn my father's house into something similar.

It's right down the block from here. I'll still be a stone's throw from where Bella and Jasper live, this house.

She giggled. "I already said I would, and . . . there's no other place I'd rather be."

"Good." My hands ached to touch her. "Alice is still here—" I brought my voice down to a whisper "—and I'm sure you want the scoop?" I chuckled. "Don't forget to tell me, too."

"Definitely," Bella laughed, gently pulling on my sleeve.

I looked down to my phone to check the time.

"Don't expect me too soon, though. I have to pick her brain, shower, and get ready." Her thumb jerked to the stairs.

I nodded. "Be there by one . . . one-ish? That should be cool."

She wouldn't be alone for too long. She'd have plenty of time to do all she'd need to at a snail's pace. I bet Bella thinks the day will be long, so she'll take her time. That's not the case, though—boredom, sweating to death—whatever bad shit she associates with working at the pizzeria.

I know we'll have fun today.

"Okay. Cool. That gives me time." Her gaze fell to the floor.

By now, we were just standing in the foyer, the both of us expectant? I wasn't sure, but I couldn't keep my eyes off of her—that smile.

Bella had quite an appetite, too, this morning—chowing down on those pancakes—when she usually eats like a bird.

I think . . . I'm not sure, but it almost feels as though the clouds have parted for her; Bella sees sunshine.

While stuffing my phone back into my pocket, my gaze lingered on her mouth. Impulsively, my thumb skimmed across her lower lip. She had some toothpaste there. "Sorry." The last thing I wanted to do was overstep.

Bella licked her lips, embarrassed. "I probably look horrible, a mess." She frowned, and that shit just wouldn't do.

"You're gorgeous," I whispered, lifting her chin. "Always . . . remember that. Always."

It was a mistake.

_I shouldn't have done that._

However, I didn't want that smile to disappear, even for a second.

And what the fuck was I fighting my instincts for? Especially one as chaste as that.

My head was totally fucked this morning, too.

But Bella's smile kept me sane, grounded.

She sighed, staring up at me.

"I gotta go . . . Be good." I turned for the door again, nonchalantly licking the minty paste from my thumb.

"Wait a minute!" She rushed out.

"What?" I asked.

Bella looked around herself before she hopped up to plant a wet smooch on my lips.

Though unexpected, it made me chuckle because that was too sweet for words—innocent—and it was exactly what I needed. Maybe that's why I've been so reluctant to leave.

"Bella…" I had a tone, although teasing, seeing as she was playing with fire. Christ. I wanted those lips again, I wanted to give her a real kiss, but...that'd go against every conclusion I came to realize. "Watch it."

Something had shifted last night. Maybe she carries herself immaturely at times, but Bella had grown up. She's a woman who knows what she wants, and it seems like she wants me.

But I was still as conflicted as ever inside.

Bella and Jasper—they're two people I'd love to know _all_ my life.

And sleeping with Bella . . .

It was fantastic, no bones about it. And I wanted her again.

I just didn't know if we had a future, or how to go about continuing...to get to that future, or, or, or, or Jasper . . .

If Bella and I were going to continue to sleep together, I didn't wanna hide it. I also had to make up my mind.

Be a man and go for it, _if_ I was balls certain.

Or, gather the strength to step away from Bella totally—only be her friend. I'd explain it all to her again, draw another line that seems to be invisible to Bella anyway, and hope she understands?

I didn't know if I wanted to or _could_ do the latter...completely step away, only be her friend.

I do know that most couples . . . they don't stay together forever.

And if I pursued Bella, I could be throwing away lifelong friendships because . . .

_I needed time to think!_

Because she was worth it.

She was worth be at least giving it a try.

She was worth a potential conflict with Jasper. He'd probably get over it sooner or later.

And she was worth saving . . .

No matter our status—just friends or friends-who-fuck—I cared for Bella, and I'd stay, I'd be around, I'd be there for her, I'd be whatever she needed until she tells me to leave her alone.

"You know you wanted it," she whispered.

I laughed, shaking my head. "Lock this door as soon as I leave."

"Of course." She waved this dainty little wave, and then she blew me a kiss.

Rolling my eyes, I left the house, running down the steps and up the block.

* * *

**Thank you for reading!**

**Next . . . We'll be hearing from Bella.**

**Remember that disclaimer/warning, me trying to prep you guys for the heavy chaps coming up?**

**It's soon.**


	35. Chapter 35

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**NOTE: So conflicted, Bella's thoughts are supposed to seem jumbled.**

**Warning: Sensitive subjects, which may be a trigger to some folks.**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Thirty-Five**

**Bella POV**

_**A**_s soon as I locked the door, I moved over to the window to watch Edward walk up the block.

_He has such a cute ass._

I'd felt his bare-ass nights ago.

_It's totally fucking solid._

I smiled like a lunatic, hugging the drape to my chest.

Last night was amazing. We didn't do anything, but it was nice to have someone to talk to—to open up to and shit. We cuddled, snuggled, and he was sporting a stiffy in the morning.

Before I left his bedroom, I might have grazed his dick with my hand—my mouth watering—and he never woke up.

Nevertheless, I had morning breath, and I needed to leave his room before Jasper noticed I was in there.

When Edward was no longer in sight—he'd turned the corner—I heaved a heavy sigh, my face falling.

I'm torn between what could make me happy and what would ultimately kill me.

I feel as though I'm an inch away from both, teetering in the middle.

I know Edward is confused.

He seems to be worrying about Jasper, and that's all.

While I don't know what he truly feels for me, I had my own demons to sort through.

I was Jake's before Edward came back.

But I hoped that was truly over now.

Edward's presence gave me something to fight for.

Because I want him . . . I want to be his girl. I actually _want_ a future now—a future filled with hand-holding, kissing, loving, and making love to Edward.

I couldn't remember ever wanting any of that with Jake.

_Never._

Jake has refused to part with me many times—every time I've tried to break up with him—so I succumbed to staying with him, realizing that all I'd ever know was _his_ love, his _version_ of love, _my_ misery.

I was resigned, trapped, thinking Jake was _it_ for me.

But Edward...

I couldn't be with Jake anymore—no matter the cost, no matter the injury—I was done with Jake.

I _was_ happy when I first got together with Jake. Sadly, that only lasted for a few weeks. We seemed to have the same sense of humor. We joked and hung out a lot, always laughing. But the closer we got—the longer we were together—the more he changed.

Maybe I wasn't as mature as my friends, where boys were concerned. Gram never told me anything. Jasper would never have that talk with me. I knew of the mechanics, how it all worked from Health class when they focused on Sex-Ed.

But...I knew nothing about the rest of it? Feelings and whatnot, I guess.

All I could go off of was what my friends were saying. They all told me to do it, without a doubt, to have sex with my boyfriend.

_Because it's so great . . . _

Then there was Jake, who was obviously all for it, pressuring me and shit. Jake was a man. He wasn't a high school boy.

But no matter what anyone said, I was still undecided.

After remembering what my Gram always said: _If you don't know what to do, don't do anything at all. _I decided that I wasn't ready.

I was scared and I didn't want to, not yet.

_I wasn't ready._

The same day I came to that conclusion, Jake told me that we _had to_ . . . had to do it.

I'd said no, hoping he'd understand, but then we'd argued.

Jake stopped asking, the slap to my cheek stopped the argument, and he didn't _ask_ me again.

Jake just . . .

I still said no. I didn't want it.

But . . .

Jake said he was my boyfriend. He said couples have sex and I believed him. He'd done nothing wrong.

I'd always imagined what it'd be like . . .

Not like that, though.

Not . . . like that.

I remembered being in a mass amount of pain afterward, feeling gross, and begging Jasper to let me stay home from school the next morning.

I'd lied, said I kept crying because I missed Gram. She'd just passed away not even a month prior, so my brother believed me. Well, it wasn't_ all_ a lie. I missed my grandmother something fierce.

Jasper let me stay home where I hid in my room until the following day.

That was the first time, _my_ first time. I'd expected pain with losing my virginity, but...not like that.

No matter what Jake said, everything inside me told me that what we did was wrong.

It wasn't supposed to be like that.

I needed to tell someone, but I didn't.

When I'd finally left my bedroom, I'd put on tons of makeup, had gone to school, and I'd giggled as I'd lied about it.

I felt like I was dying inside, telling Alice about the candles, the champagne . . . the shit I saw in a fucking movie once.

There was no way I could tell her the truth. There was no way I could tell anyone.

I wanted to tell Jasper so badly, but when he saw the bruise on my cheek, he went ballistic. I assured him it was just me being clumsy, and he bought it. According to my brother, I'm a total klutz. But I'm really not.

Last night, when Edward figured out the truth, I panicked—had to make something up so he'd drop it. There's no way I could tell him. Edward—he'll probably think I'm dirty, disgusting. He'd look at me differently, and that can't happen—not Edward.

Even last year, if I'd made a fuss, Jasper would go after Jake . . . Jake would kill him.

And I'd be alone.

All because I was a whiny bitch. That's what Jake had called me, said I was making a big deal out of nothing—I'd fucked my boyfriend.

So, what?

But I'd told Jake...I never wanted to have sex again, if that's what it was like.

I told him we couldn't be together anymore.

He said no. I was being ridiculous. Jake said most women don't enjoy their first time. It'd get better. I'd learn to love it.

I didn't.

Weeks passed, I healed, and so did the scar on my wrist.

_I couldn't even do that right._

I didn't bleed out, but Jasper found me.

I needed stitches, however, no major vessels were broken.

Jasper told me to never scare him like that again. He cried, and seeing my big brother weep . . .

Around that time, I'd accused Jake of . . . he told me I was full of shit. We're together. I'm his girl. He's allowed to have me when he wants me

Then months passed.

And it got to be normal, I guess. Well, being with Jake—being his girlfriend and being with him intimately became a normal occurrence.

_I_ was abnormal, never finding joy in the deed, always feeling it was wrong, feeling disgusting.

But he'd never let me go.

I was his.

With Jake, I never felt anything. He'd kiss me, spread my legs apart, and then…he'd do what he had to do. It was never enjoyable, but I thought there was something wrong with _me_—that I never had orgasm—that I didn't gush or become giddy like Alice or Rosalie after having sex.

I used to pretend…

Although I never liked it—having sex with Jake—it wasn't worth the argument that'd ensue if I'd denied him.

And it was always best to grin and bear it.

I mean, he'd be done in five minutes anyway.

And bruises last for days . . .

It was all normal . . .

He was my boyfriend. I wasn't allowed to say no, and as his girlfriend, I had to make sure he was satisfied.

Soon, it just became normal to me . . . acceptable to me, I got used to it, used to him, and I no longer felt that it was wrong.

None of it was wrong.

It was sex.

_Christ._

Being with Edward was nothing like any of that—it was nothing like anything I'd ever known.

I couldn't—I didn't even want to compare Jake and Edward.

Because…if Edward and I had sex the other night, then I don't know what it was that I'd been doing with Jake.

Edward asked for permission, at least, not that _he_ needed any.

When Edward touches me, I swear I see stars; magical things happen. He makes me feel bold and sexy, and I can't believe I did what I did.

I'd successfully seduced him.

He never asked or expected me to touch myself or be perverted, but I want to be his—his sex toy, his, his, his.

I wanna do what we did on the stairs every day, a million times, as many times as he'll let me make love to him.

Being with Edward made me realize that it wasn't me, there's nothing wrong with me sexually. It was Jake.

Or, maybe I was always meant to be with Edward.

I want to belong to Edward and be his woman.

That's all I can say is certain.

Everything else?

I have no idea what to do about Jake.

I know it's not over, and I'm fearful.

Edward totally kicked Jake's ass that night, and it took everything within me to stop Edward—stop Edward from killing him.

If things were simpler, I would have landed the last, deathly blow with a brick or something.

I'd only shown concern to save my own ass—so Jake would think I cared, so Jake wouldn't hurt me because I didn't care.

Then I kicked him.

Jake has a lot of friends. Emmett has friends, and Jake is his best friend . . . and Jake will come for Edward to teach him a lesson.

Next time, there won't be a fair fight.

And I have no idea where Emmett's loyalties lay.

On top of that, yeah, I'm confused.

The feelings I have for Edward have dominated my mind.

Since he's been back in town, Edward fogs my brain.

I went from being okay with Jake to hating his very existence. Jake did all that to me. It was never loving or endearing. We never made love. What Jake and I shared was something else entirely.

Something disgusting and horrible.

Something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

Something that happened to me over and over and over and over again . . .

The sex.

The bruises.

The scars.

I know all of that was wrong now.

_Now._

When I didn't know it was wrong before.

And I know Jake screwed Lauren—before, while, and I bet he's hooking up with her again now. She'll lick his wounds, and then he'll come seek forgiveness from me.

_It's not over._

The last time I tried to break up with him, he'd said no. He kept coming back around. He's intense and can be scary . . .

It's easier to stay with him, be as pleasing as I can, so there won't be any problems for Jasper.

My brother would try to kill Jake if he knew the half of it . . .

The end result would be Jasper getting hurt, though.

That couldn't happen. Not my brother, no way.

Jake's possessiveness used to make me think he cared, mistaking it for love and/or passion.

Not anymore.

Not while I'm…consumed by Edward.

Not when I got a small taste of real passion, real kindness.

I don't know what's going on in my head or what's wrong with me—why my thinking is all over the place. It makes me cringe all the time.

That's why I was crying last night, suddenly aware of it all. I can't pick a thought, a subject, or an emotion and stick with it—the truth of it all crashing down on me—being with Edward and then realizing that everything Jake did to me was wrong.

So, so wrong.

It wasn't normal.

Edward turned my world upside down, and I wouldn't rest until he was mine.

That wonderful man.

_That's what I live for these days._

Before...I thought the only way I'd ever get rid of Jake was by death.

My death.

Life was pointless.

"What'cha doin'?" Alice peeked from behind me.

I let go of the drape. "Looking out for Jake. I don't know."

She winced but recovered quickly. "It sucks . . . but you need to dish. What was Edward doing in your room last night?"

"Excuse me?" I asked.

Alice was one to talk, just after spending the night with Jasper—waltzing into my room wearing a sheet.

Then Jasper's bed making all that noise . . .

"What's the deal with you and Jasper?" I laughed. "Oh, I mean, you and Jazzy-the-Tiger!"

Truth be told, I have no problems with them hooking up. I actually think they'll be good for each other, to an extent, if they become a couple. Alice is always so happy, and Jasper . . . he's always so serious. My friend has had a crush on my brother for ages. Them being together, it gave me hope. Maybe we'll both snag the guys we want—she gets Jasper and I can have Edward.

That's why Edward's reluctance—his concerns involving my brother—seem silly to me.

Why should Jasper care? Especially if Edward and I are happy, his best friend and his sister, the two people he cares for the most . . .

_What's wrong with it?_

"You heard me?" she giggled.

"Uh...yeah." I bit my lips together to stop from chuckling. I think Edward and I heard it all last night. Well, when we were awake.

Alice was beaming with this far off look on her face. I smiled just as wide as my best friend, finally knowing exactly what that feels like. "I totally had to make the first move…but that's_ all_ I had to do," she sighed, "he's an animal."

I gagged on my finger to tease her.

She slapped my arm. "What happened with Edward?"

"Nothing." I kept my word, wasn't going to spill no matter what. "I was upset…since I'm so...I suck and I'm emo."

Alice has no idea; she knows nothing about what being with Jake was like, and I wouldn't burden her with it now.

I went to grab my coffee from the kitchen counter. "I mean…everything is just…"

"I'd hate to be you—so conflicted. But if you can work things out with Jake, maybe forgive him? I say go for it. You know? You don't know what's going on in Edward's head."

"I think I do," I admitted. "Besides, there's no going back to Jake, even _if_ I wanted him, which I don't. After what happened the other night, Jasper will never allow it. Things might get ugly . . . but it's Jake's fault. He cheated, so I hope he just leaves me alone...leaves Jasper, Edward, and me alone." I shivered despite the heat.

"But—" She shook her head, confused. "You can count on there being problems if you're all over Edward right away. People talk." She also doesn't know about Edward telling Jake to step off. "I'm telling you. Leave Edward alone. Jake cheating is a better excuse for breaking up with him." She frowned. "He's such an asshole, though, for being with Lauren. And I don't even wanna think about what'll happen if Jake suspects . . . and there's really nothing going on between you and Edward anyway," she ranted.

"You'll start trouble for nothing. Your brother and Edward could get hurt for no reason. What? Because you've deluded yourself into thinking you're with Edward? Come on now." Alice sucked her teeth, and then she grasped my shoulders. "Listen to me, Bella—"

I shrugged her off and stepped away. "Edward's just as—just as confused as I am," I said. "But for different reasons. I just have to give him time and make him see—that he cares about me, that he wants me—that he wants to be with me just as badly." I stared off into space, only knowing one thing.

"Edward wants me, too. I know it." I nodded. "I just have to make him see." I think I repeated myself there. "He wants to be with me more than he's letting on. I just hope Jake stays away. Otherwise—"

She grabbed my biceps, shaking me. "Are you listening to yourself? The shit you've been saying lately…you sound like some psycho. Trust me. I'm over the moon because of last night, being with Jasper. But, Bella, I was actually with him—"

I shook my head. "You don't get it."

She groaned, exasperated with me.

"You really don't understand." I couldn't tell her. I wanted to, and I willed myself not to cry.

"Fine." She blew out a breath. "How far do these...feelings you have go? Do you think you love him—Edward, I mean?"

"No." I snorted, might have lied. "It's too soon for that."

But inside, I knew my feelings for him were strong—heady, constantly making me dizzy.

"I do care for him very much. I have that love from knowing him all my life. Edward going away, him being away, didn't change how I've always felt. Edward being back, though...? It's different—the way I feel about him now."

Falling for Edward would be too easy, and it could happen at any minute . . . any second, I think.

Although it's not love just yet, I knew my feelings for Edward were stronger than anything I'd felt for Jake during our best days.

"Bella..." She kept her tone low, was about to scold me. "I think—"

Before Alice could say anything more, I ran upstairs to get take a shower and get dressed.

I wanted to hang out at the pizzeria today.

Alice followed and I ignored her words. Maybe her brother gives good advice, but Alice doesn't know her ass from her elbow.

Besides, she was telling me to lay off Edward, and I didn't wanna hear it.

She obviously didn't understand.

I never take her advice. She means well, and her intentions are always heartfelt, but she's just as screwed in the love department as I am. She can never hold onto a man. She either scares them away with her…clingy-ness, or her daddy scares them.

Maybe Alice has it right, though.

She'd never...She'd never let a guy treat her the way Jake treated me.

And just over a week ago, I saw nothing wrong with the way things were.

God. I wished I was smarter, craftier...that I'd known better.

_Realization is a motherfucker._

No, I knew before I was with Edward, that it was all wrong . . . but now I realize what's been making me so depressed.

While I thought it was normal, silent parts of me knew it wasn't, and I'd be contemplating suicide all the time, looking for a way out.

In other ways, I'm glad I didn't know for all that time.

I'm glad I never opened my mouth.

Not knowing is one thing.

But being aware of those terrible things, knowing they're wrong, and then telling someone.

When there'd be nothing anyone could do to help me . . .

When telling your brother could get him killed.

When even the police look the other way around here.

No one cares.

I mean, I might still be trapped. I have no idea what will happen tomorrow, or the day after, but I was going to enjoy the moment.

I'll make pizza with Edward.

I'll smile.

And maybe I won't feel worthless.

And maybe my life won't be pointless.

Today . . .

For the first time in a long time, I was hopeful.

While I was in the shower, Alice poked her head in to say that her ride was here. She'd call me later.

As much as I wanted more answers—specifically how she got my brother into bed—I let her go.

My best friend over shares, and I didn't want to hear about my brother's lovemaking style . . . fucking Jazzy-the-Tiger.

The thought alone made me cringe as I reached for a towel.

"Here…" Jake held one out to me.

I let out a terrified scream.

He chuckled. "It's just me."

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**All right . . . Remember that warning? That's coming up next.**

**Again, Bella's thoughts were supposed to seem jumbled. I hope you guys were able to follow.**

**And yeah, after abuse like she's gone through, it becomes normal, a way of life. Combine that with not really knowing any better . . . and here you go ^ we have Bella.**


	36. Chapter 36

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No Copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**WARNING!**

**WARNING!**

**WARNING: **This chapter contains scenes that are violent and could be triggers for some of you. It is a key chapter in the story, so it's not one I can just suggest you skip over. But do know that, as this story is pre-written, nothing in this chapter was added lightly or without necessity.

Bella's life is not the stuff of fairy tales. And this chapter shows the dark side of her life IN LIVING COLOR.

Please tread carefully. And if you do need to flounce, please just click the 'X' in the corner rather than a dramatic exit.

Thank you for reading.

**OK. When I posted this chapter the FIRST time...Immediately after that was when FFn pulled Tribute from the site. It's this chapter that's edited and that's it. Some scenes are missing in this chapter. To read the FULL chapter, please visit: www dot TributeSLC dot wordpress dot com**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

**BELLA POV**

**_I_** sniffled, calming some and taking the towel to hold it up to my wet body. "What—um—how'd you get in?" I asked, every bit of hope I had flying out the window.

He shrugged, taking a seat on the toilet. "When Alice was leaving . . ."

My friend would never let him in. She would never let him in without asking first.

"Alice knows to lock the door," I said.

He waved a hand.

"You broke in?" I wrapped the towel around myself. "The back door?" That lock is easy to pick. Jasper and I do it all the time when we misplace our keys.

"Relax, baby." He held my hand, helping me out of the tub.

Jake's face was a mess, both of his eyes blackened, swollen nose, and he had a cut lip. And I'd bet there were bruises all over his body.

_Good._

"It's just me," he said.

Proceeding with caution, I kept my distance within the small space of the bathroom. "I think you should go."

"No..." He pulled me to sit on his lap. "We argued and now it's time to make up. I don't know who told you that garbage—that shit about me and Lauren, but it's not true."

Nervous, I tried and failed at leaving his embrace.

"Bells…" He was exasperated as he let me go. "What's going on?"

"You weren't supposed to come back. You heard Edward—"

"It's like that…?" He narrowed his eyes at me. "For real? Because _he_ says?"

I nodded. "It-it's not because of Edward at all. I think—I think we're done. I think you did screw Lauren. You played me. Everybody knows." I rushed all of that out, feeling winded at the end.

"Bullshit," he laughed. "It's not true! I love you, baby." He grabbed my hand again.

I shook my head. "Just go, okay? I just—I have a lot on my mind, and I need time." I thought that bullshit excuse would _buy_ me time and get him to leave.

But it was no use.

And it only mattered because Edward gave me a reason to smile.

Otherwise, weeks ago, I wouldn't have cared what happened to me, or what Jake would do.

Edward made me care about what happened to me.

He made me care about myself.

With his arrival came hope and a slew of other feelings I'd never had before.

I felt alive because of him.

I used to be _scared_ of Jake, but then I just got _used_ to him.

Then . . . I stopped caring about certain outcomes.

I gave up . . . hope, love, thinking about the future . . . I just gave up.

Somehow, there's a light at the end of the tunnel now.

I had to fight and stand my ground, although that might make him snap.

I was truly between a rock and a hard place: fight and possibly die, or do nothing and continue to be dead inside anyway.

"I—"

"We were fine until that motherfucker showed up." He pursed his lips.

"It's not Edward's fault—far from it. I don't know what that was about that night." I leaned away, trying to pry my hand out of his grip. "Jake, please—"

"Do you still love me?"

I opened my mouth but my words were stuck. "I—I don't know," I whispered, keeping my head low, preparing myself for the blow.

If I said yes, it'd encourage him to stay.

If I said no . . .

"I need time . . . you-you cheated. You slept with Lauren—"

"I didn't!" he shouted, reaching out to punch the wall next to me.

It made me jump, and I almost tumbled back into the tub. "I'm sorry." I was able to right myself.

He was losing his temper.

"Jake…I'm sorry." I put my palms up. "Let me get dressed and then we'll talk. Okay?"

He opened the door, gesturing for me to leave the bathroom.

Fearful, I tiptoed around him going toward my bedroom until I felt him following. "I'll be out in a minute. There's coffee—"

"I don't want coffee," he said. "Just tell me why things are cool one minute and the next they're fucked? Huh? Tell me why."

"Jake…" I was scared out of my mind, grasping at straws. "You're suffocating me—"

"First I'm fucking around and now I'm suffocating?"

I nodded, staring at my toes.

He grasped my biceps, gritting his teeth, and pushing me back against the wall. "You know what? You're sick." He nodded. "Yeah, you're sick."

"What…?" I pushed against him.

"There's something wrong with you. You're fucked in the head. And I wouldn't have fucked Lauren if I was getting what I should get from you. Ever think of that? You don't touch me. You never want sex. When we do—" he laughed, pressing himself against me "—you're a dead lay."

Jake twirled my wet hair around his fingers. "I fucked Lauren." He made me look at him. "I fucked her good, too. And if you—" his hand ran up my thigh, and I cringed into the wall "—if you did what you were supposed to? I wouldn't have."

"Please...let me go," I whispered.

Jake leaned away. "Let you go? I can't even touch you now?"

I tried to move, but he still had my body pinned.

"You in there?" He knocked on my head. "You're either the dumbest bitch or retarded. Which one is it...? Huh? Answer me!" Jake pulled me just to push me back into the wall.

I had no idea what to say. While what he said is true—that I never initiate sex—I couldn't tell him the truth. That he's repulsive. That if I had a choice, we would have broken up a long time ago. That he'd be dead if it was up to me.

I wish I had a choice in a lot of things...sex being one of them.

Maybe I should thank Lauren. She took some of the burden off me. Otherwise, he would have wanted more from me.

My head whipped to the side when he slapped me.

"Wake up!" he yelled.

I cupped my cheek, refusing to cry, but feeling the tears well up anyway. Many thoughts ran through my mind, but one screamed out the loudest. I wondered if I had enough foundation—makeup—to cover this round, needing to hide it from Jasper . . . and my Eddie Spaghetti.

_Edward. Edward. Edward_.

Jake's eyes were wide as he reached for me. "I'm sorry." He hugged me close to him, like he always does after he hits me, rubbing down my back. "I love you so much—but you don't listen, and—I-I'm sorry. You never listen. You always have to test me. You need to stop this. Why do you _make_ me do this?" He held my jaw, making me meet his gaze, but I had no idea how I'd provoked him.

_I never know._

After looking into his eyes, I fought to get him off me, feeling angrier than I ever had before—fight filling me when it had been lost. "Get out!" I cried, screaming at the top of my lungs. "I hate you!"

"Hate me?" he barked.

I fell down onto the floor when he backhanded me.

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**SCENES MISSING! Visit the links up top to read the chapter in full**

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"Did you enjoy it?" he asked, blowing his smoke up and away from me. "Always so quick to say no, but then you love it."

I sniffled, backing into the wall. "Yeah," I lied.

"Good." He reached out to palm my cheek, and his cigarette was too close to my face, my hair. "I needed that. It'd been a minute." He shook his head. "I'm sorry, you know? About before? I just couldn't think straight, thinking about you with Edward. You know how much I love you." He turned his whole body to face me, and I wanted to vomit. "You know I don't mean it . . . Come here."

With my entire body shaking, I managed to crawl over to him, but he pulled me to sit on his lap. Thankfully, he didn't see me cringe.

"You know I never wanna hurt you, right?"

I nodded, my gaze unseeing; my eyes blurred by my tears.

"You just have to listen when I talk."

"Why'd you do that?" I sobbed, choking on my cries. "I didn't want to—and—"

He didn't have to hit me—mark me.

Well, he never _had to_.

I don't know.

_I just didn't know!_

"Why...?"

"Shhh." He kissed my cheek. "I love you." He kissed me once more, wrapping his arms around me. "Make sure you wear makeup. I don't want problems with Jasper . . . have to beat his ass and then you'll be mad at me." Jake trailed his finger along my cheek.

I didn't say anything, but I knew I had to hide it. I'd never want Jasper to get hurt trying to defend me, or for there to be future problems because of me.

_I'm not worth it._

"Don't make me have to kill your brother."

"I won't tell. I'll cover it," I rushed to say the usual lines. "I know you didn't mean it." I read that from the script of my life.

"You don't love me no more?" He chuckled, hugging me tighter.

"You know I do." I bit my quivering lip. It hurt something awful, was still bleeding, as I tasted the blood. "But you should go—Edward said he'd be back at one," I lied, hoping he'd leave.

"Why's he coming back?" He snorted. "Bringing you lunch?" Jake shook his head, laughing. "Yeah, you gotta leave this dump—leave it to those two. This place is old and..." He looked around, grimacing at the house Gram took so much pride in—the house I'd been trying my hardest to keep.

"You could decorate my crib nice. You know how much money I'm making now. You come with me. Then…if Edward knows what's good for him, he'll leave you alone. I don't wanna bring CJ into this, but I will."

"I don't know why. He just—he just said—one o'clock." I answered his first question, since I really wanted him to leave. Also, I didn't want to give an answer to anything else.

He looked to his phone. "I have to be somewheres anyway. We cool?"

I nodded. "Yeah." At this point, I'd say just about anything to make him get out of this house.

"You forgive me?"

I managed to conjure a smile. "Of course."

"That's my girl." He kissed my lips. "We'll work on things. I'll work on my temper, and you...well, you have to start listening. And cool it with the snacks." He squeezed my hip. "You've put on a few the last couple months."

"Okay." I rasped, my eyes on the floor.

"We'll get there . . . I love you, B."

On autopilot, I went to respond with "I love you, too", but something else came out, something that was at the forefront of my mind. "He really didn't do anything," I said.

Maybe Edward was becoming affiliated with CJ and his family, but they're not as close as him and Jake. Edward is new around here, and all that loyalty crap...since Jake's been here forever. He has a lot of friends.

And if CJ gets involved, I didn't know what would happen to Edward. I was scared to death already—no matter how many times Edward told me not to be—that Jake would get some of his people together and go after Edward and Jasper.

_I'd kill myself._

I'd really do it this time—not just plan it and chicken out.

Jake raised a brow.

"I-I love you."

He nodded, smiling. "I believe you . . . but he's dead. He thinks he's big and bad because his pops was whoever-the-fuck. But shit's changed. Those people know me. They're in my corner—"

"Don't—" I gripped his shirt. "Please. I'll do anything—I'll be better. I promise."

Jake held me close, toying with my wet hair, ignoring what I'd said. "It may not be today or tomorrow...When he least expects it…I mean, he stole my nine, but that's not the only one I have." His hand reached for his back, a silent reminder. "I'll do whatever it takes to make sure he leaves you alone. You're mine, Bella."

"He doesn't—It's not like that. He hasn't done anything." It was pointless to argue. "I am yours. Edward—Edward, he didn't do anything. Men fight all the time. You guys..."

Powerless, without a sliver of hope or any clue, my face crumbled and I cried.

Then I wondered if I could get to Edward's room, grab that nine, and—

"It'll be quick. No worries. Like he never came back."

I didn't reply. I'd just have to warn Edward, get him to leave Brooklyn, and beg him to take me along.

"I have to go. We'll catch up later? Maybe pack some things so you can stay with me?"

I tried my best to swallow my cries. "I'd like that."

With one more quick kiss, he got up and left.

Once I heard the door close, I ran into the bathroom and locked the door—fast to wash any traces of Jake away from my face. My stupid face. I hated my face. I brushed my teeth, and then I puked—had to keep brushing.

As I cleansed myself, I couldn't stop crying.

He should have killed me.

Death would surely feel better than . . .

I gulped, draping a towel over my shoulders while I left the bathroom. Usually, I'd be too scared to leave the confines of a locked space so soon after . . .

But I tiptoed toward Edward's bedroom.

Jake's nine was on Edward's nightstand.

I knew it'd be loaded.

It'd be so quick.

With one pop, it'd all be over. I could end my own suffering . . . my worthless, pointless existence.

But who would tell Edward to run?

When I heard someone come up the stoop steps, I swore my heart truly stopped, and I almost dropped the gun.

Scared, once again, I ran into my bedroom and locked the door.

I hoped it wasn't Jake.

Wanting to remain silent, I pulled all my blankets on top of me.

Maybe Edward or Jasper will think I wasn't home.

I'd go unnoticed.

Stay invisible.

When whoever left again, I'd be able to write Edward and Jasper a note, warning them about Jake.

Then I'd steal the gun.

I'd get far away from here.

Maybe they'd think I ran away? Spare Jasper the heartache?

"Bella!"

I cringed, closing my eyes tightly.

* * *

**Again, I did NOT write this lightly.**

**It's a huge part in the story.**

**I hope youse were able to get through it.**


	37. Chapter 37

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Still with me...?**

**Enjoy!**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter Thirty-Seven**

_**B**_elieve it or not, I managed without Jasper. Old man Ruffalo showed me the ropes, helped me out a lot. He had a bit of an attitude but was helpful nonetheless.

I expected a mob—to have a hard time, but the lunch crowd wasn't as large as I'd hoped today. When noon rolled around, I went out back to call Riley on my cell.

He told me to be ready to go by eight tonight. He'd be picking me up. Riley didn't say much more; however, I was excited for this—to get my feet wet. The way Colleoni Senior spoke last night, it sounded like I'd be doing something along the lines of what I did at the club—meeting these dudes in Tampa, making sure the truck was stocked with what we were promised, and having Riley's back.

It sounded simple enough.

Reentering the pizzeria, I saw Jake through the plate glass window. He walked by, winking as he did so, firing a thumb and forefinger pistol shot.

I cracked a grin, just nodding my head.

I knew shit wasn't over from the other night. Jake's the pussy-type to gather his boys and come at me with bats or some shit, so now it was just a waiting game.

But I planned to go for him first.

While I'm gone, Jasper will have to keep Bella in his sights, but when I come back . . .

It'll be over for Jake.

When he was out of sight, I called Jasper's house, hoping Bella would answer. Jake had come from that direction—from their home.

She didn't pick up, which alarmed me, although she could be on her way here.

Thinking of them being on the same street, I left the shop to look up and down the block.

I didn't see Bella or Jake...

Maybe Bella wasn't afraid of Jake, but I was wary of him. He wouldn't listen, that I knew to be true.

He had to be destroyed.

Not wanting to worry too much, I called Alice on my way back inside. She'd given me her number.

_"Hello?"_

"It's Edward," I said.

_"Hey!"_ Alice sounded happy. _"What's up?"_

"Is Bella with you?"

_"No…I left a while ago. She was getting ready to go see you,"_ she laughed. _"She wanted to surprise you and show up early."_

I hung up on her, ending the call, and running out of the pizzeria.

Something was off.

My intuition told me that much as I ran back to Jasper's.

I never bumped into Bella on the street; again, she wasn't on her way to Sal's.

The front door was locked, which eased some of my worries. I had to use my key to get in. "Bella!" I called out, receiving no answer.

Nothing looked amiss in the living room or the kitchen.

I went upstairs.

Stepping around the landing, I almost slipped. I'd stepped on Bella's nameplate, her necklace. "Bella?" The clasp was broken, and I picked it up to approach her bedroom door. I gritted my teeth, staring down to it as many thoughts flooded my mind.

The thought of Bella being with Jake again . . . it made me sick.

Angry, I shouted out for her again. "Bella!"

I received no answer.

"Open up!" I banged on her door.

Groaning to myself, my head a fucked mess, feeling like a madman . . .

"Bella!" Trying the knob, it was locked, so I knew she was in there. "Open this door!"

Jake had been here.

He broke her necklace . . .

He might have broken her.

Dread and horror filled my gut. My anger slightly ebbed as I felt my eyes prick; it was hard to swallow. I was instantly riled up again, but I tried my best to act calm. "Bella-Boo." I knocked softly, crooning. "Bella-Boo...Baby, open the door. Please."

I waited...for what was probably twenty seconds; meanwhile, it felt like years. Yet, I didn't hear anything. Even placing my ear to the door, I heard nothing.

"If-if you're in there...Bella, stand back." Fearing the worst—that, God forbid, she was too badly hurt to get to the door, I used my shoulder to push it open. It buckled, giving way, half coming off its hinge.

"Bel—" I panted, fear dashing through me when my eyes landed on her.

She was under her covers on the floor.

All I could see was her bed linens.

And I knew she was under them in the corner of her bedroom because the lump of blankets was shaking.

But she hadn't made a sound.


	38. Chapter 38

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter Thirty-Eight**

"Bella…?" I whispered, kneeling down. "Bella, baby…" Again, I received no response.

As fast as I could, I tore the blankets away from her.

And there she was...a naked, shaking, blubbering...a sobbing mess, but it was worse than last night, her body rocking from the force of those silent cries.

"Don't." She covered her eyes, curling up. "Please..."

The sight broke my heart as I gently gathered her into my arms. All of which only made her sob harder and beat against me. "I hate you! I hate you!" Her fists flew; I dodged them. "Don't touch me! Kill me. Kill me instead!"

"It's me," I whispered, taking her hands into mine. "Bella, baby...it's me. Edward."

Bella opened her eyes, blinked a few times, like she could see now. "Edward. Edward...Edward." She grabbed at me. "I'm sorry."

"Shhh…tell—tell me—" I couldn't get the words out. "Tell me he didn't." In the back of my mind, I think I already knew what happened here, but it was unfathomable.

Not Bella.

Not her.

This couldn't happen.

"I'm sorry—I—I didn't—didn't want to."

My body stiffened, my teeth gnashing together as I swore I was in the middle of a nightmare. I was so angry, livid and heated, and…I'd never been this mad before. Hate flowed through me, and I only knew one thing for sure.

I'd kill Jake where he stood.

And it'd be painful.

"I'm sorry."

"No—" I sucked my teeth, burying my face into her hair. I cried quietly—for her, out of anger. "Don't be sorry. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone." I hated myself in this moment, too.

Jake shouldn't have had access to her. I should have been here to protect her. I should have waited for her. Fuck the pizzeria. I should have waited for her and just opened late. What was I thinking?

A little over an hour.

_That's all it took._

Unless she let him in or didn't lock the door . . . No, Bella wouldn't have let him in.

A criminal like Jake probably broke into the house.

It'd been eighty minutes.

For eighty minutes, I'd left her alone.

Jake was probably watching, waiting, waiting for his shot.

When I left earlier, I didn't look around. I wasn't on point.

Even without a possible threat looming, I'm always looking everywhere.

I'd lived in war zones for nearly two years straight.

It's a habit.

I was on cloud nine, that sweet kiss she gave me before I left . . . I was distracted, acting like some teenager, not paying attention.

It wasn't Bella's fault.

And now I'd have to live with this guilt, this...

_It's not even about me._

How could someone hurt her? My little Bella-Boo-Baby.

_Eighty minutes . . ._

"I—I told him no—we-we said a lot of things. I didn't know what to do. I was scared." Her eyes met mine before she hid her face from me again. "Don't look. I need—I need my compact." She tried to get up.

"Shhh." I steadied her, but I was fast to take my hands back. "Relax...I-I need to see." I wanted to make sure she had no fractures. "Can I?" I gently touched her chin with my fingertip.

"No," she cried into her hands. "I'm, I'm gross—"

"No way. You're not gross. Baby, look at me. I need to make sure nothing's broken." My voice was barely above a whisper, pleading; Bella didn't move. "Please, don't hide that pretty face from me."

Her teeth chattered, and she kept her eyes closed as she turned her face back to me.

Not only did I see her busted lip, but I saw the bruises on the side of her face, the start of a black eye, the faint fingerprints on her neck, the purple teeth marks on her shoulder . . .

I thought I was going to explode; meanwhile, I had to play it cool.

The last thing I wanted was for Bella to be scared of me.

"Stop looking." She turned away. "I was—I was—"

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead, my own body shaking. "I promise. You'll never see him again. He won't bother you again—"

"He said he's going to kill you." She became more frantic, clawing at me. "You have to leave for a while—he has a lot of friends." She sucked in a shaky breath. "You can't stay here. I thought if I did…what I did…he'd—that's the only reason. I—I'm sorry."

"Shhh." My mind was in ten different places. "Don't be sorry, baby. Don't be sorry."

"You probably think—"

I shook my head. "I don't think anything."

"I didn't want to."

"I know," I said. "He could have killed you. And—"

"I wanted to die..." The heartbreaking wail that followed her statement . . . it gutted me, made my blood run cold. "Gram, my mom...I could—"

"Bella, no."

"He's cruel. He woul-wouldn't do it. Horses, they-they do that to horses."

"Put them...outta their misery?" I whispered. "You don't want that. Baby, you don't mean that. My God. Don't say that." I hugged her tightly to me, squeezing her, hoping to keep myself together as well.

"Every-Everyone would be better-better off."

I let her go, pulling back to look at her. "No, we wouldn't. Do you have any idea...? Baby, you don't want that. You have your whole life—your whole fucking life to live. Things are bad now, at the moment, but you'll get through it. You're going to go to college, get married, have babies...you'll have plenty of things to smile about. You don't want that." I kissed her hair, hugging her tight again, because I couldn't imagine.

I just couldn't fucking imagine...a world without Bella. "Promise me, you won't. You won't do that." Gazing into her sad, beautiful eyes, I saw her cheek and her busted lip again. "Baby…" I felt my face crumple for the briefest of seconds. "Promise me."

She was limp in my arms, hadn't uttered a word.

"Bella," I said to get her attention again. "Promise me."

She woke up, started panicking again. "You have to—You have to—"

"You don't worry about me. Okay? You don't worry. I promise you—Bella, I swear to Christ. But you gotta promise me, too." I wanted to call Jasper, tell him to get ass back here. Bella probably needed a hospital. "Bella?" I gently shook her to wake her up. "Stay with me, baby."

She wasn't asleep by any means, but she wasn't here. "I'm-I'm his, and my only way out—"

"No." I shook my head slowly, knowing she was in shock. I'd seen it overseas enough times for different reasons.

"I'll be fine tomorrow," she whispered. "It usually takes-takes a day. Then I'm fine."

I swallowed my cry. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell anyone? How long has...I mean—" It was hard to talk, but I had to pull myself together. Right now isn't about me. I had to be strong. I had to keep it cool. Play it cool.

She sniffled, had stopped crying for a moment, her eyes finding mine. "Don't tell Jasper. It was no big deal. You know? I just—" She sat up, still shaking.

"No big deal?" I asked, incredulous, furious.

"It was—it was like times before…when I didn't want to. Right? Then you give in and…" She trailed off, staring away from me. "It was over in minutes—"

"He attacked you."

"Don't say that." She covered her face with her hands.

"Come here." I gathered her into my arms again, making her sit on my lap.

"Get off!" she hollered, pushing me away. "Everyone needs to stop grabbing me!"

I put my palms up. "I'd never hurt you."

She sobbed, wailing. "He said that, too."

"I mean that," I whispered, dipping low to meet her gaze. "You have my word."

"Why…?" She slowly shook her head, at a loss for words.

I didn't comment or reply.

"He's coming back later to get me, I think." Her gaze was unseeing as she stared at the floor—like she was drifting away from me again. "Yeah, he said—but it's okay. If I go, maybe he'll leave you guys alone—"

"No, he's not taking you anywhere," I said. "You're not going anywhere with him."

"To keep the peace? Maybe I should. I was so stupid—"

"Don't say that!" I shouted, my anger misplaced. "You're not stupid, and you're not going anywhere with that creep. Understand?"

Bella straightened up again. "It was no big deal."

"You've said that, but…no big deal?" I found it comical but didn't dare laugh. "Bella—"

"I'm being a baby…drama-dramatic—" she hiccuped "—he was my boyfriend."

"If you said no, if you didn't want to—"

"He didn't rape me!" she shrieked.

I groaned, needing to hit something, my body stiffening again. "He did…What he did was wrong, so fucking wrong, and it is a big deal—a huge deal. Bella, listen to me. If you said no, if you didn't want to—"

"He didn't," she whispered, breathing shakily. "He made me—made me, um, he made me…" She hugged onto me tightly now.

"What'd he do?" I asked, leaning away to palm her cheeks, look at his handiwork once more. I was also able to ghost my thumbs over her features. Nothing felt broken. "Please, trust me. Bella, tell me."

She gulped, reaching for her neck. "My necklace—" she started panicking again "—where is it?"

"In my pocket." I pushed her hair out of her face. "I'll have it fixed—good as new." I waited for her to calm some, rubbing her hair down her back. "Talk to me. Tell me what he did. Just trust me."

"I didn't—didn't want to."

"I know," I whispered. "I know."

She averted her gaze, had started scooting away from me. "He, uh, wanted me to, to, um, blow him."

I let out a scream I couldn't hold onto, reaching out and punching her nightstand.

But I'm sure I would have reacted the same way no matter what she said—no matter what he made her do. Since I believed this wasn't the first time Jake had done some shit to her. That was still rape. Of all the cruel and horrible . . .

Bella jumped away from me, whimpering, curling into a ball and cringing into her nightstand as she shivered. "I'm sorry, Ed-Edward. Don't—not you. I'm sorry. I didn't want to. I didn't want to," she chanted.

"Christ...No, I'm sorry—" I reached for her. "Bella, baby, _I'm_ sorry. I'm angry, but it's not because of you. I'm so sorry, baby." I put my hand out, hoping she'd take it. "You did nothing wrong."

"Stop looking at me." The fight in her voice was stronger. "My disgusting body," she muttered, clawing to cover herself with the bedding. "I hate it." She wrapped herself up. "I'm-I'm—you think I'm a whore now. I am. It's okay."

I was already looking away. "I never said that. I don't think that—you are _not_ a whore. Do you have any idea how lucky-lucky I felt that—you picked me?" I shook my head as my tears fell onto the floor, knowing it wasn't the time nor the place to speak about what we'd done.

"You're not, Bella. You're not the least bit disgusting...and it's not your fault. None of this is your fault. You said no. You're a victim—"

"I'm no one's victim!" she shouted. "He was my boyfriend. It was nothing—"

"Okay," I whispered, not wanting to argue.

"Can you leave so I can get dressed?" She grabbed at her blankets again, almost covering her head. "I wanna take a nap, and, and—" She broke down in tears. "I didn't want you to see me like this…it's embarrassing. I just—I know you and me, I know we said—the coffee—I'm sorry."

"Hey…" I held her hand. "Relax, okay? You did nothing wrong." I didn't know what to say or what she was worried about.

"You hate me now. We agreed. We said—"

"Doesn't count." I rushed to say. "You...Bella, there was _nothing_ sexual about this. _Nothing_. What he did...it was a terrible, terrible thing, but—" I wasn't sure if I'd said that correctly. "I don't hate you. I'm not mad at you—"

Bella started to speak over me, a sobbing wreck again. "You're going to leave."

"No...I'm here. I'm _not_ leaving you, Bella. I won't. I'm here." I kissed her forehead, and then I pulled my shirt off. "Put this on."

She let me place it over her. "I'm sorry."

"Stop with the sorries." I hated that she kept apologizing. It killed me every time she said it. "You'll be okay. We'll get through this." I got under the blankets with her, holding her body tight against mine. "I'm not going anywhere."

"You think I'm gross now," she whispered.

"No." I lifted her chin and wiped her tears away the best I could. "Never. Never say that. I could _never_ think that. I think—"

I thought of a lot of things when it came to Bella.

Gross definitely _wasn't_ one of them.

"I think you're absolutely wonderful." She'd said that to me last night, and I truly thought the same of her. "I think you're gorgeous. This face is gorgeous." I brushed her cheek with the back of my fingers. "You have a very beautiful body...Bella, baby, you're perfect, and you're wonderful, and you're strong. You're so strong because we're gonna get through this, and when you're better, you'll see...you'll see how amazing you are."

I was crying for the first time in close to ten years. I just couldn't imagine . . . Bella's so small. She's adorable, and I couldn't see someone, a grown man especially, treating her this way, being cruel when Bella couldn't harm anyone.

She certainly can't defend herself.

Fucking with her head, making her think those horrible things about herself. He'd tear her down just to build himself up. That sick motherfucker.

My perfect Bella doesn't see herself clearly at all. We'll have to work on that, too, along with all the apologies.

_What kind of monster does something like this?_

_How many times has this happened before?_

"And you have to be okay." I held her cheeks again. "'Cause you're _my_ somebody."

Bella closed her eyes. "I'm sorry. The coffee—"

"No," I said. "You have nothing to be sorry about. You're wonderful, and beautiful, and gorgeous, and kind, and please don't be sorry. You did nothing—"

I stopped talking because I thought she was going to say something, but she whimpered, burying her head into my chest, squeezing my hands so tight her knuckles were white.

"You have to promise me. Get this dying stuff out of your head." I looked into her eyes again. "You're my somebody, which means I can't lose you. If you...If you kill yourself, I'll follow right after." It was a promise that really wasn't that difficult to keep.

"No," she whispered. "You—"

"Right after," I said again. "Now fucking promise me."

"I promise."

I held Bella until she fell asleep.

Then I woke her up when I tried to dress her, put pants on her. She let me do it, and then we snuggled some more, this time in her bed.

When the light outside started to dim, the sun had shifted, I heard Jasper enter the house. He called for us, and I quickly left Bella's bedroom.

He was home.

Bella wouldn't be alone.

And I could go find Jake.

"Edward—" Bella hopped up. "Don't." I knew what she was telling me, but I had mixed feelings about that. "Please, I can't—Jasper can't—I—he'll go after Jake and get himself killed."

"Okay," I whispered.

Leaving her bedroom, the anger flowed through me along with anticipation as I'd gone toward mine.

After I put on another shirt, I grabbed Jake's heat from my nightstand, and then I stomped down the stairs.

_I'd kill him with his own gun._

Jasper was in the kitchen, sipping from a bottle of water. "Hey, man."

I didn't say anything.

"Bella home?"

"She's sleeping," I said.

He furrowed his brow. "It's five o'clock."

"Stomachache." I shrugged.

He nodded. "I was gonna head to Sal's . . . Lemme go check on her—"

I stopped him. "I was just up there. She's fine."

His eyes became slits. "What's the deal with you two?"

I put my hands up in surrender. "I can't do this now, Jazz." I went to walk around him.

"Edward." He stood in front of me.

"I don't know." I was honest. "I'm sorry. I—I—I don't know how to answer you. We don't exactly have labels."

He slumped his shoulders. "You and Bella?"

I didn't confirm or deny. "I gotta go."

"You're sleeping with my sister, and you don't have the time—you can't talk to me or be honest about it?"

"It's not like that. We're not—" I had to keep my anger in check. "Riley should be here soon. I'll have my phone." There wasn't much left for me to say. "You got your keys. Ruffalo thinks I'm taking a small vacation…"

"Hold up. What?" He seemed confused.

My hands shook, and I needed to get the fuck out of this house.

"What happened today?" He stared at me.

I snorted without humor. "I wish—I wish I could tell you."

"But you and Bella…" He kicked the kitchen cabinet. "No matter what I say, youse two are gonna do what you want."

"I don't have time for this."

"Then go." He gestured for me to do so. "Go 'head."

"Jazz…I care for Bella. Know that. It's not about sex or what you said—availability. I genuinely…I never cared for a broad the way I do her. That's the truth. If we...evolve, become a couple, you'll be the first to know."

Bella definitely didn't need any of that right now, a boyfriend.

But she's mine. My somebody, and I'll be anything she wants or needs me to be.

At the present time, it'd be too hard to explain all that to Jasper. I'll try when I come back. There's no way Bella can really hide what happened today.

Or, can she?

_Fuck._

Jasper nodded, looking down. "I respect that. Thank you for telling me."

"I'd never hurt her. I'd never—" As I gawked at my best friend, I felt as though I was going to cry. "It's not what you think." It was hard to swallow, and I felt my chin wrinkle as I looked to the floor. "I'd never disrespect her."

"Bella could do worse…she _has_ done worse, but then she could do better." His tone was teasing and he was surprising me. I thought once he knew, he'd take a swing at me.

"I had a feeling." He held his forehead. "But now what? This'll start a war in the 'hood—who's behind Jake and then you…" He waved a hand at me. "You'll have to watch your back."

I nodded. "Not for long. Don't worry so much."

"Right…Jake's not a made guy. You'll outrank him soon enough, but you can't do anything now—at this moment. Just think before you do some shit."

"I've thought plenty . . . Don't worry about a thing. I got this." I patted his back before I went for the door.

"Wait a sec." He sprinted toward me. "Before you do something stupid, you need to go to your so-called uncle and ask him to sanction it. Just because he'll never be a member of the club means nothing. At this point, neither are you...but Jake_ is_ with a crew. CJ's crew." He nodded. "Better yet...go to CJ...but I'd wait...yeah, I'd wait until you at least rant—"

"Huh?" I played dumb.

"You'll need help—help _I_ can't give you. I'd say sit down with Emmett, but…I don't know. To nip this in the bud, make Jake leave the neighborhood—wait, that's what you wanna do, right? So, you don't have problems?"

I quirked a brow. "Kick him outta the 'hood . . . yeah, sure." My tone was sarcastic.

Jasper—who's staring at me mad hard right now, trying to study my face—is wise.

He obviously knows a lot about this shit—how being connected works.

He'd given me sound advice, but this wasn't Mr. Roger's neighborhood, or fucking _Sesame Street_.

_Leave the neighborhood . . ._

_I wanna Lambchop his balls off and make Jake leave the planet—the realm of the fucking living._

I couldn't exactly say that, could I?

I may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but I'm aware—know when I'd be making someone an accessory to murder.

"Whoa...What, uh—" Jasper backed away from me, realization coloring his face. "Did he do something?"

Before I could stop him, he ran up the stairs.

Jasper was in such a hurry, he tripped.

That was when I left, knowing Bella would be safe with her brother.


	39. Chapter 39

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Chapter Thirty-Nine**

_**O**_nce I got into my car, I peeled out of the driveway. I could have easily run to the dry cleaners—CJ's day spot—but I might be needing my car after that.

While I drove, my head whipped every which way, searching for Jake.

Alas, I didn't see him, and I didn't think I'd be that lucky—fortunate to find him so quickly.

After double parking in front of the store, I ran out of the car.

That Irina chick greeted me, but I was in no mood.

"I need to see Colleoni." My chest heaved, my body full of rage. I wasn't caged by the confines of Jasper's crib, but I still had to play it cool.

That's when the phone rang.

"Go on back." Irina stared at me.

I pushed the garment bags away from me as I stormed through the area, and the office door was open; I let myself in.

To my surprise, Riley and Marcus were in there with him.

"My dude, I was just about to call you—"

I put a finger up to stop Riley. "I need to speak with you alone."

CJ was lounging back in his chair with his feet on his desk. "Go." He snapped his fingers, making the other two leave. Once they were gone, he sat up straight. "How can I help you?"

"That motherfucker! He—he—" Ironically, I didn't know how to continue.

"What? Have a seat." He gestured to the chairs.

I shook my head as I started to pace. "I need the okay—I need your blessing."

"Who?" he asked.

"Jake—Jacob Black," I said.

"What'd he do?" He smirked at me. "You're just jumping right in. I dig it." He nodded.

"It's no joke—not funny!" I shouted. "He forced himself on her—she's a fucking mess!"

"Again, who are—" His face fell. "Bella?"

I cringed, swearing I was going to be sick. "They broke up—then _we_ had words." I shrugged. "Order of events isn't important."

"I saw him. You did a good job," he commented, tsking. "Poor baby...Is she okay?"

"No," I whispered. "He roughed her up pretty bad…He made her do some shit—attacked her."

"Honestly, bro…" He pursed his lips. "J's no one to me. A pawn, someone I use here and there for the odd job." He was nonchalant suddenly. "While I appreciate it, you don't need my permission. I don't give a fuck what you do to him . . . as long as it doesn't come back to bite you."

"I'll cover my ass," I growled out. "It won't come back to you either."

CJ sighed. "He did a terrible thing."

I pulled on my hair and nodded, but "terrible" can only begin to describe it. "Thank you." I made for the door.

"Lemme take care of it—"

"No." I whipped back to him.

"That's my baby sister's friend. Bella's family. _You're_ family, too. It's about honor—"

I shook my head. "I know all about honor. That's why it's on me."

"All right . . . but you need a plan." He poked his desk. "You tear through these streets with your new friends, Smith & Wesson, you'll get pinched."

Reluctantly, I took a seat—I sat in the chair, practically cradling my head. "He's a dead man."

"Look, go down to Tampa with Riley. I'll have someone take care of him—"

"He's mine!" I exclaimed. "Understand?"

He gave me a lopsided grin. "You and Bella?"

"Yeah." I nodded, telling the absolute truth. "She's mine, too." That's all he needed to know.

"Before we go any further—before I say any more—" he came from around his desk to face me "—are you in or out?" I knew what he was asking.

"In."


	40. Chapter 40

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter Forty**

_**M**_y run with Riley was put on hold. It's funny the way that worked out. The trip was still set to happen, but we were to leave in the morning instead.

Without much fanfare, only CJ and Riley knew of my plans to ice Jake.

However, CJ fed me shot after shot, like I needed it, like I wouldn't or couldn't follow through.

Riley drove around the neighborhood looking for Jake. It made sense, send the guy with the clear head.

As I told Carlisle about how I found Bella, he became angrier and angrier.

I loved it.

Sitting here, plotting and speaking of that mutt's death.

I wore a satisfied grin at the thought alone.

After tonight, Bella won't have to worry about him ever again.

What happened was very unfortunate, but she'll heal with help, and I'll be right beside her the whole way.

That was the weird thing . . .

This morning, I didn't know how I felt, was torn and confused.

But when she was threatened—threatened to be taken away from me, I made the split decision that I'd never let _anyone_ tear her from me.

Not even her brother, not even fucking Jasper.

She was mine . . .

I wanted her for me—for her to be mine.

And I'd protect her until my last dying breath.

It was remarkable, that amongst all the anguish going on inside of me, I was able to come to such a clear revelation.

_Who was I kidding any-fucking-way?_

Bella's adorable, sexy, gorgeous. Her body's perfect, as was her personality that I dug—the girl's as beautiful inside as she was outside, too.

There was love there since we'd known each other forever.

Having been away a while took little—very little—from that.

I always cared for her, even if I didn't think of her as someone to _be _with.

I'd never thought about being with _anyone_ before.

But Bella . . .

I wanted her hands, her eyes, her body, her fucking skin, her heart.

I wanted it all . . .

Although the sex was brief, I managed to feel more during that short span of time than I ever had my entire life.

She made me feel again.

I'd never had a girlfriend before. The way I see it, Bella never had a boyfriend—a man—before either.

We'll learn, we'll work on it together and hope for the best.

_Isn't that what people do anyway?_

No risk, no reward . . .

It's going to be a long road to recovery for her.

Though, when the time is right, I wanna go for it . . . us together.

I'll wait . . . I'll wait as long as I have to.

The only scary thought: what if we get through this and she doesn't want me? Want me in the same way I want her?

I'd have to let her go, I guess.

But Bella was mine—mine to care for, mine to cherish—and I need her in my life.

In any capacity.

If in the end, we'll only be friends...I'll learn to deal.

When CJ's cell phone rang, I picked my head up.

"Excellent. See you soon." He ended the call.

"What's up?" I asked, my leg bouncing with excitement.

"We got him…He was at that chick's house, Lauren." He rolled his eyes, leaving his chair. "Riley followed him home and then stuffed him in his trunk."

"Nice." I smiled.


	41. Chapter 41

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**WARNING: VIOLENCE**

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**Chapter Forty-One**

_**C**_J narrowed his eyes, pointing at me. "You surprise me. I didn't think you had it in you."

I didn't know how to reply to that.

"Then again, you were trained in warfare, a trained killer." He nodded slowly, pursing his lips. "You do well today. Hey, you might have a new career."

"Such as?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We need someone taken care of, boom, the job's yours. Easiest way to make it up the ladder. You hear me? Your name—I mean, your, uh, membership is a given? My pops said so." He bobbed his head. "You didn't outright earn it. Your father paved the way for you, just like mine did me. But I need to know you can be trusted, so we're rolling together. You're on my crew and you're guy, unless you wanna role with my father?"

"Whatever's clever." At the moment, it made no difference to me.

He grinned. "Stick with Riley. My pops said that, too—that he wants you to learn from Rye-Rye. You can shadow him—"

"Can we just do this?"

He smirked. "Impatient. I love it. I'm telling you. You could rack up some serious cash."

"Being a contract killer?"

He nodded. "Basically. This thing of ours . . . it's not all about icing cats. You know? But whacking fuckers is the only way to keep 'em in line, or..._move up_ the line."

"Move up?" I asked.

"Bumping fuckers off to _get_ a bump...a promotion, take their rank," he laughed. "It's quiet these days . . . It can be dog-eat-dog, though."

Nothing about that sounded honorable, but I didn't voice my opinion.

"Not everyone likes to do it—clipping motherfuckers. You'd basically be an assassin, fucking lethal. I think you got a lot'a heart. You'd excel."

Again, I had no reply.

"You ready to go?"

"Absolutely." I left my chair.

We didn't take my car. In fact, I had to give Marcus my keys, so he could bring it over to Jasper's. Carlisle had his boy Michael bring his whip around, and I rode shotgun.

With no clue as to where we were going, I just relaxed where I sat, but I inquired about what Jasper had said—about the 'hood being divided, what future qualms I might have.

Carlisle laughed. "When you're with somebody, a crew, people'll treat you differently. No worries. Jake'll disappear. We'll say he ran off with some broad."

I nodded.

"Maybe he's got his boys...I know he's close to Caius, who's a Volturi," he said that like it was supposed to mean something. I knew that last name, remembered it. Though, I didn't know of the dude he mentioned. "But I got all his boys by the balls. If Jake knew you were with me from the get? He'd've shit his pants, having beef with you. His buddies are no different. Just trust me."

"With all due respect—"

"I know." He stopped at a red light. "Trusting me is easier said than done. Over time…" He put his fist out for a pound.

I hit his hand with my own.

Not for nothing, if I was him, and some dude came to town . . . I'd feel threatened. Especially since his father embraced me, welcomed me back as if no time had passed.

I'm just saying...if _I_ was him.

Carlisle Colleoni Jr. was definitely someone I had to look out for, although I hoped for the best—that what he'd said was genuine.

"I'm no saint. I live, eat, and breathe this 'hood," he laughed.

He might talk like he's from here. But just looking at him, there's nothing "'hood" about CJ.

"I take care of my people like my father taught me. You'll learn to do the same." He sucked his teeth. "Poor baby—Isabella." He groaned, hitting his steering wheel. "Had she or Alice come to me? I would'a popped Jake myself. Trust."

"I'm glad to hear you say that." His previous words meant dick to me, because they were only words, but the conviction he had…when he said their names…well, I hoped he was telling the truth.

We were now riding along the water—all the way down near Shore Road in Bay Ridge, and we kept on driving. I was under the impression we'd hop onto the BQE and head to Manhattan.

When we approached a large dock near Sixtieth Street, he pulled off and parked on a side road before we went on foot.

He led me to an empty warehouse. It must have been seven stories with broken, blacked-out windows, was dark and stank of mildew.

"Watch your step."

I made sure to look down every once in a while; trash littered the floor as I followed him down to a cellar.

"It's the summer—clear now, but during the winter, man...It's filled with bums and crackheads and shit."

I nodded, going down the steps.

When CJ opened a door, there was light. The room we entered was pretty large, and there was only one way out that I saw—the door we'd gone through.

"Youse got hea quick," Riley commented, drinking a can of Pepsi.

I paid him no mind, my eyes finding Jake instantly.

That motherfucker was on the floor, bloodied and beaten already, which led me to believe he put up a fight when Riley approached him.

Sweat dripped off his chin, and he was hogtied.

I smiled as I stared at him, the possibilities endless in my mind, thinking of all that I could do to him.

"This is all you," CJ said, lighting a cigarette. "We'll be—" He jerked his head toward the stairs.

I ignored him.

"On second thought." CJ came over to kick Jake in the gut. _"Disgraziato!"_

Jake coughed, curling in on himself.

I snickered, pulling the gag out of his mouth.

"Leave it in," CJ instructed. "Unless…You know what?" He faced Riley. "I'd love to hear him scream." He blew his smoke into the air before he put the cigarette out on Jake's cheek.

Jake kept his mouth closed, trying not to scream as his sweat made the cherry sizzle and go out.

"Hey, fucko!" CJ pulled his hair, dragged him to sit up. "Tell me where you get the H from? I know it's Emmett's connect—humor me."

"Fuck you!" Jake shouted. "I kicked-up every week for your protection. You take his side, a nobody—"

CJ cut him off with his fist, and I enjoyed the show. "Chump change. You're small-time, Black. And your tribute hardly earned you a hello . . . Let's try again. Who's your connection?"

"What's this about?" I asked him.

CJ rolled his eyes. "It's why I keep Emmett and this fucktard around. It's McCarty's connection . . . I know my pops don't like drugs in our 'hood." He looked back to Riley. "It brings in dough, though, so..." He bent low down to Jake, asking once more.

My eyes stayed on Riley, and he shook his head at me while CJ wasn't looking.

I'd have to remember to ask about that at a later time.

"Tell him," I said, inching closer to Jake, staring dead into his eyes. "Now." Even though he was tied, I reached between the ropes to grasp his hand. I bent it at an odd angle, and I didn't stop until I heard a snap.

Jake cried out, flopping around like a fish on dry land.

"Yo!" CJ boomed, laughing his ass off. "Oh, that was priceless." He gave his boy a high five.

"Tell him," I said, "before I start with your fingers. Then I'll break each of your toes before I, uh, go for other things." I smiled, my eyes trailing down his form.

About to lie through my teeth, I pointed to my face, "This is me calm. Try not to piss me off." Inside, I was vexed to the highest degree. I couldn't believe I was still in one piece, thought I should have exploded with how much anger filled me.

Jake tried to catch his breath and get a few words out, but he didn't do it fast enough.

I kicked his face in—got him right in the nose.

When I heard that crunch, I bent low again to be a menace.

* * *

**Oh...this is only the beginning. The next couple of chapters will have warnings...for violence.**


	42. Chapter 42

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**WARNING: VIOLENCE, scenes of torture.**

**But I have a feeling, those of you still with me will love this :-)**

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**Chapter Forty-Two**

**_P_**ersonally, I would have had more fun—it would have been more satisfying if Jake wasn't tied up.

Nevertheless, after his nose was broken, he gave the name right up to CJ. That fucker even took out a pen and paper, jotting the information down. Jake'd mentioned some guy from Hoboken, New Jersey, gave up the address, too.

That piece of shit was very compliant, but I didn't give a fuck.

"We'll be upstairs." CJ hit my shoulder.

Jake, who had his mouth gagged again, screamed for them.

His muffled cries made me chuckle, and I took the gag out to hear them better.

"We're alone," I smiled. "It's not the most, uh, romantic setting, but—" I stood up. "How 'bout you suck _my_ dick?" I started to undo my pants.

His eyes widened.

"Come on." I took my soft cock out, my stomach rolling in disgust. "You suck me off good, you leave with your life," I lied.

Jake opened his mouth to speak, about to protest.

My cock forgotten, I grabbed my gun, quick to place it to his dome. "Put it in your fucking mouth!" I spat through gritted teeth, pushing the barrel into his forehead. "You deaf or somethin'? Suck my dick, you pussy-motherfucker." Fear rolled off of him in waves, and it fed me, filled me with glee—his misery. "I like it when bitches play with my balls, too . . . come on," I encouraged, trailing my .357 down toward his mouth.

Jake was shaking, sweat was pouring off of him as he leaned forward and licked his lips.

Opened his mouth.

Waiting . . .

Amused, I hopped back, but my hand came down to pistol-whip him. I clocked him with my heat.

His body fell back, rocking with sobs while I laughed.

"You were gonna do it?" I shook my head. "You nasty fuck. You should be so lucky . . ." I punched his chest as hard as I could, hoping his heart would skip a beat, he'd be winded again. "While you were running around the 'hood, playing gangsta', Bella was screaming my name—screaming in pleasure. Unlike you, I didn't have to force shit. Did you know that?"

His eyes narrowed.

"Yeah, I got lucky, was lucky enough to snag her away." I smiled. "And when she came..." I kissed my fingertips. "It was beautiful. She hugged my cock so tight. Hmm."

Jake was shaking, sweating, whatever. Angry...who gives a fuck?

"It's true." I kept talking. "I'm the reason. _I_ stole your girl, man." Curious, I took off the restraints. "Wait...are you a man? No, it's doubtful. Could be why Bella chose me. She likes real men...She's mine now, you know . . . sorry sack of shit, beating on someone so small, a woman. Did that make you feel like a man?" I kicked him in the stomach again.

There wasn't much he could do, and I'd been told he wasn't strapped. Riley checked him already.

"Huh...?" I waited for an answer.

Jake stayed in the fetal position, holding his hand to his chest. "She's nothing but a cooz, man. I don't deserve this—she was my girl."

"Was," I said. "She's mine now."

"Look, you can have her." He started to cry. "Just let me go."

"Awww." I pouted; meanwhile, this was the most exhilarating feeling I'd ever had, having his pathetic life in my hands. I'd been waiting. Granted, once he did what he did, I didn't have to wait long. But...I loved this, being able to do this for Bella. My girl. Mine. He was stupid enough to hurt her, put his hands on her, use her. So fucking stupid.

"You're a fucking sellout—a piece of shit. You sold out your best friend? Gave up Em's connect, too?" I tsked, shaking my head.

"Please…"

"Did Bella say please? Did she beg? Did she—" I pulled on one of his fingers. "You'd build yourself up by tearing her down. Pathetic!"

If it weren't for the skin, his finger would have detached.

"Stop," he screamed.

"Did you stop when she asked?"

_Snap went another finger._

"God, please stop!" he shouted.

_And...snap._

"Oh my God!"

He was just scum, a low-down, no good douchebag.

_Snap. Snap._

That's the way I saw him.

"You see me? I'm the fucker that's gonna kill you. So, go 'head…call for your God, but—" I looked around us "—I don't see him anywhere...God…?" I called out to the empty room, cupping my ear and waiting for a response, my eyes slowly going back to Jake. "He's not here, but feel free to leave a message." I kicked him in the chest, making him fall back.

"Please—"

I laughed, bringing him up to his knees again.

"Please, man—"

Cutting him off with my fist, I got him in the mouth.

Then I pulled him to the wall, so I could sit him up.

I'd had enough of this, his cries getting on my fucking nerves.

"No...please!" he shouted, trying to fight against me.

Without the finesse of my silenced piece, I placed one hand under his chin and my other at the nape of his neck.

Then I twisted, using all my strength, even as he fought against me, until I heard the crack—his spine shattering.

_Snap. Pop. Snap._

When he lay there lifeless, I stared at him for a long moment.

And I felt nothing.

Nothing but a huge weight lifted from my shoulders.

And I was suddenly in the mood for a bowl of Rice Krispies.

Happy with the end result, I sought CJ and Riley, figuring I'd have to get busy digging a hole somewhere.

* * *

_**Huh...I thought it spanned to ch43. My mistake :/ sorry. Torture ends here. LOL.**_

_**Thank you for reading.**_

_**Please leave me your thoughts.**_

_**I know my A/N a few chapters back might have seemed harsh. I love all of you. I'm humbled you all enjoy the stories, actually read my words. Some just pissed me off, nagging the ever-loving shit outta me. Gah! :-)**_


	43. Chapter 43

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter Forty-Three**

_**T**_hey were impressed with how I'd gone about killing Jake. They took bets—Riley thinking I'd beat him to death—use my hands, while CJ thought I'd use my heat.

Riley—who I learned would be my unofficial trainer—made me bring his car around.

The street was desolate as CJ took point, being a lookout, while we loaded Jake into Riley's trunk again. We'd already wrapped him up in garbage bags.

CJ said he had to leave, but that he'd be in touch.

Riley drove while I rode shotgun as we made our way back to Bensonhurst. All he kept talking about was how lethal I was, how I'd be a great asset to the game.

And all I could think about was getting back to Bella.

Unfortunately, I wouldn't see Bella for a while longer.

"What was that about...before?" I asked, staring at Riley's profile. "CJ wanting Emmett's connection info?"

"Your godfather doesn't like drugs. Stay away from it."

I nodded.

"I'm serious . . . Leave that to CJ. It's not like he'd make you get involved in that, knowing one word to his pops would result in some shit."

"Okay," I said.

"Remember what I said?" He tapped his nose. "That night? Your loyalties are to Colleoni...not his son, who does his own thing. Being on CJ's crew...sure, you gotta listen and kick-up to him. But he'd never make you sling drugs, although he might try to bring you into it. Just stay away from that garbage."

"Duly noted." I looked out the window, to the quiet streets.

"Let CJ do what he does. Soon, you'll have your own shit going. And we _never_ had this conversation."

I didn't comment, but I appreciated him looking out for me.

"Colleoni trusts me...CJ trusts me, too. I'm with Ceej to fucking babysit." He scoffed. "I should have my own fucking crew already."

I raised a brow, just listening.

"I paid my dues...did what I did _while_ I was going to school. Junior comes home from Princeton, and I gotta take a backseat."

"Huh..." I looked at my cell for the time. "Sounds like...you got some hostility." I couldn't imagine why he'd tell me this shit.

"It is what it is." His tone was hushed as he turned a corner. "I gotta feeling...I keep doing the right thing, it'll all work out soon enough."

I nodded.

"I'm placing, uh, blind faith in you, my man." He hit my arm. "I'm gonna trust you. 'Cause you gotta trust me, too, and know...I have nothing to gain by lying to you. Same with you. I know you're sketchy about Colleoni and CJ."

I didn't say anything.

"Since you're takin' point from me, just listen when I talk. You make your own assumptions, draw your own conclusions."

"I appreciate that," I said.

Riley brought me to a butcher shop on Bath Avenue. This time, he looked out for me while I hitched Jake over my shoulder and brought him inside. Without a clue as to what I'd have to do, I placed Jake on the large metallic table in the back.

"Get busy." He handed me a butcher knife. "Get hackin', know what I mean?" He unwrapped Jake's body, tossing the bags away. "You cut a little, around the skin—" he brought the knife to Jake's elbow, making blood ooze, as he carved to the bone "—go for the joints first, and then twist—" he grimaced as he did so "—and pull." Jake's forearm and hand came clean off. "You all right? You look a little green."

I blew out a slow breath. "I'm good." I swallowed my nerves.

"I'll man the grinder—don't wanna be here all night." He pushed the body part into the machine, making it disappear. "Chop-Chop," he guffawed.

Still clean, I took my shirt and chain off before I got to work.

Making Jake . . . literally disappear.

**_/=/=/=/=/_**

It was two o'clock in the morning when it was all said and done.

Briefly, before I left him, I heard Riley tell Colleoni I'd done a great job. Again, I thought he'd call CJ, but it seemed my godfather knew what was going down also.

With the stink of bleach stuck in my nose and wearing a stranger's clothes—we'd set fire to my old attire—I walked back to Jasper's house.

My immediate thoughts were still of Bella, wondering what I'd tell her—what I _could _tell her.

I knew I wanted to alleviate her fears, soothe her, be there for her . . .

Sadly, I was still leaving for Tampa in the morning—there was no getting out of it, the ride was only put on hold until the a.m.—and I didn't know what all that would bring.

But tonight was one helluva initiation into the Colleoni Family.

I knew that to be true while I used my key to enter the house.

Meanwhile, it baffled me that Bella and my trip to Florida occupied my mind.

Logically, I knew Jake got what he deserved. It was long overdue.

Riley and CJ told me it'd be all right; I wouldn't get caught or do life in prison.

_No body, no crime._

I had nothing to worry about, but Bella and my own peace of mind.

My mind was fine, yet I didn't know what that meant. It was awesome, though—having a clear head, knowing I'd be just fine to take care of Bella. It just sucked because . . . I was leaving in the morning.

I didn't have a choice.

"Edward?" Jasper approached me with a bat. "Just making sure." It hit the floor. "She wouldn't tell me what he did." He paced in the foyer. "But did you see her face? I got the Neosporin and we iced it. I gave her Tylenol—" He was a worried sick mess. "I think I should take her to a doctor. She's not telling me something, and she refused the emergency room—"

I placed my hand on his shoulder. "I took care of it."

He stared at me for a long moment.

My best friend surprised me by not having a comment.

In hindsight, I hadn't told him anything. I didn't confirm—well, I kind of did, but Jasper didn't ask any questions.

"She still up?" I asked.

"She was, uh, waiting for you…keeps taking baths, has filled the tub ten times, but she does that often."

"She does?" I asked, wondering why he didn't think that was odd. "Tub or not, have you checked on her?" I was about to run.

"I was just up there..." I heard him say.

I turned back to him.

"There are no razors, or box cutters here." He pushed his hair back. "Since Gram died, there are no meds in the house, nothing she can hurt herself with—"

My stomach rolled. "Uh...she's tried something like that before?" There was more shit my buddy had neglected to tell me.

His eyes came to land on my waist, and I'd realized my heat wasn't covered. "_That's_ what Colleoni gave you." He nodded, speaking to himself. "I didn't know you had a gun now."

"It was in the bag," I whispered, my mind reeling.

"Look, you have to lock it up, or move—"

"Done. But answer my question." I stepped closer to him. "Shit is that bad? She's tried to—"

"After Gram, she-she took it hard." He wiped the tears from his eyes.

"You sure it was because of Gram?" I snorted without humor.

"Gram was Gram. She was also Bella's mom, her dad." He nodded.

"Why isn't she on medication? Or in therapy? Or...Did you ever get her any help? Bring her to talk to somebody?" I was in disbelief, dumbfounded. On the surface...I mean...I had no idea. Couldn't tell. Not really. Not until I heard the shit she was saying earlier. "Have ever even—"

"One time...she cut herself. She tried to tell me it was an accident, I didn't believe her. The doc who did her stitches sent a counselor in. And Bella said nothing—said she missed Gram, was distracted and cut herself while doing dishes." He shrugged.

"They believed her? They didn't keep her for observation?"

Sadly, I knew from experience what comes with a suicide attempt. When I was sixteen, my mother was held for a week after mixing medication with a bottle of whiskey. They called it a cry for help, and her stay was longer than the usual seventy-two hours because she was detoxing from all the booze as well.

After, my mother went to therapy, stopped drinking, went to meetings...Things started looking up. I got to see my mother—the person she truly was—but she fell off the wagon a few months later, obviously stopped taking her antidepressants.

Maybe I was a coldhearted bastard of a son, because I couldn't go through that again—sit by, take care of her, watch her drink herself to death.

I enlisted early . . . got her to sign my fate away.

He ignored me, kept talking. "No. I was scared shitless because she wasn't seventeen yet. I thought they'd take her—put her in Foster Care, or a home, or...I don't know," he rambled, pacing back and forth. "They didn't. They didn't do anything, but they suggested grief counseling if she was so distraught. The doc who evaluated her said Bella wasn't a threat to herself—maybe depressed, sad because of Gram—but the doctor said it happens, whatever. In time, he said Bella would be okay. He saw nothing wrong with her mentally, which eased my mind."

I waited for him to say more.

"We did that...the counseling. It didn't work because she wouldn't talk. Things got better, she got better." He was crying. "I did my best. She moved on. She—I did my best."

"Hey, I believe you," I whispered. "I don't think it was all Gram. He's done that before."

Jasper stared up the stairs, cringing and stiffening. "Oh, God..." He started sobbing.

"You—" I didn't wanna be angry with him, for letting his sixteen year old sister date someone who was...Jake, who was four years older, likely the age of twenty. "She was sixteen. Jake—"

He widened his arms. "I didn't know they were together until she was already seventeen. It was legal. She wouldn't listen, no matter what I said." He spoke with his hands. "I told her how many-fucking-times, he was no good!" Jazz kicked the banister. "When she went on a date with Emmett, I flipped the fuck out, and then nothing...I thought she stopped dating. I didn't hear shit about her being with another guy for months. Then suddenly she's with Jake, and I find out they'd been seeing each other on the low for months. Had I known—when I _could_ have stopped it, done something, anything within my power—you think I would'a let it go on?"

I didn't say anything, needing to have faith in my best friend.

"In case you haven't noticed, she's one helluva secret keeper. She fucking hides from me—hides everything. But no more." He shook his head. "No fucking more!" he shouted up the stairs.

"Be easy." I nudged that fucker hard. "You think she needs someone else yellin' at her right now?"

"Oh!" He pushed me back. "Eddie-Come-Lately ova hea rides in to save the day!" Jasper stepped to me.

I seethed in his face, our chests touching before I backed away. "I'm not doing this." Again, I needed to check my temper. Jasper wasn't my enemy. "You wanna take a swing at me? We'll go outside—"

"To prove my point!" he shouted. "The only reason I know about you two is because of _you_!" He waved a hand at me. "The way you fucking act around her—look at her, whatever. And again, I can tell you both—express my distaste, tell you how I don't think she's ready for another boyfriend—" his tone was condescending "—but is there really anything keeping you two apart? Even if you moved out, if I _kicked_ you out—which I wouldn't do—would space even stop youse?"

"No," I said, and before he could say more, I continued. "It's not like that, though. I'm not using her. I adore her. I'd never disrespect her. Nothing's happened just yet...and I'm not even her boyfriend. But I hope one day...I can earn her trust, I hope..one day, I can be her man. I hope I can be with her. Jazz, I don't think I can stay away from her. I have feelings for her. As long as she wants me, I'll be here...for her, as a close friend until she wants more." I was nervous suddenly, but it felt so good to get all of that off my chest.

"If you hurt her—"

"Never," I said.

He nodded, refusing to face me.

"Jasper..." I put my hand out, hoping he'd take it.

"Why didn't she tell me?" Instead of shaking on it, he cried into his palms for a brief moment. "I was so scared."

"Me, too," I admitted.

He took a deep breath through his nose. "I made her some soup. I didn't know what to do besides take care of...her face. She was so upset. More upset that, that I saw her. Like she should be embarrassed, _should_ hide from me." He pointed to himself. "She didn't want me to call Alice or the mean one—her friends. She threw a fit when I mentioned the emergency room—swears she's not hurt badly."

"Hey…" I pulled him in to me. "She'll be all right." I embraced him tightly. "We'll make sure."

"I've always done my best to take care of her. We're a team. She's all I have," he whispered.

"You got me now, too."

He chuckled, leaning away to wipe his face of tears. "Right."

"It's true." I shrugged, looking down, feeling exposed in some way. "I'm not using her. I care for her—you both got me, too, and I have you guys." I placed my hands in my pockets. "I—I'm serious."

"No, I know, man." He grasped my hand. "As far as that goes . . . I don't know. It'll take some time to get used to. You guys get to that point, you just better treat her good."

"Like a queen," I promised. "It's not like…hey, I don't know what we are either. When I know, you'll be the first I tell."

"Bet. Just be straight with me." He patted my back. "Crazy fucking night. I keep—I keep thinking, I should have been home—"

I went for the stairs. "You're good? I wanna check on her right quick."

"Tomorrow...I wanna talk to her. I want her to be honest with me." He shook his head.

"Just be patient," I said.

He blew out a breath, his shoulders slumping. "Jake—"

"No worries there."

"I can relax now," he spoke to himself, kicking the bat away. "I need a fucking beer." Jasper went for the kitchen. "You want one?" He called back to me.

"I'm good."

The weird thing about tonight? No matter what I'd done—clipping Jake and then cleaning the scene, getting the truth from Jasper—this, walking upstairs to Bella's room, had my heart beating out of my chest. I was nervous and fearful because I didn't know the answers—how I should or could answer her questions. I knew there'd be a few.

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	44. Chapter 44

**Tribute**

**Chapter Forty-Four**

_**A**_pproaching her door, I didn't want to startle her, so I knocked lightly. "Bella?" I whispered, but no one was in there.

That's when I heard the water going in the bathroom, remembered she was in the tub.

Still apprehensive, I knocked on that door. "Bella?"

"Edward?" she asked, sounding out of breath. "Edward!" She seemed relieved as she tore open the door and ran into my arms; she was soaking wet, covered by a towel.

I smiled, hugging her tightly. "How you holding up?"

She had tears in her eyes. "I'm better now. Jasper said you left. I was worried—"

"What'chu gotta worry about?" I lifted her chin. "Huh?"

She looked away from me, hiding her face.

"Don't hide from me," I begged. "Please."

She swallowed loudly, unleashing her beautiful yet sorrowful gaze on me. "I'm so happy you're okay...I'm happy you're here."

"Me too," I said, getting lost in those eyes. "You look tired."

"I just—I need to, um." She glanced back to the bathtub, but she looked better. Bella was still bruised, of course, she just seemed sad and...calm, not as distraught as she had been?

Earlier, she said she'd be better tomorrow, like she knew her own grief time.

"I wanna finish my bath."

_How many times had shit like this happened?_

"Oh…go 'head," I said.

"Um…" Her eyes fell to the floor. "Can I stay in your room tonight?"

"Whatever you want." I kissed her forehead. "Take your bath. I'll go talk to Jazz and then—"

"Turn around."

I did as she said, my entire body facing away from her. That's when I heard the water rippling from her movements. "Bella—"

"You can turn around now." She sounded so young—little when she said that.

I faced her, her body covered by a million bubbles. The vision made me smile. "I'll see you when you're done. Take your bath."

"Sit with me," she whispered, closing the shower curtain, obstructing any view I had.

"Okay." I had mixed feelings about being in here. After all, Jasper was downstairs and could walk up here at any moment. "So…?"

I heard her whimpering. She started sobbing.

I got onto my knees, peeking around the curtain but keeping my eyes closed. "I'm so sorry this happened."

"You can look at me . . . You already saw me," she whispered.

I opened my eyes to smile. "Hey, beautiful."

She cracked a small grin, her chin resting on her knee.

"You're adorable." I chuckled.

She blew air up to her eyes. "I keep crying—I'm being silly." She grabbed a washcloth and then scrubbed at her cheek.

"Be easy. I like this skin. You'll tear it off." I took it from her to gently clean the area that looked pretty good already. "You're not being silly...Did he—" I didn't wanna ask what was on the tip of my tongue, if he'd . . . Fuck.

I couldn't even finish the sentence in my head.

Instantly vexed, I thought about that fuck's mangled body—him lying lifeless on that large table.

The mental image helped ease the agitation away.

"He did." She slapped her own cheek. "My stupid face."

"Bella!" I exclaimed, stopping her hands. "Please, don't do that." I gritted my teeth, trying to keep my expression neutral.

"I'm sorry."

I shook my head. "Don't be sorry. Just stop hurting yourself . . . my baby." I blew out a breath, pushing her wet hair behind her ear. "I love this face. Don't hurt it."

_I hoped some day soon she'd love it as well._

"What about counseling?" I asked. "Talk therapy?"

She grimaced. "No."

"Why not?" I shrugged. "When I came back from Iraq...my first deployment, I had to sit and talk to someone. It wasn't so bad." I wouldn't tell her it was mandatory for my unit, since we'd seen mad shit. War isn't what it used to be, at least it's not like the movies, or the history books, impressions we get of wars before.

These days, Uncle Sam cares about our psyches, as the government rightfully should—should have always taken the best care. A minor injury, a small disability can tear you from the front-lines and have you taking a backseat, or—depending—have you sitting in front of your TV within a week, sometimes days.

Regardless, I was fine. I'd always been alone, so I was used to not having anyone to confide in.

And they'd done a pretty good job letting us know what to expect when we got over there.

I did, however, speak about my time away with a therapist. It wasn't that bad, not at all. There was no judgment, although we were all informed not to talk of certain things. It was a contradiction in terms, but okay nonetheless.

And then it felt like no time had passed before I was heading to Afghanistan.

I had a feeling Bella could truly benefit from it—therapy.

If she opens up, actually speaks.

"It was fifty bucks an hour last time. That costs too much money. I don't have insurance—"

"I don't want you to worry about that," I said. "That should be the last thing on your mind. You wanna go? We'll make sure you can. I mean, please. I'll go with you, or Jasper...one of us would be with you until you could go by yourself."

She shook her head.

"Think about it?" I raised a brow. "For me? I'd feel so much better if—"

"I'll be fine, back to normal before you know it." She smiled brightly, but...she was totally full of shit.

And I didn't want to tell her . . . that what _she_ thinks is normal isn't . . . it's not fine, whatever.

"Bella..."

"Stop looking at me like that." Her act crumbled before my eyes. "I'll be fine. I promise."

"Because you know from experience?" I asked. "This has happened before? Has happened a lot?"

She scooted back, away from me. "I'm sorry...no."

"I'm not mad." I grasped her hand. "I want you to talk to me—talk to someone." At a loss, I hoped she'd open up.

"I—" She opened and closed her mouth a few times, gaping like a fish.

I waited.

"I get shaken up...but I'll be fine. I'll-I'll—you'll see." She nodded.

I kissed her palm. "There's nothing you can't tell me. Nothing's going to scare me away. Okay? I'm here, and you need to speak up. It'll eat you alive if you don't."

"Promise?"

I furrowed my brow.

"You won't leave?"

I grinned. "I still have to go on that run, but I'll be back. I'll be back in a few days."

"Okay." She squeezed my hand.

Silence fell upon us, and I got comfortable, leaning my back against the toilet.

"Um..." Bella stared at me.

Again, I waited, encouraging her with a quirked brow.

"Today...um, it wasn't bad. He-he didn't want sex, you know? Before today, he'd-he'd been leaving me alone. Sort of. Only because I never let myself be alone with him." She stared at me expectantly.

It was my cue to say something. "Good. Good for you."

The corner of her mouth pulled up a little. "I was-was keeping my distance...when I realized, started to think it was wrong," she cried. "He just didn't have the opportunity...then you came home."

I nodded.

"It's still not that bad. He was-was my boyfriend." I didn't comment. "Sleeping with your boyfriend is normal . . . He hasn't had me in over a month, though. I've been so lucky," she whimpered, held back her cries. "I was in school, lied and said I had to study for finals. Alice and I would study all the time. And Jasper made a rule...no matter how old I was, my friends and Jake weren't allowed to stay past nine...on school nights."

"Jasper sounds like a fierce momma-bear," I joked.

"You'd think not...but he's strict. I'm eighteen now, so he's let up a bit."

"How did you hide it?" I asked.

"Makeup, or...I'd just never give him a reason."

"You'd—"

"It was sex...he was my boyfriend," she repeated.

"Okay," I sighed.

"I didn't think there was anything wrong until I _knew_ it was wrong." That made sense, and it broke my fucking heart; she didn't know any better. "As of late, for the past month, I'd just be around people...When summer started, we'd wear out our welcome at Alice's...or you were here. Jake would get tired of waiting for you to leave, so we'd go to Alice's...he'd always try to get me to go to his apartment—" She blew a breath up to her eyes.

I gave her hand a squeeze, now realizing why she'd been following me around last week. It wasn't all about her feelings for me. "It's okay." I could only imagine it being an everyday struggle; meanwhile, she's only been out of school a couple of weeks. I haven't been here that long at all, but every day . . . she had to try and dodge him.

"I just got lucky," she said. "Someone was always around, but before that...on weekends, when there'd be no school, before you came back—"

I nodded, waiting for her to say more, whatever she wanted to tell me.

"I wouldn't complain...we'd have sex." She shrugged.

"Was it...sex, though?" I asked.

Bella wouldn't answer that. "Being with you—" her chin wrinkled "—it was beautiful, nothing like what I knew. I don't even know who that person was." What we shared was special, I knew that to be true, and I was lucky...lucky to be with her.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know..." She trailed off. "Like...I was trying to act, be sexy? I didn't think. I just did, but...I was wrong," Bella cried. "I shouldn't have pressured you. I know that was wrong now, too." She spoke so fast. "Like...I did to you what Jake has done to me, just—"

"Hey," I palmed her cheek, a chuckle escaping me "I'm a big guy. I could have said no and ran away from you. Bella, you didn't _make_ me do anything. Okay?"

She sucked in a shaky breath.

"Baby, I wanted to be with you in the worst way. I'm—" It really didn't seem like the time to...tell her how I felt...without feeling like a pervert-skeeze. "It was beautiful." I leaned forward to kiss her forehead. "Thank you for sharing...so much of yourself with me. And yes, you were very, very sexy."

"I wanna be that person again...so sure, so-so bold. The person you—" She stopped talking. Bella sniffled, picking up the washcloth to scrub her face again. Her cheek, where he likely . . .

"Where? Here?" I ran my thumb along her cheek. "Is this where he...?"

She wouldn't look at me, nodding.

I placed a gentle kiss there. "Better?" Then I kissed that same spot again and again. "How's that?" I crooned.

"Th-thank you." She shook her head, silent tears falling. "I'm sorry." She started to sob. "I'll be better in the morning...I-I just need sleep."

"Don't be sorry. Baby, you did nothing wrong. There's nothing wrong with crying or being upset." I kissed her forehead, both of her cheeks, her nose. "You're allowed to feel the way you feel, but you get too upset, you need to talk...I hope you confide in Jasper or me, or someone. We're here for you." I was scared of her doing something stupid—gets too down, wants to hurt herself. "You promised me," I whispered.

"I won't...I'll be okay." Her body shook, and then she swallowed down her cries. "Thank-thank you," Bella stammered.

Without instruction, I ran the warm cloth along her shoulders.

"That feels nice." She hugged her knees to her chest. "Thanks."

She didn't need to thank me.

I was hers.

**/=/=/=/=/**

Ten minutes later, Bella's fingertips were pruned, her skin puckered from the water. I left to give her privacy while she dressed, but I waited outside her door—at her insistence. My guess was that she thought the same as last night—that I'd go into my room and lock the door, to be away from her.

Little did she know . . .

"She's out?" Jasper approached the bathroom.

I jerked a thumb behind myself. "She's putting pajamas on."

Jasper knocked lightly. "Bells?"

"Yeah...?" she asked, and her door was awkwardly closed since I'd broken it before.

"Gotta fix this thing." Jasper stared at it.

I wasn't sorry for breaking it, so I didn't comment. I'll fix it when I get back, if he doesn't.

"Hey...you wanna camp out in the living room?" he asked her. "There's ice cream. We'll get the sleeping bags and—"

Bella opened her door with a fake smile for her brother. "I'm okay."

"Bella—" He started.

She hugged him. "I'm fine. Really. I swear."

"But..." Jasper dropped his shoulders.

"You have to get up early. You should go to bed," she told him.

He shook his head. "We need to talk—"

"Today—today was a fluke," she lied. "I swear it."

Jasper didn't believe her.

He stared down at her; she averted her gaze.

And my heart broke for the both of them.

My friend had tears in his eyes. "I'd hope...that if this wasn't a fluke, as you said, that you would have told me."

"Jasper—"

"Stop lying to me." He put his hand up, wiping his eyes with the other. "The lying stops now. I don't want you to lie to me. When you're ready, just know...know I'll listen." His voice broke.

Bella was in tears again. "You don't understand—"

"Then, help me, Bella. Help me understand," he pleaded.

Quietly, I backed away from them, wanting to give them privacy.

Bella noticed. "No! Please, don't."

I stopped in my tracks.

Jasper was angry now, staring at me. "But you'll talk to him."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "But nothing—"

"Nothing happened. I know." He nodded, tone condescending. "Good. Talk to Edward. Just fucking talk. Please."

"Relax." I squeezed his shoulder. "I think we should all...get some sleep."

Jasper nodded, leaning away to kiss Bella's hair before he silently entered his bedroom.

"Oh..." She rang her hands, about to break down, frantic. "Now he's—"

"He's _not_ mad at you." I shook my head. "Give him time. You both need time. Okay? Don't get upset. He'll be fine."

Bella didn't say anything, went back into her bedroom.

In her cute PJs, she smiled up at me before grabbing a stuffed animal.

I sucked my teeth, tossing it back onto her bed. "I'll be your teddy bear."

"Thank you." Her lip quivered. "Oww, it hurts when I do that." She reached for her mouth. "I just don't want him sad. It hurts me...when Jasper's sad. I can't. I hate that he'll feel bad, and it's embarrassing."

"He loves you," I said. "He wants to be here for you. He _wants_ to be your shoulder, a shoulder for you to cry on. Most of all, Jasper just wants you to be straight with him." I shrugged. "It's not a burden. He knows you're hurting."

"I don't want him sad," she whispered. "That's the last thing in the world I want. _He_ can't be hurt."

I wiggled my fingers, wanting her tiny hand. "Come on, baby. Let's go to bed."

She nestled into my side as we walked to my bedroom.


	45. Chapter 45

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Forty-Five**

**_W_**hen Riley called my cell, I jumped to grab it, hoping I'd get to it before it woke up Bella.

No dice.

She stirred and yawned, her eyelids fluttering open while I answered the phone.

_"Yo!"_ he said.

"What's up?" I cleared my throat.

_"I'll be by your crib in thirty. Be ready."_

"All right." The night before I was instructed to bring a change of clothes, maybe a bar of soap if I was inclined.

Ending the call, I turned to Bella. "You gonna be okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah…I think so."

I narrowed my eyes, studying her.

"Honest, Edward, I feel better already."

"Good." I kept my tone hushed. "You call me if you need anything—if anything comes up. Even if you just wanna say hi. Okay?"

"I will," she promised.

I touched her chin with my knuckle before I went to the bathroom.

After a quick shower and getting dressed, I grabbed my toothbrush and another pair of jeans and a shirt to throw into a shopping bag.

Seeing as Jake's nine was fully loaded, I threw that shit into the bag, too, keeping mine at my waist and placing the silencer in my pocket.

Bella watched me as I moved about the room.

"What?" I asked.

She shook her head, a shy grin on her face. "Nothing…I have a knapsack you can borrow. It's in the coat closet."

I nodded. "Thanks…I should go wait downstairs."

"Oh…I didn't set the pot." She went to get up.

"It's okay," I laughed, stopping her. "I'll see you in a few days."

She fisted my shirt. "Please, be careful."

"I promise," I said, bending to place a kiss on her forehead and again in her hair. And I hope she doesn't mind, since it's been a challenge to keep my lips to myself. "I'll call you."

Bella made to get up, but I stopped her once more.

"Just stay in here." I threw the blanket over her head.

"Edward!" She slapped it away, a smile in her tone.

"I gotta make sure you don't get away." I chuckled.

She giggled as I proceeded to tuck her back in—making sure she couldn't escape.

"You're all set," I whispered. "You're a Bella Burrito."

She beamed at me.

And I . . . I smiled back, finally feeling warm inside, like I was home, like I finally had a home . . . a place in this world.

Maybe that's why I had to come back? Maybe I was meant to take care of Bella? Be with Bella?

I used to be jealous of all the guys in my unit who had girls waiting for them at home...

Who knew I had one all along?

I wasn't sure, but that's what it felt like.

And it felt so good to be here…at her side.

I fucking hated to leave.

_Of all times..._

But everything was going to be okay . . . _in_ time.

"Be good." I pushed her hair away from her face. "You got nothing to worry about. You hear me?"

Even in the dim light, I saw the color leave her face. "Okay." She rasped. "Good."

"Hmm?" I hummed, staring at her.

"I'm fine." She nodded. "You got to, to him first? You, um, you killed him?" she whispered.

I hated that I couldn't tell her, verbally confirm. "You have nothing to worry about. You'll _never_ see Jake again."

"Good." If she was hiding, wearing a brave mask, I couldn't tell. Her face remained stoic while I waited for tears, shock, or…maybe a smile.

"Never again," I repeated.

Bella let out a slow breath, tears welling up in her eyes. "I-I'm free." She said it so low, I didn't catch it.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Nothing." She squeezed my hand. "Go…you shouldn't keep Riley waiting."

I didn't want to fucking leave, but I heaved myself off the bed. "You call me."

"I will." She wiped her eyes. "Thank you. Edward, I—" She reached for me.

I sat down next to her again. "Talk to me."

Her eyes trailed away from me. "I'll be fine. I promise."

"Okay." With one final kiss to her cheek, I left the bedroom to switch bags before leaving the house . . .

Bella neglected to tell me that her backpack was purple, but I used it anyway.

True to his word, Riley pulled up to the curb, and I hopped into his whip.

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	46. Chapter 46

**NOTE: Bella's mind is obviously a jumbled mess, having gone through something traumatic. Also, her chapters will be longer since we don't hear from her as often.**

**"Tribute"**

**Chapter Forty-Six**

**Bella POV**

"Bella?" Jasper whispered, nudging my shoulder.

I turned to face him, still entangled in the blanket, still in Edward's bed. "Hey."

Last night, I knew I'd be better in the morning. After all, it wasn't like I hadn't been through shit with Jake before.

It's different this time, though.

Jasper knew of a few things . . . Edward had found me, and I told him a lot, more than I ever told anyone.

I never told anyone anything.

_Embarrassed._

That's how I felt this morning, although I was still confused—my head slightly achy. My eyes felt like they were swollen from my tears. My shoulder was burning where Jake had bitten me, and my bottom lip was tight from where I was cut.

Stiff, my body was stiff.

My insides were...calm.

It was over . . .

It's all over.

From what Edward had said, I gathered Jake was dead.

_Relieved._

When Edward told me, relief washed over me.

The invisible shackles Jake had placed on me disappeared.

I was free.

After Edward left, I cried until I fell back to sleep.

My tears were a mix of sorrow because he was leaving, and joy because . . .

I was free.

_Free._

"How you feeling?" Jasper asked, concern etched on his face. "I got you more Tylenol—in case you still got a headache." He placed the medicine and a glass of water down next to the bed.

"I'm okay." It wasn't a lie. I was all right.

Again, I kept reminding myself that it could have been a lot worse.

_And that's all over now._

"I'm staying home today—"

"Jazz—" I sat up, trying to get out of the cocoon Edward wrapped me in "—you don't have to. You can't miss school, and who's going to work at Sal's?"

He shrugged. "Doesn't matter." He placed the pills in my hand. "Take them anyway."

To humor him, I tossed the Tylenol back and washed them down with the water.

"You scared me, Bells." Seeing my big brother so sad almost had me in tears again. "You gotta…I don't know."

"It's not your fault. How many times did you tell me Jake was no good?" My stomach rolled, knotting up, but I had to be brave.

I had to get through this conversation, maybe smile a little, tell him how great I feel this morning, lie to him . . . to shield him from the truth.

Jasper couldn't know. He'd blame himself, he'd hate himself.

Knowing how that feels, I didn't want that for him, not at all.

"Exactly…And I don't say shit to be a prick. I'll always look out for you." He started to pace. "And I know you…If I would have pushed—when shit with Jake was gravy, before Eddie came back—you would have taken off with the sonofabitch."

That would have never been _my_ choice.

If Jasper caused trouble, Jake would have taken me away from him, or hurt him...my brother.

This is what he doesn't understand.

_Christ._

I just didn't know anymore, wanting to keep it all a secret, keep it from Jasper.

He'll blame himself.

"You would'a moved in with Jake, and then . . ."

I didn't say anything.

He continued. "I'm putting my foot down now, though. I do shit—say shit for your best interest."

"Thank you," I whispered. "I'm sorry...if I ever gave you a hard time."

"Can you listen to me then, from now on?" He nudged me, and I moved over so he could sit.

"Well…I don't know." I had a feeling he was gonna ask me to stay away from Edward.

He snorted. "Seriously, B . . . What happened yesterday?"

I shook my head, truly not wanting to lie. "Please?"

"But you told Edward."

I didn't reply.

If it was up to me, Edward wouldn't know either, but he found me—helped me more than he'll ever know. It felt good to a certain extent to confide in him. Now I just fear that he'll see me as dirty, used, gross.

"What's the deal with you guys anyway?"

"I don't know." I was honest. "He's—a good guy." I nodded. "A friend, I guess."

"No, he's _my_ friend. You know what I mean." He scoffed.

"He's my friend, too . . ." I grinned. "I don't know. You wanna know if I like him? Yeah, I like him so much . . . it's weird. You know I've always crushed on him." And yesterday didn't change that. I had a feeling nothing would change that. Edward is amazing.

"I do—" he pursed his lips "—which was the reason I tried to, tried to keep you two apart. I knew there'd be trouble. But I'm gonna say this." He turned to hold my biceps. "You don't need a new boyfriend yet. You don't need another fucker breathing down your neck. Bells, you're a kid—"

"Jasper—"

"You're not even a person yet," he exclaimed, wearing a smile. "Gram babied you, and when she died…you swore you were grown—jumping into shit with Jake." He shrugged. "You have no idea what you want. Don't focus all your time on boys, partying—Edward. You want a job? Get one. In October, you'll start school. You'll even make new friends…I just—" He kept his mouth open but stopped talking while sadness filled my heart again.

And it wasn't because he brought up my grandmother.

It wasn't because he pretty much called me a baby, said I was immature.

It had nothing to do with Jake.

"Don't make me stay away from Edward." If only he knew it was likely physically impossible for me.

If I _wanted_ Edward before, I _needed_ him now.

"Out of everything I just said, you—"

"Please," I whispered.

Jasper sighed and then silence filled the room for a few seconds. "You won't talk to me, so I don't know how to help you," he paused, "but Edward can't…he can't be your crutch. You have shit to overcome. That needs to come from you." He poked my nose.

"I—" I didn't know how to answer him.

There was no hiding the way I felt yesterday—after what happened—from anyone. Shaken up, distraught or in shock, I didn't have a handle on my emotions.

And Edward made everything just a little bit better.

Even now, just the thought of him . . .

"Edward isn't a magician, Bella." He groaned. "What I mean is…you have to deal with what happened. Not hide behind Edward."

I nodded, mulling that over in my head.

What he said didn't change anything, not at all.

"I'll tell you the same thing I told him. Just be straight with me. Okay?" He didn't look happy about it. "Eddie's head is just as fucked as yours. He doesn't know if he's coming or going, or—"

"You think he's gonna leave?" I asked.

"I didn't say that." He shook his head.

"You think he's lost, too?" I felt that way, thinking Edward lost when he first got here. "You don't think he's gonna stay?" My teeth gnashed together, my body stiffened with a cringe, and I was suddenly nervous, but I think my body was preparing itself for the blow. The disappointing news...

"This is about you, not Edward."

"Sorry," I mumbled, my mind a jumbled mess.

He rolled his eyes. "I've been so busy…Edward and I haven't talk-talked in a few, besides speaking and worrying about you. I really don't know what's up with him," he said. "I don't think he's ready to…be in a relationship. I don't think that's what he wants."

"Oh." I couldn't help but frown, hearing that.

Having been through this before, feeling safe again, given the time to calm down—

Edward is still at the forefront of my mind.

My head is a mess, though. I agreed with Jasper there.

It was just upsetting to hear him say that Edward wouldn't be interested in a relationship.

I know I'll need time. That I do need time, but Edward makes me forget. He makes me feel better, gives me hope, and a reason to smile.

I knew what Jasper was saying . . .

Before I can make someone else happy, I have to make myself happy first?

I didn't know how to do that.

Having Edward by my side made me feel stronger.

My brother doesn't know if Edward is going to stay.

But I had to be better for the both of them—Jasper and Edward, and maybe things won't have to change?

I cringed again, hoping to relax, hoping my brother didn't notice.

_Will I ever be able to pick one thought—one emotion—and stick with it?_

The air was suddenly thick. It was hard to breathe, but I_ could_ breathe…taking slow yet deep breaths. I hoped my face wasn't red.

"B, what's wrong?"

I gasped. "Nothing." I shook my head, feeling the panic crawl up my neck, like it was on my skin.

"Easy." Jasper rubbed my back. "Drink some water."

I nodded, taking the glass from him before I gulped it all down.

I was winded when it was emptied.

"Feel better?"

"Yeah," I sighed, licking my lips. "You-you think Edward might leave?" I tried to think back to the last thing Jasper had said. "Um—" I didn't know if I felt better, still confused. "Uh…" I rolled my eyes, faking a smile. "What'd you say?"

Jasper kissed my temple, leaning his head on mine. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

He squeezed me to his side. "You're going to be okay."

"I know," I whispered, hoping I would be.

"Edward," Jasper sighed. "He has ties here, but not many strong ones…I don't wanna see you get hurt again." He placed his arm over my shoulders. "You don't need a boyfriend right now anyway . . . I mean, if shit _does_ work out for you guys…good."

"Thanks," I said, glad he'd be okay if Edward and I were to get together.

"It looks like Edward's getting into other things you might not want any part of."

"You can't be mad at him." I started crying and hated myself for it.

Jazz sucked his teeth, squeezed me to him again. "Please, Bella. I can't—it hurts to see you like this. Talk to me."

I turned my whole body to face him. "Don't be mad at Edward. Promise me. He's amazing, Jasper. He—I can't explain it."

If I told Jasper about everything Edward had done for me, I'd have to get into it...tell my brother the truth behind what happened, what has happened.

And his prior reaction is the reason I can't confide in him.

"I'm not mad at Edward." He seemed frustrated with me.

"I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?" He was exasperated.

I shrugged.

He stared at me for a moment, but relaxed some—I saw it in his shoulders when they dropped. "I love Edward—as if he was my brother. You know? But you _are_ my sister. I'll take your side in the divorce." He wiggled his brows, suddenly playful.

I giggle-snorted, pushing him away. "Go on."

"It's late," he said. "It's ten past eleven. You should hit up the avenue. Carvel has a help wanted sign in the window . . ."

I grimaced. "Like this?" I pointed to my face, which was crap. I knew how to hide it all with makeup.

I just didn't want a job…

I didn't want to get out of bed either. I'd be content to stay here, sleep the days away until Edward came back.

It's not logical…I can't do that.

But Carvel…?

Working at the club would have been cool. It was going to be a couple of days a week, and it's a nightclub.

Truth be told, when I graduated from high school, I just didn't have any ambition or ideas as to what I wanted to do, besides hair—to be a stylist—but I didn't give a shit about the future.

Never thought I'd have one, I guess.

Regardless, it seems I'm still lacking drive.

The thought of leaving the house was almost unbearable.

Jasper grinned. "Carvel isn't that bad. You love ice cream. I dunno . . . No pressure. Take a few days, relax. You know? Get your head together. I just mentioned it—thought you could apply before they hired someone else."

"Okay."

"You also have visitors."

"What?" I glanced around. "Oh, you didn't tell Alice—"

"I didn't say a word," he whispered. "I swear. Alice and Rosalie just showed up."

I felt my lip with my fingertip and winced. "Tell them I'm sick."

"Too late, bitch!" Alice jumped into the room.

I groaned, covering my face with a pillow.

"Can you give us a sec?" Jazz asked her.

"That's what you said ten minutes ago!" Alice complained.

My brother shot up, kicking her out of the room to close the door.

"Not cool!" Alice shouted.

Jasper looked to me. "You want them gone? Just say the word."

"It's okay." I scooted off the bed.

There was no hiding what happened. If I stay holed up, they'd know . . . something was up, they'd possibly tell others.

Worst than Jasper knowing is the whole neighborhood learning I was Jake's punching bag.

I had to face Alice and Rosalie.

"Just one thing—before you go." He put his arms out, and I welcomed his embrace. "Don't scare me like that again. Okay?"

I nodded, resting my head on his chest.

"Did—did he—um—"

"No," I lied, steeling my nerves, my eyes meeting his so he'd believe me. "It wasn't like that. He got angry—hit me. That's it."

Besides trying not to think about it—at which I'm failing miserably—I still didn't want my brother to be upset, learn the truth.

Jasper nodded and he looked pissed. "Has this—"

"Never happened before. I swear." I rushed out.

Jasper stared at me.

"It's true." I kept eye contact with him, trying my hardest, willing him to believe me. "I'm not lying. Yesterday was a fluke."

He nodded. "All right…Do you need a doctor?"

"That's a waste of money."

His face fell. "It doesn't matter. If you need to go, I'll_ get_ the money."

"I'm fine," I promised. "Okay?"

He blew out a breath. "I'll be downstairs."

I grabbed his hand. "Go to Sal's. I'm cool. Keep an eye on it."

"Sure." He kissed my hair and then left the bedroom.

When the door opened, Alice and Rosalie entered.

"This is Edward's room?" Rose looked around, quirking a brow. "There's nothing in here."

Alice gasped. "My baby!" She palmed my cheeks. "Did you ice it?"

"Jasper made sure—he had me icing my face all afternoon yesterday."

She frowned. "Okay."

"Friend or not, Emmett's looking for Jake." Rosalie nodded, sitting on Edward's bed. "Em's gonna fuck him up."

"CJ, too." Alice nodded. "Where's Edward?"

"Oh…he went to see his mom." I shrugged. "Um…" It seemed they already knew something.

"What happened?" Alice asked. "Did Jake…suspect something? About you and Edward? I swear. I didn't see him when I left. If I did—Bella, I would have never let him in."

"I know." I nodded.

"What, uh, did he do?" She glanced up at me.

"Alice!" Rosalie shouted. "Maybe she doesn't wanna talk about it."

"I don't," I said, biting my cuticle. "Jake and me—we fought. That's it. There's no story to tell."

"Such an asshole," Rose muttered. "He deserves a knee to his balls. I hope I can make that happen." She gave Alice a high-five.

I grinned, hoping I looked genuine.

Alice smiled at me. "Margaritas by the pool? My mom's out shopping, but Dad's home. You know he don't care." She snorted. "Mom's a total narc with the booze, but it's okay for her to drink herself into oblivion," she rambled.

Rosalie combed through her hair with her fingers. "I'm in the mood for a mojito."

I smiled, albeit briefly. "I just wanna stay home."

"You're safe with us, chicka!" Alice placed her arm over my shoulders. "We'll be at my house, and Jake's not that stupid…to seek you there."

"But your mom and dad—possibly seeing this?" I pointed to my face, using it as an excuse again. "I'm tired…I—" Leaving my house was the last thing I wanted to do.

"You can wear sunglasses, put some cover up on." Alice waved a hand. "You can't hide."

"Leave her alone," Rose said, nudging Alice. "Maybe—"

I didn't like the way Rose looked at me. "I'm fine. More than okay…I'll meet you guys downstairs. I wanna shower quick."

Alice squeezed me before she left, and Rosalie—always a bit cold—just left.

Once they were gone, I breathed a sigh of relief, getting back into Edward's bed.

I inhaled the scent of his pillow, instantly missing him—his face—and I didn't want to leave his bed. More than that, I didn't want to leave the house, but I had to act normal, be normal.

I had to smile . . .

And I had to put everything that happened yesterday behind me.

But how…?

How do I forget?

It was weird, trying to think back to last month or last year. So much had changed within such a short period of time, and I didn't want to think about my life—a life without Edward Masino in it.

I groaned, leaving the bed.

My thoughts always seem to go back to Edward, and I hated to admit that…thinking of him was better than…dwelling on…other things.

_Normal._

_Smile._

Edward…He may not have been a star in many of my yesterdays, but he'll be around for plenty of tomorrows.

And that…

That was something to smile about.

I'll get through today.

I'll get through tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that—even if I have to count down the hours, the minutes, the fucking seconds—until Edward came back . . . until I could smile and mean it.

I'll get through it…like I always do.

And Edward _was_ coming back.

After showering, I did my best to cover the bruises on my face, I gave myself another pep talk...

Nevertheless, I was dressed and ready to go within twenty minutes.

I borrowed one of Edward's t-shirts to wear, which would be a secret and silent reminder. It'll remind me of better tomorrows. A symbol of hope.

Walking downstairs, I saw Rosalie through the screen, sitting on the stoop, but I hadn't seen Alice.

That was because she was in the kitchen sucking Jasper's face.

I hid in the hall, spying on them, because . . . seeing Jasper and Alice together was odd enough.

But seeing my brother with a woman . . . I'd never seen that before, except for when he was in high school. He had a lot of girlfriends back then.

Jazz hasn't gotten much play since he became my parent . . . Then again, I always figured he got his kicks elsewhere.

"Will I see you later?" Alice asked, smiling the widest I'd ever seen.

Jasper had a straight face. "Keep an eye on Bella. If she seems off, you lemme know, and I'll go pick her up."

"She's stronger than you think," Alice crooned, getting on her toes to peck his lips. "My girl's tough. Trust. She can also knock with the best of 'em. I've seen your sister kick ass—"

"Those are cat fights." He pushed his hair back. "And yeah, she'll act tough…smile for me, you, and Rose, but—"

"Jazzy—" She held his hand. "Trust me. She'll be fine."

He nodded, looking away from her.

"Jasper?" She was getting on my brother's nerves. That much was evident. "Can we hang out later?"

"I gotta work—study later. We'll see."

"That means no." She pouted.

"It means we'll play it by ear." He pried his hand out of hers.

"I'm ready," I announced, before she could ruin the progress she'd made.

Their sharing kisses days after their hookup was a feat and a half. They'd definitely make a cute couple. Maybe she'd even lighten Jasper up a little, since he's usually so serious while she's playful.

We'd need to have a talk about her . . . eagerness, her always being available to him.

For the record, I can dish decent advice every once in a while, even if I'd done the exact opposite with Edward—throwing myself at him like some whore.

But I couldn't help it.

That was what he wanted. That was what he was looking for when he went out with Lauren and Jessica, and I was grasping at straws that night . . . until I just couldn't help myself, and I literally threw myself at him.

Though, I don't regret anything that happened between us. It was natural. It was beautiful. It was us, Edward and me. It was a night of many firsts for me. I learned what true passion felt like. I felt pleasure for the first time. I made love for the first time.

I felt so many things...I think I confused my brain with all the different sensations. My body couldn't process the foreignness? And my heart took over. And all it could do was sing a happy song.

Anyway, when it comes to my brother and Alice, I shouldn't compare them to Edward and me. Jasper's different. If he feels smothered, he'll back off completely. Alice will blow it.

That got me thinking of Edward again, since he and Jasper can be alike.

Keeping my distance wasn't an option, so I hoped I could tone…myself down a little, put things in perspective before he gets home.

"Let's go," Alice said, leaving the house.

"What was that?" I asked Jasper.

He grinned, shaking his head. "Just go—have fun. You need anything, you call me. I'll come get you."

"Thanks." I waved, trailing after my girls.

/=/=/

Alice's driver—Jeremy—drove us the two blocks to her house. As usual, there were other cars in her driveway, other people at her house, but like always, the three of us marched into the backyard to hang out—otherwise ignoring the Colleoni associates.

"Why's Emmett here?" Rose whispered.

"He's here?" I hadn't seen him, yet my stomach rolled—nervous. Rose says Emmett wants to kick Jake's ass, but I highly doubted it. Emmett's seen Jake do some shady shit to me, and he's never said anything.

Rose gasped. "You think Jake is here?"

"No," I said.

Edward told me not to worry.

Jake was dead.

The idea filled me with glee.

Edward cared that much about me.

He avenged what Jake had done, and my only worries or concerns were for Edward.

Fuck Jake.

Alice came out with a drink tray. "See? My father doesn't care."

"Is Jake here?" Rose asked her.

Alice snorted. "If he even thinks about coming around here…" She chuckled, taking a seat and grabbing a margarita. "I'd shove a nine up his ass myself. Trust." She sipped her drink. "These are good. B, have one."

"Thanks." I took one off the tray.

"Marie just showed up. She has the baby." Alice squealed.

People coming and going—family and friends alike—all day long was nothing new for the Colleoni household.

I know I'm always welcome here.

Esme's the closest thing I have to a mom, while Marie is like the older sister I never had.

Rose gave Alice a nudge. "Is CJ here, too?" As she mentioned his name, she adjusted her bikini top.

"Stay away from him. Don't even look at him."

Rose had wide eyes.

"I'm dead-ass," Alice warned.

"He's married. I don't get down like that." Rose slammed Alice, but she didn't notice.

Alice guzzled her margarita. "You guys hungry?"

I shrugged, pushing my sunglasses up on my nose.

"B, if I ordered pizza—"

"Jazz manages. He doesn't deliver unless it's on the block," I laughed.

"Shit." She snapped her fingers. "I think there's ham. Who wants a ham sandwich?"

"I could eat," I said.

"Cool." Alice left the table.

Rosalie turned to me. "You don't think CJ's—"

"No." I was honest, having literally grown up with him. I didn't see him that way at all. "And he's your cousin—"

"Second cousin by marriage," she defended. "I just think he's good-looking. That's all." She had more issues than I cared to speak about. "And isn't Edward supposed to be like a pseudo brother to you? You're on his jock…now that's sick."

"No, it's not. We're not related at all…" I trailed off when I saw Emmett enter the yard.

"My monkey man." Rose smiled, only to give Emmett the cold shoulder when he sipped her drink.

"Ladies," he greeted, turning to Rose. "How long you gonna be mad at me?"

I leaned back, trying to blend into the chair.

"How long you plan on playing the field?" Rose leaned toward him. "We're getting too old for this garbage. Don't you think? You wanna be my man, then be my man." She shrugged. "Take me or leave me." I wished I had her balls to just outright say something like that to Edward.

"We never talked about being exclusive." He grabbed her hand. "If that's what you want—"

"That's what I want," she said.

"Okay, then. We good?" He landed a few loud kisses in her neck, making her squeal. Then his eyes landed on me. "How you doin'?"

"I'm fine," I said.

"Jake's gotta be hiding out." He nodded. "We were supposed to meet up yesterday, and he never showed."

"Oh…" I studied my nail beds, wishing I had the money to get a manicure.

"If I talk to him . . . I mean, I know CJ and Jasper must be pissed—probably won't let you speak to him."

I shook my head. "I have nothing to say."

"Come on, B," he drawled, squeezing my shoulder. "My boy got upset, but you were wrong—so fucking wrong, too."

"Would'ju shut the fuck up?" Rosalie barked at him. "Did you see what he did to her?" She reached for me—my shades—and I cringed back.

It was too late, though. She tore off my disguise.

"What could she have possibly done to deserve that?" she asked.

I wondered if my makeup came off or something.

"I don't see anything." Emmett refused to look at me. "All I know is it's gonna be this huge clusterfuck. Jake'll get killed—"

"And he deserves it!" Rosalie nodded, handing me back my shades. "If he's smart, he won't come back to the neighborhood."

"She was throwing herself at another dude!" he exclaimed. "I'd fuckin' lose my mind, too. I'm sorry. Bella carried herself like—"

"Like what?" I whispered, refusing to cry. The time to be strong was now, right fucking now. Anger bubbled up inside of me, and I needed to hold onto it, go with it and stand my ground. "Um, like what? How did I act?" I swallowed my nerves, lifting my chin and sitting up, wanting to look taller when I felt so small.

Emmett clammed up.

"Answer her." Our heads whipped to CJ. He had Bianca, his daughter, in his arms, and she was crying. "Finish what you were gonna say." He sat with us.

Bianca's wails and whimpering didn't seem to bother him, but it irked me. CJ was letting her cry, too engrossed in what Emmett was going on about. He was talking about me, and all I could focus on was the baby crying.

Emmett sighed. "Bella did my boy dirty—"

"I didn't." I shook my head. Calling Jasper to come get me sounded like a good idea. Yet my attention went to Bianca again. "Don't cry…" I touched her little hand with my finger.

"Look, all I know is…you broads demand respect when you walk around…actin' like pigs, dressing like you belong on a street corner," Emmett laughed. "You think you're golden with Edward?" he asked me.

I didn't know what to say.

"He's the same way—will think the same way. Watch." Emmett nodded.

"Edward's nothing like Jake." Tears welled up in my eyes, and I pinched my thigh. I couldn't cry here.

"Watch..." Emmett sounded cryptic, still nodding his head. "Carry yourself like a ho, and men'll treat you like one."

"Oh!" CJ shouted. "Watch _yourself_, McCarty."

Emmett didn't reply, sipping from Rose's glass. But I understood what he was saying. It made perfect sense. If I want Edward to take me seriously, I had to change. I knew I couldn't be the mess he was with last night. I can't be...me, whatever I am.

I needed to tone myself down.

I needed to...be normal.

I needed to do something...maybe earn his respect somehow.

"My boy Ed's not here." CJ smiled. "So keep his name out ya mouth. Understand?" He turned and thrust the baby into my arms. "Make her stop crying."

I held his daughter awkwardly until I righted her, and she was this tiny little thing . . . this warm bundle of joy. Having her in my arms made me smile a real smile for the first time all day.

"But right now, Em…I need you to bounce. You're getting me heated, and I don't need it." CJ stared Emmett down.

Emmett stood up, showing us his palms. "I'm out. If I see Jake—"

"You'll do and say nothing," CJ said. "And when you see my boy Edward? You'll respect him as if he's me."

"I got no beef with him," Emmett snorted. "Later." He backed away until he was at the fence.

"You all right?" CJ asked me.

"Yeah." I cleared my throat.

"Don't listen to that asshole." He massaged my shoulder. "You're a beautiful young woman...you should be treated as such. You're not...what he said."

"Thanks." I didn't know what to say to that. I've never taken compliments well, although I was sure he only said that to make me feel better.

"You sure you're good?" CJ touched my cheek.

"Yes." I nodded. "I'm fine."

"You sure?" He smirked, pushing my hair behind my ear. "Want me to go beat his ass?"

"No." I rolled my eyes.

He thumbed my cheek. "Smile for me."

CJ was starting to annoy me, so I turned to grin in his direction. At the same time, Bianca got a good grip on my finger. That made me giggle.

"Thanks." He winked, heaving himself out of his chair.

"She's strong. Huh?" I asked.

CJ nodded. "You gonna drink this?" He went for my margarita.

"No...go 'head," I said.

Rose kicked me under the table, which made my head snap to her. She brought her shades down to stare at me wide-eyed.

"What?" I mouthed.

She sighed, sitting back in her chair.

When Bianca got fussy again, I left the chair to rock her. She quieted right away, like she always does with me. I have no idea what it is. Maybe she likes me?

And that made me feel like a million bucks.

Holding her was the highlight of my day.

"She can't be hungry—was suckin' on Marie's tit just a little while ago." He kissed her hair.

I tried not to giggle. "She's okay."

"Ugh." When I heard Marie groan, I turned to her. "You can't hold her for ten minutes?" she asked CJ.

He widened his arms. "She likes Bella—she shut right up. What you want me to do?"

Marie smiled at me. "You want me to take her?"

"I'm okay," I whispered, swaying from side to side, because Bianca was falling asleep.

"All right." Marie's voice was hushed. "Just try and stay in the shade. I'm gonna get a head start on dinner."

"How 'bout I help you wit' that?" CJ asked. "Since I'm so useless?"

"You said it." Marie snorted.

Tensions seemed high with the couple, but then they disappeared back into the house. At the same time, Alice came out with a plate of sandwiches.

"Oh, my niece-y-poo." She shot me a toothy grin. "You can eat. I'll hold her."

I paused, not wanting to give her up. "Are you sure?"

"Of course. I'm her godmother."

"Okay." I gently placed her in Alice's arms, and then Bianca started screaming.

**Thank you for reading.**

**Are you guys still reading? LOL.**

**:-)**


	47. Chapter 47

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**"Tribute"**

**Chapter Forty-Seven**

Riley took the first shift driving.

We were in this beat-up Camry. It'd be a surprise if we got down there without it breaking down.

He finally stopped when we got to North Carolina, after him driving over eight hours straight. Riley must be used to these runs, but I had to piss like a motherfucker.

It was hot as fuck, too.

Sticky, feeling gross, I bought a soda and a Slim Jim at the rest area.

Riley got a cup of coffee. "How you doin', hun?" He winked at some chick pumping gas.

The blonde waved with her free hand, checking us out.

"Oh…the broads on the road are the best," he commented, entering the car.

"Did you want me to drive?" I offered.

"Nah…I'm flying."

"Flying?" I asked.

"Just rest up. We'll be there before you know it." He patted my back.

Content with that . . . I mean, I could sleep anywhere, literally, so I got comfortable and closed my eyes.

No matter what, I couldn't fall asleep, my mind wandering back to Bella—hoping she'd be all right in the long run.

I knew I did the right thing.

That's what I kept telling myself.

I must have fallen asleep somewhere between the Carolinas. When I woke up, we were somewhere in Georgia, and it was dark.

"I'm starving…Let's go eat."

I sat up and stretched, taking a look around. We were parked at a steakhouse.

"There's a bar…I'mma get a drink. You gotta drive the rest."

"Okay," I said, leaving the car.

After a quick bite, we both went to the bathroom again. Over by the car, Riley used his cell to call who I believed to be his wife.

I took the opportunity to call Jasper's crib.

_"Hello?"_ Bella picked up, sounding frantic on the second ring, winded like she'd ran for it.

"Hey," I said, smiling wide.

_"Hi,"_ she sighed, and we both became quiet.

I cleared my throat. "How you doin'?"

_"I'm okay. I went to Alice's before . . . we hung out in her backyard."_

"Cool." I nodded. "I was just calling to say hello."

_"Right."_ She sounded good, happy. _"Call me tomorrow?"_

"You got it." I smiled, ending the call.

Then I winced, wishing I'd sent my best to Jazz or some shit.

_Oh well._

We entered the Camry, this time with me driving, and I quickly drove back onto the highway.

I wanted to get back to Brooklyn as soon as possible.

**Thank you for reading.. **


	48. Chapter 48

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**"Tribute"**

**Chapter Forty-Eight**

**_W_**hen we finally arrived to the outskirts of Tampa, we got a motel room where we cleaned up, rested up for a bit, and got something to eat. We actually watched some TV, had a few beers, and I wondered what we were doing next.

I truly wanted to get back to Brooklyn as soon as possible. However, we weren't meeting these guys for quite a few hours.

I thought we were late, because of what I had to handle before we left New York. But with changing plans, we had to comply with their schedules . . . whatever.

Bored, I flipped through the channels.

"There's a bar across the lot. I'mma go check it out." Riley put his boots back on.

Content to lie in the bed, I hoped he'd have a good time.

When he was gone, I called Bella again. This time, I spoke to Jasper, too, and he assured me that everything was cool by them.

It made me smile, actually having people to care for, even if that meant I'd worry about them as well.

I dozed off, likely with a smile on, only to be startled awake.

Riley came back to the room with some broad. They were making out; laughing when the redhead pushed him onto the full-sized bed next to the one I occupied.

_Did they not see me?_

Guess not.

My presence didn't stop Ginger from taking her top off.

"O-kay…" I already had my shoes on, and I went to leave.

Riley turned to face me. "Dude…it's cool. You can stay." He reached back for her bra.

I furrowed my brow, grabbing for my bag.

"Who's this?" Ginger faced me, her tits hanging out now.

Riley had some class, cupped her breasts with his hands. "That's my buddy," he answered her.

She waved, giggling and turning her attention back to Riley.

"You cool?" he asked me.

"Yeah…" Talk about uncomfortable. "I'll go get a beer."

As I walked across the lot, I took in the scenery. It was country, which was nothing new to me.

Without another thought, I entered the bar and ordered a beer.

I guzzled it back while I ate peanuts and watched a baseball game.

I wasn't there long—maybe an hour tops—when Riley came by looking for me.

"You ready?" he asked.

"You're _done_?" I almost laughed.

"We gotta go," he said.

I dug a few bills out and then left the bar.

"What's up?" I watched as he rapidly entered the Camry.

"That broad—her husband came looking for her."

"Hey, Yankee!" This buck-toothed hick came at us with a shotgun.

"Fuck!" I jumped into the car. "Fucking drive!"

Riley laughed his ass off, speeding away from the motel.

"What the fuck?" I laughed, looking back to the dude. He was just staring at us, his form getting smaller and smaller as the seconds ticked by.

"I don't know, bro. We were talking—she's feelin' me. I think I'mma get it in…you saw."

"Right." I nodded.

"Then that motherfucker comes bangin' on the door. He must'a seen us leave the bar."

"Shit." I shook my head.

"It's cool." He composed himself. "Lemme see if the truck's ready." He placed his phone to his ear.

We had to drive around for another twenty minutes before we could go to the location.

When we were through wasting time, we veered onto this dirt road.

These hillbilly motherfuckers were still loading the truck with wooden crates when we rolled up.

Riley did all the talking, and I did what I apparently do best.

I stood there—as Riley instructed—looking menacing.

And nothing happened.

The shit in the truck was squared away. The order was correct and Riley paid the man.

"Follow me," he instructed.

I nodded, sitting in the Camry.

Riley drove the truck to a crusher, where I abandoned the Toyota.

From there, we started back for New York.


	49. Chapter 49

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**"Tribute"**

**Chapter Forty-Nine**

**_T_**he ride up north was just as uneventful as the drive south. We listened to music, stopped to eat and piss, and took turns driving. When we hit the Tri-State area, Riley took the wheel, and we passed Brooklyn and then Manhattan . . .

"Where we headed?"

He gave me a fleeting glance. "Now we meet Felix and get my money. He's in the Bronx."

"What's he need all these guns for?"

"A few crates are for him—to do whatever he wants with them. My guess? He's selling them. But, look, after we meet him, we got another stop in Westchester—meet this guy Willy."

I nodded. "Yeah."

"I don't know Willy . . . He's a friend of a friend…of a friend, but he offered mad cash. Keep your eyes open. We won't be stopping. We'll check shit out first."

"Okay."

The exchange with Felix took less than ten minutes. His guys unloaded some shit, Felix gave Riley a bag of cash, and then we were out—still going north.

"You carry yourself like…you're close to CJ—Carlisle Jr." I looked to him. "And he'd let you meet some dude you don't know for a few bucks? Seems risky." I did not like this at all.

"This guy's a dope dealer—Aro's friend. Oh, you don't know Aro." He waved a hand.

I shook my head no.

"Well, we don't gotta worry about Feds or nothin' like that. You can trust that much, but we could get ripped off—hijacked. Understand? It's a risk I take _every time_ I do this run. There's truck pirates and shit." He rolled his eyes. "Consider me Captain Jack…but we steal and sometimes what we steal gets stolen. And if we get robbed—" he whistled "—it's trouble for Aro. Not me," he laughed. "So, yeah…it's a risk, but one I'll take 'cause I took someone's word."

"I get it," I said.

"I just want my bed…know what I mean?"

I chuckled. "I do."

"Should be right up this road."

It was a dirt path and desolate—not a house or car in sight.

Since I'd had my sports gloves on for a while already, all I had to do was grasp the nine and the .357, keeping my hands low.

"Good boy," Riley commented, holding his heat, as we pulled up to a black dude in a baseball cap. "You Willy?"

He spit to his side. "Nah, I ain't Willy. Get out the truck." He pointed a pistol at us.

Riley stepped on the gas, peeled off.

And before I knew what was happening, I heard shots fired—being fired at us.

"That motherfucker!" he shouted, speeding away.

Looking in the rearview, that same guy was firing at us and he was flanked by two other men.

"Shoot them!" Riley shouted. "Before they take out our wheels. Then we're fucked!"

For some reason, I was smiling as I opened the window to sit on the door. It was a total fucking rush. I used the nine to shoot at them, getting one in the leg.

"Oh, shit!" Riley guffawed. "You got one!" He squeezed my foot. "Two points!"

Laughing, I fired a few more shots, aiming for who we thought was Willy. "Fuck." By now, we were too far for me to make contact with them.

Luckily, if I was too far, they were too far to hit us, too.

"Damn, dude!" Riley reached to massage my shoulder. "No fear—you just fuckin'. . .Damn!" He shook his head. "I have no words." He touched his chest. "To just hop out and fuckin' shoot…takes balls, my dude."

I took that as a compliment.

Though, thinking back, I _didn't_ think.

I just _did_ . . .

And _that_ was incredibly fucking stupid.

But . . . hey, for the past four years, if someone shot at me, I was gonna shoot back.

It's better them than me.

"I'm glad we didn't lose the load." Riley blew out a breath.

I nodded. "Yeah."

"That motherfucker." He groaned. "Now…was this a set up? I don't know."

"What happens now?" I asked.

He sighed. "I sit with Colleoni…he'll talk to Aro, and we'll see what's up."

"If you didn't know this Willy guy…" I didn't know how to continue. Like Riley said, it was very risky, but why even take the risk? That made no sense to me.

"This economy, bro…" He pursed his lips, staring out to the road ahead.

"You're a practicing lawyer." I raised a brow. "It just seems silly. You'd put your ass out there for…for what, exactly?"

He gave me a fleeting glance. "Felix just gave me half of my yearly salary…what I'll make at the firm. You feel me? For two days work…"

"And I'm only getting a few grand?" I asked.

He chuckled. "I'mma take care of you. Don't worry about that…This dude Willy was supposed to have, uh, that other half. I'm telling you. This economy is shit. You look at me like I'm big time…I'm up there, don't get me wrong, but I don't own a business. I have a mortgage, and CJ owns half the avenue. Well, Colleoni does—whatever. You'll learn who has what as time goes on. Shakin' people down doesn't interest me. Stealin'…that gets my blood pumping. Heistin', wheelin', and dealin' . . . but I won't sling drugs or rob the people in our 'hood. I leave that to others."

"Right." I wondered what kind of firearms we were hauling. Everything was in a box, a crate, and I honestly hadn't seen a thing.

"How 'bout twenty large, and I throw in a AK?"

I grinned. "Sounds reasonable." It really made no difference because I didn't even expect that much—twenty thousand. "Hold the AK for me."

"I can do that."

We shook on it.

When we'd made it back onto the thruway, I wiped Jake's nine clean and threw it onto the side of the road.

And that was the last piece of Jacob Black to be discarded.


	50. Chapter 50

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty**

**_F_**inally, we left the truck in Brownsville, Brooklyn before catching a ride back to Bensonhurst. Riley's boy drove us to the neighborhood.

Tired, feeing grungy and filthy, I couldn't believe it'd taken us less than forty-eight hours to do all that shit—the driving, the stopping, everything.

I'm in decent shape, but I was exhausted—both mentally and physically.

"Get some rest," Riley said. "Meet me at Gazebo at ten. You did good, kid."

I nodded, running up Jasper's stoop.

I knew he was at Sal's, so I didn't seek him out—desperately needing a shower, a shave, and my bed.

While I dug my keys out of my pocket, I was surprised when the door flew open.

Bella beamed at me. "You're home."

I smiled. "Yeah…"

To say it was awkward would be to put it mildly. I was ecstatic to see her, but I wasn't sure if I should hug her…kiss her, or…

I knew I wanted to do all of the above.

Even with her fading bruises, she was gorgeous—the perfect girl I left in my bed days prior.

"How are you?" I entered the house.

She stared at the floor. "I'm okay. You weren't gone that long."

It felt like ages since I'd seen her.

"It felt like an eternity." She frowned but smiled just as fast. "Um…"

I opened my hand for hers. "How you doin', for real?"

She let me hold her hand. "I'm okay."

"Good," I sighed, leaning my ass on the sofa.

"Are you hungry? There's leftovers." She walked toward the kitchen.

I followed her. "Leftovers?"

"BBQ at Alice's. I brought food home. There was so much."

"Sounds good." I put my bag down, going into the fridge for something to drink. I grabbed a soda and took a seat at the table while Bella flitted about, getting some food ready for me. "Did you have fun? At the BBQ?"

She nodded. "It was nice."

"Cool," I said, sipping my soda.

Her eyes found me again. "You're being weird."

"Am I?" I chuckled.

She looked to me shyly, and she was content to stare at me.

I gazed back at her for a long moment, but the beeping of the microwave broke us out of it.

"I didn't know when you'd be back…I kept making pots of fresh coffee."

I laughed. "You didn't have to do that."

It was the sweetest, most adorable—

No one had ever taken care of me this way, and it was nice—appreciated immensely.

"I wanted to." She brought me over some of her famous java. "Go 'head. Eat."

I smiled to myself as I got to chowing down. There was macaroni and cheese, a few ribs, and a cheeseburger, although there was no bun. Still, I was starving and it was delicious.

Bella refused to join me, but she was happy to watch me eat.

After wiping the BBQ sauce away from my hands and face, I sipped the coffee. "What's going on?" There was some odd vibe in the air. We were in the same room but acting like strangers? I didn't know.

"Nothing," she sighed.

Feeling uncomfortable, I brought my plate to the sink. It was baffling, as being around her had become as natural as breathing two days ago.

Now . . .

It seemed like she was okay. I don't now. Bella didn't have tears in her eyes, she wasn't frowning, and she'd smile when our eyes would meet.

_What was it…?_

Why did it feel so…weird? She said_ I_ was being weird, but…

I missed this girl like crazy, imagined her running into my arms and kissing me silly when I got back.

I mean, I knew that wasn't going to happen, but it was a cool daydream. You know?

The other day, I was so concerned about her, was scared for her, cared for her…and I was petrified, worried about her head—her mind, wondering how much emotional damage she had from her encounter with Jake.

Yet . . . Bella seemed just fine.

It didn't look like she needed me for a thing today.

"I'll wash it." Bella hopped up, going for the sink.

"I got it," I said, turning on the faucet.

"No." She grabbed the plate from me. "You must be tired. I'll clean up." Bella was suddenly frantic. I let her have the dish, and she was quick to get the sponge all soapy.

"I am." I nodded and blew out a large breath. "Thanks…I need a shower."

She waved at my retreating form.

After I washed up, I entered my room to get dressed. I still had my towel on when Bella knocked.

"What's up?" I poked my head out.

She snapped her fingers, wincing. "I thought maybe I'd catch'ya naked."

I laughed. "Bella-Boo." That was something she might have done last week. When she was overzealous . . . just_before_.

"Eddie Spaghetti," she giggled.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm gonna take a nap."

"Okay. I'll be…around." She backed away from the door.

The tension between us was beginning to make me feel off, upset. I knew it'd be best to sit and speak with her, but what would I say?

I couldn't ask her to stop doing something if I don't know what she's doing.

No, I knew what she was doing.

She wasn't throwing herself at me or flirting, and that was upsetting. In hindsight, I didn't expect Bella to bounce back, no matter what I did to Jake, but I didn't expect her to do a 180, change so fast.

After putting some boxers and an undershirt on, I set my alarm clock for 7:30 p.m. before diving for my bed.

Not ten minutes later, I felt the mattress dip beside me.

I smiled, turning over to gather Bella into my arms. "Hi."

"Hey." She buried her head into my chest, getting comfortable.

And for some reason . . .

We morphed back into the people we were the other day . . . sort of.


	51. Chapter 51

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-One**

**_L_**ater that night, I headed to Gazebo with Jasper. He wanted to have a drink, and he was more than welcome to tag along.

When we left, Bella and Alice were busy painting each other's toes in the living room.

Maybe that's why Jasper wanted to come, so he'd have an excuse not to chill with Alice.

"You came out to get away from shorty?" I asked him, sipping my scotch.

He winced, guzzling his rum and Coke. The soda must have gone to his head. His eyes watered before he let out a belch. "She's everywhere."

I chuckled, knowing I could say the same about Bella.

And I'd only been home a few hours.

It's not like I mind, though.

"Bro, check the bar." Jasper jerked his chin.

Sitting at the bar were Christie and her friends. That chick Angela was with her again.

"This is what I was trying to avoid . . . Now if CJ sees me scoping some honey—it's my ass!" He widened his arms.

"How would you feel if I—"

"What are you and Bella anyway?" he asked. "Snuggle buddies? What's the deal? I come home…find her in your bed, and that seems to be an ongoing theme."

"No clue, man. I have no idea." There was no way I'd admit to hitting it already, although what I did say was true. "We're friends."

He nodded, staring at me intently.

"Stop with the eyes." I put my hand up to stop him, his eyes as wide as saucers. "Your sister looks at me the same way. I can't deal with you, too."

Jasper threw his head back and laughed. "You're really into her—my sister."

"Stop frontin' . . . like you ain't into Alice? We both know you are—that you have been." I shrugged. "Just embrace it. Would it really be horrible to have a steady lay? If all else fails, I mean?"

He scrunched his nose. "I see your point." He toasted his drink to me. "Wait…steady lay…?"

"I told you. It's not like that between Bella and me. We-we haven't done anything," I lied. "If, if we did, I'd treat her right. No worries."

"I respect that," he said. "CJ took me to lunch yesterday. We went to New Corners."

"Yeah?"

"He wants me to do his books." Jasper nodded. "I never answered him. I have to—tonight." His eyes widened again. "That's why I'm here."

"There's nothing illegal in that—"

"Are you kidding?" he laughed. "I'd have to fluff books, too, make phony invoices . . . I don't know. God forbid something happened—"

"You plan to rip him off?" I asked.

"No."

"Then don't worry about it." I sat back, bopping my head to the music. "But if you don't wanna do it, just say no."

"That's the thing. With what he's offering . . . I could pay Bella's tuition within weeks."

I shook my head. "Don't do it because of that. I told you I'd loan you the money," I said.

He puffed his cheeks. "How do you say no?"

"That's easy."

"You didn't." He snorted.

"I needed a favor…it was a given." I didn't know what to say.

"I could get Bella a cell phone. I could fix the roof, maybe buy a new bed, a new boiler. The one we have's about to blow—" he counted off his fingers "—I could get us health insurance."

I nodded my head along with him. "I told you—"

"Ed, we don't want your money. Okay?"

I put my palms up. "We're family. That's all I'm saying."

"And I appreciate it. I really do." He gave my forearm a squeeze. "But you know what I'd really like to know?"

"What?" I spied CJ and now Riley by the bar.

"What's going on between you and Bella, man?" he guffawed. "Just tell me."

I sighed, staring into his eyes. "Jasper, I love you, but lay the fuck off. All right? We were flirting back and forth—we keep each other company, and I—" I didn't want to get into me caring for her, or our conversations, after I'd found her that day. "I haven't even taken her on a date yet. Things are also different now. I don't wanna rush her or anything."

"It's cool. She broke a few things down for me. I love you, too, by the way. And that was one of them. You're a great guy. You're respectful, but if you break her heart—"

"I respect that." I gave him a fist pound.

"Oh!" CJ shouted, coming over to palm my cheeks. "How's it goin'?" He kissed me on each side of my face. "I heard you were…" he paused, looking to the ceiling, "fucking spectacular!"

I laughed, shaking my head.

"This is for you." He slid an envelope into my jacket. "It's from Riley, but I wanted to give it to you." He left his arm draped over my shoulders. "Jasper, given any thought to what we spoke about?"

My buddy nodded. "I'd like to do a trial run…just to make sure it's shit I can handle."

CJ reached over to hit his bicep. "Sounds good. What's my sister up to tonight?"

"Chillin' with Bella at the house." Jasper poured himself more rum.

"How's Bella doin'?" He jerked his chin.

"Good," Jasper said. "She—she's acting like nothing happened. Not that I know what happened." He looked from CJ to me.

That was when Riley and Marcus came over.

"This fuckin' guy!" Riley kissed my cheeks, quick to gain everyone's attention. "We're in the middle of nowhere—meeting Aro's friend, and—"

"Aro?" I asked, as I still had no idea who that cat was.

"I told you. The guy who set me up with Willy." Riley shrugged. "Anyway, this fucking dude, gets out the car—has two fucking pieces in his hands like it's the wild-wild west and shit, or fucking black ops." He chuckled.

CJ squeezed my shoulder. "I knew you'd do good. My pops had faith—"

"He knows?" I kept my voice down so only he heard me.

"Old man C knows ev-ery-thing." Riley spoke with his hands. "It was his idea I take you. Speaking of, I need to have a chat with my friend Edward."

I furrowed my brow.

CJ slid out of the booth so I could leave the table. "I'll catch you later." He slapped his hand to mine. "Jasper, Jasper, Jasper," he laughed, sidling up to Jazz. "Alice just doesn't stop talking about you."

My buddy put his drink down, sitting straight.

I smiled while I was led away by Riley.


	52. Chapter 52

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Two**

"Take this." Riley handed me a piece of paper.

We were by the bar, easily concealed by the bodies that filled the space, but I took extra precautions, gazing at this paper.

"It's just a name," he said.

"Right." In lieu of looking, I stuffed it into my pocket. "What's it about?"

"It's a name and address…something I need you to take care of. It's for me—I'd pay you." He nodded.

I blinked, confused.

"You know what I'm saying?" he asked.

"I think so." I looked around us.

"Look, you follow this guy, and when the opportunity presents itself—boom. Hit 'em up and be ghost. No clean up. You leave him in the street to bleed. Simple, right?"

"How much?" I asked.

"For that motherfucker? How much you want for it?"

I smirked. "He never did jack shit to me."

"On the contrary, this cat's the reason we was shot at. You feel me? But he don't know about that unless his boys told him. It's all good. I had a sit-down earlier today."

"Okay…" I guessed that Aro guy's name was on the piece of paper.

He straightened out my collar. "I think me and you—I think we'll be good friends."

I raised a brow. "Sure."

He grinned, giving my cheek a light pat. "I'll give you thirty large."

My eyes widened for a millisecond, but I was quick to act blasé. "That's it? I just got twenty for driving with you."

He sucked his teeth. "Forty."

I shook my head, leaning to his ear. "Murder's a stretch from driving. You feel me?"

"I do…" He nodded. "Sixty. I won't go any higher. _I_ can do it myself for free—" Riley had me there.

"Fine." I put my hand out.

We shook on it.

"He owns a club out in Manhattan—cheesy joint in the village. He parks his car in one of those garages . . . Unfortunately, most of those spots have cameras. You'll have to clip him while he's on his way in or on his way out."

"Right, right." I nodded.

"You meet me tomorrow. I'll have a nine ready for you. Don't use your shiny new toy."

I didn't comment at all, waiting for him to say more.

"You're in, you're out, and you do your best not to be seen. Understand? Somebody sees you…I don't have to explain. Do I?"

"I get it." Truth be told, I was torn. It sounded easy enough, and . . . I had fun.

Shooting back at Willy and his friends gave me some kind of thrill, as sick as it sounds.

And Jake . . . I enjoyed the fuck outta that shit.

"Tail him . . . whenever you think it's easiest, you pop him one. What do you want me to tell ya?" He shrugged, smiling. "I trust you to make it happen. You get half before and the other half after."

I nodded.

"Sound good?" He gave my shoulder a squeeze.

"Definitely."

Riley sighed, placing his arm over my shoulder. "There's a few people your godfather wants you to meet." He led me over to a booth in the far corner of the room. Oddly enough, Colleoni Sr. sat at that table, and I hadn't even seen him the whole time I was here.

"Edward!" He stood up to embrace me.

I smiled, hugging him tightly.

"Riley and Ceej treatin' you all right?"

"Yes, very." I patted his back.

"Excellent." He sounded like his son, turning us to his table companions. "You remember Caius?"

A middle-aged man rose to shake my hand.

"I'm sorry," I apologized for not being able to place him in my memory.

"Eh…you were this big." Caius held his hand to his waist. "You look—madonn'!" He stared at Carlisle Sr. "He looks just like Big Ed!"

I kept my smile in place, because everybody I meet seems to say that.

"You need anything? You come see me, all right?" Caius asked.

"Thank you." I shook his hand once more.

Carlisle Colleoni Sr. wasn't finished introducing me to people just yet. "This is Aro—Caius's brother."

Aro was younger than his brother Caius. Looked to be in his mid-thirties, although his hairline was receding. It surprised me that he'd be here, after what he'd done—setting Riley up and all—and that there was a mark just placed on his back.

"How you doin'?" I asked.

"Can't complain." He didn't give me the time of day, which was cool. The less I liked him, the less I got to know him better, especially with what I had to do . . .

"You'll know them around the way as the Volturi brothers."

Even if I knew the name—made the connection to Jane, the first girl to ever touch my cock—I didn't bring it up.

"And next week, it'll just be Caius," Senior whispered in my ear.

_So, he knew . . ._

That made me more comfortable with what Riley asked me to do.

"This is Aldo."

I shook his hand.

"That's Mario."

"How you doin'?" I asked, giving him a head nod.

Senior introduced me to…what seemed like the entire club. I'd never remember all their names—never. By the time he was through, a good hour had passed.

"Thanks for humoring an old man."

"Old?" I scoffed. "Please, you could probably take me down a peg or two." It was true. The old man was solid, looked to be in great health.

He chuckled, patting my back. "You're a good kid. I knew you would be."

"Thank you for saying that." It meant a lot, coming from him, as if I had my own father's approval.

He walked with me, going back over to my booth. From afar, I could see that CJ and Jasper were chuckling about something.

"Cigno's got a good head on his shoulders," he spoke of Jasper. "But I hoped you and my Alice would hit it off."

"Oh!" I exclaimed. "Well—"

"Kid, relax," he laughed. "I know she's had her sights set on Cigno for a long while. No worries. You're dating Isabella, I heard?"

"Yes," I was fast to say. "It's…early, but I'd like to…take her out one night, get to know her better."

He nodded. "You do that. You care for her…? Lemme tell you one thing I learned from what happened to your pops. There's no time like the present. We don't know what the future holds, or if we'll even have a tomorrow. You gotta live in the moment, kid." He hugged me tight once more. "I'm outta hea—gotta get home to my Esme." He leaned away to smile. "I mean, my glory days are over . . . and this is what they call music?" He grimaced, pointing up. "Have a good time. I'll see you soon."

"All right. Did you want me to walk you out?"

"Nah…Aldo's bringing the car around." He looked about the club.

"It was great seeing you again."

"Stop by the house—hang out with Esme." He waved a finger at me.

I chuckled, nodding and agreeing.

Later that night, Riley would call to tell me to forget about the hit placed on Aro Volturi.

And I didn't ask any questions.


	53. Chapter 53

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

*****NOTE: Some time passes between Chapter 52 and 53. The story has been moving VERY slow with everyday accounts. In CH53, Edward tells his story from the end of June to the middle of August. Six/Seven weeks pass by ****

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Three**

**_G_**oing to Gazebo turned into a nightly routine.

In fact, my entire schedule became routine-like.

For over a week straight, I'd spend my days at the pizzeria. Then I'd go home and have dinner with Bella and sometimes Jasper. His sister always made us dinner, always. After that Bella and I would either watch TV or have beers on the stoop, just chillin' out. Some nights we'd go for a walk, but then once ten o'clock rolled around, I was heading to CJ's club.

It was mostly to keep up appearances, get the guys accustomed to seeing my face—that's what Riley said.

On July Fourth weekend, I was approached about going for another run. This time, I'd be with Emmett and we were hijacking a truck full of cigarettes. It seemed old school, something you'd see in a mob movie from the 70s. But apparently, with the recession, wise guys were stealing anything they could get their hands on these days.

After all, it didn't matter if whoever-the-fuck sold the cigarettes for pennies; it was all profit since it was stolen.

Luckily, we only had to drive out to the middle of Pennsylvania.

It was a day trip, and I made an easy five grand.

Being with Emmett wasn't awkward at all.

He never mentioned Jake—never even said his name—and neither did I.

We didn't talk about Bella either.

The next run happened two days later with Marcus. This time, it was a truck loaded with electronics, and that was a big score. It took us just over a day to grab it and then bring it to the warehouse upstate, but I made thirty large off that heist.

But as soon as I got home, I'd fall back into a familiar pattern—the pizzeria, hanging out with Bella and Jasper, and chillin, having drinks at Gazebo.

Bella and I were still taking it slow . . . achingly so.

She made no move. She was never so bold as she was that one night—she never did anything, which surprised me, and I . . . I had no idea what was going through her mind.

Bella had changed. She was quiet, kept herself busy with house work, and yeah. She wasn't the bold, sexual beast she'd portrayed the month prior. Nor did she act like the battered mouse, or cry all the time.

She was just quiet, would often bite her tongue, I think. Because her attitude, her anger didn't pop out at times anymore either. She was reserved in a way, more mature.

Every time I brought up Jake, or…anything, she'd clam up and refuse to speak about it. She wanted to put the whole thing behind her, move forward, and she honestly seemed fine—happy even.

Was I still interested? Fuck, yeah, I was.

As the days turned into weeks and then a month had flown by, I wanted Bella in the worst way imaginable.

It got to the point where I swore I needed her, needed her to be my constant.

We morphed into best friends, something that was refreshing to say the least.

We were comfortable.

And every once in while, she'd still sneak into my bed to snuggle.

But she wasn't giving me any vibes…that she wanted me as something more than a friend.

And the last thing I wanted to do was push her. I could end up pushing her away, or scarring her even more.

Honestly, I was more concerned with getting involved, making money than focusing on broads, Bella, or my dick. It didn't bother me, except for the fact that I wanted Bella so badly. I wanted the old Bella back…?

I knew things would be different between us after what that asshole put her through. Trust me; I sympathized, but she was doing so well . . . she really and truly seemed pretty fucking happy.

I constantly berated myself for being a pig—longing and aching for her touch, wanting to kiss her, taste her again, fucking be her man.

Our dynamic had shifted, and I had no idea how to go back in time.

The guys tease behind my back and in my face about women—or lack thereof. CJ told me to let it go, telling me how young Bella was, and that maybe I needed a real woman—one my own age.

But I didn't give a fuck.

I didn't want anybody else.

And I'd rather be Bella's teddy bear than nothing at all to her.

Overall, things were going well for me.

Who was I to complain?

I had more money than I knew what to do with.

I had more friends than I had time to spend with.

But at the end of the day, the only people who I cared for were Bella and Jasper.

Sometimes, I wished things would slow down business-wise so I had more time to spend with them. I pulled so many jobs; I was spending at least three and sometimes four days a week on the road.

And I wanted to be home more; however, that's not how things were—nothing was slowing down—and I was living life in the fast lane.

Anyone needed something done, they'd call the kid—me.

And shit moved fast . . .

We worked fast.

I was grateful for each and every opportunity.

Most of the shit I'd do was fun and exciting.

And CJ said I was their most valuable asset, because I was flying under the radar.

No one knew who I was.

Surprisingly enough, though, the hit on Aro Volturi was back on the first week of August. Riley shocked the hell outta me when he brought it up since more than a month had passed.

The only reason it was called off was because Aro had booked a three-week cruise around the islands.

Again, I had my own time frame, as I had to scope this guy out and utilize the best opportunity.

After a few days of following him, I realized that he stopped at a little no-name donut shop every mid-morning/early afternoon. He'd park his car right out front, give his order, and then go into the john to take a leak.

Now, I checked out the shop, too.

The back door, which led out to an alley, was always left open—propped ajar with a crate.

And I followed him for more than a week to make sure he was a creature of habit.

On a Tuesday in mid-August, I planned to carry it out. I had my shades and a baseball cap on, too—fully equipped.

Having found a decent spot for the car I borrowed from Ruffalo, I attached the silencer to the nine I was using and then placed it in my waist.

Then I had to wait for the perfect moment.

Spying Aro enter the joint, I snuck around the back to go in through the alley. I kept my eyes open, always looking every which way—over my shoulders, up and down the block, you name it; I fucking saw it.

And as soon as he had his cock in his hand, leaning into the urinal, I popped one in his dome. He fell forward, making little noise.

I shot another quiet bullet into his skull before I flew out of there.

No one saw me and I hauled ass to that whip I borrowed.

It was a total rush—half scared, yet excited—but then I had to do the speed limit the entire way home.

I made it back to Sal's before the lunch rush started coming in. Ruffalo had his car back—which he didn't exactly know that I borrowed—and I ditched my disguise along with the gloves I wore and the nine I cleaned quickly.

"Where were you?" Jasper asked.

I sighed, pushing my hair back; I wasn't used to having hair after sporting a crew cut for so many years. "I forgot my phone at the house."

"It took you over an hour to go down the block?" he laughed.

I shrugged. "Someone came to the door—tryin'a sell me something."

He let it go, continuing to wipe the counter down.

**_*** In Chapter 54 and 55, we'll hear from Bella!***_**

**_Thank you for reading!_**


	54. Chapter 54

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

*****NOTE: Some time passes between Chapter 52 and 53, and THEN ch54.**

**The story has been moving VERY slow with everyday accounts. In CH53, Edward tells his story from the end of June to the middle of August. Six/Seven weeks pass by, and another has past by until 54. Sorry. I don't want anyone confused. ****

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Four**

**Bella POV**

**_F_**rom Rosalie's porch, I had the perfect view of the pizzeria.

I didn't need an excuse to speak to Edward anymore.

But I liked to watch him.

The way he interacts when I'm not around . . . He can be playful.

Like right now, he's pretending to box with Jasper—throwing mock punches on the sidewalk with a cigarette hanging from his mouth.

They'd only stop when someone would walk by.

"Bella…" Rosalie nudged me.

"Yeah?" I turned back to her.

She came to sit next to me on the step with her notebook. "Mrs. Gianelli needs one of us there by seven tonight. She's going out with her husband or something."

"Oh…" I was actually looking forward to staying home tonight, knowing Edward would be there. I know he has to go to the club later on, but he said he had nothing else going—he'd be home for dinner.

In fact, he just came home after spending a few days away.

I missed him.

"I can't tonight."

She nodded. "Then…I'll do it." Rose jotted a few notes down. "She doesn't mind if Em comes over."

After that one day at Alice's, Rosalie and I devised a plan. We wanted to make our own babysitting business.

I mean, yeah. I'll be nineteen next month, and I've never held a job.

But Rose was going on twenty-three, and…

I didn't want to be her at twenty-three, living off my father.

For one, I don't have a father.

I know Jazz would never throw me out for being a lazy deadbeat.

But I wanted to get him off my ass, and my so-called last summer of freedom before adulthood wasn't as wild and free as I'd hoped it would be.

I don't know.

I was free, finally free, and I found myself being a wet blanket instead of some party girl…or Edward's girl.

And I wanted to help with the bills—do more than cook and clean our house.

That's my saving grace, why Jasper doesn't protest too much.

I do my best to take care of my guys—Jasper and Edward. Plus, with Jazz working for CJ, he's making extra side money off the books.

Earlier this week, Jasper gave me some cash to get new clothes . . .

I didn't want him to have to do that anymore.

Also, I think Jasper did it to make me smile.

It's not so much a business as much as we'd spread the word about our services.

We're like babysitters for stay-at-home mob wives around the neighborhood.

That's what sucks.

Many women around here don't have jobs . . . they don't need childcare, and Rose refuses to expand, or go places she can't walk to.

"Marie wants you on Tuesday, though. She called me yesterday. She needs you to be there by three—she has a doctor's appointment. You won't be there all day."

"Okay." I smiled because I actually enjoy watching little Bianca.

"Oh!" Rose grabbed my arm, sounding excited. "I was talking to Mrs. Rodriguez—"

"The old lady next door?" I asked.

She nodded. "My mom was actually talking to her. Then Mom told me to contact her . . . She was talking about paying one of us to grocery shop for her. It'll be pennies—not much, but…" She shrugged, pursing her lips. "It's something we could do in between babysitting gigs."

"We could totally do that." I placed my hand on her forearm. "That'd be cool. Old people and kids . . . We could help out."

"Not help." She snorted. "_They_ pay—_we_ help. It's not like we're rolling in dough." She was correct.

"Whatever." When the wind picked up, I placed my hair behind my ears.

"What's—" Rosalie stood up, staring to the avenue.

I hopped, craning my neck and squinting my eyes to see, too.

Riley must have showed up while I wasn't looking. He and Edward were suddenly roughing some guy up—right in front of the pizza parlor.

"Let's go inside." Rose grabbed my hand. "I wanna soda anyway."

"No…" Worried, I walked down the stairs.

"Bella…just leave it. Don't—"

"It's Edward," I said.

Rose rolled her eyes. "What do you want with that brute anyway?"

"Shut up!" I stared up at her. "He's not—"

"He is!" She stomped her foot. "Maybe that's your thing, but going for the tough guy didn't work out so well last time. Now, did it?"

"Shut up…it's Edward. He's nothing like…Jake," I whispered before I sprinted to the corner. I also couldn't see Jasper, and I hoped he was inside making meatballs or something.

By the time I got there, it was an open scuffle—some dude I know around the way as Peeps was being tossed between Edward and Riley while getting his ass beat by both.

Peeps wasn't putting up much of a fight at all, but Edward kept wailing on him.

Riley found it all hilarious.

He wasn't breaking it up.

Edward was going to kill him. My love sees red and…he really knows how to throw a beating.

Fearful, I thought I should stop him. "Ed—" Before I could say more, I was pulled into the pizzeria by Jasper.

"Whatta you doin'?" he asked me.

I looked outside.

Jasper turned my chin back to him. "Stay out of it."

"But—"

"Get outta hea! Ya fuckin' junkie!" Riley kicked at Peeps' ass while he scrambled to a crawl to get away.

"Bella—" Jasper shook me "—mind your business. Okay? Don't get involved."

"I—" I didn't know what to say. "I was at Rose's and—"

"I know where you were," Jasper said, smiling. "Are you hungry?" He ushered me farther inside.

"No." I turned to look for Edward.

"Eat something." Jasper snapped his fingers in my face. "Ruffalo just made these kick-ass calzones—fucking cheese, scrambled eggs, and bacon. We're gonna start opening an hour earlier—serve breakfast."

"Um—" I watched Edward enter Sal's. He had blood on his shirt, but I doubt it was his, a cut on his eyebrow, and reddened and raw knuckles.

His hands are always bruised because he's the new knockaround guy—Colleoni's new muscle.

He drives Alice's dad sometimes, too, and that's a huge step up. Only the top guys can have such access to Colleoni Sr.

And I heard that Edward's moving up fast. He was a force to be reckoned with, and people were frightened of him.

As per Alice, who's sneaky, Edward's been collecting for CJ, and supposedly people pay right away. There are very few problems.

Rosalie and Alice actually have tried to sway me to date someone else—forget about Edward. My friends were concerned about my past, and they equate Edward to Jake—how tough he is.

They didn't know him—that's what I'd tell them. That he's doing what he's gotta do.

But more and more, I see him fighting, I see him doing this or that.

It's a turn-on, all that power he commands yet manages to never ask for.

However, Edward was enjoying it too much.

He was turning into…something…a brute, like Rose said, just like Jake…which made me queasy. I was starting to see Rosalie and Alice's point.

As much as I yearned and ached for his touch, the thought of Edward changing made my skin crawl.

But Edward isn't Jake—he could never, ever hurt me.

"You going shopping later?" Jasper asked, gaining my attention again.

"I planned on it," I whispered.

"Shopping for what?" Edward grabbed a Snapple out of the fridge to hold it to his eye. "Fuck."

"Are you okay?" I jumped up to get some napkins.

"I'm good," Edward said.

"You're bleeding." I reached to wipe at it.

"That fuck got'chu good with that bottle," Riley guffawed.

"A bottle!" I exclaimed.

"Rye…" Jasper gave him a look.

Riley stared at me. "Excuse me." He went to pour himself a cup of coffee.

I waved a hand, wanting to tend to Edward.

"I'm okay." He squeezed my hand and kissed my forehead, like my grandmother would have. "No worries." And I felt useless again, like I had no purpose in Edward's life.

I do his laundry and make him dinner . . . that's it, though.

Meanwhile, he does so much for me by just sitting and talking to me, sharing his bed on occasion when I get into a mood, or have a nightmare.

It's not as though I enjoy being plagued by my fears at night.

The first time it happened, I woke up sweating to death, my heart pounding away in my chest. My breath caught, too, and I couldn't breathe.

It was weird. Jake was dead, a zombie, and he was chasing me—following me around. And no matter what I did, no matter how much I fought to get free, I couldn't get to Edward; I couldn't find him.

It surprised me because…I kept telling myself it was no big deal, what Jake did, what Jake had done. It was over now, and I had to move on.

As the days went by, though, I realized how _big_ a deal it was.

And at my insistence, I don't talk about that one day . . . I couldn't, it seemed.

Putting it behind me and moving forward worked for a while, but…nowadays I wanna talk about it.

I just don't know how, how to put my feelings and fears into words, or even broach the subject. Sometimes it feels like an eternity has passed since that day.

Other times, it feels like just yesterday.

I changed my behavior.

The weight of Emmett's words that day at Alice's weighed heavily on my shoulders.

And most of all, above all else, I wanted Edward to take me seriously.

I'm dressing differently, minding my mouth—thinking before I speak—and things are okay.

Jasper thinks I'm depressed and he wants to send me to therapy.

Maybe I withhold things; however, when we talk, I don't have to pretend to be strong. I don't have to be any way or mind a damn thing…except that I have to pay attention to detail, or . . . well, I leave a lot of details out. But how _I_ feel, how _I'm_ doing—I don't have to lie to Jasper about that.

But I hate that he worries, so . . .

I try my best to smile as much as I can, even with all this sadness in my heart.

I keep telling myself I'm depressed because…it seems like Edward doesn't want me the way he used to. He doesn't gawk at me, although I doubt I'm much to look at these days.

He doesn't flirt, and I've stopped throwing myself at him.

When I spoke to Alice about that she commented, said it was a good thing.

I had Edward's respect if nothing else.

I just thank God Edward hasn't found a girlfriend or something.

_I'd die . . ._

That would kill me, I was sure.

Most of all, Jasper thinks I'm bored.

_I'm not a person yet._

Sure, Alice, Rose, and I go to the beach a few times a week. We hang out by Ali's pool. We lounge around; however—as per Jasper—none of us does anything of substance.

He's said again, and again, and again—and I'll repeat his words, "You're not a person yet," like I'm still some kid.

And I felt trapped, somewhere between a high school student and an adult. Wanting to be mature, but wanting to have a good time, too, since I'd never _lived_ before.

I was stuck—between the past and the present, and I didn't know how…to reach for the future? How to become a_person_?

I've never been much for hobbies.

Watching TV isn't a hobby . . .

I've never been crazy smart…

I felt empty, like I had nothing and nothing to give.

But Jasper says once I'm busy, I'll have other things to focus on, and I ached for that, too—the want and need to do something, the ambition I don't seem to have.

"Going shopping?" Edward dug a wad of cash out of his pocket.

I put my hand up to protest. As far as I know, he gives Jasper money to live with us—help with expenses, which includes food. I go grocery shopping once a week for us all.

"Food shopping, Ed." Jasper went behind the counter to help customers. "I'm giving her my debit card." He turned to the patrons, so they could order.

"Oh…" Edward counted out some cash anyway. "Get some nice steaks." He pursed his lips. "We should use the grill before it starts getting cold."

"Cool." I smiled.

He grinned back, palming my cheek, and I waited for him to say something—anything. Edward searched my eyes—for what, I wasn't sure.

"You'll be home tonight?" I whispered, leaning into his hand.

He nodded. "Yeah." His thumb rubbed my bottom lip, while he licked his, and I wanted his tongue in my mouth.

That was another paradox altogether.

I didn't know why…I mean…

The terrors Jake put me through . . . While most of them were sexual in nature, that doesn't stop me from wanting Edward sexually. But if you ask me, the differences between what I'd done with Edward—which was sex—and what I'd done with Jake—which was also sex—are far and wide.

Everything Jake did was wrong.

Everything I had with Edward was so right.

"I could rent us some DVDs?" I asked, excitement filling my belly, butterflies. If we watch movies, maybe he won't go out tonight. I'll be able to spend more time with him.

"Sounds awesome. Oh—" He searched his pockets, and then he took out a lollipop. "I was at Coney Island earlier, stopped at that candy shop you like."

"Thanks," I sighed, just staring up at him.

God…he was beautiful. It made my stomach ache just to look. His hair was longer these days, usually in wild disarray. Although he had more clothes now, he still rocks those white undershirts and baggy jeans to chill around the neighborhood.

It's still summer, so it's fitting. His muscles showing…just him, _all_ of him.

I remember every detail from that night that also feels like an eternity ago.

I think I've stared enough to remember every contour and plane of his beefy chest and arms.

Edward is crazy strong.

"I'll get a bunch next time to keep on the counter." He took it out of the wrapper. "I bet they'd sell." He held it out to me.

"Thanks." My mouth was watering already, but it had nothing to do with the candy.

"Hey…" Jasper joined us again. "Heard you say you wanted to grill?"

Edward nodded. "I'll cook. This one cooks too much." He placed his arm around me, and I melted into his side, wanting to mount him—placing my nose to his chest to take a hearty whiff of him.

"You okay?" Edward asked.

I stiffened, looking up to him. "Yeah." I swallowed unconsciously, and it got stuck, making an "ung" noise come out.

He stared into my eyes again, which paralyzed me while he rubbed my back for a quick second. Then he palmed my cheek again. "So pretty." He mouthed.

I opened my mouth to say something, but Jasper cut me off.

"We should set it up for tomorrow." My brother stared at me. "We can get beers, more food, you could invite Rosalie and Alice…I'll invite a few guys."

My poor introvert of a brother was trying to make me happy. I knew what he was doing. The cookout would be for me—a party I actually could and would attend since it'd be in my backyard.

Edward slapped his hand to Jasper's. "That's what's up. Sounds good."

"I'll bring my wife," Riley interjected.

"'Bout time you brought her somewhere." Edward snorted.

Riley grinned in his direction. "I'll talk to my boy Mario—get the booze." He shrugged, sipping his coffee.

"Yeah, to say goodbye to summer." Jasper touched my cheek. "To new beginnings."

I smiled, looking between my brother and Edward—my guys.

And everything seemed to fade away.

I remembered feeling that as long as I had them, I'd be okay.

I could make it through anything.


	55. Chapter 55

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Five**

**BELLA POV**

**_I_**nstead of going shopping last night, all three of us had pizza from Sal's and watched the movies I'd rented. We chilled out, laughed, and had a good time—me and my guys. It was late when we all trailed up to our rooms.

I decided to go to the grocery store the next morning. Edward was home again, and I was ecstatic that he wanted to join me.

It wasn't a date, a fancy restaurant, but I treasured every moment I got to be with him alone—always hoping and praying he'd kiss me silly or something.

But just walking up and down the aisles, popping things into the cart, was fine by me.

"One time, on the base?" He had his arms around me, and my back was leaning on his chest. His arms trapped me while he also pushed the cart. "We put lobster tails on the grill—they came out fantastic."

I giggled. "We're more—hot dog and hamburger people."

"Whatever's clever…it was just a thought." We'd stopped at the seafood section.

"I haven't had lobster in forever. Since Gram was still alive. She'd make them on Christmas Eve."

"We should get some…even if I just make it for you." He touched my chin with his knuckle, making me look up. "Can I make it for you?"

"Yeah." I felt my cheeks flush, and I looked away—embarrassed.

"So cute." He kissed my cheek, which…

I stopped moving; I stopped breathing.

It wasn't my forehead, or my hair…it wasn't my lips either.

But again, I'd take it.

Edward carried on like nothing had transpired, asking the guy behind the counter to wrap up a few tails—only a few. They were for Jasper, Edward, and me. He said, fuck everyone else.

Meanwhile, I went from being shocked to cringing on the inside.

Who was I?

What was I doing? Being this mousy, scared of my own shadow…loser?

Months ago, I'd managed to seduce him. I managed to make love to him . . . I realized that this morning, as I was thinking things over once more.

_My mind's always going_.

It wasn't just sex that we had. It meant so much more. We shared something that was…I didn't have a name for it.

So, why couldn't I do it again?

I mean, I knew why.

I thought if I pushed and pushed like I did, he'd back off.

I'd rather have him as a friend than nothing at all, too.

Frustrated and heated, suddenly burning up, I stuffed a few grapes into my mouth.

"Oh…these are gonna be fantastic. I can't wait 'til you taste 'em." Edward placed the lobster into the cart. "We might need more butter. I know you said we had some—"

"Hmm?" With a mouthful of grapes, I realized he was speaking.

He pursed his lips down to them. "Gimme one."

Smiling and chewing, I popped one into his mouth, and then we carried on—finished the shopping—and we needed to get more grapes.

Edward stayed true to his word. He was cooking, and he wouldn't let me lift a finger. As soon as we got home, he marinated the chicken in some BBQ sauce, got some other shit ready to go, too—placing hot dogs on a platter with the hamburgers, although it'd be hours before anyone arrived. The fridge was full of things, set for later.

Little did I know, Edward had other plans.

I thought I'd get to spend the day with him—_alone_—in the kitchen. That we could hang out—_alone_—until it was time to cook or our friends showed up, and Jasper got home from work.

But Marcus was coming over so they could tweak Edward's car, and I didn't know why. It was brand new.

Edward said something about it being too quiet for a muscle car? I had no fucking clue, but he droned on and on to inform me.

Still, I sat on the stoop with a soda and watched…watched Edward lean over the hood and get lost within the mechanics, watched him laugh and goof around with his friends.

Then Mario stopped by with a keg and the liquor. He followed me into the backyard to set it all up and put the keg in the big bucket of ice.

Mario handed Edward a package before leaving, saying he'd be back later for the BBQ.

Even if I was crazy curious as to what he'd given Edward, I wasn't nosy. I didn't ask, now eating potato chips on the stoop.

"What's up?" Jasper came home in the middle of it all. "What'd you do today?" He grabbed the chip bag from me and stole my soda.

"Nothing much. We did the grocery shopping."

"Did you fill out an application at Stop & Shop?" he asked.

"Uh…the babysitting is really taking off. We're booked almost all of next week."

He nodded. "But—"

"I'll do it—fill out applications. I promise." I felt defensive, even there was no need for it, not with Jasper.

"Cool. You still have two months until you got school since you start in October." He glanced at me. "Ever think about going to real college, like me? You can still sign up at Kingsborough," he spoke of the community college.

"I'm…_you're_ the smart one," I laughed.

"That's bullshit, B. You just—you never applied yourself. In college, it's different. You get to pick your own courses, study things you'd like to know more about," he sighed, giving my hand a squeeze. "Think about it."

"I will," I promised. "But—"

"It'd be the same amount. Don't worry about money. _I_ worry about money. Not you," he said.

"Okay," I whispered. "I can take out student loans if I went to the community college."

"You could…you'll apply for financial aid too." He stuffed a handful of chips into his mouth. "You like babysitting? Take some child development classes—whatever. Rich fucks in the city pay mad money to nannys with degrees." He nodded. "And there's nothing wrong with it. You'd get paid for something you enjoy." He faced me again. "Or you could teach…? You like kids."

"Right," I said.

"I say all this because…Do you really want me to take care of you forever? Before you answer, just know that _I know_how young you are. I know you have your whole life ahead of you—" he widened his arms, laughing "—but that's all bullshit. The time is now. And I'll help you with studying and shit. "

"I understand." I was actually ashamed for being lazy all summer. I should have pulled myself together sooner, done something. "I promise. I'll, I'll get a real job. Part-time, though, since I do babysit. And I'll go to school. I'd still like to go to the beauty school."

"Whatever, and I'm glad…'cause I won't lay off until you do something." He dug through his school bag. "I gotta course catalog from Kingsborough for you. Get busy." He stared at the guys messing with Edward's car, too. Then he left me to join them.

They got into car-speak and I sighed, sitting back and enjoying the sun that came out from behind the clouds.

Having a tank on under my t-shirt, I took my top layer off and rolled my shorts up to get those last rays of sunshine. I also opened the catalog to browse the courses available for undergrads, junior college.

After breathing deep and relaxing, I almost fell asleep. The hot sun felt amazing on my skin.

"Hey…" It was Edward, and there was a shadow above me now.

I used my hand to keep the bright light out of my eyes. "What's up?"

He cleared his throat and sat next to me. "I got you something."

"Me?" I asked. "Why?"

"I wanted to." He went to take whatever it was out of the package, but then wiped motor oil on his wife-beater undershirt. "I'm a mess—I'll get grease on it. You open it."

I smiled, taking it from him, and it wasn't wrapped so much as covered by a manila envelope. "You—" No matter what he gave me, the image in front of me, of him, was the hottest thing I'd ever seen. Edward, dirty and sweaty, yet managing to still smell fantastic.

"What?" He scooted closer and then fanned out my t-shirt to cover my legs, while gazing back to his friends. "You'll burn."

"Oh…" I finally sat up. "Um…thank you."

He laughed. "Baby, you don't even know what it is." He bit his lip, staring at me.

I let out a shaky breath and opened the envelope. What was inside…I couldn't imagine why it was wrapped or why his boy had to bring it over...unless it was stolen.

_Now that'd make sense._

It was an iPod touch, a newer model one. "Wow."

"You like your music…now it can go wherever you go."

"Thanks." I loved it. "But what's it for?" My birthday was weeks off, and I hadn't done anything to warrant a gift.

"It's for you."

"I know, but—"

"I wanted to." He shrugged. "This week, I'll get a laptop we can share, 'cause I got the guy coming on Tuesday to install Wi-Fi." He chuckled. "That way we can download some shit on it for you. Sound good?"

I nodded. "Thanks so much." Filthy or not, I wrapped my arms around him.

He squeezed me and let out a soft growl, which was more of a sigh as he rubbed my back. His touch—being in his arms—went straight to my crotch.

I actually felt myself getting wetter by the second.

And I might have stuck my tongue out, applying it gently to his shoulder. He didn't even notice, but I wanted his sweat…in my mouth, needing to taste him.

The old Bella, the one who chased Edward, would have let him know . . . about how wet I was.

The new me was bold, but not slutty.

I turned my head to kiss his cheek—kiss _him_ for once.

And he stiffened within the embrace.

Feeling like I'd done wrong, I let go, moving away. "Sorry."

"For what?" He furrowed his brow, pulling on his pant legs.

"I—I should call Alice." I pointed into the house.

He nodded. "I should—I should—" Edward gestured to his car, leaving the step.

"Right." I stood up, my eyes following him as he joined Marcus and Jasper again.

Once I had the door closed, I had to run for the couch so I could scream into the cushions.

As soon as I got it out, I peeked out the window to spy on him again while I also grabbed the phone to call Alice.

She picked up right away. "What's up, bb?"

"Nothing," I sighed. "Guess what?"

"Chicken butt," she giggled.

I smiled wide. "Edward got me an iPod."

"No shit? The new one that just came out?"

"Yeah," I said.

She sucked her teeth.

"What?" I asked.

"I got one, too. My dad literally just gave it to me, and Marie got one from CJ . . . I bet a truck meant for the Apple Store got sidetracked—"

"Mary Alice!" Mr. Colleoni scolded. "Off the phone, now!"

"Shit…Sorry, Daddy." I heard her heels clicking against her tiled floor. She was probably running away. "I have such a big mouth…I know not to spill the important crap, though. It's just you."

I giggled. "Edward won't talk about stuff on the phone, though . . . like at all."

"That's Edward. _I_ don't do nothin'."

"It was still nice, right? Him giving that to me?"

"Very nice." She groaned. "I'll be over soon. I just have cramps and I'm bloated. I don't wanna put my bathing suit on."

"Alice, we don't have a pool," I laughed, leaving the couch.

"It's still a BBQ, damn-near ninety degrees…Jazzy likes my bikini." She squealed. "My Jazzy. Now he's a reason to smile."

I agreed with her, staring out at my brother who was laughing so hard with Edward about something. He looked so happy. "Yeah."

"Oh…you have that tone. Are you spying on Edward?"

I thought it sad she knew. "Maybe…"

She groaned again. "I think you should move on. Now that man's a Rubik's Cube."

Alice would never understand if I said I couldn't.

"When was the last time you snuck into his bed?"

"Two days ago…when he came home," I said. "He's so sweet. Edward came home with this giant teddy bear—"

"I just don't understand you two."

"You don't have to," I laughed.

"I understand the iPod, but the stuffed animals and the candy?" she scoffed. "Does he think you're eight?"

"No…" I picked at my toenail. "He knows I like that stuff."

"Get him a greeting card that says, 'I like cock' and see what he gives you then." She laughed her ass off, and it made me chuckle, too. "I made Jasper a card for our six-week anniversary since…uh, he wasn't doing a certain something?"

"Oh gawd," I drawled. "That's where that came from?" My brother thought nothing of it, left it out for anyone to see, or maybe he just didn't give a shit—construction paper in the shape of a heart that said, "Eat Me" on it.

"I saw it…very romantic," I lied.

"It was more of a subtle hint—"

"Subtle?" I giggled. "Why didn't you put it on a billboard?"

"Girl, you know I'm unemployed," she sighed. "My dad's getting impatient—says I have to do something. He doesn't give a fuck what it is, but I'm leaving at the end of the month, so…I've just stopped spending money. Speaking of, I talked to Rose, and she had the only attitude. I wanna join the babysitter's club. Do you remember those books?"

"Um, yeah . . . I don't see a problem, but will you take it seriously? We care for children—"

"God, Bella. I'm not stupid."

"I know!" I rushed out.

"I asked Ceej if I could bartend, and he laughed at me—said he pay to keep me outta Gazebo, evil fucker. But I gotta do something…I hafta do…ugh. It's exhausting, waiting for your brother to call me."

I nodded even if she couldn't see.

"What's his deal? I don't know why I just can't hang around your crib. I'd be there with you . . . If it weren't for you, I wouldn't even know about the BBQ."

I scrunched my nose, wondering what Jasper's deal was.

"Whatta we gonna do with these men?" she asked.

"I don't know," I sighed. "Maybe it's the age gape? We don't understand—"

"No, they're fucktards. That's why. Neva-theless, I'm content. A little bit of Jazzy is better than none." Maybe she would understand about my feelings for Edward? No, she wouldn't. It's okay for her to be whatever to Jazz, but not okay for me to lust after Edward. There is a difference, as they actually have sex and…whatever.

"Oh…" Curious, I smiled to myself. "How'd the card work out for you?" Morbidly curious was more like it.

She moaned and groaned. "I think it'd work better if my vag just falls on his face. Like if I just sat on his face one day? Why don't some guys like doing it?"

"I don't know." I'd never done that with a guy before, so I didn't know. The closest I'd ever gotten was…touching myself that time, when Edward sucked my fingers into his mouth.

"Ask Edward."

"What?" I shouted. "You're crazy. Ask CJ."

"I can't ask him that," she giggled. "I'll ask Emmett or Edward later. All my mom had to say was that it's an…acquired taste, which was kind of cryptic, I think. But this is the woman who only just recently sat me down to have the talk . . . She knows Jasper and I are getting closer—she thinks I might lose my virginity to him, wants me on the pill. Can you believe her?" Alice lost her V-card back when we were freshmen in high school. "Weirdest convo ever."

"At least…you have someone. You know? No one talked to me. Gram never did, and God forbid Jasper—I only had you." I rolled my eyes, 'cause she's never been much help in that department, only ever telling me how wonderful it was. Imagine my surprise when . . . it wasn't, not until Edward.

"Oh, B . . . You can borrow my mom anytime. She'd love it, I bet. Just make sure she's sober. Shit. I had to school Marie. You know how religious her family is. My God. And CJ's so fucking dumb, but he waited—waited until she was ready."

"While he was screwing other broads," I said; meanwhile, her prior sincerity had me teary-eyed for some reason. "What's wrong with me?" I asked myself, wiping my eyes.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing…I should go."

"'K. See you soon." She ended the call.

I shut the phone off, only for her to call me right back. "I had an idea," Alice said.

"Okay." I left the couch to stare outside again. Edward was impossibly greasier, making a face as he wrenched something under the hood. "I just wanna say that you don't know what I'm looking at right now." Alice would love it, too. Marcus had left, and Jasper was helping my Edward.

My friend groaned. "Edward's doing something…? I don't care. Listen, you know my neighbor? Tyler? He was touring Europe all summer, and he's back. He's lookin' good…I can—"

"No," I said.

"Lemme finish."

"No," I repeated myself. "Edward and I had an agreement—"

"Which was like a lifetime ago. You don't know what he's doing when he's here or there—on the road, too. Just because he's not bringing skanks home—"

"Shut up." I got angry. "Don't say that. It's not true."

"He won't be living there forever. Once his house is ready—"

I hung up on her, not wanting to hear it, no matter how logical her words were.

Edward wouldn't. Plus, he doesn't stay out all night. When he has to go on a run, that's different. But he'll still call every day to make sure shit is cool here—with me and Jasper. And he never smells like perfume . . . never has glitter or makeup on his face.


	56. Chapter 56

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Six**

**Bella POV**

**_S_**till aggravated by Alice's words, I went upstairs to pick out something to wear tonight.

We don't have a pool, so I wasn't going to wear my bathing suit.

I took out a sundress with a floral pattern to go with my beige gladiator sandals.

Thinking I'd look cute, I was satisfied with my choice.

Yet . . . I couldn't keep myself away from the window.

There was something very hot about Edward working on his car, covered in grease and sweat.

And I'm the loser who ran out of her bedroom when he slammed the hood down. By the time I got downstairs, Edward was washing his hands in the sink with GoJo. The scent wafted to my nose . . . I became intoxicated by it.

I briefly thought about seeking psychiatric help…help with this obsession I have. Maybe therapy ain't so bad? What was wrong with me?

"Hey." He turned to smile at me.

I was half hidden by the door, staring at him creepy-like. "Hey." I did my best to act like I wasn't doing that. "What's up?" I went for nonchalance.

He shook his head, backing away from the counter, and then . . .

Edward took his shirt off to throw it into the garbage. "It's ruined."

Sweat dripped, making a trail down his rippled tummy.

"Woo, I need a shower." He winced.

"Yeah, you do," Jasper laughed.

Edward clapped. "I'll get to it and then start cooking."

"Good. I'm starved." Jasper dried his hands with paper towels. "B, you okay?"

"What…?" I asked. They were both staring at me. "I'm okay. Are you okay? You guys, I mean. It was really hot out, and you were sweating. You should drink more water."

Edward chuckled. "Yeah…we should do that." When he passed me, he gently pinched my side, which made me jump. It tickled.

Once he was gone, Jasper furrowed his brow. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing." I clamped my thighs closed, thought I was about to faint with how horny and frustrated I was.

"You're being weird—I feel it." He smirked at me. "Weirder than…what's normal for you these days." He came over to nudge me. "Are you ever…gonna be the same?"

I opened my mouth to respond, but I didn't have an answer, only I did . . . once I snapped out of it. "I'm still me."

"Okay." His tone was sarcastic as he left the kitchen, fast to run upstairs.

Contemplative, I stared into the garbage can.

Like a bandit, I swiped Edward's shirt from the trash, and then hauled ass up to my bedroom.

Then, like a pig in shit, I hugged it to my chest…rolling around my bed, the heady scent making my mouth water, turning me on even more.

Before I knew it, my hand snuck into my panties.

I was soaked, groaning into Edward's tank as I played with my clit.

_Edward was between my legs, using his mouth—licking my pussy, while his hands ran up the outsides of my thighs to grasp my hips tightly._

_My hand came down to weave my fingers into his soft hair, pulling it and pushing into his face._

_But I was anxious—needing to feel him, all of him, have him fill me up to where there's no room for anything else . . . just him._

_Edward smirked, his green eyes sparkling as he trailed kisses up my body. He stopped at my breasts, nipping at my chest while his cock found me. He slid right in, the vigor of his movements going from slow to fast._

Before I knew it, my stomach tied in knots, and I came around my fingers.

Panting and a giddy mess, I smiled as I covered myself with my sheet . . . so I could do it again. It was amazing, simply amazing, and I didn't know I'd never done it before—double clicked my own mouse.

After my third orgasm, I felt lighter—almost dizzy with delight as I drifted off to sleep, and I dreamed of nothing. I just went out cold.

"Bella…?" I heard Edward. "Bella…baby?" He nuzzled his nose into my neck. "Mwah!" And he landed a loud kiss there, too.

I smiled, opening my eyes.

"There you are." He beamed back at me.

It was kind of dark in my bedroom, but I remembered locking the door. Hoping he couldn't see, I pushed his discarded shirt under my pillows.

"I was worried about you." He rubbed my back. "Missed you."

"How—how did you get in?"

His eyes widened. "I didn't think of that. I'm sorry." I didn't know why he was apologizing. "I'd called you—you didn't answer. Jazz said you probably knocked out…I dunno. I jimmied it open. I didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't…Are people here?" I sat up.

He nodded. "There's a yard full of people, but it's not much of a party without you."

Edward was so close, in my bed, although being in a bed with him is nothing new . . .

I wanted to touch him, taste his mouth.

Mustering all the courage I had, I got onto my knees to crawl onto his lap. Edward let me do it, leaning back to let me get situated.

"You okay?" Of course he'd think something was wrong.

"No." I wrapped my arms around his neck, hoping he'd kiss me. "I mean, yes. I'm fine."

His fingers dug into the flesh on my hips, and a moan escaped my lips. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Don't be." I leaned in, staring at his mouth. "Edward—" I was ready to ask for it.

He grinned, his nose touching mine, and his hands were on me. "Shhh." Edward's lips lightly grazed my own, and I closed my eyes while my stomach filled with butterflies. My body was an instant blaze. I was tingling all over, thought I'd explode now.

"Bella…" he whispered, his hands coming up to cup my cheeks.

"Don't be sorry," I nearly begged, knowing he'd apologize or something. "Just—I want it."

He swallowed, pushing my hair back yet coming toward me once again. Edward held my chin and tilted his head.

This was it.

Sadly, his tongue had barely slipped between my lips when we were startled apart. My door flew open.

"Yo!" Rose shouted, light from the hall invading the darkness of my bedroom.

Edward groaned, throwing himself back. "Are you fuckin' kidding me?" Meanwhile, my heart was ready to jump out of my chest. I couldn't think at the moment, flustered beyond belief…and angry that she barged in, ruined what was a perfect moment.

Rosalie was laughing, her hand on my doorknob. "You're sleeping the party away. Come on, B!"

"Get'da fuck out!" Edward barked, pointing.

"Oh…you're not getting' loud with me." She moved her arm with a flourish, spilling some of her drink, obviously drunk.

"Rose…" My teeth were clenched, and I gave her a wide-eyed look.

"Bullshit…" Edward placed me to his side, making me leave his lap.

I plopped down onto my mattress with a slight bounce. "Edward!" I called out for him.

He left my room, giving me a backward wave.

Rose sat next to me. "Come on. Wanna play Pong?"

I covered my face with my hands. "Do you not even realize—" Pissed, it took everything within me not to throw my fist out and punch her. "Edward was gonna kiss me—"

"Psst!" She busted out laughing. "Yeah, right."

I cringed. "He was!"

She continued to chuckle until she looked at me. "Why so serious?" She shook me.

"You're trashed." I shook my head.

"Oh…I know why I came up. Do you have a tampon I can borrow?"

"Borrow?" I actually laughed, leaving my bed. "You can keep it." I massaged my forehead. "Alice has her period, too...You could have asked her. "

"I just started mine—veered off course. Youse two are almost done, right?" She adjusted her breasts in my mirror.

While I tried to think back, remember . . . "No, no, no, no…" I dove for the floor to dig my messenger bag, which was still full of my high school books, out from under my bed.

"What's wrong?" Rose asked.

My heart was racing as I rummaged through my book bag for my day planner.

Because . . . the last time I remembered having my period was during graduation.

Skimming to the page, I saw the date—June 18th—circled.

Dread filled my gut and I swore I was going to be sick.

I didn't get my period in July, and we were currently in the middle, close to the end of August. How could I not realize? My head's been so full of other things…I think all the time. How…?

"You got lip gloss?" Rose had moved on from her concern, using my mascara.

"There you bitches are." Alice joined us, drink in hand. "Ugh…my dad's here. Can you believe it?" She sat on my bed. "He's talking Jasper's ear off." Her eyes landed on me. "What's the matter?"

"I need another drink." Rosalie ignored us, had forgotten her objective and stumbled out of my bedroom.

"Bella?" Alice slumped down onto the floor, scooting closer. "You okay?"

I opened my mouth, but I didn't know where to begin as I faced her.

"Why are you crying?" she asked, and I didn't even realize I was. "You want me to get Jasper?" She wiped under my eyes. "Edward?"

"No!" I was quick to say, snapping out of it. "This—this was the last time." I pointed to my tiny calendar.

"Last…time?" She gazed down. "PD? What's—holy shit!" Alice understood. "That was in June!"

"I know." I sobbed into my hands.

"Don't panic." She pulled me into her arms. "It'll be okay. You went through shit. Right? Maybe stress—do you feel pregnant?"

"I—no, I don't know."

"Christ…whose is it? Fucking Jake—"

"No," I cried, burying my head with my hands. "Not Jake's." I'd avoided that asshole like the plague, hadn't slept with him since weeks before my last period. I'd gotten lucky. Lucky. Lucky. But now…?

"Then…? Who were you fucking that—" Her eyes widened. "Edward?"

"We only did it once. Oh my God." An anxious mess, I cringed and stiffened, swearing I was going to fall to pieces. "I'm—I don't have a job. I don't have anything. I don't—I can't tell him. I can barely voice my feelings, and—"

"Sweetie, it only takes one time. Relax. It's not the end of the world."

"What? Have an abortion?" I sat up, calming some.

"I did…you know that already." She frowned. "It wasn't that scary. I mean, no one knows besides you . . . Riley was really nice about it. Edward might surprise you."

I shook my head. "I—"

"Calm down because we don't know for sure. That's one. Okay? I'll stay over. In the morning, we'll get you a pregnancy test?"

"Wait until morning . . ." Having it on my mind would eat me alive.

"Besides…you're gonna be nineteen. I was seventeen, screwing a married man." She snorted. "I moved on…You'll be all right. I promise."

"You didn't love Riley . . . I—this would be Edward's baby." I palmed my stomach. "And I love babies, and I love—"

"Yeah, but…" She pushed the hair away from my face. "B, there's a chance Edward could take off. You'd be doing this alone. Well, not totally alone. I'd be your baby's daddy."

"Thanks," I whispered.

"When did you sleep with Edward?" she asked.

"June—June 30th. It was that night we went to Gazebo."

"You'd be over six weeks by now, I think." She counted on her fingers. "Regardless, you should tell Edward. If you decide to have the abortion, he should pay for it—at least. And if you…Look, he doesn't seem like the type to knock someone up and then not give a fuck…but you never know."

"I _don't_ know," I whispered and jumped when my door opened again.

"Hey." Edward poked his head in.

I swore my heart stopped for a second, only to speed up.

"Um…" Alice squeezed my hand. "I'll be right back."

When she left, Edward came in to sit on the floor next to me. I closed my calendar and tried to…be normal. Whatever the fuck that is.

"Sorry about before."

"What?" I asked.

"I…I was really upset—we were interrupted." He held my hand.

"Oh." I cracked a grin.

He sighed, staring at me. "What's wrong?"

"I—" I racked my brain for an excuse. "Summer's almost over. You'll be moving out soon. G-guess I'm sad." My voice broke but I was fast to clear my throat. "I'm thirsty."

He handed me his cup. "Easy…it's a Long Island Iced Tea. CJ mixed a whole vat of it," he laughed. "You're missing some party."

I grinned, placing his drink down—just in case. I knew that much about pregnancy—no alcohol.

"I don't even know when my place'll be ready. And I'll be right down the block. I'll give you a key, so you can come over whenever." He shrugged, guzzling his drink.

"You'll give me a key? You mean that?" I was hopeful.

"I mean that." He kissed my cheek, and I leaned into his lips. Alas, he didn't go for my mouth.

"Thanks . . . and you don't hafta go unless you want," I whispered.

"Come on." He stood up, extending his hand. "Your lobster tail is almost ready. I made you a plate with some chicken…I didn't know what you'd want, but I put a lot aside for you."

I smiled even if my heart was breaking—confused, and already in a million pieces. "Everything will be okay?"

"Oh . . ." He nodded, frowning and pulling me into his side. "Of course. You've made leaps and bounds already." Edward was referring to . . .

"Right," I said, going down to join the party with him.


	57. Chapter 57

**Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Seven**

**_B_**y the time September rolled around, I was going out of my mind—horny as fuck. Luckily, since it wasn't as hot, women were starting to wear more clothes—mainly Bella wore more clothes. I thanked God for that, but I had to bite my tongue most times.

The night of the BBQ, I thought that my kiss—our kiss—fucked with her head.

I'd found her crying to Alice shortly after, and then she brought up what'd happened…with Jake.

Bella was upset—continued to be crazy quiet and glassy-eyed for the rest of the evening.

Yet…she'd moved on from that Jake shit. I swore she did.

No, she wasn't dating—that I knew of—but more and more she was smiling and laughing and going about her life.

Does someone ever get over that kind of trauma, though?

We needed to talk, have a nice, long chat.

Where the fuck was the chick who played with her clit in front of me?

That's what I wanted to know.

I cringed into my pillow, Bella laying right next me. I'd gotten myself a larger bed last week—wishful thinking—a queen, as a king wouldn't fit in the tiny room.

Every morning, I watch her sleep, always waking up with the only hard-on.

She nestles into me, her ass rubbing on my shit . . .

One time while I was half-asleep, I caught myself . . . rubbing back, practically dry-humping her as she slept. I thanked God for that too—that she didn't wake up.

Something had to give.

While I sympathized with what happened, she let that subject die right along with that asshole.

And I didn't know where we stood.

I either wanted her to put me out of my misery—tell me to date someone else, or agree to go on a date with me.

The latter seemed like such a silly concept since we knew each other so well now.

In the last few months, I'd broken the law more times than I could count.

I'd chilled with some of the most-feared guys in the city . . .

I was making a name for myself in other—questionable venues, clipping fuckers, and yet the thought of asking Bella out . . .

It scared the fuck outta me.

Because . . . she could say no and I'd finally have an answer.

I'd have to move on.

The _worst_ she could do _was_ say no, but I didn't wanna hear that—no.

It got me thinking that maybe we weren't meant to be together.

That maybe, all we'd ever share was that time on the stairs.

Maybe we were meant to be good friends and that's it. We'd rocked the friendship boat. I adored her, and if I didn't wanna throw her down and fuck her senseless, we'd be even_ better_ friends.

"Morning." She smiled, sleepily.

"Morning." I left the bed, going into the bathroom.

"Edward?" She poked her head into the hall. "Are you okay?"

I nodded, placing toothpaste on my toothbrush. "Yeah."

"I'll go make breakfast." She left my bedroom, wearing my t-shirt, and I watched her legs as she went for the stairs.

When she was out of sight, I dropped my shoulders, hung my head, and I used the sink to support myself.

"You gonna be long?" Alice asked.

My head whipped to her. "When did you get here?"

"I gotta pee!" She danced from foot to foot.

I rolled my eyes, content to brush my teeth in the hallway.

Jasper's girlfriend took her sweet-ass time, frustrating me even more. I was about to knock on his door when Alice left the bathroom.

"Sorry. I just wanted to do my makeup," she told me, like I gave a fuck.

After showering and jacking my dick, I stared at myself in the mirror.

Truth be told, I hardly recognized the man staring back. My hair was longer than the buzz cut I had when I'd arrived, and . . . I just looked different.

"Good morning!" Jasper was too enthusiastic for my ass today, but that only means he got laid last night.

I grumbled nonsense, walking around him.

"Ed, you all right?"

I nodded. "I'm good." I closed my door to get dressed for the day.

Riley was meeting me at noon and then we were heading out, so I wore a suit.

And since I knew he'd be awake, I sent CJ a text message to inquire about the tenants at my old house.

Something had to give.

Maybe I just wasn't the type of person to have roommates. All of us sharing a bathroom, waiting and taking turns in the morning, Alice's annoying ass is here more and more, and Bella…she was too close.

Maybe I was meant to live—be alone, since I'd always been alone.

I'd always be eternally grateful—in Jasper's debt because he let me live here when I had nothing.

But I thought it was time for me to leave.

Don't get me wrong; I'd still look out for both Jasper and Bella, and I'll see them every day. I'd just keep residence down the street.

And if Bella only wanted to be my friend, we'd both have some privacy to go on with our lives.

'Cause . . .

I couldn't see her with someone else, as I already get jealous when she has plans with the girls, is babysitting or something, and I want to spend time with her...when I'm _able_ to spend time with her and _she's _busy.

I could see myself killing the fucker, whoever she'd date, whoever touched her, touched what's mine.

Nothing's happened yet, and I'm already sick with jealousy, sick with want and need.

Crazy that I can't have her.

My obsession…

How the tables have turned…

It's not healthy—none of this is healthy. It wasn't healthy back when she was chasing me, and it sure as fuck isn't now. My brain's fucked…is always on the same loop. I thank God that I haven't been around the past week.

But between doing this and that and traveling…my mind always goes back to her…Bella.

What's worse than all that…?

Bella doesn't need me anymore.

It's heartbreaking and confusing—needing her to need me, wanting her to want me. I'm not scared of anything. I've never been, but now I'm frightened of Bella's rejection, and that's what keeps my wants, needs, and me…me voicing my feelings at bay.

Because a little bit of Bella…a glimpse…is better than no Bella at all.

I was addicted to all things Bella—scared shitless of the impending withdrawal—while everything I loved and cherished about our existing relationship was starting to hurt.

It didn't feel good anymore.

Not at all.

/=/=/

As I made my way downstairs, CJ got back to me. My house would be ready for me to move into . . . the day after Bella's birthday . . . twelve days from now.

I pursed my lips, staring at the text.

"What happened?" Bella asked. She looked beautiful, her hair a wreck in a messy ponytail, her legs bare and peeking out from under my shirt.

"The people who live in my old house are moving out soon."

"Oh…" She dropped the spatula in her hand, and it landed by my feet.

I sighed, walking over the fallen utensil and around her to grab a cup of coffee.

She bent down to pick it up. "Are you sure nothing's wrong?"

"Why do you constantly ask me that?" I turned to her. "If something was wrong, I'd tell you," I said, which was a lie, since shit was fucked and I was afraid to open my mouth.

She had wide eyes. "I…I'm sorry . . . You always ask me that, too."

"Never mind." I sipped from my mug, my eyes trailing down her form.

"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed." Bella grinned at me, grabbing a piece of bacon from a plate.

I narrowed my eyes at her; meanwhile, I couldn't truly be mad _at_ her.

The situation? Yes.

Her? No.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, staring down. "Um—"

"Don't be sorry. You're right." I conjured a smile. "I'm…grumpy this morning."

Bella beamed. "Have some. It'll make you smile." She came toward me. "You love bacon."

I grasped her wrist, eating it from her hand. "It tastes good." I gazed into her eyes, hoping she'd give me a signal—anything to prove she was still interested. The last strand of hope I had came in the form of an almost kiss more than a week prior.

She stared at me with her mouth agape.

When I swallowed, I dipped my head to lick the grease from her fingers, swirling my tongue around to remind her of that night.

"Delicious," I whispered.

Bella swallowed, her chest heaved as her cheeks flushed crimson.

Her flustered expression made me grin; it satisfied me, gave me something—hope.

"You all right?" My nose touched hers, hands going to her waist. Ever so bold, I palmed her ass, pulling her into me and my half-erection.

Bella didn't say anything, but I knew she felt it.

"Bella? My beautiful girl." I chuckled, only to groan as I squeezed her ass. She felt amazing in my arms. "Bella…" I kissed her neck, trailing my lips to her mouth. She'd squirmed, but I didn't let her leave the embrace. "Chill…" I held her tighter.

She jumped, pushing me as she backed away from me. "Why are you…?"

I widened my arms, having no idea what she was talking about.

"It's like…you're slipping away or something. You're not you." Tears filled her eyes and I was getting so fucking tired of that shit—always crying or about to cry.

"What are you talking about?" I nearly shouted.

"Nothing," she said.

"I'm gonna be late." Feeling defeated, I left the house to meet up with Riley.

While everything went well as far as business was concerned, when I got home I locked my bedroom door so I could have my bed to myself.


	58. Chapter 58

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Eight**

**_T_**he more I tossed, turned, and thought about what Bella said, I realized that I hadn't changed.

Bella was different.

On her road to recovery, she stopped . . . taking risks? Stopped being ballsy? She seemed mousy in comparison to how she used to be. And I had no idea what that was from. She had nothing to worry about.

Jake was gone—literally.

She seemed like such a ferocious, sexual being months ago, and now…? Hey, I was glad I got a reaction out of her, but the girl I met back in June would have jumped for me…not away. Maybe I was aggressive, but she was totally digging the closeness seconds before.

Once upon a time, she did that . . . _jumped_ me.

But maybe I was the douchebag.

Maybe I wasn't being sensitive to her needs. She'd gone through something traumatic, and I was happy to be whatever she needed.

But I needed to know . . . that she wanted me, too?

I was so torn inside, more so than my thoughts about her had been when I first moved back. I knew what I wanted now—her.

Fuck. We didn't even have to . . . have sex if she didn't want to.

I'd be content just knowing she was _my_ girl. Knowing that someday, whenever she's ready, we could make love.

Yet, maybe she doesn't think of me in that way anymore.

And not knowing was killing me.

I'm an asshole and I know I've been acting like a bitch.

And I hated myself for it—trust me; I hated myself, but nothing stopped all those constant needs and thoughts, no matter how much I did know.

I'd offered to be her teddy bear, and I locked her out of my bedroom.

Before I knocked out, I unfastened the lock.

To my surprise, I woke up alone, but I deserved that.

All of which made me seek her as soon as I left my bed.

She wasn't in the bathroom, nor was she making breakfast.

She wasn't in the living room watching TV.

I found Bella sitting on the stoop with a cup of tea.

"Hey." I sat next to her.

She ignored me, which…maybe Bella wasn't throwing herself at me anymore, but she never ignores me.

"What's going on?" I pushed her hair behind her ear.

She shook her head. "School starts today . . . the elementary school up the street."

I nodded, hearing children laughing, screaming, and running around in the distance.

"I never see_ you_ anymore."

"I've been busy," I said.

"I gathered that." She stared down to her feet, a tear falling on her toe.

"Why are you crying?" I wiped under her eyes with my thumbs.

She sniffled. "I'll miss you when you go."

"I'll be right down the street. You can see my house from here." I pointed to the townhouse identical to this one. "You'll see me all the time."

"Thank you for respecting my wishes…you know, about coffee?"

I smiled. "Don't mention it."

The truth was, I couldn't imagine hurting her or disrespecting her in that way. No matter how fucking horny I was. It's just hard—being at the clubs and bars with all the different women throwing themselves at me. Maybe I didn't get much play in the beginning, but now…? Fuck me.

"Uh, can we, can we talk about that?" I asked.

"About what?" She blinked, crestfallen. I could tell she was trying not to cry.

"What's going on?" Truly concerned, I scooted closer to her. "Tell me." I put my arm around her.

She nestled into me, holding onto my undershirt. "I'm…scared."

"I told you. You have nothing to be scared of, or worried about." I kissed her hair.

She cried into my side.

"Bella…" I rubbed her back. "Please, talk to me."

"I can't."

"You have in the past…You can—" I was at a loss.

"Not with this," she whispered.

I nodded. "It's about a dude?" My heart felt as though it was breaking. "Another dude, I mean? You're not my girlfriend. You can…date." It killed me to say that and to be so nice about it, but my words were true.

"I—"

"It's a guy?" I seethed, my stomach in knots.

"Yeah…it's, it's about someone—someone…else."

"Ouch." I shook my head, taking my arm back. "Uh…" Angry, I tried to mask it. "Who is he?"

"No one," she cried into her hands. "I swear."

"Bella." I made her look at me, grasped her jaw. "Tell me who he is."

"Oww, you're hurting me." She shook her head, jerking back.

I groaned, pulling my hair. "Do I know him?"

Bella remained silent.

"Fuckin' answer me!" I shouted.

"I'm sorry." She jumped away from me. "Don't yell at me!"

I nodded. "_I'm_ sorry." I swore I was going out of my mind. "You're fucking with my head…You've been fucking with me since I got here." I left the step. I was about to lose my temper, and Bella was the last person I ever wanted to hurt…even so.

"What? Edward, no—" she reached for me "—you don't understand."

I put my hands up. "Stay away from me." I couldn't lose it here. About to see red, I hurried to leave the stoop.

"What?"

I had nothing else to say, backing into the house. "You wanna be friends? Cool, but—" I ran up the stairs, 'cause I couldn't do this anymore.

I needed to cool down and when that happens, hopefully I'll have my head together—I could be who she needed without silly notions of us being a couple in my head.

And like a madman, I began to pack my shit.


	59. Chapter 59

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Fifty-Nine**

**_J_**asper must have heard me stomping around. He came to see what was up. "You all right?"

I nodded, throwing shit into my large duffle.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I don't know…just away."

He sat on my bed. "Did you talk to Bella?"

I nodded. "I did."

"And…?" He raised a brow. "Did you make those dinner reservations?"

I snorted, thinking it ironic. Someone who was so against the idea of me dating his sister was now my biggest supporter. "There's another guy."

"What?" He furrowed his brow. "What guy?"

"I don't know. That's what she said. Maybe between going here and there—me being busy—she got her kicks and then came to play snuggly-poke with me." I shrugged.

"Fuck you!" he shouted. "My sister ain't like that."

"You sure?" I was taken aback. "When she was with Jake . . . You know what?" I laughed, and I wasn't going to do this with him. "I don't wanna fight with you."

He stepped toward me, like he was going to do something. "Say what you were gonna say."

"Forget it." I managed to pack quite a few things, enough clothes for a while. "I'll see you at Sal's."

"Hold on. Be a man and fucking talk to me." He cornered me by the stairs.

"Jasper—" I let out a shaky laugh as I ran down the steps. "I'll be in touch."

When I went to walk past Bella, I slowed down, to see if she had anything to say to me.

She didn't.

**Relax...he's not going far, nor is he pulling a New Moon. LOL.**

**Thank you for reading!**


	60. Chapter 60

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**NOTE: Have faith in me. And thanks to everyone who continues to read and review.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty**

**Bella POV**

"Bella? Come on, Bella. Open up." Jasper knocked on my door.

"No," I said.

My door was locked, and I didn't want to get out of bed.

"You gotta eat . . . You know? This shit is ridiculous. I'm calling Edward—just gonna tell him to bring his ass back here. He wants to be a douche to you? He can deal with your downfall—make sure you eat. What the fuck, B? Open this door!"

"Don't…leave it alone." I rolled over to sob into my pillow. "Leave _me_ alone."

"Bella…" My brother had a tone and he _would_ call Edward, only I didn't wanna see Edward.

Sniffling and trying to compose myself, I slowly left my bed to unlock my door. "What?"

Jasper grabbed me, threw me over his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I cried, beating at his back.

He brought me into the bathroom, gently placed me in the bathtub. "I can't do this, Bella." He turned on the water, and I gasped. It was cold before he adjusted the knobs. "How long's it been since you showered?"

I didn't say anything because I didn't remember.

It was probably last week, when I went with Alice to Planned Parenthood.

She lent me the money to have an exam.

I'm nine weeks . . . pregnant.

She's gonna lend me the money for the procedure, too.

"If you think I won't undress you, you're mistaken. Okay? Lunch is almost ready. When you're done cleaning up, you're going to eat." He pushed my wet hair out of my eyes. "Bella…?" He slapped my cheek. "Did you hear me?"

"Yes." I rasped. "I'm sorry." My face crumbled as I cried. "You can just leave me…leave me alone. Don't worry about me."

"I can't do that…and stop crying for fuck's sake…Jesus." He took my wet socks off of me. "You miss Edward? I think he's home…He's right down the street, and he'll also be at Sal's tomorrow afternoon. Get outta bed and talk to him."

"He doesn't want me. What's the point? I—"

He sighed. "Bella-boo-baby, he was never your boyfriend. He was _my _friend…he was never anything—" Jasper's words angered me.

"He was everything!" I barked. "No one understands."

"Help me, B…Help me understand. I'll listen." Jasper had tears in his own eyes. "Talk to me, please . . . What really happened with Jake…? What really happened with Edward? Talk to me!" he ranted. "You hid behind Edward. You never got past that Jake shit, and now everything is hitting you at once…?" He shook his head. "Then…_you_ pushed Edward away, I think…I don't know. I have no idea. Just talk to me. Tell me!"

The sight of his worried face made me feel even worse. Jasper was close to the mark, yet so far away. I don't know. Everything hit me at once…but the pain, this heartache was different. The shit with Jake seems like nothing in comparison to this, how I feel now.

"I'll—I'll be better," I whispered. "I promise."

"You're saying that to placate me, B . . . Who you foolin'? Fuck. It's _just_ us—you and me—all we have is each other. You gotta lean on me 'cause I'm all you have. You gotta gimme a clue, so I can help you. You wanna try therapy? Maybe—maybe—meds? Fuck. I should have sent you months ago after that asshole—"

"I'm over that . . . My life just sucks…It's pointless. I have nothing, and-and I'm a drain on you. You'd be better off without me," I sobbed.

"Don't say that." Jasper got into the tub with me. "Oh, come here." He pulled me into his arms to hug me tight. "You don't need Edward. You don't need him. He's_ just_ some dude, and no fucker deserves your tears. You wanna boyfriend? You gotta get outta this house—meet people. Fuck Edward!"

"It's not his fault—"

He groaned. "Just help me out. What's going on with you? Why—"

"I'm just sad…and I'm tired." I cleared my throat.

He nodded. "Wash up…brush your fucking teeth, and then we're having lunch." He left the shower. "We're eating at the table. After that, hey, you wanna go back to bed? You're tired? Fine. Meet me halfway."

All of those…menial tasks I used to do every day...It felt like he was asking me to run a ten-mile marathon.

But I did it . . . I showered, brushed my teeth, and put clean pajamas on before I went into the kitchen.

Alice was here. I hadn't seen her since my doctor's appointment, and she's been at school. She was taking a tray of lasagna out of the oven. "It's your favorite," she said. "Marie made it."

"Thanks," I whispered, going to sit at the table.

"I've been good." She stared at me. "Life at the dorms is lonely. Thanks for asking."

"Don't give her shit." Jasper scoffed, placing a soda down in front of me. "Drink it."

Alice didn't reply to either one of us, taking a seat.

But Jasper's patience was worn thin. "You're eating." He served me a large portion. "Every bite, and you're not leaving the table until you do. Understand?"

"Yes."

"You're not a child," he said.

"I know." I nodded.

"Just thought I'd remind you." He placed the fork in my hand.

Alice rubbed my cheek. "I missed you."

"I'm okay," I whispered. "I'm just sad…I'll be all right. Just let me feel, whatever." I wasn't crying, proof that I'd used all my tears.

"Edward is—" She started.

"Alice!" Jasper banged his fist down. "I don't wanna hear about him. Okay?"

She ignored him, looking to me. "He was staying at CJ's apartment, but now that he's at his place…" She shook her head. "No matter where he was, he was holed up—no one's seen him for days. He's working but laying low. Last I heard, CJ was gonna take him out—try to cheer him up."

"Why—" I didn't know why Edward would be sad. He's got his wings now. He doesn't have me weighing him down anymore.

"I tried calling him," Alice sighed.

"Don't," I said. "I'm pathetic." My lip quivered. "After I…" I made eye contact with Alice. "I'll be fine." But the thought alone—having the abortion—made me all the more sad.

Logically, I knew it was the right thing—the sensible thing to do. However, I kept thinking that maybe once I did it, once it was gone, I'd be able to move on—carry on.

"After what?" Jazz asked with a mouthful.

Neither Alice nor I replied, and I tried my best to eat the lasagna. And I didn't realize how hungry I was until I swallowed some. Within five minutes, I'd gobbled down what was on my plate.

Jasper nodded. "You feel better, right? You needed real food in you." He served me some more.

"Thanks." I tucked into my plate, content to continue eating.

Keeping his word, my brother didn't give me any crap when I wanted to go back into my bedroom.

Before I went upstairs, I made myself a big glass of chocolate milk, thinking I was a bottomless fucking pit because I grabbed a package of Chips Ahoy, too, sneaking it upstairs under my arm.

Once in bed, I sat with my blanket over my head and ate my cookies.

"Bella?" It was Alice.

"What?"

She giggled. "I remember when we used to do this." She entered, pulling my covers over herself. "Oh, you got cookies, too?" She smiled, taking one.

"I'm just…" I knew I could be honest with her, but I didn't know what to say.

"I got a check for you," she whispered, handing it over. "I made it out to them already. All you gotta do is hand it to them."

"Thanks." By now, I think I was just numb.

"Before you do it, you gotta tell Edward. You can't—" She groaned. "_I_ felt better after having it done. But you're not me. You're…maternal or whatever. I mean, I agree with Jasper. You're being stupid because Edward's there _if_ you want him—"

"He—"

"He left but he didn't go far." She gave my foot a squeeze. "Sweetie, he was never your boyfriend . . . And after that shit with Jake…you never dealt with it. After that you ate, lived, and breathed Edward…You were addicted to him. You know? I think—I think you hit rock bottom, but you gotta snap out of this. I don't even recognize you," she rambled. "Bella, please…I mean, where the fuck are your balls? You're tougher than this." She was right, I think. "You didn't even do anything for your birthday—"

"It was just a day," I said.

She smiled. "We should celebrate tonight. We'll do a girls' movie night. I'll call Rosalie. I'll get Marie to come with the baby. That'll cheer you up."

I started crying again. "I don't wanna see the baby."

"Then…I'll tell Marie to leave her wit' my mom. Open your mouth. Don't cry." She was getting upset with me.

"I'm sorry—"

"Don't apologize," she sighed, leaving my sanctuary that was my bed. "You're upset, plus all the hormones surging through you…"

I didn't reply or have a comment.

"Take this." She handed me a key.

"What's this?" I asked.

"It's to Edward's place. Go there, talk to him…please," she begged. "What's the worst that can happen?"

"He could leave for real. He has the money to."

She shook her head. "He won't do that. Trust me, and…he's-he's a good guy. You say you're knocked up…Fuck, he might even marry you, so…you're being dumb." She ranted on and on, barely taking a breath. "I thought he might take off, but that was before I found out how _involved_ he is. He can't go anywhere…I bet he marries you. He'll have to…to save face with how Catholic and old school everyone is around here. If not, I mean—"

"What?"

She laughed. "Edward marrying you caught your attention. Huh?" It was crazy because her words did spark an interest. "Think about it. How many people do we know are married because of an accident?" She looked to my stomach. "I'll say it again. I did what was right for _me_, but, Bella, you're _not_ me. The abortion could be the mistake."

"Keep it?" I tried not to smile at the thought, but I totally did . . . having the baby, marrying Edward . . . all my dreams would come true. He'd be mine. We'd have a baby…a baby. Baby. Baby.

That image of Edward and me at the beach…a toddler with us came flooding back to me.

"You're nineteen. You're an adult, which is why you gotta put on your big girl panties and talk to him—what you should'a done months ago." She threw herself back. "We all could've avoided this. You should have told him you were late at the BBQ. Seriously, B…I don't know who you are anymore."

"I don't know either."

"You hid behind Edward and what happened—"

"You sound like my brother." I'd cut her off.

"Jasper said that, but I agree…You should have gone to talk to someone, too," she whispered. "It's not too late…to go to therapy."

I shrugged, my mind torn about a lot of things, but I'd calmed down.

As mild as the relief was, opening up a bit and talking to her helped.

Or…was it what _she'd_ said that helped ease the pain?

Alice was sticking around to hang out with Jasper because I said I wanted to take a nap. She'd left my room shortly after she'd suggested I go see someone.

Everything she said was correct, though.

Everything Jasper said was true, too.

And I really thought myself pathetic.

I went from having a set of balls to having none. I'd survived every time Jake would hit me, beat on me. I'd be fine days later, but now…? Maybe I was never fine. Maybe it all came crashing down? Why I felt so horrible, couldn't snap out of this depression? Carry on? The past week, I've contemplated suicide more times than ever before—my existence seeming pointless. I was worthless, but I had a baby inside me.

A baby I'd plan to get rid of anyway.

Maybe…I really didn't want to die.

Maybe…I really didn't want to get rid of the baby.

I'd gone from being sexy to…having greasy hair and stinky breath.

I went from being miserable to happy, and now I'm fucked again.

But…

As I stood in front of my mirror, I lifted my shirt to stare at my stomach. Then I leaned back, pushing my gut out…just to see how I'd look in a few months if I decided to keep the baby.

It'd been easier to think of…he or she as an "it," not a real person.

I mean, a baby…

Half of Edward…

Half of me…

I started to think, too, and I had no idea where this…inner strength came from.

I didn't know what would happen tomorrow or the day after that.

But keeping my baby…it wouldn't be the end of the world.

If Edward decided to take off, if he didn't want to be with me . . .

Fuck, I'd be left with…

With what would probably be the best part of him—our baby, his son or daughter.

_My_ baby…

When I heard Jasper's headboard banging against his wall, I snatched the key Alice had given me, put my shoes on, and left the house.

It was drizzling and I pulled my hood up, hoping Edward was home. His car was in the driveway and it was early…only going on ten p.m.

He usually leaves for Gazebo at around eleven, and he drives there…

The weird thing about it—hours ago, days ago, yesterday—I was nervous and anxious to see him. Scared of what I'd do or feel when I _finally _saw him again.

But a numbness has encompassed me.

Taking a deep breath through my nose, I knocked.

When he didn't answer, I rang the bell.

After about ten minutes, I was going to run home.

Steeling my nerves, I used the key, and I was surprised to see that he had furniture already.

A leather couch and loveseat sat in the living room, along with a coffee table and a recliner.

There was nothing in the dining room, but he had a table in the kitchen. Nothing but beer in the fridge.

The longer I walked around his house, I grew all the more curious.

And…I started looking for any traces of another female.

Afraid I might be too late.

I went upstairs and he'd forgotten to turn off the bathroom light—the scent of his Cool Water cologne still lingered in the air.

I left the light on, going into the master suite. His house was almost an exact replica of ours, only newer—a better paint job, even if the walls were all white with primer.

His bed…

He had a king-sized bed here, whereas at my place he'd just recently bought a queen. There weren't any sheets, just a pillow and one of those fleece blankets.

It was then that I realized the extent of Edward's moving away.

He bought a new bed just so he wouldn't have to see me—come back to the house.

My body racked with sobs as I hugged his pillow to me tightly.

I forgot my objective.

I forgot—lost whatever strength I had.

I forgot about being embarrassed…for being so pathetic? And I embraced it like an asshole, sniffing at his pillow like a dog.

It got me thinking again…wondering about my pointless existence.

I was worthless.

I never wanted to do anything.

I never made a move to better myself.

If I kept the baby and did it alone, I'd have to go on Welfare, and then I'd never have anything. I'd never have the opportunity to educate myself.

Most of all, I didn't know how to be Bella anymore…without Edward.

It made me angry, resentment flowing through me.

But he didn't_ make_ me depend on him.

I did that on my own.

Before Edward came back, I was just me…I was able to deal…if _that_ was dealing. I didn't need him—because he was never there—I didn't need anyone.

I was Jake's doormat…his punching bag, his used whore.

I was someone Jasper had to constantly care for, a drain. I've likely ruined his life, him having to take care of me all the time, his crazy sister. If Edward hadn't come back, Jake would still be here. I wouldn't be pregnant, and I would have killed myself…so I could be free. Jasper would be free of me, and being dead was better than carrying on with Jake.

But Edward did come back…

Edward made me forget…

Confused, I groaned, covering myself with the blanket.

And then I realized I wasn't home.

What the fuck was I doing here?

Wait for it...

Won't be long now...

Have faith!

And thank you for reading!


	61. Chapter 61

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-One**

**_C_**J was nice enough to let me use his apartment for the time being.

And knowing Ruffalo would keep an eye on shit—if Jasper didn't—I stayed away for a while.

I didn't even hang out at the club.

Jasper called me.

Alice called me.

But Bella didn't seem to give a flying fuck.

I went to Jasper's graduation, and I was so proud of him. He got his bachelor's in business management and accounting, and I gave him a check for five grand—as a thank you and a gift.

We had a few beers that night and we talked. He couldn't give me any answers as far as Bella was concerned, nor did I ask. We never spoke of her. And quite frankly, I was okay with that—out of sight, out of mind, and all that.

Only, she stayed on my mind, no matter what I did.

No matter how hard I worked, doing this, hustling, and doing that, my mind always traveled back to her—wondering what she was up to.

On her birthday, I walked past the house to see if I'd catch her, and I didn't. I had this idea that she'd be on the stoop, drinking a beer—people watching or whatever she did.

I'd realized that I overreacted, but that was only because I loved her—I'd fallen in love with Bella. She consumed my every thought. She consumed me, and I tried to placate—be whatever she needed.

Maybe my feelings were one-sided…? I had no idea.

The day after, when I was moving into my house, I was starting from scratch again with nothing but my duffle.

Unable to stay idle, I went to a furniture shop and threw around some cash.

Again, I wondered how Bella would decorate my crib—how she'd style things. Weeks ago, I'd imagined us furniture shopping together, hoping one day we could share this house. I didn't like having roommates, but I loved Bella's company.

Most of my clothes were still at Jasper's, and most of my cash was hidden in the safe at the pizzeria. The rest, I deposited into the bank. CJ hooked me up with someone who could clean the money—fake like I'd invested in some shit, so it wouldn't be shady come tax season.

"You gotta snap outta this." CJ massaged my shoulder as my furniture was being delivered. "You're in a funk. I get it."

I had nothing to say.

"Look, I heard from Alice…your girl's really messed up."

"She's not my girl. She's some other dude's problem." I sat in my new recliner.

"Who?" He got defensive, much like I would have. "I know him?"

I shrugged.

"Just go over there. Say what's up, break bread, and keep the peace. Huh?" He nudged me.

"She played me to get what she wanted. She knew I was vulnerable—"

"How the _fuck_ were _you_ vulnerable?" he laughed. "If I remember correctly, she was the one who was attacked—fucking brutalized by that asshole. You—you were fine."

"I was lonely…She constantly threw herself at me. I was a pussy—confused. Then that shit popped off . . . I couldn't rush her, but I didn't expect her to move on right under my nose. I thought—I thought if and when she wanted me, she'd come at me."

"You wanna know what I see?" he asked, leaning on the chair. "When you came back, even if you was a marine, you were still a kid. I see a man now—someone who grew up. You're on two different wavelengths. She's a baby—immature like my sister. It's not a bad thing. It's just the way shit is, and you're an adult . . . Maybe youse two grew apart? It happens. Youse were never anything—you should move on."

I nodded. "Yeah."

"Come out tonight. I promise, it'll be a good time. It's my boy Anthony's coming home party. He was pinched a few years back—did time for high stakes gambling, but I digress." He put his hands up. "Before, you come to my parents' for a nice dinner."

"I don't wanna see anybody." And by anybody, I meant Alice. "I'll go to the club, though."

"All right." He slapped my back. "Sounds good. But I gotta go. See you around nine?"

I nodded, giving him a wave as he left.

All I knew was I needed to get my head together.

I needed to snap out of this funk because that's exactly what this was.

After the deliverymen were finished, I gave them some cash.

Being in my empty childhood home . . .

I never felt this lonely in my life; meanwhile, it looked nothing like the place I shared with my father.

It made me queasy.

/=/=/=/=/

The party at Gazebo was nothing special, but I had too much to drink. In fact, I had a crazy good time, playing cards, associating and branching out, making contacts.

CJ and Riley—like they always did—introduced me to everybody.

Yet, it was only around one o'clock when I was too fucked up. Sloppy drunk.

I needed to go home.

Riley offered me a ride since he needed to leave early. His wife's about to pop, have their baby or whatever. Meanwhile, we left with two chicks. Their names escaped me, but it was a blonde and a redhead.

Riley has a thing for Gingers.

"You live here?" the blonde asked, running her hand up my thigh.

I nodded, guzzling back the rest of my longneck. After drinking all the hard stuff, I switched to beer, took the fucking thing with me when we left. "Yup." I belched, which made blondie laugh.

"Tanya," Riley said.

The chick next to me stuck her head between the two front seats, so I guess that's her name.

"Make sure my boy gets to the door—go with him." He winked at me.

"I'm good," I said, opening the car door.

"I'll come with…" Tanya—the blonde, whoever grasped my hand.

"I'm okay." I let her go.

"Dude, how many bedrooms you got in there?" Riley asked. "Save me a hotel fee," he laughed.

"Three," I slurred, leaving the car. "You can use one." Doubt he heard me.

"We're coming in. Close the door."

Following his instructions, I did as he said, stepping up onto the curb while Riley pulled in behind my car. Then, one by one, they left his whip.

Tanya sidled up to me, placed my arm over her shoulders. "You gonna give me a tour?"

I pursed my lips, thinking I'd probably pass out as soon as I got inside. "Nope."

She giggled. "At least show me your bedroom?" She palmed my dick.

I gazed down to her—thinking I could hit her off and never see her again. She could be…a palate cleanser, someone I could fuck and get it outta my system. "You-you can't sleep here," I said, not wanting anyone to see her leave here in the light of day. She was okay-looking—skinny with long legs and a big rack. No ass. Decent face.

"Who said anything about sleeping…?" She played with my collar, trying to pull me down to her face, but I didn't want to kiss her. I'd fuck her and try to get away with it—not kissing her.

She carried herself like some ho . . . looked like a ho, and if it walks like a duck, and talks like a duck…

"You tired?" she asked.

"No," I lied.

"Vicky….you tired?" she shouted out to the redhead.

Vicky was sucking on Riley's face.

My buddy pulled away from her. "Open the door already."

I chuckled, rapidly stumbling along with Tanya as I dug my keys out of my pocket.

Entering the house, I knocked over the potted plant Esme gave me to liven up the place.

I laughed my ass off, turning on the light and staring down at the dirt. "Damn," I muttered.

"Hope you weren't too attached," Tanya laughed. "Who's that? Oh…" she laughed through her nose.

"What?" I asked.

"Edward?" Bella whispered. "Tanya…?" Her voice got louder.

I jumped away from the blonde—whoever she was.


	62. Chapter 62

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Two**

**_S_**_he_ was on my couch.

Bella was in my living room with tear-stained cheeks, wearing her Winnie the Pooh pajamas. "I—I—" she left her mouth open, at a loss for words.

Riley pushed us farther into the foyer. "What's the problem?"

I didn't know what to say either, but I bounced back quickly. "We came back for a few beers…" Then I remembered Bella wasn't my girlfriend, and anger filled my gut. "What are you doing here?"

"I know, right?" Tanya laughed, placing her hand on her hip. "You know her? That scrub bitch probably broke in. She sponges off my cousin—"

"Shut your fucking mouth." I pointed to her but wondered who her cousin was.

"Oh, no. You can't talk to me like that—"

Not giving a fuck who Tanya was, I grasped her arm and pushed her back into Rye and Vicky. "Get out…fucking mouthy cooz." She was giving me the only headache, and the situation had ruined my buzz. Meanwhile, belligerent and intoxicated, I had to peek over my shoulder, make sure Bella was there—not a figment of my imagination.

"Dude…we'll go," Riley said, pulling Tanya away. "Handle that…talk, _open_ your mouth." He stared back at Bella.

I nodded, massaging my forehead.

"No . . . I'll go." Bella grabbed her sweater. "I need, need to go home," she sobbed.

"No!" I was quick to say. "You stay." I turned to give Riley a fist pound as he ushered those hoes outta my house.

"Have a good night, B!" Riley waved to Bella.

When they were gone, I slammed the door closed and double-locked it. "Bella—"

She was in front of me. "I wanna go home."

"Please—"

"Please, let me go." She reached around me.

I blocked the door. "Go sit. You're not leaving."

She kept her head down, going back over to the couch. "No!" Bella suddenly shouted, whipping around to face me. "You came home with—with Tanya…?"

"That's her name?" I asked, walking toward her.

"Tanya's Rosalie's cousin…and I never sponge of off anyone." She cried into her hands. "Tanya…she's pretty and blonde. I get it…I'm just some scrub. Trust me; Tanya let's me know every chance she has—"

"Stop!" I put my palm up. "Just stop." Bella feeling sorry for herself bothered me. "You're not, nor have you ever been a fucking scrub, and next time you see her...I hope you smack her in the fucking mouth, but not because of me." I scoffed. "And it's not that I feel the need to defend myself—" since I honestly didn't think I needed to "—but I didn't know her name. We came back for beers—whatever." I shrugged. "I didn't even kiss her or anything."

"You swear…?"

"What the fuck do you care? You're out—doing you, doing whatever." I needed to calm down. "Just—"

"There's been no one since you," she said. "No one, Edward. I swear. I don't want anyone else."

"Uh…there's been no one else since you…too. I kept my word…while I lived with you, but I don't live with you anymore." I didn't know what else to say, the shock wearing off and the alcohol affecting me again. Dizzy, I thought I should sit down. "I'm doing my best to move on."

Bella was quiet but she'd stopped crying.

"Okay…?"

She sniffled, nodding her head. "I believe you."

"How'd you get in?" I asked.

"You gave Jasper a spare key," she whispered.

"No, I did-didn't." I slurred, walking over to my recliner to sit down.

"You did," she insisted.

I shrugged, not giving a fuck how she got in. "Are you okay? Nothing happened…but have you _been_ okay…? What's up?" I wondered why she was here.

She nodded. "I think so."

"What happened, Bella?" I leaned toward her. "We—"

"It's not another guy," she said. "But it is…someone, another person."

I lit a cigarette, my eyes widening in mock surprise. "Glad we've established that. If you haven't noticed, I'm fucked up right now. Don't speak in riddles," I laughed, feeling the best I had in ages again, even if the sight of her was bittersweet. All my adult life, I never drank as much I had tonight. Now, I could see the appeal of getting drunk. The booze did make me feel better.

Her presence alone, plus my intoxication . . . it made me happy for reasons I couldn't explain. Maybe it was just her…now that the others had left and we'd cleared the air a bit.

She left the sofa to come toward me. Bella handed me an ashtray and then turned to the couch again.

I pulled her onto my lap since she was too close not to touch.

"Edward—" She tried to get up.

"No." I squeezed her. "I forgot how beautiful…" I was dumbfounded, having her here, getting to see her again. All those times she slept next to me I took her for granted. "I should—should have spent more time with you, instead of working." I pushed her hair away from her face.

Bella frowned. "Your cigarette is by my hair." She moved away. "Please…let me go back over there. I won't leave. Just…I mean, we can talk without me sitting here—"

"No." I didn't let her go. "Listen to me for a second—"

"Maybe we should talk tomorrow." She made to get up, looking fearful. "You're drunk."

"No, I'm fine," I disagreed. "Just listen. Okay?"

She nodded, sitting still.

"Thank you," I said. "Maybe—maybe I should have asked you out sooner, before you met…whoever."

"Edward—"

"Let me finish!" I groaned.

She was startled but composed herself. Bella closed her eyes, nodding.

"I didn't know. I thought—I thought I was giving you time to heal? I thought since you didn't go for the dick, you didn't want me. But maybe…maybe you only wanted sex that one night. Maybe you only need, wanted a friend, and I'm glad to be your friend—no, maybe you played me. And—and I'm okay with that. I let it all go to my head."

I was exhausted after getting all that out. "I was so focused on taking care of you, I neglected to take care of other things, whatever. It's my fault. You're so young, and I'm the asshole for burdening you with my bullshit needs—even if what I need is you." I leaned into her, her lips so close. I'd barely brushed them with my own when she moved away from me.

"Edward—"

I cut her off with my lips, kissing her deeply, tangling my tongue with hers. My hands roamed up her sides. They squeezed her breasts, still going up to weave my fingers into her hair, my hips leaving the chair to push against her, needing her to feel what she does to me...

Bella wasn't kissing me back.

When I pulled away, she was crying and shaking.

"Baby—" I palmed her cheek, out of breath.

"I'm sorry for, for this." She shook her head, pointing to her tears. "I'm fine. I'm sorry for . . . We can—we _can_."

But she didn't want to.

"No, my God." I hugged her gently. "I'm sorry. I'm such an asshole," I repeated. "But—"

"It's okay." She blew out a breath. "You can have me, if you want. I know men…I mean, if you haven't since…you do have needs." She wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry for fighting you. I was…just surprised. We can—"

"We can't," I whispered, wondering if she even thought my behavior wrong. Drunk or not . . . in love with her or not, she had my respect. She had my heart. Problems and miscommunications aside, I might have ruined any chance I had. I might have ruined any progress she's made.

"You should-should go. I'll walk you home." Truth be told, I was about to cry.

"No…it's okay."

"I'm so sorry, baby." I felt like a monster. Others, many around the neighborhood see me as such—someone to fear—but not Bella, never my Bella-Boo. _She_ couldn't see me like that. She seems like the only one who doesn't. Now she might.

For the first time, I hated the person I'd become.

"You're not an asshole," she said. "I-I do want to be with you, but not like this . . . and we should talk before we, you know. Right now, though—" her voice was stronger "—you should go to bed. We can talk tomorrow." She made to get up. "I'll help you."

"Then…I can't walk you home." I nodded, letting out another burp. "I—I don't have sheets yet, but I have a blanket and a pillow that we can share. Unless…I can sleep on the couch."

She giggled and it was the best sound in the world, made me smile.

"I miss you," I said.

"I miss you, too." She hugged me around the neck.


	63. Chapter 63

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Three**

**_I_**n the morning, I had the worst headache ever, and I wondered who'd poured my drinks last night.

It also took me a minute to figure out where I was, and then I remembered I moved into my old house.

_Fuck._

And Bella was in my bed.

Bella was in my bed.

In my bed . . .

"Yo," I whispered, nudging her awake.

She smiled at me. "Hey."

I cleared my throat. "Did we…?"

"No," she giggled, and I realized we were fully clothed.

"Thank God." If we'd had sex again, I'd want to remember that shit. Then again, I was so trashed, I bet I wouldn't have been able to get it up. "What happened?"

"You came home with Tanya and Riley . . . I was here waiting for you." She ran her nails along my scalp, and I collapsed back, my head landing in her lap.

"What the fuck?" I asked no one in particular. "Wait…who? Who did I come home with?" I tried to think back, which actually hurt my head, and the foggy vision of some loudmouth skank entered my mind.

Bella was here when I got home. Riley drove…he was gonna get it in with some redhead and her friend.

"I didn't—"

"No, you kicked them out…and _we_ talked," Bella whispered. "I don't know what you did before that, though."

"I did nothing." I cleared my throat, sitting up to find a cigarette.

"Want me to run home? Grab you some Advil?"

"No." I rasped, lighting up a smoke.

While I'd appreciate the medicine, I didn't want her to leave.

I wanted answers.

"Don't'chu have a man or something now?" I asked, scratching my head, still confused.

"No! I told you last night."

"Please, don't get loud," I begged.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, coming over to rub my temples. "I told you last night. You don't remember…anything?"

I didn't reply, trying to think back again. "Then…what happened?" I asked. "That day on your stoop—"

"I don't know." By her tone alone, I had a feeling she was lying. "I got scared—I didn't want you to move out. I didn't know how to talk to you."

"I just don't understand," I admitted. "You said I changed, but _you _changed. And I know you went to hell and back . . . but now I realize. Bella, I'd rather have you as my friend than nothing at all. So, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel uncomfortable."

At the end of the day, that's all it boiled down to, and I didn't care if I sounded like a pussy—speaking of my feelings being so foreign. I'd never done it before, but now . . . with Bella, I didn't care.

I've been torturing myself for too long, but what did I expect? I never opened my fucking mouth or voiced a damn thing. How was she supposed to know that I was interested? When I had told her no a few times to boot? And so, her moving on…me letting her get away was no one's fault but my own.

Other things, making a name for myself was more important.

I fucked myself and I didn't even get to enjoy it.

"No, you…you changed. You became so rough and tough, and…I saw things in you I used to see in someone else. But…I still…and last night you scared me—"

I put the cigarette out, blowing my smoke into the air. "Scared you?" I rolled onto my stomach to face her. "When have I ever given you a reason to fear me?" I thought her words were total bullshit.

But then I remembered . . . touched my lips as if her kiss was burned there.

She sighed. "You're intense sometimes. You lose your temper all the time. Last night, you—" she shook her head "Nothing happened, I mean—"

"I remember," I whispered. "I'm sorry." I grasped her hand. "I'm—"

"I'm scared of how you'll react to things." She cut me off, taking her hand back.

"How so?" I raised a brow. "Bella, talk to me. What happened to you? You—you, Bella, you used to be…tough. You'd speak your mind. You'd be aggressive and go for things, regardless of that animal was doing to you. Now he's gone, and you could—but now…?" I spluttered, at a loss.

Bella was just the shell of the chick I used to know, and Jake was gone, dead, he'd literally disappeared. She once stated that she had her freedom, yet she was pissing it away?

"When it was just you and me, I didn't see a reason for me to be like that—with the attitude and the defense mechanisms—whatever."

"I can understand that." I grinned. "Thank you." That meant she had her guard down around me. She trusted me.

"I kept thinking…After what happened? Maybe it would've never happened if I…carried myself differently," she said.

"But you stopped doing everything. Just because I'm busy, have work to do, doesn't mean you have to stay home, stop living." Even if I didn't like it, was jealous of the time she'd be away from me—chillin' with her friends, babysitting—weeks ago she stopped doing everything.

Then I left . . .

"You have nothing to fear—not anymore."

"I do." She nodded, her eyes widening. Bella was holding something back.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked.

She covered her face with her hands.

I sat up to make her look at me. "Don't cry. There's no reason for it."

"I can't help it." She sobbed.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" I threw my hands up, exasperated. "You know what? You burned me real good. This is what I get for getting mixed up with a teenager—body like a woman, mind like a child."

"Fuck you!"

I nodded, smiling because I caught a glimpse of the Bella I met three months ago. "That's it. Lemme have it."

"You wanna know why I'm like this?" She left my bed, a blubbering mess.

"Why?" I asked.

She opened her mouth but nothing came out.

"Just go." I gestured to the door, thinking I should have cut my losses a long time ago. "You know what? It's my bad for thinking we had something." I shrugged, leaving the bed. "You got me good. First you wanted something, while I was on the fence. That shit popped off, and then I wanted something, and now _you're_ on the fence. Let's do each other a favor here, all right?"

"I hate you!" She stomped her foot.

"You're such a fucking baby!" I shouted, cringing 'cause my head was pounding. "Jesus Christ! I should have listened to Jazz when he told me to stay away from you." I wanted to kick my own ass.

She groaned through gritted teeth, waving her fist at me.

"Take your best-fucking-shot." I pointed to my chin, wanting her to punch me, get some balls back. "Free shot. I swear to Christ, I won't touch you. Hit me!" I shouted.

With any luck, she'd knock me out.

Instead, Bella turned for the door . . .

She left my bedroom with her head down…

But I couldn't fucking let her go.

"Stop!" I sprinted after her. Bella had a head start, had run downstairs quickly.

"Don't!" I kept my eyes almost closed when she managed to open the front door an inch. "Just—"

"I don't know what happened." She nearly collapsed into my arms, and the tears were back.

I nodded, trying to ignore them, as I ushered her into the living room. But…I also remembered what she'd said. She'd just started talking to me, and I flipped the fuck out. I needed to relax because the last thing I wanted to do was scare her. "Shhh."

"I don't know how this could happen—" And then she threw up on my floor.


	64. Chapter 64

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement was intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Four**

**_A_**fter cleaning my floor, I got back into bed with Bella. I'd sent her there while I got busy with the paper towels and the Windex 'cause that's all the cleaning supplies I had. The tiles were nice and shiny, though. "You're good?"

She nodded, looking sheepish. "I'm sorry."

I waved a hand. "Don't—let's get back to . . ." I gestured for her to continue. And I couldn't believe I was still encouraging her, that I still couldn't let her go. She is a baby, barely fucking nineteen, and I was four years older—a man. We were on two totally different wavelengths maturity-wise.

What did I expect?

What was my obsession with her?

"When we met up again, you only wanted to fuck me?" I asked.

"No, I was crazy about you. I wanted you to be my man, but I was confused because of Jake. But then I realized, he didn't matter. Nothing mattered, not even the trouble us being together would cause. You did, you mattered. I'd wanted to dump Jake for…almost the whole time we were together." She gripped my biceps tightly, her body stiffening. "He raped me!" she shouted.

I nodded, my stomach hitting the floor, although I was glad she finally said it. I was ecstatic in a way because she'd finally realized what he'd done.

It wasn't sex.

It wasn't what she'd thought it was.

"He raped me," she whispered. "The first time…times after. He—I didn't want to. I never did. He always forced me, and I couldn't get away."

"I know." I wiped her tears away. "Keep talking to me, baby."

She nodded, swallowing her tears. "I never wanted him, but that's besides the point. You came back…I only want you….you saved me!" She rushed out. "Even when I was little, I had a crush on you…It seems so silly now." She rubbed her stomach.

"It's okay?" I pointed to her belly. "I'll see if I got a bucket—"

She stopped me from leaving the bed. "I'm okay. Sorry."

I ignored that, getting back down to business. "That shit happened." I nodded. "Then we got so close. Yet you acted like you didn't want...me that way." The conversation had taken a turn, and I didn't know where to go from here, but we had to finish our talk. "After what you'd been through—"

"Are you kidding? I've always wanted you that way." She cracked a grin, which filled me with hope. "I still do," she whispered "—which is confusing. But being with you was nothing like being with Jake. He hurt me…You," she palmed my cheek, "my body, my mind…everything that is me wants you, yearns for you. For so long, I thought there was something wrong with me. But it wasn't me. It was what Jake was doing, torturing me. And you gave me so much. You showed me what passion and pleasure was." Her eyes fell to her lap. "I don't know how to explain it all. I just know I need you, Edward."

Hearing that made me weak almost. "You're all I think about." Puke breath be damned, I leaned into her. "Go out with me? Lemme take you out. Let's start over. Okay…? I respect you. I won't drink…get fresh, or do you wrong. You know? I really am sorry about last night. I'm sorry for it all, for hurting and scaring you. Baby, I'm not him. You said that once, so you don't gotta be scared of me. I'd never do anything you didn't want me to."

"You're _not_ him. You're nothing like him." Her voice held some conviction.

"Can we, can we start over? If you—"

"You mean that?" She leaned into my hand.

"Yes!" I was exhausted when I slumped back against the pillow. "I was confused…When I had the chance, I didn't know what to do with it. Then we-we got into this thing. Like a rut?" I scrunched my nose.

She shrugged, staring at me.

"Come on. It wasn't hard sleeping in the same bed as me, night after night?" I quirked a brow.

She shook her head. "I wanted you to take me seriously. I mean, if you act like a whore, you'll get treated like one." She wouldn't meet my gaze. "Maybe if I didn't…none of that would have happened to me. Jake wouldn't have—"

"Who said that to you?" I lifted her chin. "Tell me." Someone must have told her that. It didn't sound like something she'd just say, and it'd explain why she changed so dramatically. "Tell me."

She refused. "It's not important—"

That shit pissed me off. "Bella, tell me."

"No! Because you'll hurt them. Do you know what people are saying about you?" She flew from my bed. "At first, I didn't see it. Now…now I do."

I stiffened. "Bella—"

"None of it matters, though. I still can't help the way I feel about you," she said. "Maybe I'm stupid…because I believe you'd never hurt _me_." She pointed to herself.

"Never—"

"Not physically…like Jake did."

I shook my head. "Bella-Boo, I hope to never hurt you in _any_ way—"

Suddenly, we heard a crash, and my body reacted before my mind had time to process. I pretty much tackled Bella, keeping her down. "Don't move," I warned.

Bella stayed down, covering her head, and scooting to get under the bed.

I haven't exactly made any enemies yet. Well, all those people are dead 'cause I've clipped them.

Surprised, I peeked out the window.

"Come out, fuck-face!" It was Jasper, and he was taking a bat to my car.

At first, I was relieved, but then . . .

"What the fuck?" I jumped up, running out of my bedroom, down the stairs, going for my front door.

"What's happening?" Bella ran after me. "That sounded like Jasper."

"It _is_ Jasper." I didn't know what was up, but I didn't want her to leave.

Having no idea what Jasper's problem was, I pointed back to my bedroom. "Go—wait for me, and don't come out."

"Edward, it's just Jasper—" She went to walk around me. "Oh, man…I snuck out. I didn't—didn't even call or anything."

I stopped her. "Please...go wait in the bedroom." I had this fear that he'd take her away from me, and that's the only thought I had. "I'll be right back." I grabbed my heat from the coffee table.

"No!" Bella reached for it. "It's Jasper!"

"You're right." I let her have it. "But get inside."

She didn't move, staring at me, and that's when I heard a loud crash—a bigger boom.

Running outside, I saw what it was. Jasper had smashed my windshield in.

"What the fuck?" I shouted, widening my arms.

Jasper raised the bat, getting the other headlight. "You fuckin' prick!" My rearview mirror fell off.

"Jazz!"

"I let you live in my house, and how do you repay me…?" He continued to hit at my car windows.

"Whoa!" Seconds away from losing my temper, I walked out to him. "What the fuck, bro?"

"I'm not your fuckin' bro!" He took a swing at me.

Unfortunately for him, I was able to grab the bat and throw it out into the street. "Talk to me—"

He cut me off, bopping me in my jaw, and I saw red.

Slamming him against my car, I landed blow after blow in his ribs—then I went for his face. He got me a few times, too, and then we rolled around on the ground.

"Cut it out!" I heard Bella shout.

Neither of us deterred, Jasper groaned, punching me in my stomach. He had some pair and some strength for a scrawny dude.

I pulled him up to his feet, using my forearm to block his airway as I slammed him into a parked car by the curb. "The fuck's your problem?"

Jasper gritted his teeth, kneeing me in the junk.

"Pussy!" I coughed, yet I still had him, and that's when I let loose.

We got back down to the concrete, and I heard the crunch of his nose . . .

"Knock it off!" Bella shrieked. "He's hurt—"

I ignored her, landing an uppercut on my supposed best friend.

"Edward! Lay off!" She pulled me by my shoulders, beat at my back.

"Go inside!" I shouted, grasping Jazz by the collar of his shirt.

"Get off him! I mean it!"

When I felt the barrel of my gun just under my ear, I let go of Jazz to face Bella.


	65. Chapter 65

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Five**

"You'd shoot me?" Finding it comical, I advanced toward Bella, Jasper forgotten.

Bella licked her dry lips, her stance weak. Her hands were shaking, and there was anguish in her eyes.

"Gimme that." I snatched it from her, and then she ran around me to help Jasper stand. "He's fine." Sucking my teeth, I surveyed the damage to my car.

"You're a fucking animal!" Bella shouted. "What the hell's wrong with you?"

"He comes to _my_ house—destroys _my_ fucking car—and _I'm_ the animal?!" I shrugged, at a loss. "Where's he get the balls to come at me like that? Huh?! _He's_ wrong!"

No matter what truths I spoke, Bella stared daggers at me.

"I'm fine." Jasper nudged her away.

"The fuck's your problem, man?" I asked him again.

Jasper licked his bloody lip, wiping at his even bloodier nose. "You—you're my fuckin' problem."

Again, I widened my arms as to say, how so?

"You did what you did and then you bounced…?" He kept his voice down, coming toward me.

"Whoa…what'd I do? And bounced? I'm down the fucking block for fuck's sake—"

Bella gasped. "Jasper, no!" She flew at her brother. "Please, don't!"

"Go home, B." He pushed her away and she almost lost her footing.

Brother or not, he'd pay for that. "Get in the house," I told her, pointing behind me.

"Look at you—barkin' orders and shit," Jasper laughed. "Bella, go home…_our_ home. Now!"

She looked like she didn't know what to do.

"Get inside, Bella." I jerked my head toward my crib, stepping closer to Jasper. "Listen to me—" my chest was nearly touching his "—you got beef with me, fine. Don't touch her like that."

"Like what?" He pushed me.

I went for him again, but she tried to get between us.

Facing Bella, I grasped her arm and pulled her toward the house. "Get inside—watch the glass," I told her.

"Edward…?" She jerked out of my hold.

I put my palms up. "Relax. It'll be all right." I was still panting, trying to soothe her. "Whatever he's upset about—"

"No." She held my hands. "He's crazy…Jasper's…crazy," she cried, looking behind us. "Don't listen to him. I—"

I blocked her, keeping her behind me as I turned to Jasper. "What's your deal?"

That motherfucker—while my back was turned—had run into the street to grab his bat.

I chuckled. "Check you out." There was no way I'd back down now. "Can you save us some time, tell me what I did?"

"You got her pregnant!" He gritted his teeth, taking another swing, and I hopped back. "You swore you didn't—hadn't and wouldn't touch her!"

"Jazz—" I put my hands out to block the bat, as my attention was pulled in ten different directions. "Wait…What? I, what?"

"You knock her up and then you just leave her? Real scumbag move, Eddie. And I thought I had your word!" He got my car again before he raised the bat to me. "She's only nineteen! You bastard!"

"Whoa!" I put my hands up, thinking I was going to be sick, turning to look at Bella. "I, what?"

Bella just sobbed into her hands.

"Baby…" I went to soothe her again—Bella's tears being my Kryptonite—and that's when it went black.

I got my wish, was knocked the fuck out.


	66. Chapter 66

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Six**

**_B_**eing greeted by a bright light, I cringed, winced, and groaned.

I knew I wasn't dead.

It wasn't _that_ white light.

And if this were heaven—although I think I'd certainly go to hell—I wouldn't be in this much pain.

And there'd be twenty big-titted women doing some nasty shit to each other.

Or . . . _I just wouldn't be in this amount of pain._

"Fuck." I cradled my head, my vision blurry.

"Edward?" It was Bella. "Are you okay?"

I covered my face, hearing the beeping of a monitor. That's when I hopped up, only to collapse down.

It became obvious to me that I was in the emergency room.

"What—what happened?" I asked.

"Um…with what?" she asked, but I hadn't forgotten about . . . anything. "You were awake before…they did a head scan, gave you something for pain."

"It didn't work," I whispered. "It still hurts."

"You went back to sleep . . . We're waiting for the doctor." Surprisingly, maybe I did forget something? I mean, to my knowledge, I was just waking up now.

"Jazz knocked me out?"

"Yeah," she whispered. "He's got a concussion, too, actually. A broken nose, and he sprained his wrist . . . has bruised ribs. He's in a lot of pain . . . After Jazz hit you, I tried waking you up, but…you didn't, and I got scared. When the ambulance came, they took him in too. The cops—" she blew out a breath "—they're waiting to take your statement."

I rolled my eyes, and even that hurt. "I'm not talkin' to cops."

It got quiet, only the beeping of my heart monitor sounding in the room. Bella didn't say anything else, and . . . I remembered what Jasper said.

I had all these questions.

I think being in so much pain helped mask the fear—the shock, the worries, every-fucking-thing that came with what Jasper said.

"You're pregnant?" I asked.

She nodded.

I cleared my throat before I asked, "It's mine?"

"Yeah…I'm about ten weeks." Her voice was stronger; Bella wasn't crying, and I thought she'd deck me—hospital bed or not—for asking that last question. "You're the-the only person I've been with since—for a long time. And we didn't use anything. When I was with . . . he always wore a condom. But I hadn't been with him in…a while, and then we—you know."

I nodded, letting it soak in. "Why—why did I hear—learn about it from Jasper?"

She gritted her teeth. "I'm gonna kill Alice—"

"Whoa!" I sat up. "Kill Alice? You weren't gonna tell me?" Angry, feeling my pulse getting louder in my ears, I blew out a calming breath.

"I didn't—I wasn't gonna burden you with it. You know? I-I-I was gonna borrow money from Alice."

"You're getting rid of it?" I asked.

"I just turned nineteen. I don't know what I want," she cried

"How long have you known?"

"About a month, and…I'm sorry. I'm a pathetic coward." She snorted, looking away from me. "I should have told you. I was just so scared—"

"Shhh…come here." I pulled her into my side and she lay in the bed with me. "You're none of those things. Don't say that shit." I kissed her hair.

"You hate me."

"Like that's possible," I scoffed. "I've tried hating you…I can't. It doesn't work."

"You're too calm." She sniffled.

I had no thoughts about that—nothing. It came as another blow, but my head was too foggy to think much. "My head's killin' me."

"I thought I'd do it…and now you're talking about starting over." She gripped my hospital gown, something she's always done—fist my shirt, like she was afraid I'd leave. Every night we'd shared a bed, she'd hold on. "I can still do it, and we can start over?"

I didn't nod, didn't move. "Don't do anything. Just—lemme get the fuck outta hea first. We'll talk—get to the bottom of shit." I went to sit up again and felt woozy. Shaking it off, I massaged my forehead. "We'll talk. Okay? Don't do nothing yet."

"It's not like a McDonald's drive-thru."

"Right." I swung my legs over the side of the bed, and that's when a cop came from around the curtain.

"Edward Masino?"

"Who wants to know?" I asked.

"Look, don't make my job any more difficult." He was jotting down notes on a pad. "You pressin' charges or not? Witnesses say Mr. Cigno assaulted you."

"No," I said. "He didn't."

He nodded, pursing his lips. "And what happened to your car?"

I shrugged. "It was like that when I woke up. I didn't see nothin'."

"Right…take care." He left us.

I slumped my shoulders, massaging my temple. "Can you get a doctor or a nurse—somebody? Please, baby." I groaned, my head still pounding away. "I wanna leave and then we can talk."

"Edward…?"

I squinted my eyes, turning to look up at Bella.

What she did next surprised the fuck outta me. When she leaned into me, I didn't dare move. Her lips were soft and gentle against mine, and then she pulled away to come back—peck me once more. "I'm sorry you're hurt." She rubbed my cheek, searching my eyes.

I licked my lips, grasping her chin. "Don't worry about it." I kissed her, and it went straight to my cock—concussion be dammed. "Hmm." I had to go back for more.


	67. Chapter 67

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Seven**

She grinned. "I was so scared. I didn't—I thought I'd lose you for real."

"No," I whispered, my hands holding her waist. "I thought—so much shit went through my head."

"It's always been you, Edward."

Smiling wide, I rested my head to her chest, content to hold her. She was warm and fit just right against me . . .

Maybe her being pregnant came from left field—I wasn't expecting it—but having Bella with me, having another chance to be with her, had me so happy that I didn't care about my head, or anything else.

At my insistence, I was discharged against medical advice—told to treat my headache with Advil and Tylenol—and I was given instructions on how to care for a concussion. Apparently, I was to rest but be woken up every few hours. If my headache got any worse, I had to come back.

Knowing I'd be fine, I let them wheel me out in a chair, and then looked for my cigarettes once I was on my feet. "Where's my shit?" Last night, I never undressed, so I was still fully clothed.

"I locked up your house. That's it." She shrugged, sneaking her hand into my own. "Your gun—it's on your coffee table." She went to rummage through her purse. "I think your cigarettes were upstairs. You didn't have them…I have your keys, cell, and wallet, though." She went to hand my phone to me.

"Just hold it." I nodded, stopping her. "Did'ju call a cab?" We were streets away from our block, and there was no way we were walking.

"Um…" She turned away from me.

I looked to see what caught her eye and saw Jasper being wheeled out. Alice was with him. As soon as her gaze settled on me, she waved her fist and stalked toward me. "You motherfucker!"

"Easy!" I scolded before Alice punched me in the stomach.

"Bitch!" Bella fucking bopped her one, and then the two girls got into it—going for the other's hair and shit.

"Fuck!" With a quick swoop, I snatched Bella away and out of the scuffle, keeping my back to Alice. "You okay?" I looked her over while Alice hit at my back. "Cool it, you!"

Alice stopped hitting me.

"What was that?" I asked Bella.

She had fire in her eyes. "She hit you…I snapped. Fuckin' sue me!"

I shook my aching head. "Fuckin' broads, man!"

It was Bella's turn to hit me; she elbowed me in my side.

"Hey!" I hollered, shocked that she'd do that.

"I'm sorry." And the tears started.

I groaned, holding my forehead.

"See?" She pointed to her face. "I can't help it. I don't know why I'm crying. I can be honest with you now. I just don't know." Her lip quivered. "I'm pregnant. It's the hormones…and things are always crap!"

_Adorable._

Bella was too fucking cute for words.

"It's okay." I palmed her cheeks and kissed her hair. "Just relax."

"Jasper!" Alice shouted.

We turned to her and then to Jazz. He was walking toward us while he ignored his girlfriend. When she grabbed for him, he pulled his arm away. "She's fucking pregnant. And you put your hands on her?" he asked Alice.

"Uh—" I wanted to bring up something else I hadn't forgotten, about how he pushed her just hours prior.

"Jazz!" Alice whined.

"You okay?" He went for Bella, knocking me out of the way.

"Yo…!" I placed my arms around her.

Jasper pushed me. "You did enough." He looked back to Bella. "Let's just go home."

"No," I said. "We gotta talk. She's coming back to my place."

"I don't think so." He went to usher her away.

I grasped her hand, pulling her back.

Bella screamed, stiffening on the sidewalk. "Stop!"

"Skee-ooo!" Riley shouted, stopping short. "What's good, you hoodlums?" he laughed his ass off, leaving his car.

"Take me home!" Alice demanded, getting in the back of his whip.

He gave her a quick glance, but came over to us. "You all right?"

I slapped my hand to his. "Who called you?"

"This one." He jerked his head to Bella. "Said youse needed a ride."

"Thanks. You gotta cigarette?" I asked.

"Bet." He handed me his pack and lighter. "I saw your car," he whistled. "Good job," he told Jazz, smirking. "We ready to go?"

I pulled on the smoke, instantly calming; meanwhile, my head pounded away a little more. "Yeah." Placing my arm over Bella, I brought us over to Riley's car.

"I'm not riding in the car with her!" Alice shouted.

I opened the door for Bella. "Move over," I told Alice, and she did as I said.

By the time we got back to the 'hood, the girls had settled their differences. I couldn't say the same for Jasper and me. It looked as though he wasn't speaking to Alice or me. And I didn't understand it. He fucking comes to my house, swinging a fucking bat . . . fucks my shit up, and yet he's holding the grudge?

Whatever the fuck his problem was I left him to it.

Regardless of their argument, Alice followed Jasper to his house.

Bella stayed on the sidewalk after Riley drove off.

"You comin' inside?" I asked, hoping she would.

"I should go talk to Jasper." She stared after her brother.

Exasperated, needing my bed, I hung my head. "Right…" I felt like we'd gotten somewhere, but maybe we didn't. "Just come by later or something." I turned for my door. Hopefully, by the time _later_ comes, I'll have thought some shit through.

"No…wait. I'll stay." Bella flew at me to hug me tight. "I'll stay. I'm here. Don't be mad."

I clamped my eyes closed, cringing. "Go talk to Jazz. It's fine." I kissed her hair. "I'm not mad."

"No."

Careful to avoid all the glass, we entered my house.

**These crazy kids . . .**

**Thank you for reading!**

**Please leave me your thoughts. **


	68. Chapter 68

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Eight**

**_T_**here were loads of things we needed to discuss. Many decisions needed to be made, but I was chill—happy to have Bella here, in my arms and in my bed.

"Later, I'll go home and bring some stuff back for you—another blanket, some more pillows, sheets, and towels . . . I'll get you the Advil, too—"

I ran my thumb over her soft lips, marveling at how beautiful she was. "Don't worry about it."

She grinned down to me, placing her hand over mine.

"You're my girl?" I asked, just to establish that from jump.

"I've always been." She kissed me again, and I could get used to that.

While we've yet to use tongues or get down to business, the short nips she'd grant me were more than enough.

My hand spanned her cheek, my fingers brushing her hair back.

"I'll get some coffee, too."

I sighed. "I need all that stuff. I don't have a coffeemaker, but I got furniture and a microwave—whatever." And talking about such inane garbage helped us to ignore the elephant in the room. I was glad that Bella played along. Especially since I wasn't sure if I was ready to have the heavy discussion that was sure to come.

Her eyes widened. "When you're feeling better, can we take a ride to Walmart? I've only ever been there once, and I'll help you get everything. I know what you'll need to stock a kitchen—"

I laughed, agreeing. It may sound odd, but those big, superstores aren't common around New York City. I remember being surprised the first time I went to a Kmart out in Washington.

Around here, you usually have to travel to find one. They're out in the cut. "Definitely. I never had my own place before, and you took such good care of me." It was true. Since I'd left Jasper's, I've been winging it—eating out or with the guys, taking pizza from Sal's so I'd have something to munch on later.

"I missed you so much." She nuzzled her face into my chest.

I smiled, hugging her close to kiss her hair. "I missed you, too, Bella-Boo."

"Eddie Spaghetti," she yawned, grasping my shirt.

Bella managed to fall asleep.

While I should have felt out of it because of my head, I was wide awake.

My mind wandered for a good hour, coming back around to one thing.

She's pregnant.

_Pregnant._

_Pregnant._

_Knocked up._

_Knocked up wit' my-fucking-kid._

Quickly, I ran out from under Bella to be violently ill into the toilet.

All the drinks I had last night, the bullshit this morning, the news I'd been given, and my aching head all caught up to me.

"Oh." Bella held my shoulders. "I'm gonna go get the Advil now. Your head must be—"

I stopped her, grabbing her hand before she left the bathroom, but I couldn't speak yet.

"Just stay here. I'll be right back." She ran from me and out of the house, I heard the door close.

I groaned, flushing the toilet before I slumped low to the floor.

"Fuck." The weight of the world was back on my shoulders.

Needing to clean myself up, I took a quick shower.

My mind still went away from me, worry, anxiety, worried about what Bella might do.

What did she want?

What did _I_ want?

I knew I wanted her . . . I knew I wanted to be with Bella.

That hadn't changed.

Again, it'd taken me a hot minute to come to that, and I wasn't going back on it.

And being away from her . . . I was miserable.

By the time I left the shower to dry off, I came to the only conclusion I could.

I'd stand by Bella no matter what she decided.

That's all I could do.

"Edward?" Bella poked her head in.

I had the towel on my face. "Yeah?"

"Um…" She was looking down. "Uh—"

I was going to cover up, but then . . . "You all right?" It was cute, her staring at my dick. She was welcome to it.

_Eddie Spaghetti Jr. and the meatballs nearly smiled at her._

"Yeah, I'm okay. Are you okay?" She spoke so fast. "I have junk, I mean, stuff . . ." Bella trailed off, still staring at my cock.

When I moved the towel to dry my chest, she turned so fast she bumped her head on the door. "Fuck!"

"Shit…Are you okay?" I appraised her, holding her cheeks.

"Just—just a long—I mean, little bump. No big deal."

I nodded, leaning forward to kiss her forehead. "You'll live."

"Um, yeah." She clamped her eyes closed, blowing out a large breath. "I'll be inside."

Feeling a little better, I smiled to myself after she left. From there, and since I still live out of my duffle, I went to grab a shirt and a pair of boxers.

I was able to slip them on without dropping my towel.

"I made toast and coffee."

When I entered the kitchen, I was astonished to see she'd brought half her kitchen with her. Jasper's toaster and his coffeemaker sat on my counter.

"How'd you get all this stuff here?" I chuckled.

"My shopping cart." She pointed to her purple cart. "I wanted to make you toast to settle your belly. And coffee because…that's good for migraines, right?"

I shrugged.

"I heard that once."

"Okay." I took her hand, intertwining our fingers. "Thank you." I kissed her palm.

"That mouth . . ." she whispered.

Captivated by hers—my head emptying of any thought—I dove for those lips.


	69. Chapter 69

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Sixty-Nine**

Toast and coffee forgotten, Bella's tongue slipped into my mouth, and I sucked on it—wanting it—as I grasped her ass to lift her up onto the counter.

She moaned into my mouth, scooting closer to wrap her legs around my torso.

My hands ran up her thighs—my body on autopilot, I reached to bring her t-shirt over her head.

When her gaze caught mine and she covered her tits, I stopped. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Her face was flushed as she rubbed my cheek. "Your kisses . . . Edward."

I grinned, holding her close. "Yeah?"

"Nothing." She was holding something back again.

I hung my head, resting it in the crook of her neck, and my cock hurt—it was literally painful just to stand here, and I needed another shower.

She sighed, playing with my wet hair.

My eyes went low, focusing on her stomach that stuck out of the Pooh pants she still wore. "You're pregnant…" My finger made circles around her belly button, and I had a thought. It was very misplaced, but…could we have sex…in her condition? I had no fucking clue. It's not like they taught us this in high school, nor did they give a class while I was training to be a marine.

"Yeah," she whispered.

"And…?" I lifted my head to search her eyes. "Are you okay? Are you sick? How—" I wanted to ask how it happened. We only had sex one time, but even I'm not that stupid to think it impossible.

"My boobs hurt, and I throw up sometimes…only sometimes. Like this morning? But I'm okay."

"Good." I blew out a breath. "Have you been to a doctor?"

"Yeah, I went to Planned Parenthood. They were cheap—"

"But they're real doctors?" I asked.

She nodded, reaching for her shirt.

I helped her back into it, quickly kissing her lips when her head popped through.

"I don't know what to do."

"What do you want…? You must have some idea." I shrugged.

Bella frowned. "Soon, very soon, it's gonna be too late. I have to make a decision. You know?"

I nodded. "You let me know."

"What do you mean?" She stared at me. "What—um?" Bella swallowed, averting her gaze.

"I don't know," I said. "When you decide what you wanna do, tell me."

"Oh . . . I could do it and we'll start over, or…?" She stared at me expectantly.

"I'd like to start over…no matter what." I was scared and nauseated again. "_You_ have to decide. It's your body…you know?" I didn't know what else to say.

"But…what do you want?"

"I want us to start over. I want you, and I'll be here…for you, no matter what you decide." I nodded, thinking that was still a sound plan, and it was the right thing to do.

Hey, my father died, and my mother was a drunk. Even if I was fourteen—when he died and I went to live with her—nannys and Grandma Cigno had practically raised me, although my father had tried his best.

What the fuck did I know about babies? Having a kid?

I'm just glad I didn't grow up to be some scumbag, neurosis included. I know I gotta few quirks, trust issues and whatnot.

_I should have worn a condom._

Regardless, I was along for whatever ride, but Bella needed to make up her mind without my influence.

If she had the baby to appease me, and then she truly didn't want our kid…Fuck, maybe I am a scumbag. Because I don't wanna be left with our child if I couldn't be with Bella.

_Christ._

It was easy for my mother to leave me. She forgot all about me, was okay with me thinking her dead.

My father stepped up to the plate . . . let her go and raised me.

He always wanted me.

Then…he died.

I could die…get popped off one day, and that's something I've always been okay with. I've never been scared of death, but I didn't…I wouldn't want to leave my son…or daughter…with no one…I wouldn't want to leave Bella either.

Silence fell upon us and my cock had long shriveled back into the lonely fucker he is…with all my thinking.

"You should take the Advil." She handed me two pills.

I threw 'em back and grabbed a neglected bottle of water that'd been there since . . . I had no idea. "I have a house . . ." I pursed my lips. "I have money. I—I don't know."

For some reason—even if I'd never given the daddy-track much thought—the idea of Bella going through with the abortion . . . saddened me.

Because…if she did want the kid, but was scared of me…how I'll feel or what I'll do, having the abortion would be another blow, something she might not come back from after everything she's been through—all the loss she's already suffered.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm sorry—" I was sorry for being a lazy fucker, for not using a condom, placing her in this position.

"It's not your fault." She started to cry. "Just ignore it." She pointed to her face. "I've been an emotional wreck for weeks."

"I can't do that—ignore you." I hugged her. "Even when you were this itty-bitty thing. Jasper would tease you . . ."

"You always saved me," she whispered.

"I wouldn't go that far." I chuckled. "But I remember wanting to make you feel better."

"What do you want, Edward?"

"You." I didn't have to think about that one, not anymore. Then I remembered what she'd said earlier. "You don't have to be scared—not of me."

"I thought you'd leave or something, and then—You thought I didn't want you, which was so stupid. I-I—Edward, I'm like—practically obsessed with you. And when I was chasing you, you kept…you tried to avoid me. I was waiting for you to make a move—"

"So was I." I grinned. "I was waiting on you." I pecked those lips, holding back a groan. "I was miserable without you. I could never leave—legit leave," I said. "Not ever. And not because of this." I palmed her stomach. "You need to tell me what you want…I'm not going anywhere, so don't be afraid of that either." I didn't know how many times I'd have to say that.

She blew out a breath. "I get butterflies sometimes."

"Yeah?" I furrowed my brow. "What's that mean?"

"I don't know. I didn't ask a lot of questions. The less I know about it…the, the baby the better…I kept my eyes closed and listened to my iPod during the sonogram…I didn't get a picture either."

"Why?" I asked.

She waved a hand. "You need to know, I never lost interest. Things just got crazy. And we were right there…and then this happened." She held her gut. "All of which scared the crap outta me, and I was even more frightened to tell you. It got to the point where I was so nervous—with just being around you. 'Cause when you look at me, it's hard to lie—keep things from you."

"Don't. Don't keep anything from me." I rubbed my knuckles along her cheek. "It took me a long time—not to give a fuck about Jazz, to know what I wanted. Then it felt like, as soon as I knew, you were like, 'Fuck that douche'."

She giggled. "I don't sound like that."

I shrugged. "Regardless of what you decide, I wanna be your man. I wanna be with you, care for you, and everything else . . . we can go at your pace. You want me, you come get it. So, don't base your decision on me, or my thoughts. Don't be afraid of what I'll do…'Cause I'm not going anywhere." I pried her fingers off my shirt. "You don't gotta do that."

Maybe it was instinct, but she went for my shirt again. "You mean it?"

I nodded, kissing those lips. "You know what?"

"What?" She smiled.

"Go 'head and hold on. It's cool."


	70. Chapter 70

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy**

With everything that'd gone down, I totally forgot about meeting up with CJ.

Luckily for me, he called an hour before I had to be there.

There was a change of plans.

Also, I was supposed to drive him, and I no longer had a car.

He laughed, having heard about Jazz and me getting into it.

Instead of meeting at Gazebo, we were to go to another spot called Breaking Dawn. It was in Manhattan.

CJ was picking me up now, too.

"You look hot." Bella straightened out my collar. "You in a suit…"

I grabbed a handful of ass, groaning when I squeezed her. "Stay here. Don't go home."

She smiled. "I need a shower. I need to change outta these clothes. I feel gross." She pursed her lips, looking away from me, but then her eyes came back to me. "I'm so happy right now." Bella held my face. "I finally have you."

"And I have you . . . I have clothes, too." I quirked a brow. "I won't be out long. Just stay."

"No…I should talk to Jazz, too."

I nodded, letting her go, and I liked that she disagreed with me—even if it was something very small. Her being so agreeable, scared of my responses, made me upset.

I wasn't going to leave her.

I wasn't going to knock her around if she disagreed with me.

"I'll walk you over."

She put her shoes back on. "Okay."

Ready to go for the evening, I turned the lights off, making sure I had everything I needed, including my shit that was in Bella's purse.

As we left my crib, I winced at seeing all the glass still in my driveway.

Bypassing that shit quickly, we strolled up the block. "You have my key." It wasn't a question.

She nodded. "I do."

"When you're done, go back to my house. Hang out until I get home?"

"We should talk more." She gave my hand a squeeze, looking up to me. "You should try to think about what you want."

I guessed I could do that, but I didn't want to influence her either way.

Bella looked beautiful under the street lamp, and I dipped low to kiss her. She became overzealous, grasping my face and holding me to her, only to let me go.

She was killing me.

"You make my crotch hurt." She danced from foot-to-foot.

"I'm sorry." I didn't know how to reply to that one.

"It's a good thing." She pulled me up her stoop. "You should—I don't know. Maybe say hi to Jazz?"

I opened my mouth to protest.

"Please? Be the bigger man because I know you are?" She spoke rapidly again. "You did nothin' wrong, so don't'chu apologize. I'm just saying. You guys are best friends."

"Yeah." I gestured for her to go inside.

When we entered, I spied Jazz sitting with Alice on the couch. They were watching TV, and my buddy had a bottle of Heineken—holding it to his forehead.

He also had a bandage on his nose.

Bella cringed, turning back to me. "I didn't know _she'd_ still be here. Let's go." Maybe the girls didn't put_ all_ their problems to bed.

I turned Bella back around, giving her a nudge.

If I had to be the bigger man, Bella could be the bigger wo-man.

"Hey…" she said.

I could tell Bella was uncomfortable, but she continued on anyway.

"Why did you tell Jasper?" Her words were for Alice.

Her friend left the couch, having wide eyes. "He wanted to know what was wrong with you—why you've been so emo. Your brother wanted to admit you to a mental hospital—"

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing," Bella told me, waving a hand. "She's exaggerating."

"No, I'm not being dramatic." Alice faced me. "But I told Jasper it wasn't all about that jerk." She pointed to me.

"Watch ya fingers! And more important, watch your mouth." Bella caught an attitude, which was coming back in short waves—it had been in hiding for a while. When I met her, she was half vixen and half bitch to the outside world…anyone who wasn't Jasper and me...and possibly Jake who'd…do some shit to her.

"Ladies, can we bring the decibel level down a notch?" Jasper asked. "My fuckin' head . . . Although I'm glad to have you back, B." He sipped his beer, noticing what I did about his sister.

I agreed with him, my own dome still fucked—the medicine, the coffee, and Bella's kisses had me feeling better, though.

"What are you talking about—math?" Alice whipped to him, and she didn't understand what "decibel" meant, mistaking it for "decimal".

I tried not to laugh. Her professors at NYU must have their hands full.

"God. You're so stupid, Alice!" Bella cackled.

"What?" Alice was clueless.

"Look, can we all agree to disagree?" I asked the group. "You told Jasper. _You told Jasper._" I shrugged. "I'm glad you did, or else I would not have known. So, thank you."

"Don't thank her," Bella said.

I held her hands. "Put the claws away."

She pouted.

"Stop." I smiled, kissing her forehead.

Bella's frown turned into a grin. "Lemme be mad." She was actually _mad_ cute right now.

"No." I looked to Jasper. "I had no idea."

He refused to look at me.

"I didn't know. She didn't tell me, and…when we were together…shit was crazy," I sighed, looking back to my girl.

"Whatta you gonna do about it?" Jasper asked, narrowing his eyes.

"First of all, be easy. I can't duke it out again—at least not today." I rolled my eyes.

"Answer the question." He got to his feet. "You gonna let her have it scraped out?"

"Jasper!" Bella and Alice shouted in unison.

Alice continued. "It's Bella's choice. It's her body."

He ignored his girlfriend, waiting on me, but then his gaze came to rest on Bella. "You don't gotta do that. We can—I'll help as much as I can, B. You know? We got through rough times before…" He looked to his feet. "I just…with how fucked the past few months have been…I can't see you going through that. I know you, and I know you want this baby."

Bella let go of my hand to hug him. "Thank you. You're the best big brother ever. But…it's something Edward and I have to decide."

"I don't get to weigh in?" he asked.

"No!" we all barked at him.

He put his palms up. "I'm against it…you doing that, and I'd help you. That's all I'm saying."

I walked over to him and put my fist out for a pound. "We gonna be cool? I had no idea, and you act like I moved to Siberia. I went down the block."

"You didn't see her," he whispered. "She scared the fuck outta me. Maybe you weren't gone long, but—"

"Enough!" Bella shouted.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked her.

"Nothing. I was upset. It's no big deal." She plopped down onto the couch.

I turned back to Jazz, waiting.

He stared at his sister. "I can't believe you. Like that." Jasper snapped his fingers. "You changed so fast. Now you're happy? What, because of him? What's going on with you?" he asked.

"Nothing. Just drop it," Bella said.

"Drop what?" I was getting agitated. "Tell me…one of youse." I looked to Alice, the big mouth.

Jasper shook his head. "I don't want you to be with him." He pointed to me. "Not anymore. Not after—"

"Whoa!" I exclaimed. "Let_ her_ decide that."

"Don't make me choose," she whispered.

"'Cause you'd choose him?" Jasper shouted. "You think you love him…It's more of a sick obsession, and—"

"Jasper!" she shrieked.

"No, Edward should know, and you should hear this." He punched his palm. "Edward—being with Edward will make you happy now. But unless your feelings are genuine…Come on, Bella. He'll just be another quick fix for whatever's goin' on in that sick dome of yours—"

"Yo!" I widened my arms, not liking his tone.

Jasper pulled on his hair, turning to face me. "I don't know…maybe I'm the crazy one." He turned in a circle, his gaze landing on his sister. "You should be able to be Bella with or without Edward—function as a human being with or without him. It's unhealthy…fucking…you too." He gestured to me. "But I'm staying outta this from now on. Bella, you need me? I'm right here. Otherwise…"

I cleared my throat, at a total loss…for words and thought, as I stared at Bella.

She wouldn't look at me.

I absorbed Jasper's words, though. I had some of that obsession bullshit going on, too. What he said didn't make me doubt myself.

It just made me question…

As I stared at the beautiful girl on the couch, the one who occupied nearly every thought I had, I tried to think of what we had in common, what I liked about her the most…her characteristics.

And besides a physical need—this irrational want—I came up empty.

I dug her…her kindness, her cuteness, and even her bitchy side. I loved everything about her physically. I love that she seems to care—not only about me—but about my well-being, too. She constantly defends me, looks out for me, and her touch drives me insane.

She's a great cook.

Fuck me, her smile makes my stomach tie in knots.

That ass…

I loved caring for her, being able to take care of her. I liked that she needed me…I knew she was there for me if I needed her.

I do need her.

Okay, so I didn't come up completely empty.

"Sorry about your whip." Jasper's tone was clipped; he didn't mean that shit, but I'd take it in the interest of resolving matters.

"Sorry about your nose." I pursed my lips.

And that was it.

Nothing more needed to be said between Jazz and me.

Maybe things wouldn't go back to normal right away, but it was something.

Bella followed me on my way out.

I stomped down the steps to stare up the street. CJ wasn't there yet. "What do you think—about what Jazz said?"

"I was really upset when you left. I kinda shut down. I tried…I was just so sad 'cause I missed you." There was fear in her eyes. "But Edward—"

I cut her off with my lips because one fact remained true. "It doesn't change anything. Okay? We're gonna go on dates. We're gonna spend more time together."

"I'd love that." She smiled.

I nodded, looking down. "I'd—I'd also be with you. It wouldn't be rough. I'd support you and the baby…if you decide—"

She studied her shoes. "It's a lot to think about. You say all this now—"

"I mean it." I grabbed her hand. "Since when you doubt me?"

She rubbed her stomach. "You could pick up and leave at any given time."

"So could you…but _I_ won't. I'll be behind whatever you decide."

"You're putting this all on me—"

"Because it's your decision," I said.

"I know, but I wanna know…what you want," she whispered.

"I told you…I don't think you can base this decision on me. If I tell you what I want, you'll agree—afraid you'll lose me." I squeezed her hand.

"I'm pathetic—a child. I'm stupid." Tears filled her eyes.

"No. You're not." We'd have to work on her self-esteem, too.

Reasons…Who gave a fuck?

Over the course of months, I grew to care for her a lot—fell in love with her. It didn't make a fucking difference.

I needed to take care of my girl.

It was something I just started doing when I got here.

Then it became a habit, and now…? I couldn't imagine not being concerned, worrying, wanting to make her happy. "Yeah, you're young. My mom was nineteen when she had me. I don't know." I looked up the block again. "You think…You know what _I_ think." I pointed to myself.

"You're not telling me what you think. You're just saying you'll be along for the ride. What about everything else? Like what you really want?"

I held her hips, gazing up to her. "I told you what I want—"

"You want me."

"Exactly." I heard CJ's whip coming down the street. He stopped at Jasper's instead of strolling down to my house.

"Ali in there?" he shouted.

"Yeah. You want her?" I asked.

"Nah, I was just nosy," he laughed. "You ready?"

I nodded, turning to Bella. "I'll see you later?"

"Yeah." She bent low to kiss me before I walked out to CJ's car.


	71. Chapter 71

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-One**

Carlisle Jr. didn't waste any time.

Before I even had my seatbelt on, he started with the twenty questions.

But one stood out as he continued to drive.

"So . . . now you know. That's wassup." He nodded.

"You knew?" I asked. "You're s'posed to be my boy—like brothers and shit." Shaking my head, my tone was sarcastic, since he's always fast to speak about how close we are.

We're really not. He tries—tries to chill even when no business is being conducted, but I'm still a hard sell. I'm actually much closer to Riley.

"Listen, I knew shorty was knocked up, but you were pretending like you ain't neva hit it. You feel me? I wasn't gonna blow up _her_ spot. And if it was what'shisface's kid, I wasn't gonna let _you_ get caught out there."

I pursed my lips, and I guessed I could dig that. "All right…but it is my kid."

"So…you hit it?"

"Yeah, before any shit went down." I nodded, thinking about that night—how twenty amazing minutes could change everything so drastically.

"What'chu gonna do about it?" he asked.

"That's up to her. She's knows I'll do the right thing—be there."

"Fuck what's right or wrong. What do you want?" He stopped at a red light to look at me. "You ready to be a daddy? Put a ring on her finger?"

"I—"

"You gotta think about that shit." He drove off. "I'm a father. It doesn't stop me from doin' me. I'm out there—doing whatever. It doesn't alter shit that much. You know? She'll be with the baby. You got a house. You're pretty set at twenty-two, livin' nice and shit. You even own a business. What's the harm?"

"Having a kid is one thing. People do it all the time, but marriage?" To me, it was a scary word. I was set with Bella, I adored and cared for her, and would continue to do so if she had it or not.

But getting married…?

With all the what ifs flying around, I just wasn't sure.

"Why do I have to get married? We're chill. We—"

"'Cause you hafta. That's why. I'm just sayin'. If you don't, people will look at her like she's your ho—your goomah. You're a good guy. I know you don't want that for Bella." He hit my arm. "You love her?"

I nodded slowly. "I do."

"She know that?"

"I don't know. I—I haven't—said it. We've been a couple for only a few hours," I laughed at the irony. "But I caught feelings early . . . She fucking baited me from jump, and I bit the line…I still don't wanna let go."

"After only hittin' it once?" He snorted and then cracked up. "Good for you, bro. Be a daddy, do the right thing, marry her. I promise. You'll be happy. As long as you love her, how could it go wrong?" He shrugged. "All of that doesn't mean you have to change shit. You'll have a nice home. Bella will be there after a long night. Know what I'm saying? For me, the day Bianca was born…" He shook his head, speaking of his daughter. "It was the happiest day of my life." He grinned, turning to look at me. "Marie's pregnant again, too."

"Wow." My eyes were wide. "She just had Bianca—"

"We haven't announced it yet. Well, my parents know. I haven't told Ali yet. I love my baby sis, but she got a big mouth." He nodded. "I'm hoping for a boy this time." CJ crossed his fingers.

"Congratulations," I said.

"Congrats to you, too." He smiled. "It's a good thing, Edward. Babies are a blessing. They bring joy—a new beginning."

"Right." I cleared my throat. "Is it weird that I think it hasn't hit me yet?" Inside, I didn't feel a sense of doom or gloom. Nor was I upset at all, it was what it was . . .

"Trust . . . honestly? Like, I saw Marie's belly getting bigger, but it didn't hit until I saw a head poking out her_ bookyak_," he guffawed. "Best day ever."

His mood rubbed off on me because I started laughing. He really was a funny dude. "Still . . . I don't know what Bella wants."

"She wants it," he said. "She's only on the fence 'cause she don't know what's in your head."

"How do you know that?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I just do. It's how broads think. And all of them go _ga-gaaz_ for babies. Babies and fucking diamonds, bro…Bella loves babies. She's good with them, too."

I sighed, slumping low as we rode along the highway. "What's good for tonight?"

"It's this guy Joey's spot. I gotta meet him for a sit-down about some bullshit. Just keep an eye out." He never goes anywhere without a few of his crew. "I was talking to my pops."

"How's he doin'?" I stared out the window.

"Good. He's good. He's thinking about making you."

That had my attention; I stared at his profile. "So soon…?"

"Pop has his reasons." He smirked, reaching out to give me a pound. "Your father paved your way…you're royalty by name, but you still got some dues to pay before you can be a member. We'll talk about that tomorrow. Be at my parents' by one, for lunch. Cool?"

"I'll be there."

"Tonight, just have my back, though."

"Something I should know?" I asked.

"Nah, just pay attention. It's hard to do there. The talent. _Madonn'!_" He kissed his fingertips. "The broads there," he drawled. "It's a strip joint."

"Oh…" That was good to know, so I wasn't caught off guard.

"Riley needs you to call him. He's making another trip down south, wants you to ride with him."

I nodded as CJ looked for parking.

**See you next week!**

**Thank you for reading. **


	72. Chapter 72

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-Two**

While we walked to Breaking Dawn, CJ told me he'd hook me up with his jewelry guy, so I could get Bella a ring.

Still torn, I didn't say much.

In fact, my head was so fucked, I hardly noticed the broads CJ spoke of.

_Fuck._

Hardly…but I knew they were there…naked bitches everywhere.

They were actually_ hard _to miss.

Months ago, I would have been into it—it actually had me wishing I'd come here before Hurricane Bella stormed through me.

I could have had some fun.

They have places like this overseas—mostly in Europe—although it's wilder in comparison.

Anything goes in those places, and here there were more than a dozen signs saying, "Look but don't touch."

At the end of the day, though—even if I was hornier than a motherfucker—none of these skanks even compared to what I had at home.

_. . . If Bella was at my house._

My mind whirred about all things sex, though—wondering when Bella and I would get down again, if we could, if she even wanted to.

_I'm surrounded by naked women, sue me._

CJ introduced me to Joey, and he seemed like an okay guy. We didn't converse. The subject matter in which they spoke about surprised me. Especially since Carlisle Colleoni Sr., CJ's pops, told me a million times, like Riley's been telling me, not to get involved with drugs—dealing and trafficking and the like.

Yet, I had to be quiet and feign no knowledge, which is always fun…cool with me.

The dudes Colleoni has running shit—narcotics—like the Jakes and the Emmetts are kept at arm's length, and they could never be made members of the organization. He wants none of _his_ guys doing it.

And I understood why.

Anyone gets pinched, feels the need to point a finger, Colleoni would go down, too—we all would.

I also got the impression CJ and this cat didn't know each other very well.

When they started to divvy lines of coke, I looked the other way.

I'd never get mixed up in that shit—doesn't interest me. Maybe I'll drink myself silly, maybe I've smoked a joint a time or two, but I don't fuck with nothing like that.

Joey's a dealer—that's the impression I got—and CJ was checking his product.

And now he's getting involved with blow?

I don't get CJ.

He already stole Emmett's heroin connection—the one he had with Jake—right out from under him. Now, anyone who's buying dope is actually getting it from CJ.

Riley told me all of that, warned me to stay away from that shit, too—no matter how easy it'd all sound, no matter how much money CJ promised.

"Come on, baby." This chick, some stripper, extended her hand to CJ.

He wiped at his nose and then slapped my back. "I'll leave you to it. Talk to my man right here, Ed." As quick as he'd said that, he got up and left with the blonde.

"You having a good time?" Joey asked.

"Yeah," I lied.

"Did you want…?" Joey went to hand me a rolled up bill, gesturing to the line that was left on the table.

"Nah…I'm good." I felt like being a dick and spilling my beer, and that thought made me smile.

"It's good shit, bro…It'll send you to the moon," he laughed.

I raised a brow. "I'm fine with my feet on earth."

Joey nodded as he sized me up, looking me up and down and shit.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

Joey scooted closer, smiling like we were buddies now. "He's gonna help me get a sit-down with his pops."

I nodded along.

"You see, I need help. I made a huge score—bags of coke like this." He widened his palms. "Mad kilos . . . I need to unload it."

I didn't say anything.

"I'm thinking…I need someone to come in with me. Ceej says he's down, but we need someone to do the footwork."

I studied the beer I'd ordered but have yet to drink.

"You don't talk much." Joey hit my arm.

I smiled, shrugging my shoulders.

He nodded slowly as he sat back to appraise me again. "I got these guys in Newark. They're gonna help me get my shit out there. Understand? I need someone who's willing to deliver, and I've heard around the way you're the guy I'd go to if I had a delicate package that needed extra care."

"I'm not FedEx."

Joey barked out a laugh. "That's funny . . ." He composed himself quickly, leaning farther into me. "The thing is, I need someone I can trust, and if CJ says he can trust you . . ." He trailed off. "And _I_ trust _him_. You see how that goes…? Plus, if anyone's watching, they might try to rip me off…but from what I hear, no one's crazy enough to fuck wit'chu."

I sucked my teeth, wincing. "That's a hot and heavy load…Know what_ I'm_ sayin'? I don't know you. Maybe CJ knows you, maybe CJ trusts you...but I don't." I thought better as I looked over to him. "I don't even know what you're talking about anyway."

He laughed, placing his arm around my shoulders, and I had no idea what was so fucking funny. "Listen, baby, you can trust me."

I stared at his arm until he removed it.

"My bad."

"Yeah…calling me baby like I'm your bitch or some shit. You don't know me, and let's leave it at that." I had nothing else to say.

Joey showed me his palms before he stood up and left the booth.

With a napkin, I pushed the line of blow off the table and then I waited for CJ to finish getting sucked off—or whatever he was doing.

The music was shit. They played some techno garbage, and bitches wanting to dance for me approached the table . . .

I declined, my mind running away from me.

Transporting coke . . . I didn't wanna get mixed up in that at all.

Guns are one thing, especially since I felt a level of trust with Riley—fucking Marcus and others on CJ's crew, too.

But this guy . . . fucking this cat Joey _and_ CJ.

Something didn't sit right with me, and I respected what my godfather said. Also, if my godfather ever found out I was involved in some shit like this…my career of whatever-the-fuck I am would be over. In fact, I had no idea what CJ was up to. I know he does his own thing—thinks he's larger than life, thinks that he's a bigger deal than his father. He obviously doesn't respect his father if he's down with this shit.

CJ's going against the grain.

First with running heroin and now this shit?

His betrayal to his father's rule was major.

Colleoni Sr. could put a bullet between his son's eyes for some shit like this.

_Imagine what he'd do to me?_

It wasn't only fear that made me not want to be involved.

It had to do with respect.

Doing what's right. Doing what's smart.

And I'm not fucking stupid.

It had to do with my own unwillingness, too.

We should have brought Emmett along for the ride. He would have loved this place, and he's crazy. He'd be down to take the risk—make whatever money since he took a huge hit with CJ stealing from him.

Nevertheless, during the drive back to Brooklyn, CJ said he respected my decision to stay away from it. He also wanted me to have the chance to deny the offer _myself_, before he did it_ for_ me.

His hands were tied, and he had to meet with the guy for his father . . . which was a lie.

I know what's up.

This guy Joey turned out to be a friend of a friend, or some bullshit.

But I quickly realized it was _all_ bullshit, _all _lies—excuses CJ was feeding me, making it so the sit-down was legit.

Since I'd denied—since I wouldn't go in on this, CJ laid the whole "I had to sit with this cat for my pops" on thick.

And it was obvious, the reason why CJ didn't get on my ass for not getting involved.

CJ was covering _his_ ass.

If CJ had made my denial a big deal, he'd fear me going to his father.

He was also testing me—testing my loyalty, I guess—to see if I'd do business with him behind his father's back.

I played it cool.

As a member of CJ's crew, he's got my silence, and I made sure he knew that.

He can say we're like brothers all he wants, but the moment he stops trusting me—thinks I'll go behind his back to his father—my time'll be up.

Since the day I met CJ, I never thought I could trust him, but more and more…I'm agreeing with Riley.

CJ's a punk, thinks he's this tough guy…and he's trouble. He's where he is by name only.

Because he's the prince of New York, Colleoni's son, his blood.

If old man Colleoni doesn't do something to stop him . . . CJ might bring us all down with this stupid crap, taking dumb risks to fill his pockets, getting involved with all this drug shit.

Hell, CJ thinks he's the head of the family any-fucking-way.

Essentially, I'm a nobody and nobody tells me shit, nothing of any importance anyway. I do what I'm told, and I make my money wherever I can. Nowadays, I have a name, although I'm truly just a knockaround guy, half a wise guy with a mean streak, one who's not afraid to pull a trigger—get my hands dirty.

That's all people know.

Still, I don't know what's up or down, and I'm winging it—making the decisions that are smart for me.

When I get my button that'll change—I'll be privy to a lot more information.

Now, I'm just along for the ride…

I thought being made would be a long way off, but I'll see what's up when I have lunch with Colleoni Sr.

Truth be told—and it might sound stupid—I want to earn my wings myself, by merit. I don't want to be inducted solely because of who my father was.

Edward Masino Jr. makes his own way—always has and always will.


	73. Chapter 73

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-Three**

When CJ dropped me off, I really didn't know what to think—what to make of the entire ordeal—but I knew I needed to watch my ass. I needed to play by the rules of the game before I lost, before it's game over.

I had my thoughts, my own beliefs, and…

Even if I'm not a member just yet…

Even if I'm still a nobody…

I've already done too much to turn back.

I was in the game, an active player.

There's no turning back, no moving away…nothing.

I was in.

We didn't get back to Brooklyn until it was close to two in the morning.

As I entered my house, I tried to be quiet.

I didn't know if Bella was here, although I hoped she was. If she wasn't, I'd have to sneak into Jasper's crib, needing to snuggle up with her after a day like today.

When I went into the kitchen for a drink, I smiled, seeing a plate of food on the counter with a note.

"You didn't eat today," was all it said, and I popped it into my microwave.

I had nothing else in this kitchen, besides a coffee mug, one bowl, and a couple of plates I stole from Sal's, but I'd made sure to scoop up a microwave last week.

As my food spun on that clear plate, I walked up to my bedroom.

My grin went from ear-to-ear, seeing Bella tangled in the blankets. She'd put sheets on the bed, brought over more pillows, and the room smelled like her.

Careful not to wake her, I kissed her hair.

"Edward?" Her hand came out to fist my shirt.

"It's me."

Her eyelids fluttered open. "Hi."

"Hey." I tilted my head, enjoying the view. "I'm gonna eat before I come to bed."

"Eat in bed."

"Okay," I agreed. "I missed you." Leaning forward, I captured her lips with my own.

She moaned, pulling me down, and I used my hand to keep my weight off of her. "It's been months," she whispered against my lips.

"Months?" I was confused, kissing down her neck.

Bella panted, her chest rising and falling. "I—oh Gawd."

I smirked, my eyes finding hers. "You're crazy cute. You know that?"

She didn't answer me, turning to place a kiss on my palm. "Are you hungry?" She had this sly grin going on.

"For what?" I think I asked the right question.

"I have fantasies…" She sat up quickly to pull me back down to her.

Bella kissed me with…with so much passion, I got lost.

Getting under the blanket to join her, she spread her legs, letting me get between those, too. "Can I…?" I went to lift her shirt.

"Yeah…" She was breathy, and she misunderstood me.

Bella placed my hands on her clothed breasts instead.

I could feel that she wasn't wearing a bra, and…

I let out a grunt, palming those bad boys, kissing along her chest—the t-shirt in my way—as my hips moved to meet her.

Bella gasped. "Christ…you're hard."

"Yeah." I bit her nipple through the fabric, tweaking the other with my thumb and forefinger. "Lemme—" I didn't know what to say or what to ask as I looked up to her. "Tell me when to stop 'cause—" I wasn't sure if I'd be able to, but that wasn't an option.

Given the past few months, this had to be Bella's show. She had to start making decisions. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." She reached between us to rub me over my slacks.

I pushed into her hand. It felt amazing. "Bella—"

"I'm okay." She unbuckled my belt, sneaking her hand down my pants.

My eyes rolled—being on top of her, having her scent in my nose, her hand on my dick . . .

When her feet came up to push my pants and boxers down, I cursed. "Fuck." Her legs wide, her knees up, my hands ran along the insides of her thighs. "You're so sexy."

She smiled. "You too."

Pausing in my movements, I thought better and rolled onto my back, taking her with me. "Just…whatever you wanna do." I palmed her tits. "Shit." Sitting up, I hugged her to me tightly, going for her nipples again. "Can you take this off?" I spoke of her t-shirt.

"Wait." She leaned away to take off her pants instead, but the pants . . .

"You're sure?" My heart was thumping away in my chest.

She didn't answer me, attacking my mouth instead.

We continued to roll around on the bed, kissing, touching, licking, and she kept biting me, and I kept trying to remove her shirt; meanwhile, I was afraid to make any big moves—gestures—because she wasn't either.

And I was about to come . . . wherever it landed.

"Bella—" I grunted, gritting my teeth; she was jacking my dick so hard and fast.

"Come for me," she whispered.

"Fuck!" I saw stars, my body convulsing as I came. "Shit."

Bella wore a satisfied smirk while she nestled into my side, and there was a gooey, hot mess on my stomach. "You needed that."

"Yeah." I panted. "But—"

"I'm okay. I like that I got you off," she giggled. "I satisfied you."

"Oh…" I lifted my head, looking down to her bare legs. "I can—" I wanted to tell her I could reciprocate, have her as an appetizer, or be ready to go again in five to ten minutes.

We'd ignored the elephant in the room for long enough, too.

I'd expressed my concerns, wondering if she'd be ready to date, but I never asked about the physical shit. Like, if it brought back memories, or if she was legit traumatized because of Jake.

I wanted to ask.

I wanted to fuck Bella in the worst way—come inside her.

_What's the harm?_

She's already pregnant.

And, logically, if pregnant women couldn't have sex…I think I would have heard about it somewhere in my travels. I would've seen it on the news or something, too—"Baby gets brain damage from Daddy's dick."

Alas, we've come so far within such a short span of time—having been together less than a day—and I didn't want to frighten her.

"I can—did you want something from the kitchen?" I chickened out.

"No." She sucked under my ear. "Hmmm. I'm gonna give you a hickey."

"Okay." My thumb ran up and down her spine while she got busy sucking on my neck. Sadly, my cock was ready to go again. Her mouth—what she was doing—sent a signal down to him, and I tried my best—trust me, I did—not to get a hard-on. "Bella—" I tilted my head away.

"What?" she laughed. "I'm marking my man."

Maybe I've never been in a relationship before.

Maybe I never gave a fuck—past getting some pussy—when it came to women before.

Maybe I never back down from a fight, no matter how big the other dude is, no matter what he's packing…

But the thought of making my Silly Girl, my Bella-Boo sad, when she was tickled-fucking-pink to kiss and nip along my neck?

I didn't want to upset her.

Bella had me by the balls, _and_ she's pregnant.

She had my nuts in a vise.

I sighed, "Just don't gimme a necklace."

I can't be pussy-whipped since I'm not getting any . . .

No, I _was_ the pussy.


	74. Chapter 74

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-Four**

The next morning, I woke up to an empty bed, the smell of coffee in the air.

When I sat up, I noticed my slacks were still down around my ankles. Last night, I never went back to the kitchen for my food, and I woke up starving.

Pulling my pants off and unbuttoning my shirt, I threw them into my pile on the floor.

After taking a piss, brushing my teeth, and cleaning up, I met Bella in the kitchen.

She was making scrambled eggs.

"Where'd this come from?" I asked, landing a smooch in her hair.

"I got up early and went to the store. You had nothing in here." She scrunched her nose. "All you had was beer. I tried to get you more of that, too, but I got carded."

I hopped to sit on the counter, very fucking happy to have woken up to this. "It's cool. Whatever's clever."

"Jazz is the same way. He's fine eating pizza every day." She shook her head.

"Move in with me." I blurted that without thinking, but I didn't take it back, wanting to gauge her reaction. Plus, I'd already said it, and within the seconds it took to leave my mouth, I realized that I truly wanted her to live with me.

She whipped around to stare at me. "Where'd that come from?"

"I like...having you here." I left the counter to gather her into my arms. "I like you in my bed—"

"And in your kitchen cooking for you." She rolled her eyes.

"Hey, like you just said, I'll eat pizza every day." I chuckled.

She giggled, leaning her forehead into my chest. "Jasper—"

"Will get over it," I said. "It's fast. We're rushing, but…you're _my_ woman. You're having _my_ baby." It all made perfect sense to me.

We couldn't be a family and live in different houses.

That was it, though…

Bella and the baby would be _my_ family. They'd be mine, for me. I'd care for them. We'd be a family—they could be the family I never had.

They'd be mine.

_For me…_

"_I am…?_ Having your baby?" she asked.

"Are you_ not_ pregnant?" I laughed.

"I just—I haven't decided—"

"What's to decide?" I smiled. "Fuck it."

"Fuck it?" She leaned away from me, her attitude shining. "Fuck it? That's it? Just fuck it?"

"You know—"

"No, I don't know what you mean, Edward." She turned off the stove and then shoved the pan of eggs into the sink.

"What the fuck—" I went to pull it out, so breakfast wasn't ruined, and I burned myself. "Shit." I hissed, watching Bella gather her things. "What are you doin'?!"

"I want you to want me," she cried. "That's what I want!"

"I do!"

"Not because you have to." She spat. "I want you to want this baby, too . . . _I_ want it!" Bella shouted. "I want—"

She looked to the floor for a second, realization coloring her face, like she was having an epiphany. "Yes . . . I want _my_baby, and if you don't . . . then fuck you, Edward! Fuck you!" She gave me the finger, stomping toward the door.

"Whoa!" I hollered, shocked to shit. "What the fuck—"

"I can do it without you! I think Jasper's right. I spent too much time worried about you and not enough worrying about me!" she choked on a sob, opening the door to leave.

I ran to the door, slamming it closed and blocking her exit. "You're not going anywhere," I said, pushing her farther into the house, as anger filled me. "Fuck that! You don't get to run your mouth like that and run away!" Exasperated, I tried to catch my breath.

Bella's lip quivered as she palmed her stomach, stepping away from me. "I'm sorry. Just don't—" She turned away from me, cringing and curling up, covering her head. "I'm sorry for yelling—I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she chanted.

"Fuck!" I kicked the door behind myself, which made her jump, and then I wanted to kick myself.

"Please, don't!" she shrieked.

"Baby, I'm not…Bella, if you wanna go—" I whispered "—you're free to go." Turning from her, I opened the door, paving her way. "I'm not going to hurt you. I could never."

She quietly shook as she cried, but she wouldn't face me.

Afraid to touch her, I decided to keep talking, keeping some distance between us. Bella hadn't moved, and I stayed by the open door. "I do want you…I want you and the baby…more than I've ever wanted anything." I swallowed the lump in my throat.

She sniffled, facing me and wiping her tears away. "You-you do?"

"Yes . . . Can I close this?" I tilted my head to the door.

She nodded, but she hadn't made a move to come toward me.

I closed the door, taking slow steps to close the distance between us. "Please, relax. I want it all, too." I paused, extending my hand. "I'd never hurt you…never, Bella. You know that…I _know_ you know that. You trust me, and you know I'd never ever hurt you."

Once upon a time, she had faith in me, and I hoped she still did. "I can't promise I'll never get angry—that I won't yell because I'm upset or mad, but I'd never place my hands on you…to hurt you. Bella, you know that." I clamped my eyes closed, desperate.

She hiccupped as she grasped my hand. "I'm sorry—sorry for yelling."

"Don't be…Don't be sorry." I placed a kiss on her palm. "I'm sorry if I scared you. I didn't mean to._ I _got scared…angry that you were leaving without letting me explain." I shrugged, my eyes pricking with tears.

I shook it off. "Bella, I want it all, you _and_ the baby…'cause _I_ want it…not because I have to…but, Bella—" I palmed her cheek, thumbing her tears away "—what I don't want is for you to feel pressured. You wanna have a kid? I'm down. Let's do it. Let's get married."

"What?" Her eyes were as big as saucers, and she let go of my hand to widen her arms. "What?" The tears were gone, replaced with this huge smile.

I blew out a breath, walking around her. "Whoa…" That shit just came tumbling out my mouth, too.

"What'd you say?" she whispered. "Oh…if you didn't mean it—"

"No, I do mean it." I turned back to her, my stomach knotting up. "Let's do it."

She stomped her foot and she started crying again. "Don't fuck with me, please...I'm-I'm emotional and my boobs are killin' me this morning, and you scared me, and now you—nothing makes sense."

"I'm not fucking with you!" I shouted back, gathering her into my arms, and this time she didn't jump when I raised my voice. "I want it all—you, the baby, tears, and achy tits, too."

She covered her smile with her hand, and I pulled it away so I could see it. "Um, really?"

I cracked a small grin, gathering her into my arms. "Yeah, but are we okay?" I wasn't sure—between asking her to live with me, her pitching a fit, me scaring her, and then my botched proposal.

_Fucking crazy-ass morning. _

She sniffled, turning up to face me again. "Yeah."

I wiped under her nose with my thumb. "You're sure, weepy?" That'd be my new nickname for her.

"I-I'm so, so happy . . . I do wanna marry you," she said, yet she still had tears in her eyes.

Growing accustomed to her mood swings, even if it'd only been like a day, I didn't comment and rubbed her back. She kept giggling and hugging me tight; meanwhile, she was still crying.

Hell, I'd gotten a little weepy this morning, too—all confused.

_Crazy-ass morning._

_Indeed._

When someone rang the doorbell, I left her and grabbed my heat to answer the door.

It was just Jasper . . . sans bat.

My friend took one look at his sister and ran to her side. "What happened?"

Bella shook her head, having composed herself. "Nothing—"

"What'd'ju do?" he asked me.

"I…proposed…asked her to marry me." I locked eyes with him. "I would have asked your permission, but…it wasn't exactly planned."

"I'm happy," Bella assured him.

Jasper's head whipped between us.

"Everything all right?" I asked him. "Did you need something?"

He waved a hand, grabbed the pot of coffee, and then left my house.

"Jazz!" I called out to him.

"I just wanted a cup of fucking coffee!" He crossed the street.

"All right. See you later!" I shouted.

He waved, keeping his back to me.

Going to Bella, I sat on the couch with her. "Now you know what I want, but before we do anything…you gotta be certain, make sure you're truly happy with the decision." I shrugged. "I mean…you are very far along."

It wasn't like she was a little bit pregnant. I felt her stomach, and it's kinda solid-like. There's definitely something in there, and that fucked with my head—made it real, sealed the deal even more—hoping she'd want to keep it.

"Yeah…I do have to think. I only have…another week window. It's scheduled for Monday."

I nodded. "That soon?"

"Oh, we can…I want—oh, you're mad," she spluttered.

"I'm not!" I exclaimed. "I swear." It was a douchebag move, but I decided to ask her a few more questions—wanting her to answer and make more decisions. "Can we make you a doctor's appointment? With a real doctor?"

"I saw a real one." She rested her head in my lap.

"I know…but…if we're going to do this, don't you need to go more?"

"Oh…crap." She held her stomach.

"What?" Startled, I held her biceps.

It was projectile, and I didn't see it coming.

She puked in the same spot she did yesterday.


	75. Chapter 75

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-Five**

She puked in the same spot she did yesterday.

Weirdly enough, it was about this same time yesterday morning, too.

"I'm sorry."

"It's…" With a short wave of my hand, I dismissed her apology, but she grimaced.

Afraid of the waterworks, I smiled and said, "This is your place now, too. Puke everywhere! Yay!"

"You're so silly."

I kissed her forehead and left the couch. "I'll get paper towels." I wondered why she could never make it into the toilet, or at least the fucking sink.

"I don't usually throw up this often. My stomach is nervous, too." She rubbed her belly. "With everything up in the air…"

"It's not…everyday?" I sprayed some Windex on the floor.

"No." She shook her head. "Alice said I'm lucky. Marie was sick, kept puking when she had Bianca. I…I honestly had no symptoms until very recently. But now that I think about it, I mean, I know I've been through a lot, but I'm too emotional. I'm tougher than this," she said that last bit to herself.

"Yeah…" I agreed with her.

"And I wanna be tough for you—for Jasper, so you guys don't worry." Her tone was still hushed.

"Don't worry about being anything for us." I winked. "Just be you. But we _should_ ask a doctor if that's normal, all the crying . . .?"

But then I remembered what Jazz had told me a while ago.

Bella sounded prone to depression—plus, all the highs and lows.

She never recovered from losing her grandmother, and then she was . . .

_There's no need to sugarcoat in my own brain, but I hate thinking about it._

Bella was basically raped and abused for a fucking year. And I only drew that conclusion from what I've pieced together. Jake—what that fucking monster did to her. God knows what he did. I found her that one time, but Bella won't talk about it…how many other times shit like that happened, and…she acted as though that last episode was nothing, like she'd had worse.

_She's young, always so fucking confused, and scared—no matter her sassy attitude._

Bella doesn't have the life experience for what…_life itself_ has handed her, thrown her way.

Maybe she just feels things more with being pregnant?

Knocked up or not—soon, very-fucking-soon—I hope to broach the therapy subject again, and I hope she goes for it.

I'd love to take on the world for Bella, fight her battles, but she might need more help than I can provide.

She's not crazy or anything.

She just…might need some extra help, which breaks my fucking heart.

It doesn't make her broken. What happened in her past takes nothing away from my feelings. I just desperately want Bella to be healthy and happy.

Knowing she's tried to hurt herself in the past scares the shit out of me, too.

And life is funny…

Thinking about all that…how Bella sometimes behaves when she's down, it reminded me of my mother.

My mother always self-medicated with a bottle of booze, would rather be a drunk than take her meds. I'd always harbored ill feelings toward my mom in that respect, too—she could never be better, take her medication for me, so she could be a decent mother or whatever.

And I fell head-over-heels in love with someone who has the potential to . . .

No.

Maybe Bella could benefit from therapy, but she's no way as bad as my mother. Elizabeth didn't go through half of what Bella did. My mother was sick; Bella's been extremely unlucky, but she tries. Bella tries her best.

The deep depression is the only thing they have in common, and Bella was fine—I think—until I left.

I'm not going anywhere now.

I'll do everything within my power to make sure Bella heals.

"How'd you know you were pregnant?" I frowned, carrying the mountain of paper towels over to the trash can.

"With everything that had happened? I forgot…totally forgot that I hadn't gotten my period. It was summer—my first summer out of school. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months . . ." She was sad again. "Honestly, I'd hardly know which day it even was…dates and stuff? You think I'm stupid?"

"No, no way," I said. "But if you're gonna keep vomiting, too—"

Bella apologized three more times.

"Relax." I sat with her again. "Just…if you're sick now and weren't before, we need to know why and if all this is normal—go see a doctor."

"My stomach has been nervous, nerves on edge." She rubbed her belly again. "I'm almost to my second trimester, and they say a lot of things stop—you stop being sick, but you encounter other things."

"We should get a book about it." That sounded like a great plan, but I had this nagging need to finish our previous discussion. There were a few questions I needed answers to. "Uh—"

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"You say you have a week window...that shit is scheduled for Monday. I proposed. I'm down. You said so yourself—that you wanted the baby, and I know I brought it up. I told _you _to think about what _you_ want, and yet you sound like you're still on the fence?" That made no sense to me. "You said so before, that you want—"

She shook her head. "I just don't want you to feel trapped…Regardless, Edward, I can't have an abortion…I c-can't." Her voice broke. "I don't want to, but if it was something you wanted—"

"Good." I nodded. "I don't want you to do it…Bella, I'm being honest. I don't feel trapped. I don't plan on going anywhere, and I don't want you to do that. I want us to be a family." I smiled.

She blew out a slow breath. "I'm not gonna cry…but that's what I want, too. I want you…forever and ever, and I want our baby." Her lip quivered but she bit it down. "I'm okay."

"Good," I sighed, feeling exhausted. "Also…I'm walking on eggshells here." I twirled her soft hair around my fingers. "I wonder what's the right thing, what's the wrong thing . . . When it comes to us…being intimate, I mean. I don't know what's okay and what isn't. And I often wonder if you're still—I don't know."

She sat up to sit in my lap and wrap her arms around my neck.

I smiled, because I loved having her here, on me, with me—you name it. "I wanna go at your pace, but I don't wanna set you back—fuck you up or something. I…I know PTSD, and I know certain triggers—like being sexual—can take you right back to that place, even if you know it's me and not him. Do you understand?"

She nodded but I wasn't sure if she truly understood. "If you do something I'm not comfortable with, I'll tell you, I guess? I've never had anal sex—"

"I'm not—" I chuckled "—I'm not talking about that."

I love Bella, but just like Alice…_my_ girl wasn't the brightest crayon in the box, either.

And I always try to remind myself…so I have patience.

She's young, immature, and I can only imagine the heavy thoughts, and the confusion she'd been carrying around for…a long time.

Again, she was tied to Jake for a year, and then this…and her thought process hasn't changed.

It seems she has no idea that she should actually be calling the shots.

How has she even been coping? While I'd love to consider myself the snuggling champion of the world, she hasn't spoken to anyone.

And that—her speaking of her experiences—was going to be the only way she'd move past what happened.

Bella finally admitting—acknowledging that Jake had raped her was a huge feat.

She can see a difference now, as sex and rape are two very different things.

Believe it or not, we learned about that at the base—had to take a special, torturous course because there were a few women in my unit—our women that insurgents could torture us with.

Because…we'd have to watch our women practically get slaughtered while keeping our mouths shut about our mission…if we were caught.

Those sand-douches knew the best way to get to us—chivalry not being dead in America and all.

And rape being about _the worst_ thing a man could do to a woman . . .

None of us, even the most sadistic, who celebrated every time they got a kill under their belt, could ever stand the sight of something as brutal—to one of their own, no less.

The more I think about my time in the service . . .

I never became a marine to be a hero. I was never that patriotic, either, while I always had love for my country.

I guess I just didn't have enough to die for it?

That changed once I enlisted, though.

Being around all those gung-ho marines who were anxious to show what they were made of changed that.

I became one of them.

At first, however, the truth was…I needed to be fed, I needed a roof over my head, and to be taught a skill.

While I can't walk into some corporate office with a well-written resume, my past has helped me move up the ladder in my current line of work.

I've been to Iraq and Afghanistan, and neither _country_ had anything to do with blowing up the World Trade Center. Both countries, however, housed _bases_ for the group of Islamic extremists—al-Qaeda—who were responsible for the terror attacks…_and_ we were looking for their ring leader. They were allegedly retaliating because of the support America gave Israel, our involvement in the Persian Gulf War, and other things . . .

Again, they're a group of extremists—what I like to call "crazy motherfuckers"—so did their reasoning matter?

They did what they did, and the U.S sent forces to dismantle that group, break up the terror cells, and, thus . . . the War on Terror began.

It was easy to get excited back then. They fucked with us, and the U.S took a large hit—it was very fucking tragic. I was young in 2001, and I was still living in New York at the time.

It seemed like any and every American wanted to go over there and tear the place apart. We were hurt, fueled by anger…

People—kids and adults alike—who were of Middle Eastern decent were getting jumped, beat up and blamed for what had happened. And that shit was going on right here in Brooklyn . . . Muslim women were getting their _hijabs _ripped off, too.

And my father broke it all down for me—told me not to be ignorant. That just because the terrorists are this or that ethnicity, it didn't mean all people who hailed from Middle Eastern countries were bad. They weren't all the same, all Muslims weren't the same, and Dad also said he thinks al-Qaeda got the text wrong—in their bible.

_He used to goof, too—saying who wants a bunch of virgins when they get to heaven? He'd take a bunch of sluts any day._

From what I can remember, that was one of our last, serious discussions before he was killed.

By the time I'd arrived over there—my first tour—it'd been established that they had no weapons of mass destruction. Saddam Husain had been clipped already. Osama was on his way out, too. He had a whole unit tracking him, and it wasn't long until that old-ass, dialysis-needing motherfucker was killed, too.

Meanwhile, I went over there, was excited to see some action...being American, being from New York, remembering what happened back in 2001. It wasn't about needing a place in the world anymore.

It was about pride—using the skills I'd learned, and my fellow Marines quickly became my band of brothers…their enthusiasm and views rubbing off on me.

After a few months of being over there, though . . . my thought process had changed. I was supposed to be one of these disposable thugs ready to fight to my death in the middle of the desert…when it truly felt like I was just waiting to be blown up by a car bomb rigged by a 12 year old who loved _Friends_ and Metallica until one of our missiles blew up his house.

While I was willing to die for freedom, for my country, my thoughts became controversial—wondering if we were truly fighting the war on terrorism, or the war for oil.

And it's still going on today.

"Then what are you saying?"

"Huh?" I shook my head, my thoughts having run away from me.

"What do you mean…about being scared?" she asked.

"Like…because of what happened, I know not to expect a blow job any time soon." I shrugged, and I was real blunt, but I needed her to understand.

"Yeah," she whispered. "But you're not him. It's totally different. I'm not scared of the act, per se."

"I know; I'm not him. I'd just hate to set you back—"

Overseas, back at the base—stateside—and now, I have no problems sleeping. But I knew of a few guys who were fucked mentally after our tour. They were quick to sign up again, anxious to get back because they forgot what it was like to be home—always having their guard up, having seen mad fucked-up shit. And whenever they were home and safe, anything could trigger those dudes, bring them right back to the fucking desert, have them thinking they're fighting for their lives again. They bug out.

PTSD is a motherfucker.

To be honest, I could never understand the mind-set. Like, I understand that PTSD is real—that those dudes, just like Bella have a real problem. I've just never been plagued by anything like that.

I have more issues dealing with personal problems, those that aren't life and death but seem to feel that way.

Maybe I'm fucked in the head—more so than those cats could ever be—because none of it affected me.

Every time I came back to the states, I wanted to get on my knees to kiss the ground, happy to be home. I never had problems readjusting, but some do.

Maybe my brain is different, how I don't bat an eyelash when I have to do certain things.

I'll always be a marine…all of which doesn't give me a license or the want/need to kill, but I can do what I have to do.

An enemy is an enemy. It's kill or be killed over there and here on the streets of Brooklyn.

_So, it doesn't matter . . . not to me._

Between Edward Sr. being my father, growing up the way I did, and then enlisting…

More and more, I know I made the right decision to come back to Brooklyn. Not only to fulfill my namesake, but to make a name for myself as Edward Masino, Jr.

Maybe all things Bella confuses me—all the matters of the heart—but it's wasn't until recently that I learned . . .

I have a heart.

I'm capable of love.

I'm capable of caring.

And I want Bella to be better.

And maybe now…that I have something to care about, if I went away, reenlisted . . . It'd be different.

Because now…I'd have something to lose.

I cringed because of all my sudden and jumbled thoughts, but Bella didn't notice that I'd gotten lost in my own head. She kept on talking.

"My head was messed up for a long time," she whispered. "I was afraid to do anything, too—afraid I'd say or do the wrong thing, get too clingy, and that'd make you leave. I was afraid of losing you, and in doing so…in doing everything I thought was right, I lost you."

"I moved down the street—"

"You flipped out. You changed." She furrowed her brow. "You're this hothead sometimes."

"Why did you make me think there was someone else?" I asked.

"I didn't. You asked what was wrong, and I was scared to tell you about the baby. So, yeah. I had guy problems, but you were the guy." She bit my jaw.

The side of my mouth turned up. "Watch the teeth."

She giggled. "We were okay. You were mine as long as things stayed the same. I didn't know you wanted more . . . trust me; I want it all too…with you. I want to make love a million times a week, have you come home to me . . . but in hindsight, we were just friends who flirted, and you were there for me . . . We haven't even gone on a date yet."

I pursed my lips. "You're correct."

"I know." She nodded.

"So cute." I squashed her to me. "I'm sorry for being an asshole—getting all dramatic and shit."

"I'm sorry for not telling you. That's why I came here the other night. I couldn't sleep. Then you came home drunk with . . ."

I hummed, looking at the time. "I have to go to Alice's for lunch with her parents. You wanna come?"

She nodded. "Lemme go home so I can shower and get ready."

I wanted to tell her to pack, but I had a better idea. "And tonight, we'll go anywhere you want. A date."

She beamed at me. "Where?"

"I don't know. New Corners?"

She squealed. "I gotta go home. That place is classy. I gotta see if I have something nice—"

"We'll get you something nice. Don't worry about it." I knew Bella not to be as proud as Jasper, but it wasn't like I gave a fuck.

She could have every penny I had.

It meant dick to me.

Funny how that turns out.

Money's more important when you _don't_ have it.

Yet, Bella meant more than any amount—rich or poor.


	76. Chapter 76

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

Tribute

Chapter Seventy-Six

CJ was right about his sister.

Alice has the biggest fucking mouth.

As soon as I entered Colleoni's with Bella, Esme congratulated me and then practically swept Bella off her feet with her embrace.

Marie, CJ, and the baby were here, too, and Esme made Bella sit with them while Senior accosted me.

He led me out to the backyard, lighting a cigar.

I smoked a cigarette, anxious to hear what he wanted to talk to me about.

"You're gonna do the right thing?" He coughed and cleared his throat. "Damn."

I nodded. "Of course…You okay?"

He coughed again, and I wondered why he still pulled on that cigar. "I mean, you're gonna marry her? Give the baby your name?"

"Yes and yes." I flicked my ashes into the tray.

"Good man." He patted my back. "I know a great place. The owner owes me a favor—I'll call it in." He pointed to me. "Youse two set a date."

"Thank you," I said. "Things are still up in the air, but we're getting there. I need to get a ring."

"I know a guy." He pursed his lips. "He'll take care of you."

I rocked back on my heels, waiting.

"CJ . . . or Riley talk to you about other things?"

"Yes…they've both said a few things."

"When new guys get their button, the ceremony's to be a secret. It's just the way shit is." He blew his smoke up into the air. "I wanted to talk to you first." Senior faced me. "'Cause I know…If I'd gotten clipped and your pops was looking out for Ceej, I'd want him to give my son a choice." He placed his arm around my shoulders, ushering me away from the house.

"You've done some shit. No need to sugarcoat. You jumped right in and you're great. You need to come into your own a li'l more, but…I'll get back to that at another time." He shrugged.

"I need to know where your head's at." He reached to mess my hair, his tone playful. "You made some money. You have your trust and Sal's . . . Edward, you don't need much else. What I'm asking is…do you want your button?"

"Yes—"

"Not so fast." He chuckled, putting his hand out. "Once you're in there's no way out."

I nodded. "What do you think?"

"I think?" He palmed my cheeks. "You do me proud. You carry yourself with honor. You're loyal—a good kid. I mean that. I have love for you. My fears? I get clipped and there's a war between you and…whoever. That's all. You know...if your father was still alive, all of this, everything, would be yours."

I furrowed my brow; meanwhile, I understood everything he said.

"Heavy's the head that wears the crown." He took a seat on a bench. "Come sit."

I followed, keeping my eyes on the house. The living room window is large, and I could see inside it. Esme and Marie spoke animatedly while CJ rocked his daughter in his arms, not paying us any attention.

But Bella stared right at us, and when she saw me looking, she waved.

"You had it rough—a tough childhood. And…there were things I couldn't change. But I wanna welcome you into this family—both of my families."

"Thank you," I said.

"I want you to think about it…Wednesday. That's the day." He squeezed my shoulder. "You tell me on Tuesday—save face. Come Tuesday, if you've decided you'd rather not, I'll say I changed my mind, and you walk away. And I don't mean from here." He widened his arms. "Esme, Alice, and me…We're your family, regardless." He left CJ off that list, and I wondered why. "You just have to walk away from everything else."

I opened my mouth to respond but he stopped me.

"We'll talk Monday or Tuesday. Think about it."

"Okay." I cleared my throat. "Thank you for the heads up…giving me time." Maybe I had a grudge when I first came back, but after hearing about how he did look out for me, and learning of what he couldn't do, I understood him a lot better.

Like my father, he did the best he could.

Carlisle Sr. looked back to his house, his face stoic and withdrawn. "At the moment…there are things I can't say, but I want you to lay low until I call you. Keep to yourself."

"Okay…" Again, it truly wasn't my place to question—question him with who he is. My place was to agree.

"I'll call you, like I said, but don't pull any jobs—don't do nothin'. Riley calls you…He knows better, too." He puffed on his cigar.

I quirked a brow, nodding again, crazy curious as to what was going down.

"Shit is hot," he said, his face falling some. Carlisle seemed torn up about something now. Then he sighed. "Hang out with your woman, stay home or go away the weekend…Try not to even associate with anyone. Stay away from the dry cleaners." He kept his tone hushed, speaking of CJ's day spot. "But I didn't tell you that, and you don't tell no one that."

My eyes widened. "Tell me what?"

Nervous, I played it off, while I wondered what he was saying—what was gonna go down. Did he know what CJ was up to? Was CJ's number up? Would he seriously clip his own son? I had no fucking clue.

"You have my word." I reached to shake his hand, and he pulled me in for a tight hug.

"You're a good boy." He held my cheeks again. "Stay that way."

I grinned, clueless, but I agreed once more.


	77. Chapter 77

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-Seven**

After lunch, I took Bella shopping. Meanwhile, I'd yet to make a reservation anywhere.

When she went into the dressing room, I stood outside. "What time should I reserve a table for?"

Bella walked out in a skimpy black number that almost made me swallow my tongue. "Can you get the zipper?" She lifted her hair.

I closed the dress with ease, hugging her back to me. "This lingerie?" I had mixed feelings about her being seen in public wearing it.

"No. It's classy." She faced the mirror. "I had one just like it months ago, but I gained a few." She held her stomach. "I gave it to Alice."

"You look fantastic."

"Thank you." She ran her hands down her sides.

"You're perfect." And she truly was. "You know…you're going to…gain weight."

"Yeah," she sighed. "That's why I should look sexy now. Right?"

"You'll still be sexy," I laughed.

She turned around to face me. "Promise—" Bella kept her mouth open, her words stuck.

"Promise?" I prompted.

"Forget it." She entered the dressing room. "Hey…can you go get this one in a eight?"

Looking down, I saw her trying to hand me a purple dress.

"It's in the front."

I grabbed it and then went in search for what she wanted.

Twenty minutes later, we left the store with two new dresses and a pair of shoes. As we walked along the avenue, I stopped in front of the AT&T store.

It was time she got a cell phone. At first, she protested and insisted she didn't need one, but I ignored her.

And despite her bitching, after we left the store . . .

Bella was ecstatic, jumping up and down with her new phone, telling me about all the apps she was going to download before she called Alice.

I smiled while I watched her speak rapidly, but then my own phone rang.

It was Jasper. "What's up?" I asked.

_"Come to Sal's…now." _He had an odd tone.

"I'll be right there." I placed my cell in my pocket. "Say goodbye." I tore Bella's phone out of her hands and ended the call. "We gotta go."

"What's wrong?"

"No clue. Jazz called—wants me at Sal's." I rushed out, hailing the cab I saw on the corner.


	78. Chapter 78

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

Chapter Seventy-Eight

The car only had to take us a few blocks over, but it was faster than us walking.

I threw the driver a few bills and then pulled Bella along with me.

Entering the pizzeria, I saw Caius and two of his guys.

"Gentlemen." I smiled. "How can I help you?"

Caius turned to me. "CJ's shop might be on this street, but everything else…" The bat he had in his hand skimmed across the counter. "I'm a nice guy." He picked something off my shirt.

"Don't touch me," I said.

He grinned. "I let enough time pass—where I expected you to do the right thing."

"Such as?" I inquired.

He looked behind me. "Isabella Cigno…What a beautiful woman you turned into…I remember when you were this big." He held his hand to his chest. "You're glowing."

In my periphery, I spied Bella get behind the counter to stand near Jazz.

I moved to get in his line of sight. "Don't talk to her."

His eyes flashed to mine. "This block? Everyone pays. Colleoni was keeping shop here—I let it go. You? I'll make you a deal."

"You're shaking me down? Me?" I laughed, pointing to myself.

"Don't laugh." He moved the bat, making the napkin holders and the garlic shaker fall to the floor.

I pointed down. "Pick it up."

He stepped toward me. "I want five hundred a week. Then we have no problems."

"I ain't givin' you a fuckin' dime." I moved so our chests were practically touching.

"Maybe your pops was somebody, but you're nothing."

"Maybe you didn't hear—get the memo," I said. "I'm on my way up—"

"A lousy, two-bit stick-up man?" He snorted, making his friends chuckle.

The younger dude who was with him took a Snapple out of the fridge. "You're paying for that." I pointed to him.

"This…?" He looked to it before he dropped it onto the floor. "Oops."

At the same time the glass shattered, Caius lifted the bat, and I put my hand out to stop him from clocking me in the head with it.

Grabbing his other arm, I brought it around his back, making his chest hit the counter.

"Maybe you need your hearin' checked—" I took the bat and placed it under his chin, blocking his airway. "I ain't payin', and I suggest you leave before I get angry. This is me relaxed. Remember that." I pulled up on the bat—making him wince, his face purpling—while I bent low to whisper in his ear, "I am somebody . . . someone who can make sure you die with your cock in your hand…just like your scumbag little brother."

"The fuck is this?" Riley asked, barging in.

I looked to him, not letting go of Caius. "A shakedown gone wrong."

"What?" He widened his arms, looking to the goons in the back. "You two." He snapped his fingers, and they ran out of the pizzeria. "Let him go, Ed."

Knowing I had to obey a direct order—Riley being my superior—I did as he said.

Caius stayed slumped on the counter, coughing and rubbing his neck.

What I didn't expect was for Riley to kick Caius's legs out from under him. "Get up, ya old fuck!" he shouted down to him.

Caius complied, standing. "Look, what's—what's right is right. CJ's got from the south end to here, and I have—"

Riley grasped onto his collar, slamming him back into the wall. "I don't give a fuck! You don't come here lookin' for handouts. You hear me?"

Caius nodded.

"You respect this place as if Colleoni is still running it."

"I'm sorry," Caius said.

Riley tossed him over to me.

Wanting to teach this fuck a lesson, I dragged him behind the counter. "Get in the back," I told Bella, and she ran. "You come here looking for money again—" I opened the oven, and Jazz caught on real quick as to what I had in mind. He placed his hand on Caius's head while I pushed. "You're goin' in the fucking oven. Understand?"

"Yes!" Caius shouted.

I pulled him back and tossed him away. "Get the fuck outta hea!" I kicked him in his ass.

Caius scrambled to his feet and then ran out.

I blew out a breath still grinding my teeth, I was so heated.

"That was wicked." Riley held his hand up for a five.

I slapped my hand to his. "What the fuck was that?"

He shrugged, tossing a garlic knot into his mouth. "My boy Mickey saw him come in with a bat—I figured he came to shake you down."

"I gotta worry about this fuck now?"

"Nah." He shook his head. "He's just some old greedy fuck. Besides, after next week, we'll share the avenue." He waved a finger.

"What?" I asked.

Riley leaned into me, smiling. "The people who'd kick up to him'll kick up to you." He hit my back. "Some changes are being made…but I didn't say that." He lifted his hands to show me his palms, much like Colleoni did earlier. "You'll know wassup when you need to."

But he didn't say anything about those who give tribute to CJ.

"I gotta go. I only stopped by the cleaners to grab my suit for tonight—it's my second cousin's second wedding." Riley rolled his eyes, grabbing another garlic knot before he left.

I turned to Jasper.

"What's he mean by next week?" he asked, keeping his tone low.

I didn't know how to answer as I grabbed a broom.

"Edward—"

"Don't worry about it," I said, starting to sweep up the glass. Besides, I had no answers any-fucking-way. "Go see if Bella's okay?"

"Yeah…" He disappeared into the back, but he wasn't happy.

After cleaning up, I went into the back to see Bella tossing dough into the air.

"You ready to go?" I asked.

She giggled. "This is so much fun!" She threw it up, twisting and pulling it as soon as it was in her hands again. "You should try it—you beat it, get the aggression out." She punched it and smoothed it out, while Ruffalo shook his head at her.

"She got potential as a pizza maker?" I asked him.

"She do okay." His accent was thick as he shrugged. "I teach'a her how to make a'pizz, and she teach'a me how to dance." He did some silly two-step while Bella giggled.

"Get the recipe before he drops dead," I whispered in her ear.

She gasped and then laughed.

"What's a matter for you?" he asked us, had stopped dancing.

Bella and I shook our heads, going for nonchalance, and I couldn't believe how cool she was after all that.

I thought I'd have to wipe her tears or something…

(nod) to Goodfellas :-)

**Thank you for reading!**


	79. Chapter 79

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Seventy-Nine**

Dressed in the nicest, most expensive suit I had, I waited for Bella. All of her stuff was still at her house, so after getting ready, I went to pick her up. She thought it'd be fun, too, like a real date.

But we _were_ going on a real date, and I was excited since I couldn't remember ever having gone on one.

"You want a beer?" Jasper asked.

"Sure." I followed him into the kitchen.

"You sure about all this?" He handed me a Heineken. "I know you care about her. It's not—"

"I understand everything you said, but I do love and care for her," I said, hoping he'd see the sincerity—how genuine my words were. "I didn't plan it—falling in love with Bella. It just happened."

He sipped from his longneck.

"What happened when I moved out?" I asked.

"She shut down—would talk crazy, and I was afraid she'd kill herself. She'd let a week roll by without bathing. She'd hoard snacks in her room, only eat those, meanwhile, she was hardly eating. I know you weren't as upset."

"No," I whispered. "Logically, I knew—"

"Yeah, logic…She has no sense of it when it comes to you. She'll do whatever you say—"

"You can trust me," I said.

"Yeah, but you don't know what the fuck you're doing either," he sighed. "After she graduated, I knew Bella was depressed—very down and lost. I thought it'd pass, and then you came to town…She seemed better. Then…" He widened his arms, shrugging.

I didn't know what to say.

"You can't keep all the demons away. Whatever was bothering her before will come back when…the novelty of you is over." Jasper doesn't know about everything Jake did. "But Bella's not like that. She's the type to fight the world—go down, come up swinging. She's different now. She has you to fight her battles." He was wrong about one thing.

I nodded. "I know you don't know…but what bothered Bella before, what'd made her depressed, will never come back," I spoke of Jake. "If it does…like in her head, I'd like to help her through it—through everything."

"I'm afraid all you'll do is enable her erratic behavior. Fuck. I should have sent her to a doctor—"

"Talk to her. We'll talk to her and send her now. What harm could it do?"

He hissed, staring at the ground. "Now Alice is all . . . on my ass. Youse two haven't even been together a week, and Alice is talking about marriage."

"Watch she don't try to get pregnant."

"Christ!" He held his forehead. "Wait…You think Bella was trying? I know she likes babies—"

"No," I said that honestly. "It happened—we weren't thinking."

"You were thinking." He nodded. "With your cock."

"Touché." I toasted to that.

"Could be worse," he laughed. "I could'a been stuck with that other douchebag." Even if he didn't say his name, I reacted, just having him brought up . . . Maybe I was still recovering from what happened, too.

"What are you up to tonight?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"Eh…Ali's staying after Bella leaves. I thought we'd just chill out, but…she invited Rosalie and Emmett over."

"That's what's up." I nodded. "You talking to Em again."

"It's whatever." He grumbled.

I laughed. "Why you always so pissy? Lighten up a little. You're making money now. You're getting laid," I whispered that last one. "What do you have to complain about?"

"You broke my nose." He pointed to it.

"You—" I stopped, shaking my head. "I'm not getting into that." I also remembered what Colleoni said and what Riley might have been hinting at, and Jasper's doing CJ's books . . . "Listen—"

He cut me off. "My bad for coming ova like that, but fuck. You lied to me."

"I'm sorry, Jazz." And I truly was. "I said I'd be straight with you—"

"Just…forget it." He slumped back against the counter. "I got a constant headache."

"Lay off the beer," I said. "But listen—"

"I had a long day." He used his Heineken as an icepack.

I chuckled. "Do me a favor, okay? I know we're not getting along like we used to…and I can't answer any of your questions." I leaned to whisper in his ear. "Stay away from CJ…lay low, don't even go near the dry cleaners."

He pursed his lips, contemplative.

"I can't tell you what's up because_ I_ don't even now." I was honest. "God forbid anything…and don't even tell Alice anything—nothing."

He nodded, keeping his gaze low. "I'll busy myself at Sal's…I don't gotta meet Ceej until Monday—"

"Don't." I had a feeling that whatever was gonna happen might happen Monday. "Fake sick…just lay low, bro. Do something with Alice." CJ doesn't give a fuck about what Jazz does as long as his sister is happy.

"All right," he agreed, his gaze curious.

"But don't tell no one I told you that shit. Just pretend I didn't say shit." I shook my head.

He nodded.

"And can you be easy? Maybe lay off _me_ a little…? When it comes to _your_ sister?" I smiled, hoping to change the subject once again.

"Yeah," he sighed. "It's just—it's a lot to adjust to."

"But we're cool?" I hoped.

He widened his arms and pulled me in for a hug, making me smile wide. "Oh…you strapped?" he asked.

"Yeah, why?" I leaned away.

"You're gonna need it." He stared behind me.

Turning to Bella, I tilted my head—my eyes going from her stilettos, up her legs, and then up her torso to her eyes.

The dress she wore wasn't that short at the store, I swore to Christ it wasn't, but I could be mistaken.

She was gorgeous—the violet fabric hugging every single curve. Her hair was down, curls flowing along her shoulders and around her huge hoop earrings.

Bella had to wear the purple one, which was worse than the black one—sexier because it masked nothing. Whereas the black dress didn't make…anything pop?

"What do you think?" She twirled in a circle.

I thought the vein in my forehead was gonna burst.

"Edward…?" She put her hand on her hip.

"You—wow."

"Thanks." She gave me a toothy grin, looking adorable. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah, where's your coat?" I asked, walking to the door to meet her.

"It's still nice out and this has long sleeves." She placed a piece of gum in her mouth. "Want?"

"But you're pregnant. You might catch a cold." I nodded.

"I didn't think of that." She went to the hall closet.

I didn't even know if my words were true—what I'd said, but I thanked God that Bella agreed with me.


	80. Chapter 80

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty**

Another reason why we were at her house: I was borrowing Jasper's hoop-dee for our date tonight, and it sucked.

Bella and I were decked out to the max, arriving at the expensive five-star restaurant in a beat-up Honda.

When I helped Bella out of the car, I realized I forgot to get her some flowers.

We weren't off to the best start.

But I cheered up again when we were seated right away.

I thought it'd be my luck, and we'd have to wait for a table.

Bella didn't even look at her menu. "I'm in the mood for steak."

"You got it." I thought that sounded good. "I'll have the same—"

"Or should I get chicken and we can share?"

"Uh…" I didn't give a fuck as I scooted closer to her. "Have I told you how beautiful you look?"

She smiled and her cheeks reddened. "You look…amazing." She eyed me.

"Come here." I placed my arm around her, nuzzling my nose into her hair. She smelled fantastic, wearing perfume tonight.

"That tickles," she whispered.

I placed a soft kiss down on her neck.

"Good evening…" The server came to interrupt my game.

We ordered our food, asking for the same thing, and Bella definitely ordered with her eyes. She wanted all these appetizers, but I wasn't going to deny her. Every time she asked if I liked something better than something else, trying to settle on one dish, I insisted she get whatever she wanted...no matter how much she protested.

She's gotta feed the baby, too…however that works.

And I wanted to spoil her.

I wanted Bella to have whatever she wanted.

"I heard they have the best food here."

"You've never been?" I asked.

"Nope…I applied for a waitress position, but I had no experience."

"Okay."

Maybe we were past first-date-speak since we were stuck for conversation. Silence fell upon us.

While I was comfortable with such a development, Bella wasn't. She asked me a whole mess of questions that . . . I was more than certain she knew the answers to most already.

"What's your favorite TV show?" she asked.

"I…don't have one," I laughed. "Does that make me a weirdo? I just channel surf, hoping to get lucky."

"Are you hoping that tonight?" Her hand grazed my cock; she rubbed me over my slacks. "'Cause before—" she nipped my earlobe "—that was so hot. The way you yoked that guy up. Oh my God." Bella was bold tonight, it seemed.

"I thought…" I honestly thought she didn't like that behavior—me being an animal, me losing my temper and roughing someone up. "You weren't scared?"

"No…you took charge. He won't bother you again because…now he has your respect." She sucked the skin just under my ear. "I dunno what's wrong with me…but I thought it was sexy. Is it wrong to think that was hot?"

I grunted, my face falling into her hair, trying to mask the shear pleasure she was giving me. "You really weren't scared?" I placed my hand on her thigh, giving it a squeeze before I trailed it up.

"No," she whispered, her legs uncrossing.

I bit my lip, enjoying the smoothness of her skin—how it became impossibly softer the higher my fingertips went.

"I feel safe when I'm with you."

"Good." I nudged her nose with my own, lifting my head to get those lips.

My mouth barely touched hers when the waiter brought the fried calamari over.

Sadly, I couldn't compete with it.

It'd caught my attention, too.

I was fucking starving.

"You like this, right?" Bella served me a healthy portion.

"Delicious," I said, stuffing a big one—tentacles and all—into my mouth.

"The kind you have at Sal's—it's always rubbery," she commented.

"What would you do differently?" I asked.

"What?" She chewed, quirking a brow.

"I'm not interested in . . . managing Sal's at all, and Jasper…he's only hangin' on until he finds another job somewhere."

"But he's working for CJ," she said.

I nodded. "Yeah, he does that, too. You think the seafood we have on the menu should be fresher?"

"It was just a comment." Her face fell. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"

"Baby, I'm trying to make the place better." I massaged the back of her neck. "Thank you."

She grinned. "You're welcome…but I'd just take it off the menu. How many people order it?" She went back to the food.

The waiter brought over the mozzarella sticks and the stuffed clams.

"Oh, these look good." She tried to feed me.

As the meal wore on, she_ kept_ trying to feed me, fixed my plate. It was like she couldn't help herself, wanting to do everything but chew the food for me.

I thought it was cute—her wanting to take care of me—so I let her.


	81. Chapter 81

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-One**

Twenty minutes later, the waiter cleared the plates and brought our salads.

"I can't." Bella patted her belly.

"What?" I leaned back to stare at her. "You can't stop now."

"I'm gonna be sick—"

I jumped out of my chair, thinking she was going to toss her cookies.

"Damn…" She had an attitude. "I meant, I'm stuffed."

"Oh…" I sat back down.

Bella scrunched her nose. "Can we get the rest to-go?"

"We can do that."

The idea of us leaving early excited me.

After dropping off Jasper's car, we stopped by my place to put the food inside. But then Bella wanted to take a walk—walk off all the food we'd eaten.

She moaned and groaned, holding her stomach, yet she didn't want go back home and lie down.

I humored her, holding her close on the windy, mid-September evening.

"Let's go in." She jumped out of my arms.

"What?" I was so relaxed, practically half asleep, resting my head to hers as we walked.

"Ice cream," she said. "I could go for something sweet."

"Oh…" I gestured to the Carvel. "Me too."

She ordered chocolate.

I got vanilla, when I'd rather lick her.

Overall, it was a decent compromise.

No complaints from me.

On our way back to my house, I held Bella's hand. "Thanks for coming out with me."

"It's the least I could do…date ya." She winked.

I pulled her into me. "Adorable."

"You don't think I'm annoying? Like, I'm—"

"No." I snorted, opening the door for her.

"You can tell me."

"I'm not falling into that trap." I nudged her inside.

"I know I'm young…I can act immature." She stared at me. "My emotions are always everywhere, and I'm trying to be better."

"Shhh." I placed my lips to hers, wondering where this was coming from.

"With you…I always have so much fun, more fun than I've ever had my whole life," she whispered. "You make me forget all the bad stuff, and—I don't know. I do feel safe with you, and I love that I can relax with you. I can be me, and I don't have to worry about anything…We can take walks, talk, and have ice cream…we can hang out. I've never…" She wrapped her arms around my neck. "I've never been on a date before either. You treat me like a lady…I-I don't know what I'm saying." She frowned.

"Take your time." I nuzzled my nose to hers, which made her smile wide. "I'm listening."

"Tonight was great—special."

"It was…" My hands stopped in the middle of her back.

"You have a nice tub upstairs."

"I do." I tilted my head, tossing her hair back to kiss down her neck.

"The one we have isn't as deep."

"Mine's old—cast iron. Same model from when I was a kid," I said, nibbling the top of her ear since that god-awfully large earring obstructed her lobe.

She hummed, moving her head to the side, granting me more of her skin.

I'd kiss down, come up, and then blow into her ear. I know when she's done that to me, I'd wanna scream. "You want me to run you a bath?" I whispered.

"Yes," she breathed, her grip on my biceps tight. "You'll join me?"

"What?" I made her look at me. "What'd you say?" My heart skipped a beat.

She laughed. "It's big enough…take a bath with me?"

"I—" I started for the stairs, pointing, and tripping up a step. "I'll get it ready."

I ran—like a lunatic, I ran for the bathroom to fumble with the knobs.

Once the water was perfect, I put the drain stopper in.

As I started to undress, I realized I had none of those bubbles that Bella likes.

I took my shampoo and tried to pour some directly into the stream of water flowing down—create that bubble-effect.

It worked for the most part but not many formed.

Then I tested the light but it was too dark when I shut it off.

And I didn't have any candles . . .

Stepping out into the hall, I saw that if we left that light on, and the bathroom door open, it'd give us a dim-like glow…something sexy to put her in the mood.

When the water was almost to the top, I turned it off.

"Bella?" I called, entering my bedroom. "No…" She was face down on the bed with her shoes still on. "Hey…" I nudged her.

She moaned. "Bellyache."

"No, you wanted a bath. Remember?"

She rolled over, holding her stomach. "Too tired. We can just—"

I cringed, knowing she'd forget about it if she was turned on. "You should get up…move around? You'll feel better."

She grimaced in sleep. "We can…you know. I'm just tired."

"There's bubbles . . ." My fingers crawled up her forearm.

"Oh…I know you wanna do it. It's okay." She rolled onto her back. "I'm just sleepy." She yawned. "But I know you…" She bit her lip, staring at me. "We can."

"What?" I almost shouted, which was more of an exclamation. "Bella, baby, I'm not gonna have sex with you while you sleep...If you don't want to." I shook my head, wondering what the fuck was going through hers.

"You can," she said, and she was awake now. "I'm up." She reached under her dress for her panties.

I stopped her.

Needless to say, I wasn't in the mood anymore. "That's not okay, remember…? _You_ have to want it. You—"

My heart broke just a little bit. "We kiss, we get into it…we let passion take over." I shrugged, at a loss. "Remember? Remember that night? You kissed me, and we…just couldn't stop? You said it was all right and we continued…But there really wasn't much to think about because we both wanted each other so bad?" I didn't know what to say.

"Oh…I know." She yawned again. "I'm up now." Bella grabbed my hand, smiling. "Come to bed..._I_ want to. _I _miss you—"

"You're tired…You should sleep." I took her heels off.

"But—"

I covered her with the blanket. "It's totally cool. I usually don't put out on a first date anyway."

She giggled. "You're lying."

I winked, reaching to rub her back. "Close your eyes, baby."

Bella hummed, a grin on her lips as she settled down.

When she was asleep, I went downstairs to eat my dinner and flip through the channels.


	82. Chapter 82

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Two**

**S**unday morning, I woke up wearing a smile.

Sure, not much happened this weekend—what with having to lay low due to Colleoni's orders, and with Bella and me taking things easy.

Staying home didn't bother me.

And just because no business was to be conducted didn't mean we were prisoners. Yesterday, Bella and I stayed busy. For most of the afternoon, we packed up her bedroom to move her into my place.

She truly didn't have that much stuff, only personal effects and shit like that.

Then we stopped at Sal's to have a few slices and check in with Jasper. Business was slow, which could be because Colleoni told others to keep to themselves.

No one was out, except CJ.

I peeped him entering the dry cleaners with Marcus, but there was no sign of Riley.

Actually, Jasper heard something from Alice about Riley's wife being sick, and Riley had to take care of the baby. That was more than likely a story he told whomever.

Last I spoke to Riley, he was just chillin' at his house. He'd called to make sure I was staying low-key.

And I wanted to ask what the big deal was, but I didn't.

If I'm to know…someone will tell me.

Nevertheless, all signs pointed to CJ since he was out and about. A few others were, too—I spied Marcus a few times, along with Caius and a couple from his crew.

And I saw all that during the twenty minutes it took Bella and me to eat dinner.

After we ate, I borrowed Jasper's car so we could drive out to Walmart.

We bought kitchen shit, and some things for the bathroom, and random crap, and some food.

Bella kept asking me my opinion, but I didn't have one.

I didn't really care, as I was all-too-happy just to be shopping with her—for _our_ place.

Last night, we came home to set everything up, unpack Bella's things, and I fell asleep on the couch again.

At around three a.m., I woke up to Bella curled up next to me, and then I brought us both to bed.

Everything was going great—so far, so good.

I could bitch and moan, seeing as I have a live-in, pregnant girlfriend and we've yet to have sex, but no.

I've been keeping myself in check. I'm waiting for Bella.

Whenever she's ready…

Sighing, I left the bed to go to the bathroom, piss, and brush my teeth.

As I made my way downstairs, I smelled coffee and bacon in the air. All of which made me smile wider, and then I smiled the widest I could when I heard Bella giggling.

She was on the phone while she flitted about the kitchen.

"Morning." I landed a smooch on her cheek.

She squealed another giggle, surprised, I guess. "You startled me."

"Sorry." I helped myself to some coffee.

"Yeah…Edward's up." Bella sounded so happy, and then she gasped. "I can't—I can't ask him that." She continued to laugh.

Curious, I turned, mug in hand. "What's up?" I knew she was talking to Alice.

Bella shook her head. "Alice, no! I can't."

I pulled Bella into my side. "You can ask me anything." I kissed her hair.

Her face was beet red, and I was able to hear Alice running her mouth. "I can't."

I rolled my eyes and then tickled her side. "Now I have to know…"

Bella laughed so hard, wincing away from me to place her phone flat to her chest. "Alice wants to know…"

I raised a brow.

"Jasper…he won't do something." Bella looked down to the phone, and we were able to hear Alice shouting, trying to get her attention.

"What?" I asked.

Bella blew out a breath, lifting her cell. "Forget it!" She told Alice as she shut off the stove. "It's embarrassing."

Getting a kick out of this now, I grabbed the phone. "Hello?"

"Edward!" Bella jumped for her cell.

_"Hey!"_ Alice was giggly, too. _"I need a guy's opinion."_

"Okay…" My eyes landed on Bella, and she was still smiling but embarrassed, forking bacon onto a plate. "Shoot," I said, staring at the bacon. It was tough, wanting to look at my gorgeous woman, but she just happened to be fucking with bacon.

_Christ. Bella and bacon, my two most favorite things. _

_"Bella should just ask you. I hear you don't do it either."_

"What's that?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

_"You don't go down on her,"_ Alice said.

Surprised, I pulled the phone away to look at it. "How's that your business?"

_"Well…don't get mad. I know Bella has issues, but, dude, she wants you. So, you need to get on that. I'm just saying."_Alice's words made me chuckle. _"She wants the dick, bro! She's just too…timid to go for it, which is bullshit."_

"Is that so?" I asked.

_"Uh-huh…But I really wanted to know if you knew why Jasper doesn't do it?"_ She huffed._ "I hint…I've even asked, and he just won't. Do you know why?"_

I shook my head. "We don't talk about that shit. I have no idea."

_"Why don't you do it?"_ Alice laughed.

I paused, grinning. "I've done it. Maybe I haven't done it a lot. But it's…something I enjoy." My gaze landed on Bella, and she composed her smile to stare back at me. "I-I haven't done it in a while, but…yeah. I love it." And I didn't care if Alice was listening because I was talking more to Bella. "My woman tastes amazing." From what I remember, when Bella touched herself and let me taste her that time—from what I know, I thought. "Bella's sweet—"

_"Ugh!"_ Alice groaned. _"I meant, like, how do I get Jasper to do it?"_

"You, um—" Bella licked her lips, taking slow steps toward me. "You think—"

When she was close enough, I ended the call with Alice and placed the phone down, quick to take Bella's hand into mine. "What's up?"

Her face was still flushed. "You remember?"

I pushed her hair back. "Everything. I think about that night every day." I bent low to nip her lips.

Bella deepened the kiss fast, molding herself to my body, moaning into my mouth.

Once again, I tried to rein myself in—not get carried away—but my hands roamed up and down her back. "Let me," I whispered, nervous. "We-we don't hafta go all the way. Just let me taste you—get you off. It's not going to hurt." I'd bet money she'd enjoy it. "I promise…you'll like it."

Bella nodded. "You can—Edward, you can—I've never—" She was having a hard time speaking between pants. "I want you to. We have to." She gripped my shirt so tight her knuckles were white. "Anything…I want it all, all of you." Bella gulped, her hands rubbing up my chest.

Her touch…her words…I was able to smell her shampoo, her hair just under my nose . . . I fucking growled, which scared _me!_

"I'm ready," she whispered. "I think I've been ready." Bella pressed her tits into my abs.

I nodded, needing to pause a second—stop the world while I calmed down just a little bit.


	83. Chapter 83

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Three**

It's funny how times before this, when I thought Bella and I would finally get down to business, I was always so eager.

I was always down, ready to go…

Whether it was to rush and light some candles, fix a bathtub, or whatever—I'd rush to do it.

This time, however, I _knew_ it was going to happen.

There was no fanfare, no rushed, frantic kissing as of yet.

My heart pounded away; I heard it in my ears as I held Bella's hand, leading us back up to our bedroom.

I knew she was nervous, too.

But…being nervous was okay.

I was afraid she might be scared, although she says she's ready…

When we entered the bedroom, we kind of got stuck. I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to kiss her silly, get us going, but Bella had a different idea.

She crawled onto the bed to lie in the middle.

I smirked at her. "Now I'm supposed to just jump at ya?" I joked, hoping to lighten the mood.

Bella giggled. "You were just standing there."

I sat on my side of the bed, pulling her into my arms. "If at any point…you want me to stop—"

"I won't," she whispered, staring at my mouth. "Never."

I placed my hand on the side of her face, rubbing my thumb along her cheek.

Gazing into her eyes, I saw so much—it was as though I was able to see her love for me shining bright, her passion, her…everything. "I love you," I whispered.

She grinned, resting her hand on mine. "I love you, too—so much, Edward."

I knew that. I knew she did as I nodded, closing the distance between our mouths.

Our kiss was slow and yet deep, tongues tangling, twirling, tasting…

My chest felt tight, my stomach filled with butterflies, and I was just excited—we got this far, this was happening, Bella trusts me, Bella loves me.

When she moaned, pulling us back so I'd hover over her, I stopped to take off my shirt.

Bella's chest was heaving as she watched me, and then she reached for me again at the same time I grasped the hem of her T-shirt. "Um…" She turned away from me.

I took my hands back. "What's wrong?"

She swallowed, her gaze focusing on her hands. "It was dark...last time."

"What?" I turned her chin to face me.

"The last time we fooled around…it was dark, and the time before that…when you saw me…do-do you, um." She shook her head. "When we did it on the stairs…it was dark and I wasn't—Can I just keep it on?" She glanced to the drawn shade, the sun coming through the window.

I moved closer to her. "I want to see you." I kissed her cheek, letting my lips linger before they trailed down her neck. "You're beautiful…light, dark…doesn't matter. The night we shared, baby, it was so, so special. But we rushed. I wanted you so bad."

I nibbled her earlobe, and she shuddered. "I wish I could have taken my time…made you feel good." I pushed her hair away from her neck—running my nose from her ear to her collarbone, placing random kisses.

"I wanna see you. Please…trust me." I pleaded.

"I do." She squeezed my thigh. "I'm silly…You already saw me that day when, you know, after, um—"

I didn't know what to say about the day I saw her, after what that monster did. I could, however, tell her the truth. "I wasn't looking…not that day. I was worried, angry. I wasn't looking. That's not what I remember."

Of course, I remembered her; curled in a ball, crying, naked, and bruised, but that's not all I see when I look at her. "You're gorgeous—all of you." I tugged on the bottom of her t-shirt, slowly bringing it over her head.

She hugged herself, keeping her head down. "I'm nervous."

As much as I wanted to look at her chest, I didn't. "Why?" I trailed my finger along her cheek so she'd meet my gaze. "It's just me, Bella-Boo…It's Eddie Spaghetti."

"My Eddie." She touched my face, only to wince and take her hands back. "What's wrong with me?" She covered her eyes with her palms. "I wish—every day I wish I could be that girl, the girl on the stairs? The one who knew what she wanted and went for it? I was so—"

"You are," I said, scooting to sit next to her.

"I want to be sexy—"

"Bella, baby, you are." I felt like I was about to cry, needing her to believe that. "You're perfect. You're beautiful…" I turned her to me again, placing my lips to hers.

Bella kissed me back, the vigor of our kiss going from slow to fast, and then she undid her self-hug to place her arms around me, relaxing while we kissed. Having her bare chest flush against mine—how warm she was—made those butterflies go nuts again.

We were making out for an immeasurable amount of time; my lips were actually starting to feel sore, and I was so worked up—about to come in my pants if she so much as grazed my cock.

My hands roamed down her sides, and she shivered in my arms as my fingers pulled on the waistband of her sweats. Soon, my whole hands entered her pants to grasp her ass, pull her closer, a groan escaping me.

When Bella whimpered, I remembered myself—pulled back. "I'm—" I panted, staring down at her.

But Bella was fine.

That was a good whimper.

Her arms were still around my neck, there was pure lust in her gaze, and she was fine with what I was doing.

I was also able to see her breasts; she let me see them, pushing her tits out just a bit.

They were perfect.

Everything about this girl was perfect, and I marveled at her, wanting to touch her everywhere.

"I'm okay," she whispered, pulling my face back to hers.

A grunt fell from my mouth when her hand ran down my back, sneaking that paw into my pants to palm my ass. She was trying to pull me closer, get me on top of her.

I complied, easing my hips between her thighs, and I bent low to touch the tip of my nose to her nipple.

Bella squirmed, her back arching.

And I sucked her nipple into my mouth, groaning as my lower half rubbed against hers.

"Oh…" Bella was shaking, weaving her fingers into my hair. "Oh my God."

I grinned before I left her again. She tried to keep me there, but she was going nuts because I was playing with her breasts.

_Hey, I could spend all day there . . ._

And this wasn't about me.

Lying on my side next to her, I kissed her lips and then my kisses went lower while my fingertips lightly grazed her stomach. Then my mouth latched onto her nipple, suckling it as my fingers tweaked, pinched, and pulled at the other.

And I kept at that for quite a while.

And she went fucking insane.

I loved it.

That she loved it.

That she was letting me.

That I could show her what sex—making love—is all about.

"Ed-Edward, please—" she whined, squirming and grabbing my hand.

"What?" I was out of breath, too, trying so hard not to—

"Just—" She crashed her mouth to mine, and our teeth knocked together before she stuck her tongue down my throat. Bella yanked two handfuls of my hair, which spurred me on—got me even more excited. "I need—I need—"

I grunted when she bit my neck. "What?"

She placed my free hand into her panties; she just put it there. "Touch me—" But she didn't give me the chance to.

Bella seemed to be in frenzy as she took her sweats and panties off, all while she left her eyes closed, rushing to come back to me.

My body stiffened, and I wanted to close my eyes, needing to calm down. "Perfect," I mumbled against her skin, kissing her stomach as my hand ran down her thigh.

She moaned, spreading her legs.

"Can I…?" I kissed her hip, my lips going lower. "You can-you can—" I was tongue-tied, my eyes on the prize.

"Don't stop," she whispered, her hand landing on my back.

The contact made me shiver, and she was already trembling; meanwhile, we hadn't done anything yet.

On my knees, I crawled to get between hers. Bella still had her eyes closed, while that blush went all the way down to her chest. "Look at me."

Her breath caught as she did, giving me this slight nod, and there was no fear in her gaze.

Getting on my stomach, I grabbed her waist to pull her closer, which made her legs fall farther apart.

Bella was naked, bare—exposed—open for me.

She was gorgeous with all of her curves, her body God's most gracious creation, and I could have stared at her all day.

And she had no idea.

Bella didn't know, and that killed me.

"I love you…" I said it again, and I'd say it again and again until she believed me, until she loved herself, too.

Until she loves herself as much as I do.


	84. Chapter 84

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Four**

Bella was soaked, and so fucking warm, as my finger ran up and down her slick lips—my mouth kissing the inside of her thigh. Every time I'd touch her clit, she'd shudder, shake, and moan, but she was getting impatient.

First she was afraid.

Then she was excited, and now…

"Edward, you're killing me," she cried out in pleasure.

Inhaling her sweet scent, my tongue came out to lick her clit.

"Oh!" Like a fish on dry land, Bella jumped, which made me smile.

My hand spanned her stomach, remembering to be gentle, as my lips nestled deeper into her.

I groaned, lapping at her delicious pussy, and then I lightly sucked on her clit—my finger entering her to twirl circles.

Meanwhile, Bella was huffing, puffing, and stiffening as she kept moaning—mumbling words I couldn't decipher.

I thought I was going to die—to be honest—my cock so hard I thought it might atrophy and just fall off.

As a boy and then as a man, I've been with women; I've had sex…

But just like Bella didn't know the real deal before this, neither did I.

Every moan was for me. Every cry of joy, every quake her body made . . .

"Edward!" she shrieked, pulling my hair and clamping her thighs closed while her pussy milked my finger.

She was coming, and I increased the pressure on her clit, which drove her wild.

"Oh…oh!" Her body shook and then she stilled to stare down at me while she panted. "Edward…." Bella's words caught in her throat, and she sounded emotional now.

I sat back on my calves, rubbing her thighs. "That was good?" My heart was threatening to beat out of my chest—like I said, I swore I was about to keel over and die, too many feelings flashing through me; I felt too much.

"That was . . . Oh my God. That was . . ." She blew out a breath, fanning her face. "I'm not gonna cry."

I slumped my shoulders.

"That was amazing. So amazing. I don't know-know what to say." She gulped, holding her heart. "That was—"

I nodded, crawling to her side. "Good." I kissed her neck.

When I went to pull back, Bella had different plans. She grabbed the waistband of my boxers and pulled them off me. My cock hurt when it bounced off my abs, but I gave no indication that it did.

But when Bella reached for my dick—

"Don't touch it!" I winced, knowing I'd blow my load if she so much as smiled at it, and I hated to cheapen our moment—our beautiful morning. "Just—"

"What?" She took her hands back.

"Gimme a minute," I begged.

Her eyes were wide. "It's so hard…" She had wonder in her tone.

I nodded; it hurt, too. "One minute…lay back." I'd eat some pussy again, but I wasn't sure if that'd help my problem or make it worse, make me come on the sheets.

All I knew was that I wanted to keep satisfying her.

And I tried my best to think about some bullshit. Like my beautiful car that was towed away a few days ago. The glass I had to sweep up in my driveway. I no longer had a kick-ass whip.

Insurance is being a pain in my ass—

"Edward?" Bella kissed along my chest.

I opened my eyes, and my cock was still—

"Edward—" she smirked and bit my chin, her hard nipples rubbing against my chest "—but I want _you_ now." She pulled my shoulders. "I need to feel you." Bella was serious.

"I—" Now, I was scared, although I wanted to so badly. "I just—"

Bella cut me off with a kiss, and she used all her strength to get me on top of her. It didn't take much; I went willingly.

"It's not…going to be great." Embarrassed, knowing I wasn't going to last long; I kissed her forehead. "But—"

"It's you…It'll be wonderful." She grabbed my cock to line us up, and I growled out—resting my hands on either side of her head, nearly falling on top of her.

"You're sure?" I had to clear my throat.

"I've never been more sure." Her voice was emotional again. "We can do this every day—as many times a day. The way you make me feel." She moaned, leaning up to kiss my chest and buck her hips.

My cock hit something wet and warm, and by the way Bella gasped, I guessed it was her clit.

But this was it . . .

And even if my heart was in my throat—so fucking nervous—my heart also swelled, which made me incredibly happy.

Shit. I was emotional, too.

"Bella…" I looked into her eyes, resting my forehead to hers as I pushed forward.

Every muscle in my body tightened, and I hissed, never having felt anything better.

Bella stiffened, her mouth wide as she gasped, clawing at me when I entered her.

The world stopped at that moment.

And I didn't move.

"You okay?" I could barely breathe.

Bella nodded, smiling up to me. "I'm whole now…You feel so good."

"You-you have no idea...how good—" I fell deeper inside her, and my eyes rolled. "You're incr-incredible." I blew out a large breath, sucking another in as I started to move.

"Yes…" Bella hugged me tightly to her, her nails digging into my back.

And it was already too much, feeling my orgasm come to a head.

I stopped. "I—"

Bella moaned, rocking against me and bucking her hips with force. "I'm fine. Don't stop—"

Gritting my teeth together, I gathered her into my arms, resting my forehead to her shoulder as my hips picked up a rhythm, my thrusts going slow to fast until I roughly slammed into her once, twice, three times—going as deep as I could, fucking balls-deep to lose my shit.

I came, swearing I was having a heart attack at the same time.

I came so fucking hard, there was a ringing in my ears, and I thought I'd gone blind, but then I opened my eyes.

I came so fucking hard, if Bella wasn't pregnant, I probably would have knocked her up.

_Hell, that's probably what happened the first time. _

And I had no time to recover, too concerned for Bella. "You okay?"

Bella giggled, sitting up to kiss me passionately. "Amazing. We did it!" She was enthusiastic, seeming victorious as she pushed me down.

Weak, I rolled onto my back, taking her with me. "_You_ did it," I said.

Love shined in her gaze, and she was absolutely giddy. "You stay here." She grabbed her shirt to pull it over her head.

Little did she know, I didn't think I could move—legit stand just yet, although I managed to lean up on my elbows to look at her.

"I'll bring breakfast up here…and then we can, um, go again?" she asked.

My heart was still hammering away as I collapsed back. "S-sure, baby." I nodded. "We can…as much as you want."

She had no idea how down I was with that plan.

I just needed a few minutes to recover.

When I heard her tiny feet stomping down the stairs, I hugged a pillow to my face to chuckle into it—the happiest I've ever been—giddy like a girl, like Bella was seconds prior.


	85. Chapter 85

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Five**

After all the lovemaking—after all the kinky shit we did Sunday and Monday—when Tuesday rolled around, I realized I never gave Carlisle Senior's words much thought. I'd completely forgotten all about it.

And it wasn't hard to stay holed up at my crib because…

_Yo, we did a lot of fucking._

It was almost as though we were making up for lost time.

Well, maybe we were?

Bella was telling the truth.

She was fine with us having sex. She'd _been_ fine with us getting busy. The only uneasiness she showed was when she'd gotten naked in front of me the first time. After that—after the first time—it was smooth sailing.

She stayed naked for two days straight.

And I was able to slow my eager ass down, relax—I'm able to rock that pussy longer than sixty-seconds.

Bella's new favorite thing is sitting on my face…but she faces the wall, holds on to the headboard.

She hasn't given me a blow job yet, but I don't give a fuck.

Whenever she's ready…and if she's never ready, I don't care.

As long as she doesn't hold the rest of herself away from me.

Christ.

_I can't get enough._

Making love to my pregnant girlfriend…being in love, exploring her body…I've never been happier.

My life meant something now. I had a purpose.

But…I digress.

I forgot all about Colleoni, and whatever-the-fuck was going on. Again, I never gave his words much thought.

I didn't have to; I knew I was going to accept.

But I was only reminded of what he'd told me—had asked me to consider—when Esme called me that Tuesday morning.

She asked me to come by as soon as I could…without Bella.

That was all fine and well, but I had a meeting with CJ in an hour—and that was scheduled before Colleoni told me to stay low-key. I'd marked it on my calendar—the big sit-down with his crew—and I actually saw it while I spoke to Esme; meanwhile, no one else had tried to get ahold of me all weekend or yesterday.

I didn't voice my concern to Esme, of all people. I figured I'd call CJ on my way to his father's, and I'd make up some lie. Then, maybe I'll shoot by the cleaners afterward—I could do both before meeting Jasper at Sal's for three.

Or, I wouldn't go to the cleaners at all, depending on what Colleoni tells me.

I had no idea what was going on, but I also had to get back to business—had shit to discuss with Jasper.

Differences notwithstanding, my best friend and I had to go over a few things.

Mainly, I needed to get us—Bella—some medical insurance, and I'd do it through the pizzeria. I'd make Bella an unofficial employee until we got married. After our nuptials, I'd make it legit and let her be on mine.

The latter was neither here nor there when I couldn't figure out what the urgency to meet up with my godfather was. I had a feeling it was nothing bad, since I'd be heading to his crib.

Still alarmed, I slowly put my cell in my pocket.

"What's wrong?" Bella emptied a dish into the trash.

"Nothing, um, have you spoken to Alice…since the other day?" I knew she was staying at Jasper's for the weekend, but I hadn't seen her since I took Bella on our first date. I haven't heard from Alice since I hung up on her. She wasn't at the pizzeria when we stopped by on Sunday either.

Bella shook her head, bringing the plate to the sink. "She probably went back to her dorm room. I know she has classes today, and she called me…but we were busy," she giggled.

I nodded, smiling. "I gotta head to her house. Will you be okay here?"

Bella furrowed her brow. "What about the guy delivering your new car?"

I had taken twenty minutes to recharge over the weekend and had called the car lot. I had no idea how much pull I had around the neighborhood until now. Knowing I was good for it, my car would be replaced, and that old man, Big Joey, was willing to deliver it, too.

I walked over to kiss her hair. "The guy'll probably ring the bell," I laughed, kissing along her cheek. "Just grab the keys."

She turned, wrapping her arms around my neck. "I feel a lot better after our talk—like a weight has been lifted."

I grinned, dipping low to get those lips.


	86. Chapter 86

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Six**

"I'm really glad that you know everything now," she whispered against my lips.

Unable to help myself, I deepened the kiss, palming her ass and groaning into her mouth.

She'll never know how happy our talk made me . . .

Late last night, we had a great conversation, after some great sex.

Bella broke some things down for me.

Most of all, she told me what's got her so down, so emotional.

After a few minutes, all I did was sit and listen, even if I knew some things already.

She spoke about Jake. Bella told me a lot, shit I didn't know, and the things she told me broke my heart. They never had a relationship. I might be clueless when it comes to them, but I know all the things he did were wrong. He treated her like a dog, his dog, or whore—constantly forced himself on her, and she never had a voice.

I'd had an idea what had happened, but…

Bella misses her grandmother.

She wants to make Jasper happy by applying herself to something. She doesn't want him to worry about her anymore.

When Bella got to speaking about me…that was a mind-fuck and a half.

She said it started when I came to town—her attraction to me. That's what started it. Also, she'd constantly think about our dynamic from back in the day, from knowing each other forever—the love we just have for each other without rhyme or reason.

I understood it, can't explain it either.

In the beginning, when I'd first come back to Brooklyn, Bella tried to be what I wanted.

When she knew I was looking for a hookup, she was relentless, wanting to be the woman I'd bed. I knew all of that already. I mean, once I came back, she was flirting from the first time we'd laid eyes on each other. That, and if she was around me—especially if he was with her—Jake wouldn't cross any lines. I was the ultimate cockblocker, which I'm grateful for now. I just wish Bella said something sooner, so that last time would have never happened?

Bella-Boo—my silly, beautiful girl—actually managed to make me blush when she recalled our encounter on the stairs, the first time we had sex, when she got pregnant.

It wasn't my best performance—recent times have been much, much better—but Bella told me all about how I'd made her feel. She made me smile, made me feel like the man, like some pussy virtuoso.

Then with what happened with Jake the day after . . .

Bella went from being confused about me to being even more conflicted when that asshole attacked her. She couldn't make sense of her feelings.

And she was afraid to make the wrong move with me, scared she'd lose me.

I was afraid to make the wrong move with her, too . . .

Funny, since by that time, she had me.

Bella felt weird and/or guilty going after me because of what happened with Jake. She thought I and everyone else, would think her a whore or a slut…

Bella changed who she was, became even more depressed and unsure about the future.

She found out she was pregnant…

I left…

_I moved down the fucking block._

But, anyway, when she finally broke it all down, I was dumbfounded.

She calls herself weak, while I can't imagine anyone going through all that she has and still be standing.

Most others would be curled up under a bar somewhere.

Yeah, she had it rough after I left, trying to make sense of a million emotions, trying to figure out different ways to be…without exploding.

So, she'd cry, which was her only outlet because she couldn't find her voice.

For nearly three hours, I sat with her and listened, and my only hope was that she'd be okay.

She's got me. I'm not going anywhere, but Jasper was correct.

With or without me, Bella should be able to live.

I can't make heads or tails of that because I don't _want_ to be without her.

I had no one before—no one who cared about or loved me. Now I'm back home, and I have a chance to be happy. I've been blessed. I'm starting to look at Bella's pregnancy as a blessing.

I never had a family before.

But Bella and the baby would be mine.

Together, we'll grow, sort through her problems, maybe mature, and hopefully…hopefully there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Hopefully, I can help her out of this deep depression, because that's what I firmly believe it is . . . although she doesn't seem depressed as of very recent.

Sure, I make her happy. Bella's excited about the pregnancy, the baby. Nowadays, she loves rolling around the sheets with me, but I can't be around 24/7.

And there are times when her mind wanders. I see this vacant look on her face, and I know her head is stuck on something.

Jasper called me a quick fix, something that'll make her happy, but I _can't _take all her demons away.

But…God, help me, I'm going to try. I'm going to do my best to help her heal.

Jake is dead, and Bella knows that, but she has scars that are invisible to the naked eye…scars he branded her with.

And I wished I could bring him back to life…just so I could fucking kill that motherfucker again.

Maybe nothing monumentally fucked-up happened—except for her encounter, her _whole _relationship with Jake—but everything she said was heavy; Bella has a lot of issues while she's also very immature.

And she explained it by saying…She feels like she's buried, and she's constantly trying to crawl her way out.

Her innocence, lack of life experience, combined with all the fucked-up shit that's happened, has left her confused as fuck.

Bella has no coping mechanisms either . . . besides shedding a bunch of tears.

I promised myself I'd always be understanding when she starts to cry—from now on—because I know better now.

We'll get through it together.

Bella's my woman now.

But before that—before any of it, she was my friend, someone I cared for deeply.

Sure, I'm more than positive we're both still very confused, confliction underlying the strong feelings we have for one another. But how lucky am I? To be able to have such a connection with someone I already cared for?

I have a family now in Bella, and soon we'll have a baby . . .

And the sex is phenomenal . . .

I can't get enough.

_Seriously._

But after a day of our staying in bed…I did ask her to talk to me, break shit down, and I felt better knowing—happy that she finally trusts me, with her body, her heart, and, now, her story.

"I feel a lot better, too," I answered her, gazing into those eyes. Right now, they're bright with excitement, when I know underneath lies sadness. "You're gonna be okay here alone, right?"

I've yet to leave her alone since…since I came home drunk that one night, which was like five days ago. Before that, she was an emotional wreck—hardcore, when she wasn't bathing or eating, as per Jasper—and I was worried about leaving her alone.

Although, I hope she knows I'll be back in just a couple of hours.

Soon, I'll have to get back out there and work, too.

"Yeah," she said. "What should I do?"

I smiled, shaking my head.

As the days pass, I get the distinct possibility that Bella likes it when I make decisions _for_ her. No matter how many times we've had sex since the other day, she doesn't initiate it. As we'd get more comfortable, she'd ask me what I wanted her to do—where I wanted her.

And if I don't answer, wanting her to do what_ she_ wants, she actually gets upset.

But that's what happened . . . why we weren't making love.

All that time, while she _was_ ready, Bella was waiting for me to make a bold gesture.

I still feel like a fucking idiot about that, about not opening my mouth.

"You could watch TV…? Give this brain a break." I pushed her hair behind her ears. "Take a bath . . . or you can search the web? I don't know."

What I do know is that I decided to take the pressure off of her, told her not to look for work while she's pregnant. There's no point. Well, she could find something, but she said she'd help me with the pizzeria.

And . . . I've come into my new role, all too well.

I'm to be her husband, a future father, and my job is to take care of them. My mother never worked—I remembered that. When my parents were together, my pop used to bring home the bacon while Mom would stay home—keep the house.

Shit. As long as Bella's happy, I don't give a fuck what she does.

She knows the deal, growing up around here…She doesn't ask questions about _my work _either.

Her eyes widened. "Do you want lasagna for dinner? I'll go to the market—"

"Whatever you wanna do." I backed away to put my boots on, and I noticed her frown.

"Or…did you want chicken, or—"

"Lasagna sounds amazing, baby." I winked.

"Cool." She smiled again.

I let out a breath, grabbing for a hoodie.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" I searched for my keys.

Bella picked them up from the counter, held them out for me.

"Thanks." I pecked her lips.


	87. Chapter 87

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Seven**

"Um…" Bella fiddled with the dishrag. "I have to tell you something else."

"Go 'head," I encouraged, taking her hand. "Say whatever."

"I feel—I feel useless sometimes. No job, no skills…I wish I was smarter. You know?" She wasn't crying, which was a feat in and of itself, although her words broke my heart again. "I wanna do right by you, make you happy. I'll do the laundry, too." She sucked her teeth, shaking her head. "I don't think it's coming out right—what I'm trying to say. But…I wanna be honest, and you told me to tell you when something's bothering me." She let out a nervous chuckle. "I'm dumb."

"No." I squeezed her hand. "Don't let me hear you say that about yourself again."

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Bella, baby—" I hugged her to me "—don't apologize. You did nothing wrong. Thank you…for telling me. You can tell me anything, but I don't like you putting yourself down. You're not stupid or dumb. You're perfect." I placed a loud kiss on her neck, which made her smile.

"You being happy will make me happy," I sighed. "You wanna make lasagna? Do the laundry…? Knock yourself out. You're not useless. You're not stupid. You liked babysitting, right? It's only been…maybe a month since you stopped doing it with Rosalie. Get back into it. Do something—not to make _me_ happy—but to make _you_ happy."

"Okay," she whispered.

"I mean it." I lifted her chin. "But you don't have to cook or do laundry either…Do it because you want to."

"I always do the laundry." Bella shrugged. "I used to do all of ours." She rubbed up my chest. "I love to cook, though. Especially for you." She smiled. "I get to watch you enjoy the food I make." _She _was making it sound perverted, or maybe it was my dirty mind?

I narrowed my eyes. "Don't gimme a hard-on."

She sighed. "I love doing that, too."

I snorted. "Baby, everything else? You just haven't found a groove yet. We'll figure it out."

"Thanks for being so—"

"Don't thank me," I said, and she'd never know how much…

How much I needed her at this point—just her.

It wasn't something I could accurately explain, but taking care of her—my baby Bella—gave me a purpose.

"We gotta toughen you up, though." I tickled her side. "My badass Momma." My fingers went to her belly.

"I love you, Edward." Her voice was emotional.

I leaned my forehead to hers. "I love you, too." A thought came to mind. "We have to plan a wedding soon—"

She gasped. "I thought we'd just…get married by a judge or something."

I shook my head. "Fuck, no…I want you in a white dress. I want it in a church." I palmed her ass again. "Jasper can be my best man."

"Alice will be my maid of honor," she giggled.

I nodded. "Jasper'll also give you away . . ." Another thought came to mind. "You called a doctor before, right?" I asked her to do so before I went into the shower. She doesn't have insurance yet, but that doesn't matter.

"My appointment is on Thursday at two fifteen." She smiled.

"I'll be there." I squeezed her even tighter. "You can't see it now, but we're going to be so happy…when things come together?" I felt all emotional suddenly. "Soon, I'll be making more money. We won't have _any_ worries…"

Her face fell. "I wouldn't mind if…we both had to work? You at Sal's, and I'll figure something out," she whispered. "I just have to find a job. I'll start looking tomorrow. We could be normal…like regular people. We don't have to be rich or whatever. I-I know—" Bella stopped talking, pulling out of my arms. "You're going to be late."

I turned her chin back to me. "Talk. Say what you were going to say." To me, this was more important than rushing to Colleoni's.

Tears filled her eyes. "Your business is your business—how you make money?" she said. "I grew up on this block. I know how it all works. I babysat for…for those women. I mean, Marie is always home with the baby…by herself. CJ has another apartment. Alice told me that he…he cheats on her all the time. Riley isn't faithful," she cried, gripping my hoodie. "Edward, I—"

"Shhh." I kissed her gently. "Please, relax." My hands covered hers

"The deeper you get, the more time…you won't be home. You'll be wherever with whoever, and I'd rather be poor—I'd rather we struggle paycheck to paycheck than I lose you…when it feels like I just got you!" She was ranting. "I don't know if I'd be able to look the other way. I mean, I'd do it so I wouldn't lose you, but—Edward, I—if that's going to happen…Why even get married…? No, I didn't mean that. We'll get married!" She clawed at me, frantic. "I'm sorry."

"Bella—" I held her cheeks, making her look to me "—relax." I kissed her tears. "You weren't my girl for how long? Baby, since I've been back, you're the only woman I've been with. You're _the only woman_ I wanna be with—other bitches don't compare to you, and I'm gonna fuck what we have up?" Suddenly angry—because of her lack of faith—I crashed my lips to hers.

She whimpered into my mouth, hugging me tight.

"I love you." I actually shook her so she'd get it into her head. "I'm out there…I'm making moves, hustling, making money. I'm doing jobs, what I gotta do. I swear to Christ, I won't be out there lookin' to get my fuckin' dick wet. All right? You're my woman, the only woman I wanna be with." I lifted my sweatshirt to show her the ink on my chest, my Marine tatt. "You know what this means?"

She sniffled. "No . . . I think you told me once. Sorry, I forgot." Her face threatened to crumple again. "_Semper_—something."

"Relax." I palmed her cheek, grinning. "It's okay. _Semper Fidelis_, which means Always Faithful . . . I'd never, Bella-Boo."

Bella let out a large breath. "Promise—"

"On my life," I said.

She hugged onto me again, relaxing within our embrace. "I do need to toughen up."

I cracked a grin. "We'll get there."

But like I said, Bella's a lot tougher than she looks—a lot tougher than her traitorous tears betray. Maybe she cries more now that her hormones are fucking her up, or whatever. And she doesn't have to face the world guns blazing while I'm around, which is good. I'll fight her battles while her guard is down, and she gets stronger.

She's tough . . .

She's been through a lot, and she still gets up every morning.

Bella is trying, and she's growing, and she's maturing.

And I'm just the lucky bastard who gets to be along for the ride.

**Thank you for reading.**

**Please leave me your thoughts.**

**NOTE: PLEASE READ! These last three chaps are the last E/B centered chaps for a while. We'll be getting into other things soon while time speeds on ahead. **


	88. Chapter 88

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Eight**

Without a set of wheels, I took off for Colleoni's on foot, but I was in a hurry, practically fucking running there.

On my way, I saw Jasper sweeping the sidewalk in front of the pizzeria—told him I'd check him later on.

He didn't say anything. He didn't even inquire about his sister, which was out of character for him. Especially since Bella and I have been holed up for the past few days.

Nevertheless, I let it go—had to haul ass.

Esme told me to come by as soon as possible—but she also said it wasn't emergent—yet that was over an hour ago. I didn't expect Bella to unload on me. It's not that I minded; I love that she's expressing more now, but it was bad timing.

Luckily, I got there in no time. It'd started to rain, so I walked even faster, lifting the hood on my sweatshirt.

To my surprise, when I opened the gate to his estate, there were no cars lining the driveway—none parked on the sidewalk. I've heard he's not one to conduct business at his residence, but…the place is like a compound? Just mad people coming and going, conferring about whatever the fuck.

I can't imagine him not conducting business in his home. Maybe his words were total bullshit.

The only person I saw was Aldo. He was leaning back against an idled Lincoln Town Car.

"What's up?" I slapped my hand to his.

"Not much—gotta drive the old lady up to her sister's."

"Oh." I nodded. "Everything all right?"

"As far as I know." He rocked back on his heels. "I was told not to speak to her," he whispered. "I—I don't know. Something strange's goin' on." Aldo stopped speaking when Esme left the house. He was a low-man, like me, and yet one of his only duties was to drive Esme here or there—Alice, too, on occasion.

Esme stopped to smile at me as she donned her gloves. My godmother was decked in what I'd imagine were the finest of fashions—the epitome of class with a long trench coat and shades. She reminded me of those classy broads from old movies. "Edward Anthony!" She wrapped her arms around me, reeking of booze.

"How are you?" I stepped back.

She sighed. "He's waiting for you—in the bedroom."

"Okay." When I turned back to Aldo, he helped her into the car, rolling his eyes as he did so.

"How's Bella?" she asked.

"Good." I nodded. "She sends her love."

"I'll be calling her soon," Esme said.

"Have a safe trip!" I waved.

Esme blew me a kiss.

I smiled, sighing heavily.

As the car drove away, I turned for the door and entered the house. It wasn't locked, which was odd, but then Esme saw me approaching. She probably left it open for me on purpose.

"Carlisle?" I called, hearing the echo of my voice.

Not receiving an answer, I locked the door and sought their bedroom. However, I didn't know which room was theirs.

I laughed at myself as I ascended the stairs—my head whipping every which way. "Carlisle?"

"In here," he hollered, and it sounded like it came from further down the hall.

His bedroom door was the only one open, and that should have tipped me off.

"Hey…" I took slow steps, watching him get out of bed. He was still in pajamas. "You all right?" I quickly went to his side, taking his arm.

Carlisle nodded and then coughed, hacking as he rushed to hold a tissue to his lips. "Not-nothing to concern yourself about." He cleared his throat, now on his feet.

"Okay…" My eyes traveled about the room, waiting for him to speak.

"You know…people talk—" Carlisle walked to his chest of drawers "—and it's extremely hard to keep any secrets around here." He went for a medication bottle, emptying pills into his palm. "You're a good kid." He repeated the phrase he's said a thousand times before tossing the meds into his mouth.

Carlisle cringed, swallowing them down dry. "You met my friend Joey?"

I furrowed my brow. "Joey…?" Truth be told, I'd met many Joeys over the last few months. "Which one? Big Joey from the car lot?"

"Joey…the pimp?"

"Pimp?" I countered. "Can't say I've come across any pimps."

"Eh…he's a good guy. He did me a big favor." He nodded.

I didn't have anything to say—not knowing what he was talking about.

"Keep up, Edward. I meant my buddy, Joey, who owns the club you went to with CJ—Breaking Dawn." He spoke with his hands, his tone clipped.

"The strip joint?" I nodded. "That dude's a pimp, too? Does that pay well?" I actually thought it funny.

"I don't know. I never fucked with exploiting women." Carlisle took me seriously as he got back into bed, pulling the covers over himself. "But…it's no one's place to judge how another man makes his living. You refused to help him. Why?"

"Uh…" Surprised, my eyes widened. "What he was offering didn't appeal to me. I remembered what you said…how you—" I gestured, waving a hand, not knowing how or if I could continue speaking of the matter.

I was confused as fuck. Maybe I'm a tough guy everywhere else, but Colleoni is ruthless. Colleoni might be my godfather; he might call me a good kid to my face, and then turn around to put a bullet in my back.

I'm not fucking stupid, and so I chose my words wisely. "You said shit like that was for others—not for dudes like us, like a dude I'm hoping to be one day." A made member of his family.

"My son's a shady, greedy bastard," he whispered.

Again, I remained silent.

"I told him a hundred times not to get mixed up in that shit . . ." He shook his head. "And now…" Carlisle trailed off, his eyes falling to his comforter. "Someone broke in here last night—"

"What?" I stepped closer, sitting on the edge of his bed. He'd gone from one subject to the next so quickly; I thought I should be more attentive to hear him better.

Carlisle placed his hand on mine. "I had to send my wife away…Cigno knows to look out for Mary Alice. I got word to him very early this morning." Meanwhile, Jasper was just sweeping the fucking sidewalk. I hoped Alice was at his house or something.

"If there's anything I can do—"

_"Aspettare."_ He held up a hand, telling me to wait.

I shut my mouth.

"I'm an old man…I'm sick, which is…something no one knows. My daughter doesn't even know."

"I'm sorry," I said.

"Cancer…I had it a few years back, and now…I'm doing the chemo again. I'll get through it."

I patted his back, furrowing my brow. "I bet. I'm sure you will."

"I'm seen as weak…I don't know who I can trust." He let that hang there.

Since I didn't know what he was getting at, I just waited for him to continue. But if no one knows he's sick, who sees him as weak? That was the first thing I thought of. I know chillin' with the guys, just being around the 'hood, I haven't heard a thing about it.

"It's disappointing, thinking of you can trust someone with your life—everything—and then to find out, someone that you not only trust, but love with your whole heart…" He showed me his palms.

Feeling badly about all that had happened, and yet still confused, I placed my hand in his. "If you don't wanna be alone…I mean, I don't know what happened here last night." I looked around and nothing seemed amiss "But I have extra bedrooms, and Bella's making lasagna tonight—"

He smiled and patted my cheek. "Sweet, but I'm not as bad as I look. They thought they could break in—take me out." He snorted. "Oddly enough, none of my guys were outside. Hence, I don't know who I can trust. They took off. They either knew what was going down, or they were called away—misled. I'm better off alone."

"Aldo—"

"He's young, like you…And he's been driving Esme for two years now." He shrugged. "I know he had nothing to do with it."

"Right." A few things clicked for me since I'm not a dumbass. "You were set up to be taken out last night?"

He hummed. "You passed my test."

"Which was…?" I chuckled, albeit nervously.

"You didn't take the bait. Joey, that offer, it was a setup. My son wouldn't say anything—fuck, he was set up, too." He frowned.

"He bit the line?" I whispered.

He nodded, eyes falling down again. "It's heartbreaking . . . and I know of other things he's doing, dishonorable things, things I forbid him from doing. He takes advantage, thinks he's who he is. And now that he knows that I know…"

"You…" I wanted to ask if he thought CJ put a mark on him, but that might be going too far.

"I'm having a bad day, but I'll be good tomorrow." He gave my hand a squeeze. "You'll drive me."

"You got it," I said, because it was an honor, and it was also a huge step up.

"Edward…we're like dominoes. One falls…we all follow. Remember that." He waved a finger.

"Right." My cell phone buzzed in my pocket, and I ignored it.

"What time were you supposed to meet CJ?" He looked to the clock on his nightstand. "I know you had a meeting with him."

"Fifteen minutes ago." But I didn't know if I should care. Especially since…Dude tried to set up his own father? I didn't know what to think. Then again, my godfather may not trust me, so he's not going to get into it.

He nodded. "Wait another fifteen—twenty minutes, then you can leave. Stay low key but go straight home. When you feel like dropping by, you're welcome to if you have questions—"

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked.

The man spoke in riddles.

"I never go back on my word. And I loved your father like a brother. I said I'd take care of you. I'm taking care of you, which includes shielding certain truths from you to protect you—" He coughed, leaning back against his pillows. "It's best you stay out of this conflict...now, at this time."

"Thank you," I said. "Are you hungry? Did you want me to make you anything—"

"Sandwich sounds good. You'll find it all in the kitchen."

I didn't mind making my godfather lunch. I didn't find it demeaning or anything. The guy's sick, and the thought alone saddened me because he's just back in my life . . . . While I know how cut-throat the guy is, I did hope we'd develop some type of relationship. I don't know much about cancer, but I know it's a very serious illness—a scary word.

As I made his food, my mind began to wander.

I turned down Joey and the coke deal; however, CJ did not.

They must have spoken at another time since I had no idea, and Colleoni knows about all the shit CJ's been doing.

Someone tried to take Colleoni out last night, and they were able to get close—close enough to break into his house. All of which means, if it was CJ, he wasn't acting alone.

That's obviously why I was called here first thing this morning.

But Colleoni told me to stay under the radar these past few days, Riley, too.

And if Colleoni trusts me, yet doesn't confide in anyone else—and I wasn't privy to any dealings that'd gone down recently—it meant I was alone, too, save my godfather.

I had no idea what was going on.

Colleoni hadn't given me any answers.

While he's looking out for me, I suddenly felt as though I was the odd man out—alone.


	89. Chapter 89

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Eighty-Nine**

By the time Carlisle finished eating, a half-hour had passed us.

Bella called my phone twice, but I thought it rude if I answered, and I did tell her I'd be right back. She's probably just wondering where I am. If something was wrong, and I didn't answer, she'd text me or leave a message.

Either way, rude or not, if she calls again I'm going to answer. I'd start to worry.

Otherwise, I was content to sit and watch television. Well, I was waiting for him to elaborate on anything.

"You really don't know who—I mean, I'm out there, doing shit with these guys almost every day." I was hoping he'd help me out a little. "No one's said anything about you being sick, or—"

"Dominoes." He smiled.

I thought the old man might be losing his mind. "Did you …wanna play or…?"

"No…One falls, the rest follow, like I said." He nodded, smiling at me. "I have my friends…those I keep close. My enemies have their friends, yet they're _all_ members of _my_ family. We'll be doing some late spring cleaning in the future…You'll help."

"Okay." I understood that. He'd be looking to get rid of those he couldn't trust.

"You can confide in Cigno…When things slow down, I want to sit down with him. Make it happen."

"You got it." I grinned, wondering what Jasper would do when confronted. "I don't think he's interested, but…" My best friend might consider it an honor. He's 100% Italian. His father was never anyone. I think most of his resentment stems from him not having any clout with his namesake, while holding a small grudge because his father was murdered. Jasper's dad was a scumbag, though—no need to sugarcoat.

"Thanks for keeping an old man company, but you can go now." He slapped my back, looking down to his watch.

"You need anything?" I asked.

"Nah…I need to get dressed—"

"You'll need a ride?" I raised a brow.

"Riley's coming to get me."

"Riley," I said. "You—" As far as I knew, Riley was sort of like CJ's bitch—his right hand man—while also hating his guts. If anyone was going to turn on anyone, it'd be Riley vs. CJ.

Colleoni's _consigliere_ is this dude named Michael. He's seen but rarely heard, and then there's the under boss—CJ.

Riley…he's on CJ's crew. In his words, he was looked over when CJ came home from college. Riley was supposed to have his own crew, but it went to CJ instead—something like that.

Out of the dozens of dudes Colleoni has working for him—members of the family— only the three of them: CJ, Michael, and Riley, could have gotten as close to clip the boss.

But CJ would be the only one with something to gain.

The throne.

"He's a good guy—keeps an eye on things for me, so I know what's going on."

"Oh." I nodded.

"Which was why I told CJ to make sure Riley showed you the ropes—he played both sides of the fence." He left his bed, placing his dish on the nightstand.

"You said you couldn't trust anyone." I stood up, too.

He turned back to me. "When you've been betrayed like I have, you'll feel as if you have no one. But I knew—I knew a few of my guards would miraculously take off last night. Just like I knew when and where someone was going to try and break in. How did I know that?"

"Riley," I whispered, which pretty much confirmed that CJ set his own father up.

"Yes…Rye went along for the ride. A lot of people trust Riley, but he truly is a good guy. Has Riley ever steered you wrong?" he asked.

"Nope."

He grinned. "The past few days and last night…I let the chips fall where they were supposed to, so my _own_ plans would carry through _today_. I made sure my wife and daughter were safe...but I didn't jump the gun and send them away beforehand. That would have tipped others off to my knowledge…I made sure those who were in the dark stayed outta Dodge, uninvolved . . . Relax." Carlisle stepped to palm my cheeks.

But his smile disappeared, his grip on my face tight. "Don't ever double cross me, kid. You get a taste—like the power. That's cool, but you climb the ladder by doin' right by me. I may be old. I may be sick, but my eyesight is just fine. I have friends everywhere, and if you try something…" He chuckled darkly. "I'll see it—intervene before it can play out. And you'll get fucked. You'll only fuck yourself."

"Noted," I said, my gaze not leaving his.

"You're on the fast track to getting your button because I need more like you—honest, loyal. The younger generation…they never worked a day in their lives." I think he referred to CJ. "You work hard—for the things you've gained, for respect. Even if I recently handed you a loot and a half, you didn't ask for it. You didn't come up in here with your hand out." He was shouting his rant.

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me. Just continue doing the right thing. You treat me well, and I'll treat you better," he told me. "Expect a call from me soon."

"All right," I said.


	90. Chapter 90

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety**

My mind was filled to the max when I left, but I had no time for that.

I kept looking over my shoulder, keeping an eye on everything and everyone, taking the long way home. My immediate concern was for Bella, but she was still blowing up my phone, texting me.

Nothing was wrong with her. She was fine.

She was worried about me, and that had me wondering, too—wondering why she'd be concerned for me.

All of her calls got to be annoying, though. They got me heated, yet my anger was misplaced.

I was wary because…maybe my godfather's trust in me was no secret.

Those who'd know I'd have his back might be coming for me, too.

Now, I had to worry about the fucks who tried to take him out—CJ and whoever helped him.

Especially since I dissed CJ this morning; I never showed up at the cleaners. I went to his pop's spot instead, and CJ obviously knows his advances weren't successful.

Unless Colleoni faked it all somehow—his death—but that didn't make sense. As his son, CJ would have been with his father, his family. The hit on Colleoni was being kept a secret for a reason.

I had no idea. It was still early in the day. I'm sure by nightfall most will know, those who were in on it will clear out—leave town—or they'd try again.

One thing was for sure . . . there'd be a war within the Colleoni family . . . between those loyal to CJ and then those standing behind the old man.

I didn't know who was my friend, or who was an enemy at this point.

Maybe I could call Riley. Maybe he wouldn't be so cryptic, or maybe I should grab Bella and head back to the Colleoni compound.

If I couldn't get Bella and myself out of the 'hood, that'd be the safest place to go.

Again, I had no idea—didn't know what to do, but I had my heat, and I kept my eyes on every-fucking-thing as I walked back to my crib.

When I arrived at the avenue, I saw lights with no sirens, multiple official vehicles, mad agents milling about.

Afraid I might get pinched—since I didn't know who they were looking for, couldn't see what they were doing—I ducked into a large apartment building, only to take off out the back door. I went down the alley, climbed a fence, and then I ran through people's backyards.

I had no idea what was going down, but I had to keep moving.

Nevertheless, when it was all said and done, I'd gone two blocks out of the way just to back track and stay unseen—trying to get back home.

Before I got there, I walked down Jasper's driveway, peeking around the garage.

There were no government cars on our block, but a crowd had formed on the avenue—on the curb.

I ducked into the back again, entering my house through my basement door, noticing how quiet it was as I ran upstairs.

"Come on, Edward!"

I heard Bella cry, and as I turned the corner, I saw her clutching her cell phone.

"Bella—" I was out of breath.

She ran for me and jumped into my arms. "Thank God—oh my God!" She pulled my face down to pepper it with kisses.

"I'm home…I'm good." I blew out a breath.

"What's going on?"

My brows rose, and I was about to ask her the same thing, but something else came to mind. "Go pack a bag—"

"What?" Her face fell.

I groaned, pausing for a second.

"What's going on?" she shouted at the same time there was a knock.

I pushed Bella into the hall. "Stay here." Grasping my heat from my waist, I walked to the door. Then I peeked to see it was Jasper. "Yo…" I opened the door just enough so he could sneak in, and then I closed it—locked it after him.

"Dude!" He looked like he was in shock.

"Thank God you're okay!" Bella hugged Jasper tight.

I looked out the window, and our block was still clear.

"What the fuck is goin' on?" Jasper asked me.

I shrugged with a slight shake to my head. "You were just at Sal's—wait, where's Alice?"

He pushed his hair back. "She's at my place—Colleoni told me not to let her out the house. She can't even come here, so what's going on? No one's tellin' me shit!"

"Relax," I told my high-strung friend. "I—I don't know." Heaving a sigh, I sat on the couch.


	91. Chapter 91

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-One**

It wasn't like there was some massive shootout, nor was there war on the streets. But official vehicles flooded our part of Eighteenth Avenue.

The F.B.I. has no idea who I am, so I essentially had nothing to worry about.

I did, however, worry because you never fucking know.

"You were just at Sal's," I repeated myself, staring at Jasper. "Did they search or…?"

"No. Why would they…? Ruffalo's still there." He lit a cigarette.

"Alice—" Bella whined.

Jasper waved a hand. "She's fine."

Bella stomped her foot. "If you don't care about her…Jazz." She shook her head, having a seat.

Jasper seemed amused by her outburst. "I do care…She's fine. I stopped home before running here." He turned to me. "All I saw were agents storming the cleaners—that's it." He shrugged, taking off his apron. "Nosy fuckers flooded the streets, and I was able to get lost in the crowd—get here, and I…honestly didn't see much."

"Okay…" I nodded, taking another look out the window, and I was able to see the lights being reflected off the houses on our block.

When I turned, I saw Alice running up my stoop, and then she was banging on the door.

Bella jumped, Jasper stared at me, and I just opened the door—ushering Alice inside.

"What the fuck?" Jasper shouted, lunging at her to grasp her arm. "What part of stay in the house didn't you fuckin' get?"

"Stop!" Bella got between them and in her brother's face, and then I went for Bella—pulling her away from them. I'd never known my best friend to have such a temper before recent times. But if he took a swing at Alice or something—hit Bella by mistake—no, fuck that. I'd break his nose again…and other parts before he had the chance to do either.

"Everyone have a seat!" I snapped.

Bella complied, plopping back onto the couch while Jasper and Alice had some stare-off. Then Alice recovered to push Jazz away. "Don't fuckin' touch me like that! Asshole!" She stomped on his foot. "Who the fuck do you think you are?!"

He winced and turned back to her.

"Hey!" I hollered, making them both disband.

Alice calmed down, looking to the three of us and then to her phone. "Rose was at the nail salon—she saw Ceej and everybody getting arrested. I-I can't get ahold of my dad." She held her forehead. "My mom…" She started to cry while Jasper and I didn't say a word.

Bella fussed over her friend, drying her tears with her thumbs. "Maybe your dad's busy, or—" She looked to me.

I shrugged.

"What if they went to my house, too?" Alice sobbed. "My father—and they need bail money, and my mom's not answering either." She placed her phone to her ear. "Oh…" I guess no one was answering. "I should call Riley or Uncle Mike. They weren't there—"

Jasper stole her phone away. "Just relax…okay? You need to calm down."

Alice let out a wail and collapsed into his arms.

"You're father's fine," I said, taking Bella's hand, so she'd sit next to me. "Your father's home or he was home. I bet he's at F.B.I. Headquarters—"

"Dude, those weren't Feds," Jasper whispered. "They were wearing fuckin' DEA jackets."

"What?" Alice sniffled. "What's that mean?"

"Drug Enforcement Administration." Bella supplied, which made me grin at her. "That's—that's serious." Her face paled. "For, I mean—"

"You don't know what you're talking about," Alice told her.

I put my hand up, wanting my girl to finish. "Keep talking." I kissed her cheek. Not only did I want to know what Bella knew, but I wanted her voice to be heard.

"For the DEA to get involved…I'm pretty sure it's hardcore, like a lot of drugs? For it to be passed over the NYPD…for the Feds to turn it over to them? They must have evidence—like a whole operation, lots of surveillance." She widened her arms, eyes on the floor. "And the cops…they're paid to stay out of the neighborhood. The Feds only sniff around for a handout, too." Her gaze flashed to mine.

"DEA don't fuck around." I kissed her neck. "They gotta training facility at Quantico, too. The Feds, the DEA, the Marines…it's all sectored together. There's more spots, but yeah. DEA ain't a joke. It's a lot of training."

Jasper snorted. "Was that something you looked into?"

I shook my head. "Fuck all that."

"This is all bullshit!" Alice shouted. "My brother's not a drug dealer."

"Of course not," Bella agreed with her. "It's probably a misunderstanding." She turned to me. "Are we okay?"

I rubbed her back, making soothing circles. "We're fine."

**Thank you for reading.**


	92. Chapter 92

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Two**

With no news being good news, I wasn't truly worried about a thing. Alice was still beside herself, trying to get in touch with members of her family, and I wondered why they'd blatantly ignore her.

Rose called Bella, and I was surprised to hear that Emmett wasn't hauled away with the rest of them. She told Bella that CJ, Marcus, Caius, and a few others were arrested—those who were meeting for the sit-down CJ had planned for today.

I have nothing to do with any dealing of drugs, but I was supposed to be there—Riley, too.

He had an excuse, but my absence . . .

I didn't have to worry about heat coming down on me from the Feds or the DEA. Even if I was just there, convening with them, they have no evidence against me.

However, what if whoever-the-fuck thinks I'm a rat…because I conveniently wasn't there? Because I knew not to be there?

Firmly, I believe Colleoni set up his own son.

A lot can be said about that.

I mean, it'd actually be more honorable—on Colleoni's part—to clip CJ, rather than turning him in.

Or, maybe, it was going to happen and Colleoni caught wind of it; he let the chips fall where they were supposed to again?

Bella never made lasagna for dinner.

I had Jazz run down to get us a pizza pie.

_Yeah, we're all sick of pizza and shit, but we had to eat._

Curious as to what was going down now, I urged Jasper to go, and he did. It only took him fifteen minutes, and he was able to get the scoop from Ruffalo.

While we've yet to learn the charges, they confiscated a lot of shit—Irina, the chick who actually runs the dry cleaners, was arrested, too.

And, by now, the avenue was quiet.

After dinner, Jasper and I had a few beers, and we turned on the six o'clock news.

CJ's one stupid motherfucker, or maybe he just thought no one could ever touch him.

The news broadcaster talked about a cocaine bust in Bensonhurst while agents also found bricks of heroin hidden in the walls.

None of it sounded like what was spoken about in front of me—at Breaking Dawn with that pimp dude.

The news made it sound like CJ and Caius had been running this major operation for a long time.

Maybe Joey, the pimp, was just a new supplier CJ looked to take on?

Either way, I knew the shit with that cat was a setup.

Somewhere at sometime, someone fucked up, and like Colleoni said—it's like dominoes.

Everything toppled over—one after another—and CJ trying to take out his father was just his way of covering his own ass.

But…Colleoni had to know about the bust today.

I bet he's got someone in his pocket.

_And he let it happen._

He didn't warn his son.

Regardless, even if none of this affected me directly, I still wondered what it'd mean to me.

It was about eight at night when Riley stopped by. Alice, who'd slowly calmed down, threw herself into his arms. Riley caught her, was quick to soothe her, but Jasper was pissed.

"Hey…" I tried my best to break up the Alice/Riley powwow.

Alice dried her eyes, looking at me from over her shoulder, but she was fast to bury her head into Riley's chest again.

"Shhhh." He kissed her hair. "Go sit with Bella." Riley nudged her, and Alice went willingly.

Jasper clapped. "Guess everything's cool here?" He went to walk around Riley.

"Yo…where you going?" I asked, keeping my tone low.

He smirked behind me. "Alice got her man now—"

"Whoa!" Riley widened his arms.

"Jasper!" Alice shouted for him.

I grabbed his arm before he could descend the stairs. "Colleoni gave you a job to do. One job, one simple task—look out for Alice."

Jasper squared his jaw, looking up and down the block. "She fights me at every turn, but homeboy shows up and it's all good? What the fuck is that?"

"Yo, dude…" Riley stepped beside me, talking to Jazz. "Ali's like my baby sister—"

"Baby sister that you used to fuck—oh, but you're a nice guy. You drove her to the abortion clinic!" Jasper shouted.

"Fuck!" I jumped to hold Riley back. "Relax."

Riley pushed and pushed, trying to get at Jasper. "You're outta line! You need to mind your own fuckin' business—"

"Let him go, Ed!" Jasper widened his arms.

"Enough!" I shouted, pushing Riley back into my crib. "Be easy…please," I asked him.

Riley groaned, but he did go inside, and I whipped around to Jazz. "Was that necessary?"

He stared down to the sidewalk with his hands on his hips. "Riley's a piece of shit, and Alice looks at him like he's—"

"Jasper!" Alice cried, running down the stairs. "Don't leave."

He pulled his hand out of her grasp. "Back off."

"No!" she yelled, grabbing for him, clawing at him while she cried, and Jasper got angrier and angrier.

I hopped from my stoop to pull her away before he lost his temper. "Let him go," I said. "Don't do this." I hugged Alice close, trying to get her to calm down.

Honestly, I had no idea what was up with Jasper. He didn't say much else before he started to walk back home. I had no idea if his words for Riley stemmed from jealousy, nor did I know if he even loved Alice.

Colleoni asked him to keep her safe, and if he didn't…?

"Give him a minute." I let go of Alice. "He'll be back. He's not stupid."

She cried into her palms. "I do everything—everything to make him love me."

"C'mere." Riley called her over to envelop her in a hug. "Of course he loves you." He winked at me from over her head. "He's just jealous. Fuck, I'd be, too." He shook his head. "Look, just relax, okay?" He leaned back to look at her. "Give him a chance to calm down…I'll go talk to him."

"No," I said, locking eyes with him. "Maybe he talked some shit…" I chuckled, and I didn't say what I wanted to—that if he hurt Jasper, he'd have problems with me; meanwhile, I'm nobody.

Riley showed me his palms. "I truly meant talk—speak to him. He can't be puttin' my business out there like that."

"No," Alice whispered. "I need him—"

Her crazy, small ass started running down the block.

Riley was about to chase her, but I held him back—stepping into the street to watch her knock on Jazz's door.

He answered and let her inside . . . like I knew he would.

Huffing a breath, I faced Riley. "What the fuck?" At this point, I didn't know what else to say, and I wasn't talking about Jasper.

Riley turned to enter my house again. "Bella, youse got any more beer?" he asked her.

I stomped up the few stairs, slamming the door after myself. "I got it." I stopped Bella from standing, going into the fridge.

"There's somewhere we can talk?" Riley asked.

I handed him a beer. "Basement, upstairs…" Basically, we could speak wherever Bella wasn't. "Basement." I jerked my head since I didn't want to inconvenience my lady.


	93. Chapter 93

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Three**

Thankfully, Riley was quick to get down to business—break shit down for me.

The DEA had been onto CJ for months. It was like the news said; CJ had been running coke in and out of the dry cleaners and his nightclub for a while. That's how Colleoni caught wind of it.

A few agents approached him, showed him evidence, and they tried to get Colleoni to flip—go against his son—they were trying to be his friend.

Colleoni told them to arrest him or let him go, and he was released—didn't help them in any way, and all of that happened without fanfare.

Since federal agents can be bought, both Colleoni and CJ had this one or that in their pocket. CJ's informant told him about his father being questioned—approached with evidence—and then CJ put a plan in motion to move against his father.

Riley was to go along with it, too, and when Riley went to Colleoni to warn him, my godfather had other news for him.

Colleoni's inside connection told him there would be a huge bust today.

In short, instead of killing his son, all Colleoni had to do was survive any hits and make it to today—when CJ would get arrested.

With as much product as he had…CJ's looking at about twenty-five to life behind bars.

Colleoni wiped his hands clean.

That's CJ's problem.

And if CJ decides to talk—if anyone pinched today starts singing, they'll be iced before they can testify.

"Are you in or are you out?" Riley asked. "This family's about to get a lot smaller."

"In." I nodded. "I've said it before."

He grinned. "It's gonna be me and you, baby." Riley kissed my cheek, which made me laugh as I pushed him away. "We get Cigno on board…" He made a farting noise with his mouth. "Colleoni…thinks he has potential. What do I know?"

I didn't say anything because I couldn't speak for Jasper.

"Shit is obviously hot right now, but you'll get your button soon enough. You'll roll wit' me, on my crew, basically like we been doin'. All right?"

I slapped my hand to his. "Sounds good."

"Remember what I said? Colleoni wants you to have Caius's side of the avenue—mad paper there." He shook his head. "Soon, you'll know where to collect…you give me a taste—my tribute—and you'll be livin' large, son." He chuckled. "But with getting a bump, you also get more responsibilities. Understand?"

"Yes," I said.

"You're not no small-time low-man…Once you get that button, become a member, that's when your fees are due. You pay me, and then I pay the man upstairs, and that's how it goes. Get it?"

"I do...I know about kicking up. Tribute." I nodded.

"I have high hopes for you, just like your godfather…Maybe one day you'll be a capo like me?" He plucked his shirt. "Well, he hasn't announced it just yet, but yeah. It's coming—my bump."

I rolled my eyes, smiling. "Right…Congratulations."

He placed his hand on my shoulder. "If you do the_ right_ thing…continue to be loyal, _good things_ happen."

I just continued to smile.

**Thanks again for reading! **


	94. Chapter 94

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

****NOTE****

**Time has moved forward between CH93 and CH94, there's a time gap. The story will start picking up the pace a bit. I hope you all enjoy! Thanks so much for being patient. Thanks, most of all, for continuing to read, follow Tribute! Mwah!**

**XOXOX**

**—SLC**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Four**

**F**our days after that talk with Riley, I became a made member of the Colleoni family. It was a small ceremony—very small—in my godfather's basement. Afterward, we had a few drinks, and Bella knew because I'd told her. She made me a cake and we had our own little celebration.

With every stone being turned—between the arrests that were made and Colleoni sifting through his own backyard—wise guys were popping up dead everywhere in the weeks and months that followed the CJ bust.

Like my godfather instructed, I helped with spring-cleaning, but it was a family-wide thing.

Times were grim . . . very fucking depressing.

There was no such thing as going to Gazebo for a few drinks anymore.

No such thing as chillin' on the corner and bullshitting anymore either.

Everyone was playing it safe, practically living in fear—God forbid the authorities caught wind of something, or you didsomething suspicious that might get you clipped.

And I filled my new role…

Those people who used to pay Caius—protection money—had no problems paying me. That all worked out fine, but like Riley once said, I wasn't that comfortable taking from the people in the neighborhood. He does it now because he has to, but it's not something I like to do.

Either way, I was Riley's top earner—the highest in rank under him within the crew—because half of the avenue was mine. I was getting paid, but I also had to kick up every week, so I relied on that protection money.

Every Monday—hook or crook—I had to give Riley five grand.

The first month…it was easy.

Then…this one or that one wouldn't have my money.

And even if I showed a firm hand, I couldn't magically make dollars appear where there weren't any.

_Yeah, my forced hand has grazed a few cash registers, only to find them empty._

Maybe the shit I was doing wasn't ethical, but with playing it safe—trying to be so careful—I didn't have enough going yet, enough of my own jobs.

Riley would send me to do this or that along with other members of our crew.

But he'd get the biggest taste as our captain, and I still had to pay him every fucking week.

When I had to start dipping into my own funds—taking quite a few hundred out of my own bank account—I had to sit and think up some shit.

Riley wasn't being hard on me. He didn't make me pay more than anyone else on his crew. Actually, I pay less because whenever Colleoni needs muscle, I'm there—I'm his driver.

Otherwise, Colleoni doesn't even leave the 'hood anymore. It's a privilege, driving for him, but if he calls, I have to drop everything and rush to his crib.

Colleoni also doesn't give a fuck about my money troubles, which are no doubt small potatoes to him. He's got a whole organization to run, and . . .

I knew I wasn't the only dude with a problem.

_This recession, this depression is bullshit._

"What's wrong?" Bella sat next to me on the bed to rub my back.

I slowly turned to her, my eyes landing on her stomach—her bump. She's five months along now, and she's been showing for the past six weeks. It seems like she's getting bigger at every turn.

In a few days, we find out if it's a boy or a girl.

"Nothing," I answered.

She frowned but the tears stayed at bay. "Edward…please, talk to me."

I sighed, pushing her hair away from her neck. "It's nothing—no big deal."

Bella furrowed her brow, staring at the carpet. "Dinner's almost ready."

I clamped my eyes closed.

"You're busy?" She huffed, leaving the bed.

"I—"

"Just forget it." She left the bedroom, but then she came back. "Maybe later—tonight—we can—" Bella just stared at me, rubbing her stomach. "Do-do you think, um, I'm gross now?"

My eyes widened, and I ran to her, getting on my knees. "That's not it at all. You're beautiful." I kissed her hand, her belly-bump, and then her lips. "Baby…" I didn't know what to say.

Things had changed so drastically over the past few months.

Bella and I started out having fun, making love every day, and now…Fuck, I'm out so much. Between doing this and doing that, I've been getting lazy with the things_ I can _while trying to stay on top of my game business-wise.

And I haven't been the best boyfriend…

_Yes, I'm still just her boyfriend._

Bella has matured. She even has a thicker skin, but that wasn't something I made happen.

Time happened…I guess.

All the things I wanted for Bella, all the things I swore I'd do—including just being around for her—weren't happening.

But time was…it was passing us by.

I scoffed at nothing, wanting to bash my head into the wall.

"Edward, please…" Now she was crying. "Just tell me—talk to me."

Clearing my throat, I turned back around. "I just have a lot on my mind. Tomorrow night, we'll have dinner together. We'll watch a movie." I nipped her lips, hugging her tight.

"That's not—" Her shoulders dropped within our embrace. "I know something's wrong," she whispered.

"Bella—"

"Just talk to me!" she shouted. "Tell me what's going on! You've been like this for weeks." She gestured, a grimace in place. "You hafta talk to me." Her pleas were getting on my nerves, sounding more like whines. "Edward—"

"Just let it go," I whispered.

"No!" She raised her voice again. "You have to—"

Aggravated, I stiffened in place. "Bella—"

"You always have to know what's wrong with me. Or, you used to care!" She stomped her foot. "You don't talk to me. You don't touch me! You don't do anything—"

Seeing red, her nagging making my stomach ache and my muscles tighten, I turned to punch the wall. "Enough!"

Bella hopped back and almost lost her footing, her lip quivering.

I jumped to catch her before she fell, and she was okay, but she pushed her way out of my arms.

Bella stormed into the bathroom—her safe haven—to lock the door.

Feeling my eyes prick with tears, my steps were slow as I approached to knock. "Baby…I'm sorry."

She didn't answer me, and then my cell started ringing.

It was Aldo. "Yeah?"

_"We doin' this or what?"_ he asked.

I nodded, wanting to say no. "I'll be right there."

As I ended the call, my free hand ghosted along the door. "Bella…I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I scared you."

She had no reply, but I heard her sobbing.

"Baby, please…I can't leave unless—"

"Just go!" she shouted, her voice shaky.

"I'll—I'll be back early." I honestly didn't know if I would, hating myself even more. "I love you…I love you so much, and things'll get better. I promise. I swear to Christ, Bella. I love you, and I want you all the time—_all _the time." I cleared my throat.

"I love you, too," she whispered.

I cracked a grin. "Good…Thank you."

Honestly, even with her forgiveness and her telling me she loved me . . .

I didn't feel any better.


	95. Chapter 95

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Five**

**_I_** took off on foot and met Jasper at the corner.

He actually dug Colleoni's offer months back. Jasper's below me, and he's a low-man now—associated with Riley's crew but not yet a member. He's still with Alice, and that's all I really know. Even before he got involved with the thing, he never spoke about her that often.

Bella…I'm sure _she'd_ know_ if_ I asked, but…I honestly didn't give a fuck what was up with Jasper and Alice.

I knew they were happy, and I was happy for them, while my own relationship was crumbling to the-_motherfucking_-ground.

"I don't like this," Jasper whispered, pulling on a cigarette.

I chuckled. "It's no big thing. You're just gonna drive the car. Aldo and I'll do the foot work."

"Right." He tossed his smoke into the street, and then hopped into his Honda.

We picked up Aldo from his crib before getting onto the highway. Silence filled the cab as we entered Manhattan. Since the days are getting shorter with the cold weather, it was dark by the time we left the Lincoln Tunnel.

Finding a parking spot was a bitch, but then we walked three blocks away where Aldo broke into a beat-up Chevy. We needed a whip that wouldn't have an alarm and one we could hot-wire with ease.

Jasper drove . . .

And when we were closer to Midtown, we donned ski masks, all of us already wearing gloves.

This guy Aldo knew was into a bookie—Justin, who also happens to be on Riley's crew—for ten large, and he was willing to make restitution by any means necessary.

Even if it meant we'd rob his father's shop while he let us get away with it.

It was before closing time, so there were no alarms once again, and we blasted through there without a fuss.

We racked up cash from the safe, gold, fucking diamonds.

We made sure the kid coughed up the surveillance tapes, and all he did was watch while having no idea what I looked like.

No one got hurt.

Well, Keith—that kid—asked us to lay a shiner on him so it looked like he put up a fight.

I didn't mind.

We were in and out within ten minutes, and I had no idea how much we'd walked away with. Judging by the sacks we had, I'd say it was over fifty grand—more than we were supposed to take—and there might be a nice-sized engagement ring in there for Bella, too.

We just took whatever we could get our hands on.

Jasper made sure not to speed on our way back to his car.

It was smooth sailing, and I wore the biggest smile.

"Woot!" Aldo hooted and hollered, banging on the dashboard.

I cackled in the back seat. "How much you think?"

"Fuck, man…I don't know. The cash alone—all those stacks and then once we unload the jewelry!" He winced, laughing his ass off.

Jasper shifted in his seat. "No one's following—"

"Relax." I clamped my hand down on his shoulder. "Just keep driving." No one was the wiser, and that kid was going to give us a head start.

"After we pay Justin…give Riley his share…We're probably looking at like fifteen grand a piece, but then Colleoni'll get a taste, too. Ha! I can't wait to tell him. Might earn me some points." Aldo was happy about that, but I wasn't—not when he broke it down like that, airing our business, divvying it up all those ways . . .

_What's that saying? Too many hands in the pot spoils the gravy?_

"Yeah…" I nodded. "It'll def. earn you points."

While he talked Jasper's ear off, I quietly attached the silencer to the nine I had.

We were quick to find another parking spot on the same block.

But I had to move fast.

Before Jasper even left the car, I placed my heat to Aldo's head and pulled the fucking trigger.


	96. Chapter 96

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Six**

With the music going and the street noise, it actually took Jasper a second to realize what'd happened.

His head whipped between the blood on the windshield and back to me.

"Grab all that shit and move!" I nearly shouted, wiping any possible prints from the gun before tossing it under the front seat. I was wearing gloves, but you can never be _too_ careful.

Jasper scrambled to get the bags of loot Aldo had by his feet, but he was squeamish about the blood—his dead body.

"Come on!" I gritted my teeth, pulling him and the bags out of the car.

"Why'd you do that?" He was upset, actually jumped in front of me while we crossed the street.

I slung one of the duffle bags over my shoulder. "Keep your fucking head down and act casual."

Jasper gulped, tightening his hold on the bookbag he rocked and the other suitcase.

From there, we managed to make it back to his Honda unseen.

But once inside . . .

I thought Jasper was seconds away from having a panic attack.

"You need to chill the fuck out!" I shook him. "Get out. I'm driving."

We switched seats, and Jasper's hands were shaking as he lit a cigarette.

"What the fuck were you thinking when you said yes to Colleoni?" I asked, pulling away from the curb.

He blew his smoke out the window.

"It's part of the game." I shrugged. "Aldo wasn't a made guy—not yet. I outranked him."

"That makes it okay?" Jasper chuckled without humor.

"He was talking too much," I said, turning to smile at my friend.

"Colleoni—"

"Isn't going to do shit!" I finished for him. "Let _me_ do all the talking…if there _is_ talk. You don't even let anybody know you were with me. Understand? We count this shit out…we round to the _lesser_ number, we split the spoils and do the right thing, and then we pocket the rest."

"You popped Aldo for what? An extra twenty grand?" he asked, sounding too sassy for a fuckin' dude.

When he said it like that, it had me feeling a certain way and shit.

"No…he talked too much." I nodded, turning the radio on. "And if you're ready to piss your pants because of some shit like that…? Jasper, fuckin' walk away now before you gotta make your bones or some shit."

"If I had a valid reason—"

"People get clipped for less! Look around you!" I shook my head, laughing. "You don't gotta worry about making tribute yet—"

"You act like you're starving. What? Being a big-shot wiseguy isn't working out for you either?" He had an attitude...again.

"Keep actin' like a bitch, and I'll slap you like one." I chuckled, reaching out to grasp his bicep. "Watch your _fuckin' tone_with me."

Jasper got all quiet and stared out the window, like his sister does.

"Don't make me have to worry about you," I said. "I'd hate…_fucking hate_—" I hit the steering wheel "—for _us_ to have problems." My heart broke once again while I also felt numb in the moment.

"If you think I'd rat you out, you got _more_ problems…" He grumbled. "Ed, don't get greedy, man. You see what happens when guys do."

"Smile!" I tried to lighten the mood. "We just made out like bandits."

Jasper nodded, but he didn't even crack a grin.

The next day, we did the right thing.

We counted shit out in my basement, and we were able to walk away with thirty-five grand a piece after giving Riley and Colleoni a taste—including the jewelry. Well, the gold and diamonds—the rings, chains, and everything—we just laid it all out. Jasper and I took what we wanted, and whatever was left over, we let Colleoni and Riley pick from it.

I had a two and a half carat ring for Bella.

It was white gold, and fucking beautiful, and now all I needed to do was wait for the right time.

The rest, the shit no one wanted, I sent Jasper out to New Jersey where he hit up four pawnshops.

We had another fifteen grand to split.

And Colleoni—the businessman that he is—didn't give me any shit for icing Aldo.

After I explained about how Aldo was boasting about the heist, and made up some more bullshit…

I got props for thinking on my feet and covering my ass.

And that wouldn't be the first job Jasper and I would pull together.

Later that week . . .

Just when things were looking up, I _fucked up_ and missed Bella's appointment. She refused to talk to me for two days straight, and then she left me a note by my coffee mug before she left. I didn't even know where she'd gone to, but the Post-it . . .

We were having a boy.

I'd inquired about it many times, all while begging Bella to speak to me, but she'd ignore me.

She finally put me out of my misery when I went for the coffee pot two days later . . .

A boy.

I tore up the streets looking for her since she wasn't answering my calls.

I'd overreacted since she'd only gone to the supermarket, and I didn't care if she hated me.

I kissed her deep, and I cried, and I begged her for forgiveness once again.

But that wouldn't be the last time I'd fuck up.

Nor would it be the last time I'd beg for forgiveness.

Nevertheless, by the time Christmas rolled around, Jasper was my partner in crime. We'd collect together, shake people down. We'd get tips regarding Mack trucks with really good loads—hijack those. We'd pull all different kinds of jobs together, but Jasper couldn't embrace certain aspects of his new role.

It didn't matter.

He had a knack for other things, like picking locks and breaking into safes.

I helped him out and he helped me, and I never felt bad about any of that shit.

_It was all insured._

And we were good at what we did.

Since I no longer worried about kicking up every week—since I was ahead of the game—I hoped things would start looking better at home, too.

I still loved Bella with all my heart.

I was excited _beyond reason_ for the birth of our baby, but most nights . . .

The nights I _was_ home . . .

It almost felt as though I slept next to a stranger, or maybe _I_ was the stranger, since I didn't recognize myself…what I was becoming.

The one thing I knew for sure . . .

Bella and I.

Me and Bella…

_We _needed to get back to who we were.

**Thank you for reading.**

**Please leave me your thoughts.**

****Please have faith. Youse know I didn't drag out getting them together just to break them up.**


	97. Chapter 97

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Seven**

On Christmas Eve, I planned to propose, and I hoped Bella would say yes.

She's been okay.

We're existing…just like we've been for the past couple of months.

We even had sex like two weeks ago, but I knew her heart was breaking as much as mine was.

Bella was quiet. We'd exchange pleasantries. I'd try to be home for dinner—because she cooks _every_ night—but even so.

It felt as though we were both at some standstill.

And I hated it.

Oh, and she thinks I'm sleeping around.

Bella told Alice who told Jasper . . . who gave me a black eye.

Jazz just sucker-punched me, and I was quick to lay some logic down on his ass.

Jasper and I are always together.

It'd be more believable if Bella thought I was fuckin' her brother . . . not some other, random broad.

Jasper apologized.

Bella cried because he'd punched me in the face, and yet…she didn't believe me.

Although she was sorry I got hurt.

To top it all off, Bella approached me later that night—she said she understood, that she's gained weight, looks different now, so it's okay?

Yo, I was so pissed, I wanted to smack some sense into Bella myself.

Just for that stupid fucking remark . . .

We got past it.

I didn't tell her what I'd been doing, but I begged and pleaded, and I even told her to go talk to her brother.

Logically, Jasper had reevaluated his thought process, and he knew it wasn't possible.

Bella believed me…or just said she did, and we made love, which was interesting with her baby-bump.

At nearly seven months, it was hard to get around it, but Bella's hella cute—adorable and still fucking sexy.

That was two weeks ago, and then we went back to normal.

I've slowed down this week. I've been home more often, but Bella still…does what she does and acts like I'm not here. She cleans the house from top to bottom every single day. She does whatever laundry we have. She cooks, making these kick-ass meals from scratch. Bella keeps busy, too.

I've been trying really hard—showing her all kinds of love and affection, and I thought I was getting somewhere until last night.

Until she asked me if I broke up with my other girlfriend . . . because I'm home more often?

I thought I was going insane, crazy that…she still didn't believe me.

Crazier than that…Bella just accepts it?

Like, if I was, it'd be cool? She'd look the other way?

_My father taught me that when you turn the other cheek, you get slapped in it._

A part of me wondered why I wasn't worth fighting for, why Bella wasn't trying. Or, at the very least, meeting me halfway. For the most part, she's go with the flow. But it'd be nice to know if she enjoyed my company, wanted me around…

There is no fight…none at all.

I couldn't wrap my head around that. Bella doesn't need to ask for my attention. I know I've fucked up, neglected her and shit. As of recent, I've tried by best, pulling out all the stops, going the whole nine trying to romance her.

And . . . I remembered those days when Bella used to cry all the time.

Believe it or not, I'd take all the tears instead of her indifference—instead of her shutting down, being way too quiet, and succumbing to whatever our life is now.

Bella _doesn't_ fight with me.

She _accepts_ this: our life, my behavior, my absence.

"Jasper and Alice should be here in ten minutes." Bella tried to bend low, grab the turkey from the oven.

"I got it," I said, reaching for the oven mitts.

She let me have them, leaning back on the counter to huff.

"Are you okay?" Turkey forgotten, I turned my whole body to face her.

"Just tired," she whispered, staring to the floor. "My back's been hurting, and it's hard to sleep."

"You can wake me up," I whispered. "I'll give you a massage or—" I just stopped talking because her eyes were empty—frighteningly so.

I placed my hand on her cheek, making her look to me. "I love you…I love you, Bella." Thinking about last night, I was flooded with many emotions—fucking sadness flaring up inside of me. "I'm sorry things didn't work out…like I promised?"

She gulped, reaching to thumb the tears away from my eyes—hers were dry.

"I'm sorry." My voice broke, and I got down to my knees to hug her. "I love you…I love you more than anything. I still think you're the most beautiful, the sexiest…Bella, you're the woman of my dreams_—my fucking wettest dreams—_and I know things have been shitty. I haven't been home, and I should have told you all that was going on. I'm not cheating. I'm not sleeping with anyone—" I jerked back a few inches.

Amidst my tears and my rant, my gaze whipped to hers, since I felt something hit my cheek. "Did my son just kick me in the face?"

Bella giggled through her tears as she nodded.

"Baby…my Bella-Boo." Emotional, more so than I've ever been in my life, feeling more than ever before, my lips lingered on her stomach. "I'll be better." I looked to Bella. "We'll be better…just…believe me. Believe me! You hafta believe me!" I palmed her ass, hugging her tightly.

"Easy." She winced.

"I'm sorry." I broke down, crying my eyes out, and slumping lower to the floor. I can't even hold her right anymore. "I'm sorry."

"Edward…" she whimpered, swallowing her cry. "Get up." Her face crumpled, and she refused to look at me. "I can't—" Bella gripped the counter, bending to get to me, but I hopped to stop her.

Still on my knees, I backed away to dig the ring out of my pocket. "Bella…" I held it up to her, and her eyes widened. "You have no reason to accept…but marry me. Gimme another shot, the chance to prove myself…if you still love me. Please." Sniffling, I grabbed her hand to place it on her finger, desperate and begging. "Please…marry me."

'Cause I knew, if she left me now . . .

I'd never be whole without her.

"I got lazy…I was working, but that's not important—"

"Yes." She rasped. "I'll—I'll marry you. I still love you, Edward," Bella cried. "A little bit of you…it's better than none at all."

"Don't say that…You have me, all of me. Baby, I'm yours, and I need you to be mine." I let out a breath, feeling as though I could breathe again, and I hugged her legs. "Thank you . . . Thank you."

Her fingers wove into my hair. "You never talk to me." She took a deep breath. "Edward, you've helped me through some bad times. And I see you…having bad times. It's a horrible feeling, watching someone you love—the person you love the most—struggle, and you wanna help but you can't. 'Cause you don't open up. As soon as we got close, you shut me out."

"I'll open up," I promised. "I'll be more upfront, but…there's things you _don't_ wanna know, and there's too much I_ can't_tell you."

"Just…" Bella looked away from me. "That's not really what I'm talking about." She was cold again. "Your work is your work—"

"I fucked it all to hell…" I turned her chin, needing to see those eyes. "Lemme fix it."

"I don't know, but _I_ hurt." She barely got the words out as she held her chest. "You're never here, and then when you're home…Edward, you're still _not here_, and you yell because you get-you get frustrated," she sobbed. "And I hate that I make you mad, and…I don't know what to think. I try…I try so hard to make you happy—"

"You do." I sucked in a shaky breath. "Every day…you surprise me with your strength, Bella. You put up with me…I know_ what_ I've been doing wrong. I had some stressful times…It was a long adjustment." I massaged her hand, stuck for words.

While I knew I'd gone _back _on my words, all my promises, and I knew what I'd done wrong . . . I couldn't accurately tell her why.

When things get to be too much, you slack off _where_ you can . . . The alternative is a bullet between the eyes, but I couldn't tell her that.

"I took you for granted," I said. "I thought there'd be more time, and now I'm losing you…" I placed her hand to my cheek, needing to feel her.

"I'm not goin' anywhere." She sniffed.

I shook my head. "No." That wasn't what I meant. "_You_, Bella…_my _Bella-Boo." I'd been given a glimpse of her. We had a few weeks of happiness before she reverted back, shut down and put up this brick wall.

And I let that happen . . . I was the one who was mixing the cement, placing the barrier between us.

"I'm here," she whispered, wiping my tears away once more. "I've_ been_ here…waiting for you." She was correct. "I love you, Edward."

I nodded, letting out a strangled cry, and then the doorbell rang.

"That's probably Alice and Jasper…" Bella's face was also soaked.

I wiped my nose with the back of my hand, standing up to lean into her. "You'll marry me? And we'll have this baby…" I palmed her stomach. "We'll be us again?"

"Yes." Her gaze met mine; I held my breath again as Bella searched my eyes. I hoped to God she saw my sincerity, my love. "A trillion times yes!" She smiled.

I crashed my lips to hers.


	98. Chapter 98

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Eight**

On Valentine's Day, I was excited to get home to Bella. Not only did I get her this amazing bracelet, but Jazz and I got our hands on this truck which was headed toward the outlet mall in Westchester.

All we did was sweet-talk the driver, too—gave him a few hundred bucks to look the other way; meanwhile, we didn't even know what was in the truck.

We'd just come back from dropping some shit off at the warehouse in Newark. Colleoni put us on to a load that was for Radio Shack the other day. I was able to boost this nice flat screen and then we had to hide the truck for a few days.

Earlier, after dropping it off to those Haitian dudes that work for Colleoni, we stopped for a cup of coffee, and we heard this driver bitching about his boss. It was dumb, but we decided . . . _fuck it._

I snagged his driver's license for his information—a tip from Jimmy Conway that goes a long way.

The trucker may not know who we are, but with his ID, we know who he is.

And where he lives.

He won't go to the cops or the Feds.

I took the truck, and Jasper followed me right back to the warehouse.

Before we got there, we ransacked it, though.

It was filled with Prada bags, shoes, and boots—ladieswear.

Since I knew Bella's sizes and her favorite color, which is blue, I took a whole lot and shoved it in my trunk.

Jasper had no idea what Alice would like, but he grabbed some shit, too.

And we made a couple of grand off that for two hours of work.

Before we made it back into Brooklyn, I pulled over on to a service road to switch my license plates.

Then I smiled during the whole home stretch.

Since Christmas, I've changed. I've softened because I now see the bigger picture. No matter what's going on work-wise, I can't bring it home. Whatever happens in the outside world has no place in my bedroom—no place between Bella and me.

Things have been better.

Bella's happier. I'm happier, and we only have less than a few weeks until our son is born.

In my spare time, I've been painting the bedroom adjacent to ours. It'll be the nursery, and I believe Alice is planning a baby shower for Bella at her parents' house this weekend. Esme is on it, too.

Marie—CJ's wife—is also involved, and I hear she's doing much better, and she's not far behind Bella in her pregnancy. I think she's having a boy, too.

I don't concern myself with CJ or what happened to him. I actually don't think about him at all. It's out of sight, out of mind, and Colleoni gets upset whenever his name is mentioned.

His trial concluded a couple of weeks ago, and he's serving twenty-five years alongside Caius and Marcus, and a few others were charged with lesser sentences.

Riley's said that as long as CJ does his bid quietly, he'll be fine at Club Fed.

If he starts talking . . . Colleoni already gave that okay.

All of which is why I don't want to know, nor do I feel badly.

I feel horrible for his wife and kids, but that actually just makes me be all the more careful.

Boosting two trucks in two days . . . it's a fluke.

We usually mix it up a bit, so highway patrol doesn't go nuts.

"I'm home!" I jumped into the house with my Hefty bag full of goods, feeling like fuckin' Santa Claus and shit.

Bella was frowning as she swept the kitchen. She looked miserable, but cute in one of my tees that's actually tight around her belly and sweats.

"Whatta ya doin'?" I dropped the bag to take the broom away from her. "You should be resting."

Bella panted and she was sweaty.

I kissed her forehead, smiling and licking my lips. "Salty."

She cracked a grin. "This place is filthy."

"What?" I looked around our immaculate home, thinking she was crazy. "Baby—"

"You bring dirt in from the backyard when you go outside to smoke, and it gets all on the tiles." She stared down, but I doubt she could even see her feet let alone the floor. "There's cobwebs and dust in the basement, and that dirt gets up here, too." Bella was serious, but I had no idea what she was talking about; our entire house is spotless.

I sighed, taking her hand. "It's Valentine's Day."

Bella whined, shaking in place. "No..."

"Yes," I laughed, wondering what's got her so grumpy. "What's up?"

She pulled on the T-shirt. "I feel gross and you're all happy, and you probably want sex…but yeah, whateva."

I chuckled. "It sounds so hot when you put it _that_ way." Kissing along her neck, I held her hips. "You're gorgeous."

"I'm not…Look." She pulled up her shirt, exposing the baby bump. It's as big as it was yesterday and the day before. "You wanna fuck this?" She poked her belly button, which was turning into an outie.

"Huh…" I bent low to lick it.

"Edward!" She pushed me.

"What?" I shouted.

Bella giggled as she stared up to me. "You know what'd be really sexy…for Valentine's Day?" She raised a brow, and I love that she's become playful.

With no drama, with being secure and shit, Bella has a side to her that's a lot of fun, adventurous, and sexy as hell.

"What?" I whispered, leaning toward those lips, the possibilities endless in my mind.

We could do it anywhere, any way she wanted—

Bella pulled away to hand me the broom. "It'd get me all wet if you mopped, too." She continued to laugh, making the bump shake.

Smiling wide, I nodded. "It would, huh?"

"Uh-huh." Bella turned for the stove. She was sautéing spinach or something.

I pulled her back into my arms. "Baby, I'll sweep, and I'll mop…but you hafta open your gifts first." I nipped those lips.

"You didn't have to—"

"I wanted to," I said, grabbing her ass.

Now that's gotten bigger, and I've been having a lot of fun with it . . . when Bella's in the mood.

She rolled her eyes. "What'd'ju steal this time?"

"Oh…" That hurt my feelings, but it wasn't that serious. "I bought this." I reached into my pocket for the bracelet.

She didn't even look at it. "Where's the box?"

I sucked my teeth, grabbing for her wrist to place it on, and then I kissed her palm. "I was in a rush. I just—"

She smiled, admiring it. "Don't lie."

I shut up about the bracelet.

Maybe I didn't pay retail for it, but_ I_ didn't specifically steal it, and I paid for it.

"It's beautiful. Thank you." She palmed my cheek, and I dove for those lips to kiss her deep.

"And there's a whole bag of Prada goodies in the living room." I wondered what I'd get for that.

"Oh." She nodded.

While showering her with gifts is nothing new, as of late, I thought she'd at least be more enthusiastic. Bella doesn't pitch a fit anymore. She just accepts them and shows her appreciation.

"Since we're being honest…" She paused.

I stepped closer to her. "What?" My stomach tied in knots. Ours has been a bumpy road. Fuck if I knew what was coming next.

Bella's face fell. "I hate to sound like a brat…asking for more. All this stuff is cool. The crib you came home with was really nice. I love it, and we needed it." She bit her lip. "You think you can get me a dishwasher? Otherwise, when the baby comes—"

I blew out a breath. "Baby, I'll get you five." I was just glad it wasn't something major.

"I saw a really nice one in Sears. It wasn't that expensive." She turned off the stove.

"Just tell me which one—make and model, whatever."

"Thank you." She lifted her chin, and that was my cue to kiss her, but she didn't let me…go for the gusto. Bella was happy, though. She hummed while she opened the oven door to turn the pork chops.

"Leave that." I reached for her hand.

"It's on broil. If I don't watch—"

"Fuck it." I shrugged, wearing a smile, getting a total kick outta the Stepford, Mob-wife of Bensonhurst routine that she's got down pat. "Let it burn, baby . . . I'll eat you for dinner." My nose nudged hers. "Lemme have you…" I trailed off, getting myself stiff with my own words.

Bella's face was red; I did good. "But, um—"

"Stop." I shut her up with my lips, pulling her into the living room, walking us backward.

Once she giggled into my mouth, I let go of her to grasp the bag and spill everything out for her.

Honestly, with all the shades of blue, the pretty handbags and shoes, I thought Bella would be happy—get all giddy and fuck me.

But her face fell a second time instead.

"What now?" I flapped that stupid Hefty bag, like a pigeon would a broken wing.

Bella rubbed her stomach, staring down. "Mr. Colleoni has never been arrested, but the F.B.I. has searched his house. Alice told me." Her gaze met mine. "It's too much. We have no receipts for anything."

Of all the things she could have focused on, Bella looked to her engagement ring...albeit adoringly while she sighed.

And she truly did impress me.

Bella constantly does.

She goes about life all la-di-_fucking_-da, in her own little world—whether she's happy, sad, or withdrawn—and then some genius shit flies out of her mouth. She's suddenly sounding like Einstein, and I'm speechless...taken by surprise, and it really shouldn't _be_ a surprise.

Bella sees everything. She grew up in the neighborhood, knows many things, but she keeps her mouth shut. I don't ask her what she knows, and she knows better than to ask me for specifics…She doesn't even ask me work-related shit unless I've brought something home. And she won't even ask _where_ the item(s) came from.

But, yeah…she knows.

Also, I knew of everything she'd said. The big stuff, I had proof of purchase fluffed from a secondhand store that Riley's boy owns. The little things? No one gives a fuck.

Plus, I'm no one in the scheme of things. I'm a soldier, like I've always been. The ones who have to watch out are those who like the glitz and glam—the capos, big-timers like Riley and Colleoni.

Nine months ago, I arrived a nobody, and if it weren't for an upheaval in things—people disappearing and getting locked up—I'd still be running with this one or that one, trying to make a little bit of money.

I bet I wouldn't have even gotten my button.

Things played out the way they did…I became a member, but people only know me around here.

Now that there's no more Gazebo, I'm not even chillin' with _known_ mafiosi.

No one knows me.

And Jasper was wrong about me being greedy.

I revel in my anonymity and I use it for its purpose—to flourish under the radar—to do what I have to do.

Before I let Bella get back to dinner, I explained it all to her, which had her feeling much better.

I felt great, too.

My conscience was eased, and Bella wasn't in the dark.

That night, I didn't go anywhere. We had dinner. I swept and mopped, and then we watched some TV. Bella fell asleep on the couch.

Sadly, she's no sack of potatoes anymore, but I managed to lift her, bringing her to bed.

Bella woke up before she hit the mattress—all startled and shit. "Edward…" She grabbed onto my shirt.

"Shhh. I'm right here." I let her go. "I'm crawling in right next to you." I kicked off my pants and then I lifted the covers to get into bed.

Bella hummed, happy, as she nestled into my arms. "I love you."

"I love you, too." I kissed her hair.


	99. Chapter 99

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter Ninety-Nine**

When Riley told me to slow down, I slowed down, although I'd thought I already did. It seemed that Jasper and I were making a name for ourselves. The Feds were looking for two white guys in their twenties who were hijacking trucks all over the tristate area.

It wasn't a main concern of theirs, nor did they have a real description of us . . .

But for a week already, Jasper and I worked at the pizzeria.

It was boring as fuck.

I even had Jazz teach me how to make a pie.

With the both of us there, I had no reason to pay the old man—I gave him a vacation, which he appreciated.

Bella would come every day, and _I'd_ make _her _lunch.

I got a kick out of that, making food for my woman and our baby.

She'd eat whatever I'd put in front of her, and I'd started getting creative, too.

One day, while Jasper was out making a delivery, I actually locked the door. Then I dragged Bella into the office. She was feeling frisky that day—had that look in her eyes, and I bent her over my desk.

_Minchia_…I found myself daydreaming about that, and then I spilled soda all over the counter. "Shit. Sorry," I told the customer, turning around to top off his Coke again. "Enjoy."

He gave a salute—because he spotted and previously commented on the ink on my arm—and turned to leave.

"This is boring," Jasper drawled.

Surprised, I gawked at him.

"I did this for years," he admitted. "Life was starting to…get fun?" Jasper laughed, jumping up onto the counter to sit.

"I'm…fine," I said, and I truly was. "Things are level…across the board." My hand waved. "I'm ahead, money's good, and the nursery is finished…me and Bella, we're finally fuckin' happy again." I smiled.

His eyes widened, shock suddenly etched in his features. "I can't believe how huge she is…And I still can't believe that…Bella Boo's…my baby sis's—" he touched his chest "—is gonna have a baby."

"We are. She's havin' my baby…" I chuckled, letting out an excited breath—all giddy and shit like a bitch at the prom.

When Jasper's phone rang, I wiped down the counter, but his call sounded official. He stood straight, didn't say much, and his face had paled. His previous jovial mood was gone as he placed his cell back into his pocket.

"You all right?"

"I hafta go…" He backed away from me. "Um, fuck." Then he whipped right back to take off his apron all nervous-like.

"What's up?" I asked.

Jasper shrugged. "Colleoni asked me to…go to his house. I have no idea. Alice has class all day today…" He pursed his lips. "I'll—I'll hit you up later." He threw me a chin jerk before dashing out the door.

Curious, but not enough to call somebody, I switched out the cash register—mixing some hot bills into the little bit of cash.

You know times are tough when people are charging a two-buck slice and a dollar soda onto their credit cards. I had a mountain of receipts, but getting the deposit ready for the bank at the end of the day is nothing new to me.

Just when I was about to call Bella, to ask if she wanted anything while I was on my way home, Riley came strolling in. He's still the same as he's always been—scheming, making money just like me, but he also holds a full-time day job. From what he's said, personal injury law doesn't sound all that fascinating. Or, maybe it's a front. Fuck if I know or care.

Riley also has a baby at home…but he's never home. It actually made me wonder how he does it, unless his wife just doesn't care. To be honest, I don't even know when the man sleeps. "How you doin'?" He went right for the coffee pot.

"Gettin' ready to close up." I yawned, leaning back against the counter. "How are you?"

He shrugged a shoulder.

We're not as close as we used to be. Now he has his status, convenes with his crew—me included—to split spoils, dole out orders, and get paid. I only see him once or twice a week, more when we're all riding together and when he needs a crew.

When I was new, I'd be introduced to everyone. It's funny how now that I do rank, I'm not high enough to converse and conduct business with certain people. Before…hey, they'd all give me jobs. I was _affiliated_ with CJ's crew. People knew they could trust me to an extent, and I was truly a free agent…and, I was also a workhorse, some average Joe jerk-off who'd do the dirty work.

_Eh, my hands are still filthy, but now I worry about myself, making that paper…_

Even though I have to kick up, I like where I am now better. I can pick and choose what I do, and I technically own half this avenue now.

And now that money's better . . . I'm not shaking my neighbors down like I used to. I give 'em some wiggle room, having learned that I can't bleed people dry. Every business needs money to _make_ money. If I take everything…I don't want anybody going _outta_ business_. Fuck that shit_. The avenue ain't all franchised-out just yet, and we wanna keep it that way.

Plus, I live here and I don't wanna make a fuss where one isn't needed—draw attention to myself or any-fucking-thing.

"Where's Jazz?" he asked.

"I dunno," I replied without skipping a beat.

"Come on," he laughed. "You _know _where he is." Riley spoke with his hands.

As far as I know, Riley and Jasper have put past problems involving Alice to bed. However, Riley won't even look at Jasper, while Jasper would rather shit in his own hat than take orders from Riley.

Officially, Jasper works for Riley.

Unofficially, Jasper takes direction from me, and as Alice's boyfriend—and Colleoni's favorite of the week—he takes orders from the big man himself, too. We all do. Boss trumps Capo, and when Boss calls, we all do as he asks.

But Colleoni hasn't put Jasper in a position yet . . . has yet to ask Jazz to kill for him; meanwhile, I was approached to do that shit the first week I'd come to town. My godfather likes Jasper. He likes him for Alice, and he wants his daughter happy, so he tries to make Jasper happy.

"He took off early," I laughed, casual. "Why don't you call his cell?"

Riley waved a hand. "Fuck that…then he'll _run_."

I furrowed my brow, knowing my best friend doesn't run_ from_ anybody. Especially not this cat. "You gotta beef or a job you want him on, what?" I asked.

Riley sipped his coffee as he sent a text with his free hand. "It don't concern you."

I stared at him, wishing he'd elaborate.

If Riley has a problem with Jasper, he could rightfully pop him one and be done with it.

It's been done before.

Fuck. _I've _done that shit before, and I'm not even a captain. Case in point, Aldo. But I highly doubted that Riley had a legitimate beef. It was more than likely personal—something to do with Alice—which has nothing to do with anything.

Since it was closing time, and I had a bad feeling in my gut, I stopped eyeballing Riley and locked up while he just stood there drinking his coffee.

I didn't want him to leave.

"He should be back soon, though." I walked outside to lower the gate, looking up and down the block. Nothing was amiss. I didn't see Jasper. Riley didn't even have a driver. His Escalade was parked a few spaces up, and it wasn't running either.

After placing my phone on silent, I sent Jasper a text, telling him that Riley was here—asking him what was up.

Bending very low, I reentered the pizzeria to sigh. "Long fuckin' day, man." I hoped I seemed nonchalant.

"Alice don't know where he is either. The kid never leaves the avenue, and as soon as I'm lookin' for him…he's ghost." Riley laughed, massaging his forehead.

I didn't comment, waiting once more as I got the bank deposit ready.

And Riley was waiting, too—for Jasper.


	100. Chapter 100

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter One-Hundred**

Maybe Colleoni knew Riley was looking for Jazz, and that's why he called?

Nonetheless, I didn't know what I should do.

Logically, and even without knowing what his problem was, I wanted to intervene—ice Riley myself before anything happened to Jasper.

Or…I could always engage Riley into conversation, find out what's going on, and try to calm him down?

If it's about some bullshit that concerns Alice's ass…Fuck all that.

But if there's a mark on Jasper…

However, my godfather's family has been getting smaller and smaller, and Riley is his star. In my opinion, Riley's the son he never had because CJ was such a fuck-up.

"You know what time he'll be back?" Riley glanced to the clock overhead.

"Not exactly, but soon…" I zipped up the deposit bag.

At the same time, my phone rang, and it was a number I didn't recognize. "Hello?"

_"It's me."_ It was Colleoni. _"If anyone's there…it's not me."_

I actually chuckled. "Did you want me to bring any food home, baby?"

_"Very good."_ Colleoni commented.

"If you see Jasper—tell your brother he needs to come back to Sal's," I said, and Riley nodded next to me, agreeing.

_"I'm in the mood for a sandwich, yeah…with Rye bread. That sound good?"_ Colleoni asked.

As shocked as I was I didn't make a face. Whenever my godfather is ridiculously cryptic, it's code for whacking a fucker—basically doesn't matter how he puts it, how ridiculous. We've spoken about it in person. I understood what he was getting at.

Whichever way he worked it, Colleoni or whoever, made sure Riley was here…at closing time, and while I was to make the boss a sandwich. Riley was setup, but the joke's on me 'cause I'm just learning the punch.

"You got it, baby…with mayo?"

_"Tomato sauce…I like the color."_ Colleoni ended the call.

By now, I was more surprised he didn't call it gravy, and tomato sauce was a corny euphemism for blood. My godfather's usually a bit more creative.

"All right. See you soon." Smiling, I placed my phone in my pocket. "You know, she woke me up the other night." I faced Riley. "Bella wanted nachos at three a.m.!"

_True story._

Riley poured himself more coffee. "That always sucked, catering to every craving and taste bud." Even if it was a proper reply—related to what I'd said—his mind seemed a million miles away from my words. "I gots'ta be somewheres at ten…I'll wait a bit…Yo, if _you_ gotta go—"

"Nah…Jazz has to come back, go to the bank," I lied. "He'll be back in like fifteen minutes, regardless of wherever he is now…Help yourself to whateva. I gotta make some shit for Bella."

Riley was paying attention to his phone, but he nodded.

I walked to the back to lock that door.

With the gate almost closed in the front, I knew I had privacy, but I also knew Riley was definitely going to put up a fight.

And I was fucked, hypothetically caught with my pants down.

I wanted to kick my own ass when I realized I didn't have a silencer here.

_Fuck._

"What'cha makin'?" Riley shouted.

I grabbed a loaf of bread real quick. "Chicken parm hero. You want one?" As I looked over my shoulder, toward the counter, I grabbed a large knife.

"Sounds good." Riley was in the doorway, so I turned to take the breaded chicken out of the fridge.

When he left, I gave him a few seconds before I made my way to the door to spy him sitting at a booth. "You want extra cheese…?"

He waved a hand. "Doesn't matta'." Riley hadn't even looked up.

"A'ight." I rolled my eyes, turning back.

Then I cut up a loaf of bread, added the chicken, the sauce, and the cheese, and I put that shit in the microwave—not giving a fuck if he thought the mozzarella was chewy.

_If luck's on my side, he won't have the chance to take a bite._

For the record, I'd never make Bella's food in the microwave.

She's a savage these days, and I love watching her _gavone_ a whole sandwich in seconds, so it better taste good. Bella's fucking adorable. Loves her food, enjoys it to no end…and she can _gavone_ my cock anytime, too—

I shook my head, had to stop thinking about her.

The sooner I pulled this shit off, the sooner I could _be_ with her.

As the plate spun round and around, I grabbed a white dishrag, slightly wrapping the knife in it. When the microwave dinged, indicating it was done, I used that same cloth to take the plate out—Riley's dinner, although I hoped to serve him just dessert.

It was sad . . . in theory, him dying and all.

However . . .

At this part of the game, I wasn't nervous—_I didn't give a flying fuck_—confident in my mission while I walked out toward him.

That was . . . until Bella knocked on the gate, making it quake against the pan of windows. "Edward, it's me."

Closer to the kitchen, I was still a ways away, so Riley actually stood up to let her in—open the door and lift the gate.

Before he could make it, and while his back was turned, I did some sneaky shit. I took off at a sprint—dropping the plate to stab him, dig the knife deeply into him.

Riley stiffened, slightly shaking, his knees buckling.

I'd purposely gotten his spine, and I turned the knife, only to pull it out—knowing it was now severed.

"Edward, everything okay?" Bella knocked again.

His body thumped down onto the floor, his legs flailing just a little bit, as he met my gaze.

But he didn't say anything when I was sure he would.

His face registered shock, pain, and not much else.

Riley couldn't fight back; he was paralyzed and powerless, and I pulled the blade back to come down hard—stabbing him in his heart to put him outta his misery.

He heaved a short cough before his breath caught, blood spilling out the sides of his mouth.

When his eyes emptied, life leaving them, and his body relaxed, my shoulders drooped—the tension ebbing.

"Edward?" Bella knocked once more.

_She's adorable with impeccable timing_, I thought, which made me smile for the briefest of seconds.

I let out a large breath, my heart speeding up again. "I'm here," I said. "I have to clean up. I'll talk to you soon. Love you, baby."

Before she could even respond, I opened the door a couple of inches, sneaking my foot out to kick the gate shut all the way. Bella hadn't seen anything, as she couldn't bend that low anymore.

"Fuck." I spat.

Bella will jump to the dumbest conclusion—think I'm in here with some chick.

Since I knew Bella was probably waddling away slowly, I ran out the back, going past the dumpsters to hop the fence. There was actually no blood or anything on my hands, but I knew…taking this short break…there'd be a fucking mess and a half by the time I made it back to Riley.


	101. Chapter 101

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter 101**

Bella had just made it to the corner when I spotted her.

"Baby, wait!" I shouted, running, and she wasn't that far away.

Sadly, when she turned to face me—and because I was a little jittery—she knocked me with her bump, which actually knocked _me _on my ass, right onto the sidewalk.

She giggled, staring down to me. "Are you okay?"

I laughed, getting to my feet to pull my pants up and kiss those lips. "I just—had to make sure everything was cool. Everything's okay?"

She nodded, showing me her shopping bags from Babies 'R' Us, and they were pretty big for her to be hauling around. "I took the bus, and I got what we needed but people didn't get off the registry…" She trailed off. "Most stuff I had to order since I couldn't carry that much."

"Why didn't you call me? I could have gone to pick you up, or sent Jazz to get you."

"It'll be delivered tomorrow, but I got some clothes, too. Look!" She pulled out one of those baby bodysuit things, and it had a Yankees emblem on it, in dark blue.

"So cute." It truly was. "Why didn't you bring your cart?" I grabbed the heavy bags from her, and I noticed her palms and wrists were all red from holding them. I didn't like that. She's supposed to be slowing down, resting with her feet up; meanwhile, if I let her, Bella would probably try to paint the house or some crazy shit. Then again, she's always pushed herself, taken pain in stride…which I feel a certain way about but won't think about now.

"Well, walking is good for me. The doctor said—"

"But lugging heavy shit around ain't." I shook my head.

"Yo!" Jasper shouted, and he was half a block away. "Ed, I fuckin' peeped that shit! You got knocked down—taken out by my nephew, kid!" His words made Bella smile even wider, and she really has been happy these days. All of which…I'm ecstatic about that, and I don't plan to do anything to fuck it up. She's expressed her fears regarding the actual birth—she wants to do it natural or something—otherwise, she's excited.

We don't have long to go at all until our son is born—less than a week, that's it—and we've been getting busy a lot more. Once her doc said some shit about a six-to-eight-week stretch where…yo, I'd be cut off, we were both on board with having loads of sex.

Between the summer being torturous, us humping like animals, and then that dry spell where we'd only make love sporadically?

Now that sex is a normal occurrence . . . we'll be missing each other like crazy.

I mean, I can't toss her around or nothing like that, and I gotta be gentle. But, for some reason, I'm…a _very_ big fan of pregnancy-sex. Overall, being inside Bella is like nothing I've ever known, but as of very recent, the past couple days, her pussy feels even better—it's wetter and just slightly different? It's hard to explain.

We have loads of fun trying to navigate, though. She can't ride me like a pony anymore, which sucks. It's also difficult to eat some pussy. Her belly is lower, and my forehead places too much pressure on the bump. My tongue's not long enough for me to get in there, and I try while Bella has her back to me . . . I get a li'l somethin' somethin', a taste, but I can't reach the jackpot.

_Doggy-style and sideways sex are fucking amazing, though._

Besides that, Bella wants to name him after her father.

Knowing that her pops was a scumbag gambler who left his family high and dry, I had mixed feelings about it.

In Bella's eyes—because she was too little back then, and because everyone's suddenly a saint posthumously—he died shortly after her mother and that's all. Or, maybe she knows and just doesn't care?

I have no idea, but . . . it'd just be awesome to have an Edward Masino III, but only because of that "third" that'd follow?

I raised a brow at Jasper's smiling ass, and then turned back to Bella. "Can you do me a favor?"

She nodded. "Of course."

I placed another kiss on those lips, always wanting more. "In a minute, meet me at the door. I need you to drop the deposit off at Chase—you know what to do." It was only a street away, and her doctor wants her to take it easy but take short walks, too.

"Yeah, no problem—I'll drop it in the slot." She held her hand out for her bags.

"I'll bring these home later. They're heavy." Grasping her chin, I pulled her in for another smooch, deepening it quickly.

"No one needs to see that shit," Jasper laughed, and he looked jovial. "The back's open?"

I nodded even though it wasn't, pulling away from Bella. "I'll be home in a few."

She smiled up to me before I took off after Jasper.

Once he'd tried the locked door, he looked to me waiting.

I tried my best to tie both bags before tossing them to Jazz. "Catch." Then I climbed over the fence.

"Where is he?" he asked.

I jerked my head to the pizzeria, wiping my hands off on my apron, quick to grab my keys to open the door. "There's a fucking mess."

Jasper trailed in after me.

"Get the bleach and shit." My tone was hushed as I plopped the baby bags on the back table.

I ran up front, gazing at all the fucking blood. "Jesus."

Realization dawned me after grabbing the money for the bank.

And I had to run out the back again.

There was no way I could lift the gate, not even two inches to slip it through. Bella won't be able to bend and there was the possibility that Riley's corpse could roll out. "You fucking owe me." I pointed back to Jasper.

He stared at Riley, nodding.

Groaning, I rushed to make it back to Bella.

"Oh…" She was surprised, had walked back to the door, expecting me to just…lift the gate like a normal person.

"Sorry…Here." I huffed a breath, licking my bottom lip, and I was out of shape—a couple sprints, scaling the fence a few times had me heaving and shit.

"Can you bring home mozzarella sticks?" she asked, taking the small pencil-case from me.

I laughed. "You got it. Anything else?"

"Just you…" She pulled me close. "No, a Sunkist with a lot of ice, too."

I chuckled, pecking her lips.

"You'll be home soon, right? The girls didn't_ only_ get baby things for me." Bella had that flirty tone and that look in her eyes; she wants the D tonight...badly, which means freak-mode.

"Um…What-what'd they get you?" I asked, and my heart rate did not slow down, curiosity and being a perv getting me excited.

Bella grinned, blowing out a breath as she toyed with my apron strings. "It's purple and silky—"

"I'll be home as soon as I can…" I rushed out while I started running away from her.

She was still speaking when I ran around the corner again.

"I love you!" she hollered.

"Love you, too!" I boomed, grasping the fence to jump over once more.

Jasper was in the back smoking a cigarette.

"Whatta you doin'?" I widened my arms.

He looked away from me, flicking his ashes. "I just—"

I gripped his shirt, yoking him up and dragging him back inside to kick the door closed. "You're cleaning _with_ me!"

"All right!" His showed me his palms, surrendering.

I paused to stare at his green face. "Seriously?"

My friend looked to the ground. "Just tell me what you need me to do."

Groaning and laughing, I turned in a circle, trying to think that one out. "You know what? Take his keys and get rid of his whip. Put on some gloves, bring it to the crusher, and then you're coming back here—make your sister her cheese sticks, and drop those bags off with them, and then _you bring your car back_." I pointed to the floor. ". . . And Jasper, God help you if she's sleeping when I get home!"

"Your trunk is bigger—"

"No, you're getting rid of that piece of shit clunker once and for all." I nodded, turning to get the box of trash bags. "You can afford a new one or another hoop-dee. It's a huge mess…" I didn't want my car to be bloodstained.

"I'm glad…thanks for doing what you did." He pushed his hair back. "But you just did what Colleoni said, no questions asked?" Jasper stared at me. "You're like…his chief assassin now?"

I shrugged, going toward the front to start cleaning. "An order's an order."

And I knew . . .

Deep down, I knew . . . with Riley out of the game, there was a chance I might be appointed capo of our crew.

Joshie-Bones, this dude Joshua, is higher than me in the chain of command, but you never know. The odds _could_swing in my favor.

I'd be a different captain. I'd stay under the radar, dealing with my people secretly.

Plus…low-man to capo within a year?

That's got to be some kind of record, and I'd be a legend, and I could stop the two-bit heist shit. I'd be put on to larger scores, have people working_ for_ me and _with_ me.

Colleoni will want someone with a huge pair to step up to the plate . . . and I'm his godson.

With his family getting smaller, other organizations here in New York are starting to encroach on our territory.


	102. Chapter 102

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Tribute**

**Chapter 102**

Since there was no way we could get Jasper's whip into the back alley . . .

I had to be creative.

It wasn't like I could drag a corpse—covered or not—out onto Eighteenth Avenue and pretend it's garbage.

And since we'd be stopping by the butcher shop . . .

Well, there's no set way on how to get rid of a fucker, but I just assumed we'd make him disappear. Besides Colleoni and Jasper, nobody else knew a damn thing.

Riley vanishing into thin air seemed legit.

I got to cutting.

The front was cleaned up already.

Jasper brought Bella her food, soda, and the baby stuff, and I continued to toss pieces of Riley into the bag-lined trash can. His head was the first thing to go—so I didn't have to look at it, and then his limbs followed in pieces.

"Oh, God…" Jasper gagged.

"Enough of that!"

"I'm-I'm not eating anything from here no more." He yakked in the neighboring sink, retching loudly.

I slumped my shoulders. "You're comin' with me, Jazz…You're gonna pick him up piece by piece—_bit by motherfucking bit_—and toss 'em into the fuckin' grinder."

He coughed, puking some more.

I chuckled, disconnecting the calf bone from the knee, which was the last limb I had to disassemble. "Get me that other garbage can."

Jasper nodded, practically covering his eyes as he brought it over to me.

"Pussy," I commented, watching him mosey around. "Put a fucking bag in it—'the fuck I'mma do with an empty pail, heh? Wise-up!" I was pissed.

_Bella's feeling all kinky and I'm here, playing the most fucked up game of Operation ever . . _.

"Oh God—"

"Shut ya mouth!" I snapped. "Why'd I do this anyway? Care to explain that? Since when does Colleoni hate Riley? His biggest earner?" While I waited for a reply, I realized something.

Technically, I was done here, and I lifted his torso to plop it into the other empty can.

Jasper leaned over the sink to vomit once more, but nothing came out. "I can smell the blood, the shit…everything."

I rolled my eyes, wiping the sweat on my cheek off with my shoulder, and my gaze landed on my brand new boots. "Fuck. I liked these."

"You're worried about your shoes?"

"Start talkin'!" I grabbed the bottle of bleach to clean out the sink and scoop up any bits that might be left over.

"It's a long story . . . " he said, which is always a start.

Then a good five minutes had passed where Jazz hadn't uttered another word, and I focused on the task at hand.

It was already fucking midnight. Fuck.

"Get another bag," I told him. "Bring the box over and start loading the rags and shit—the mop heads." Those had to be burned along with our clothes.

Jasper hopped to it, and I was grateful for his help, but I meant what I said.

Bella sent me a text earlier, saying she was waiting up for me.

Jasper was manning the grinder, so I could go home.

"I would'a looked out for you. We could'a buried him somewhere, tossed him somewhere so there could be a funeral—"

"It's done," I said, soaping up my hands, arms, and chest to clean myself. My jeans and shoes were fucked, but I'd taken off my shirt. Not that it matters. "Grab me the sweats and shit from the office." I was glad I at least had a change of clothes here.

After changing, I smoked a cigarette while Jasper mopped the floor once more. We had quite a few garbage bags that we needed to load into his car, only for us to drive to the pork store's back alley, which is two blocks away.

"Because of Alice?" I asked him.

He smirked at me as he tossed the head of the mop into the trash. "It's a long story."

"You've said." I widened my arms. "You're a parrot all of a sudden…repeatin' shit."

"What's that you tell me?" He still wore a grin, but that won't last long. "You'll know when you need to."

"Okay." I hopped from the counter, ready to get going already. "I'll accept that…for now."

With the front locked up, we brought all the bags outside before I gave the kitchen a quick once-over. When shit was cool, I fastened the back deadbolt, and opened the fence since there was no way we were literally _tossing_ those bags around.

Casually, I looked up and down the empty block as I brought a few bags out, throwing them into the back seat before starting the car.

Once Jazz heard his beat-up engine, he knew it was cool to load the rest.

I jumped out of the car once we'd made it to the butcher shop. "Don't forget to give these back to me." Slapping the keys into his palm, I wore a smile.

"What…?" He stared at me wide-eyed, like I spoke Greek.

"I did all the hard work." My hand landed on my chest, and I truly did. "The grinder's huge, all right? You put on some gloves, a mask—bro, you don't even gotta fuckin' look." I hit his shoulder. "Mind the afterspray—you look away, and then just start tossin' him in…bit by bit."

Jasper gulped.

I snapped my fingers, trying to think up the name. "The leg bone—the big thigh one, that's a hard fucker. You'll hafta push 'em in…use muscle, not too much."

"Femur," he whispered.

"Yeah, okay. Look—" I gazed around the alleyway, pushing my hair back "—I know you wanna hear this even less, okay? Or, maybe you don't care. But I'm about to have a baby, and your sister's waitin' up for me. She wants to fuck, and I'll be damned if I miss that shit farting around, playing gangster wit'chu. Bella yakked less than that in her first trimester...You got nothin' left in there." I pointed to his stomach. "You'll be good."

Honestly, I was deathly fucking serious. I wasn't playing around. "You'll be done in an hour—less than, and then you lock up, clean up a little bit after you take out _that _trash, put all cloths in the incinerator, and then get rid of _your_ car."

He swallowed again. "Yeah…I got this."

"You do." I patted his bicep.

"Right." He nodded.

"You got this!" My voice held some conviction as I backed away from his car.

Then I practically ran home.


	103. Chapter 103

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

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**Chapter 103**

_**A**_s soon as I got home, I walked around the back to take off my kicks, hiding them under the porch. I'd have to get rid of them tomorrow.

The TV was on in the living room, and Bella was nodding out in front of me. She looked gorgeous yet sleepy in a long silky nightgown.

"Hey, baby." I kissed her cheek.

Her lids fluttered open as she smiled, but then she scrunched her nose. "You smell…like bleach and—"

I sighed, kissing her lips. "I need a shower. I'll meet you in bed?"

"Well…" She rubbed her stomach.

"What happened?" It wasn't beneath me to beg, although I'd never fucking force her—go overboard and make her feel obligated.

She yawned, trying to sit up. I grasped her hand to help, and she rose from the couch. "I know this is TMI, but we're having a baby together," she said.

"You can tell me anything." I furrowed my brow. "What's up?"

After what I just did, I doubt Bella could_ top_ that and gross me out—_for realz_.

"I'm not supposed to push, and I keep feeling like I have to go to the bathroom, like bad. So, I sit on the toilet…" She waddled toward the stairs.

"Oh…A good, you know." I punched the air. "It might loosen things up." Tickling her side, I leaned my chest to her back, supporting her on her way up the steps.

She giggled. "It's just uncomfortable…like every fifteen, twenty minutes or something, I feel like I gotta go." She let out a labored breath at the top of the stairs, and I felt bad.

"Baby," I placed a smooch in her neck "Just go to sleep then."

"You think I'm nasty—"

"No way," I laughed. "No fucking way, baby." My hand palmed her cheek. "If you're not feelin' good—"

She smiled. "I feel okay now…um, it's okay. Just hurry up before I feel I gotta go again. I know I'll be going back and forth—all night—until I finally go to the bathroom." Bella's smile disappeared. "Sex will probably take my mind off it."

"I'll be out in ten minutes." I ran into the bathroom, and then I cursed the old pipes.

It took a minute before the water warmed.

Nevertheless, I thought better, wetting the soap to lather up while my shower got hotter.

I was rinsing off when I placed shampoo in my hair.

"How long you gonna be?" Bella asked.

"A minute or two—five at the most."

"Oh…" Bella whined, and a blur of purple plopped onto the toilet.

I pulled the glass door back.

"Don't look at me!"

I chuckled. "It's fine. Do what you gotta do." Shaking my head, I placed it under the spray to get rid of the soap. "I'll…fuck ya right there on the toilet."

_Edward Masino don't fuck around. _

"What?" She huffed.

"I love you!" I shouted.

She hummed but it sounded painful as I turned off the water.

"You okay?" I asked, grabbing a towel. "We should call your doc—ask about laxatives."

"Nothing!" She groaned, flushing the toilet before going to the sink. "I'm fine now. Let's go." Bella flicked more water at me and then turned for our bedroom.

Naked and almost dry, I followed, like the lovesick fool I was.

I swear to Christ, my dick was hard by the time we made it to the room from the thought alone.

"We had sex yesterday." Bella sat on the bed. "And the day before…How can you be so horny?" she giggled; my Bella doesn't understand men at all. But I didn't have a _real_ answer for her. Bella's sexy as sin. We're young. I get to hit it without a rubber.

I just want her—my woman—all the time.

_I can't help it. _

While pregnancy-sex is awesome, I can't wait until she's back to normal, so we can make love even more often.

But my mind flew away from me, wondering why Bella _doesn't _want me every day.

Well, not that she doesn't want me, but that it's not as important to her?

_She has her moments, I guess. _

I also know women get their perv on, too.

_Right?_

And Bella _is_ very sexual . . .

"Edward?" She quirked a brow. "You okay?"

"I'm a man…That's why." I shrugged, bending low to kiss her. "You make me horny all the time because you're _you_, my Bella, my sexy woman."

Bella beamed. "I like the second one better."

"Me too," I agreed, letting out a sigh as my hands ran down her biceps. The silk was hella soft, but I reached to pull it away from her.

"Don't think I don't want to." She placed her hands on top of mine. "I do…I just feel uncomfortable _all the time_. I don't feel sexy at all, no matter what you say." Bella's lips became a straight line. "I was so excited before, but now that my stomach is bothering me…Um." She stopped me from getting on the bed.

"We don't have to," I said. "You're not feeling good and you don't wanna—we've spoken about this, baby." I knew.

Deep down, I knew she'd have sex with me anyway—whether she wanted to or not—and I hated that.

"No," she whispered. "I do…Edward, I pass the time thinking—" Her words just stopped.

"Thinking?" I twirled a lock of her hair around my fingers. "What do you think about?"

"You." She ran her fingers along my left pec. "You're all I think about—everything about you."

"Are they fantasies? 'Cause we can—" The side of my mouth pulled up while I leaned to capture hers. Bella's kiss was fierce and passion-filled, making me groan, and I wanted her even more.

I left her before I got carried away. "Damn, baby."

She cleared her throat, resting her forehead to my abs. "Can we just focus on getting each other off? You do me and then you…do you?" Bella gave me this toothy grin.

"Hot." I pushed her hair away from her neck, and then my body convulsed when she reached out to jack my cock. "Fuck..."

When she licked her lips and came toward me, my breath caught.

She sucked me deep, and I rose to my toes, moaning in pleasure. "Was that hot?" She jerked me.

I nodded. "Lie down."


	104. Chapter 104

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter 104**

Bella sucked me off some more, and then I made her come with my tongue—her glorious ass in the air. It was the best sight, and I couldn't wait to get down to business. She was so fucking wet; I almost thought she'd squirted or some shit. Bella was slippery, warm…

If I'd come in Bella's mouth, we would have never gotten to the fucking.

While we lay on our sides, my lips traveled all around Bella's neck, as one hand toyed with her clit. And my other, which was hooked underneath her, tweaked her left nipple.

It's a lovemaking system that we've gotten down after some practice, and it never fails.

Bella's squirming, thrusting forward into my hand—moaning, sighing, and whimpering—and I knew she was close to having _another_ orgasm. "Lift your leg, baby," I whispered.

She groaned, doing as I said, her ass flush against my abs.

Then I lined us up, bringing my fingers back to her clit before I pushed forward. "Christ." I spat; she felt so good, and she was still soaked . . .

"Edward..." She reached behind herself to pull my hair. "Ugh…oh my God, you feel amazing." Bella let out another throaty groan, which was pretty deep.

I bit, licked, and nipped at her neck—albeit sloppily—again while I pumped in and out of her. "You okay?" I always try to be as gentle as possible, but sometimes it seems _im_possible.

"Yes! Yes! Oh God, yes!" She tightened around me, letting out a strangled cry that was very fucking sexy. My hips went faster as a growl vibrated my chest. "Edward..." Bella's hand trailed up my forearm. "Get your pussy—fuck me, fuck me, fuck me," she chanted.

I love it when she talks dirty—drives me insane, her sweet, soft voice saying all those nasty things . . .

I threatened to come at that, but I held on, which was useless—futile.

I sucked my lip into my mouth, holding my breath to control myself; meanwhile, the vigor of my strokes picked up. "Love you." I grabbed her tit.

"Easy," she sighed.

"Sorry." I nibbled on her earlobe, panting, breathing heavily now, and I was about come.

"Um…can you—"

"Yes," I answered, my eyes rolling and my body stiffening as I'd gone as deep as I could to lose my shit. "Damn...God, baby…you feel so good." I kissed her cheek, neck, and lips as I continued my mumbled praises.

She just doesn't know how good she feels.

Maybe if Bella could literally fuck herself, she'd want sex morning, noon, and night.

I know she feels unattractive, is uncomfortable most of the time. And I try not to take it personally, but sometimes I do—wondering if her recent lack of desire is my fault, if I'm doing something wrong.

_Hey, I just made her come twice._

I mean…

"Get out." She tapped my thigh.

I collapsed onto my back to chuckle, but then I hopped to help Bella up. "Bathroom?" I asked, leaving the bed with her.

"Um…" She furrowed her brow, her hands on her stomach. "No…hospital." She started breathing heavily, like she was about to hyperventilate. "Christ. It's happening, I think."

Confused and suddenly scared, I fussed over her. "What—why?"

Bella stared down, and I watched as the purple silk became darker—wet—like she peed.

"Don't be embarrassed." I kissed her forehead. "It's okay. We'll take another shower."

"Edward!" She slapped my chest. "My water broke!"

I blinked. "You're, um—" I turned in a circle. "Okay. The hospital." I nodded, ushering her out of the bedroom.

"You're naked!" She pushed me back.

"Fuck!" I ran to find clothes. "Wait for me!"

"Where _the fuck_ am I goin'?" she barked at me and then started crying.

"Shhh!" I jumped into some jeans, and I almost caught my balls with the zipper, which made my heart pound away some more.

"I—I should change, too." She walked to her chest of drawers.

I made myself useful and helped Bella into some sweats and a T-shirt.

"It's going to be fine." I kissed her lips, glad we slowed for a second.

"You need a shirt, and I need shoes…"

"Easy, baby." I bent low to place her feet into her sneakers while she held my shoulders. Her nails dug into my skin, but I didn't care. "You're okay…Remember the doc told us not to panic?" Even I didn't buy that bullshit last week. No matter what we were told, I knew we'd panic, and we were currently panicking.

Bella closed her eyes, relaxing, only to open those peepers wide. "We don't have a bag packed like the doctor told us, and I was just there. I dropped a little, but . . . and the seat isn't even in the car. There's so much we still have to do—"

I pulled a shirt on, and I kissed her lips as I started to button it. "Baby, we have time for that." I hoped we did. "Relax…Women have babies all the time…in bushes and the desert—"

"You and the fuckin' desert!" Yup, she was panicking, too—just not as subtle. "I live in the first world, Edward! The first! I'm not…I _need_ a fuckin' hospital!" Even after her short rant, she was still unsure of her own words. "Okay?"

"Yeah. Okay…" My insides were shaking and then I realized my hands were, too, when I tried to put another pair of boots on. "Get it together, Masino," I told myself, balling my hands into tight fists.

"I'm sorry," Bella whispered.

"Just…whateva gets you through this." Once again, we left our bedroom.

"Oww. Now I feel like I really gotta go. It hurts more." She held her stomach, cringing and stiffening, leaning on the hall wall.

"Um….remember to breathe," I whispered, watching her face turn pink, red, and then almost purple. "Breathe!" I gently hit her back.

Bella gasped for air. "Fuck…go away, go away," she chanted, her eyes closed, and then she nodded. "I'm okay."

"Good." I felt like I could breathe again, too.

"Oh my God…What time is it?" She turned back to me, still grimacing, which made me think she was still in pain.

I huffed, looking to the cable box in our bedroom since my phone was still in the bathroom. "It's ten after two."

"I didn't hafta shit—I never had to shit." She blew out a large breath. "I'm okay—um, the first time was like an hour before you came home...They-they were contractions, but they didn't hurt that bad…hurts more now."

"I've been home about an hour…Wow!"

She held up a finger, indicating I be quiet while the silent seconds ticked by. "Okay." She gasped another large breath, nodding and calming. "Let's go before another one comes." Bella rushed for the stairs. "That one was crazy long, too."

I ran to the bathroom for my cell and wallet, and then I helped her down the steps. She hadn't gotten far without me. "We'll get your pocketbook and your coat, and we'll get in the car..." My lips lingered on her cheek.

I was trying to keep her relaxed while I was going nuts.

Believe it or not, shaky hands or steady, I was trying my hardest not to show it—to be cool, calm, and collected for my lady.

* * *

**Thank you for reading. **

**I promise to update SOON! **

**Coming up . . . THE BABY!**


	105. Chapter 105

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter 105**

As soon as Bella was strapped in, I took off.

We rode along the quiet streets, and we didn't have to go far—the local hospital less than a mile away. Bella also called Jasper. When we'd passed his crib, the car wasn't there, but the light in the living room was on. Alice was either there, or Jasper did well with time—got rid of his whip and was home. I had no idea, but Bella called Alice next.

Once they knew where we were headed, Bella seemed to relax a little more.

That was until another contraction hit.

My woman wasn't shrieking and screaming out in pain like they do in the movies.

She'd whimper, breathe heavily, and she was scared, so occasional tears would fall.

Bella told me she was petrified while also being excited, and I kept telling her that it'd be fine.

_I hoped . . . _

The truth was…I was so fucking scared.

I was happy to be driving, doing something I can do with little to no thinking.

My hands were busy and we were confined.

Otherwise, I swore I was about to burst.

It was cool, though…

We had shit to do, and I had no time to explode.

There was no time for it, which meant I couldn't.

"Get out. I gotta park." We were right by the entrance.

Bella was okay at the moment. "I'll walk with you…I want—"

I peeled away to find a spot, and I parked in a handicapped slot, not giving a fuck.

"You'll get towed—"

"I don't care." I went to leave the car, forgetting that my seat belt was on.

While I was glad Bella had a chuckle at that, I needed to pull myself together. "Stay!" I shouted and ran to grab a wheelchair.

There were a couple by the exit, and I snatched one before security approached me.

"My wife's in labor!"

He nodded, letting me take it, but when I turned to go get Bella, she was waddling through the automatic doors.

I slumped my shoulders. "Why are you walking…?" I made her get in the chair.

"I can walk," she whispered, her nose still red from the tears she'd shed.

"No…" I started pushing her toward the emergency room, where I was told to write Bella's name down.

They didn't seem to grasp the concept that my woman was about to push a human being—albeit a tiny one—out of her snatch.

It could happen at any moment, and nothing—no one put on a catcher's mitt, no one came to wheel her back, no one cared.

"She's about to have a baby!"

The nurse didn't even look up to me. "Can you please sign her name at the bottom of the list—"

"You're just sitting there when…Yo—" I opened the glass partition "—she's in labor!"

The nurse glanced at Bella, who was just sitting there rubbing her belly. "We'll call you." She closed the window.

I whipped to Bella. "Start crying again—_do_ somethin'!"

She grabbed my hand. "They're going to take me right back. Relax." She made a face, was obviously in pain again. "We've been here…like…two minutes, not even."

"Look!" I shouted, pointing to Bella.

The nurse didn't give a fuck.

"I'm okay," Bella lied through a huff. "They'll take me back…" She continued to pant. "Then—then if-if it's real—"

"How would it_ not_ be real?" I asked, gesturing to the bump.

"If it's not-not—" She slumped in the chair, relaxing, and she looked how she does after a good orgasm. "Whew…" Bella stared up to the ceiling and then back to me. "If it's not false labor, they'll send me up to maternity…sit." She pulled on my arm.

I shook my head, starting to pace as I'd throw occasional glares at that bitch nurse.

"Wait! My water broke!" Bella hollered. "I've been in labor for close to two hours!"

"Yo, you hear that?" I banged on the glass.

The nurse hung up the phone.

And then…we were escorted to the maternity ward.

_Dead-ass. _

We bypassed the emergency room.

That nurse said something about it not being Toni Braxton contractions…? I had no fucking clue, and I tried my best to handle Bella's paperwork after we got her into a gown.

**...0.o...**


	106. Chapter 106

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter 106**

My hands shook as I filled in our insurance information.

"We were supposed to have done that already," Bella sighed. "You want me to do it? I have the cards in my wallet."

I shook my head, leaning to kiss her cheek. "You rest."

"I feel a lot better…since we're here." She eased back against the pillows. "Wanna watch TV?" She turned on the set overhead.

I couldn't believe how calm she was suddenly.

_Bella, the girl who used to cry over everything. _

Maybe I have what Bella has—able to stuff my capo into trash bags, but filling out paperwork, about to have a baby makes me feel like puking—since I'm nervous.

"Take off your coat. You're all sweaty." She made that face again, cringing.

I put the clipboard down to grasp her hand. "You'll be okay."

Bella's doctor came into the room at that exact moment. They were fast to instruct her to place her feet in those things, and they put…a monitor, strapped some device on her stomach.

It was a blur of activity, and I was dizzy.

People were talking, their voices garbled and distorted.

Everyone sounded like Charlie Brown's teacher.

_Wah-wah-wah-wah-wah . . . _

This was it.

"We don't have a name," I blurted, and she's worried about the car seat. "Whatta we gonna call him?"

Bella's contraction was over, and she breathed deeply. "We'll figure it out." She held my hand again.

I nodded, looking down to the doctor.

He was already poking around and feeling on her belly.

"Um…"

His gaze met mine. "We have a long ways to go." He faced Bella, taking off his gloves. "You're _about_ three centimeters dilated. There's also no distress, the baby's heart rate is great—strong, but it could be a while, and you live in the area. Isabella, we'll monitor you for about an hour. If you still intend to do this naturally, your pain doesn't get any worse, and there's no change, you _can_ go home, get some rest—"

"What?" I shouted. "Her water broke!"

"Edward—"

I ignored Bella. "Look, we can't leave."

_I'd die if we did; I swore I would. _

_I _would die of a heart attack.

The doctor showed us his palms. "That's fine. You guys should try and get some sleep then. Like I said, it could be a while. I'll be back to check on Isabella in a bit."

When he left the room, I collapsed down into a chair.

The nurse grinned at me as she covered Bella's legs with a blanket.

"What are you smilin' at?" I asked.

"Edward!" Bella snapped at me.

"Your first baby?" The nurse looked to Bella and then me again.

We both nodded.

"It wasn't even planned," I explained, gesturing to the baby. "We just—you know."

She laughed. "I'm Angela. I'll be your nurse."

"She thought she had to shit…" I had no idea why I felt the need to speak, but the people taking care of Bella should know everything. They need to put all the pieces together.

"Call if you need anything." She chuckled while she left the room.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

Bella was giggling, too. "Come here. Come sit with me." She scooted to the other side of the bed.

I waved both hands, disagreeing. "I touch you—bad shit happens. I mean, we fuck—_you get pregnant_. We fuck—_you go into labor_."

"You think it's a bad thing?" Her face slowly crumbled. "Since when?"

"No, no, no." I rushed to get in bed with her now. "I mean, I'm bad luck. I don't know. I'm excited—I'm-I'm—"

Bella drew in a shaky breath. "It's okay to be scared. You said that."

"I did…" I munched on my lip.

"Edward—" she made me look at her "—take off your coat. You're soaked, all sweaty." She grinned, her hand coming up to push my hair back. "Even your hair's wet."

"Okay." I stood up to lose my jacket, but then I shrugged it back on. "I need a cigarette. Uh..."

"Edward, I'm fine. Go smoke and just come back. Wait—" Bella sat up a bit to stare at me "—_you're_ _going to_ come back, right?" She sounded mad now, fire in her eyes, and then another contraction hit.

"Of course." I nodded. "Of course. I'll be back in ten minutes—not even. How can you think I'd leave you?" That hit a nerve, wondering what was going on in her head. "Never, baby. T-ten minutes. That's-that's it," I stammered, noticing her face was almost purple. "Baby…?"

"You act like _you're_ in labor!" Bella bit out. "_I_ gotta do the hard shit! You don't get to sit there and look like some cute—some, some cute, nervous and sexy wreck that makes the nurses laugh!" She ranted that shit out and slumped back to breathe deeply.

"I dunno what I did," I said. "I'll be mean—I'll make her cry if you want." I grasped her hand.

I just really needed to smoke a bone and calm myself—take a minute and get my head together.

But I couldn't leave just yet.

"I _just_ have to push our baby out…Christ, I hope his head isn't as big as yours," she whimpered. "They're getting stronger. I don't know if I can do this natural."

Like always, I couldn't bounce until Bella wore a smile . . .

"Say something," she whined.

"Whichever way," I said. "And he has a baby head. It'll be smaller than my dome. You know?" Leaning over, I kissed her stomach. "He's only…seven pounds maybe? And some change?" That's what the doctor said last week. "He'll have a peanut baby head." My mind started to travel. "I hope it's not too small, like it matches his body—"

"I'm sorry," she whispered through a labored breath, though she was fine—her contraction was over. Bella actually seemed embarrassed, flicking through the channels. "_Mean Girls_ is on."

"I know." I snorted, wondering why _she_ was being mean.

_If there's no "I" in team, there best be no "mean" either. _

But I deserved it, as I wasn't holding up my end of the bargain, pulling my weight by being Bella's rock.

Still nervous, I thought half of my bullshit stemmed from a lack of nicotine.

Her eyes slowly came back to mine.

"What?" I asked.

"Go smoke. And try to find your balls!" she barked. "I think you left them somewhere in the parking lot!"

"Oh!" I shouted, her words snapping my mind into place. "Yo…that was uncalled for." Leaning closer, I brought my voice down. "And if you need to be nasty, don't fuckin'...Everybody gotta know I'm nervous?" I spluttered, glancing over my shoulder while hoping she could tone the verbal abuse down.

I'm not a sensitive guy, far-fucking-from it, but I felt insanely out of character at the moment.

She rubbed her stomach. "You can't do this. You're supposed to—just go smoke." Her lip quivered. "I wish I had a mom, you know? I love you, but…sometimes…stuff like this…in the movies, the meddling mother-in-law usually keeps the husband calm, fussing over the one in labor." She had some misconceptions, too, thanks to Hollywood. "I play house, trying to be perfect, trying to be everything _you need_, and now there's gonna be a tiny person…He's going to rely on us for _everything_. Everything, Edward. And I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know anything."

I didn't know what to say about her mom. Those words broke my heart. "We'll be fine. We have more than enough money—"

"Financially, sure." She looked away from me. "Edward, I'm nineteen. I get it. We both had nine months where we should have realized, _how real_ this is, how it's such a huge responsibility . . . And I'm trying my best. But besides giving birth…we're having a baby, _and they're gonna let us leave with him in two days, maybe less_," she whispered that last part, as though she didn't want anyone to hear. "We get to keep him. We're having a baby, bringing a human into the world we hafta care for. And we don't know what we're doing," she cried. "What if we do something wrong—"

"You're wonderful at everything you do." I didn't even have to think about that. "Bella, you've matured a lot. You're taking these contractions like a champ, baby. A real tough guy, tougher than me—a fuckin' champ." I sat to her side, massaging her shoulder. "I'm sorry. I'm just scared…like you said, but I am here."

My lips lingered on her temple. "I love you…and you know a lot more than you think. I mean, you've always taken great care of me. And as much as Jazz looked out for you, you cared for him in return. You've cared for all those children you babysat for…the real small babies, too. Those moms trust you…I think you need to have more faith in yourself." I nodded to _my_self, thinking what I said was awesome and spot-on, and very supportive. "We'll be okay. If he smells, we change his diaper. He cries, we feed him. It's not like we'll be able to forget, and what else is there?" In hindsight, all that stuff seemed simple enough.

Huh…that calmed me some.

Plus, my Bella is a natural caregiver.

"I guess..." She sniffed. "I love you, too, but it's not that simple—"

"We'll be fine, and we'll do it all together." I gave her hand a squeeze. "Right? I could never do it without you." Her words scared the fuck outta me even more. But I know Bella won't leave me high and dry with our kid, nor would she take off with our child. "Together, baby."

"Together." She cracked a small grin, and I found myself smiling back. "I don't regret anything." Bella searched my eyes. "That's not what I mean...I'm nervous and then I can't wait. I feel too much right now."

"But we'll be okay." I nodded, believing that with my whole heart. "We're gonna take him home, and we'll do that together, too. I bet it'll be fun, and I'm not going anywhere." I pushed her hair away from her neck. "I need you to get that out your head. Just because I need a cigarette—"

"I was being silly," she whispered.

"Don't." I nipped her lips.

Less than ten minutes and another contraction later, I wanted a cigarette even more. But I made sure she wasn't wincing in pain and being all mean before I left.

Bella was watching her movie, trying to relax with the lights off. The doctor said we had a long way to go. Even though Bella denied the pain, numbing shot—which I wanted her to get, because seeing her in agony yet trying to be brave, tore me up inside—the nurse hinted she nap.

"I'll be right back." I landed a smooch on those lips. "You want anything?"

"I don't think I'm allowed to eat or…but I am thirsty. On your way back, see if I can have water?" She kissed me on the mouth once more.

"You got it," I said.

Then I hauled ass down to the parking lot . . . when I should have gotten Bella's water first.

I wanted to kick my own sorry ass_ for_ Bella.

As soon as I lit up, I was practically fucking chased away by security.

This time, they didn't give a fuck if I was about to become a father. It's a no-smoking campus or something, so I sat in my car—smoked on the low. Technically, I was in my own…property? It made sense and no one bothered me.

While I was on my way back up, I actually ran into Jasper and Alice.

"Where's the fire?" Jazz stopped me by the elevators.

"Your sister's about to have a fuckin' baby. My baby!" I spat.

"Jesus. We know," Jazz laughed. "Yo…relax." He patted my back.

"I know…I know," I agreed with him.

"My parents are on their way," Alice said, squeezing my arm.

The elevator dinged and we hopped on.

It was way past visiting hours, but as long as we kept it quiet, Jasper and Alice could stay.

"Did you get my water?" she asked, mid-contraction, face purple and all.

"Shit!" I ran out of the room.

"Stop him!" Bella shouted.

Ignoring her, I went in search for her nurse again. She was in another room with another woman. "Excuse me…? I'm sorry."

Bella's nurse had wide eyes. "Everything okay?"

"Can Bella have something to drink?" I asked.

"I'll send someone in with ice chips. If you don't mind…" She shooed me away, waving her hand.

I backed out of the room, waving to the other expectant mother. "Good luck."


	107. Chapter 107

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Tribute**

**Chapter 107**

Jasper met me in the hall. "You need to chill the fuck out," he whispered, yet he looked a little pale himself.

I noticed that now. "You're nervous too."

"Nah, bro. My stomach's still turning." He grimaced. "But…having a baby? That's not a bad thing. It's a blessing. You're making Bella nervous. She's worried about you when she should focus on—"

"I'm making _her_ nervous?" I asked.

"You're running around like a fuckin' nutjob. It's cool to be whichever way, but you can't scream and run around the hospital, man." He placed his arm over my shoulders. "People are gonna think you're legit crazy."

I nodded. "You're right. Um…I don't wanna make it worse for Bella. I need to—"

"You got this." He mimicked me from earlier, showing mad enthusiasm. "If I could do what I just did? Edward…come on, man."

"It's _just_ a baby," I said.

"Exactly." Jazz chuckled. "Piece of cake."

Before we reentered Bella's room, I leaned back against the wall, trying to get my breathing even, my heart to slow, and my mind to calm.

"That's it. Just take a minute." Jasper was so encouraging.

I nodded, looking up and down the hall. "Just talk to me for a second." What happened earlier flooded my mind, which was a good thing. And I still couldn't believe how nervous I was now.

Women have babies every day.

Men become fathers every day.

We were at the hospital.

Bella was in capable hands.

Nothing was emergent.

I had to keep reminding myself of those facts, but five to ten minutes of distracting conversation never hurt anybody.

"What happened?" I asked him.

Jasper stared at the floor, holding his lips. "I'm gonna propose…to Alice."

My eyes widened. "Seriously? I knew youse were fuckin', but...for real?"

He nodded.

"How did…what'shisface, or what did he…?" I waved a hand.

"Colleoni found out about their past," he whispered. "And that…Colleoni was pissed. Top earner, shining star, nothing—he didn't give a fuck after he found out. Having an affair with his daughter, Alice being half his age, knockin' her up, _making_ her abort it…It didn't sit well with the old man."

My eyes became slits. "How'd he find out?" I knew the answer already.

"Apparently, someone heard me that day—when I was shouting?" he lied, a mischievous gleam in his eyes, and he needn't bother being dishonest with _me_. I'm actually indifferent to the whole situation—don't care. It's done. "Rye's number's been up for months—fuckin' months." He chuckled. "Colleoni used him for a few things, jobs he needed done…and then someone told Rye what Colleoni knew."

"And all fingers pointed to you." I grinned.

"Yeah, Rye assumed it was me, was coming for me."

I hummed, knowing the latter points all made sense. "Who told Riley?" If there was another rat in the house it'd be disheartening.

Jasper studied his boots.

"Who?" I sounded like a fucking owl. "If someone's playin' telephone, playin' sides and runnin' back and forth..." I tried to level with him. "That's not someone I need to be associating with."

"Rye—he drew his _own_ conclusion, thinking it was me who spilled the beans. Recently, Ali fought with her dad, and that's when he brought it up. It's why she's been staying with me when she's not at school. Colleoni confronted Alice about the situation." He winced. "So...Alice tipped him off."

I widened my arms, wondering how he could be so serious about Alice when she basically sold him out.._.if_ she knew it was Jasper who told her dad.

"She doesn't think _I_ told her pops." He shrugged. "Alice trusts me. Besides, Colleoni brought it up, and Alice knew he might—"

"You believe that?" I laughed. "Jazz..."

"Alice was upset...she told me _all about_ tellin' Rye to leave town, the whole thing. She was mad at me for gettin' loud that day, letting others know their business...but that's it. There were mad people out and about that day, what with CJ gettin' raided and shit. Alice even denied it, telling her father it was gossip." He pushed his hair back. "She trusts me—trusts that I wouldn't tell her father something like that, and she knows people instigate, start trouble."

"All right." I was on the fence with that one.

"I'm probably not gonna get my button. I don't know yet, but I have time to think about it." He kept his tone low. "All the money I've saved…Gazebo is still empty. Colleoni's gonna help me buy it. He'll be a silent partner, but it'll be legit." Jasper drew in a large breath. "A lot of things are gonna change." He squeezed my bicep excitedly.

I shook my head laughing, but I still hated that he was lying to me. It was unnecessary, and I needed him to be truthful...at the very fucking least...with me. I don't know. I felt a certain way about him lying. Then again, I'd lied about Bella. "_You…_you told Colleoni about that shit...about Alice and Riley…about the abortion?"

Jasper had a brow quirked, but he didn't confirm or deny my claim.

"Sneaky," I said. "You make a few moves like that…You being in or out the game, doesn't matter. Some dudes might look at you differently."

"And Aldo?" He kept his tone hushed.

"That was different," I defended.

"How so? Personal gain is personal gain, Ed." That was as good as a confession, and I accepted that.

"Yeah...true." I nodded, staring at him. "No, fuck that. I made a strategic move to better my own business. You—"

"I was sneaky," he admitted. "It had nothing to do with business, but I wanted him gone. I hated that motherfucker. And I can't do what you do. I did what I had to. Now...Alice is mine." Jasper smiled. "Riley won't be interfering anymore. He was worse than CJ, man."

I rolled my eyes. "Like you don't_ insert yourself_ whenever Bella and I have a problem? You're the first one she cries to whenever_ I_ fuck up." I exaggerated; what I'd started to say wasn't necessarily true. "She runs her mouth to Alice, and then Alice cries to you—telling you how_ horrible_ I am." I barked out a laugh. "Bella bitches to Alice that I come home late or something, and by the time it gets to you, you're ova there thinkin' I beat her and made her scrub my boots."

"That's my sister," he laughed, only to compose himself quickly. "If Jake was around to poke his nose where it didn't belong...How would you feel? Someone she used'ta fuck?"

At the mention of that fuck's name, I stopped laughing as well, and I understood to a certain degree. I've never faulted Jasper for looking out for Bella either. "It's like a game of chess..." I mused, shaking my head of those thoughts.

Though, something _else_ did _not_ sit right with me, and I continued to keep my voice below a whisper. "After all the garbage you used to talk—how Alice was loose, had been around the 'hood, how she was annoying and childish...I knew youse were together, but marriage? You and Alice?"

Truth be told, and to any onlookers, there was more of a love match between Alice and Riley than Alice and Jasper. But maybe they've grown closer as of late? Riley's gone now. There's no point on dwelling or giving a fuck, but even I knew the shit between Alice and Riley wasn't some frivolous affair, nor did Riley_ force_ Alice to do anything...

They loved each other—familiar or not—and it was plain as day. They did what they did, and found themselves in a situation. When shit hit the fan, Alice warned Riley, not caring of Jasper's possible involvement, how Riley might go after Jazz.

However, Alice kept Jasper informed, too . . . wasn't as sneaky as Jazz in the least.

Whether I agreed with his reasoning or not, it was done.

But if Colleoni is forcing Jasper to propose...? Or, is my friend looking for the easiest road to success?

_As long as he's happy... _I thought.

Jasper laughed. "Ed, man, I've been crazy about her for years." He became serious. "Years, Edward. She was Bella's little friend. She was always around. Next thing I know, I'm in love with her...but she comes over crying because of that shit with Riley." He furrowed his brow. "That was a while ago...when she was pregnant and didn't know what to do." His eyes met mine, and he smiled. "I was ready to...Even back then, I was ready to step up to the plate. Then she got rid of it, and she was still a kid . . . and I _wanted_ to hate her." He munched on his lower lip. "I could never hate her, but the situation was fucked."

I nodded. "You never told me all of that."

"I used to talk shit because...I don't know why. It was easier than admitting my feelings when she was with this, this, or that one." He frowned. "I was such a pussy, always afraid to make a move...Then, CJ was putting all this pressure on me, which had me shook, still scared." Jasper rocked back on his heels, embarrassed. "But I do love her. Maybe I'm not affectionate in public—"

"I believe you." I put my hand up to stop him.

"Nah, seriously." He nudged my shoulder. "The more I love her, the crazier she makes me…Colleoni didn't put me up to it. I plan to ask. I just hope she accepts."

"Good luck…although I doubt you need it. I bet she says yes." I smiled.

"Youse better beat us down the aisle. The baby's almost here, you know? Bella's having the baby, you guys ain't married. It really doesn't look right—"

"We _are_ getting married. That's a definite. No worries there," I explained. "Bella wants us to do the christening first. Then…we'll plan big or small, whatever she wants." I shrugged. "I'm set for the rest of my life."

"Good," Jasper said.


	108. Chapter 108

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter 108**

"Edward."

My head whipped to my godfather and Esme. "Hey," I said, truly surprised they'd come at this hour.

They were steadily walking toward us. "Are we too late?" Esme beamed.

I smiled, leaning to kiss her cheek. "No. We have a while to go."

Colleoni pulled me in for a tight hug. "You OK, kid?"

I puffed my cheeks as I left the embrace. "Now...Getting us here was the hard part."

He patted my back. "The day you were born, your father almost gave himself a heart attack."

Esme hit her husband's chest playfully. "You remember? Ed was such a nervous wreck," she laughed. "He called the house screaming, looking for Carlisle."

"He was excited." Colleoni shrugged. "Ed was the happiest I'd ever seen him. When you came out, and it was a boy..." he whistled. "He was proud. He showed you off to everyone, kissed _all_ the nurses." He rolled his eyes, smiling even wider. "Lizzie, your mom—"

"We should say hello to Isabella." Esme cut him off; her face had fallen.

"_Aspetta._ I'm tellin' a story." My godfather gestured to me.

Esme glared at him before disappearing into Bella's room.

I watched her go, giving Bella a small wave, and I wanted to follow. Bella's skin tone was normal. She didn't look to be in any pain at the moment, but she looked uneasy? When I took a step toward her, Colleoni placed his arm over my shoulder to usher me away. "Your mother was in labor for hours...but she was a real trooper." He nodded. "The smile—the joy on her face after you were born—_madonn'._ It was a sight."

I exchanged a glance with Jasper, a part of me wondering why we needed to take this trip down memory lane. Jazz just stood there, listening too.

"Did you call her?" Colleoni asked.

"Who?" I quirked a brow.

"Your mother." He stared at me.

"Oh..." I chuckled, racking my brain for an excuse as to why I hadn't—something that would sound better than the truth, admitting that Elizabeth just doesn't give a fuck. "Everything just...happened so fast. I haven't had the chance. I'll call later." Meanwhile, my mother doesn't even know we're expecting. She doesn't even know I'm in Brooklyn, but she knows I'm stateside. Just in case she worried, I called to let her know that I was back, was honorably discharged. We didn't talk for too long.

Like Colleoni said, he was telling _a story_.

Maybe she _was_ happy the day I was born.

I have no idea, and I wished I_ could_ give Elizabeth more credit.

I wished she _would_ care.

It was best I didn't dwell on that shit either.

Like, if Bella's mother couldn't be here, I wished my mother was the type to—

I pushed all of those thoughts out of my head.

Already nervous yet excited, I didn't want to spoil anything by getting sentimental about...my parents, Bella's parents, those who couldn't be here.

"I'm surprised she's not here," my godfather sighed. "Call her sooner rather than later." He squeezed my shoulder.

I smiled to be polite. "Right."

He reached into his jacket, and then he tried to slip me an envelope. He wasn't very discreet. "A baby gift."

I put my hand up to protest.

"It's for Isabella and the baby." He slapped it into my palm. "Take it. Don't insult me."

"Thank you," I said, placing it in my back pocket. Thankfully, I was wearing baggy jeans, or else it wouldn't fit. "I appreciate it."

He palmed my cheeks, smiling, surprising the fuck outta me when he kissed my lips. "You're such a good kid. I wish Ed was here." His jovial face turned somber. "Being a grandpa is a trip, lemme tell ya...But, being a first time father," he jerked his head, "that's—that's some shit," he laughed again, hugging me to his side once more.

"Yeah," I agreed and my stomach knotted up with excitement.

"You'll be a great dad. Don't worry."

"Thank you for being here, coming through." I truly appreciated that, too.

It's just...talking about my parents...Maybe I never had the best relationship with Elizabeth, but I knew my father. He raised me, tucked me in at night, checked the closet for monsters, and he made sure I was taken care of—squared away if he couldn't be with me. I knew who he was and what he was about, and _how much_ he loved me.

I missed him terribly, and I really hated to be reminded of his absence. Especially at this time. "I mean, really, thank you," I said, hoping he believed me, that I was genuine. If Dad couldn't be here, I was happy that my godfather was.

He knit his brows together. "Don't thank me—not for this, not for being where I should be," he whispered. "I'm your godfather." His voice was emotional, which surprised me.

His sincerity shocked me, and I didn't know what to say—stunned to silence. I also didn't trust my voice, feeling that lump in my throat.

"Edward?" Esme placed her hand on my shoulder.

I turned to her.

"Isabella's asking for you. She called for the nurse—"

"What? Why?" I asked, watching Bella's nurse walk into her room.

"Excuse me." I sprinted the few steps, followed the nurse, and I was quick to grab Bella's hand. "Hey." I kissed her palm. "What's going on?"

"I want the epidural." Sweat had popped on her forehead, and I saw what I couldn't from the hall. "They're getting even stronger." Her face scrunched, and she was holding her breath.

"Breathe, Bella." I rubbed her back, watching her take in a lungful of air. "Whatever you need, baby, we'll make sure you get it." I pushed her bangs back, looking to the nurse who read that monitor, was checking out the baby's heartbeat.

"Hopefully, after you get the epidural, you can nap." Alice smiled, holding Bella's other hand.

Bella nodded, her eyes pleading, like she was hoping that'd be possible.

My heart ached, knowing she was in pain, knowing she was doing her best to mask it and yet failing. "Where's this doctor? Should I go find him?" I asked, trying to remember the nurse's name. "Angela, whatta we doin' hea?"

"Please relax, sir," Angela told me, turning to give Bella a reassuring smile. "Isabella, Dr. Patel is with another patient. He's right down the hall, so there's no need to get worked up." She made eye contact with me before beaming down to Bella again. "I'd like to see how far you've progressed." She touched Bella's foot. "I'll just be taking a look."

"She wants the epi-epa, that shot." I felt stupid, out of my depth of knowledge, and like I should have read a fucking book about this. "Epadura." I snapped my fingers.

"Epidural," Alice whispered.

Angela nodded, her gaze fixated on Bella. "Let's see how you're doing first. Okay? Can you place your feet in the stirrups for me?"

While Alice and I helped Bella, the nurse took a part of the bed away. "I'm just going to take a peek." The nurse put on a pair of gloves. "Then, we'll call the anesthesiologist." She lifted the blanket.

I wanted to take a look, too, but Bella turned to me. Her contraction was over. She was breathing easier, but she still didn't look right.

"I'm sorry, baby." I placed my lips to her forehead. "I was—I'm still nervous and excited." My uneasy smile matched hers. She managed to grin for me. "I'm sorry. I love you so much...I love you." I needed her to know that; my stomach doing backflips. "Just hold on a little while longer. We'll get the doctor, and you'll get the shot..." I nodded. "Right? The pain'll go away, and we'll take a nap together...right?"

"Yeah." Her voice cracked as she placed her hand on my cheek. "I love you, too." Bella wasn't crying, and I knew she was holding it together for me.

That made me feel even worse. "I'm sorry. Just...scream at me. I did this. I...you know." I blew out my own shaky breath. Memories of that night flooded my mind, the night we'd made a baby, the night my life changed forever. I'd never seen anything as beautiful when I saw Bella at the club. Even if she was drunk and shouting at Jasper, she was gorgeous, perfect. I wanted her then, and I love the fuck outta her now. I _need_ her now. "You in that tight fuckin' dress."

The side of her mouth pulled up. "I went after you. Remember?" She winced, briefly glancing down to Angela. "Don't apologize. I'm—"

"Okay, folks." The nurse nodded, looking to Alice. "Can you go wait outside?" Her gaze flipped back to us. "I'll run and get the doctor." She zoomed out of the room before Alice had even left the chair.

"What's going on?" I shouted.

Bella huffed, trying to sit up a little more. "I don't know. I feel—I don't know." She grimaced.

"What's it feel like?" Alice asked.

"It-it hurts." Another contraction tore through her and she let out a shriek.

"Fuck!" Alice and I exclaimed in unison.

I sat next to her. "Breathe, baby. Breathe through it."

Bella's face was contorted, red, and her whole body stiffened. "I feel like-like I need to push…now." She gritted her teeth.

"Oh, no." Alice fussed over her, had started crying. "B, don't—not 'til the doctor comes and says you can."

"I know." Bella bit out, like she was trying to hold it back.

"You got it, baby. Just ride it out." Trying my best to keep my voice soft, I looked to Alice. "The doc'll be here soon," I crooned, nuzzling my nose to Bella's cheek. My eyes never left her friend, though, wondering what her problem was. Alice was shaking, about to lose her shit. "Alice—"

"Bella, don't push. You can't push!" Alice pulled her own hair.

"Yo..." I snapped my fingers at her. "Relax or take that shit out to the hall."

It happened so fast.

It all went to hell in a matter of fucking seconds.

"You don't understand." Alice rushed out.

"Get out!" I wanted her out of here.

Alice choked on a sob, losing whatever composure she had left. "The baby could die!"

"Oh God," Bella whimpered. "Something's wrong. Edward, something's wrong!" She clawed at me, fucking panicking, sheer terror taking over. "Hail Mary full of grace. The Lord is with..." She continued to pray through broken sobs, about to break my hand.

"Go!" I looked to Alice and pointed to the door, when I really wanted to throw her out, out a fucking window. "Now!"

"I'll get the doctor!" she shouted, running out of the room.

Bella had her eyes closed, still praying and crying.

"Baby, look at me." I used a tissue to wipe her tears. "Nothing's wrong."

"You-you don't know that." She shook her head.

"And Alice does...?" I asked, my heart hammering away, hoping I was correct. "The doctor's coming right in." I crashed my mouth to hers, kissing her deep despite her cries.

Bella hummed, a cry sounding from her throat, and then her eyes locked to mine. "What if I die? My mother died when I was born—"

"That's not going to happen." I gathered her into my arms. "Don't be silly. Don't say shit like that." My vision became blurry, and I blinked the tears away. "That's not going to happen."

"I-I'd wished to die for so long. The whole time I was with Jake, I wanted—"

I shook my head. "Don't—"

"What if God gave me this happiness, being with you because _this_ is my time?" She started to hyperventilate. "I don't wanna die anymore. I don't. You saved me. You...I love you, Edward."

"Stop," I pleaded. "Don't say goodbye to me. That's bullshit."

"But you hafta know," she sobbed. "Just in case. I could bleed out like my mom, and there's so much I wanna tell you. You have to know—"

"Tell me later. Tell me tomorrow, or next week." I nodded, cutting her off. "You're going to be fine. Just-just breathe. Just...just try to calm down. I know you're hurting. I know it hurts, baby." My lips lingered on hers again. "I know you're scared, but everything's going to be fine. We're gonna get the shot. You're gonna pop him out. He's going to be perfect...just like you." I felt my face crumble. "You're—you can't think you're going to die because you can't leave me. Remember? I'll follow right after—"

"No," she whispered, searching my eyes. "If..." she gulped "—you can't."

"Christ!" The seconds that slowly ticked by felt like hours. "Where is this fuckin' doctor?" Now, I thought I'd truly explode. "You're not dyin', all right?" I all but screamed.

When the door opened, I felt relief for a short moment.

But it was only Jasper. He poked his head into the room. "Alice said—" He looked to Bella and then to me. "What the fuck is goin' on?"

"Where's the doctor?" I asked him.

He jerked his thumb. "He's comin'. I just—" Jasper stared at his sister. "Bella-Boo, what's—"

I looked back to Bella. She was rubbing her stomach and mumbling.

Angry, I gritted my teeth. "Tell her she's not gonna die!"

Jasper cracked a grin, lifting Bella's chin. "With how many angels you got up there? Never fuckin' happen." He shook his head. "Gram would kick God's ass herself."

Bella nodded, still in agony, and I knew her heart was breaking. I also knew she wanted to believe Jasper's words. Fuck, I did. Did I think Bella was going to die? No. The thought never crossed my mind until she said it. Bella fucking better not. She won't. She's just scared, thinking about her mother . . .

"Get those fuckin' thoughts out your head." I poked her temple.

"Ed..." Jazz hit my bicep.

I ignored him. "Bella."

She nodded to agree with me. "I know...I, um—"

"You're scared. I'm scared, too." I kissed her lips, her nose, her lips again, her forehead. "You're not going anywhere. You hear me? You're gonna toughen up. Bella, you've been through worse."

That caught her attention, a flicker of something flashed through her gaze.

"I _know_ you have..." I whispered. "You're stronger than this...to say goodbye, to give up. Fuck that." A chuckle escaped me. "It hurts, you're scared, but you're going to get through it."

Tears still stained her cheeks, but she'd stopped sobbing. "Alice freaked out, and..." She looked to the ceiling. "I just..."

"Tell me tomorrow," I said.

Bella turned to stare at me, but she didn't say anything.

Jasper massaged her shoulder. "If there was something wrong, really wrong, this room would filled with doctors and shit. You're fine." His logic was logical, and I hadn't thought of that. "Does_ everything_ have to be dramatic with you two? Life or death...? Jesus Christ."

Even so, I grabbed the nurses' call button and pushed that shit ten times in quick succession.

"There was some broad just screamin' down the hall." He shrugged. "You're not screamin'."

"Yeah." Bella was calming down, taking slow, deep breaths. "You're right. I've waited for this day, thinking it'd never come...so anxious to meet him." She palmed her stomach. "I love him already, and I...I'm scared I..."

Jasper chuckled. "Because _it is_ scary. Especially if you think about the worst possible outcome. But it's also exciting...Bella-Boo, I bet this turns out to be the best day..._the best day_ of your life, and you're gonna have many more."

Bella smiled at me.

Of course, I smiled back, but I was a little jealous of Jasper. I'm supposed to be Bella's rock. I'm supposed to help her relax. My words were supposed to encourage her.

Pissed, fucking scared outta my mind, jealous, nervous—you name it, I fucking felt it.

And amongst all those feelings, I had hope and excitement. I hoped for the best, hoping we're just a couple of drama queens.

Knowing it was Alice and her bullshit that made us both panic.

_Fucking Alice. _

_I wanna see how calm Jasper is the day she goes into labor when I call in a bomb threat . . ._

I shook my head of the thought, throwing a smile at my friend, too.

If my emotions were everywhere, I couldn't imagine what Bella must be feeling . . . regardless of Jasper's influence.

"I'm sorry I said that." She squeezed my hand. "I just keep thinking about my mom. It's what I-I fear the most." Her lip quivered, and the monitor started going apeshit again, which indicated another contraction. "Fuck me, this hurts!"

"Just breathe, baby." I closed my eyes, holding her close, and then I looked to Jasper again. "Go get that nurse—" I shut up as soon as the door opened, my heart jumping up into my throat when the doctor arrived.


	109. Chapter 109

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 109**

That fucking quack told us it'd be hours, but Bella had gone from three centimeters dilated to nine within a few hour's time. We had a very slow start and now . . . boom!

They said something about it being too fast, fussing over Bella, and the nurse started an IV to give her meds—something to slow it all down. They even tilted Bella's bed, making it so her feet rose above her head, which was supposed to help...Gravity was supposed to thwart our son's escape from the womb.

None of that mattered.

He wanted out.

This_ was_ it.

We didn't even have time to panic again.

Jasper was allowed to stay as long as he kept out of the way.

Bella didn't start praying; she didn't utter a word.

There was no time for anything.

Nothing.

Sitting behind Bella, as instructed, I held her knees up as best I could. My lips were pressed to her cheek while she pushed, and pushed, and fucking pushed. My brain kept telling me to say something—to tell Bella something encouraging, but I couldn't find my voice.

I didn't trust my voice.

"Okay…almost, Isabella. You're doing great." Angela, the nurse, smiled down to her.

"Oh…" Bella cried, huffing and puffing. "I can't—I-I can't." She collapsed back against me, limp. "I need a minute."

"You can. You can do this. You're almost there." Angela touched Bella's face, her eyes landing on me as she nodded, like that was my cue.

I tried to catch my breath. "Bella, you _can_ do this."

"I need a break. Just a few minutes," she cried.

Angela shook her head at me, like that wasn't an option.

"No...come on." I pushed her to sit up a bit. "You can rest after."

"It's too much. It hurts—" She choked on a sob.

"He's got a lot of hair." The doctor smiled. "Isabella, you have to push, and you can. Do you understand?" The way he glanced at the nurse and then back to us made me even more nervous.

I looked to Jasper, and he just stood there.

With my heart in my throat, I leaned over to meet Bella's gaze. She was in agony, her face crumpled as she sobbed, and she actually looked years younger than she was, but still beautiful. "I wish my mom was here," she cried.

"I'm here for you, baby." I hugged her tight, whispering, "I love you...You can do this. Just one more, a big one, and then that's it. It'll be over."

"Okay, but..." Her breaths were shaky as she looked to the doctor. "I feel..."

"On the count of three, I need a big one—the _best_ you can." He disappeared behind the blanket again. "Every second and every minute counts now. Your baby is doing fine, at the moment. Isabella, if you don't push—"

"I'll try—I'll push," she blurted.

"—we'll have to do an emergency c-section." The doctor still finished his thought.

"Is...is that safer?" Bella rasped. "He feels like he's stuck. He's—"

"He's a big boy, yes, but you're doing well." He worked under the drape; I saw him moving but not what he was doing. "We can have him out in five minutes."

"Hey." I placed my finger under her chin, turning her back to me. "Five minutes. I bet it's even less than that. One good push, and he'll slide right out."

She sniffled, gulping, and with my support, we sat up a bit more.

"Get ready to bear down..." Doc instructed.

"Look at me." I turned her chin again. "We can do this...together, remember? Deep breath."

We both sucked as much air into our lungs as we could.

"Okay, it's time!" the doctor shouted. "One, two, three…push, Isabella."

With our eyes locked, Bella started to push, letting out a few strangled cries.

I placed my lips to hers, and she sobbed into my mouth, collapsing into me when she'd stopped pushing, but then…

We heard another cry.

"There we go!" the doctor shouted. "Dad, would you like to cut the cord?"

As much as I wanted to, I declined, wanting to stay by Bella's side.

"Go," Bella whispered, weak against me, frighteningly so.

"No." I kissed her cheek. "I'm fine here." My brow furrowed, focusing on Bella. There was all this happiness in the room suddenly. But... "Hey." I nudged her, making her open her eyes. "We did it."

"Uncle?" He looked to Jasper. "Would you like to cut the cord?"

He shook his head no very fast.

"We did it." Bella exhaled, a lazy smile on her lips.

"Talk to me," I said.

She held up a finger.

"What's wrong with her?" I asked, looking to the doctor.

"Give her a few minutes." Angela patted Bella's bicep. "Her vitals are great, minimal blood loss. You did fantastic, Isabella. He's a big boy."

Bella let out a giggle. "We ate enough pizza." She opened her eyes to stare at me.

I placed a loud smooch in her neck. "You're okay."

"Almost." It was half grumbled, nearly a sob. "Where is he?" Bella only perked up by the prospect of seeing the baby. "I wanna see..." She tried to peek over the drape, but then she fell back against my chest again to giggle. "You hear him?"

"Yeah..." Our son was screaming; I smiled at Jasper, who stood in the corner crying into his palms. His shoulders shook, and I didn't understand it.

Besides that, there was a flurry of activity as they brought our son over to a nearby counter. Another doctor, a pediatrician, was here, too. But my eyes stayed on Bella. She was still crying and smiling—and now reaching—but she honestly looked half out of it, probably from the pain.

"Why aren't they giving him to me?" she asked, staring expectant.

"They just have to clean him up a bit." Her doctor laughed a loud one. "We're not done with you yet, Mommy." He winked.

I smiled wide, my gaze whipping back and forth. Our son had some set of pipes, I can tell ya that. He continued to scream his ass off. Everyone in the room had a smile on, even Bella...Well, Jasper was still carrying on. "You all right, Jazz?" I asked.

He tried to compose himself, nodding. "I was so-so scared." Jasper grasped Bella's hand. "I saw the blood, and it looked like you were being torn in half..." He gaped at her like a fish.

"It felt like it," Bella said. "I'm okay. I promise."

Jasper cried through his nose. "I'm so happy."

"Go tell Alice and them..." Bella whispered. "I'm fine."

Jasper agreed and then covered his eyes as he passed behind the doctor. Then he was kicked out when he tried to take pictures of the baby. He was in the way.

Relieved, I just chuckled. "You did it!" I hugged her tightly against me.

Bella laughed through her tears, and she was weak, sweaty, but still so beautiful.

And I stared for a good few moments, storing the picture away for memory, never wanting to forget…how she looked.

"I love you." I peppered her cheek and neck with kisses.

"I love you, too."

"He's out! You did it!" I cheered.

"We did it." She swallowed her cry, her hand shaky as it landed on top of mine.

"You did," I sighed, squeezing her hand to keep it steady, like she'd done for me earlier. "You were amazing, baby. _Amazing_."

Bella kept staring to where Angela was. "I wanna see him."

When I left the bed to see what was up, I saw a lot more than I wanted to. The doctor had just pulled this...bloody blob from Bella. "What, um..." I swallowed my nerves, staring as I also peeped Bella's goods, which made me grimace. My favorite place in the whole world, and it was . . .

"What's wrong?" she asked me.

"Everything looks great!" I gave Bella a thumbs up.

"Don't worry. It goes back to normal," the doctor sighed, discarding the red blob into a large plastic container. "That was the placenta."

"Oh..." I nodded, looking back over to our son. His doctor was checking his vitals, and I saw a teeny foot in the air. He was kicking _and_ screaming.

"There's no tearing...and I'm surprised." The doctor was still cleaning Bella up. "You truly did fantastic. For a boy his size to come out of you naturally, with your small stature...and there was no tearing." He seemed proud of her. "It was touch and go, but you pulled through." He smiled up to her.

Bella hummed, acknowledging him.

"This is as great as it gets...no complications. He came fast, but that happens."

I appreciated his words. "I knew she could do it. She's a champ."

Bella didn't care. She was impatient now, and our son had only come out a few minutes prior. But it seemed like time had slowed down again.

"We're all done..." He stood from his stool. "She did great."

"Enough. You sound like Tony the Tiger." Bella glared at Dr. Patel. "I thought I was going to die because you were too busy." She had fight in her voice now. "If you had all those worries, you should have done the c-section right away."

"Isabella, if I thought—"

"No," she answered. "It was torturous when it didn't have to be. It was risky when it didn't have to be. It's over, and I'm done talking to you. I just want my baby!" Bella ranted, and I had no idea where that strength came from.

"Damn," I whispered.

"Congratulations." The doctor bowed his head to her. "I'll come by a little later to check on you."

"Thank you," I told him.

Angela smiled wide as she cradled our baby close. "Here he is..."

Bella beamed when he was finally in her arms.

And I nearly bumped into the nurse in my haste to get to Bella. "Lemme see."

Bella cried...hysterically, although she called them tears of joy. "Hi," she whispered to him, and he wasn't screaming anymore. "I only yelled 'cause I was scared...and mad." I didn't know if she spoke to me or our son. "I really didn't know if I could do it."

"But you did it," I said.

"But I didn't know." Her lip quivered, and she held his tiny hand. "Everyone was telling me to push, and I thought I was going to pass out. Literally, I _didn't know_ if I could do it." Bella snorted. "I'm a wimp. Women have babies every day—"

"No." Now Angela cut her off. "Every woman and every experience is different. You handled everything very well. Him, on the other hand..." She stared at me.

"I did all right," I defended, looking to Bella. "And now I know loads of stuff for next time." I kissed her cheek and then our son's forehead.

"Of course." Angela touched my shoulder before she turned to walk away.

"Of course." Bella mimicked her and stuck her tongue out, but she couldn't stop smiling. Then she looked down to the baby. "She just flirted with Daddy and Daddy's trying to pretend it didn't happen."

I widened my arms. "Bella..."

"I was half-kidding." She grinned at me. "Did you say 'next time'?"

I kissed her temple, gazing down to our son. "I did." He was beautiful with a head full of dark hair, Bella's hair. His eyes were closed, and his whole body was a pinkish hue.

"Yeah...everything was so worth...getting him in the end." She was weepy again, cradling him close. "I love you...we have a son."

"He's gorgeous. Looks like you," I said, massaging her neck gently.

Bella nodded and sniffled. "He's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. He's a nice size, too." Her head whipped. "How much does he weigh?"

Angela had only gone to the door to give us the illusion of privacy. "We haven't taken his measurements yet. We'll do that in the nursery, but I'd guess he's about eight or so pounds," she explained. "Let Daddy say hi, and then we'll take him."

"Oh..." I was surprised. "You'll bring him back, though, right?"

Bella held him tighter. "Edward, go with him...just to watch. I don't want Little Eddie to be alone," she crooned down to him.

"Eddie?" I asked.

"Yeah, this is Eddie." She was absolutely giddy, the happiest I'd ever seen her. "He looks like an Eddie. Don't you think?"

My lip quivered, feeling tears prick my eyes for some reason. Her wanting to name the baby after me...It just got me weepy; meanwhile, I was elated, ecstatic, the happiest I'd ever been. "Yeah..." I swallowed my cry. "He-he looks like an Eddie."

Bella sighed. "I love you." She kissed his forehead, and I knew she didn't want to let go. "You hold him."

I shook my head before I got back into the bed. "I wanna hold youse both."

I wrapped my arms around them . . .

My family.


	110. Chapter 110

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter 110**

Jasper had been correct when he said things were changing.

Bella and I had a son—we had a kid.

Edward Masino III and his mother were discharged from the hospital two days after he was born. Bella and I were so happy, too, but coming home was a trip. The both of us were still excited and nervous, and we wondered if we were doing the right things.

We'd constantly second-guess ourselves with everything.

Well, Bella knew what she was doing—a natural, like I knew she'd be, and I followed her lead—although she still doubted herself half the time.

The first week he was home, we actually argued over who could feed him. We'd both wake up at all hours of the night, anxious to do whatever needed to be done.

Jasper can poke fun at me all he wants. He's just as whipped by his nephew as I am.

I mean, if someone told me last year that I'd be a father now…

I would have laughed at them.

Never having given the daddy track any thought, I was even surprised by how much of a doting father I became.

As the weeks passed, though, we were able to get Li'l Eddie on a schedule. Bella knows it like the back of her hand, while I still have to glance at the large paper on the fridge.

Parenting an infant isn't routine.

There's no way we could stay totally on that schedule.

My little dude is unpredictable, but we're as close to having a schedule as we'll get, I think.

A few weeks ago, I went back to work after spending two weeks at home. I'm still who I am. I still do what I do. Nothing has changed on that front. The guys and I just don't have a captain, so we've been kicking up to Colleoni directly. My godfather didn't approach me about stepping up or anything, much to my dismay. I have no idea why my godfather is drawing that process out. He hasn't brought it up, and I haven't asked. Maybe he's talking to someone else about it? Who knows?

It's been really quiet lately. We do what we do, and then I have the pizzeria.

Even if it took them three weeks to figure it out, the F.B.I. did come to Sal's inquiring about Riley; it was the last place he'd visited before he disappeared. I told them he came in for a Coke and a slice and then he left. With my permission, they poked around, found nothing amiss, and then they were quick to leave.

If they knew my status, or who I was within the organization, I had no idea.

They treated me like a soda jerk, some kid employee. Once they saw the deed, they knew I owned the joint, but otherwise didn't say a thing. They were nonchalant, really nice, and it didn't look like they gave a fuck.

It's been six, almost seven weeks, and I haven't heard anything. From authorities, anyway. Like I knew she would, Alice filled Bella in. She told Bella everything, which led to _Bella_ asking me if I'd seen Riley...every day...until I finally told her to stop asking. She got the hint, and she knew better than to tell Alice a damn thing.

"Edward?" Bella walked into the living room.

"Shhh." Li'l man was asleep on my chest—wrapped like a burrito in his swaddle-thing, and his legs were curled, so his butt had a pop.

"Oh!" She turned in a circle to grab her phone. Bella smiled widely down to us, lifting her cell. "You look even sexier…holding him." She started to snap pics of us. "It should be illegal for you to be this sexy...strike a pose," she whispered.

I stuck out my tongue and my hand hovered over Eddie's butt, as if I were about to grab it.

Bella giggled, so fucking happy, she lit up the room.

I grinned, my eyes peeping the notebook wedged under her arm. "What's that?"

"Finalizing the guest list…for the christening. I've been trying to get it back to Esme for two days now," she sighed, her eyes widening. "And it's_ in _three days. Everyone who's coming—who we sent invites to—have already R.S.V.P.'d. I have messages on the house phone, my cell phone, and I even got emails to answer…" she giggled. "I feel popular this week."

"You're always popular in this house." I leaned, trying not to jostle Ed, as I tried to get those lips.

Bella hummed when our mouths met. "I love you both so much." She rested her head against my shoulder, gazing down to our son. "I'm…happy, Edward. Happier than I've ever been my whole life. Thank you." She got weepy.

"Oh, Bella-Boo." I squeezed her thigh, soothing her . . . _or_ her hormones. "Me too, baby. You guys are the perfect package, and_ I_ should be thanking _you_."

"S-stop being sweet." She waved at her watery eyes, sucking back a little sob.

I chuckled. "Tell me more." I nodded to the notebook, wanting to get her mind off the tears.

She wiped her eyes, calming down. "I'm trying to get all the info to Esme, narrow it all down." She made a face and then sniffled. "Oh, you also have to call your friend about the liquor."

My godfather surprised the hell out of me when he said he'd pay for the party this Sunday. It's going to be a big one because he's throwing it, and he can't dis his people—people I don't know personally who will be in attendance.

I'm cool with it, as I'll embrace any opportunity to celebrate my son. And those people might have known my father, too. Colleoni rented a party hall for the event. There's even going to be a deejay, buffet-style dinner, but I needed to do something. Knowing my buddy Mario has a liquor hookup, I said I'd take care of the open bar.

I'm just surprised at Colleoni, for going all out like that.

"I was wondering," she whispered, "about your mom? She called after Eddie was born, and you were rude to her." Bella stared at me with inquisitive eyes, waiting for me to elaborate.

I waved a hand, not caring. "If you sent her an invite…whatever. It's cool, but I doubt she'll come."

When Elizabeth called, I was shocked since I had no idea how she got my number, knew I was back in Brooklyn—that I'd had a kid. She knew everything and then she bitched me out for not informing her...myself. I wondered why she suddenly gave a fuck, why she needed me to tell her. The informant she has did a decent job. Before I could ask how she knew, she said I was just like my father. She can never talk to me, or I don't let her talk, whichever. Then she promptly hung up.

Bella was still staring at me.

"What's up...?" I raised a brow.

"She said no at first when she R.S.V.P.'d, but…then I told her we'd pay for the plane. She'd said she'd love to come, but she didn't have airfare."

"Oh…" I nodded. "That means you _actually_ spoke to her…my mother? Did you get her number from my phone? Call her to begin with?"

"No, she called by herself after Eddie was born. I only just snooped through your contacts last week." Bella munched on her bottom lip.

"Snooped," I repeated, not pleased at all.

"She said she loves you and misses you. She wants to see you and meet her grandson." Bella sounded wistful while that didn't sound like Elizabeth at all.

"What?" I asked. "She said that crap?"

"It's not crap," Bella disagreed. "Plus, she's his _only_ grandma. None of us have any grandparents, or parents, really. Mr. Colleoni and Esme are wonderful, but they're not blood. I know you say blood doesn't make people family, but still. If she's willing to come out here, I think we should help get her here. She's your mom."

I felt indifferent about it. "Whatever makes you happy."

"Not me, Edward. _You_. The christening is in three days. I'm just trying to get it all settled, guest lists, too." She leered at me again, waiting for an answer, and then she started to hum the Jeopardy theme song.

I laughed. "Do it…but get her a first class ticket."

"Good…I already used your Visa to buy her ticket. I made the arrangements yesterday, and she'll be here tomorrow." Bella smiled. "Coach is fine. You just wanna show off . . . unless you care that much about the legroom she'll have . . . or won't have."

"Whatever's clever." Honestly, I didn't see any harm in Elizabeth coming to New York. "That was ballsy, going behind my back like that—"

Her eyes widened. "But—"

"I know," I whispered. "You're lookin' out for me, want li'l man to meet her. It's cool. Just…don't keep me in the dark next time." I didn't really care. But next time, it might be whatever-the-fuck and not something as simple. "And don't be disappointed when…She's not some cookie-making mom, doting, you know? She'll smile and be pleasing, but otherwise keep to herself." I didn't know how to accurately describe my mother. "She's a wino." I thought that sounded better than alcoholic. "If she sounded upbeat when youse spoke, I mean, she might be on the wagon and on her meds again." I never know which version of Elizabeth I'll be faced with.

"She sounded very happy." Bella kissed my cheek. "She was nice and polite, and she didn't slur her words or anything. I think it's time you started to have a relationship with her. I don't know. I don't wanna push, but…she's alive, willing to come and visit. You could try…if _she_ does?"

"You're right," I agreed. "But don't think she's gonna be..." I didn't want Bella getting her hopes up, thinking Elizabeth might be the mother she's never had, or be like her grams where Eddie is concerned.

Regardless of the few memories I had, before I'd gone to live with her, I thought she was dead. Then I spent years wishing and praying she'd be...a mother, a parent, someone she's not capable of being. And she used to talk all this shit about my father, how he was this or that. Shit no kid should hear. I never believed her since I knew my father.

"Tell me," she whispered.

It took me a minute to think out my words. "When I lived with her, even at fourteen, I was the adult and she was the kid. I had to take care of her, and nothing was ever good enough. I don't know how she...got from day-to-day before I'd moved in with her. No matter what state she's in...deep down, she's a giant, black hole of despair." I shrugged. "I lasted three years. Graduated high school, got her to sign my papers so I could enlist at seventeen. I was outta there . . . and I saw her once between deployments, and she was doing all right. There's no real beef, I guess...just a shitload of animosity."

Truth be told, I didn't feel badly or happily about her visit. Bella's hormones are a little outta whack still. Her doctor said everything should get back to normal after her first real period, but that hasn't happened yet . . . something about her breastfeeding. Either way, I definitely didn't want her crying about this—if she'd cry at all.

I played it safe by agreeing. We've been happy, relaxed for the most part.

Her emotions are her emotions, and I didn't wanna fuck with them by upsetting her.

"If she's not on her meds, she's on the first flight back to Washington after the christening," I said. "I'm not getting her here just so she can party on the East Coast."

Bella made this face. "Esme's...a functioning alcoholic. No one talks about it, but that doesn't mean it's not true. She's okay, nice, and she's active. She's practically planned the entire party for Sunday."

I smirked at Miss Optimistic. "Elizabeth...she's not like Esme."

"Alice says sometimes Esme can be real mean, yell and whack her one while she's schnocked. Was Elizabeth like that? Mean to you?"

"Alice exaggerates," I said. "But, no...not really. The only person Elizabeth is content to hurt is herself. She used to...talk badly about my father. That used to sting...I don't know why Esme drinks, but they're not the same."

Bella shook her head. "Regardless, Elizabeth didn't sound like anything you've described. Maybe she is better?"

"Maybe..." I didn't know what to say.

"Anyway, we'll get her here, and your queen-sized bed that's still at Jasper's will fit in the extra bedroom—"

"She's staying here?" All of this was too comical. "Here?"

"Shhh." Bella palmed his teeny ass and rocked li'l man against me when he moved. He settled down again, tasting his tongue, the cutest smirk on his face as he slept. "He looks so much like you," she whispered.

I disagreed. "He looks like you. Even Jasper agrees." He's got her dark hair, but his eyes are on the light side—might turn green soon. "But, yo…you know where the cash is, where my credit cards are—obviously. Get her a room somewhere nearby."

"I have her flight info. You gotta pick her up from LaGuardia, too," she sighed, not meeting my gaze. "I doubt she has money for a cab. It's like fifty bucks, and why should she when you can—"

"It's fine. Lovely even." My tone was on the sarcastic side. "Tell me when and I'll scoop her." I plastered a placating smile on. "But…she might not even wanna be here, in this house." It was hard for me in the beginning—getting used to living here, where ghosts of the past are ever so present.

Then again, with the way she'd always spoken about my father . . .

If Dad was on fire and Elizabeth had a bottle of water, she'd drink it.

"The way I was brought up…I mean, my grandma always said that family should stay _with_ family, but we can put her in a hotel. I don't want you to be unhappy."

"It's fine," I said, leaning to place a kiss on Ed's cheek. "He's heavier…out for the count. Well, the next four hours."

Bella beamed as she gathered him into her arms. "Are you going to bed, too?"

I nodded as I turned to the television. "Soon. I gotta open the pizzeria tomorrow and now…" I hoped my mother's flight wouldn't arrive until the afternoon. "I'll be right up...in a few minutes." I'd paused the news earlier, curious about what was happening overseas.

"I'll be back to clean up after I put him down. But you don't gotta wait for me. I hafta pump, too." Bella still wore that breathtaking smile as she went upstairs.

I watched her go.

As soon as she was gone, I turned the sound up on the TV while I also straightened up the living room. There was clutter, but it wasn't a mess. Usually, I wouldn't care. With Ed's stuff everywhere and Bella's obsessive need to clean before bed, I started before she could come back.

I knew she was tired, doing way more than me with being a mother and trying to help plan that party.

When the sports announcer came on, I paused the news to grab a pen and paper—to jot down tonight's scores.

But then I swore I'd heard something.

Thinking it was the floors creaking, Bella upstairs, I didn't give it much thought—it being an old house and all.

However, when I heard the handle being jimmied on our back door, I knew something was up.


	111. Chapter 111

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

* * *

**Tribute**

**Chapter 111**

Anxiously, I glanced around, looking for a weapon—something I could use to defend myself—my family. I should have run upstairs, as letting whomever break in wouldn't be a problem if I had my piece on me.

But I didn't have time for much of anything before two men entered through our kitchen.

I'd grabbed the bat that sits near the front door, hiding near the stairs.

"I saw you already," a familiar voice said.

Bat in hand, I turned to Pete, Joshie-Bones' little brother. He was with their other brother, Paul, who I hardly know. Pete's affiliated but he's not a made man. He follows Joshie around like the second-fucking-coming, and I think Paul sells insurance.

"To what do I owe the visit?" I raised a brow while my heart hammered away. Wiseguys, even wannabes, only make house calls for one thing. These guys don't have their buttons. They were making an egregious error, as I'm untouchable to them. "You could'a knocked." My eyes settled on the heat in his hand. It was silenced, a skinny barrel attached to his nine.

Pete wore a smile. "Our brother sends his regards—" He was about to raise his hand, but then Bella came traipsing down the stairs.

While his head turned, I knocked him in the jaw—quick to disarm him, nearly breaking his fucking arm in the process. He winced, moaned and groaned, as I placed his gun to his temple.

"You wanted to take me out?" I asked, gritting my teeth. "For what? For Joshie? He could be capo?"

"Edward…" Bella whispered.

For a second, _just for a fucking second_ while I handled Pete, Paul had snatched Bella—had a knife to her fucking throat.

"Let her go," I said, my stomach turning. "I'll shoot him before you—"

Paul wore a sneer. "You sure?" His grip on Bella's hair tightened, pulling her body against his. "You sure you wanna take that bet?" The blade dug into her skin, but he hadn't drawn blood.

Bella cried silently, her eyes boring into mine.

I was still holding Pete and he'd started to laugh. "This is funny?" I nearly shouted.

"Think about this, Masino…" Paul smiled, touching his nose to Bella's hair. "_Madonn'_, you smell good. We're gonna have fun with you."

Bella closed her eyes, cringing.

"Enough!" I snapped. "Let her go."

"She's one helluv'an insurance policy." He placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Yeah, your brother, too. In a few seconds, though, he'll only be dead weight. You hear me?" I chuckled but nothing was funny. "I think _you_ should rethink this. Whether I die tonight or years from now—doesn't make a fucking difference. Youse'a both dead." I stared down to Pete, my finger itchy and on the trigger.

"Hey!" Paul yoked Bella up again, making her whimper. "Use your brain, Masino."

It only took another millisecond, but I had thought about it.

A whole mess of scenarios flashed through my mind, fear and anger nearly immobilizing me—as I weighed all options. If I let Pete go, if I put the gun down, I'll die—they'll kill me, possibly hurt Bella while I watched, and then I'd wish I was dead.

I could shoot Pete and then Paul could hurt Bella.

There'd be a struggle while I…

_Would_ there be enough time? Or, was Paul as swift with his blade as he'd implied?

I didn't know what to do, and Paul was smart, cowardly ducking behind Bella, hindering any shot I had at clipping him first.

Knowing that if I surrendered, forfeited _my_ life, there was a bigger chance Bella and our son could walk away with theirs . . .

But it wasn't a guarantee.

This whole scene unfolded within a two-minute span, and yet it felt like a lifetime.

"Tick-_motherfucking_-tock, son." Paul grinned, digging his knife deeper.

Bella swallowed as I saw red—literally and mentally—the smallest nick since that knife had penetrated her beautiful skin. He was nowhere near her carotid. A jab to that artery takes less than a second to make, and it's a fatal blow, yet he hadn't gone for it.

I saw the pain and fear in Bella's gaze, her eyes never left mine, but she didn't make a sound.

The game Paul wanted to play was apparent now. The closer I get to clipping his brother, the more cuts he'll place in Bella. It was a scare tactic to get me to relent, surrender. As much as I loved Bella, as much as I loved our son, giving up now wouldn't necessarily save them.

I'd give my life for their word...

"Listen," I started, looking to the nine, making a show of how I was retracting it. "Let her go. You want me? You got me. There's two of you and one of me, no need to involve more. Let her leave, and I'll let him go."

"No," Bella mouthed with a slight shake to her head.

Paul steadied her. "See? She wants to stay."

I blew out a breath, trying to stay calm, trying not to lose my temper.

Every second counted, like I was defusing a bomb, and I didn't know which wire to cut . . .

"Stay?" Bella chuckled and a tear rolled down her cheek. "You're holding on to me, like I'm his wife or, or something."

Paul looked to me.

I knew what Bella was doing, and I quirked a brow to agree with her.

"That true?" he asked his brother.

Pete winced when I tightened my hold, twisting his arm a little more. "She means _somethin'_."

"She means nothing," I lied. "Do what you want." I placed the barrel back to Pete's head, my finger steady.

"Masino!" Paul wanted my attention again, but his eyes were pleading. He wasn't digging the knife into Bella, too worried about what I was doing. "You haven't thought about this." He was stalling, afraid his insurance expired.

Bella made a fist with her right hand. I knew what she was going to do, and I waited for it...just so she'd get farther away from that knife before I pulled the trigger.

Before she could do anything, our son started crying. His wails were heard from the stairs, and the baby monitor on the dining room table. It seemed to echo in this moment, and he gained everyone's attention.

"Yeah, she means_ somethin'_." Pete repeated himself. "You and Cathy are still trying, right?" he asked his brother.

"Shut your mouth!" I shouted, twisting his arm until I heard a familiar pop sound.

Pete cried out, his knees buckling.

Good, bad, or...fucking horrible, it was all about to unfold.

Paul nodded, glancing to the stairs. "It'd make her year—coming home with a new baby."

"Shoot him!" Bella exclaimed, nearly jumping out of her skin. She moved so fast, hopping about a foot into the air, and it made Paul fumble to get her. He grabbed for her while I almost let Pete go, needing to help her. "Edward, kill them—" She tried to punch him in the junk, and that dumbass dropped his knife trying to shield his stones.

It was a blessing, but her victory was short-lived. Paul yanked Bella back by her hair, dragging her toward the steps.

"Do it!" Bella cried, still fighting, trying to push him away.

Taking my eyes from them, I tossed Pete onto the floor before I popped one between his eyes. His body fell back, blood splattering the carpet.

But then Bella...Paul had his hands around her neck, trying to squeeze the life out of her—her back flush to the stairs as he hovered, and she clawed at his face.

Quickly, as fast as fucking possible, I came up behind him—lifting him away from Bella before I shot him in the back of his head.

Bella let out a clipped scream, which sounded more like a squeak, as blood, brains, and skull fragments hit the wall.

I threw Paul. "Motherfucker!" I kicked him the rest of the way down the stairs.

When my eyes found Bella again, I noticed that her cheek had blood on it, although it wasn't hers.

"Hey…" I bent low to her.

She gulped, her body shaking as she wiped at her face with her nightgown. "G-Good." She nodded. "Good. I-I'm—I'm—" Amidst the panic that nearly swallowed her whole, Bella stood up to spit and curse. "Spit on his soul!" Anger shone through her gaze. "Good…I'm glad you killed them." She plopped back down to sob. "Fuckin'..." Bella groaned, taking off her slippers to chuck them down onto Paul's dead body. "Piece'a'shit!" Pissed, she looked for more things to throw, her eyes landing on the heat in my hand.

"It's over," I whispered. "He's dead." I offered her the gun anyway. "You wanna empty the clip in him?"

She looked to me, dropping her shoulders, her face stoic.

Bella didn't know if she wanted to cry, or go on a rampage.

I knew exactly how she felt.

I felt it, too.

"You're okay." I inspected her neck and the mark was really tiny. "I'm sorry." I tried to keep my own tears at bay. "I'm sorry this happened." Little did she know, her coming down the stairs saved my life. "You mean _every_thing."

There would have been no struggle if she hadn't, as Pete was ready to blow me away from the first words that came out his mouth and be done with it . . . and I was defenseless. If they'd broken in a minute earlier, Bella would have been none the wiser. She wouldn't have even heard the gun, coming downstairs to be greeted with my dead body.

He'd only paused; his mind occupied the moment Bella crashed the party.

From now on, I'd always carry a piece—have one on me—or would it be best we moved? I didn't know.

"I-I'm fine," she whispered. "I just…I didn't—"

I pulled her into my arms, hugging her tightly. Her body shook with her sobs, but Li'l Ed was still serenading us.

"Eddie!" She pulled away from me, almost tripping up the stairs in her haste.

"He's okay…just crying." I chased her into the nursery. "All of that probably just woke him up."

Five minutes.

That's all it took—for them to break in, the struggle, my shooting them.

_Five fucking minutes._

I think I was in shock, too.

For the past year, and especially since CJ got busted, fuckers have been picked off and pitted against each other. Maybe it hasn't been peaceful within the organization. But as of _very_ recent, it's been quiet.

And coming to my home? Attempting to hurt my family, too? That goes against what morals and ethics _we do_ have.

Families are to be left alone.

Then again, Pete and Paul had yet to take the oath . . .

But Joshie had.

Bella didn't stop until she reached the crib. He was swaddled to the nines, and she snatched him up and into her arms. "I'll never let anybody hurt you." She soothed him. "Never. Never, never, never—oh my God." She stiffened, pleading. "Never—" Bella broke down into sobs again, these really ugly, sorrow-filled wails that broke my heart.

"Shhh." I kissed her forehead. "He's fine. I'll—you just—" I didn't know where we'd go from here.

Now that they were dead, now that we were fine, I was okay. I was still mortified that they'd entered my home…and I was useless. Well, maybe not totally useless. I don't know what I _would have_ done if Bella hadn't come down.

For over four years, if I wasn't in combat, I was training for it...hand-to-hand, weapons, learning how to be crafty. Killing, being a war machine—that's what I trained for. Nothing else interested me. Knowing and studying the different factions of infantry, every type of war fare is a skill, something I excelled at. You name it, I know how to do it. I was a motherfucking Marine. When did I stop thinking like one? Shit should be no different now.

Whether I'm in Baghdad or Bensonhurst . . .

I know how to disarm, fight better than most, and I can kill with my bare hands.

I've done it before...killed without a weapon.

I guess I just wasn't thinking about myself, or what I could do...pausing the way I did.

Bella and Eddie were at risk. The price was too high.

I'd make sure that never happened again.

Even if I wasn't physically harmed, my pride took a huge hit, but that didn't matter.

"I—I—" Her lip quivered. "I'll get cleaned up." She turned back to me. "And God forbid something happened to you…I'd—oh my God, Edward." She was still in shock. "What the fuck? I was just coming down to straighten up—" She held her forehead. "The living room—"

"The living room's fucked now," I whispered. "Don't worry about that. What's important is that we're all safe."

"Edward—"

"I'm sorry…but don't turn this into a fight." I rushed out, placing my arms around them both. "Please. I'm fucking sorry I couldn't protect you."

Bella disagreed. "No…you did. You protected us. I don't…I'm not fighting." When our son started fussing, Bella rocked him. "I'm sorry, baby." She placed her lips on his head.

Again, little did she know—being held by Paul or not, threatened or not—she actually kept cool better than me during all that shit. It was okay she fall apart now, although I hoped she wouldn't. Well, I hoped she'd calm down soon, that she won't be traumatized.

"Hey…we'll be fine." I didn't know what else to say, but I knew that to be true. "With my own life, baby. Don't—" My lips lingered on hers. "Everything's going to be fine."

She sniffled, nodding. "I love you."

"Bella…" There wasn't a word in the English language that defined my feelings—love feeling too small. "I love you, too."

Bella took the baby with her while I slumped back, exhausted, against the crib.

Actually, I didn't want to let them out of my sight.

Logically, I knew there were two dead fuckers downstairs.

* * *

**Thank you for reading. **


	112. Chapter 112

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 112**

Once Bella was put together and our son was bundled, and we'd packed up all the shit we'd need . . . we crossed the street, my arms filled with things. I looked like I'd just finished looting a baby store.

Then, we trailed through our neighbors' backyards—trying to get to Jasper's unseen. We'd made it in no time.

Jasper and Alice were in bed.

Judging by the noises, they were fucking, but we have a key.

Careful not to disturb them, we tried to get ourselves situated. But Jasper knew the moment we'd arrived. He came running down the steps with a shotgun, like he was gonna do something.

When Jasper saw it was us, he was only relieved for maybe half a minute.

My friend was alarmed, concerned for his sister, and Bella was reluctant to let me leave.

As soon as I'd turned for the door, she hopped to latch onto my neck. Honestly, all I aimed to do at this moment was confer with Jasper outside, and I needed a cigarette badly. Since it'd happened in my home, I was torn as to what I should do.

"Baby…" There was plenty I could have said, but I didn't think I needed to. She saw, she knew shit had to be done. "Stay here with Alice."

Bella nodded, blowing out a breath as she turned to her friend.

Alice was none the wiser, smiling and crooning while she unwrapped our son. His little body was covered by a snowsuit that's too big, and a large blanket—his teeny face peeking out. Eddie was awake, his tired, grayish eyes wide as they traveled, taking in the change of scenery.

He really is the cutest fucking thing . . .

"Alice can watch him," she whispered. "I'll help you—"

"Whoa…" I kept my tone low, bending to nip her lips. "No, you stay. Go in my old room, go to sleep with Eddie…Get some rest." My thumb circled the small nick in her skin, where the knife—

Angry, I took my hand back. "You guys stay."

Bella nodded, staring at her feet. "I just thought I'd help."

I grinned, nudging my nose to hers, needing to see her eyes. "Thank you."

The side of her mouth pulled up. "No one should know," she whispered, her head turning to see Jasper and Alice.

"I trust Jasper…Don't you?" I asked.

Her brow furrowed. "Of course, but he faints at the sight of blood—"

"He'll get over it." I pulled her into my arms to hug her tightly. "I'll be back as soon as I can. You rest, settle in…" I had no idea how long we'd be staying here. "You can pump before bed, like you always do." She does that nightly, filling Eddie's bottles and whatnot for the next day, and we'd brought all that stuff with us. "We pretend tonight didn't happen. I know it'll be hard, but…"

In fact, it won't be long until Joshie knows his brothers had failed—hadn't taken me out. He'll either run, or come looking for me himself. I doubted the latter.

"I'll manage," she said. "But you be careful."

"Always am. You hold on to this." I placed a revolver and a silencer in her hand. Then I took it back to screw on the silencer. "Be careful with _that_."

She agreed as she placed it into her large purse.

When Alice squealed, we turned to her. "I just wanna eat him." She cradled our son close. "I love happy babies!" Eddie had fish lips from being almost squished, but he did seem content, his head wedged between Alice's tits. "And I love dis baby boy…yes, you're beautiful. Yes, you are," she crooned. "Ugh!"

Bella giggled, watching them.

I shook my head, meeting Jasper's stare.

He opened his mouth to say something, but then Alice cut him off. "I can't wait to have a baby."

Bella sighed. "I won't lie…I've never been happier." She glanced back to me.

Gazing into those eyes, I almost forgot myself, forgot about everything. "I love you," I mouthed, my lips meeting hers.

"I love how happy you guys are, too." Alice got weepy.

I pulled back, placing my arm over Bella. "Try to relax."

She nodded. "Eddie has to go to sleep, or his whole day will be screwed up tomorrow, and I don't want him cranky." She whipped to face me. "Your mom—"

"Everything will work out," I promised, elated that she worried about such frivolous things. "The living room carpet has to go, along with the runner on the stairs…but the floor's not too bad, hardwood underneath." I shrugged. "I'll polish—"

"I don't care about that…what the house _looks _like."

"It'll be safe, too," I said.

Jasper didn't say anything about anything, not even Alice's baby comment. "We'll be back soon." He placed a kiss in Alice's hair before giving his nephew and Bella a smooch.

A few minutes later, Jasper and I were in his backyard. It took me less than thirty seconds to break it all down, rushed my words in a hushed whisper. His eyes grew wide, and he didn't have much to say. Jasper was angry, obviously, and he suggested we call Colleoni.

I thought that was a sound plan as well.

After all, I mean . . .

I think I know why there was a mark on me.

My godfather has yet to appoint someone to be _caporegime_ of our crew.

It's between Joshie-Bones and myself.

He's obviously been in the game longer, but I've moved up very quickly.

If I were him…?

No, I don't believe I'd ever go to his house, scare the fuck out his kids and his wife—threaten his family. No fucking way.

Meanwhile, as it was earlier, I didn't think being capo was something to kill for. It was something that _if_ _given_ to me, I wouldn't squander. But if Joshie were to be chosen, I'd accept it—respect him as our new captian.

Again, as it was, I didn't take Riley out for his title.

I've carried out orders, just like I've stomped on fuckers for personal gain, but…

Rightfully speaking, Joshie's done the time, and he should get the title.

Now, he won't be getting anything as I plan to clip that motherfucker, but I digress.

What if the order didn't come from Joshie?

What if…?

It was a very, very tiny—a miniscule—part of me that thought it could have come from my godfather.

There is, however, a possibility.

Jasper called Colleoni direct and they sounded like old friends.

It made me grin for the briefest of seconds before he ended the call. Of course, nothing of importance was said over the phone.

Though, my godfather knew there was an emergency.

Cleaning my house, getting rid of them—I could do that myself. Pull up the carpet, slap a coat of paint on the wall by the stairs. It'd only take a few hours, to be honest. There'd be no playing around with meat grinders. I'd steal a boat from the nearby marina, a burial at sea, where in six months they'd wash up in a bay somewhere.

But I wanted answers.

I had questions, when I'd previously been told never to ask them, to accept whatever info I'd be granted.

My status doesn't allow me to be privy to certain things. Whenever Colleoni has a sit-down, I'm sitting at another table. I'm muscle, a soldier.

This involved not only me but my family as well.

You don't fuck with a man's family.

End of story.

"He'll be at Sal's in ten minutes. We should head there."

I nodded. "I got two bodies at the house." Then I laughed. "I still can't believe this shit." Overhead, I saw the light in my old room turn on, which eased my nerves just a bit. "Sorry 'bout this, man—just coming here, interrupting what sounded like a nice evening."

"Ed…" Jasper widened his arms. "We're family now—we _been_ family. No worries."

"Thank you," I said.


	113. Chapter 113

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

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**Chapter 113**

We made it to Sal's within five minutes.

Colleoni showed up right after us, concern etched on his face. He went down the list of names, worried, wanting to take inventory on everyone before we could get to business.

"Everybody's fine, but that fucker Paul—" I paused to laugh, just thinking about it pissing me off beyond reason again, like an instant flare up. "He had a knife to Bella, cut her, even if it's small…"

"You killed them?" He massaged my shoulder. "They're gone?"

I nodded. "They're…on my living room floor."

He took out his cell phone. "Anyone approaches you, you don't say shit. All right?" I knew that already. "I'll get someone to take care of it—"

I stopped him from placing the phone to his ear. "I can—"

He smiled. "This is your home, Edward. _Your home_. You need professionals, cleaners." Colleoni coughed into his fist and then excused himself. "My guys are good—everyone uses them. We'll all go to lunch this week, get youse acquainted. And your home'll be as good as new by mornin'. Promise." He placed his phone to his ear, turning away from us.

Jasper and I shared a look, while I wasn't sold on strangers having privileges to my house.

"Trust him," Jasper said without sound.

I nodded, pushing my wayward hair back.

"Just one more call…" Colleoni dialed again. "They'll be at your house in twenty minutes. And don't worry, they don't need you to let them in." He started speaking into the phone again, ending with, "Bring him to the club on Fourth." He spoke of Gazebo, and I turned to Jasper—wondering just how legit his new business would be.

My friend didn't make a comment.

"That settles that," Colleoni sighed. "I got my friend Vito bringing Joshie over to the club—"

"Joshie's mine," I said. "And it won't be quick." Especially if I had more time, given the fact that others would be cleaning my house. Then I nodded. "We should load his brothers into my whip—let him see them. Then we take a ride on a boat. Gazebo's right in Bay Ridge—"

"Joshie's mine," Colleoni interrupted. "But I like the way you think. Make that happen." He pointed. "My buddy has a houseboat docked at the pier—Shore Road." My godfather smiled.

Raising a brow, I looked to Jasper.

He shrugged, grabbing a cup of soda from the fountain. "I'm game."

And on we went, smoothing out the details in the midnight hour.


	114. Chapter 114

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

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**Chapter 114**

Colleoni couldn't seem to wipe the smile off of his face. A few times I'd wanted to inquire why, but I let it go while I was continually surprised that he was riding along in the first place. The boss doing grunt work with those who are beneath him. He seemed about as passionate as I was concerning Joshie's impending demise.

But when you're rolling with the boss, you barely have to lift a finger.

Pete and Paul were delivered to us, arrived at the docks about ten minutes before Vito did, and Vito had Joshie in his trunk.

I didn't waste any time, loading his brothers into the boat quickly. Each were in actual body bags.

Colleoni's people, who were cleaning my house, worked fast, too.

Last I heard, they were already painting. Since I never did anything to the walls when I moved in, all they were doing was slapping another coat of primer on.

I made a mental note about that.

I wished I could have been there—learn a few new tricks.

The only thing left to do was load Joshie onto the boat. Vito had covered his head. Joshie was hog-tied, wearing a pillowcase, and the first thing I did was kick him. He cried out, begging for his life.

I bent low so he'd hear me as the engine roared to life. "Hey…it's me, Masino."

Joshie stilled, stiffening.

I stood up to kick him once more.

Jasper was behind the steering wheel, and then we all flew back when he charged the gas. "Sorry!" he shouted, having stopped the boat. Well, he just let go of the accelerator, and we floated—still in the bay.

"Get the fuck out the seat," Colleoni laughed.

Jasper chuckled. "Like I know how to drive a boat."

"You don't know, you say somethin'." Colleoni took off, sitting in the captain's chair.

While we made our way out to the ocean, I stared at Joshie—wondering what I should say, or if anything needed to be said. I also thought about what might be the most painful ways to hurt him.

Since I still had his brother's silenced nine, since Colleoni and Jasper were busy bullshitting—wouldn't hear it over the engine anyway—I drew the gun to shoot out Joshie's kneecap.

No sound in the world could muffle his screams.

Colleoni and Jasper jumped to life, turning to face me.

"He was trying to get away," I said, a smile creeping up on me. When Joshie moved again, I got his other knee. "You saw that." I pointed.

Jasper had wide eyes, but Colleoni grinned at me. "Wait 'til we get a couple more miles out—put him in the cabin with his brothers."

I raised a brow, thinking that a great idea. "Help me," I told Jasper.

My friend made a face at all the blood.

"It's just the blood that grosses you out?" I asked, dropping Joshie onto the floor.

Jasper pushed his hair back, turning green and pale. "Blood and boats don't mix—" He ran out of the cabin.

I laughed, lifting Joshie so he sat at the card table.

"Please, don't kill me—"

"Oh…" I chuckled. "We're past that, my friend. Your death is inevitable. Pray to whichever God..." I patted his back, surprised he hadn't passed out from the sheer agony he was in. "You're holding up well."

"My brothers—"

"They're here." I reached to take off the pillowcase, and then I turned his chair—so he could see Pete and Paul who were on the floor. Before Vito left, he wrapped chains and weights around them, ensuring they'll sink once we push them overboard.

Joshie inhaled a shaky breath. "It-it was Pete's idea," he whispered, his eyes unseeing. "They-they offered, were sure Colleoni would pick you."

I didn't say anything.

"I fucked up." He palmed his face.

I left him with that, going upstairs to smoke a cigarette.


	115. Chapter 115

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

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**Chapter 115**

A few minutes later, Colleoni stopped the boat. We were literally out in the ocean—a sea of blackness surrounding us, barely any moonlight because of the overcast sky. Since it's early April, the air was still brutally cold, but I didn't feel it—my nerves frayed, or adrenaline warming me. I wasn't sure.

"Go get Joshua," Colleoni told Jasper.

My friend hopped to it, didn't bitch about it.

"Elizabeth is arriving tomorrow."

"You know about that?" I asked.

He nodded. "We've…kept in touch."

"Really?" That surprised me. "Kept in touch. You told her about—"

He smiled. "Liz…I haven't seen her in ages. Yes." He nodded. "When you settled in here, and I knew you weren't contacting her, I did. I thought you'd call after your son was born. You said you would."

I didn't have a valid excuse, nor did I make one up.

"We'd talk throughout the years. I always called on your birthday—sent her money sometimes."

I shook my head, as what he'd said didn't add up, seemed suspect. "We never had any money, and…my father instructed you to keep my inheritance from her." I wanted to get some things straight. "And I never talked to you, not on my birthday, not after I left Brooklyn..."

"I kept his wishes." He placed his hand on my shoulder. "Son, your place was with her—your mother. After your father passed…things were fucked. My head was screwed; I'd lost the only brother I'd ever had. But…I tried my best to do right by you. And I thought you should know…I kept tabs on you your whole life."

"Why?" I asked.

He blew out a breath, taking a seat on the boat's ledge. "Ed was my best friend, a brother…I loved him, and he truly was the bestest friend a guy could have. Loyal, honorable, and he always did the right thing…But he _wasn't_ the best husband." Colleoni pursed his lips. "It's complicated. I've said too much already."

"Go on," I encouraged. "Whatever you have to say…" I wished he'd just say it.

"He…He did me a huge favor. Esme had been betrothed to me since I was fourteen—old school traditions." He waved a hand as Jasper threw Joshie onto the ground. "Take him back. I need a few minutes."

Again, Jasper didn't bitch, following orders by kicking Joshie down the few steps.

"Esme's maiden name was DeGaetano, of the Chicago DeGaetanos. Do you get what I'm saying?"

"It was a business merger." I threw my cigarette butt into the water.

"Precisely." He coughed, quick to close his coat. "She was a princess, and I was to be her prince. But, one night…your father and I were seventeen, and we skipped out on a family dinner to go to Coney Island." He smiled at the memory. "We met Liz and a few of her friends that night." Colleoni frowned, reaching to pull a cigar from his pocket. "She was fifteen, two years younger than us."

I helped block the wind while he lit the head. "I knew they met at Coney Island," I said. "What's the punch?"

Colleoni puffed on the cigar, the smoke quickly disappearing. "Lizzie, your mother, was _my_ first love." He placed his hand on his chest.

I stepped back, away from him, a million scenarios running through my mind. The big one being, "Are you trying to tell me…?"

"What?" He couldn't hear me over the whipping winds.

My heart hammered away. "Are you my father?"

He threw his head and laughed. "No."

I held my chest, relief washing over me.

"You look _just like_ your father," he explained. "I'm good, kid, but I ain't _that_ good."

I laughed through my nose. "If you loved my mother, how'd Dad end up with her?"

He continued to smile. "I approached my father, and my uncle…told them I wasn't going to marry Esme, that I'd planned to marry Lizzie. I'd gotten the ring, and I even thought about eloping after I graduated high school." He shrugged. "My family had money. Lizzie's family didn't, and her parents agreed to my proposal. I just needed my own family on board. I even…wanted to forgo my career choice. Lizzie made me think anything was possible. She talked me into trying the premed program at NYU. She's was fun, carefree, silly...gorgeous, happy."

"That...doesn't sound like her at all." I wondered how well he knew Elizabeth these days. "What happened?" I sat next to him.

"Life," he sighed. "While I was trying to run for a future with Lizzie, my...inevitable, my fate caught up to me. My father threatened to kill me…someone got to Lizzie, scared the fuck outta her. My father wanted her to disappear," Colleoni whispered, his eyes unseeing, lost in memory. "I asked Ed to take off with her, keep her safe—"

"Oh, no," I whispered. "They fell in love."

He shook his head. "Nope. They drove all the way to Indiana, and they fought—bickered over everything under the sun." He chuckled. "They hated each other, and Liz would call me crying from the road. But what was the alternative?" He showed me his palms. "And your father put his own neck on the line for me. Him helping me out, both of us going against our dads...I begged Lizzie to tough it out, thinking I could talk some sense into my father…but it was bigger than me, bigger than what my heart wanted."

I nodded.

"Chicago threatened a war, and they were a bigger family at the time." He paused, quiet while he puffed on his cigar. "Push came to shove, and I agreed. I just…I thought I could stay with Liz, marry Esme, but keep Liz on the side." He looked to me. "You're young, but I don't gotta explain that, right?"

"A wife, a mistress. Yeah, I get it." I wondered if he thought me stupid.

"No disrespect," he added.

I waved a hand, not upset at all but fully engrossed in this story.

"I'd told Ed to come on back, there was no more beef…He dropped Liz off at home, they went their separate ways. I tried explaining, telling the truth." He cracked up again, laughing. "You see this scar?" He pointed right above his eyebrow, to a faint raised line. "She threw an iron at my head."

I smiled. "How'd she end up with my father?"

"She never wanted to see me again, swore she hated me, but that didn't last. I was greedy. I loved Liz but I was tied to Esme, who'd since moved to New York. Once it was back on, they moved it up...probably thought I'd change my mind again. We had this huge summer wedding." He sat up straight. "Esme was lovely, she truly was. It was hard not to adore her—beautiful, young, a sweetheart," he laughed, turning to me. "It's really not that much of a story…Esme and I got along just fine, great friends at first, and Esme got pregnant with CJ so fast." He shook his head. "I wasn't even—we weren't exactly the…typical honeymooners. Yeah, we consummated our marriage, which wasn't difficult…" He snickered. "I was a kid. If _the wind_ blew my way, I'd catch a hard-on." He cupped his junk, and I chuckled. "I knew everyone would give me shit if she wasn't pregnant sometime soon. But I didn't expect it to happen the first time...and, yes, that fucker's mine."

I didn't wanna repeat his words, tell him that CJ is his spitting image.

"Nevertheless, I'd sneak away to see Liz _any_ chance I had…I spent more time with her than I did my own wife and child...Neither one—_none_ of them—deserved that."

"She got back with you?...Really was your mistress?" That had me feeling uneasy. It was okay when he spoke of considering the idea. And I thought she ran off with my father, but...? This story is all kinds of fucked. "My mother?"

Colleoni continued like I hadn't said anything. "CJ was...three when Esme confronted me, finally approached me about the redheaded woman she'd seen me with. I wasn't as clever as I thought."

"Wow." I didn't know what else to say.

"She threatened to leave me, but I knew she wasn't going anywhere. I swore I'd stop seeing Liz, but…I just said that to get her off my ass. At the same time, Liz was hounding me, wanting me to make a decision, and I was too chickenshit."

"You had it all…why not try and keep it." Even if I couldn't comprehend his reasoning, I tried to understand.

"Gazebo had always been a club, but back then it was called Legacy." He pulled from his stogue. "Esme wanted a night off, wanted me to take her out. She never understood, thinking if she rolled with your father and me, she could get closer to me—which would stop me from seeing Liz. That night, Lizzie was there…There was a scene. Your father did his best to intervene, run interference. When Liz stormed out, he'd gone after her, and I appreciated it." He chuckled some more. "Whenever I'd get in hot water, any kind of trouble, Ed was always there to help—clean up my mess."

I grinned. "He was good at that, always trying to stop people from making mistakes."

Colleoni agreed. "We were kids…didn't know anything back then. My God." He stared to the black sky. "Even if it was the 80s, in our world, it was still like the 1950s. Your mother was even younger. When I met her, she was just a sophomore in high school." He winced. "By the time that night at the club rolled around, she was what? Eighteen? That was her chief complaint. By staying with me, she didn't take the scholarship to Brown."

"She got a scholarship?"

He nodded. "Very intelligent woman . . . The rest is history…pretty much."

"Wait a minute…How'd…What happened with my parents?"

"Oh…" He smirked, nodding. "When Ed went after her that night…I'd asked him to see her home, and he..._saw_ her home. The story goes, she threw herself at him, and your father went for it...was drunk. I knew he had a weakness for that—such a cooz hound. It didn't matter if they otherwise hated each other. And Liz wanted to hurt me by going after my best friend."

I furrowed my brow. That didn't sound like my father at all. "He just...slept with her? Behind your back?"

Colleoni slapped my bicep. "It really wasn't a secret. Lizzie called me from the apartment I'd gotten her. She cried, begged me to come over hours later...Esme was asleep, and so was your father...in Lizzie's bed. Bare-assed and all. _Madonn_'." He looked to the sky wearing a smile again. "I walked in, like, 'What the fuck?' and then your mother whacked me with her iron again. Ed didn't even wake up. He liked to mix pills with booze...He loved women and partying, and when he finally came to, he didn't deny it."

"What'd you do?" I asked. "You told me about how he died..." I clapped once to keep my hands together, to keep me from pushing him overboard. "I mean, he slept with someone you loved."

Colleoni raised a brow. "You wanna ask me somethin' else? But, no...I didn't do nothin' to nobody. I ate it, fuckin' dealt with it." He scoffed at me. "Think about it, Edward?" He poked my temple. "I'd wait fourteen years to pop him one? Edward, you'd be wise not to gimme_ all_ your trust, but foolish to believe I could harm Ed. Besides that, your father was untouchable...Brooklyn royalty just like me, and I ain't a snake."

I didn't reply, remembering back to the story he'd told me when I'd first arrived. "But there was a snake on his crew who set him up."

He widened his arms, gesturing to the cabin, where Joshie and them were. "It happens more often than I'd like."

I nodded, could obviously relate to that.

"You gotta computer? Get on Google, use the internet, webs, whatever-the-fuck to see how many known mafiosi disappeared the same year Ed bit it" He pointed. "Those were dark times...You remember going to Disney with Esme and Alice, right?"

"Not really." After my father died, I blocked out many memories, forgot a lot. "I was thirteen, I think," I whispered.

"We were at war with Boston, which...as time would tell wasn't a secret. We had rats in our yard, so we had to fumigate and watch our asses with dwindling numbers. Remind you of anything?"

"I hope it doesn't get worse, history repeats itself." My tone was low, as I felt badly for insinuating anything.

"Nah...this recession bullshit. No one can afford a war, which is a blessing and a curse," he laughed. "And...I'll take the blame for shit being as bad as it is now. I stepped back, gave CJ too many freedoms. He split the whole administration, turned some of my friends against me, and for what? So, he could disgrace his family? My own son did that to me, and I'm still playing catch-up, trying to right his wrongs." He cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry." I briefly glanced at Jasper, who was just listening.

Colleoni sighed. "Your father and I were best friends...brothers." His eyes met mine. "I couldn't and I wouldn't. That's my word."

"I believe you," I said.

"Back in those days, we shared everything...and while Ed knew I cared for Lizzie, he didn't know I _actually_ loved her. At the end of the day, though...Lizzie and I weren't married. A ring made someone off-limits. Before her . . . and while I was with her, I'd bag broads from Ed all the time. Maybe I was a cooz hound, too. Fuck it. It's true. We'd shared women before, which was nothing. It meant nothing. I couldn't hate him, nor could I hold it against him. I had no right…And love, Ed knew nothing about love until you came along." He reached to squeeze my shoulder.

"You came along _exactly_ ten months after that night. I thought you were my son…Everyone did. For a long while, we didn't know." His eyes found me again. "But…I won't lie and don't hold this against_ her_, please. Your mother came back to me—apologized, and she wanted my help to have an abortion, so she could get away. She wanted to run away—away from the rumors and ridicule. People knew. It was quite the scandal amongst…others." He coughed into his fist. "Her parents gave her a real hard time, wouldn't help her."

"I never met them," I mused.

"They died after your mother skipped town. She didn't even come back for the services. I sent flowers in her name, on both occasions."

"You wouldn't help her? My father wouldn't...give her a few hundred bucks?" Finding out that Elizabeth never wanted me wasn't surprising. Hearing the actual words didn't shock me since I'd expected it all along. It made sense in a sick and twisted way.

"The possibility that you might be his kid...Ed begged her not to do it. I'd never seen your father like that before. I had no idea why he cared so much, to be honest. Ed and Liz didn't love each other. They didn't even _like _each other," he laughed. "Yet…my eyes had been opened. I had to let her go. I was willing to let go of the past, move on with my life…and I did. Things just changed. I won't lie to you. I was still in love with Lizzie, although she…I really couldn't hold her sleeping with Ed against her either—me with the wife and kid at home, me…who promised her the moon and the stars and came up short." He pushed his hair back.

His forgiveness, his willingness to let go of what'd happened, really surprised me. Then again, he comes from a different generation, where women were playthings and pawns. There's also the possibility that my godfather still has no idea what love is, that he never actually loved my mother, and only thought he did.

_If anyone touched Bella..._

I don't wanna think about it.

"He married her," I said. "He did the right thing."

Colleoni nodded. "It was the only choice she had. He treated her well...well enough. We were young, but we were coming into our own—working to get our buttons. Given our family backgrounds, us being made was a given. But we still had to work. Your father spoiled Liz, gave her anything and everything she wanted. She was happy to raise you, and Ed was a great father—doting and loving. He just…They didn't have a relationship. As the years rolled by, she'd still call me crying. She couldn't have friends, she couldn't...date. Her family cut ties with her." He stared over to Jasper. "She had one girlfriend, a neighbor, and they were very close. They had boys the same age. They both had...husbands who didn't treat them correctly . . . in the broader sense. Ed was Ed, and he couldn't even take your mother out anywhere...That was my fault, too, in a way. Everyone talked shit, and..."

"My mother was looked at as...a whore."

"Watch your fuckin' mouth!" he spat. "But, yes...in certain circles. Wives of made guys only associated with wives of made guys. And who was their ringleader?"

"Esme," I whispered.

"Yes," he agreed. "It was hard, difficult. I could never turn my back on Lizzie."

"You felt guilty."

He nodded. "Basically..."

"So, she didn't have any friends..." I didn't want to say any more, but then... "Wouldn't I have been enough to keep her around? She was miserable," I whispered, "wasn't she? And she never wanted me to begin with."

"You were wanted and loved." He wrapped an arm over my shoulder. "Even if you'd turned out to be mine, your pops would'a fought me for it." He snickered. "For you, who could be your dad."

I appreciated him saying that. "My mother—"

"I hurt her—I hurt her bad and she was young, and I tarnished her reputation. It's still a small neighborhood, and she was bound to it. I'm not making excuses," he explained. "Then...she lost it after her friend died." He peeked at Jasper again. "You were around four..."

My breath caught. "Bella's mom." I looked to Jasper. He hadn't heard me.

"Yes...When Renee passed, Lizzie...she just couldn't deal anymore."

Now we had Jasper's attention.

"You guys never wondered how youse were best friends?" He waved a finger between the both of us.

I shook my head, as I honestly couldn't remember when I'd met Jazz.

Jasper punched my shoulder. "This fucker was just always there."

I nodded, smiling widely.

"You guys were babies. Real little fuckers." Colleoni chuckled. "Who remembers that far back?"

Neither Jasper nor I said anything. His mother died when he was four, the day Bella was born. Mine took off, and they just _told_ me she was dead.

"After Renee, Lizzie tried to run away with you. Then…that's when Liz and Ed started having problems. Obviously, your father caught her. He wouldn't let her take you, and he...wasn't a saint. You were his heart, she was trying to take you, and he didn't care what kind of loss she'd suffered . . . I paid him back by looking out for him, looking out for Lizzie by intervening quite a few times. She kept trying to take you and run, and I begged her to stop. I won't lie. If I hadn't, he might have killed her—stealing all his money and just taking you. Ed was a fantastic father but a terrible husband, and despite how that all went down, he was extremely loyal to his friends. I don't want you thinking less of either one."

"My mother left…I was little. I didn't know why I didn't have a mother. Aunt May-May was nice to me…regardless, so that was big of her." I didn't know what to say. "Dad told me Liz was dead. I believed that until he died."

"She toughed it out for another couple months…before your father just...Edward, _I begged him_ to let her go. Lizzie wasn't calling me crying because she missed me anymore. She was calling, hysterical and threatening to hurt herself. And what'd your father do? He gave her a loaded gun, called her on it, and I...I begged him." He became emotional, wouldn't look at me. "He finally relented, but he'd stashed you somewhere, wouldn't even let her say goodbye to you. He wouldn't even tell _me_ where you were...thinking I'd help her take you." Colleoni finally looked to me again. "I might have...it would have been a tough, tough spot...Given the opportunity, I don't know what I would have done, to be honest with you."

"Wow." My stomach rolled. "Did she ever try..."

"He would've killed her," he whispered. "She meant _nothing_ to him, Edward. What they had was an arraignment. Lizzie couldn't...she just couldn't. I think she stuck around for you, to be a part of your life. She just…She couldn't hack it anymore—she couldn't take it after Renee died. Your father had stopped trusting her, had people watching every move she made. But she still tried to get away, and she wouldn't leave you behind until she was_ forced_ to. Ed didn't love her, and he was a mean bastard when crossed, and that's what she did." He blew out a breath. "Lizzie left...She always kept in touch with me. Every year, I'd send her your school pictures. I kept her informed, let her know how you were. Ed knew I was doing it, too, but he never bitched about it. As long as she didn't come back, he wiped his hands clean. When you were around eleven, she moved again...from San Francisco to Seattle. She didn't call me, nothing. I didn't bother looking for her until your father died, and it took me a while to find her. She really wanted to disappear."

I was stunned to silence. I had no idea how to respond to any of that. Elizabeth always painted my father a monster. I guess, to her, he was a monster.

"I know Lizzie's still battling her demons. I don't know how rough you had it when you went out there. After Ed died...It wasn't that I stopped caring. Life happens. I did the right thing, getting you back to your mother. I was busy, had my own kids to worry about, and we were in the middle of a war. You were hidden in Foster Care, and then you went to Washington, were out of harm's way, and a large part of me didn't want to interfere. I felt I owed Lizzie that...Her son, her life, her freedom. But I'd call every year on your birthday..." He scratched his brow. "Lizzie started calling _me_ when you joined the Marines. She wanted me to keep tabs on you with any connections I had...said you liked your space." He showed me his palms. "She wanted you to go. To Lizzie, Bensonhurst was worse than...Christ, the Middle East, which was fucking extreme." He rolled his eyes. "If you were a Marine, you weren't a _soldato_ working for me. She knew how much you admired and loved your father. Lizzie knew you'd make it back here."

"I..." Again, I was at a loss.

"I did my best to do right by the both of them. I got you back to Lizzie, and you were to get your father's fortune at twenty-one. It was waiting for you, right?" He grinned, ruffling my hair.

I nodded.

"I didn't do it all outta guilt neither. No one _made them_ sleep together." He shrugged. "I did what I felt was right to all those involved. I was always loyal to Ed. I loved Lizzie, and I was...loyal to her when I could be. We were all fucked in one way or another...I don't know what else to say. I've said it all . . . You know everything now. You're a good kid. Between the both of them, they did a helluva job." He got to his feet. "Not a day goes by that I don't wish—" He groaned a huff.

"You would have stayed with my mother?"

He grinned. "No, not a day goes by that I don't wish Ed was still here. He could be the boss, and I'd…I don't know what I'd be."

"You don't like being at the top?" I smiled, thinking his statement a contrast to his whole demeanor.

"It was never mine. I never wanted it, knowing Ed was being groomed for the throne. My uncle was the boss for decades. He had all girls...no boys. He was your father's godfather, a good friend of your grandfather. Your pops was inducted for the sole purpose of being the successor. We'd known each other forever, already best friends when we were eight. So, we just did everything together. I'd always be just a little bit in the background, which suited me fine." He wore a silly grin. "They used to call us 'the heir and the spare'. Unfortunately, I mean, Uncle Al lived a very, a very long life. He wouldn't retire for shit. All us guys takin' orders from the fuckin' crypt keeper and shit. He finally kicked the bucket in oh-three..."

"You've only been the boss for ten years?" I asked. Even when I was a kid, Carlisle and my father seemed larger than life itself.

"Give or take...Sometimes I drive myself crazy thinking about the 'what if's, you know? If he would'a handed over the reins..."

"Dad wouldn't have been pulling a job," I finished for him.

"Al was a good boss, don't get me wrong. Ed and I ran shit together, and people assumed one of us was boss." He stepped closer to me. "But they never really knew. We ran shit old school. We conducted our business, we shied away from the stupid shit, and we worked together." Colleoni was real serious all of a sudden. "People get greedy, they stop working together and for each other. They only think about themselves and not the bigger picture. Al would've been popped fifty years ago if anyone really knew who he was. Those within knew...those closest. Ironically, those closest usually pose the biggest threats." Now he was nonchalant. "Maybe I never wanted it, but God help anyone who tries to take it from me. I grew into my shoes."

"You did," I admitted. "But, if you don't mind me asking…" There were loads of questions I wanted to ask. I wondered what was so special about me, why he's taken such an interest. Now I knew it was because of my parents. He was keeping a promise to the both of them, to look out for me. I knew why Jasper posed as his favorite. He wants Jazz for Alice, but me? Sure, I'm his godson. Sure, he might feel he owes my father something—owes my mother something. But Colleoni has gone above and beyond, looking out for me, being extra nice to me. "Why me?"

He reached to palm my cheek. "Because…one day, it'll all be yours."

"I—"

"My flesh and blood double-crossed me…It's not about treating you better than CJ. That boy had all my love, all my trust, all my faith, and he was to have my crown. He had everything. He _took_ everything and anything that wasn't handed to him, and he crossed me, tried to kill me." He touched his chest. "CJ, I don't know where we'd gone wrong with him…I don't—" He furrowed his brow. "When you were first back in New York, my biggest fear was you and CJ battling it out. And I told you that, that I worried about that. Can some wiseguy go on a spree, kill us all, and take it...? Of course. It's possible, but by right...not just _anyone_ can be the boss. Like I said, by right, if I'd have kicked the bucket a few months ago...doesn't matter. _Capos, Soldatos_, and Associates would look to you or CJ for direction. They'd expect one of youse. But just because you're Edward Masino..." He shrugged. "You still had to get your hands dirty, earn my trust, become a person of worth. When everything happened months ago, I took Riley under my wing. He was also my godson, although I wasn't_ that_ close to his father. He expected it, he wanted it, and he'd earned it...working harder than CJ and yet trapped in his shadow. Understand?"

"Yes." That's basically what Riley used to bitch about.

"You weren't ready. If I would have bumped you over Riley, he would've tried to kill you. You would have been seen as my favorite, became a target. When I found out that Riley he defiled my daughter, brought shame to my family…Most of all, though, I was more hurt that he didn't come to me, that Alice didn't come to me. But he should have, being that he was older." He was pissed now. "He should'a done the right thing." He wiped his hands clean. "And after all I'd done for him..."

"He always told me that if I was loyal, treated you well, you'd treat me even better," I admitted, and I didn't say that to make Jasper feel any kind of way. Maybe Riley and Alice did what they did, but Riley wasn't a bad guy until he wanted Jasper's head.

"He was correct, but any motherfucker who did what he did would'a got it, or maybe worse. I don't know what you did with him." He cracked a smile.

So did I. "Do you wanna know?"

Colleoni gave me a slight head shake. "It's best I don't." He looked to Jasper. "Bottom line, I've been fair. I gave CJ and Riley a fair shot. Riley gotta shot when he wasn't even supposed to. I gave them both what I did...mostly because I loved them. It was their right to be who they were, and _you_ deserve a shot at it, too."

"Because..."

Colleoni didn't let me speak. "You have to be groomed, which is why I haven't bumped you to captain just yet. I _was_ going to give it to Joshie." He shook his head. "That dumb motherfucker . . . I don't know how long I have, Edward. These past few months, I'm doing my best to rid the garden of snakes, understand? I'm doing my best to clean up for you, so your transition is easier. You've got the balls, you're loyal and fair, and you've got the respect. Even if we've gotten smaller as a family, we're still strong…We're still on top. And you're just like your father. I can't tell you how proud Ed would have been—to know you now."

I felt a bit weepy, but I refused to shed a single tear.

"Soon, things will balance out. It'll be the Masino family, how it should'a been." He gave my cheek a gentle pat.

I didn't know how to reply.

"If it's too much, I can appoint a new successor. Another reason I'm doing this is so that youse don't kill each other when I kick the bucket . . . and I don't think you'd kill to be boss. You'll want to earn it, train for it, because that's who you are."

"How sick are you?" I asked.

"Eh…I'm not dying yet, but you never know." He didn't exactly answer me. "I'm bumping you to_ capo_ anyway, so your boys kick up to you—you'll have some money. You have any questions, need direction as far as that shit goes, I'm here for that too. You're comfortable right now—you collect around the Avenue. If you wanna plan some big heists, you have my blessing. But leave the trucks alone." He waved his finger at me. "You, too, Cigno."

Jasper saluted him.

"You wanna truck? Have someone else boost it for you. You're on to bigger and better things. From now on, you roll with me…_unofficially_ as my second in command."

"Underboss?" I asked, my tone laced with shock. "Are you kidding me? I've only been in it—"

"CJ was my underboss, Riley was my underboss...and you are. The only person who'll know is Cigno—your buddy, and others will find out as time goes by. A few'll get the hint if we're rolling together often enough. They'll know but they won't know."

"I never knew Riley—"

"He was dumb to fuck my Alice, but smart in that he didn't tell nobody nothin'. CJ used his name to get his foot into every door. You don't do that. You wanna be known as a tough guy? A wiseguy? Fine. But _nobody knows_ what you do."

I nodded, my heart rate speeding up. "Those _who do_ know will know I've only been around a year."

"As far as anyone is concerned, you've spent the last four years defending your country…You have years under your belt. Understand?"

"Yes," I said, baffled. "There's too much I don't know." Besides stick-up jobs, having a brass pair, and little to no remorse when it comes to hits—being crafty and good at that shit, too—I've only taken orders. I've done what I've been told and excelled by doing a few things for personal gain. But I have no idea what goes into being a boss. I rolled with CJ, Riley, and always Colleoni. All three have been different, had different styles. "I don't know anything—"

My godfather leaned in closer. "But _nobody's_ gonna know that, and I plan to teach you. Everything I know, _you'll_ know." He poked my chest. "I'm still your boss. While I love you, I can still make or break you, drop you down in rank if you fuck up...or..." He weighed his hands in the air, weighing those two options. "Both choices are fucked. So, don't screw up, don't cross me. And if you're gonna clip me, you better make sure you do it, that I'm good and dead after you pull that trigger." He spoke of his own death, my icing him like it was nothing. "I have faith in you...that you won't do none of that. You have no reason. That's what I never understood?" He likely thought of his son again. "It'll be yours someday, maybe someday soon, just not tomorrow."

I didn't have a reply.

A slow grin lit his face up. "You're perfect already. The strong, silent type." He palmed my cheeks and got my lips again, landed a loud smooch right there. It made me laugh. "Whatta ya say? You wanna take your shot?"

Shocked, because I didn't think I had a choice, I paused.

"You get back to me in a few days." He waved a hand. "It's a lot to think about, but first…Jasper!" he shouted for him.

Jazz was in the driver's seat, and he'd heard our whole conversation, but he didn't show any reaction. "I got him." He disappeared to grab Joshie.

"I'll give him a hand." I ran below deck.

As soon as I descended the few steps, Jasper grabbed me. He took hold of my biceps and shook me. "Holy shit…Is he serious?" he whispered.

I blew out a breath. "Sounds like it."

"Edward...you'd be the most powerful man in New York, the Eastern Seaboard—"

"Boston—" I started.

"They never recovered their numbers from years ago. It's New York, Chicago, and Vegas...three largest families in America. Then, then there's L.A, Miami, Philly, and Jersey...but—"

"Relax." I patted his back. "I haven't accepted and then I should probably talk to Bella."

"Psst!" Jasper pushed me. "I love my sister and she's a wonderful mother. She's really coming into her own. But she's nineteen. She's still a kid, Ed. How can _she_ weigh in? It's best you do what you do, and leave the big details outta the equation."

That didn't sit right with me. "She'll be my wife, the mother of my kids. Doing this...Jasper, it's _way bigge_r than what I been doin'. Sure, people will do for me, but I'll never be home. It'll affect her, too, and then I don't want her being afraid and living in fear. Look what happened tonight?" I shook my head, thinking my godfather very generous. But maybe being the Big Kahuna just isn't for me. Of course, when I first got here, I was down for whatever ride—to see where it'd all take me.

All I could think of was my own father, my predecessors. I'd never fuck up where Riley and CJ did, but you just never fucking know what'll get you clipped one day to the next. Trust is huge, and even the slightest suspicion can get you killed. "We got Eddie now..." I said, and I wanted to see him graduate high school, get married, have his own kids. He flooded my mind; I didn't want to miss a thing. My priorities had changed. My father left me money, a house, and business. Bella and I don't have to be rich; she even said so. We could have lived comfortably with that, lived simply. I've made a few too many moves already...and I didn't necessarily regret them all, no way.

There was just no backing out, no running away.

"CJ and Riley..._they_ fucked up. You didn't fuck around with the dope and dust even when you were broke." He shrugged. "You fuck with Alice, and you don't gotta worry about Colleoni coming for ya." Jasper chuckled.

"Riley's really sleepin' with the fishes?" Joshie rasped. "Rat motherfucker." He spit on Jasper's shoe.

I kicked him, making him fall out the chair. "Mind ya business!" I turned to Jasper. "I'm a father. Maybe when you and Alice get there...you'll know what that means. Bella and Eddie are my whole life. They're what's most important. Bella, Eddie, food, water, oxygen...that's it." I shrugged. "I do what I do, but I really don't need nothing else."

"Edward..." Jasper drew out my name. "CJ's doing a bid. Riley's dead..._you_ killed Riley. _You_." He poked my chest. "You're afraid of these threats, but you're _the bigges_t threat out there right now, and with Colleoni at your back...They're scared of _you_. Peeps have _been_ scared of you since you rolled with CJ...Colleoni's new muscle'll be his right-hand man. That's picture-perfect, fucking ideal."

"My godfather—"

"Fuckin' faggot. You gonna cry now, Masino?" Joshie asked. "I get it. Daddy issues'll due a fucker in."

My eyes became slits as I thought about shooting him in his dick.

Jasper hit my arm. "Yo, you took on these two dead motherfuckers, and you didn't even have a weapon." He smiled down to Joshie. "That's for my sister, fucker!" He kicked Joshie in the balls and looked back to me. "The closer you are to the top, the harder it is to get to you...the more untouchable you are. That's what I'm saying. The power's cool, being who you'll be. Your namesake and—"

"My father was close to the top, and what'd that get him? A cemetery plot."

"My father was a lowlife hustler. They shared the same fate, but you're more than likely to get taken out where you are now." He ranted. "That's what I'm trying to say. There's a war. Who fights? The soldiers. Not those who sit in power. They're targets, but they're protected."

I didn't wanna discuss this anymore. "Why are you pushing me? What'll you get outta this?"

He widened his arms. "Like you, I got everything I need—my girl, a house, a car, some money. Yeah, I rode your coattails, because you wanted me there, to have your back." He was correct. "You hooked me up so I could make some money. I'll probably never get my button...I do dig the fact that, God forbid something happens, Bella will be taken care of."

I nodded. "Yeah..."

"You gotta weigh the risks. That's all, and there's less at the top."

"He's right," my godfather said, and I wondered how much he'd heard. "Edward, I heard all your concerns. They're very fuckin' valid. I can't promise nothin'll happen, but I promise to protect you and teach you how to do so on your own when I'm not around...if you'll let me." He squeezed my shoulder. "Money, power, respect...those are great incentives." He nodded. "But they don't mean dick, do they?"

I was embarrassed, felt ashamed, feeling like I suddenly didn't belong where I was. "They don't."

"And that's why you'd excel 'cause you're not in it for that, which is the most commendable. If your father was alive, that's who you'd be, his second-in-command. All I'm trying to do is set it right by giving you your shot, and I have faith. Also, those before me, your father, me...we worked hard to make it what it is. We've had some problems lately, but it's balancing out." He stared at me. "Would it be easier if I took the choice away from you?"

"I'm honored you'd even consider me. If you feel the bill should be passed to someone else..." I shrugged, tripping over my words.

I needed time to fucking think.

"I meant...not give you a choice. Bump you up and that's it." His stare never wavered, trying to intimidate me.

I didn't reply, knowing he could do what he wanted, and I...

My godfather sighed. "Like I said, you think and lemme know...It's late. It's cold. I talked too much and my throat is scratchy..." he grumbled, turning to walk up the steps. "Let's get rid of these scumbags. Bring Tweedledee and Tweedledum out first!" Colleoni spoke of Pete and Paul.

We were quick to haul those two motherfuckers onto the deck, and we were even faster to push them over the edge. They began to sink, disappearing within the seconds.

When it was Joshie's turn…

Colleoni surprised the fuck out of us.

_He_ just pushed Joshie overboard.

Joshie flailed in agony, crying and sinking and yet still trying to fight to keep his head above water.

"I'll tell ya what—" Colleoni laughed. "If you can swim to shore, I'll let you live."

"Plea—" Joshie took in a mouthful of water, not so mouthy now. "Pl-please!" There was no telling how cold that water was. "I'll—I'll—"

Colleoni turned to me. "Anyone ever teach you how to drive a boat?"

"Uh…" I placed the silenced gun back into my waist. "No."

"You're serious?" Jasper asked. "You're just gonna leave him treading water?"

Colleoni handed him a piece. "You're so concerned, you do it." His tone wasn't suggestive. It was a direct order, and I couldn't believe he'd ask Jazz. My friend might not have a choice in the matter anymore, whether or not he gets his button. He wants Jasper to join the club, be a member. "Go 'head." His eyes locked onto Jasper's wide ones.

"I—"

"Whatta you a fuckin' humanitarian now?" He bopped Jazz on the back of his head. "Do it."

"I'll just..." To take the heat off Jasper, I aimed for Joshie. It wasn't a big deal, killing those who are already dead. I could see why Colleoni had asked Jasper in the first place. Because of _that_ fact, it'd be easier on Jasper's conscience. He ain't no killer and should have left it alone.

Fifteen more minutes in that water, Joshie will be dead.

He might fucking sink and drown before that with two holes in his knees.

And if _anyone_ was gonna pop him one, let him go out easy, _I_ should get the satisfaction.

"_Aspetta_." Colleoni put his hand out to stop me, still facing Jasper. "This guy sends his brothers to clip Edward and your sister—they place a mark on Isabella, they made her bleed. You think he should get off easy...by a quick pop?" We saw eye-to-eye on that shit, but then I didn't really know where he was going with asking Jazz to pull the trigger. "Oh, right." He snapped his fingers. "There's the small possibility he swims to Jersey and lives…"

I nodded, agreeing with him. "Let him freeze to death—let him drown."

"But there's no guarantee he'll die," Jasper said, staring down to the gun. "If he lives...where the restitution in that? For Edward, for my sister, and their baby?" He surprised me by being down with it, that killing him wasn't the problem. His beef was the teeny possibility Joshie will live.

But what he said was fucking dumb.

I don't care if Flipper and Free Willy roll up to swim his ass to shore.

If left in the freezing water, and with how much blood he'd already lost, Joshie was sure to die.

Colleoni patted his back. "You don't get it...It's cool, though. We debate this any longer and it won't matter. If you're gonna clip him, just fuckin' do it already." He adjusted his gloves. We were all gloved since this wasn't our boat. My godfather and his friends have boats in the same marina. But we'd picked a random speedboat. "Well...?" He stared at Jasper, expectant. "We all did something…except you." He had another reason, one I didn't think about, wanting Jasper to accomplice himself.

"You want my silence." Jasper was also aware. "You have it—without me doing this, but I'll do it." He nodded, extending his arm as his eyes met mine.

I gave him a slight nod, encouraging.

"Edward's pretty but don't look at him." Colleoni gestured to Joshie, the dead man floating, and he rightfully deserved to die. "You keep your eye on the mark at all times..._madonn'_." He pleaded to the sky.

I snickered and didn't hide it, but then I felt bad.

My best friend's never bagged a bone before. And he has to do it with the boss breathing down his neck?

Jasper pulled the trigger, but he'd missed. "Stay still!" he shouted while Joshie was panicking, flailing and trying to get away. He hadn't gotten far at all away from the boat. Jasper went Wyatt Earp on his ass, firing six times in succession. One bullet managed to hit Joshie's head, and then we saw bubbles on the water's surface as he sank.

"You need glasses or somethin'?" Colleoni asked him.

"You got me nervous, thinking I'mma follow and be krill like Joshie." Jasper blew out a breath, placing his shaky hands under his pits. "Like I've fired a gun before..." He actually chuckled as he made eye contact with me. But I could tell Jasper was playing it off.

"What'd I say?" Colleoni shouted. "You don't know, you say somethin'. Now you got me feelin' bad and shit...I didn't know we had a virgin on the boat." He pointed to the captain's chair. "I'll buy you breakfast...but don't be a pussy about it. It happened and that's it." He gave Jasper a sympathetic pat on the back. "You get an 'E' for effort." He rolled his eyes at me. "You hungry?"

"I could eat," I said.

"Good. We'll go to the diner."

* * *

**Thank you for reading. **


	116. Chapter 116

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 116**

Vito met us at the marina. As Colleoni's…I don't know what I should call him, slave? Meanwhile, he's a capo. Vito was quick to hop on board and get to cleaning while we all left.

I reveled in my car's heater, happy to be out of the cold.

By the time we finished breakfast, it was four in the morning.

Exhausted, I didn't even bother going to my home to check shit out.

Colleoni said it'd be taken care of, and I decided to trust him.

Jasper and I said goodnight and then we headed straight to bed.

After undressing, I slipped under the covers, hoping I wouldn't disturb Eddie or Bella. According to the schedule, he had a bottle two hours ago. He'll sleep for another two to three hours, and I was grateful I'd get some rest, too.

Eddie slept in the bassinet that rested on Bella's side of the bed.

I checked on him before gathering Bella into my arms. A soft groan escaped my lips, feeling whole, at ease, no matter how crazy last night was.

"Edward?" she whispered, turning within my embrace. "I was worried…I didn't expect you to be so late."

"Sorry." I nuzzled my nose to hers. "It wasn't my intention." Truth is I didn't intend on being gone that long at all, didn't want to leave them alone. "How was your night?"

She sighed. "Up and down, up and down…any time Ed made a peep, Alice came running in." Bella smiled. "She meant well, but all she'd do was get him more worked up. They both fell out after his last bottle."

I smiled. "I love you…and I want us to get married, as soon as—"

"Whenever," she giggled, moving closer. "Life's kinda short, you know? Last night was nuts…I was petrified, but…" Her eyes met mine. "I keep reminding myself that we're all okay."

"Exactly," I admired her strength, immensely.

"What happened with the house?" She rested her head on my chest.

I groaned, squeezing her to my side and kissing her hair. "It's fine…I think. I didn't check it out. Colleoni had his guys clean it up."

"Oh." She leaned farther into me, scooting to half-lie on top of me. "Your mom's plane lands at two-fifteen, so you have time to rest. While you're gone, I'll have Jasper lug this bed over…" She drew circles on my chest with her finger. "What about…I don't know," she sighed, staring at me.

I palmed her gorgeous face. "We can get better locks on all the doors and windows, maybe put in an alarm system?" I asked, wishing like hell we could have sex. "If for any reason you're approached, cops or feds ask questions, you don't have to say anything—you don't have to answer. You let me know. Okay?"

She hummed, noncommittal as she turned to place a smooch on my palm—a kiss too sensual for my hand.

This moment in time was nice, just relaxing with Bella. I just yearned to be even closer, as I still haven't coped with how close I was to losing her before.

"Everything will be fine," I whispered, the lust in her eyes knotting my stomach up with excitement.

"We'll be okay." She wet her lips and seemed expectant? Were all these small touches Bella's way of initiating sex? Indicating she wanted to fool around? We haven't so much as kissed with tongue since Eddie was born—not wanting to get each other worked up when we can't get to the grand finale.

Both Bella and Eddie have appointments with their doctors within a day of each other for their six-week follow-ups.

We were told to abstain until that visit, to err on the side of caution.

"I don't wanna be afraid…of being home alone with the baby." She bent low to place another kiss on my stomach and then another until she lifted my shirt to kiss my bare skin.

Her lips made me shudder, my cock instantly coming to life.

Bella's tongue came out to make a trail, licking its way south before she'd place an open-mouthed kiss, ever so slightly sucking my skin into her mouth.

I grunted, pushing her hair away from her pretty face. "Bella…"

She rubbed her hands up my chest and hummed. "Sorry. I know you're tired."

I raised a brow. "I'm…_not _tired."

Her eyes met mine and she inched closer. "There's butterflies in my belly, I'm soaked—I want you so bad," she whispered, a slight squirm to her hips, and her admitting that...Christ, it fucking drove me wild inside.

"Oh, yeah?" I sat up to place my finger under her chin, guiding her mouth to mine.

Bella's kiss was fierce and sloppy as she tried to push me onto my back.

I gathered her into my arms so she straddled my lap, her fingers weaving into my hair while her body gyrated—creating friction.

My lips traveled from her mouth to her neck, licking, sucking, biting—needing more. My hands touched her everywhere, holding her the closest I could, and she still wasn't close enough.

"Edward…" She panted, her chest rising and falling rapidly. "I love you." She sucked my earlobe into her mouth, hissing when I pulled her hips down to grind my cock up against her.

I leaned back to pull her t-shirt off. Bella let me do it, and then I muffled my face into her breasts that I missed very much. Her body isn't back to normal just yet, but she was impossibly softer, more filled out, sexier . . . her fucking tits are huge these days, too.

A growl escaped while I brought her over to my side, making her back hit the mattress. Before I dove for her lips again, I peeled her sweats off, only to pause.

God, she was beautiful, sexy…

"I'm fine." She palmed my cheek. "I'm all healed."

"Good," I whispered, hovering and easing my hips between her thighs. "You want me?" I nudged her nose with mine.

She pulled my shirt off to throw it across the room somewhere. "I always want you." She smiled. "Right now, I _need_ you—to feel you." Bella ducked her eyes away, embarrassed.

I grinned, ghosting my fingers over the goose bumps that developed on her chest. "I'm yours, baby…yours for the taking. Anytime…" I needed her to know she needn't be embarrassed, as I aim to fulfill any and all desires she might have.

She held her stomach. "It's still—"

I pulled her hands away, gathering both into one of mine, holding them above her head. "You're still perfect." I sucked her bottom lip into my mouth with a groan. And I wanted to smash my face into her pussy so badly, I could practically taste her on my tongue. "Perfect, baby."

"Stretch marks and—"

"Shhhh." I kissed her deep, pushing my hard dick onto her, needing her to feel what she does to me.

Bella hugged my torso with her thighs, extending and exposing her neck, while my lips continued their assault there. She cried out when I suckled her nipple, her hands trying to squirm out of my hold.

Impatient, she used her feet to rid me of my boxers.

"Fuck me," she whispered through a whine; she wanted me real bad, and that…

If she'd driven me wild before, I was insane now, pushing against her instantly, trying to find purchase. "Sorry." I chuckled, letting her hands go. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her.

Bella didn't let me get too far, pulling me back down to her to stick her tongue down my throat—her hands clawing at my shoulders, trying to get impossibly closer still.

But then she stopped, and we shared labored breaths. "I just wanna crawl inside you." She rubbed up my chest. "I just—"

I nodded, knowing exactly what she meant, even if I couldn't accurately describe it myself. "I love you, Bella." My lips lingered on hers.

She moaned into my mouth, reaching between us to get a good grip on my dick.

I shivered, enjoying as she guided my way to her.

She placed me at her entrance, and I held my breath until she sheathed me, swearing my heart had stopped.

"You feel so good, baby." My teeth scraped down her jaw before I bit her skin.

Bella let out a muffled cry, placing her hands to my ass.

It was my cue to move, and I went slow, creating a steady rhythm with my hips. But it wasn't enough. Between thrusts, sloppy, passion-filled kisses, clawing at each other—before I knew it, I was going too fast, harder than usual, getting as deep as I could with sure strokes.

Sweat dewed on her forehead, and I knew my body with slick with an overabundance of it—excited, feeling amazing to no end.

"Oh…" Bella trembled before stiffening, and I slowed to watch, feeling her pussy hug my dick tighter.

"Beautiful…" I kissed her cheek picking up speed again.

"I love you, I love you." She pushed my shoulders, trying to get me on my back.

Wearing a wide smile, I lifted her from the mattress, switching positions without leaving her pussy. This was the wildest ride I'd ever been on, the passion and desire that filled the room was nearly palpable.

When we went for each other's mouths again, our teeth knocked together, which made us chuckle. But we weren't deterred.

Bella was on a mission, using all the strength she had to make my back hit the sheets.

But all I wanted to do was consume her, overcome with…I'd never felt this way before, wanting to dig my cock into her and go to town.

She felt the same way, kissing her way down my body until she took me into her mouth.

"Shit!" I jumped, and so did Bella.

Her head whipped to the bassinet, but Eddie was still sleeping. "Shhh." She licked down my shaft, and I sat up to watch her—never having seen anything sexier.

When she sucked me deep again, I had to blow out a slow breath, my body slumped back a bit—trying to keep myself from making a sound. Her hand jacked what she couldn't fit in her mouth.

Then she stopped, for which I was grateful.

I forcefully grabbed Bella, situating her, her thighs straddling me again. My cock found her fast, entering her swiftly—my palms planted to her back, not wanting her to move.

She moved anyway, her hips making small circles as she bucked them.

My eyes rolled, my forehead resting on her breast.

Bella reached between us to play with her clit, and I had to lean away to watch once more. "Oh my God…" She groaned, going faster.

Everything she was doing felt fantastic, but I wanted…

My hand replaced hers while I sucked her fingers into my mouth, needing a taste.

Bella came again, throwing her head back to let out a whimper.

Overexcited, I felt the fire building in my gut, and I didn't know how long I'd be able to hold on. Whenever Bella is on top, I find myself coming that much faster. "Bella, lemme taste you," I whispered.

She moaned, digging her nails into my shoulders as she started fucking me roughly—with no abandon. Bella even bared her teeth like some wild animal.

I loved it.

"Come!" she shouted only to panic and look to our son again.

I started laughing. "Be quiet."

She covered her mouth. "I…"

I cut her off with my lips, grabbing onto her hips to push and pull her on and off of me with force.

All too soon, and I was trying not to come again.

But like I said, Bella was on a mission—doing some sexy shit I'd never seen her do before. She grasped her own tit to shove it into my mouth. Every time she'd move her head, she'd do some sexy hair-flip thing…

She was like a fucking model, a porn star—my woman.

My body stiffened, my fucking toes curled, my eyes rolled, and I swallowed down the cry of pleasure as I came, holding Bella's hips tightly, my ass leaving the bed to get even farther into her. "Fuck…Damn, baby." I lazily kissed my way to her mouth, out of breath.

Bella smiled, palming my cheeks and bending low to give me a smooch. "That was amazing," she said and then she squealed when I switched our positions again.

"It was…" I sighed, hovering, my hands roaming everywhere. "Marry me Friday—technically tomorrow."

"So soon?" she asked.

I nodded, kissing my way down to her stomach.

"That's tomorrow…I—"

"Before the christening," I explained, nipping her hip. "Something small. I'm sure a priest at the church will hook us up for the ceremony. It takes fifteen minutes, and we can have a double celebration Sunday…everyone will be there, and we'll get the license afterward."

"Okay," she agreed.

"Okay?" I scooted lower, taking in her scent, her pussy glistening in the dimly lit room. "Christ, Bella…" From this angle, she looked even more beautiful—her hair a wreck and strewn across the pillow, her legs open. She was exposed, totally fucking naked, and I was able to see everything.

She grabbed my face. "Yes, I'll marry you whenever—doesn't matter. I'm sure Father Donovan will do it." Bella rolled her eyes. "He's so old and old school." She huffed, wearing a wide smile.

"Isn't that the one who gave you a hard time_ because_ we weren't married?" The Catholic Church still agreed to christen our kid, having no choice. But the priest who's known Bella since her own baptism…Well, he tried to talk to her, concerned, not knowing we were together. He tried to guide the seemingly single mother, who looks far too young _to be_ a mother. His heart was in the right place, I guess, but his overstepping was a bit rude, too. I'd promised Bella I'd tag along the next time she had to see him. It hasn't happened yet.

"Yeah," she yawned, glancing at the clock. "If we sleep now, I might get an hour or two. Hold me…" She wiggled her fingers for me.

I stared, a sense of longing filling me, at her pussy—the one I wanted to eat. "You sure?" I grinned, bending low to place a soft kiss down.

Bella squeaked and started giggling. "Rain check?"

I crawled behind her to gather her into my arms, draping my leg over hers to trap her. "Anytime, anywhere…"

She squirmed, trying as hard as she could to turn to me.

I wouldn't let her, squeezing her tightly.

"Edward…" She teased, scolding through a whisper.

"Fine." I eased up.

Bella wrapped her arms around me, nestling into my side. "This is better."

I nodded, looking over to Eddie.

He was still asleep, and we needed to take more advantage of that fact.

Soon, we drifted off to sleep, although I wasn't sure how much we'd get.


	117. Chapter 117

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 117**

I woke up to Bella giggling, which made me smile.

Though I hadn't opened my eyes just yet, I knew the sun was shining, and that it might be closer to noon than morning.

It was time to get up, but I didn't want to.

"Eddie Spaghetti with the meatball eyes," Bella began to sing. "Put him in the oven and you get French fries."

I chuckled, covering my face with the pillow. She wasn't crooning to me, instead serenading our son. But it took a long time for me to outrun that silly song as a kid. It followed me everywhere, and everyone called me Eddie Spaghetti.

"Sprinkle on the cheese, if you please!" she laughed. "Be careful with the pepper, 'cause you just might sneeze!" Bella was cracking up.

When I turned, she was bent over the bassinet, making his legs dance.

"You like when Momma sings?" She gasped, playing with the blanket, and I'd bet money Eddie was smiling wide, which is new. He's been smiling a lot more the past couple of days. He's all gums, and I love it. "Eddie Spaghetti with the meatball eyes. Put him in the oven and make French fries..." She trailed off, taking a quick peek at me. "Come look."

I was quick to follow her instructions, stand behind her and stare down at our son. Eddie was in his onesie—kicking his legs, his arms wide. His eyes were huge at the moment, now traveling over to me. "Good morning, li'l man." I grasped his teeny hand, marveling at how much of a grip he has. "I like when Mommy sings, too." I shared that secret.

Bella giggled. "Watch this." She bent even lower, grabbing his feet. "Eat him for breakfast. Eat him for lunch." She nibbled on his toes, making him smile again. "Every time you eat him, he goes crunch, crunch, crunch!" Bella pretended to really eat his leg, and then…

Eddie let out the smallest giggle.

It actually just sounded like he'd hiccupped a couple of times.

"Gas or real?" I asked, laughing myself. "Look at you…you're laughing now?" It was the most precious thing—ever.

Bella nodded. "I asked the doctor…all babies are different, but…two months is the standard."

I nodded, extremely proud. "He's advanced for his age."

He's closer to seven weeks than six, but I'd take it.

"You're gonna meet your grandma today, too?" she asked him, sounding very enthusiastic, but he didn't do anything.

I turned to look at the alarm clock, and it was actually twenty to one. "Baby…I should have left already—"

Bella stopped me, placing her hand on my chest. "Actually, I wanted to let you sleep." She lifted Eddie and brought him over to the bed. "I'm getting ready to go home—"

I sighed, sitting on the bed too. "What'd I miss? Fill me in." This happens more times than I'd like to admit—life happens while I'm sleeping.

Bella leaned over to kiss me. "After you check out the house, you'll come back here and get this bed."

I yawned, nodding. "And my mother?"

"Well…" Bella started to change Ed's diaper. "Mr. Colleoni came over this morning. He wanted to know how I was doing…He told me to let you sleep, said he'd take the ride with Vito to get your mom." She fastened the Velcro tabs. "He also said he'd talk to you later, and he assured me our house was ready for tonight."

"Tonight?" I raised a brow, giving Eddie my finger.

"You forgot?" she asked, though I knew what was going down tonight.

"No," I said. "I just figured . . ." We were hosting a dinner party, a small get-together Bella planned, wanting to make dinner for Carlisle and Esme as a thank you. "With my mother coming, I assumed it was canceled."

Bella giggled. "Your mom was the surprise…The dinner's for her, actually. She'll see some old friends, meet this little guy…" She bent low to nuzzle her nose to his forehead. "You'll get to see your mom."

I threw my head back to laugh, remembering the conversation I had with Colleoni last night. "Wait…Colleoni went to scoop her? From the airport?"

Bella shrugged. "What's the big deal? They know each other, right?"

"_Too_ well," I grumbled, and I didn't know how I felt about all that, to be honest. "Maybe you can make sense of this…" I furrowed my brow, staring to Bella.

"Hmmm?" She continued to dress Eddie.

I didn't want to bother her with that crap. "Nothing…I'll get ready to go. Lemme check out the house before you head over." I grabbed my boxers to pull them on. "Jazz here?" I figured he could help me move the bed.

"No," Bella said. "He's down at Sal's. He opened for you and is getting food ready for later."

"You're not cooking?" I asked.

"I am," she giggled, tickling Ed's ears. "But he's helping out."

"Oh…cool." I moseyed over to the bathroom to get ready for my day.


	118. Chapter 118

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 118**

**Bella POV**

Edward made quick work of going home and checking everything out. It was exactly as Colleoni promised—no rug but another coat of paint on the wall. That's it. The floors were hardwood, looked a little weathered, but I liked it. Every other surface was immaculate. It was almost as though nothing had transpired last night—not a thing.

With having fed our son at Jasper's, I got right to cooking. I should have started much earlier, but we did have a late start, and I enjoyed sitting at my brother's kitchen table with Alice, drinking coffee and gossiping. It was fun, like old times, only we had Little Eddie with us.

Just like he's doing now while Mommy cooks; this morning, he sat in his vibrating chair on top of the table. His eyes traveled everywhere, taking in every new sight. He's so aware for an infant, and I love it.

And as long as he's in his vibrating, bouncy chair, or in front of the television, he's fine—just sits there.

Sometimes he's too content, too quiet, and I have to stare to make sure he's okay.

The roast beef would need a few hours to cook, but I had a frozen tray of lasagna for our first course, which will be followed by the salad and appetizers Jasper's to bring over later.

Yesterday, before I'd even told Edward about his mom visiting, I'd gotten the spare room ready for a guest. There's not much in there furniture-wise, but there was a chest of drawers, and a TV on a stand. The room was spotless, and I placed extra blankets, pillows, and towels in the closet that's in there.

I wanted her to be as comfortable as possible—both nervous and excited for her arrival, needing things to be perfect as well.

Logically, since I know Edward, I know he's not going to be rude to her. Depending on how she acts toward him…he'll be cool. He's polite to everyone unless they give him a reason not to be. His mother should be no different, and I looked forward to seeing them interact.

Super nervous at the thought alone, anticipating Elizabeth's arrival—I walked around the downstairs to make sure everything was in order and not out of place.

Having Esme and Carlisle here was going to be nerve-racking too; it already was. Their house is so very glamorous; ours is nothing in comparison, but I'm proud of it.

The dining room needed to be set. That'd have to wait until Edward finishes moving the bed upstairs; he'll have to watch our son.

When the doorbell rang, I looked to the clock. There was no way they were back from the airport already, so I thought it might be Alice, or maybe Edward couldn't get to his keys.

No longer nervous, but on edge and a bit wary, I grabbed the revolver from my purse and took a look through the peephole. Seeing Rosalie on the other side of the door calmed me, and I opened the door wide for her.

"Hey!" She placed a bottle of wine in my hand as she walked into the foyer. "What's up with that?" She looked to the gun.

"Oh…" I placed it back into my purse and put the wine down. "You're here early." _Really early,_ I thought. Emmett lives right down the street while Rosalie still stays with her parents around the corner.

She nodded. "We were going to stop by Jasper's, but he's at Sal's, and Em won't hang around for girl talk." She rolled her eyes, leaning toward me. "Alice annoys him," she whispered. "Alice here, too? We never got to your brother's." Rosalie was more talkative than usual.

"No, not yet." I smiled, thinking about Alice last night. She was so excited to have Little Eddie and me there, she tried to keep us up all night. She truly adores her little nephew. And she'd said earlier that she needed a nap. I could so use one, too, but I knew that wasn't in the cards.

"We saw Edward trying to haul a bed by himself—and here we are." Rose turned to open the door again. "They were right behind me." Just as she spoke, we stood back while Edward and Emmett lugged a box spring upstairs.

"I figured we could hang out. I could help cook—" She gasped, sprinting into the kitchen. "My lover man!"

I giggled, watching her go ape-shit as she approached Little Eddie.

"I'll wash my hands…Can I hold him?" She turned to me.

"Of course. He's quiet now." I followed her into the kitchen. "But, sure." I knew he'd be the real hit at this dinner party.

Rosalie washed her hands as I started to peel the potatoes. Edward came in just to give me a smooch, and that made me beam at him.

Christ. We had the best sex this morning when he came home. It's only now—hours later—that I realized the mistake we'd made. So used to having sex while pregnant, I hadn't given much thought to…condoms, or making Edward pull out.

But what were the odds? That we'd get caught out there again?

I pushed those stupid thoughts out of my brain. I'm breastfeeding, which is supposed to be helpful in that way, a way of birth control. It's not foolproof, nor is it 100%, but it helps to shift the odds in our favor.

"Hey, Bella." Emmett leaned to kiss my cheek. "You look great." His eyes raked down my body, but his smile wasn't genuine, and after knowing him forever . . .

I know what I look like. Emmett didn't mean what he'd said, as my stomach doesn't look empty, more like there might still be a kid in there. Well, I'm exaggerating. My uterus has contracted, but I haven't lost all my weight—wearing my maternity clothes to boot, a long button-down shirt and a pair of spandex pants.

My old clothes don't fit me yet.

"Doesn't she?" Edward smiled, holding me close. "Gorgeous." He nipped at my jaw.

I smiled, glancing back to him. "I love you," I mouthed.

Edward winked, gently pinching my hip. "We'll be back—gotta get the mattress."

"Okay." I went back to my potatoes while they left the house.


	119. Chapter 119

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 119**

**Bella POV**

After I finished making the bed for Elizabeth, I sprayed air freshener. Then I gazed at the room from the doorway, wanting a different view—new eyes—wondering what it'd look like as an outsider looking in.

"It's great, Bella," Edward called from our bedroom.

I smiled, still standing in the hall. "I just want—"

"You want it _perfect_," he drawled, chuckling and throwing clothes onto our bed. "It's fine. No worries."

I walked to meet him, but then he turned to leave the room, going for the bathroom. "You're changing?"

He turned on the shower. "I'm stinky—haven't showered since yesterday morning. Then last night, us fucking." He wiggled his brows. "That was fan-fucking-tastic. Woot!"

"It was," I agreed, and I had to tear my eyes away. Even seeing Edward shirtless gets me going.

He sniffed his pits and hooted again. "Yeah, I'm stinky."

"You are not."

He pulled my hand and then hugged me tight. "Did my mother's flight land on time?" He kissed my hair.

"As far as I know…I gave Mr. Colleoni the information. He said he'd square it away. I haven't called to check." I blew out a breath. "They should be here _any_ minute."

"They should'a been here a half-hour ago." He stepped away to get undressed, leaving his dirty clothes on the floor.

I know he'll pick them up after, but just in case, I gathered them into my arms. "You think I look okay?"

Edward poked his head out. "You look fine—beautiful as always."

"But—"

"We're home—not going anywhere." He lathered himself up. "Everyone's wearing jeans…except for Esme who might show up in an evening gown," Edward guffawed. "Christ, that's going to be awkward. I'd hate to be Colleoni later on."

"What?" I asked.

He waved a hand. "After everyone leaves, I'll fill you in—promise. It's a crazy story. I don't even know how I feel about it. Maybe you can make sense of it."

Curious, I stepped closer. "Well, what's up? Tell me."

"Before my parents hooked up, and it was literally a hook-up, Colleoni was with my mother." He stared at me expectantly.

"Just like…I don't know. We're a small, close-knit neighborhood. I know Colleoni has lived here all his life, all our parents have." I tried to shrug it off as nothing, so he wouldn't be upset.

Edward seemed torn about it.

"You never know. My mom might have dated your dad way back when," I laughed. "They all went to the same schools, hung out with the same people . . ." And I only knew that because Esme told me. She's originally from Chicago, but she moved here when she was young—admitted to knowing both my parents, although she didn't know them well enough to actually tell me about them.

"It's more than that…I'll break it down later."

I smiled. "I have a pair of jeans that fit." Again, they're maternity, but they work. "Your mom—"

"She's…down to earth, all right?" Edward grinned at me, rubbing shampoo into his hair. "She wears those leggings things, too—jeans." He shrugged. "I haven't seen her in years, but she was never rolling in dough."

"Oh," I said, and I still felt self-conscious, wanting to make a good impression.

I don't want her to think her son's marrying some slob, some chubby little girl who wears rags.

No matter how glamorous Esme is, she knows me—knows I just had a baby, knows I'm not into dressing up too tough, that I spend most of my time at home. She doesn't judge me, but when you meet someone for the first time . . .

"You're worrying over nothing," Edward laughed, but I wished he had more reassuring things to say.

"You're not nervous? You haven't seen her in years."

"It's been three." He wouldn't meet my gaze. "I visited once—for a week between deployments. She was…she was doing okay. I don't know. Bella, we're not crazy close, but we're close enough. She'll be happy to be here—to see me, meet you and Ed. Don't worry."

"Okay." I took a deep breath. "I should go relieve Rosalie." I jerked a thumb.

"I'll be down soon." He blew me a kiss.

I blew one back before I stuffed his clothes into the hamper.

Rosalie and Emmett still sat at the table, admiring Little Eddie in his seat. He spit up a little bit on Rose, and that was that. She handed him over real quick. My friend doesn't do vomit, not even baby vomit. Hell, I wear vomit every day like a corsage these days.

After I checked on the roast, I dumped the boiled potatoes into the strainer. Then I started doing what I had to mash them—make the mashed potatoes. Apparently, I was boring Rosalie and Emmett, and they left to watch TV in the living room.

While I continued mashing, I smiled wide at Little Eddie who was watching me from the table—his eyes precisely following my movements. "Where's Mommy's baby boy?" I crooned from afar, but then I saw the saddest thing...ever.

His gaze fell and his chin wrinkled, his lip quivered, and I knew he was about to wail.

Sighing, I looked to the clock, knowing it was a little early for his next bottle, but he might be hungry already—since he puked, since that was his cry of hunger.

"Hang on, baby," I said, running the water to wash my hands.

That's when he started—tiny whimpers that build until he's screaming, but I scrambled to get to him before that happened.

And before I lactated.

"Shhh. It's okay. Mommy's here. Mommy knows." I planted my lips in his hair, rocking him slowly as I grabbed his bottle from the fridge.

After placing it in the warmer, I rocked him some more, hoping to calm him before . . .

When I felt the wetness seeping into my shirt, I paused to grimace.

_But that's the breaks. _

And that's when Eddie finally calmed a bit.

"You don't use a pacifier?" Rose asked, was suddenly in the kitchen again.

I shook my head. "He never cared for it. I tried—" When Eddie started wailing once more, I tested his bottle that was still cold. "Few more minutes." I shifted him, so he was half perched on my shoulder, and I supported his neck. If Eddie has pretty scenery to look at, it calms him, too.

"Oh, look at those eyes…They're huge." Rosalie was behind me. "He has Edward's eyes."

"Yeah," I giggled, leaning my head to the side, to his back. "This is Eddie Spaghetti with the meatball eyes."

"No, meatball eyes. I no have meatball eyes. You say, 'Momma, I haz booty-ful eyes'," she spoke like a baby.

I laughed, testing the bottle that was just warm enough. "Okay, you…" I cradled him in my arms again.

"Can I feed him?" Rose grabbed a burp rag. "I'm equipped this time."

Wearing the smile I can't seem to wipe off, I eased Eddie into her waiting arms. "You can sit on the couch with him."

Rose beamed as Eddie anxiously sucked on the nipple—gulping his formula down.

"Burp him every few ounces."

Rose nodded like she heard me.

I huffed a breath, leaning back against the kitchen counter.

Then I looked down to my shirt.

Dammit. Now I _had to_ change.

But I decided to finish the mashed potatoes first.

I sent a text to Jasper, making sure he'd be here with Alice and the food soon, and then I placed the lasagna in the oven.

Edward had just made it downstairs when I passed him by the landing. He smirked as he stared at my shirt, and I pushed his bicep. At the same time, the doorbell rang.

Edward went for the door, and I ran like a motherfucker upstairs—to hide my tits. It was a good call since I heard a female squeal and Edward laugh. Knowing it wasn't Alice or Esme, I smiled, wishing I could have been there when Edward greeted his mother for the first time.

Nevertheless, I made quick work of changing—replacing my nursing bra with a dry one and throwing on another shirt like the one I'd been wearing.

After checking out my hair and brushing it, I applied more Chap Stick and pinched my cheeks to give them color.

Then I scoffed at myself in the mirror.

I either had to shed this weight or buy new clothes.

I just didn't know when I'd have the time. Since this is such a small community, most of its occupants being Catholic, I'm not supposed to leave the house—go anywhere with Eddie until after the christening. The other day, I managed to slip out when Edward came home early. I needed to get an outfit for Sunday. Esme and Alice were going, so I tagged along with them.

It's not like I have a car, or a fucking driver's license either. Hopefully, sometime in the future, I'll have time to slip out and hit the Avenue—buy a few shirts and maybe a couple pairs of jeans.

When I left our bedroom, I was surprised to see Edward in the hall.

"What's up?" I asked.

He looked torn once more. Edward looked happy but troubled by something. "That's not my mother," he whispered, pointing to the stairs.

Now I was confused. "Um…" I didn't know if he meant there was a literal stranger in our living room, or…

He sighed, collapsing onto our bed. "You said she sounded good, and the last time I saw her she was okay…on meds again. I knew she'd be on the Lithium or the Prozac, but how much is she on?" Edward gazed at the ceiling. "It's like she had that brain surgery…lobotomy, electric shock treatments."

"Maybe she's happy to see you?" I walked closer and grabbed his hand.

Edward disagreed. "Colleoni spoke to me last night. He told me a bunch of shit. I mean, I didn't know what to expect with her coming here after what he'd told me."

"What did he tell you?" I asked.

"I told you…He was with my mother before my father. He was…He said he loved her, and they're all smiling downstairs, have those goo-goo eyes." He furrowed his brow. "What the fuck _is_ this?" Edward spoke with his hands.

"Shhh." I didn't want anyone to hear him. "You said Elizabeth suffered from depression, she's an alcoholic…But she's not drinking, is on her meds, and she seems happy…?" I hedged.

"Yeah." He still had an attitude.

I pursed my lips, not understanding the issue. "You're _upset_ about that…?"

"I don't know," he whispered, his eyes falling to the floor. Then he groaned as he stood up to hug me. "Let's go downstairs." He placed a kiss on my forehead before leaving the room. "We, uh…" He turned, making me stop short in the hall. "We just…you and me have a lot to discuss. We gotta talk, and I've been wanting to since I got up." He brought his voice down to a whisper. "Let's feed these fuckers, and…" He pushed his hair back.

When his hand came down, I grabbed it, truly concerned now—frightened. "What's going on?" It seems like as soon as things calm down, and we're happy, something else happens.

"It's not bad." He bent low, his lips gently lingered on my own. "Baby, it's not bad. Okay? Let's just have dinner…Elizabeth settles in, we…I'm not going anywhere tonight." He pointed to himself, and I was happy he'd be here. "We put Ed to bed and then we talk." Edward seemed so unsure, and that killed me. He's always put-together, always has the answers.

"Whatever it is…we'll figure it out." I reached up to palm his cheek. "Don't worry. Your mom's here…our whole family is here, basically, what we have of a family. Jasper and Alice will be here soon…" I was rambling, hoping my words would ease his mind.

He groaned and palmed his face. "Fucking Esme'll be here, too. I really wish I knew what I found out last night, before today…that's all." He landed another smooch in my hair. "I'm not mad. Thanks for hosting this…I don't know what's going to happen. This is just fucking weird." Edward was working himself up again. "I never had a family…well, I did, and then…I was carted off to Washington. It's like…" He looked away from me. "Never mind."

"No." I grabbed him before he could skulk off. "Talk to me."

Edward paused before he answered me as we heard more squeals come from downstairs. "As a kid, my father being my only real family, we were always with the Colleonis…Then I'd be with you," he palmed my cheek "—Jasper, and Grams. Then, it all changed. I had no one except that black hole downstairs." He shook his head. "I got used to it, coped, accepted it…before I ran away. My life in the Marines, well, I was by myself which was fine. Then I come back here…You." He kissed me deep, making the butterflies appear in my belly. "I'm with you and Jazz again…Things felt right. I met up with them again…" He tilted his head toward the steps. "I do what I do and now we have Eddie. You and Eddie, you're my family, Jazz too. Having everyone…from all…three lives here under one roof…What the fuck, Bella?"

Still, even though I understood what he was saying, I couldn't see it as a bad thing.

"You don't know everything. Let's see how this goes." He squeezed my hip and then trailed down the stairs.

He says he's never had a family, but he's had more people to love him in his life than I did. Edward had fourteen years with his dad. Then, he was able to be with his mother until he left on his own.

As someone who never had parents, only a grandmother and a brother and a couple close friends—I loved the idea of having a house full of people.

Sure, I'm nervous with meeting Elizabeth. The way Edward described her, I thought we'd be hosting dinner for Morticia Adams, Elvira, some doomy, gloomy character.

But she was none of those things—not by looks alone.

When I came around the landing, my eyes found her fast. Elizabeth was on the couch, sitting next to Mr. Colleoni with Little Eddie in her arms, and Edward had just joined them.

She had waves of wild, reddish hair trailing over her shoulder, wore jeans and a plain button-down shirt. We kind of matched, and I found that odd. Even though she was sitting, I could tell she was petite and slender.

"Um…" Edward cleared his throat, opening his arm for me. "Mom…?" That didn't sound like a word Edward used often for her. "This is Bella."

I don't know why I pinched my cheeks. Within a split second—with her large brown eyes meeting mine—I blushed scarlet while I gave her a small wave.

Elizabeth was still smiling wide while she handed Eddie over to Mr. Colleoni. My first instinct was to be concerned for my son, stare and make sure Alice's dad held him correctly. Before I could do anything, Elizabeth wrapped her arms around me. She hugged me tight and then leaned away to palm my cheeks. She didn't smell like booze, but her scent was something I recognized yet couldn't place. It wasn't perfume, something earthy?

"Christ on a cracker…" She stared at me. "You look…just like her." Her eyes filled with tears and she bit her lips together.

Feeling awkward, I tried to keep smiling. "It's lovely to finally meet you," I said. Elizabeth was about my height, fit, and she didn't look old enough to have a son Edward's age. In fact, Edward is so massive, I couldn't imagine that someone so tiny could have given birth to him.

When she pulled me into her arms again, I looked to Edward, wondering…

"She knew your mother." Edward gestured to his own.

Elizabeth pulled away to place my hair behind my ears. "I'm sorry. Renee was a very dear friend. She meant the world to me."

"Oh." I nodded. "You knew my parents well?" Curious as all hell, I hoped we could get to talking in the future, no matter how awkward I felt in this moment.

She chuckled, staring back to Mr. Colleoni. "Yes, I knew them both. Carlo and Renee…" She sighed, turning back to me. "He's beautiful. Looks just like his father." She walked over to Edward and nestled into his side. He draped his arm over her, uncomfortable. "I'm too young to be a grandma," she giggled up to Edward. "I'm happy for you, though…" Her eyes danced around the room. "You have a family…a life."

Edward sniffed. "What'd you bathe in patchouli?"

Elizabeth slapped his chest. "Don't be an ass." She walked over to the coffee table to grab her purse. "Where's the smoking section?"

Edward pointed to the backyard, and Mr. Colleoni left the couch to hand me Eddie.

No more words were exchanged before they left out the back door. I could see Emmett and Rosalie were already sitting on the porch, cigarettes in hand.

"See what I mean?" Edward asked. "Weird."

I opened my mouth to agree and disagree. Elizabeth was a stranger to me, but I still hoped for the best, and she wasn't Miss Doomsday.

Then the doorbell rang, I knew it was Jasper, Alice, and Esme.

Edward paused in the foyer.

"Want me to get it?" I pointed.

He shook his head. "Gimme Eddie." He grabbed our son from me. "You get dinner on the table. Go." Edward gave me a nudge toward the kitchen.

"Okay…" I huffed.


	120. Chapter 120

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 120**

**Bella POV**

The first thing I did was check on the oven. Dinner would be ready soon. While I started to set up the dining room, Jasper came in with a couple of trays from Sal's. He kissed my cheek and helped me, and he seemed to be on edge, too.

"You okay?" I asked.

Jasper looked around and then dug into his pocket. "I made the last payment—picked it up this morning." He showed me a ring box, quick to open it. "What do you think?"

I grinned, happy for him, for Alice… "She's going to love it." It was a princess cut solitaire, similar to mine but not as huge. Alice adored my ring, gushed over it, so my brother had an idea of what she'd want.

"Everyone's here…I'm thinking of asking her during dinner."

"Oh…tonight?" I asked, placing the last plate down. With tensions so high, I wasn't sure that was a good idea. "Why not in private? Take her out this weekend."

Jasper let out a large breath. "Her father gave me his blessing, said to propose in front of him and Esme. I just figured…"

I shrugged. "Then, do it."

He waved a finger. "Don't tell her." Then his face lit up. "I'm nervous."

"Don't be." I squeezed his hand. "Alice is…fuck-nut crazy about you." Secretly obsessed with him for years is more like it. Maybe my friend didn't have as much drama as me. But she tried to no avail for a long time to get his attention, and I've never seen my brother this happy.

He nodded, looking to the table. "Looks good. How's dinner? You need help?"

"Nope. It'll be ready soon. Where's Alice and Esme?"

He quirked a brow. "Alice ran out to talk to Rose. Esme…is probably looking for your corkscrew. She brought her own wine with her."

My stomach tied in knots. I hadn't given much thought to having wine with dinner—there being alcohol. "Edward's mom is in the back." I jerked my thumb.

Jasper didn't see my concern.

"She's not drinking when she used to…I think she was an alcoholic," I whispered. "Edward didn't put it that way, but…"

"Yeah, she was," Jasper said. "Don't worry about it. There's soda, plenty she'll have to drink."

I shook my head. "You're not—"

"I get it," he assured me. "Just leave it alone. It's not your place. Let Edward handle it however he sees fit. You can't control what people wanna drink, and if his mom can't handle being around a little wine…I don't know. If you make it an issue, it'll be an issue. Leave it alone." He poked my nose.

"Okay," I agreed. "Wanna call everyone in?"

"Sure." He left the room.

I followed, heading back into the kitchen.

Esme sat the counter. She found a wine glass, had opened her bottle, and she was trying to stare out the back door. "She's here?" was the first thing she'd said to me.

"Elizabeth?" I smiled, kissing her cheek. "Yeah, they got back a little while ago."

Esme didn't seem happy about it. "Right." She sipped her wine and then grabbed the newspaper to skim through it.

I checked the oven once more while everyone filed back into the house.

Emmett flanked Jasper, and they led others into the dining room.

Mr. Colleoni landed a smooch in Esme's hair, whispering something in her ear, and Elizabeth was the last to enter. She closed the door slowly, and I was stuck—just watching, just wondering what might happen. I didn't know the whole story, but there was enough tension between the three of them to tell me…it was a good story, filled with gossip and intrigue.

I was hiding, not sure who could see me.

"Elizabeth!" Esme shocked me by leaving the stool, ecstatic to see Elizabeth. "How are you?"

They hugged but Elizabeth didn't seem too happy to see her, pulling away fast. "You told her to play nice?" She faced Mr. Colleoni. "Well…" She gave Esme's bicep a sympathetic pat. "How ya been?"

Mr. Colleoni just laughed, standing off to the side, finishing off what was left in Esme's glass.

"I've been fantastic." Esme checked her out, her eyes going from Elizabeth's feet to her face. "You look good."

Elizabeth smiled, backing into the kitchen. "I've been lucky to age gracefully. Did you have some work done?" She twirled a circle, indicating Esme's face. Then she turned to me, so I wasn't forgotten or hidden at all. "Can I help with anything?"

I shook my head. "No…everything's set." I spoke to all three. "You guys can go on into the dining room."

"Food's here?" Mr. Colleoni patted his stomach. "That's where I'll be." He left.

Esme took her stool again to refill her glass.

Elizabeth just stood there, expectant, waiting for me to say more—something, anything.

I had no idea what to talk about.

"Bella, did you ever think about redoing this kitchen?" Esme broke the silence.

"Um…no." I liked my kitchen. It was almost an exact replica of Jasper's kitchen, Gram's kitchen.

"It wouldn't be too expensive to bring it into this century." Esme gazed around the room. "It's never been redone," she laughed, focusing on the kitchen counter. "This Formica, the design, it's from the 60s. So old."

"So old," Elizabeth repeated. "I thought the same when I saw your face."

"Oh." I covered my mouth fast and tried to recover. The oddest thing was that Esme didn't even have a reply—no punches were thrown, nothing. "I, um, I never gave it much thought…redoing the kitchen. It's not that we don't have the money." I didn't want Esme to think it was because of that either. Just because I'm happy with my kitchen, didn't mean I didn't want to fit in—join the club Edward was a member of.

"Your kitchen is beautiful." Elizabeth opened the oven to lift the tinfoil off the lasagna. "Needs a couple more minutes."

I nodded, turning back to Esme. "Can I get you anything?" I wished Edward would come and save me, or make them go sit at the table.

"I'm perfect." She smiled. "If you ever wanna redecorate, you know who to call." Esme winked at me.

"Thanks," I sighed. "Appetizers and salad—it's out. In the dining room."

"Come on." Elizabeth tilted her head, instructing Esme to follow. "We're making the poor girl uncomfortable."

"Oh, no." I wanted to deny it.

Elizabeth cocked an eyebrow at me, making a face Edward often does, which made me smile. "Don't forget your bottle," she told Esme.

The odd pair left my kitchen, and I breathed another sigh of relief.

Edward passed them in the hall, gliding along the wall to get around them. "Enjoy," he muttered and then raced to stand by my side.

"You all right?" I asked.

He gave me that same shifty-eyed, cocked brow, reaching into the cabinet above the fridge. "I need a fuckin' drink."

"Edward…" I kept my tone low.

He didn't answer, taking a swig from his bottle and tossing something onto the counter.

I lifted the chip with the unfamiliar design.

"She gave me that—it's from AA. She's got two years sober."

"And you're toasting to that with Jack Daniel's?" I tapped the bottle.

He took another sip and then put the cap on.

"Where's Eddie?" I asked.

"In there, with them…They're eating, talking, passing him around. He's like a human peace pipe. I dunno," he grumbled. "It's not too bad?"

"Not even a little bit," I said, and I wouldn't be mentioning what happened minutes prior.

"Elizabeth apologized." He nodded. "It was very short. She told me she was sorry—shit was fucked, and to get over the past, talking about how my life is wonderful now. She's right. I just…don't know who that is. I'm glad she's taking her medication, she's not drinking…Even when she was on the straight and narrow back then…" He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. "She told me it'd be hypocritical to try and be my mother now, but she wants to be friends."

I rubbed his arm. "What do you want?"

He shrugged, a slight shake to his head. "I cut my losses a while ago. Learning what I did last night, it helped make sense of her behavior, why she was the way she was. I always thought…I was a burden. It still seems that way, but..." He pulled me into his arms. "Let's just get through the weekend."

"Okay." My heart broke for him. A part of me wanted him to embrace his mother, and another didn't want me to see him hurt.

"Let's eat." He grasped my hand.

I gestured to the oven.

"So, come set a plate. Eat and then check shit out." He wouldn't let go of my hand.

"All right," I agreed.

* * *

**Thank you for reading. **

**I'll be updating again soon. **

**I promise. **


	121. Chapter 121

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 121**

**Bella POV**

After we had appetizers and salad, I brought out the main course. Conversations continued to flow, the younger generation laughing and smiling. Eddie was still taking turns being in everyone's arms, which was okay, I guess. I wanted to grab his chair, let him chill out and let others eat, but he didn't need a chair. No one seemed to mind.

"Uh, Bella…" Jasper stood up, had Eddie in his arms. "He needs a diaper change."

I wiped my mouth, about to take him, but then Edward beat me to it.

"I got it. You eat." He grabbed Eddie from Jasper.

"You change diapers?" Mr. Colleoni asked him.

Edward furrowed his brow. "My kid's got shit in his ass, I'mma change him. Yeah."

"We didn't do that in my day." Mr. Colleoni sipped his wine.

"I'll do it," I told Edward.

He gently squeezed the back of my neck, which sent tingles everywhere. "I said I got it."

I settled down, tucking into my plate again.

"I didn't mean nothin' by it. Good for him," Mr. Colleoni told me.

I smiled at him.

"I'm glad he helps you." Elizabeth placed her hand on my arm.

"He's very helpful," I said. "We do things together when he's home."

There was pity or something in her gaze now as she tapped my arm. "I bet he's out a lot, but you have your brother and your friends—a great support system. That's so important."

Esme scoffed at her words.

"Something you wanna share?" Mr. Colleoni asked his missus, and the whole table quieted down.

"No." Esme went back to her food.

"That's right." Elizabeth snapped her fingers. "Wives are to be seen and not heard." She lifted her glass of water to toast to that. "Isabella can learn _a lot _from you."

"I don't know what you're implying, or what you think you know—" Esme rushed out.

Mr. Colleoni lifted a hand to silence her.

Esme stared at her husband, hate in her glare.

Jasper, maybe wanting to cut the tension in half, stood from his chair again. "I'm glad we could all get together this evening."

I wondered why he wasn't waiting for Edward.

"Shhh." Esme didn't face him, putting her palm out much like her husband just did. "You're going to let her talk to me that way?" she asked.

Elizabeth snickered beside me, very low under her breath.

Mr. Colleoni had stopped eating, pausing his movements but staring down to his plate.

"I don't give a fuck what's she been through. The fucking past…" Esme shouted.

Mr. Colleoni banged his fist down. "Enough." It was a whisper.

"You want me to be nice? Well, fuck that!" Esme faced Elizabeth, pouring herself some more wine. "You bring up Ed, and I'm supposed to feel sorry for your old goomah? I don't think so."

The table was stunned to silence again.

And _again_, I wondered what was taking Edward so long.

"Everyone knew the kinda man Ed was. If she couldn't handle the consequences, she should'a kept her legs closed!" Esme nodded. "I don't feel bad for you," she told Elizabeth. "I despise you!"

I looked to Alice, and she looked proud of her mother—not aghast like everyone else.

"Despise me?" Elizabeth shouted. "Fuck you! It ain't my fault you couldn't keep your husband home. He loved _me_. He wanted to be _with me!_ And he was, quite often." She shrugged, still smiling. "You were FedEx'ed from Chicago…Youse had a beautiful wedding, and I bet a lovely honeymoon. Congrats. I never said that. Congratulations."

A giggle escaped her. "You got your mansion and your ruby slippers, all the money in the world from your husband to buy yourself happiness…ladies' luncheons to gossip about trash, family dinners…the politics and hypocrisy of being a part of that world. Youse had two kids, so I'm guessing he's fucked you _at least_ twice," she sighed. "I actually feel sorry for you, Esme. No life is perfect. Mine wasn't. I've made mistakes. I've fucked up royally—"

"He's my husband! You just stay away from him! I don't give a fuck about all you just said—"

"Yes." Elizabeth nodded, agreeing with her. "He's _your_ husband. A lot has changed. Despite hardships and what not, once Ed and I were married…I may not have been the blushing bride, but I respected those vows—"

"Ed sure didn't," Esme muttered.

"That was Ed…" She stared down to her plate. "But I left…I didn't fight you for him. I didn't want him." She gestured to Mr. Colleoni. "You wanna know the truth? _He_ wouldn't let me go. I was sick of…everything. I knew the only way he'd back off…I knew he wouldn't want me after I boffed Ed." Elizabeth turned to Mr. Colleoni. "Right, Carlisle?"

He didn't answer her. "We're ruining Isabella's dinner party with ghosts of the past. We should enjoy our delicious meals—"

"Oh, please!" Esme laughed. "The late-night phone calls, you calling, fucking crying all the time…and he'd run. He'd run to save Lizzie, and I thought that would stop after you married Ed—"

"That's not true." Elizabeth's gaze whipped between Mr. Colleoni and Esme. "I was a kid—"

"_He_ didn't _chase_ you!_ You_ chased him!" Esme was angry again.

"Is that what he told you? That I'd call crying? Well, before I married Ed, I never did." Elizabeth waved a hand.

"Ladies," Mr. Colleoni warned.

"No…I want it out." Elizabeth nodded. "Esme, I never chased your _piece-of-shit_ husband. I couldn't get rid of him. I wanted to go to college, but the next thing I know—"

"Lizzie…" Mr. Colleoni's tone was nearly pleading now.

Elizabeth had tears in her eyes. "I tried…I tried to leave Brooklyn more than a dozen times. First, Carlisle would stop me…Then, it was Ed's turn. I never chased after _your_ husband, Esme. He was my boyfriend, and things were good. Things were _great_ between us." She wiped her tears. "We were supposed to get married…that didn't happen. He married you, and I never—_never_—" she faced Mr. Colleoni "—wanted to see him again. But, I didn't have that luxury, did I, Carlisle?"

Mr. Colleoni produced a cigar from his jacket and left the table.

By this time, I was glad Edward had disappeared with Eddie. I was happy he didn't have to hear any of that.

"I don't dislike you because you got Carlisle in the end," Elizabeth explained. "I was in a situation, but you and everyone else…No one made it easy, and Ed was a part of the club."

"Youse were both pawns!" Alice shouted, and everyone turned to her. "You're women! You're mommas and fucking housekeepers, bed-warmers. As women, and in the family we're in, we come second to men. The men are loyal to each other, but you think they'd be loyal to the women they're with?" She scoffed, finishing off her own wine. "Marriage is bullshit!" She stormed from the table.

"Alice!" Jasper went for her.

Esme left the table. "I got it."

Jasper sat back down at a loss, and Esme went after her daughter—Alice, who'd just heard an earful.

"Where's Edward?" Elizabeth asked me. "I wish he could have heard all that—the truth, but maybe it's best he didn't."

I rose from my chair. "I'll go check."

"I'm sorry I ruined your dinner," she told me.

I gave her a tight-lipped smile.

"Ruined?" Emmett asked. "It's not ruined." He fucking winked at her, that pig. "Family get-togethers are hard on everyone, tensions are high…"

Rosalie nodded beside him.

"Oh…well, now I feel welcome." Elizabeth's tone was sarcastic as she placed her napkin over her dish.

When I walked past the back door, I saw Mr. Colleoni puffing on a cigar while Esme and Alice spoke a few feet away from him.

I rushed to get upstairs since Edward and Eddie weren't in the living room.

Our bedroom door was closed, and I tiptoed inside. They were asleep. Eddie slept on Edward's chest, and I heard Edward's light snore. He had the right idea to slip away.

"Hey," I whispered, placing a kiss on his cheek.

His lids opened with a flutter, and he smiled. "Everyone left?"

I giggled because he's cute. "No, but I think they might be going soon. You might wanna go down and say goodbye."

He hummed, sitting up slowly and trying not to jostle Eddie. "He fell right out. Everyone must have made him tired…I dunno."

"He'll be up soon." I wiped Eddie's drool off Edward's shoulder. "It's almost time for a bottle."

Edward carefully walked out of our bedroom.

I followed him into the nursery.

"I know he naps downstairs…"

"We can turn on the monitor," I said, knowing that if he's woken up by strange voices, he'll be cranky as all hell. "He'll wake up in about…a half-hour."

Edward smiled at me. "I love how you _just know_."

I shrugged. "It's what I do…"

He pulled me out of Ed's room and shut the door. "How'd it go?"

"It went…" I didn't know how to explain, or if I should.

Edward hummed, wrapping his arms around me. "I love you."

"I love you." I fisted his shirt, pulling him down for a kiss.


	122. Chapter 122

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 122**

**Bella POV**

After everyone left, Edward and I cleaned up from dinner. Elizabeth helped but she didn't say anything…about anything. No one uttered a word about what'd happened during dinner.

Everybody expressed their thanks for dinner, and that was it.

Once I showed Elizabeth to her room, I went to get Eddie from his crib. He'd been awake for an hour, Edward gave him his bottle, and now I just wanted to wipe him down and change him before I put his pajamas on.

Our son easily made me forget the tension, the words shared—that whole mess.

But I knew that wasn't over.

It was around nine when Eddie dozed off again, but I didn't put him in the nursery.

Since we had a guest, I placed the bassinet in our bedroom, so Elizabeth wouldn't be disturbed.

Edward told me I was being silly, but when I also reminded him of last night…just how uneasy I felt, he relented.

We hadn't had the chance to do anything—change the locks, nothing.

Edward placed a machete under our bed, and he kept his gun close as we got ready for bed ourselves.

I was beat and it didn't matter how early it was.

By the time I eased under the covers, it was closer to eleven, and that's when Edward started talking.

He told a different version of the same events. Mr. Colleoni didn't lie to him, judging by what Elizabeth and Esme spoke about. But in his version, Mr. Colleoni was a hero? The nice guy for helping Elizabeth escape Edward's father? Sending Elizabeth pictures and keeping in touch, helping her.

Mr. Colleoni didn't lie. He just painted himself as a savior in the end? And maybe he was. Maybe he wanted to make up for…what happened? I didn't know.

What Elizabeth said made a lot of sense. She'd only slept with Edward Sr. thinking and knowing Carlisle wouldn't want her afterward.

And, apparently, she got the end result she wanted.

Carlisle stayed away from her, but then she was pregnant, and she had to marry Edward's father.

There was a lot of truth to Alice's outburst as well.

Edward Sr. and Carlisle grew up and lived in the lifestyle. Their politics didn't exactly allow them to love, or learn of such things. The different women, and I bet there were plenty after Elizabeth left, were inconsequential and interchangeable—good for one thing.

Edward couldn't understand how Mr. Colleoni could _just accept_ that his father slept with Elizabeth.

But I could.

If Mr. Colleoni chased Elizabeth, like she'd said, I bet he was really hurt. But, by the laws under which they lived, Elizabeth being unimportant in the grand scheme of things, he was able to look past it.

I explained that, and Edward saw my point.

He owed Jasper for opening today and told me to wake him up early.

"Don't hide down there all day…unless, you know, you have other things to do," I said, thinking he might try to avoid his mother.

Edward gathered me into his arms. "We were supposed to talk to a priest today." He kissed down my neck, giving the waistband of my sweats a slight push.

"We'll get to it." I moved my hair, so his lips could travel—his kisses making my hips squirm.

"You know what else I've wanted to do?" he whispered, pushing my shirt up.

I hummed, hugging his head close.

Edward didn't answer. He nudged me onto my back and left me to pull my pants away.

"Your mom's here." I practically mouthed.

"You didn't say nothin' last night—being in Jazz's house." He went for my panties.

I placed my hands on his. "I didn't think about that. Not at the time."

Edward yanked my underwear away from my legs. "You can be quiet."

I munched on my lip, wondering if Elizabeth was asleep or not. "What if—"

Edward pushed my legs apart. "Shut up and lemme eat your pussy…I had a long day. This is _all_ I want."

My body stiffened when he touched me, going right for the prize—quick to twirl his finger around my clit.

"Just relax…breathe and don't scream," he crooned. "We don't wanna wake up the kid, neither."

I licked my lips and nodded, watching him get rid of his boxers before lying on his stomach. He was slow at first, taking his time and placing soft kisses on my thighs. But then he opened me up to lick and groan, the sound filling my belly with anticipation.

When he sucked my clit and inserted a finger, I grabbed a pillow to moan into. But then I sat up to watch the master at work, weaving my fingers into his hair. I felt myself close, my chest heaving, my hips moving to match each stroke of his tongue.

I stiffened when I came, and he kept going, while I tried to ride it out—breathe through it and not make a sound.

I was still panting as he kissed his way up my body, keeping my legs spread with his knees.

Soaked, there was no resistance when I felt him at my entrance. He buried himself deep, only to pull back and thrust harder before he picked up a steady rhythm.

I moved to meet him, our momentum building and building.

His hands that roamed, his cock—fucking Edward.

I was close, and he muffled my cry of pleasure with his mouth, muting my moan.

He kissed me deep, groaning, and pushing even farther into me to come undone.

Then he stilled, resting his forehead to my shoulder. "That sucked."

Alarmed, I leaned back to look at him. "What?"

Edward rolled onto his back. "I didn't…" He laughed, but I didn't know what was funny. "Sorry I came so fast." He lifted my hand to kiss my knuckles. "I can…" He moved to get between my legs again.

"Hey…" I palmed his cheeks. "That was great." I thought it was phenomenal, amazing.

_It always is with Edward._

He sniffled, wiping sweat from his forehead and sitting back on his calves. "Gimme a sec." Edward grabbed his cock and started to pull…

For a second, I stared, mesmerized and very interested in what he was doing, but… "Stop," I said, sitting up to face him. "Edward, it was wonderful…I don't know what you're talking about."

He sucked his teeth and lied to my side. "I ain't no two-minute fucker."

"I know that," I whispered. "But it wasn't two minutes…it was like ten. What's the big deal?"

He shook his head, obviously upset.

I grabbed my sweats to slip them on. "If I did something wrong…I'm sorry. Tell me. I won't do it again, or...I'm sorry. I..." I didn't know what else to say since I always thought our sex—when we have sex—I see stars, but maybe he doesn't.

"You were fuckin' great, baby. _You_ didn't do anything wrong. Maybe you…maybe it was_ too_ right." He grinned at me. "When you came that second time, I tried…_you_ made me come. I dunno. You're fantastic." He grasped my hand to pull me into his side. "You're just…different now."

I stiffened, afraid of what he meant.

"In a good way." He rushed out. "Being with you has always been amazing, but you're…more comfortable? More confident now? You're fucking me like a damn porn star. You're sexier."

"Oh." I smiled into his armpit.

Edward and I had our ups and downs. Given my past, he's always walked on eggshells with me, wary he'd do something wrong. Sex while pregnant—sometimes it was good, and other times it was…eh. I'd show up, show enthusiasm whenever he wanted to fuck, and I'd usually enjoy myself.

Now that I had my body back, now that things have settled a bit…

No one ever taught me about sex—the dos and don'ts.

Early this morning, and then just now, and even while pregnant, I'd do what felt good.

We're happy and in love…

"Comfortable," I said. "Yeah, I'm comfortable with you, and I just do…" I didn't know how I could explain myself to Edward. "I spent so long being afraid of sex…and then being with you that first time…It was different, wasn't like what I'd experienced before. Now…You feel good. Everything you do feels amazing. I love you."

Edward squashed me to his side, placing a kiss on my forehead. "I love you, too. Let's go to sleep."

I wanted to settle down and close my eyes, but I had to pee.

After sneaking out of bed, I lingered by Elizabeth's door, wondering if she was asleep. When I heard movement downstairs, I figured it was her.

Not sure, I ran back into our bedroom.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked.

"I think your mom's downstairs, but I'm not really sure."

Edward left the bed with his gun. "I'll check it out."

Once he left, I jumped for our bed, pulling the bassinet closer.

I was 90% sure it was his mom.

After last night, I was scared shitless of that other 10%.

Luckily, Edward didn't take too long. He entered our bedroom, looking even more troubled than he was earlier.

"It was your mom?"

He nodded, pulling the blankets up. "She's on the stoop with Colleoni—talking."

"Was she okay?" I asked.

He laughed. "Oh, she's fine. He even brought her flowers."

Remembering what she'd said earlier, I turned to him. "Are you sure she's okay with him being here?"

Edward shrugged. "Why wouldn't she be?"

I puzzled that thought for a second.

"Go pee so we can sleep."

"Yeah," I agreed, tiptoeing toward the bathroom.

It didn't take me long to clean up and take care of business. Edward was still awake when I got in bed. I adjusted myself, molding my body to his side, which is how we sleep.

"He gave me a promotion." Edward let that hang there. "I'm a capo."

I smiled, knowing that means a lot to wiseguys. "Congratulations."

Edward didn't seem happy about it. "It's more than that…I'm going to be the top _caporegime_. Colleoni's second-in-command…in the future, and when he dies…I'll be the boss."

"Wow." I stared at him, shocked. "That's good, right?"

He turned to meet my gaze. "There's a lot you don't know—shit I can't tell you. I guess it's good, we'll have more money."

I nodded. "Whenever you wanna try to explain, you can. Having people work for you, that's pretty cool. It'll be safer, right?"

He raised a brow. "Yeah, I guess. But did he gimme a bump to plow my mother again, and I'd be okay with it? It's not like I can do anything about it anyway…without risking my neck. Why should I even care?" He scoffed. "That's their business. I'm not getting involved."

"I don't think she'll do anything like that. They're old friends." I tried to ease his worries. "Even if that's why he's doing it, I don't think she will."

"She's probably only as happy as she is because she's seen him."

"No." I didn't believe that at all.


	123. Chapter 123

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA. **

**Tribute**

**Chapter 123**

**Bella POV**

Edward left to open the pizzeria at eleven. Elizabeth hadn't woken up yet, and Edward told me to leave it alone. She's never had a job, or whatever, so she sleeps late.

Nevertheless, when Eddie was content in his chair, I whipped up some breakfast—just some eggs and toast. I ate at the table while I hoped Elizabeth would wake up to join me.

But she didn't.

Concerned, no matter what Edward said, I went upstairs.

Edward's loud, bustling around the house while getting ready for the day. It doesn't matter who our guest is.

And Eddie can't help himself. He screams when he's hungry or needs changing, or if he's bored. I swear. Our son is smart enough to cry, just to grab our attention.

One of the loud mouths who live here should have woken her up.

Elizabeth should have been awake by now.

"Elizabeth…?" I knocked softly, straining to hear anything. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." She was short, and I waited.

There were sounds, but I couldn't place them, and then she opened her door—quick to close it behind herself. "Morning!" She smiled wide while pulling her hair into a messy bun. Elizabeth wore a long t-shirt that trailed to her knees, nothing fancy.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay," I said. "The bed was comfortable?"

She nodded. "Yes, everything's perfect." Elizabeth placed her arm around me, ushering me toward the stairs. "Is there coffee? We should drink some and talk—get to know each other."

"I'd like that," I admitted.

Her smile turned uneasy, and she waited for something as we stood on the steps. "So, coffee's ready?" She was obviously waiting for me to walk down.

"Yes, it is." I was half a flight down when her door opened again.

My head whipped to Elizabeth first, and she was waving her hand at whomever.

Stuck on stupid, I watched Alice's dad—Mr. Colleoni—tuck in his shirt. "I have nothin' to hide." He placed a kiss on Elizabeth's cheek. "I'll see you later." He walked down the stairs, pausing when we were on the same step. "Good morning, Isabella."

"G-Good morning," I stammered.

"I was never here," he said. "It might start unwanted trouble."

"Of course," I agreed but I still felt awkward, and this is my house now. "But…maybe youse two should get a hotel next time?" Surely, Mr. Colleoni could see how Edward might have a problem with this going on here.

I didn't fuckin' like it either, but I tried to mask the aggression I had.

"You got it." He smiled, and I watched him walk away.

I followed, knowing Elizabeth was behind me, to lock the door.

A car was waiting for him, and I wondered who saw him come and go.

When I turned, Elizabeth was crooning down to her grandson.

And I _couldn't_ let this go.

"I'm supposed to keep this from Edward?" I asked.

She blew out a shaky breath, composing her smile as she stood upright to face me. "Yes."

"Last night, you said all that stuff…" I trailed off, needing an explanation. "I don't keep things from Edward. I'm not in the habit of doing that." I gnashed my teeth together, angry.

Elizabeth walked to me and palmed my cheeks. "Sweetheart, I know you're young. There's a lot you don't know, a lot of lessons to be learned." She furrowed her brow. "I want Edward and me to get closer—have a relationship. If he found out, I don't know what he'd think. But Carlisle was right. It'd start trouble." She frowned, letting me go. "Hopefully, that won't happen again. I'll go home Sunday or Monday. Then, you guys can visit me in Seattle whenever."

"You…" I wanted to word my next question correctly. Seeing something in Elizabeth I used to see in myself, using deflection as a means of communication, my gut tied in knots. "You wanted to…do that, right?"

She waved a hand. "Doesn't matter. It was all right." Elizabeth turned for the kitchen.

"Wait a minute." I chased her. "If, if you didn't want to…you could have…said no." I felt young and stupid, thinking she should know this already.

"It took me a long while to get my head right." She poured herself some coffee. "When Edward finally came to live with me—when his piece-of-shit father died, I was messed up, still messed up. I was selfish. I treated his presence as more of a burden than a blessing. We had good times and bad times, and we fought a lot…I'm hoping to make up for that. Edward may not know, but I've always cared for him, always looked out for him." She helped herself to some sugar and cream.

"But…" I didn't understand what one had to do with the other.

She scoffed, palming her face. "Carlisle promised me it wouldn't be like this. I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention to bring bullshit, past drama into your lovely home, Isabella." Her smile was genuine. "You and Edward seem very happy, and that…it makes me even happier." She'd started to cry. "But I never wanted to come back here. I never wanted Edward to, either. But I couldn't control him. I knew he would—he'd come back, get his father's money, and take his father's place. I knew he would."

I stood there, knowing there might be more she wanted to get off her chest. "If Mr. Colleoni is bothering you, I think maybe we _should_ tell Edward."

Elizabeth laughed, walking past me to sit at the table with her mug. "Isabella, there's no saying 'no' to a man like Carlisle. I learned that a long time ago. And the real reason I came out here, besides making my apology to Edward…I wanted to make sure he was okay. I wanted to meet my grandson and you…I wanted…and now I realize I should have stayed out West." She shrugged, taking a sip from her cup. "When Carlisle called and told me about you and the baby, and Edward…he dangled the bait right in front of me. How was I not going to come back?"

I pulled a chair out to sit across from her.

"Last night, this morning, I did what I always do—I looked out for my son. Christ. I didn't think Edward would dive right in." She shook her head. "He's got his button already...so soon."

"Did…" my heart sank "—did he threaten Edward? If you didn't sleep with him, he'd…"

"No…it was just sex. I thought it best to keep Carlisle happy. When he kissed me, I just went with the flow. It wasn't bad or anything. Whatever." She was nonchalant. "I wasn't sure what he'd do if I denied him. Plus, he's done a lot for Edward, too, things he didn't have to. One hand washes the other…That's why it's best Edward never know. I can't imagine why he'd care, but I don't want any more trouble."

"But if you didn't want to—"

"It's done. It happened and it wasn't bad. Don't worry about me." She reached to squeeze my hand. "Monday, I'll be gone, and it'll be like I was never here." Elizabeth stared at me, and I tried to smile back. "Don't worry about me, okay? I learned how to play the game a very long time ago."

"He said he'd see you later…?" I wondered what that was about.

She rolled her eyes. "He wants to take me to the movies. Are we teenagers again? I…" She waved her hand. "I can't deny him, or not see him if he wants to see me. Understand? Carlisle loved Ed. There's nothing those two wouldn't do for each other. He left me alone while I was technically married, although what we had wasn't a marriage…Now, Ed's gone…I think he's trying to turn Edward into his father…but I don't know the end result. Carlisle wants a great many things for Edward. He wants to teach him, for Edward to have it all when he dies…I don't want that. I wish he never came back here. But Edward's too far into the game to forfeit. God knows what he did to get where he is so fast."

She looked to the ceiling. "And I don't want anything to happen to him. Like I said, I don't know what will happen. I just have to tough it out until Monday, and then everything will be normal."

She gave my hand a pat. "We've kept in touch over the years. I've accepted his help, too, and it was time for me to pay up. He said he'd keep his distance, and I think I knew that was a lie. I hoped for the best…I had to come out here to make sure Edward was okay. It's not like Carlisle will follow me back to Seattle. His life is here, and despite what he says, I don't mean anything to him," she sighed. "Now…I regret coming here. If I just stayed away, you wouldn't have to keep this secret, there'd be no issues…But Carlisle kind of insisted I come, too."

I shook my head. "Mr. Colleoni—"

"Woman to woman, I'm not willing to let my son get killed over something as stupid as sex . . . If Edward found out, he might have a problem, and say something to Carlisle. If they squabble, that'll make Edward his enemy. That's why Edward can't know. All right?"

"I won't say a word," I whispered.

"I know Carlisle…probably better than most. For Edward to get to the top, Carlisle has to trust him, which…he does trust Edward. I don't want anything to hinder that. If Carlisle thinks for a second that Edward is out to get him…"

"I understand," I said.

"Good." She blew out a breath.

**Thank you for reading.**

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**Bold Gestures Summary: "Young women can act silly, but men... Men make bold gestures." I opened the trunk for Bella. The man inside ended up on the pavement. Bella's eyes widened, and she covered her mouth. GangsterWard. *1958.* Romance/Angst - Bella & Edward - Chapters: 21- Status: Complete **

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